Selective Attention: How To Make People Respect You

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For many men, Don Draper is the epitome of confidence. What most people don’t realize is that confidence actually comes in two flavors. There is the external confidence that you project, which can make closing deals, making friends or seducing happen more naturally. There is also the internal confidence you feel which is how comfortable you are in any given situation.
In this video, we’re going to analyze what Don can teach us about both levels of confidence, and how mastering each level can take you from being nervous to completely confident in any situation.
⏰TIMESTAMPS⏰
0:41 - Lesson #1: His relaxed body language.
2:58 - Lesson #2: Don is non-reactive.
5:18 - Lesson #3: He doesn’t try to convince other people.
6:57 - Lesson #4: The belief that he will be okay, no matter what.
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#DonDraper #CharismaOnCommand #Confidence
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[@SeanLunny]

Believing that no matter what happens you’re going to be fine anyway is always a great mindset to have

[@mohammedbedewy9102]

Exactly!! You made my day sir !!

[@YodaSama0]

Sean Lunny that’s could be true but could also be really bad

[@lorenzejay3296]

I tell myself this everyday and I genuinely believe everything will workout

[@clubstep8244]

To help yourself feel fine even in heated situations: "zoom out" a bit and imagine all the life that happens around you and realize how little you mean in all that, there is nothing that's going to hurt you

[@alcatraz2627]

Alan watts explained that quite well, " you must understand we come out of this World, not into it. Therefore we are part of the natural World like the animals, the trees and the waves of the ocean and the clouds. Now have have you ever seen a cloud that was too big or too small? Have you ever seen a cloud move in the wrong direction? The same goes for humans, in zen practice you are thought to regard yourself as a cloud moveing along in the skies..."

[@pinkyster9384]

How to nail your interview: 1. Avoid eye contact at all costs 2. Rest your feet on the interviewers desk to assert dominance 3. Wait for 20 seconds staring at them before answering to a question 4. Walk out of the room calmly after refusing to take the job

[@maxx4944]

dont forgot to cry

[@fsb4561]

I laughed so hard 😂😂😂 im dying here man

[@DocPegLegRed]

Hahahaha

[@MrRiveting]

5. Light up a cigarette indoors and smoke.

[@redmondandkrista9475]

@@MrRiveting hahahahahaha

[@danfordchodokufa838]

"Believing that no matter what happens you’re going to be ok" is an incredibly liberating idea. I love this

[@gabriellepundsack3308]

I always tell myself, "No one is going to kill you if (I fail/can't pay a bill/etc.).

[@keremdemircan4203]

it is basically stoicism bro

[@harshsunitapancholi15]

1. Sit relaxed and a little lean back that makes people come out to you. 2. Be non-reactive, and react less at times when handling pressure. 3. Speak slowly and use pauses correctly. 4. You will be okay no matter what.

[@user-hq4zb6yp5b]

She broke up with me. I told her I was grateful for the good times we shared. No begging, no pleading, go and be well. Moved on. Did us both a BIG favor. 😂

[@altonology1134]

Practice keeping your word everyday you’ll really gain confidence. Every time you say you’re gonna do something and don’t do it, your self-esteem diminishes no matter how meaningless the task may seem. Take your word very serious.

[@GaZonk100]

love it

[@yoshibald8958]

thx

[@climbbmilc93]

I go by this! Especially just for doing life admin: - Telling yourself you’ll make your bed in the morning before showering. And doing it! - telling yourself you’ll have breakfast before 10:00. And doing it!

[@altonology1134]

@@climbbmilc93 Exactly! Little routine tasks like that are extremely important for keeping your confidence in check. There was one point in my life where I followed through with literally everything that I said I would do religiously and after a while, it felt like I owned the world. “Idk” and “maybe” were no longer in my vocabulary. You start to subconsciously trust in yourself more and more by KNOWING you’ll accomplish whatever you say you’re going to do (AKA confidence).

[@anwarshariq3411]

Preach 100

[@db-7531]

True confidence can only be achieved via lightning McQueen crocs

[@richardjohnson7379]

Notice: no other clothing can be worn or it won’t work

[@dorian_tihi5869]

Hey Beatiful people, I Just Started my own Channel Inspired by David and I just wanted to let you know. It might be Interesting for you and i would appreciate it if you would show some support. See you there ;)

[@mrmark8603]

A, er...friend was looking for some. Where would I, er he, get those?

[@jay0071]

Crispyyy

[@isaacwebb20]

Epic gamer moment

[@briandtnguyen]

As a practicing attorney, I often remind myself to pause while speaking with a judge or a jury. It creates suspense. But more importantly, it actually allows me to hear my own thoughts and feel my feelings. Pausing also gives the other person time to process everything I just said. I would add that confidence is a two-way street. I find that if I practice active listening when I speak with people and really make space for them, they open up and we then mutually instill confidence in one another. Confidence doesn’t always have to be a competition.

[@mosesrichard394]

i m in Law school.. i will start practicing your way

[@user-xo1ez7zf1t]

Amazing advice

[@roman8197]

you're an attorney shut up

[@SkippyBrown]

I feel like a big part of Don's character is that even HE has his own issues with self-confidence, but he never let's people see that. When he does, that's when we start to see the layers peel back and Don's true self starts to show. It's really all about how you project yourself to the world and those around you.

[@berkguler5339]

blessed words

[@stephcooper1111]

BEST comment yet- nailed it!

[@dominickdean2873]

Not necessarily the point. The point is to have true enough confidence in yourself to be able to be vulnerable in front of others, and not in a poor me way.

[@1023kdawg]

And then you realize that real confidence and real freedom is not having to "project" yourself to anyone .

[@kayleighc1681]

An even bigger part of Don's character is that he's a manipulative gaslighting narcissist, definitely not someone to look up to at all

[@randomappalachian4635]

Expectations: Don Draper Reality: Michael Scott

[@captainswan3079]

😂😂

[@portman3950]

a

[@redduckto]

fkn underrated..

[@MicahBuzanANIMATION]

100% accurate

[@cribbie6327]

Michael Scarn! Threat level midnight

[@ldb6382]

Confidence is literally a mindset that you can force.

[@Poop-sr9sn]

Explain

[@jonnycpardoe]

Agree on it being mindset 100%

[@arkarmiller70]

Dude you are so right. I was a shy guy but today my crush offered me a snack and I used to decline the offer and today I said to her" Yeah sure why not" in front of everyone.

[@jogolord8122]

1 million subscribers with no videos That’s a good start. Keep the mindset you’ll do good.

[@ellorco991]

You can cultivate a mindset though, being good at things or doing things until You’re good at them is a way to cultivate confidence, the fact is you have to have experiences, good and bad and learn from them, true confidence IMO is having certainty in everything you do

[@AA-qb7ni]

I get anxiety going to college every single day. I'm not happy with how i feel on the inside and out. But this helped and I'm working on myself now. My goal is to leave the house feeling confident and good about myself.

[@sil_spatafora3886]

how’s it going?

[@oscoe]

Hang in there…..be kind to yourself for each small thing you achieve where you overcome anxiety. Hope things are getting better.

[@bobbye4731]

Start working out. It’ll do wonders

[@Dr.HouseMD]

You gotta watch the show. Don is terrified or nervous in 1/4 of these situations. Not to mention his character is literally about an insecure person who imitates a persona to fit in.

[@user-hq4zb6yp5b]

Don is akin to a Deep Cover Espionage Agent with a totally crafted false persona.

[@thefutureisnow7300]

Don is good at disguising his fears

[@Arthanlis-Orthodox]

Hey, I would like to watch, what is the name of the show please ?

[@Dr.HouseMD]

@@Arthanlis-Orthodox Mad Men

[@Arthanlis-Orthodox]

@@Dr.HouseMD Thank you sir

[@josephrutchik5777]

"You'll stop worrying that someone will reject you because you'll never reject yourself." That is brilliant! Well done!!!

[@Christian-tf6ol]

Indeed I agree💯. They said that "Don't be the first person to say no to yourself"

[@g.a.d6988]

"Who do you believe in? I believe in me.. I love me"- SGP

[@kevinflanagan4711]

Love this

[@Sergiuss555]

your IQ must be negative

[@Faye-el1bz]

Who cares about rejection Its way more important to become youre best authentic self

[@maxxmaximum3467]

* Be relaxed - Spread out (standing, sitting being spread) - Move freely around - People have to work for attention - Selective eye contact ( give attention when making a point ; if the other person is doing it, then stare) * Be Non-reactive - Stay silent under pressure ( give pauses to think) - Don’t fidget under pressure * Dont try to convince people - Frame yourself as a equal partner ( in a negotiation; You are screening them as much as they are screening you) - Be willing to walk away ( not emotionally; if its clear that it signifies your confidence; Looks we’re not a match, wish you all the best) * Believe that you’ll be okay - Even if you do something that will prove a loss, be confident and know that you wont ever lose your own trust.

[@kandle2507]

Thanks man

[@GM-dg6mj]

Thanks man

[@dfghxdfghsdsxdhdftx803]

Thank you.

[@CyberMew]

Saved me ten minutes thanks!!

[@Ruzal]

Thanks

[@davidharler9149]

also gotta say, the 4th tip really hits home. Specifically, love the line "...and you may begin to even look forward to the situations that stressed you out"

[@clairebaujard4519]

That last point about true, unshakeable confidence in yourself is absolutely golden. That's what it all boils down to. Brilliantly put, thank you!

[@CelineCatalina98]

"do you want fries with that?" *20 second pause* "yes"

[@aptonymic3014]

(i had to think fast)

[@qambi1]

hehehe

[@cheerfulcrumb4540]

that would be a fckn alpha move i reckon

[@SageVaughn]

LMAO

[@LetsTacoBoutWine]

LMAO

[@addisonjones3795]

I have always struggled with social anxiety and self esteem. I used these on my family at a party with my aunts and cousins. For the first time I felt confident. I was talking and making everyone laugh with my stories and comments. As soon as I got home I started crying with relief. I hope that I can keep applying this tricks in the future. Thank you will never be enough, But thank you.

[@jonathanregan5682]

Wish you the best man.

[@theMadZakuPilot]

Good luck man

[@ollie2244]

I feel you, it's really tough.

[@dannymontaino700]

That's so awesome. I don't know you but I'm proud of you. Sending you lots of love

[@keshavdawra12]

Good job!

[@qualityquotes229]

“It's not the load that breaks you down, it's the way you carry it.” ― Lou Holtz

[@user-hq4zb6yp5b]

❤😊

[@nerdalert6578]

We need this curriculum in today's schools & make it mandatory for all students unfortunately this is something schools never teach us & as a 25 Yr old I can vouch for all adults when I say your degrees, grades & education doesn't matter if you're not able to express yourself. Until you're confident in you own skin you can never be successful.Period..!

[@arioux]

“Would you like your receipt?” *20 second pause “no.-I-I mean yes”

[@motivatoraligator6]

😂😂

[@undefeated3257]

Omfg 🤣😂🤣

[@moto-physique9270]

😂😂😂

[@gusd8659]

LOL

[@dendaungnualkhae5144]

😂

[@ZacharyLaid]

Confidence is built by doing something over and over until you prove to yourself that you’re actually good at it.

[@MrMacBig273]

it's the skill you trained is - lying to yourself - does it would make you confident at anything ? cause you're sure you can do it ?

[@ASLUHLUHCE]

Do you know the definition of confidence?

[@MrMacBig273]

@@ASLUHLUHCE Do you know how the human mind works ?

[@amaracea]

Zachary is 100% right. Don’t be putting words in his comment that aren’t there.

[@ASLUHLUHCE]

​@@MrMacBig273 You also don't know what confidence means. You get s feeling of confidence/self-assurance by appreciating your own abilities or qualities, and not necessarily being a master of any particular skill. For instance, one could be confident at public speaking, but not necessarily be good at it.

[@cscs88]

I love that his pick up line w that nurse is "my name is Don". Jon Hamm absolutely crushed this role.

[@IsraelGarciaRivera]

You made me remember one of my favorite episodes of Mad Men... That hug Don gives to the other man, it is just emotional 100%. Deep.

[@prodmarquese]

getting detached from reality made me the most confident person ive ever known lol, the key is not caring guys, your fears controlling you, if you overcome them then your anxiety is gone.. everyone is too invested in their own life, they dont care if your hair's not that good

[@Anthony-dw3jb]

I can vouch for this. In my younger days I used to not give 2 shits what somebody would think about me if I said this or did that, I just didn't care and every conversation/interaction I had with anyone just felt good and satisfying. These days I'm clouded by social anxiety and it's hard to enjoy being out and around people because I constantly think about how the other person is going to view me but coming across this video is reconnecting me with my past philosophy of not giving 2 shits and I have to say it feels good and thats how I know not caring really works lol. Care about what matters to you, not to them, that is the key.

[@prodmarquese]

@@Anthony-dw3jb Exactly, once you have control over your fears, you'll have no limits

[@dante93nero]

@@prodmarquese Yes and no. Because even if you have no fears there is a difference in appearing confident and being arrogant. Whilist I do understand your point what someone like Don does is project confidence while not needing to be confident himself if that makes sense. There are subtle moviments you can do that swing a conversation in your favor and for someone with Don's knowledge he knows what clients want and needs.

[@sarthaknagar6349]

How do you detach from reality? Imagine you are to give a presentation in front of 100 people and you are nervous and anxious as hell, your heart is beating fast, at that situation how would you do that?

[@dante93nero]

@@sarthaknagar6349 the second you greet the audience. Right than and there you focus on what your are presenting and not on the audience itself

[@GamerDwarfTR]

Watched this with my dog Now he’s giving speeches about confidence.

[@SebAnders]

You could say he's now... Top Dog.

[@brodemfamalam7178]

Guess you could call him a dawg now

[@3zooz17]

@@brodemfamalam7178 guess you can call him snoop dog😂😂😂😂

[@anasubia5856]

😬

[@BlackDiamond2718]

Second in command to snowball

[@zig8925]

It's about balancing when to be open and when not to be. You don't want to be telling the wrong people your weak points, but you also don't want to be a bottle that looks perfect but shatters after some time, because of the pressure it's holding. Recently I've not been balancing it properly. I've been too focused on saying the perfect thing. I've not been patient, I've been wanting instant confidence. This is cause I want to feel the same confidence I did in the past.

[@jamesboaz4787]

For those who don't know or needed a reminder the show is MAD MEN

[@mglynn4450]

I once saw Cesar Milan live and he said "Calm is power" and that was the strongest piece of advice I've ever heard.

[@amaracea]

A friend told me that once when we were kids. We aren’t friends anymore because first I forgot about that, and then he forgot about that, and now we’re probably never going to talk to each other again. I forgive him now, it’s been a while, but knowing him I doubt he’s forgiven me. I don’t know if he’s capable of forgiveness. Or any real feelings, for that matter.

[@Julian-bq9qv]

@@amaracea so very sad. Words spoken in haste or in anger can never be taken back. If both parties are willing and committed, then a friendship can recover and endure; but anything less is like trying to build half a bridge.

[@jamietodd2560]

Calm means the other person cannot affect you. They might try because if they can make you react then it shows that _they_ have the power to make you react. But if you remain cool and collected no matter what happens, then you retain all of that power, and actually steal some of theirs, because now you've both seen their failure.

[@Julian-bq9qv]

@@jamietodd2560 well said!!!

[@ryanw8510]

Be like Don Draper if you want to pick up beautiful women...be like Cesar Milan if you want to pick up dogs!

[@philiphaycock3845]

All I got from this is that the narrator has a crush on this actor.

[@RageAZA]

hey we all have our man crushes. a one sided bromance..

[@_BhagavadGita]

Or perhaps you're just projecting your feelings onto the narrator?

[@32alltheway]

Pretty much. nothing like basing your own confidence on a drunken, philandering, identity stealing, morally bankrupt pretty boy. moral of the story, be pretty!

[@zoulzopan]

You don't?

[@hannahmadden3573]

What a Hamm.

[@LifestyleofBeauty]

Learning how to control emotion under pressure is a priceless life skill not only for confidence!! 💖💖

[@HawksNestYT]

Have you ever done a video on charisma and confidence demonstrated by non attractive people? That would be intriguing. As for example on this video, around 1:30, he’s leaned back and looks comfortable, but a larger person would be getting a double chin and can come across “different” because of that. That’s obviously a small thing, but it got me thinking of how every video I’ve seen relates to those that already have a natural physical attractiveness that makes “mental” attractiveness maybe not “easier” but at least amplified

[@erikig]

Good point, maybe watching videos of guys that weren’t traditionally attractive like Churchill, Idi Amin etc (and the actors that have played them in movies). Notice what they are doing when they seem their most confident and charismatic. 😊

[@Je.rone_]

4:30 *Slowing things down and thinking before reacting Is something I find extremely effective*

[@amaracea]

Yeah. It’s really difficult when you’re trained growing up and your whole life that you’re dirt and everyone else is better than you - meaning, hey, respond promptly to people and don’t waste their time. It’s more valuable than yours. When you realize you’re making them wait, you feel like your face is on fire and your hands get all greasy and your chest starts trying to kill you and you can tell they’re hearing how unbelievably loud and shallow your breathing suddenly is and that sweat on your forehead is “this close” to getting in your eye and you forget what you were trying to figure out to say

[@Angeck]

@@amaracea Do this 3 times. First 2 times it feels terrible and difficult, and at the 3rd time it starts getting more comfortable. Also some people would be surprised at how first and second impressions don't matter and people forget how you've been in the past. The point being, go and make some mistakes, It's good for you.

[@capo328]

@@amaracea I know that feeling

[@rickjohnson1719]

I find it annoying because i dont think when i speak so i flow. I think by talking so its aweful waiting for other people to answer.

[@Je.rone_]

@@rickjohnson1719 Depending on the complexity of the situation/conversation I think one can choose to just flow, a stream of consciousness so to speak, in lieu of well-thoughtout speech.

[@Andy-lj9pr]

1)Relaxed Body language 2)Selective eye contact 3)Non-Reactiveness/Silence/Patient response 4)Framing the situation 5)No matter what... you will be okay.

[@misty_mouse987]

you will never reject yourself... love this

[@iloveas999too4]

1.Have a relax body language and more freely in every environment. Have selective eye contact and make eye contact when your doing a main point. Do not over react and stay non reactive. Remain in silence to think or when confused. SLOW DOWN 2.Make yourself seem as equals with others. Do not get angry and stay calm 3.believe that you will be okay in every situation no matter what

[@poozizzle]

Audrey Hepburn was asked how she seemed so poised all the time, she said she slows down. I started talking that to heart in stressful situations, and it's worked. I feel myself getting panicky in a social situation and then just walk slower, talk slower, allows your thoughts to slow down and become less reactive.

[@ErikaK]

Yes ! Love that! It gives you the time to think and analyse the situation. Also taking deep breaths can help to manage our emotions ♡

[@gabyperez1123]

Wow, I should try that.

[@ErikaK]

@@gabyperez1123 :) yes, before reacting to a certain situation, before responding, taking a deep breath can help you channel your emotions and think the things through. Taking deep breaths can help you release anxiety, stress and even anger.

[@tripslikstar]

I worked in security. I always told my guards that when it gets crazy, slow down. Simply your list, take a deep breathe and control what you can. Seem to work as me and my team were very successful.

[@ErikaK]

@@tripslikstarthat's great! it really really helps Have a wonderful week !

[@OMGSHEENA]

Realizing that no matter what happens, I'll be okay, is exactly how I survived my childhood. I used to stress so much then after so many dramatic plot twists, I realized if I survived all that, I will survive whatever else comes my way and that's when I stopped stressing as much. I hadn't really connected it with confidence before but I can see the connection now. Interesting. 🤔

[@bbx7739]

Same here. I am the only one who is not afraid to speak up, regardless of their position. After you collect your guts to stand up to your parents, you have no fear standing up to anyone :)

[@pastelteaaniiii]

Truth.

[@bernhardsonn7758]

Uf

[@fredricmontana5420]

In the end, most people wont survive. 🙂

[@lyrebird9749]

So sorry to hear what happened to you. But have faith in yourself, you are strong and capable. You have survived. You will survive. Peace.

[@sexyrexy6358]

Wow! So focused, engaging and productive. Just before I get out of bed, I visualize and feel in every part of my body, the life I want. I hold those feelings for at least 20 seconds and everything I do is driven by that vision. This is the best cotent I have seen on YT so far. Great job.

[@galactusholmes]

This video... I’ve seen quite a few of yours. This one really hit home for me and confidence felt and projected has not been an issue for me for decades. Well done

[@wearedying]

This is the first video on this channel I've seen. I just hope I don't forget to implement the tips!

[@michalpiskorski9731]

Two rules which I have applied a long time ago and have improved my life completely. - Pause and think about what you're about to say, and then say it, always. - Sometimes it is better to not say anything.

[@aljack1979]

What I learnt from my military career, 'only fools rush in'

[@Wayne--O]

.

[@mikeymorrison272]

Definitely agree

[@praesidium4278]

I need to do this but to,do such great things,I need to destroy my schizophrenic version of myself and then I can be free and in touch with reality

[@DrJonTam]

0:16 Two types of confidence: External and Internal 0:43 1: Relaxed body language 3:03 2: Be non-reactive 5:24 3: Don’t try to convince people 7:04 4: Believe that you will always be ok

[@itsjayjaehere864]

Thankss

[@bobbybarnes6888]

Appreciate it

[@urielgladney1746]

Huh h B b 😅😊b 0:53 b

[@GustavoSilva-ny8jc]

The ending is AMAZING, throughout the whole video i was like "yeah, okay but that's just a persona, just an act - and when i was younger and starting self development i thought that THIS was what meant to be confident but it's far from true self belief and conviction, the place where true confidence comes from. So, cool tips but it's not what i need righ-" then lesson 4 started. And you nailed it. It's so fundamental to stress this, to know where confidence, self-belief, comes from. Great, great video.

[@joekool5005]

Madmen is a great series worth watching on so many levels.

[@camj256]

If only real people were scripted to react perfectly to everything I say.

[@VoidVerses]

Stfu punk

[@CoolDrifty]

@@VoidVerses nah he's right. you can do everything right in a conversation and the other person will still be awkward and antisocial.

[@VoidVerses]

@@CoolDrifty you didn't get the joke... oh well 🤣

[@CoolDrifty]

Jesus Eduardo well I’ve heard better jokes

[@VoidVerses]

@@CoolDrifty no, you heard easier jokes..

[@lordvoldemort1985]

Stop worrying about always needing to say the right thing because you think the other person or the group might reject you, because you know that you will never reject yourself --- this really hit man, ty for this video

[@synaesthesia4183]

Same here!

[@ssjliano9971]

It’s crazy how simple stuff like this is but the way we were programmed growing up made shot like this never go through my head

[@seanwilliams480]

Another factor in why Don is so darn good at all of this is that he is a fictional character with a team of 12 writers controlling every situation, every reaction, every move, every word of every character in every scene. It's easy to make someone god like when for all intents and purposes the character actually is god like, with every aspect of every scene carefully designed and orchestrated by a huge team of writers, sound people, lighting people, costume designers, set directors, on and on, plus the director and other actors setting him up constantly project that great Don Draper image. It takes more to be Don Draper than just confidence. No one is Don Draper.

[@dvirdeez]

You’re right, but remember that characters are developed from real life experiences/stories. Writers take personalities and character traits of real people and create a fictional character. It’s not as if Dons character is albeit non relatable, he is very relatable and there’s a lot to learn from Don Draper

[@MotiveVideoBook]

"you will be okay no matter what" yes this is powerful

[@ryshlovanoodo7591]

Not to me lol.

[@vutrung6874]

@@ryshlovanoodo7591 :))

[@sentvero2025]

Looks > Confidence

[@ryshlovanoodo7591]

I should have died in my thirty's.

[@mihaiioantabacaru7758]

"My name is Don" what a great pickup line, I'll definitely use it!

[@dogguyful]

My name is Bond, James Bond

[@petezah4597]

@@dogguyful my name is Don, Don Don

[@dogguyful]

@@petezah4597 Hahaha 😂

[@tinockovietea2470]

Don Dada on the down low

[@MundoGamesDo]

@@petezah4597 Tava aqui no baile escutando aquele som

[@goshahello1500]

I watched this video a few years back and I forgot that after I applied the steps it completely changed how everyone around me viewed me seemingly overnight props to this channel

[@bambooflute2589]

07:01 is everything. Very powerful stuff. I’ll meditate on this for as long as it takes, and get rejected and fail over and over for as many times as it takes to internalize that. Thank you so much.

[@alexd0103]

How to be confident Step 1: steal someone else’s personality and life

[@reyjoson7895]

Alex Step1: migrate Step 2: steal someone else’s personality and life

[@matttheamerican3766]

Not funny. Dudes actually do this crap

[@CaliburovX4]

Rey Joson Step three: Profit.

[@bobbye7353]

He isn't talking about his personality at all. This is all about behavior. How mature successful men behave.

[@tcnotrvlr]

stealing someone else's personality and life? Wack! You'll end up like Edward Norton's character at the end of The Italian Job movie from 2003- A no originality, unconfident, LOSER that can't decide who they Actually are.

[@VinnySmiles01]

Let’s be real here, most of Don’s confidence comes from the fact that he drinks so much. Drunk people are just more confident no matter what.

[@seconds-js7pf]

Because they arent constantly worrying about consequences and living in the moment

[@robertbelyea5767]

Yep. No matter what there's always a drink to cure what ails ya.

[@Yjkishke]

If only it were that easy

[@bighands69]

Don is not confident because he drinks. That is just pure nonsense. He is confident because he does not actually care about most of the things that shape other people. He does not care about money in the way other people does, he does not care what others think and above all he is willing to just try. Everybody knows a Don Draper. That does not mean he is a good person morality is something different.

[@lf2208]

Don Draper's confidence comes from the fact that he is a character in a TV show, and he is only written into scenes where he is, and can be, confident.

[@KSJpeep]

Thank you so much I really needed this, I was just rejected and was so scared to go to school because I knew that people would confront me about it but again thank you so much!

[@AbeNXC]

I’ve lived my life so far by the adage “this too shall pass”… idk why it stuck with me so hard the first time I heard it but it’s literally how I operate my life on the daily now. This saying has gotten me through countless excruciating physical AND emotional pain over the years and I really believe it’s changed me for the better

[@lewiskori9426]

I agree with you. The day I learned about the hedonic treadmill was the day my life changed for the better. Deep down I always know that everything is temporary.

[@fbmw98]

This channel went from how to act charismatically to how to fix your life principles and improve your life drastically in less then 3 years

[@thedogofchucknorris]

Ferrel Brendan than*

[@AutumnOnFire]

Is that not one in the same?

[@fbmw98]

@@thedogofchucknorris corrected, thanks mate

[@fbmw98]

@@AutumnOnFire Having a principle will result in consistency and makes people automatically charismatic.

[@paatrick90]

@@fbmw98 The biggest thing that happened this week was when someone said "thanks" to a grammar correction in a KZbin, instead of getting triggered. The tiniest thing ever, but I felt inspired by this. Good mindset.

[@tanishmishra9152]

The only reason he drapes his hand over the adjacent chair so often is because his name is Don Draper and I cannot be convinced otherwise

[@stevekemp7091]

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 best comment ever on any video in the world

[@TheDoomer666]

ah man, English joke, I don't get it

[@stevekemp7091]

@@TheDoomer666 you speak very good England sir

[@darksunrise37]

nooo dons drapes his hand because hes confident broo he feels comfortable with himself and his environment brooo you gotta hear me out bro it’s nota cuz his last names draper brooooooo

[@mochalatte8878]

@@darksunrise37 it’s a joke-

[@dhaoracle]

This is by far the best in the series cause it doesn't look to change anyone just tell them to own it

[@intrakitproductions]

True confidence it's just being yourself in any situation and speaking your mind when needed

[@broste2121]

"I pretended to be somebody I wanted to be until I became that person" Cary Grant

[@Khriss98]

you gotta hit rock bottom first before truly being confident

[@ASJacob]

Been there, I wish that on everyone who wants to become their greatest self! The darker the weather, the better the man!

[@shakaabs7102]

Sh.sudaysi.quraan.baqara.

[@cecee3480]

Hitting rock bottom doesn't make you confident it makes you ruthless.

[@kkibela]

That whole.. Im going to be fine is what really does it.. And the no ducks given that comes out of rock bottom is what makes people relentlessly unegotistically authentic in every interaction..and relaxed biddy language.. That's confidence.. And it's unique to everyone.. Best to find your own rather than copy anyone partly.. Just comes off as creepy and untrustworthy.

[@owennbeats]

how do I hit rock bottom

[@xw6475]

This is just amazing!! Your channel is my favourite on KZbin. thank you so much Charlie!! Please keep them coming

[@Gilroben]

Your videos are awesome! I'm loving them so much I'm watching some that doesn't seem so much applicable to me. Still I get some gems on them. The advice to internalise the belief that everything is gonna be ok hit me hard. I have a fear of being alone and I'm solving this with therapy, but your explanation made total sense to me. Really thinking and believing that would solve almost all the social awkwardness I usually have.

[@BuioPestato]

Don is drunk most of the time, that's what it is

[@kentuckyfriedchildren5385]

It's not a package, you can get his positive aspects without his problems

[@dylangarcia5803]

no he just gets a sip but never drunk

[@olog222]

lmfao yep

[@flobbertop4278]

I’m aiming for that...

[@ShushaSofia]

My temporary solution until I get it right

[@mistermister2291]

Confidence isn't about getting other peoplr to agree with you or accept you, it's about living your life without worry. I think that a lot of the reasons people watch this channel come from wanting social acceptance. Ironically, that means that for many of us (myself included), the biggest obstical to overcome in being charismatic, is what drove us to try to be in the first place.

[@billthebax5578]

Vael Ryker well put. When my son was about 4th grade I was listening to him and his buddy's sitting around talking. (My son was born with bi-lateral club feet) one of the boys told him, so and so is faster than you. His answer, big deal everyone is faster than me. Too cool, that ended right there. That kid tried to step on him, but found nothing to step on.

[@genghisgalahad8465]

I'd always thought of Charisma on Command as often the Don Draper University! A good thing for focus and attention and intention!

[@advancetotabletop5328]

5:45: “He is screening them, as much as they are screening him.” We’re landlords and have to do this with applicants. Thanks for the videos!

[@SCRKT007]

So basically accepting oneself is the very key factor on being confident, kinda mind blowing that it also goes around by the famous saying "once you start believing in yourself, anything is possible".

[@jns08d]

This is SO TRUE, 5 years ago I was a super insecure college student, got some therapy and now I'm more in love with myself than ever.

[@osse1n]

Internal confidence can also be called *SELF-ESTEEM* - Ultimately, it boils down to mastering your own psychology and understanding that you have unlimited powers

[@Bennevisie]

Don Draper had self esteem? You sure?

[@Infinite_exhilaration]

VariableVision Absolutely! confidence isn’t something someone always radiates, it fluctuates, not everyone always feel amazing every second of every day, Don Draper definitely has had confidence at some point in his life, and may be feeling that exact way right now, it’s something you cultivate that takes time, so your answer is a bit obvious, sometimes you feel confident, sometimes not, everyone has had confidence at one point in their life

[@lukaseckart8583]

If ones self-esteem is based on the believe that one has unlimited powers, one will at some point fail and then be forced to question it. This is far from mastering ones psychology I guess... Knowing ones limits, being confident about the potentual one has and honest about all of it seems like self-esteem that is way more natural. Just my thougt on it tho..

[@Bennevisie]

@@Infinite_exhilaration Don Draper definitely had confidence. But I would argue his self destructive behaviour (alcoholism, serial cheating on his wife, constant lying) is rather a sign of lack of self esteem. One should not confuse self esteem with confidence. One runs much deeper and the other is more superficial and ego-centric.

[@Infinite_exhilaration]

VariableVision I’m a contradiction because I agree and disagree with you. You should never mix self esteem with confidence, however... people’s behavior, it changes over time, take Robert Downey Jr by example, his life was going essentially nowhere, and he made a decision to completely change the course of his life, and arguably kick started the MCU. Now... I’m not talking that big of a change, but he could of been known for binge drinking 4 months ago, and has that stigma, but 3 weeks ago, without us knowing, he made the decision to stop drinking, or drink less and less, so... it’s very difficult in my opinion to judge someone on their past behavior when change is just one decision away, and your argument may be people don’t change, and it’s a possibility like most people they are basing that statement from their own personal experience. Today he could of made a decision to change everything around. The truth is we don’t know. It’s the same as having a best friend always hung out in Highschool, you graduated, moved to a different state, visited him 3 years later, you can be a completely different person, so much so he doesn’t even recognize you

[@Lalahotwater]

When you keep your word to your self you gain the mindset of knowing and trusting yourself to act /“react” as necessary in any situation, bc your body and intuition go based on how you carry yourself, and then life is more intriguing bc your body trusts your mind and vise versa so you just “do it”

[@willy4129]

Today, in hopes of attracting attention from my crush, I made several jokes in class and everyone laughed including the teacher! Thanks for giving me confidence. I'm still getting there...

[@nathanthenewbie8325]

Proud of you bro and dont be afraid to get rejected

[@iampaulwadsworth]

Building self-confidence will change your life. Have an amazing day.

[@stevenorfolk7008]

100% truth

[@wgaule]

You can't change your life, it only happens once.

[@TheAbrahamHD]

No, YOU have an amazing day.

[@wgaule]

@@TheAbrahamHD Shut up dummy!

[@Elias___]

No

[@EL1T3xFaTe]

DO a tommy shelby from Peaky blinders confidence/dominating a situation breakdown! most intimidating without trying character in any show (sorry tywin)

[@ArtdeStoicisme]

BY ORDER OF THE FOOKIN PEAKY BLINDERS

[@tylerdurden8640]

FOOK YES

[@redweather6315]

YES. I get intimidated through the screen even tho hes a good guy.

[@CarDrifter007]

"I am Thomas Fookin Shelby."

[@Stophurtingmelol]

Bump

[@empirestobuild]

Good points raised but remember that this is a trained, professional actor, not naturally as shown in the movies. To be this type of confident takes a great deal more than just trying, doing or acting, but becoming that character in every way. Keep that in mind when trying, faking, doing or acting a part in front of others when such a character isn't your own natural self in everyday normal life.

[@genxx2724]

Jon Hamm is a great actor. I saw him cooking on a talk show. He doesn’t walk, move, or gesture like Don Draper at all! He’s a totally different type.

[@awakentruth1116]

I have theory about actors... not all, but some. They get so good at becoming (acting) another person they may be tempted to identify as that character in real life. And they get so good at the character that they lose themselves... sometimes intentionally. This could cause much anxiety and suffering. I'm sure we'll never really know but it might explain why in spite of fame and fortune some are secretly very unhappy people

[@empirestobuild]

@@awakentruth1116 ...that's a very good point.

[@HelloWorldGoodbye]

My ex was like this, it’s pretty amazing how everyone melted in their hands. It gets bad when you want to leave them, people like this are narcissistic.

[@ziadmatwi8982]

Instructions unclear, drank titanic volumes of whiskey and cheated on wife

[@timaden3916]

Call that Roger 😂😂😂😂

[@DkGrassyKnoll]

The doctor treatment

[@timaden3916]

@@DkGrassyKnoll i loved that episode

[@nicholasgendreau1297]

But did you do it with confidence

[@TheDomain16]

You're almost there.

[@ns3938]

Being brought up in a loving and supportive environment and being physically attractive are the most important contributors to confidence.

[@njhd9923]

What if I told u that even with those 2 things u could still not be confident 🤔

[@dhiadridi4062]

Definitely wrong answer

[@dorian_tihi5869]

Hey Beatiful people, I Just Started my own Channel Inspired by David and I just wanted to let you know. It might be Interesting for you and i would appreciate it if you would show some support. See you there ;)

[@manessuarezserantes9269]

The best part pf all pf this is that he is an actor and is doing all of this cause of studying people like this, what a performance

[@realtorrasheeddubai]

Every day is another chance to get stronger, to eat better, to live healthier, and to be the best version of you. Grant C

[@afonsolucas2219]

How to be like Don Draper: Step 1: When in doubt, remain absolutely silent Step 2: When asked about your past give vague and open ended answers Step 3: Have a great name Step 4: Look fantastic in a suit, look fantastic in casual wear, look fantastic in anything. Sound good. Smell good. Kiss good. Strutt around with supreme confidence. Take 6 hour lunches. Disappear for weeks at a time! Lie to everyone about everything and most importantly... Drink and smoke constantly. Basically... Be Don Draper

[@bohdanrohachenko7650]

And die from a liver failure due to constantly smoking and drinking.

[@afonsolucas2219]

Guys, this is a sketch from SNL with Jon Hamm. It's perfect go watch it.

[@evindrews]

step 5: crumble as a human being

[@binal-flecki2387]

*Boss asks me something* *Stays absolutely silent*

[@afonsolucas2219]

@@binal-flecki2387 Boss: ... You're promoted.

[@chloer5065]

There’s a reason alcohol is called liquid courage.

[@RatedxDmnd]

😂😂 spot on

[@Greg-nq4dj]

Yes sir that's old time medicine right there ain't no stress balls ordered from the therapist at two sessions a week but hey whatever works for you that's what counts no matter what era your from

[@Greg-nq4dj]

One drink ain't enough Jack you better make it three

[@neopabo]

Fixing problems builds your personality. Alcohol destroys it.

[@spikeybug1]

It's also called liquid jackass

[@badassv7875]

It was a rough day, watching this video made me fell better. Thank you.

[@BimmerWon]

I’m going to try propping my feet on the desk for my next job interview to show that I’m confident.

[@TakeBackYourMind997]

If you spend time getting to know yourself, and learn to love and accept that person then you strengthen the most important relationship of your life, the one you have with yourself. If that relationship is solid then you always have an inner safe haven no matter what is going on around you. That self love and understanding allows you to stay true to yourself in every situation, that is the deepest form of confidence.

[@percyvalle921]

True

[@JoseSantos-el8nj]

Yes but also improving that old self version of you is necessary sometimes, not only accepting it, doing something about if you feel unhappy about certain aspects of yourself

[@marcschox4769]

@@JoseSantos-el8nj exactly bro i gotta hit the gym im not gonna accept myself being skinny

[@JoseSantos-el8nj]

@@marcschox4769 That's what I've been doing bro, keep it up you're gonna make it

[@cameronbajt4]

"Keeping emotional expression in check actually inspires resolves in others" - this is actual gold.

[@shawarmageddonit]

Well, not "ACTUAL".

[@TorsteinTheFallen]

Amazing content. I had to watch it few times and think about situations i was in. This is spot on and very helpful.

[@mathiaschristensen1194]

Video aside, Im so glad you exposed me to this shows existense, it is absolutely incredible. Jon Hamm absolutely NAILS this role in an almost surreal perfect fashion.

[@jannazepp8939]

I totally and finally fell in love with the Don Draper character when he embraced the other guy in genuine empathy and in a gesture of comfort. That was his defining moment as a human. Also, Jon Hamm. Wow. What an amazing actor.

[@raydencreed1524]

@Janna Zepp When the dude was describing his dream, I felt like I wanted to give him a hug. And then Don goes and actually does it, holy crap.

[@jannazepp5161]

Greg Walker yes. It is totally conditional. We don’t like whiny wimps who tell us who they think we are. We like men who don’t blame us for everything that is wrong. We like men who like women. We hate men who hate women. So yeah. You are right. It IS conditional. Those are the conditions. I have my own money. My husband has his own money. Get a job, a clue, snd stop being a weakling.

[@davidohmart1336]

New to this channel Really like what I have seen an heard Have been going through this stuff for 28yrs of sobriety The pause is one of the best things to master Also from Jorden Peterson that you have talked about you want to be thought of as dangerous And the stance is part of it Comand the pace Thanks like your channel

[@johannabonana5306]

I need to watch this video every day. You know, I think I will. This will be my morning routine.

[@EllaRingrose]

With Confidence it is also to remind yourself that everyone is going through things, everyone is up in their own heads worrying about themselves. Once you realise this it is so easy to walk around with ease and assured in who you are. Everyone is human. With any scenario that scares you, ask yourself the simple question ‘What is the worst outcome that can happen from this situation’, usually it isn’t half as bad as we make it out to be! Fear is False Evidence Appearing Real. Challenge yourself everyday and you will step into a Confident Person. All the love and incredible video, Thank you x

[@fibonaccisrazor]

That was everything in a nutshell - spot on, I think.

[@dorian_tihi5869]

Hey Beatiful people, I Just Started my own Channel Inspired by David and I just wanted to let you know. It might be Interesting for you and i would appreciate it if you would show some support. See you there ;)

[@Matt-cl4mp]

I was manspreading on the bus to act more confident and I ended up getting slapped again.

[@adrienne2838]

That’s so selfish, how dare you not leave space for the people next to you, you don’t own the bus man

[@jauntyangle5667]

Zip up your flies next time.

[@erravi]

Manspreading? You mean having balls?

[@bingbongabinga2954]

Alphas don't offend a women's mating instincts. Beta's are percieved as falsely advertising when manspreading.

[@JimmyLeeJr]

Weren't manspreading enough

[@BibleIkashika]

4:16 ...when a man is nervous its because he cares. And when a man cares...I don't take that lightly or for granted!!

[@trev6664]

Madmen is by far one of the best shows ever created. You cannot change my mind

[@joedaemohoe1387]

I know he' a fictional character, but hes a big role model to me Edit: Let me Clarify, a role model for confidence, and anything relating to that, because as a kid (i obviously didnt have it as hard as the character) i was homeless most of the time, bullied, shy, people pleaser, rarely stood up for myself, etc. And i admire how don handles people who dont agree with him and does what he want, even if its confrontational (I dont admire all the cheating, lying, and manipulating he does) I hope this clears things up Btw, Thank You guys for all the likes an comments

[@davidb9779]

Stealing then identity of a real soldier when Don was too much of a coward and clutz. Taking credit for someone else's work Compulsovely lying

[@davidb9779]

???

[@poespoemspwnposers8007]

you need a new role model

[@davidb9779]

@_CalmPsycho _ You did not get the point. He has NPD the confidence is superficial to mask his emptiness and in the process hurts his family. A man who hurts his family is no man as the purpose of a man is the health of his family.

[@JasonJia11]

He's a role model for uber amounts of confidence and seducing/marketing skills. But other than that he's the farthest thing from a role model.

[@freelcf]

Be true and authentic, and we'll always be ok.

[@jonnycpardoe]

Thank you. A great and sensible comment.

[@anavalenz9716]

I agree with that. I always feel confident being myself and since I am an honest person people generally like me, if not at the beginning, because I am not good-looking, they will end up liking my personality.

[@jenniferholder5728]

I had this realization a few years ago that no matter what I said, the worst that could happen is somebody hates me or punches me in the face. Changed my life 200%.

[@khanfauji7]

I joined an executive meeting on video one time. And you could tell the most senior person in the room cause they were the most spread out. And the most senior was so relaxed that he looked like he was uncomfortably slouching down in his chair to a point it looked unprofessional. So much posturing in the corporate world. We’re still all animals an the end of the day.

[@GawdTy]

He looks like if micheal from the office was cool LOL

[@spencergrubb5153]

I think the term you're looking for is Michael Scarn

[@heavy-mente6370]

date michael?

[@sillyboy2223]

I gave you your 200th like. Your welcome!!!

[@ahmz1k]

Rasta Michael

[@cherchehacknostale]

SOOO TRUUUUE