Sexy Bed Hair

[@babyfat2b]

My concern for the women out here that are asking themselves this question is that it makes me think that the root cause of this question stems from the idea of still having to try and "fit" into the "society norm" of what is deemed "Sexy hair". The truth is, we are not the norm--nor should we have to apologize for it. We have our night-time routine in order to protect our tresses. If the person they are with, is not okay with that, my advise is politely inform them that this is a part of who you are. if they don't like it, direct them to the door! Be with someone who values you--not someone who wants to fit you in a mold that was never for you! Know your worth and value ladies! Much love!

[@WhatTheKink]

10 years together/6 years married. We BOTH tie our hair up for bed. We're a curly couple and we don't do frizz in this house!

[@4evahazeleyez]

I agree. I’ve been with my husband 17 years, will be married 11 years this November. He’s not concerned about my hair at this point lol.

[@ToshiJ89]

4evahazeleyez same

[@BlakIzBeautyful]

Right.

[@Knot4Sadie]

Mine either. Gets messed up during the process anyway lol

[@selenabrown8123]

4evahazeleyez nope !! Lol 😂 😂😂 All about dem cookies 😋

[@1SewSweet]

Great video! You made me laugh quite a bit in this video, truly enjoyed it! My husband is non-black and we had this conversation about bed hair quite a while ago. His statement to me, “your hair isn’t what I’m after in bed!”. He was more interested in what I was wearing (or not wearing, LOL!)

[@BlakIzBeautyful]

Yassss @ the hubby's comment. LOL Glad you enjoyed this video. thanks for watching.

[@nicthommi]

One of my friends who has a white husband said the first time she spent the night, she pulled out that scarf before climbing into bed, and he said not one word...

[@BlakIzBeautyful]

Not one! - hes smart.

[@gemqueen1866]

@@nicthommi lol😆😆😆😆

[@TheSilverCrownNaturalGreyHair]

Mine doesn’t care either. Never has. He even brings me my bonnet at times! 😅 Married for 10 years; together for 6 weeks before those 10 years.❤️

[@imgrownforreal]

Most men don't care as long as your scarf or bonnet is clean and cute. Most women know when it's time to get cute, like when you have on your cute lingerie or whatever. On a day to day, he gon get this lovin with my silk scarf on, or go to sleep unsatisfied. We dealt with their curl bags, doo rags and loc socs, so I better not hear anything about a bonnet. :)

[@uncagedlearning]

LOL! You are so right! Curl bags!? That's a new one for me.

[@letitiamenefee1742]

My husband will remind me to put my bonnet on or twists my hair at night.. he’s doesn’t care.. if I forget he will get up and get me my pillow with the silk case on it.. lol

[@HolyDiva73]

I'm been divorced now for a year now. When I was married, girl he just wanted some. I could have gone to bed with a monkey wrapped around my head for all he cared. He wasn't big on what was on my head or on my body. He was a man, he just wanted some. Such a fun video! Cute hair! Tutorial please. I really love the elegant simplicity of it. And the makeup, you did that!!!!

[@tanyadias1039]

Alfredasworld seriously which man would care what you wear on your head when he really want some.....I love the way you say he just wanted some! Lol My husband couldn't give a monkeys what I got on my head. Great topic....

[@BlakIzBeautyful]

🐒

[@aleshabee7386]

This video is funny....I've only ever dated in my race and they know about that bonnet life lol

[@BlakIzBeautyful]

That's whats up! See I personally was like "is this an issue"? While i understand a bonnet isn't sexy, if you don't wear the bonnet then you just dont wear it.

[@aleshabee7386]

BlakIzBeautyful Exactly...if the bonnet comes off during bedroom antics 😉😉😉 girl I'll be slipping it back on after lol

[@angelica7588]

I was waiting on someone to address this issue.

[@504gurl7]

I totally agree with you. My husband and I have been married almost 15 years, together for 16 years. Honey sexy is what sexy does!

[@solopenny]

love this video. For me it's not about my partner, it's about me. I hate bonnets and don't feel sexy in them no matter how cute the bonnet is - they simply don't work for me. I've worn natural hair for most of my life and for years wore it short and didn't have to deal with a "nighttime routine" Now it's longer and it's all about the silk pillowcase.

[@andreadouglas4738]

I don't have a problem with the way bonnets look, I actually feel cute in them, but unfortunately, they make my scalp itch like crazy. I love me a satin pillow case though. Even got my husband, who's white and doesn't need one at all, using one lol.

[@triciacharles8022]

I’ve been with my bf for over 2 years and he’s not concerned about it at all. He loves my natural hair. As I always say if you don’t love me while I look like an extra from The Color Purple then you don’t deserve me at my twist out 😉

[@darlenespencer]

Tricia Charles 💜💗💖💚💛🧡❤️💝

[@iateyursandwiches]

LMAOO! the color purple tho? 😂

[@louwil67]

😩😂

[@Naturallyvegan]

My fiance is white. When we first met I had my hair in extensions and he wanted to see my real hair. From then on I didn't care what I looked like in bed cause I knew he didn't care.

[@beautifuldreamer8803]

This is a great conversation topic. I am single and hoping that it will not be a problem when I am in a relationship.

[@BlakIzBeautyful]

I honestly think you will be fine Sis

[@mrsbrownLove]

I've been with my husband for 16 years, married for almost 14. I'm more concerned about my hair than he is. If I've got a good twist out situation going on and "the moment" arrives with no time to retwist or pineapple, he's told me "babe, bring the chocolate here. Make an appointment tomorrow, I'll pay to get it redone!" 😂😂😂 . But you know ladies, we can go "to bed" with sexy hair and still have sexy hair after "the moment" is over.😉 Cuz, we know how to make that happen!

[@shapelfrangrance]

see imma school you on my hair way before hand, im gonna put on my silk or satin scarf or even my slap cap....i can careless how he thinks i look....all he gotta do is visualize how i looked 10 mins ago and lets begin.....LOL

[@CourtneyDobard]

My hair stays in a bonnet and my boyfriend of 2 years has absolutely no problem with it. I did read some comments on another video where they said their bf/husband would flip out of they came to bed with their hair wrapped up. My man don't care at all and definitely not gonna let a bonnet stop him from getting some.

[@authentica6345]

Mine pulls out the bonnet out.... Listen, he loves grabbing this thick lush natural hair.

[@tieashasamuels2627]

I loved this message ♥️. My husband be like "bring that bonnet over here" 😂

[@BlakIzBeautyful]

LMOA!!!!!!

[@sharondenise40]

June will make 29 years we've been married and my husband absolutely DOES NOT care about what is on my head.😘

[@hpysparrow]

I enjoyed this so much!!! :D and the comments lol

[@lealeaj1096]

Love ur look in this video...

[@nicthommi]

Agree. I saw a tweet by a woman who said she was having sex and kept trying to straighten her wig and the man yanked it off and said "focus"...other friends, even ones who dated non-black men, never paused on bringing a bonnet when she thought she'd be spending the night the first time.

[@BlakIzBeautyful]

❤️

[@karehijo]

All I could think of is “head scarf and coconut oil“! Hmmm. I think it’s time for a line of matching bonnets and sexy pjs 😄. Seriously, if I knew how to sew, I’d be on it.

[@okaygworl]

In my situation (single; recent college grad; was in a 1 year relationship) if I felt like 'looking' sexy in bed it would be according to how my hair is. If it was straight then I would put it in a ponytail (but he would rip it out of it's ponytail state lmao), so it would end up in a bun by the end of the night. If it was in it's natural twist-out state then I wouldnt have to do anything except keep a hair tie or scarf on the night stand to put in a pineapple for ahem..'afterwards'. I always sleep with a satin pillowcase. I cant do bonnets because they always fall off. Another tip is to NEVER go to bed (or have relations) with your natural hair damp/wet because at that point your twist out is a waste. Last thing is that I went to an HBCU so all of the guys already knew what was up when it came to natural hair lol. Good luck!

[@02007088]

I couldn't agree more lol! When I say my husband couldn't care less about a dang bonnet, I mean it is impossible to care less lol!

[@NessahSimmons]

My partner, who’s black, doesn’t mind my hair. He’s accustomed to my natural hair and understands how and why I wear it the way I do at night.

[@carcars2002]

MY WIG COMES OFF WHEN I GET HOME SO BONNET IT IS....HE DONT GIVE A DAMN LOL

[@shanekquadenise3924]

My husband doesn't care really because I have always thrown on my bonnet at night, but now every once in a while, I gotta go to bed cute if I'm wearing something really cute, I will leave my hair down and just do a wash and go in the morning. So mostly on the weekends....we got babies lol

[@ScienceNsoul3]

Pineapple with a satin scrunchy, and make sure to have a satin pillow case! I don't wear bonnets typically because it smushes my curls, so the loose pineapple is my go too. My partner doesn't care at all, but I feel less self conscious if I know my hair isn't looking crazy the whole time.

[@StephTho]

My husband knows what time it is. Lol!!! We do get a lil ki-ki when I wear my Grace Eleyae hat to bed. Lol! Sometimes, I wear my hair in a high bun or pony n a head band (the ones look like a loc soc but much shorter) around the perimeter of my head. Either way, he does not care. I am more concerned than he. Also, the young lady may want to invest in a silk pillowcase. Love this video, cute topic.

[@uncagedlearning]

Ha! Love this video and this topic. I've been with my hubby for 13 years also and we have 5 kids. They all came and I don't think it mattered whether I had my hair covered or not. He doesn't care at this point. LOL! Now, I have my moments when I purposely don't wear one, but I am more prone to do so when my hair needs to be washed anyway and I'm not heading anywhere in the morning. Then, I don't care how wild it gets, because sometimes, he likes to pull it. And that is a turn on to me. ;)

[@michael50694]

Yaaaasssss for that healthy sex life. #gottakeepitfreashandfun

[@preciouslafleur5390]

I agree with you. I’ve been married for thirteen years. My husband doesn’t mind what my hair looks like at night. We have four children together under the age of eleven. Right now my hair is in a low bun after wearing Curlformers over the weekend. I’ll wash it and probably twist it up to wear a twist out. I do Wash and Gos when the weather gets warmer and he loves it either way. I always look cute. 😝 btw your hair has grown since your taper cut. It looks cute!

[@uncagedlearning]

Wow! We have 5 kids, 9 and under. Been together 13 yrs, married 10. I don't think these kids came about from me NOT wearing a bonnet to bed. LOL! ;)

[@NaturallyNita]

I've been married for 2 years and my bedtime hair routine has never been an issue. I did marry a man in my race so he was already up on how black women (straight or curly) deal with their hair. Like many others have said, he is waay more excited by the actual intimacy that what I'm wearing (or not). Plus I'm a big proponent of start out how you're gonna hold out. We were already exclusive & committed before we took that step (a whole 'nother post). I knew that I was not going to be trying to leave my hair loose and out during marriage so I wasn't going to start that expectation before then.

[@naturalyblessed]

Hubby could care less!!!! I have had that bonnet snatched off and then twist pulled on lol but it’s cool!! Just put the bonnet back on afterwards

[@kimmyhotstuff]

Well I'm with my husband 10 years now married for 6 hearsay this is not at issue at all not even in the beginning we trying to get it in we ain't worried about hair lol thanks for sharing

[@kimmyhotstuff]

Years*

[@idowhaticando]

The most I’m trying to do on a regular night is tie my hair neatly with a black, silk scarf. If it bothers him THAT much, he is not the one for me...ijs

[@saniyyahgreene7154]

Ladies just let it be wild and free cause that bonnet ain’t staying on anyways.....otherwise you ain’t doin’ it right.....😂😂😂😂 #jokes #doyoubooboo #toeachherown #thebonnetisnotadealbreaker

[@xafir2816]

Don’t worry ladies if he‘s the right one he is not about your hair while going down. ;)My first night with my bf was me being: completely drunk, deeply oiling my hair while drunk, wearing my silk cap. :D we still made it hahaha

[@LaResaEyvon]

I agree with everything you said, Jenell! I have been with my husband for 14 years, married 6 years in September. He could care less how my hair (or in my case my bonnet 😂)looks when it comes time to “get it in”!!! He’s usually just like, leggo! 🤣🤣🤣

[@itsMarvyBaby]

I agree with all of it! Excellent advice.

[@Lady4Life]

Good question. I would say use a satin pillowcase. But I also love your suggestion...top knot, puff, ... perfect.

[@monicaDD]

Having been married and now divorced, I agree with all your points. Only difference is age. As an older natural men react very differently.

[@dazzlingcelery]

girl you speaking the truth! love your videos!

[@kittycatt9426]

Lol..."get it in"

[@katrinabell1847]

My husband hates the bonnet, but understands its purpose. Sometimes I keep it on while getting it in and sometimes I take it off!

[@MzChocol8star]

My boo could care less

[@litebright1720]

Tuh... mine you about to get this 😻😻😻with my bonnet, scarf, durag whatever I got on my head. I have rectly cut my hair again and it's a twa now so sometimes I'll sleep without one because I moisturize daily pretty much use my curling sponge and roll out. But when my hair is longer it's a scarf errday B. He don't give 2 rats tails about that he ain't focusing on my hair.

[@Taisha12001]

I wholeheartedly agree with you. I let my boyfriend (who I've been with for 12 years) see me when I putting my hair in twist and when I have my bonnet on and he does not have a problem with it. He's more interested in what I'm not wearing than what's on my head when it's fun time.😉🔥

[@kourtneyrenee08]

Hilarious! Before we get it in, this will scarf is going on. Especially if I'm on first day hair?! Shoot lol

[@cocoalove18]

Great video! Hubby and I have been together for 14 years as of this year (November) and married for 7 (also November), all of my adult life (I married at 22). He sometimes may comment on my bonnet like "come here granny", which we burst out laughing to. He loves when I wear it down, but I have thick tailbone length hair now....so that's a no most times. It'll be a bother to deal with once we're done. I've been rocking twists for a while now, so I let 'em hang🙄🙃 then put them right back up. We both win 😏

[@rinawallace1962]

Great topic. Loved it!

[@SNEAKO15]

I'm divorced now, but no man has ever put the brakes on when I rocked my satin scarf. BUT if I'm concerned, I put her (my hair) in two afro puffs.

[@Dsmileybface]

Interesting topic, I've never thought about it much. My boyfriend wears his du rag to bed and I wear my bonet. I also have a satin pillow case at my house. I normally wear my hair in twists so getting it in without a bonet is cool, he likes to run his fingers through my hair anyway and that counts as a scalp massage to me! If my Bonet is on, sometimes he takes it off. I have noticed my hair being dry after sleeping on his cotton pillow case so after the deed is done i will then put on my bonet. Simple

[@Lorionta1]

Can you do a video on your bun please?!?! 🙏

[@renisha_th]

I’ve been with my SO for almost 3 years and l wear my bonnet or scarf to bed. It was never a issue for me or him

[@BlakIzBeautyful]

And it shouldnt be an issue.

[@alandriahaynes1157]

My partner does not even care about how my hair looks like when we go to bed trust me that’s not his first focus when we are together (WINK WINK 😉) 😂😂😂

[@naturalyblessed]

I love you for this video

[@nieceypiecey100]

I can’t wear things on my head at night...only rarely. I just find it super uncomfortable and it never stays on my head. Shrug

[@NaturallyKayD]

My hubby could care less because my hair is the last thing on his mind at that time.

[@thehondfamily1268]

Get in😂😂😂

[@fatimamanneh3722]

I am married to my husband almost 3 years now it has never been a issue husband is from West Africa every woman wears a hair wrap/scarf to bed lol

[@BklynGirl72]

My husband care how my hair is.

[@queenstatus3049]

No bonnets! Guys hate those. I do middle part two twists on the side and scarf tied around the edges .

[@missbeeline]

Yoqlene not all guys. You'd be surprised

[@joycedelifus4979]

I don’t do much of nothing to my hair at night, mostly in twist under a scarf, no my husband doesn’t care how my hair is when going to bed. Use to do rollers, 😜😜

[@thecreater9310]

Hi; I've been with my Man for 15 Years. I wear Beautiful Bonnets. Yes, He's Ok with That.