Self-Sabotage: What triggers this destructive behaviour and how to stop doing it: SNW 012

[@Yes-hd5ku]

To all the self sabotaging people reading this i just wanna congratulate you on taking the first steps to fixing your behaviour by looking for these types of videos. I'm honestly proud of you all for making an effort and having the will to change for the better and i wish you lots of success with it. I really mean it. Keep up the good work

[@sophie8895]

Yes I don’t want to do anything in my life. I lost sight of the future but I still dream but I realise I’m shit at my dreamt future. I party and am self destructive, I do not want to change in my heart but mind says it’s probably better if u try and believe that u can do better. Every time I do anything good for myself it makes me sick and so does thinking about it.

[@Yes-hd5ku]

@@sophie8895 similar situation here. I have a hard time doing something beneficial for myself. But i'm making some baby steps and slowly improving

[@NasciParaAdorar7]

❤️ Aww, thanks!

[@LorddOfChaoss]

Thank You 💕

[@Whatis3387]

I’ve been searching for so long, trying to understand and better express why and how this behavior manifests. It is consistent with the behavior of getting close to what you want, being near it, imagining enjoying it, and then with a series of ‘shock’ing events, we conform to the critic/bully inside. “Stop her! She is too happy, smiling too much, she doesn’t deserve that. She has earned it, but it’s rude to be too happy. She is getting too close to living her dreams! How dare she?! Put her back in her place and burn the bridges back too!” Thank you for this. It brought me to tears. This was the first video I’ve watched of yours. Can’t wait for more relatable, compassionate, and intelligent explanations.

[@nickp6136]

Every day is a mental battle

[@melindanicoleee]

This, my friend, is the best video I’ve come across thus far addressing self sabotage. Thank you thank you thank you!!!!

[@Whatis3387]

Melinda Nicole me too. I’ve never had anyone really pinpoint this frustrating and exhausting behavior. I’m so tired of doing my best and never giving up, only to throw the game at the last second.

[@ewandao2630]

OMG, that's it, I didn't know what was myself limiting believe, but I was always nervous, living in fear, anxious, depressed, angry, easily got irritated, and easily lost my temper, now I know, I AM MY DAD! I used to hate him for constantly abusing me mentally and physically, but now I become very much like him, except I don't have a kid to abuse. So, I just aware and change it.

[@southwestsearch]

Very true. There have been times when I've caught myself saying something and then realizing what I just said. " OMG! I am my parents! "

[@florismeijer1503]

wow, great video. I'm really making my own life more difficult than it needs to be, but i keep myself down by smoking a lot of weed and not hanging out with friends. But it is based on my own low self-esteem , i'm afraid of something new, something better than this. I really like the idea of the fence, it's very relatable for me.

[@zedvassallo5197]

Grant, honestly I can't thank you enough for this eye opener. This video has opened my eyes and my mind to what I've really been feeling!!! Thank you so much!!

[@neen4484]

really amazing ... he is teaching the subject from his heart .. I been touched by it

[@erinmcmurtry5640]

I found this really helpful. Thanks. Once I realized how to stop it was the question to ask, i found this, and I feel I will do much better in the future. Thanks again. Great stuff.

[@azigj]

WOW !! It blows my mind ! It was fantastic. Thank you so much for this video. You gave me so much hope. Thank you !!!

[@starprime746]

During your video I took a trip inside myself and discovered everything you were saying is what I’ve secretly been doing my entire life. Thank you for this video.

[@Lubaneca]

Thank you, Grant! I really appreciate your videos and for being here for others! God bless you!

[@andrewalfalfa6872]

This was wonderful, thank you so much for taking the time to post this.

[@mariia9359]

Was crying during the whole video.. Thank you!

[@epiphanyx3705]

The best & most 'Diwn to Earth' explanation of conditioned 'self' negative belifs & sekf sabotage... Thank You

[@SuperAnthony47]

Thank you Grant, you video has awakened me. Best wishes ill be in touch, I need to work on something i have been avoiding chat soon Anthony

[@Fromaplaceoflove1971]

That is what my spirit needed to go even deeper than I did before to heal myself. I am actively unlearned all those limiting beliefs that have plagued me from having a relationship and having the success I want in my life. Thank you for this video it has shown me I am on the right path now I need to analyze myself more to get deeper into what I believe. Thank you again. Blessings.

[@kellichanel1348]

Yes the music was loud but dont self sabotage yourself out of hearing the message and applying it to your life

[@N29021]

I could hear much of what you were saying, the music in the background was too distracting, is there a way to listen to this without the music???

[@N29021]

sorry, I could NOT

[@getbakedtonight]

putting on subtitles helped

[@marleykun]

Fuckin negative nancy..! His voice is loud and clear

[@roccop913]

Music was perfect 👌👍

[@psychalogy]

Erika Pennella nope, sound balance was off. Music was too loud.

[@acpgiga]

Great job, Thank you!

[@mothergoose4231]

wow every word was for me and man hes right... im almost there like 90%, as you said, just needed some tweaking and this was it thanks Grant!

[@hawkpounder8335]

Hey, thanks for the advice. I have a friend who is sabotaging her life right now, but I got a lot of advice for myself too. Thank you.

[@teddia5654]

I really like your matter of fact manner ! I resonated with me ," today is going to pass anyway!" :)

[@claudiaelizee4106]

Excellent information and steps!!

[@harryschultze6690]

My best friend is living with me right now and he does this in the extreme! He speaks like a motivational speaker and yet he does the exact opposite in his life, he does everything he possibly can to self-sabotage himself and destroy his life! I'm going to have him watch this video and I hope he can get some help from it. I'm at my end with him I don't know what to do.

[@powerwill8748]

Music in background was self sabotage

[@ketitsints1222]

Very interesting and helpful insights’ thank you!

[@rickllee]

Great video grant. Thank you.

[@shaminashaikh9839]

Best vid on self sabotage topic all in one info needed thx

[@samanthaalexander3057]

such a motivational video. thanks

[@legendaries]

Amazing video and content, but please lower the music volume to background levels.

[@chrisadiputrahutagalung4982]

Thank you, Grant! I need this :(

[@catherinepatterson4720]

This was excellent. Thank you 🌻

[@chgofirefighter]

I’ve come to the conclusion that I’ve been self sabotaging my entire life, I wasn’t born with the tools needed as a child due to not being mentally nourished, growing up in an abusive home, alcoholics, drug addict parents, way too many personal things to say publicly, let’s just say that I had a fucked up childhood. Even though I’ve had brief periods of success, careers, relationships, friends, etc I’ve always managed to messed them up. Now as I’m older doesn’t necessarily mean that I’m wiser just means that I can reflect and realize that I had way too many opportunities in life and due to my own limited beliefs. Somehow my true potential wasn’t reached. Now I’m in the process of trying to clean up my own destructive behavior, but I’ve grown comfortable accepting which I shouldn’t that things most likely won’t get any better. Which is indeed my own self esteem and sub conscious mind telling exactly what I don’t need to hear. Anyway, my guess is that we all know what plagues us, but we don’t do enough to seek greener pastures due to fear, and fear is the worst form of self sabotaging behavior that exist. I wonder why this channel stopped posting videos years ago, because it had great potential one of the best “self sabotaging” informative videos I’ve come to see so far that strikes deep within the core.. great job!

[@angrycabby6903]

The fact that so many people could not hear what he was saying because of the soft music playing in the background only proves his point. I wanted to hear his words so my mind focused in on them and I could hardly hear the music until I was reading the comments, no joke. Our subconscious will block out what we don't believe and put us back on the track we were on in the first place. Thank you for your help, everything you talked about is what I have been living with all my life. I am that cow in the field but I am starting to understand why I have been doing what I do.

[@NasciParaAdorar7]

I'm glad it's so easy for you. I, however have ADD and if the music isn't at background level it grabs my attention more times than I can count (ADD musisician, so twice as attention-grabbing for me) I keep having to rewind to catch what he said, I've been at it for over 30 mins and haven't made it to the end of the video yet, now I have to go to work.

[@kahlodiego5299]

I just self sabotaged in a major way. Lost what I needed so badly. I just panicked and went nuts;threw away something I was offered and needed so badly, a real blessing. I feel like I won't survive this one. I feel like I don't want to. This put me in a position that isn't just unpleasant it's dangerous. It's like I was trying to prove some stupid point. Please help me.

[@matthewrigby38]

Very very good video. I have been struggling with self destructive behaviors and particularly within relationships. I start trying to self destruct and destroy the relationship when i am in a place where i dont feel safe. I am going to really try take the four steps and work on it and overcome my limitations and beliefs.

[@SolesOfPassion]

Thanks for this effort in getting such important info out!

[@peach172anonymous4]

Very well put together, not too much to absorb at once but enough to light the fire to fuel positive change. I kept stopping the video to take notes, so perhaps a link to a document or PDF with the notes-4 steps would be great. But then again, writing the notes myself forced me to think about the steps and the content. Now it's time to get myself to work on SUPER NOW SUPER WOW.

[@emman1296]

I needed this just so much rn. Thankyou so much

[@anythingspossible.]

Its too early in the morning to be crying like this..

[@anjkovo2138]

One step forward two steps back. My life in a nutshell😢

[@mkaiser29]

Dude, IMO everything in this video is perfect! Well done and thank you so much because this information is VITAL to so many! If I may add that the music probably seemed like a good touch BUT in fact it is why I had to stop it every 30 seconds haha. less is more i think, its too distracting and too loud but what do i know right!>?

[@JanelleFraser]

Thanks so much for sharing your knowledge! xo

[@welldone4789]

Very good info.....pity about the music.... could you post the same thing without the music please ?

[@katarzynagora63]

Thank you Grant!

[@indira5601]

Bizar how you describe exactly at what fase I'm at. I do need the help for the last 10% and I will get that. Thank you :)

[@highbackhand]

Thanks buddy! 😊😃

[@southwestsearch]

That was a very down to earth description.

[@alm_alb]

omg the repetitive background music is soo annoying!! I want to listen to the guy talk.

[@Brain__Drain]

The background music is sabotaging this video.

[@robert5159]

Thank you very much sir!!!

[@sheilakirwan6900]

Great that you are trying to help people 😊😊😊

[@spiral-viper]

It sucks when horrible things, or just unpleasant things and desolation become known territory. Then what is wonderful is so far out of reach that's it's unknown territory, we panic when we get there and choose to return to limitation and misery. Fear is the mindkiller.

[@stevebailey3291]

Thanks Grant...really...thanks much!

[@idekkmeganx4012]

your videos are so helpful, thankyou❤️

[@practicallyIndependent]

Great video. Thank you

[@NSGillan]

top notch mate, thanks

[@pilgrim1355]

mindfulness during daily stress is very helpful

[@Damngoodchicken_]

for me its because my family never encouraged me to do things I loved. they joke and clown a lot. they talk and gossip about people so I never wanted to do anything to stand out

[@shereepfeiffer6356]

very good.

[@missovercomer2488]

You can still hear him talking over the music so whats the issue??

[@melindanicoleee]

Nefertiti Negus Exactly. If they wanted to really hear the message, they would.

[@NasciParaAdorar7]

Actually, it's pretty hard for someone with ADD. I'm having to rewind several times. In the end, this video will take over 40 mins for me

[@MM-lr5hv]

Thank you your speech is really helpful

[@sanditeale3632]

Thank you, life changer

[@GrantJMarshFan]

Sandi Teale thank you for taking the time to leave such a lovely response

[@sanditeale3632]

Grant J Marsh I honestly have been to half a dozen therapists and they started in different ways of saying it was my beliefs and then told me what they knew..about beliefs.. Lol.. so you have helped crack the shell... Gratitude

[@Cateverydayy]

Loved it! Thank you!

[@OTWetzel]

Great stuff. Thanks

[@itsVollx]

I've lost control and I keep doing the wrong and it is very destructive

[@Triptoons]

itsVollx i feel your pain brutha, i hope you can get out of your own head and move onward and upward bud. have a good day man.

[@marklynch2382]

You have every right to change those wrong beliefs as they were not even your beliefs in the first place

[@mig23flogger88]

Grant..I enjoyed this . Thankyou. Please ignore the ignorant and ungrateful pillocks who instead of thanking you for your effort , instead choose to whinge and moan about the music.

[@mistermeelar7975]

I hate when great videos are drowned out by music. I understand why it's used but in reality if what one is saying is really beneficial music will not enhance it no more than the point being made and the benefit one gets out of it.

[@peach172anonymous4]

Mister Meelar I disagree, the music was uplifting and made my heart heart he positive message of what was being relayed. I wouldn't change a thing in this video.

[@mariaamroussi6142]

I agree wholeheartedly with you. Music adds nothing to add good speech. Music is a distraction. And people in North America just accept being distracted, so they learn little and what they learn is quickly lost.

[@deelightful6124]

3 days befire a BIG audition..i partied hard and loss my voice...although i had been practicing...studying hard in preperatiin fjr weeks...threw it away in one night....audition is tomorrow and my voice has not fully recovered...stupid

[@marleykun]

My mother is the one that breaks my spirit since i was a child, i could never had a relationship cos i was afraid of what she will say cos since i was a child i was good for nothing according to her, they always expected the worse for me.. as an adult i got married and moved to another state away from her... and she will still manipulate me to the point that i sabotage my marriege and managed to fuck it up.. moved back to California penny Less... and my mother was very happy i divorced and took me into her home , had a room ready for me.. as SHE KNEW MY MARRIAGE WASNT GONNA WORK 😒😞😒

[@chimannadi4550]

You need more subscribers.. amazing

[@tarniahastings3640]

Thankyou

[@HighVibeCat]

Super. Thank you dearly

[@nantage5513]

this was really good advice

[@trenorman832]

ex gf did this with everything including our relationship and it effected me

[@therawcaviat]

Great info..

[@milliebucks6050]

great video

[@kevinkong6653]

THE COW needs to break through the electric fence dispite feeling the pain of the electric shock & as he fights to breaks through the fence and the PAIN intensifies he then needs to decide that he is willing to DIE for his freedom or go back to being a slave again, only then will he break free.

[@strongmindhuman]

awesome !

[@roccop913]

😭😭😭😭😭... Thank you for this.....

[@damansingh3642]

i wouldve watched the entire thing 3 times if you didn't have music playing in the background almost over your speech the entire time.

[@Banana-lk7tf]

I'm not a self sabotager but I still like to watch videos like this so I can understand the thought process of people who do self-sabotage. I love the content but I have to say, the music is super distracting. What you had to say was brilliant without it.

[@chimannadi4550]

Love you brother

[@ycy-technologies]

thank you!

[@gladiammgtow4092]

music us not required

[@kahlodiego5299]

My therapist encouraged this self sabotage. I fired her.

[@eliomagno6755]

ty sir.

[@thomasoring]

20 minutes of the same 4 chords does not sound appealing to me. I wanted to hear what you had to say, but I will skip. Sorry.

[@Viktuz.Thaddeus]

Maybe if my parents didn't make my childhood so hellish I wouldn't self sabotage:(

[@eliciagarcia3601]

Im not friggen listening to the rest of this that music is too annoying, I’ll just continue my self destructive behaviour screw this

[@mig23flogger88]

Good luck loser

[@robbertryckaert9027]

Had to switch on sub titles

[@ashleyvalentin3210]

I resonated very much with the cow analogy. Thank you so much for sharing!

[@MsSamanthaTKO]

Stopped in at 7 mins but I got it.

[@TK-nk1cv]

The music is sabotaged by all the talking.

[@suebar]

Brilliant. But talks too fast. Limiting beliefs, changed to more helpful thought/ belief is totally true and the right answer.

[@duedecimal6622]

i can't hear most of his words. meh.

[@mariaamroussi6142]

You have an Excellent speech to give. But you are spoiling it all, with the intrusive distraction of the loud music, undermining the full benefit of your speech. If the music was softer, lower or not at all, one could obtain the full benefit of it. Much is lost by the loud music .

[@Grace4ever22]

Man, you sabotaged this video with the loud and irritating background music!

[@molliemk3477]

Intro is way too long. U don’t need to keep going on what it is, we all know what self sabotage is and just come here for the reason, not a description of what a self sabotage is.