Seeing God’s Family through the Overview Lens | Tamara W. Runia | October 2023 General Conference

Sister Runia teaches that there is power and joy when we view ourselves and our loved ones from a big-picture perspective.
I believe we can, through the eye of faith, zoom out and view ourselves and our families with hope and joy.
www.churchofjesuschrist.org/s...

[@rickmiles3048]

I watched Tammy grow up in our ward as a small child until she went off to college. What she said about her father is so true. As one of my friends and mentor he taught me so much and I just wish I took his example sooner rather than later. Please know that she has learned so much from trials and errors but she is now an example of a mother and leader who has so much to give to the young women of the church. Thank you Tammy for your life and example.

[@haelthibeault3092]

This was my favorite talk this conference! It’s filled with hope and truth. I’m already making a list of quotes from this one talk.

[@kimberlywilson4929]

So so many amazing inspired quotes. This was definitely from her eternal soul and all of her life experiences ❤❤️❤️❣️

[@MelePaasi]

I had the honour of having Sister Runia as our spiritual mentor on the mission. She truly acts and speaks by the spirit!!

[@Glen.Danielsen]

I absolutely agree, Hael, my favorite talk at this conference also! I used the “show transcript” feature here to capture quotes too. Cheers! 🙏🏽😉

[@debbiehall362]

Thank you so very much❤

[@beautahfulbees]

I listen to this talk over and over. Thank you Sister Runia. It brings me so much peace. I feel the spirit every time and so I know this is truth! Thank you!

[@8missblue8]

I’m crying. This talk was an absolute answer to my desperate prayers. Thank you. ❤❤❤

[@user-ck2qg2rk4t]

Every family needs to hear this.

[@nathanbanks2935]

If we choose to lift those around us, we ascend together! "If we want to go fast, go alone. If we want to go far, go together." Love is the thing that changes hearts. Great insight!

[@jh-nl8yf]

너무 와 닿는 말씀이네요 감사합니다

[@TExplainsitAll]

She spoke my precise struggle. Thank you HF for conference!

[@robinkat]

That is a great talk.

[@angelaroy9696]

I have watched this multiple times and shared it with loved ones. This message is one we, and the world needs to hear. Thank you.

[@AMBERLARIOS-qz2lq]

Im very discouraged tonight 😢 so i love it!!!!😊

[@mistymonsen2894]

I love the- let’s not stand at the tree and worry part- that’s what I do most of the time. Stand at the tree and be happy and show unconditional love and know that because of Jesus, it will all work out in the end! ❤

[@fourbirdstos]

❤

[@cathywong4033]

Thank you Sister Tamara ❤ Love you.

[@tanyarobinson1146]

My 19 year old daughter looked at me after this talk, and she said, "Mom, I understand you know". I have always been close to this daughter, so it was very sweet to hear.

[@cpinkish6546]

Thank you Sister Runia! I loved your inspired words💜

[@saranoelwilliams1494]

What an inspiring talk! Her message was just what I needed right now❤️❤️

[@carolmorton7213]

Superb talk!

[@suzannecalton]

Stop, this was my most favorite talk. 😂 There will never be one talk that every single person loves. But this one would be pretty close. A message of hope, mentoring, love, and pressing forward- coming from someone who understands a rebellious phase and just felt that worry last Tuesday. Amazing. When I read talks, I don’t look for what I don’t like (exhausting!), I look for the spirit talking to me directly. And this talk hit me on so many levels. Thank you Jesus for people who serve in this, a very vulnerable and public way. And double thank you when they NAIL it as this dignified SISTER has!!!

[@Josh-pz2lx]

This talk was one of me and my wife’s favorites. Thank you for your message!

[@karadanvers6136]

I needed to hear this talk today. i try to listen to a few talks during the week, but i've lapsed about 3 weeks now, and it helped me realize that going to church isnt about God giving us all kinds of rules all the time, but it is his way of sending us messages of love, to both hear and feel :)

[@estherlongmore9443]

This was my absolute favorite talk this conference. Such a beautiful message of hope and trusting that through Christ, all things will be ok, someday, somehow. And even though they may not be ok right now, I can feel ok now and have hope in what lies ahead. ❤

[@rknebeker9310]

It helped my mother know helping her grandkids and that is stay connected to the gospel. My thoughts are stay and cover home base. Someone needs to stay home.

[@barbaraneville9056]

She gave me hope!

[@robertycmat3034]

One of my favorite talks from this General Conference! So many truths eloquently shared.

[@daniellewild1854]

I needed this message. Thank you Sister Runia. ❤

[@user-dv4xq3gw8z]

I watched this Saturday. ❤❤❤❤❤ Thank you so much for sharing. GOD BLESS YOU ALL 🙏 ❤️

[@aussiefor]

What we put our attention on grows. EXCELLENT TALK❤❤❤❤❤❤❤

[@traceypease3024]

Thank you for this talk. With childhood abuse in my childhood and my family active I have probably for the last 35 years felt abounded by God. I was abounded by my family when I came out with my abuse. I have a hard time praying because God is a father figure. I have often asked in interviews etc.. How I get over this. I have not received or not in the frame of mind to hear how to get over it. You have given me a pathway now to do it. By praying that our afflictions will work out for our good. Thank you again.

[@user-op3zx4dd8x]

One does not get over it....we get through it as best as we can. We have the burden of carrying it with us. (I've tried getting away from it so to speak but is forever negativity affecting my life like some chronic disease) Being hated or blamed for what someone else did to you as a child is so hard to heal from..... when no one wants to know about it. Jesus knows what you are going through. "Keep your eye on the ball". I'm so sorry to hear that this has happened to you. Your prayers are heard, and you are loved beyond measure.

[@soniasmiles100]

Wow… the essence of the gospel and thinking celestial on earth is LOVE.

[@kimpatterson9257]

I loved this talk. It has made me ponder greatly.

[@christinaparks3686]

I love the comment "stay at the tree"....partake of the fruit and stay at the tree ....right on point!!!

[@willsharphomes]

Awesome talk, one of the talks that really spoke to me and made me feel like God understands what we're going through and how to help us! I love that we can revisit these talks so quickly after General Conference!

[@churchofjesuschristgeneralconf]

We're so glad it's been helpful - thanks for tuning in!

[@ronaleeheywood9723]

I sure need this message of love and hope in my life now! Thank you very much Sister Tamera!

[@janethofmann1401]

How did I miss this one?! So amazing. Thank you! I feel like it’s the other half of Eyrings talk.

[@beargraham5245]

Amazing speech thank you 🙏

[@susanavaenuku1712]

So much awesomeness 🙏🏽

[@fourbirdstos]

I really appreciated this sister's comments. It made me feel like the Lord was seeing what I was going through, and thinking, and feeling, and wondering about. I loved the smile on her face and that she spoke from personal experience with the Savior's love. God bless her, and God bless all of us. May we choose to be happy and to see things through the eyes of Heaven so that we may be filled with this hope and joy with passeth all understanding. : D

[@MelePaasi]

I had the blessing of serving in Sydney when Tammy and her husband were serving as President. She always saw us with this zoomed vision she speaks of. I cried watching this because once again she has spoken God’s love into my life.

[@lovescole1]

Yes, beautiful talk. So needful.

[@JorgeandHisVideos]

Best message along with the prophets

[@TrumperToTheEnd]

I get the overall message, but her mother must be deceased in order for her to criticize her to the whole world like that. It goes back to the idea that everything is the mothers fault. We had this talk as our lesson Sunday and this gave others to criticize their mothers as well. I like the message, but I don’t like her attention story she began with.

[@estherlongmore9443]

She’s not criticizing her mother. She observed that her mom was worried about her, but her dad had a more eternal perspective which benefited her. I’m sorry people in your lesson took it as an excuse to criticize their mothers. That’s on them.

[@YTbkmac13]

I struggled with this one. Sister Runia seems so positive and energetic, but her message ironically discourages me. It seems like a popular self help book that teaches to wish goodness into our lives just by thinking it to be true. The logic of the doctrine doesn't work and it is not corroborated by the very prophets she quotes. All things will work out in the end? Really? Whatever we are worried about will be fine? Just like she said in her talk - she tells you want you want to hear. So when Moroni was lamenting the fall of his people, he should have been more hopeful and everything would work out for those folks in the end? Maybe if he hadn't turned them away like Sister Runia's poor mother. Clearly, Moroni didn't love them enough, or the right way, because things didn't turn out all right in the end! In the words of Sister Runia, He didnt' win, just like her mother. Moroni needed to be more permissive, like her father, because that's why she's so wonderful. What an irresponsible message. Our loved ones are not dependent upon our ability to love without ever pointing out concerns, but rather, they must rely on their own ability to love the Lord and make right choices. To message that all we have to do is think positive and choose the right ourselves, and that things we'll be fine is not doctrine that is based in truth. Is she asking us to say "All is well in zion, yeah, zion prospereth, yeah all is well?" I hope not. "... and thus the devil cheateth their souls." Also, why is she okay to judge my loved ones as being good? Look at this quote. "The greatest work we can do is with our loved ones." (Not bad to this point. But then ...) "who are good people, living in a wicked world." Wait. What? How does she know if our loved ones are good people? How does she know they aren't part of the wicked world? How can she make such sweeping and universal judgements? And as a church, doesn't that come across as self-righteous? Are our loved ones good because they are members? What possible good comes from us condemning our children as being universally good? How damaging! That is why we should not make such broad sweeping judgements? Don't we want them to repent? How can they repent if they are already good? I guess we can judge and condemn if such judgements bring a smile to their face. Or, again in Sister Runia's words, if we "tell them what they long to hear." Since when is flattery and avoiding truth good counsel? "For the wicked taketh the truth to be hard, for it cutteth them to the very center." But she says, if its going to hurt them, don't say it. Somehow, Sister Runia pitted helpful against hurtful, as if those ideas aren't or can't ever be compatible. These ideas are not and should not be either or. You can help and hurt someone. Don't we remember Elder Cristopherson's talk about the current bush? If I set someone's broken bone, won't it will hurt like crazy? But won't it also be helpful to them in the long run? She makes it sound like its one or the other. And in doing so, she condemns all those in the scriptures who call their loved ones to repentance. Did Nephi just not love his brothers enough, or the right way? If he'd been more hopeful and nice, like Sister Runia's father, would Laman and Lemuel have come around? So it's all his fault because he dared speak hurtful words to them? Didn't he know they didn't want to hear it? Maybe he should have let all that go? All that fuss from Nephi on the ship, it probably just drove those good young men away. Nephi is to blame for Laman and Lemuel's hard hearts. He made the gospel unbearable. So was he, or was he not speaking by the spirit when he said those hurtful words to his family? This talk would make you think he was in the wrong. Look - I'm all for being positive and hopeful, but this takes it to an extreme that the ideas are no longer rooted in reality. Which means it actually isn't hopeful at all, since it isn't real. There is nothing more discouraging than a message that has no ability to prop up the promises it promotes. That is what the scriptures call false hope. (They hoped in vain.) Not all of our loved ones will make choices that we like. And no matter how long Lehi stayed at the tree, it didn't always make a difference. We need to learn to be more like Heavenly Father, and love through weeping, even though we would all love to have everyone turn out great in the end. The great plan of salvation is at its essence, risky. Not all will come back, just because you live righteously. Don't you see how discouraging this is. This kind of talk puts the burden of child's salvation squarely on a parent's shoulders by claiming that if we love them enough and hope enough and have faith enough and stay by the tree, then they'll be fine. I'm not prepared to throw out all my scriptural heroes who could not save their children. Let's not forget what gospel we believe in. We can't even save ourselves, let alone our children. We need Christ. We need to point them to Christ. We don't do that by telling them what they long to hear. We don't do that by believing that everything will work out fine if we do our part. That thinking turns us into the Savior. That is not our role. That is the Saviors role. Yes - we should not be overbearing - good counsel from the scriptures. Yes - we should be Christlike in our dealing with loved ones. Also good counsel. But Jesus never gave counsel like what I heard in this talk. He never put the burden of salvation on parents. He never gave false hopes and promises. He warned. He cautioned. He cried repentance. He only made promises that were contingent on coming unto him. That is why this talk was discouraging to me. It implies and clearly states doctrines that do not have the power to endure or uphold the promises stated, regardless of the messages ability to assuage pain in the short term for those who are desperate for it.

[@janethofmann1401]

It’s clear you’re going through some really difficult things and trials. Remember they have a few minutes to get across the message they are prompted to share and can’t possibly address every facet of everything. For me this was exactly what I needed to hear and I’m grateful for it. I pray you will find the council and help you desire by prayer, faith and study. Blessings your way.

[@analyndouachi]

Please pray and talk to Heavenly Father about the struggles that you are going through….

[@thechristiangamer9140]

​@@janethofmann1401I agree. There are many aspects of the gospel that can't be covered in a quarter hour period of time. Because of how the world is, it's very hard to see things in a positive light but hope will always get us through. But if we lose hope, hope in Christ and hope in the gospel then we will not be able to get through the hard times.

[@christinaparks3686]

Wow this was such hurtful feedback against such a wonderful talk...it seems you missed the point entirely about zooming out and seeing the big picture...the overview effect as it was explained. I hope youre able to listen to the talk again or maybe a couple of times and get a better understanding of the message....

[@thelastenforcer]

This talk is from someone whose life is too good compared to those standing in the ruins of what was once their families.