Cut for Time: College Admissions - SNL

[@alannaarabian5537]

"I would be the first person in my family to go to college.... it's not a race" lmao

[@anthonydion6734]

that was hilarious, it's like damn, that's cold blooded but you know that's happening all over the place, first-timers being turned down for less qualified legacies

[@kimora69]

😂😂😂

[@elessal]

damn... that has double meaning. was it intentional?

[@Sullaban]

The Classie Lassie a good skit ? I enjoyed it. I give you a link for an original video link is in brackets an original video of mine link is in brackets [ KAMALA HEY! Beatle tune gave ([e-mail]) the idea for this video. - KZbin ]

[@DarkSideChess]

That was the only funny bit

[@kaitymccoy5081]

"Luisa hasn't stabbed anybody, and I'm starting to hate her for that!"

[@123-k5o7f]

Lmaooo

[@Jason.cbr1000rr]

@@halliegeary8701 hi what's funny with that profile pic??

[@Jason.cbr1000rr]

@@halliegeary8701 ohh ok thanks for clarifying man/woman/other/gender x 🙂😎😎

[@lollabunyxxx]

@@Jason.cbr1000rr thanks for clarifying!!! that's all

[@reganwolf4405]

😆😅👌🏼

[@just_pierre4728]

“Why are you doing this to us deborah?” Best line

[@pan2aja]

Those sneaky East Asian

[@thatflatfellow]

Best line was Aunt Becky production

[@NazriB]

Lies again? Los Angeles Movies USD SGD

[@jttasb]

Heidi delivered that perfectly

[@adjustableWench]

@@thatflatfellow idk that last line got me - "u mean this whole time she wasnt really asian?" DED

[@phineasleon]

I mentor underprivileged snails after school and teach them the joys of soccer. I love soccer.

[@ElevenRats]

How are the snails doing?

[@cal_vin4068]

An aspiring story for those little snails....

[@noodlenado7827]

This is the cutest comment I’ve ever seen.

[@newflesh666]

For those that didn't pause the video this is what the extracurricular of Jackie Kebbler said.

[@dannyboy6966]

Fitbaw

[@niftynette9570]

"Is this a trap? Is this a trap?" 😆😆😆 Keenan's the best!

[@omarijohnson822]

Mike Studmuffin they call him the godfather?

[@jonas_hulse]

@@omarijohnson822 No, they don't call him the god father for nothing. Like they don't do it, and they don't have to do anything

[@ivi122]

NiftyNette He is my favorite. He’s hilarious. I haven’t watched SNL in a long time, like in a few years because most of those actors I knew and I don’t like them but I love him...is he still in SNL?

[@bryan_witha_whyy]

I wish they’d fire him. He’s not funny and he’s been there too long.

[@lvelvetj]

@@ivi122 Yes.

[@steeojabb1]

to be fair; anyone who can teach underprivileged snails to play soccer is a genius.

[@alicelamarr866]

This stupid comment does not serve an answer, but should not go unchallenged.

[@Diamondelight92]

She doesn't teach them HOW to play soccer, she merely teaches them the joys of soccer which I like to imagine just involves telling them about it

[@tyler89557]

@@Diamondelight92 Getting a snail to feel joy is an amazing feat in and of itself.

[@laurenring9721]

This was a fabulous interaction

[@jacobjamescabrera431]

I would admit this girl, in the hospital. She needs help tho. Why would snails enjoy soccer but not tennis?

[@a_literal_brick]

People who applied to top colleges without being rich or famous: (laughs in anxiety)

[@tq1990zhu]

You might have one drop of native blood.

[@ceds.9592]

Right.

[@natalie1220]

@@Sullaban huh?

[@briansounalath]

I got in cause I’m smarter 🤷🏾‍♂️

[@kenandrieling5885]

Or white

[@emilywright9680]

As someone who just got rejected from USC....this kind of makes me feel better 😂😂😂

[@thatunnamedredshirt]

You were probably a terrible applicant. I bet you didn't have the m̶o̶n̶e̶y̶ scores to get in anyway.

[@thatunnamedredshirt]

@Rafael Jingles I thought the sarcasm was obvious? I was pointing out that these schools claim test score are what matter, when in reality, something as arbitrary as how rich you are is what really matters, and that's fucked up

[@binyamina8850]

USC What's that?

[@thatunnamedredshirt]

@@binyamina8850 University of Southern California. It's one of the schools at the center of this scandal.

[@alh7197]

@ yikes🤦🏼‍♂️

[@Barista.Nathan]

Heidi's deadpan "Why are you doing this to us, Debra?" kills me every time.

[@Grayvorn]

Pure gold.

[@rphb5870]

I would have replied with: having asions students are fine, its having asiens in this room that's the problem.

[@stephenduong1360]

Are we going to give a nod to Sandra Oh's characterization of the Asian-American's vs. Harvard case that is going on right now as well? It's nuanced and unexpected, and I love it.

[@wejamus]

youtubesucks that’s rly racist man...

[@wejamus]

youtubesucks I know for a fact that I do more volunteer work than most of my non-Asian classmates. Half of the kids on student council are also Asian. Saying no Asians have leadership qualities or care about the community is as false as saying all mexican people are illegal immigrants or all black people are criminals

[@KaoruLiu01219]

@youtubesucks Let's take this one at a time. First, it is false that Asian students are lower on leadership and community care. If you read the lawsuit case + arguments (which you likely didn't), the only aspect that was shown to be consistently lower was personality. Even this aspect can be disputed as the statistics are skewed to be biased in favor of the SFA, which built the case as a vehicle to take down affirmative action. The only takeaway you can have is that Harvard's admissions office likely held similar false biases like the ones you hold, that Asians only are good academically and have no other merits. In reality, Asian students simply performed on average above the rest when it came to grades and test scores and compared equally with other candidates when it came to extracurriculars, leadership, and personality (this was shown by the fact that Asians scored equally well as other candidates during the personal interview section, where "personality" is actually apparent). Next, all your "evidence" refers to Asian adults, specifically Asian business owners, not Asian students, so it is entirely irrelevant. It speaks nothing of Asian students. The claim that Asian business owners don't care outside of their own race is also ignorant of the social contexts. When first-generation Asian immigrants came to the US, they faced backlash and unfair obstacles especially in the business world, except when interacting with other Asians. Why try to take part in organizations that constantly deny you entry? Asian-Americans also tend to take part in other Asian groups because they are IMMIGRANTS; this is how they connect to the culture they left behind. / When it comes to Asian business owners paying lower salaries, YOU are looking at outliers. First where is your source for this? In general, salaries are not publicly available, so it seems you're basing this off very selective data. But let's take your claim about programmers (this isn't even the right term; it's software engineer, developer, etc.) making less under Asian-owned companies. Google, Microsoft, Adobe, Mastercard, Nokia and many more are ran by Asian CEOs, and the software engineers at these companies are among the highest paid. Of course, Asians care about the constitution. Most Asians who come to the US, care about the US and are grateful that they have built a place for themselves here. Why else would they come? In fact, many become American citizens, which actually requires you to have reasonable knowledge of the constitution. Most native-born Americans don't. Next, what does it mean to care about freedom?? At this point "freedom" is just an American political buzzword. Pretty much all developed nations have "freedom"; it's not the 1700s anymore. Politically, everyone tends to vote for their race, especially minorities, because minorities know that they are underrepresented and want people in leadership positions that understand their background. But also, white people will vote for other white people as well even if it's not best for the community. This is normal, and also your point doesn't mean much since it's subjective what best for the community means. Asians may vote for an Asian representative because that is the only candidate who will actually care about their needs. That's how our democratic system is designed. We don't vote for what's best for the majority; this eliminates minority opinions (I mean minority as in the inverse of majority not minority races) many of which are the primary sources of progress since the majority does not want to change. So we vote for what's best for us, and in the end, ideally we get the best overall result for everyone in the end. You will find that as a whole, community outreach is increasing among Asians, as a result of newer generations. Why? Because older generations did not care about community outreach. They were working to make a living. On the other hand, newer generations of Asians are simply Americans. They participate in community outreach just as much as any other person. This last statement about Asians being robots, is horribly racist. It has no truth, only a representation you've learned from the media. There are Asians with poor grades, Asians that play sports, as well as Asians who are book nerds. Having good grades and good test scores is not mutually exclusive with being a well-rounded human being with creativity, leadership ability, and self-reflective thought. Next, it is not xenophobic to not assimilate into American culture. It is also not invading. If you do not speak of European/white immigrants as invaders, then don't speak about Asian immigrants, or any other race, as invaders. On the other hand, American culture has been xenophobic towards Asians, either explicitly through laws (Chinese ban, Japanese internment camps) or implicitly (stereotyping in the media and in the workplace and denying representation in higher levels of leadership). Next, explain what a patriot is, or a person with a well-balanced thought process. My guess is that your definitions will contradict. Patriotism, in excess, is propaganda, and no thoughtful person would follow it. Now this last statement. The incredibly banal thought that you can be smart but bad at tests. And that creativity! Innovation! And leadership skills! are more valuable. This can be true. But disregarding socioeconomic differences, learning disabilities, etc. someone who has poor grades/low test scores indicates subpar retention of things they learn, an inability to apply concepts to new ideas, and a lack of problem solving skills. Tests have gotten significantly better at evaluating these factors. For creativity and innovation, especially now in a technological world where most things are pretty advanced, progress is hard to make without extremely technical backgrounds. BUT SPECIFICALLY FOR COLLEGE ADMISSIONS, oh boy do grades and test scores matter. They don't have to be perfect, but there's no use accepting someone no matter what your leadership skills are if you don't have the academic ability to survive at an Ivy League university. You'll flunk out in a semester. AND AGAIN, high grades aren't mutually exclusive with leadership skills or any other soft skills for that matter. Almost all accepted students are at the top in all areas, academically or otherwise. They are among the most passionate and most motivated students, and also have the most valuable, yet actually well-informed, ideas. Oh and also, when it comes to meritocracy, often the least qualified accepted students are white.

[@yuufeternal5837]

Also the whole specialized schools ordeal in NYC. Except they're going to do away with testing and any Tom, Dick, and Harry can get in without even earning their way in.

[@gonosol]

Dylan T. Man, I really appreciate you putting in all this work to write a rebuttal, even though the original comment has been deleted. You pretty much put everything that this admissions scandal thing has made me feel into words. So thanks for that.

[@waliyathompson-vannuck7116]

"You mean the whole time she really wasn't Asian, Gaaahdd!!!???"😄😄😄

[@heyalun]

Very realistic. Sounds exactly like some of my family members

[@bederbederp]

the best line ive ever heard

[@JosephPark]

This is based off true college admissions news and accusations this is hilarious

[@SmallSpoonBrigade]

I'm pretty sure this is how they decide which students get financial aid at typical college campuses.

[@calisongbird]

Joseph Park #CaptainObvious strikes again

[@wms1650]

@@SmallSpoonBrigade I guess all the illegal admissions are over now. One got 14 days and the next may serve 2 or 3 months. End of admissions scandal.

[@anthonydion6734]

look at Joseph finding the relevance. Well done

[@johnholder6571]

Wow Joseph really gets it, he’s got an eye for comedy

[@kaushikdr]

"Listen to her essay - 'I would be the first person in my family to go to college.' It's not a race." XD

[@kevindavis3234]

That was the biggest laugh for me!

[@kellz8260]

He probaly got the stabbing out of his system. DEAD 😂😂😂

[@armayafox1328]

His stab victims probably are, too.

[@kevinoconnor497]

No but u will be

[@astrocitizen]

I remember this one guy in the same dorm building and floor as I was my last year. Probably the applications board's reasoning for letting him in too.

[@NazriB]

Lies again? Hello Cash

[@GamersName]

chief oh no he didn't :D

[@buildwithme1634]

I don't understand that?

[@kaleno1188]

2:55

[@Sullaban]

I watched it twice distracting and very good. I have a link for an original video. The link is in brackets that is quite interesting. video link is in brackets [KAMALA HEY! Beatle tune gave ([e-mail]) the idea for this video. - KZbin] good video.

[@adamwallace3647]

If they did this in 2020 SNL woulda been cancelled

[@theotherway1639]

The book "Bad Biz: Your Guide to Starting a For Profit College" by Corin Devaso is an interesting read. It's satire that shows how some colleges scam.

[@xxbigbangxx1]

*Why are you doing this to us, Deborah?*

[@kizarumelon2477]

😂

[@christinec.3506]

Out of all the loudly delivered lines - this one little line was pure gold 😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣

[@daflotsam]

@@christinec.3506 That and Keenan double "Is this a trap" right before it. I really hope we see more of Heidi next season. She's sharp.

[@danierupieru5640]

“You mean this whole time she really wasn’t Asian”

[@queenb7209]

LMAOOO

[@albilele297]

@@queenb7209 tbh I didn't get that joke!

[@kevinzacharywalker7758]

She's clearly not. I don't know how they couldn't see it. She's definitely a white supremacists.

[@jaymills8786]

“Do you guys feel like we’re admitting to many Asians students “ Silence... “...Is the this a trap ???”

[@howardhokie9750]

I can tell this might have affected you since you cannot understand the difference between to and too...

[@Everythingsdonewrong]

Howard Hokie bruh shut the fuck up, what r u talking about

[@kevinhooks1]

Jay Mills yes, yes it was

[@brrendan]

You're also forgetting "is the this" 😂😂

[@ermguitar2052]

@@howardhokie9750 If there's any reason to call this comment stupid, it's the fact that it's just quoting the video and not applying any extra creativity or humor, not the fact that there's a grammar mistake.

[@jacquelynn2051]

This sketch is misleading. There are no black men on college admission panels.

[@Hanapetals]

Jacquelynn sure there are, it’s just that they’re the Ben Carson’s of the world lol

[@LickMyMusketBallsYankee]

Let's guess "Jacquelynn"s race, shall we?

[@katiel9779]

🔥🔥🔥

[@lectercita]

I don't know if you're joking or not?

[@susannam3923]

@@LickMyMusketBallsYankee what?

[@alexsparks-bakota3099]

"I mentor underprivileged snails after school to teach them the joys of soccer. I love soccer.

[@brinagirl12]

“You mean this whole time she wasn’t really asian” omg hahaha

[@garrasonj]

Sandra Oh is honestly a gift to earth

[@EdwardThimbleHands]

I heard Mars is fucking furious we got her.

[@HSPTheShow]

really? how?

[@twilightgardenspresentatio6384]

Garry meh

[@geccec3533]

Sandra Oh is the queen of my heart. ✨❤

[@HSPTheShow]

@@geccec3533 srsly. why. what do u see in the performance that makes u say that i really dont get it

[@ShinRyojin]

“An Aunt Becky production” I spit out my coffee from that line! 😂😂😂

[@prennt57g99]

Imagine being the company that SNL paid to print a “gay redskin” on a shirt

[@kevinzacharywalker7758]

They do that actually themselves. Every major production company has people who can produce stuff quickly for them, that they will use on set. So the company you're looking for is actually SNL.

[@jerroldkazynski5480]

T-shirt Hell?

[@elsonlam]

My guess is it's cheaper for them to do it themselves. They sell materials in craft stores.. Print the image onto the special paper, iron it onto the shirt. It appears really quickly and far from the camera. Nobody is going to notice the low quality job.

[@JamieStLouis-tu9ml]

Not necessarily low quality an d al you have to do is go to your local screen printer a few days before and say can you print this art work on a shirt. Then pay for it.

[@jelliclesongs]

omg

[@dannygatsby3941]

"Chief Oh No he didn't" I'm in tears!

[@kissyjimenez1364]

Sandra Oh No She Didn't

[@gummieworms3909]

I did ❤ that name😂😂🤣✌

[@aparnarajakumar4606]

"An Aunt Becky Production" that killed me lmao

[@jonoave]

I don't get it. Could you explain the context?

[@aparnarajakumar4606]

becky is a character from full house and she’s played by lori loughlin...

[@danshazam8511]

@@jonoave duhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

[@zahranoorulsahrhasan4113]

Aunt Becky was Lori Loughlin's character on Full House. Loughlin is one of the actresses involved in the college admissions scandal.

[@ailinborquez5795]

I was looking for this comment! THANKS!

[@msgoblin1994]

tell me why Keenan looked legitimately concerned when he asked if it was a trap! lmao

[@NateFordify]

Acting

[@jackgregory9551]

He was going to laugh because of the voice crack as he said it

[@mickeygray1955]

"Admissions Police: An Aunt Becky Production" I love that little bit

[@ramsdankha2174]

This is so unrealistic why would that girl even bother applying when she didn’t even stab nobody.

[@skyhr]

"I mentor underprivileged snails and teach them the joys of soccer" Great writing SNL writer! Greating writing ;)

[@ellievampmtf]

"My mom is German and my dad is Count Chocula" Oh my lord I died

[@zaidjamal]

Saw the count chocula gag a mile a way the second she said her name

[@pryingeyes1551]

@@zaidjamal Same.

[@johnsorrow1987]

Had me rollin'

[@necessaryevil7777]

ofc that's how the coach got into college herself...and her job!

[@sabrazafarano9651]

we all died

[@YayWei320]

“Louisa hasn’t stabbed anyone yet and I’m starting to hate that about her” 😂

[@coreymineard]

An Aunt Becky Production. That KILLED me!

[@evelynwashere13]

😂😂😂😂 they knew SNL was going to get them

[@elbassman416]

Hell yea

[@cree9887]

“an aunt becky production” OMG THE MF SHADE

[@rengelarconado8590]

"Why are you doing this to us Deborah?". That line was perfectly delivered HAHAHAHA

[@RetroBell1999]

"Why are you doing this to us Debra"🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@filmlifee4955]

That took menout 🤣😂🤣

[@christopherpareja8630]

The Asian joke was a knock at Harvard lmao

[@Laggie74]

It's a knock on all elite colleges. If they go by academic performance alone, they'd probably be 90% Asian.

[@nomanmon]

@Laggie But instead to appease the crying mobs they’ll, in the name of equality, have to judge people by their race and turn away more Asians and accept more blacks, simply based on race.. Equality in 2019, right?

[@MTMF.london]

UCLA and Berkeley.

[@Love2memore]

@@nomanmon oh I see it's the blacks that are the problem, is that where you are going with this? How many black people do you think are in Harvard exactly?

[@nomanmon]

@@Love2memore Nope, blacks aren't lol. Shouldn't define people by their race (Like these colleges are), define them by their character.. in this case, their history and qualifications in regards to being accepted. What an odd thought process you must have to immediately come to that convoluted conclusion.

[@georgemichael3078]

"she was undercover... you mean this entire time, she wasnt really Asian!?"

[@eboknows9812]

"A land boat." That's a good one.

[@tylerclark-realtor]

Mom: You’re going to college! You will be the first from our family to attend college, end of story! Me: Mom chill, it’s not a race!

[@jaycoleman6552]

*_*You're_**

[@jcsantos0005]

Yeah good luck, do you know how many more minorities have first of their families applying?

[@TruckTaxiMoveIt]

@@jaycoleman6552 given the edit suggestion and the corresponding edit I'm guessing another year in high school probably wouldn't hurt

[@tylerclark-realtor]

Truck Taxi 😂😂😂😂 Touché

[@tylerclark-realtor]

Filthy Fingers of Fury I simply made the comment because I thought the college bit was funny that’s all.

[@GalinDray]

I like that they recognize Geoffrey the Giraffe is fictional but the Keebler Elves/Count Chocula are real and loaded.

[@propogandalf]

The founder of Keebler cookies is actually named Keebler

[@thomasw.5344]

@@propogandalf And ... ?

[@spector6223]

"Is this a trap? Is this a trap?"

[@Greendragon420able]

Amy Kinsella It’s a tarp.

[@ClarkGirl2014]

Amy Kinsella 😂😂😂

[@kiersten7013]

“And his last name is Jeffrey’s could that be in relation to the giraffe” 😂😂😂😂

[@sabrazafarano9651]

that was the line!!

[@jorceshaman]

@@sabrazafarano9651 Whose line is it, anyways?

[@JaneDoe-ci3gj]

I loved the line with Jeffrey!😂👍

[@shekijones3713]

"I would be the first person in my family to go to college" Me: Wow! That would be... Kenan: It's not a race Me: Dead

[@estieeu2364]

'Why are doing this to us Debra?"😂😂

[@scottinsd1]

This is one of the BEST "cut for time" SNL skits I've ever seen in my entire life!

[@csic123]

I don't understand why this skit was cut from the episode. This skit was funny as hell. 😂😂😂

[@jjmanzano9]

How is it cut for time if it is a live show?

[@maazkalim]

.@@jjmanzano9 They perform it during commercial-breaks, perhaps? 🤔

[@JamiePohlOA]

Maaz Kalim They also do a dress rehearsal in front of an audience, so the crew is probably filming.

[@WangMotions]

Their standards of what sketches are cut make no sense to me

[@tom_something]

3:40 - "'I would be the first person in my family to go to college.' It's not a race." Most underrated line of the whole thing.

[@LessGo7921]

Kenan's voice crack at 5:44 has me dead!

[@kennyg.6608]

Indycar F1 64, I think kenon is wearing his self out...not nearly as funny as he was a few years ago...

[@nedrog]

"I would be the first person in my family to attend college." "ITS NOT A RACE" dead

[@tyffaneelavely8087]

Sandra Oh always feels like a real cast member. Does a great job. No one beats Adam Driver though. He should not only be a permanent cast member, but he would be in my top favorite cast members. The man is hysterical.

[@kevinha3192]

Do you ever feel we are admitting too many Asian students"? Is this a trap? ROFL

[@JahowYu]

They even got the Common App extracurricular formatting correct 😂

[@DJDawsonEdge]

That's Harvard's Stoughton hall in the background.

[@jsmn5059]

Wow I didn't see that ending coming. That was pretty good. Also the bit about the mascot was genius.

[@tjshapiro2677]

"That is what we call a land boat." Oh, thank you for telling me the proper way to refer to that. I've been calling it a horse my whole life!

[@Spaceysgurl]

The realness makes this sad. I laughed. People have to laugh to keep from crying.

[@1perle]

Agree 😕

[@sabrazafarano9651]

helps me

[@sheryldeenyl9736]

I am so happy Sandra is getting the credit she deserves

[@kylo_sten]

Why are you doing this to us Deborah

[@noamvebman2766]

This was painful to watch. Not because it was not funny, but because it was so true. 😔

[@marthameza6033]

🌊🌊 *I МÀSТURВ!ÀТЕ Т0 VIDЕ0!S 0N МY СHАN!NЕL! !L00K!* ⭐️⭐️⭐️

[@LRissa19]

Riiighht!

[@jennyinpink22]

Yes

[@pop5678eye]

The anti-affirmative-action crowd never campaigns against legacy admissions. And those take up huge percentages at private universities!

[@5698-e2d]

So let's just dismiss their valid criticism of one injustice, because they do not actively campaign against another......

[@ellasteciuk3353]

The real injustice in elite college admissions is not affirmative action nor legacy admissions, but rather the massive advantage given to students from feeder schools. Students from elite boarding schools, such as Phillips Exeter, Choate Rosemary Hall, Deerfield Academy, etc., are held to much lower standards for admission than the rest of the applicant pool, and take up a much larger portion of the applicant pool than legacies. The majority of my friends at Amherst went to one of the top boarding schools (and most of my friends went to a private school of some sort), and my brother is going through the admissions process for these feeder schools for his last two years of high school (although I did not attend one), due to a combination of getting a huge advantage for top schools and my parents getting fed up with our local public school’s BS (long story). As a legacy student at Amherst College (second-best liberal arts college in the country, 11% acceptance rate last year), the legacy advantage is not nearly as big as people think it is; legacies do have significantly higher acceptance rates than the overall applicant pool, but this is LARGELY due to the fact that they have much better test scores and grades on average than the rest of the applicant pool. I’m not saying legacy doesn’t help, but if it’s just a case of one or two parents who haven’t donated any money to the school (my dad is the only other family member who went to Amherst at my time of application, and he has hardly donated any money, and his last donation was a long time ago), it usually only acts as a tipping point. I had a 1560 SAT, straight A’s, the most challenging curriculum available in my school, was ranked in the top 1% of my class, and was a committed rower for all four years of high school, and had what others told me to be one of the best essays they had seen. I got rejected by Harvard, Princeton, Yale, Stanford, Dartmouth, and Brown; waitlisted by Williams, Bowdoin, and Colby; and accepted by Amherst, Middlebury, Davidson, Vassar, Bates, UNC, NC State, and a local school. Correlation =/= causation.

[@5698-e2d]

@C The electoral college has nothing to do with college admissions.

[@ryanyang3347]

@@ellasteciuk3353 Feeder schools don't offer that much of an advantage. There will obviously be more students from these feeder schools as these feeder schools have their own admissions department which are in some cases(such as andover) almost as selective as some ivy league colleges

[@ellasteciuk3353]

Ryan Yang I respect your opinion, however I disagree. I know it may appear that way and a lot of students at said boarding schools think this is true, but it is simply not. Yes, the feeder schools do have pretty low acceptance rates, with Phillips Academy (Andover) having one at 13%, if you are highly qualified by boarding school standards (not nearly as high as Ivy League standards), you have a very high chance of getting into one of the elite boarding schools if you apply to several of them (which most people do; this is why individual boarding school acceptance rates appear low). Most highly qualified students will get into at least one feeder school. I am friends with a ton of feeder school alumni, and while I love them, they are not as academically amazing as you would think. My best friend for the first month was a Choate alumna, and she dropped out of Amherst a month in because she said the school was too much pressure for her. She also said the Amherst workload was a lot heavier than her Choate workload, and even though she did well at Choate, she was at the bottom of the class in all of her Amherst classes.

[@iamdidi.]

I feel like Kenan's voice did that on accident at 5:46 LOL he tried so hard to conceal his emotions

[@mickeysmyspiritanimal223]

daisy v , he does try hard at that. He breaks into a smile at times! 😐🙂😊😆😂🤣

[@shadowchief2788]

I've been playing that over like several times dying! I was just about to say something about his voice cracking.. lmfao! Either way it made it more hilarious!!!!!

[@NineteenEightyFive]

The fictional giraffe from toys r us?

[@iluvcamaros1912]

I'm a 29 year old adult man and I felt a bit sad when they brought up the Toys-R-Us bankruptcy...

[@yaiyaiboo1]

Everytime I ride by one thats closed it hurts......really bad

[@QRSC-fh2ob]

*Я

[@fourthcasper6161]

Everytime I ride by toys R Us I think "hmmm I used shop in there and now i shop in sex and toys for my grown up toys"

[@JCJeffrey]

🔥🔥🔥

[@shouldwemakethis]

why is Kenan always hilarious? lol even when his voice cracks, its gold!

[@alisaoliver1969]

This is almost too realistic!! This is probably what they really do!!😝

[@TheSweetForever]

cashkarthik to black people. That’s funny.

[@TheSweetForever]

cashkarthik mhm. Because that’s exactly what happens. Maybe you shouldn’t throw away your childhood. That’s your fault. Don’t blame another race for your shortcomings. Also, any minority knows not to select their race on applications. That’s just a rookie move.

[@fayetopias]

The Sweet Forever You are so fucking ignorant.

[@fayetopias]

cashkarthik Don’t even stress over their ignorant asses. They obviously don’t know what affirmative action is.

[@selenefae6761]

Yes I agree. I applied to Cal Poly San Luis Obispo with a 4.3 GPA and a 1440 SAT and I get rejected yet two of my classmates with 2.5 GPAs and 1000 SATs get in. It makes no sense.

[@cearabostick9315]

No " An Aunt Becky production" comments? That was hilarious. 😂

[@geovannip4334]

That the most hilarious part lmfaooo

[@heyalun]

I don't get it

[@lexisacci7104]

heyalun Lori Loughlin paid for her her two daughters to get into school, and she played Aunt Becky on Full House.

[@rielo9725]

“Chief Oh-No-He-Didn’t” literally knocked the wind out of me!😂🤣😂🤣

[@Ocholovelace]

“An Aunt Bucky Production.” Should not have been cut

[@pop5678eye]

The rich privileged getting at the front of the line for Harvard admission? I'm shocked! It never ever happened before... except since the founding of the college!

[@kahlilbenjamin7298]

The good old American way

[@smiller2044]

💯

[@Subxenox15]

Minorities are getting into school just because they are minorities, which is just as bad as people paying to get in. Asians are getting screwed though, rich or poor, they need twice the grade of a black person to get in.

[@junsu21]

Xeno Entertainment needs more education. There's absolutely no evidence that Asians need twice the grades of blacks (or latinos) to get into elite colleges. You are repeating a bogus talking point pandered by racists who love to find anything to keep black people subjugated. It's disgusting. Have you ever met a black student from an elite college? Have you ever seen the data for their grades and test scores? Such a neanderthal

[@sunnydreux]

Demetrius Evans preach! They still believe the myth that black students are benefiting from affirmative action exclusively. The fact of the matter is those Ivy League admissions are based on a many of criteria outside of academia. Who are your parents, who do you know, race quota, gender quota, legacy etc. The list could go on. Everything in America is politics...

[@burnpygmalion39]

“an aunt becky production” nice

[@evillyn7895]

"Chief OhnoUDidn't" Lol'd and woke the baby... **WORTH IT!**

[@ClueSign]

"I mentor underprivileged snails."

[@NicolasGanea]

SNL I don't know how you got into that meeting and were allowed to film?! good thing you did! You got them red handed

[@movieedge7370]

SNL should take all these cut for time sketch’s and make 1hr prime time specials . I would watch , anyone else ?

[@Ou8y2k2]

Yep. It would be all Kyle all the time.

[@jaycoleman6552]

*_*SKETCHES_** . Sketch's specifically refers to ONE sketch.

[@cmj199318]

More bathroom skits.

[@claredelune]

Or we can just watch them here, a few hours after the show.

[@tejaswoman]

Love it!

[@jhh6061]

“I know I’m not supposed to say this but.....would bang”. I’M DEAD 🤣🤣🤣

[@wolfm8097]

“I’m the first in my family to go to College...”- applicant “It’s not a race...”- Keenan killed it

[@garebfeumba5407]

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@baytate8612]

Chief Oh-no-he-didnt!! 🤣🤣🤣

[@EricChamplin]

Can confirm this is accurate. The youngest Jonas Brother was admitted into my college because of his status (and was actually recently expelled for drug usage).

[@theroadtocosplayandcomicco5840]

Which one ?

[@ibepoppinmycollar]

The Road to Cosplay and Comic Con Frankie Jonas. The only brother not in the band

[@ericbenitez2434]

Frankie Jonas graduated????

[@esmeeimanimorals2321]

What college was this?

[@BubburTee]

Lmao fr??

[@ElizabethT45]

"Aw, it's gonna be so sad to lose Chief Oh No He Didn't" 🤣🤣🤣

[@kleptrep94]

Fun fact: This is the first ever cut for time sketch not to involve Kyle Mooney at any point. But yeah Chris Redd's Asian line at the end was a great punchline.

[@marceloromero4515]

That's excellent observation! I was beginning to think that Mooney was being singled out.. Also, may I ask in all honesty, do you think this week's episode was any good?

[@kleptrep94]

Honestly I did think that this episode wasn't as good as John Mulaney's one but it was probably one of the good ones. And that was mainly due to Sandra Oh wanting to be part of the show. Like there's some hosts which are there just because they have to be and then there's others like Sandra that are clearly fans of the show so I'd think it was a solid 7 out of 10 episode. Like the Future Me and the Office Birthday sketches were my two favourite sketches of the episode. And I found probably Jossie Smollett's Making Excuses sketch the weakest. But I can't wait for a fortnight when BTS shows up.

[@Levacque]

I can't believe they would cut a scene that actually had an ending

[@kimi88cz]

Lori Loughlin would be great in this one..

[@curtiskretzer8898]

No.The 1 blond from Desperate Housewives... her name's escaping me

[@dannigro8794]

Curtis Kretzer Felicity Huffman

[@curtiskretzer8898]

@@dannigro8794 sarcasm Dan Nigro(sarcasm)

[@cyboman75]

What does Aunt Becky have to do with college admissions? Nicky and Alex are only toddlers.

[@fifiaames5935]

Are you thick or is that your attempt at humour?

[@chloelopez9125]

“Is this a tRaP” it wasn’t intentional for the voice crack but it made it so much better.

[@brockalbert5111]

Johnny Ferrgno?! LOL Making fun of how Olivia Jade wasn't even that famous. Just a child of a minor TV star from the 90's.

[@Mangoo-o]

Brock Albert she was on 90210 right

[@americansniper1641]

Brock Albert well yea who do you think is dumb enough to pay for a Harvard admission

[@Ezero8]

The best skit of the night and they freaking cut it?! Unbelievable...

[@spencerlee8064]

"I agree. He Hollywood, he fun"

[@rickrizzle423]

LMAO! Chief Oh-No-He-Didnt!

[@ashley-8612]

That was the best 😂

[@youtubeuser5269]

Omg who paid for this to be cut?

[@mariadelosangelesrodriguez5858]

hahaha

[@Killua481]

They didnt want the undercover agents identity revealed obv

[@violetenergy4392]

Universities/Feds/govt puppets.

[@heatherstarling1653]

“Yeah, Luisa hasn’t stabbed anyone yet, and I’m starting to hate that about her.” 🤣😂🤣 Me too

[@GoldenBlissWithin]

"Chief O'No-he-didn't" 😆😆😆😆😂

[@elizardbeth666]

This was funnier than half of the sketches tonight.. no idea who decides which sketches get cut but it always seems like they do a terrible job lol

[@jakesizer6483]

5:44 "Is this a trAp, is this a trap?"

[@JeremyAnna16]

😂😂

[@hassanpalomo4705]

Kennan has gotten so much better. "Why are you doing this to us" timing got so good.

[@AlvaSudden]

"But he's probably gotten all the stabbing out of his system." lol

[@tomiakintunde3716]

the way Kenan said "is this a trap" twice is killing me

[@catherineangel7]

Kenan...I'll be the first one in my family to go to college. It's not a race. 😂😂😂

[@vistastructions]

3:05 "and I know I'm not supposed to say this about the applicant, but... would bang!" This had me dying

[@maazkalim]

Totally professional.. ...And, noble! Indeed.

[@thatguywiththeravioli386]

TF THIS ONE WAS THE FUNNIEST ONE

[@agonleed3841]

That's pretty sad, actually

[@romo_sapiens]

Is this a trap? Kenan rules!

[@cupcakes7015]

Arturo Romo 💯 3/31/19

[@marktheshark7588]

This skit is not only funny.But pretty accurate.

[@_MemeMachine]

The most topical and relevant sketch was cut for time...

[@cobrakingofeart]

they needed more time to propagandize about how bad trump is

[@DeadMemesAndWeirdDreams]

there was only one sketch about trump, and it was the cold open@@cobrakingofeart

[@JonSmith-hk1bq]

Meh, there really wasn't much actual comedy in there. The whole was played out after the first minute and then it went on for another five.

[@cobrakingofeart]

@@DeadMemesAndWeirdDreams *shrug* i try watching but nowadays the trump bashing just leaves too bad a taste and i have to stop watching. there's just too many lies and too much kool-aid drinking.

[@DeadMemesAndWeirdDreams]

cobrakingofeart Not a fan of Trump personally, but I can understand the stance. That being said, you have to realize that SNL makes fun of EVERY president. Edit: spelling and grammar

[@chretienli6405]

This is funny but at the same time so sad😭 Especially for those of us who are in the college process or soon to be

[@lauramoody543]

"my mother is German and My dad is Count Chocula" hahahah ded