Should You Ever Pass Judgement On Your Therapy Clients?

Sometimes a client can 'challenge' our therapeutic objectivity. Take Kathleen, for example.
Kathleen was a client of mine who I felt had been indoctrinated through a series of 'Awaken' workshops over the previous year, and as a result she had left her loving husband and three young children.
As you might imagine, I found myself struggling with the idea of trying to help Kathleen rise above what seemed to me to be justified anger over this from family members and friends.
So in this video I share 3 tips (starting from 7:21) from my observations as to how we can work effectively with therapy clients, even though they might challenge your own assumptions and values.
If you found this video helpful then please leave comment and hit the 'like' button - and don't forget to subscribe for future videos.
All notes and references can be found on the original article over on the blog:
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++About Mark Tyrrell++
Psychology is my passion. I've been a psychotherapist trainer since 1998, specializing in brief, solution focused approaches. I now teach practitioners all over the world via our online courses.
More about me here:
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[@leilaw8331]

You are the best therapist I have ever known! So honest and experienced! Your techniques and advice are invaluable. Many thanks and God bless you!✝️🙏

[@Pax-Christi]

God bless you too Leila 🙏🏽✝️

[@carlossaroufim]

We can only be client led to a certain point. Thank you for the lovely video.

[@HereIsmarcus]

Great food for thought. I’m wondering why she wanted to leave her husband. She wasn’t happy, obviously. What needs weren’t being met? I’m not an experienced therapist but I’m inagining that’s what I’d be working on. Incidentally my ideas are coming from videos you made. You’re a big influence and I greatly value your videos. You’re great teacher.

[@TheMattjudo26]

Her "need" to be Caligula, doing what she wanted when she wanted to do it, wasn't being met. Also, her need to suffer and then realize that we live in a world where we need other people and that the Dali lama's mandate that we be wisely selfish and help others is indeed wisely, selfish.

[@kimneuparth5565]

This is so helpful, thank you so much.

[@lisamayleggott]

Really helpful and honest. Thank you. Amazing as always!

[@etrebelle9812]

how many dads leave their young children to pursue their own interests (or another woman), then go to therapy and don't even mention the fact? The fact a client tells you something, means they are at least showing you this thing. It means they probably at least pondered if that was the right thing to do. The worst people won't even bother. I feel like her urge to escape the children signals such a strong discomfort and hatred for family life, that could be addressed and resolved in different ways.

[@owotime6883]

7:55 wasn't expecting that comment hahaha

[@karianned3211]

It’s unfortunate people don’t have to go through lessons and licensing before having children.

[@Massi94211]

1:29 ouch haha

[@ChitchatwithApril]

Bravo!

[@ObamaoZedong]

Heh. Easier said than done. Much easier.

[@beren1223]

Too late now, but I would have liked to introduce Kathleen to Attachment Theory, ACE's, Romanian's orphanes, to try to educate her about the futures of people who feel abandoned by a parent, to try to instill some compassion and concern for her own children. She likely thought too highly of herself, superior to her husband, and just wanted to punish him for not worshiping her like a Goddess.

[@etrebelle9812]

people who feel great about themselves don't need cult or go to endless self-improvement sessions. I feel like this lady was like a pregnant child: not ready to be a parent when she became one. God knows why she had kids in the first place. Before a person can feel empathy without losing their will to live, their basic psychological needs have to have been met. She couldn't feel empathy because she was in need herself for love meaning and faith in humanity. Maybe the ''decent husband'' was unbearable to her, the worst pairing ever made. I feel like with guidance she could have come to understand how to be a good mom in her own way, how SHE could be a mom, even a self-improved strong independent 'different' mom, rather than feeling like there was a choice between owning her own life and mental stability and giving all her identity and mental strenght away to fulfill a role of mom as described by someone else...a description she apparently hated (more than the kids themselves....).