Should YOU Trust the Narcissist? Is He Authentic or Fake? (COMPILATION)

Can you trust a narcissist? Is s/he fake or authentic?
Cognitive distortion, shared fantasy, lack of empathy, no external objects or emotions, entraining, projective identification - how can you trust someone like that?
Whether to trust a narcissist or not depends on his locus of grandiosity: an inner speech constellation of introjects that resemble a conscience and afford self-regulate as well as impulse and behavioral controls in accordance with a cognitively distorted, fantastic, inflated narrative of self-perception.
If the narcissist’s fantastic, inflated self-image is about his trustworthiness, reliability, truthfulness, morality, altruism, giving and contributions to the community - then you can trust such a prosocial communal narcissist.
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[@alexismerrilldragonqueen6552]

Trusting a narcissist? I can hardly trust ANYONE, let alone someone with a severe personality disorder who at any point in time is willing to destroy me.

[@WinterWarlock261]

Trusting a narcissist is like playing Russian Roulette. 5 of the chambers might be empty, but one isn't. And you never know if today is the day you're going to get that one, until it's too late. Smartest thing to do is not take the chance to begin with. Assume all of them are full to begin with, and realize the pointlessness of even taking the risk.

[@breemorrison901]

You can trust the Narcissist to be a Narcissist.

[@ladycash384]

Trusting a narcissist is like trusting a monster that it will never swallow or destroy you. Folks run...🏃

[@eebiggz]

How do you know a narcissist is being fake? He’s breathing.

[@90210Skye]

"...an absence pretending to be a presence...". Wow.

[@Bubble-hw5pm]

In a heated argument, he said “you’ve never not once passed any test with me, every single test for a wife you never bleeping passed!” And i thought back on one of your lectures- i cant find it but man.. you are right on the money every time professor.

[@user-rt3wk9ju1g]

This is the crux of why friends & family can't make sense of the contradictory behavior. Thank you, Sam.

[@collykarma8743]

I feel that after doing the inner work that I needed to do and watching numerous videos on NPD , you become indifferent to them as you can clearly see how they mimic people and if you just look at them you can actually see nothing of substance ? You can see and feel the emptiness . It’s been heartbreaking realising this even though it nearly killed me ,I felt like I had swapped bodies with him - empty ! Whilst I felt like this he said he felt the happiest he’d ever been ! Compassion from a distance . You can see it everywhere and it’s scary ! Professor Vaknin you are the best lecturer in this field and please don’t stop your work trying to enlighten the world xx

[@l.sylvester5871]

The empty feeling was so depressing to experience.

[@tanyadepoalo4312]

This is why the victim becomes so angry, depressed, negative, complaining, unmotivated, starts to shout and name call, even rage at times etc etc .the victim starts to behave exactly like the narcissist, the narcissist then sits back and point his finger, forgetting that this has been his behavior all along.

[@TowgPowerPlay]

Does a narcissist trust himself? LOL

[@samvaknin]

No. This is why he seeks validating feedback from others (narcissistic supply).

[@tanyadepoalo4312]

My recent ex whom I believe to be a N. Told me he did not trust himself

[@derfholl5216]

What I take away from this session is…there is no resolution.

[@Watermelonn8990]

If your grandiosity is underpinned in an idea of moral superiority (like being honest, prosocial etc), is this behaviour also some form of pathology of the mind?

[@samvaknin]

Search the channel for “prosocial”, “communal”, “victimhood”.

[@Watermelonn8990]

@@samvaknin thank you

[@marlyjung4102]

Do you have a resource for those of us that work with toddlers? How can one tell if they are separating/individualizing? What can on do to help them do so? etc

[@samvaknin]

Search the channel for "mother"

[@Abdunative]

How does it feel for the narcissist to experience amnesia (some things/moments) they dont remember? Second question: Sam, do the psychopath or narcissist get angry when their lies are exposed?

[@samvaknin]

You can't feel anything for things you never remember in the first place. Second question: yes.

[@Abdunative]

@@samvaknin true, but don't they feel like something is odd/out of place in that moment? To the second question: sorry what I meant is actually if the psychopath gets angry despite that he doesn't confabulate?

[@Robert-zl2eo]

Never, ever ever, ever trust a narc Better to be safe

[@bjmbijelic]

Благодарам

[@arthurlockwood8735]

Lucky to be alive mental health problems with her its not good enough my life is over now 😭🙏

[@debbiemanning3910]

I'm hopelessly in love w a narcissist, I think alot have to do with I feel sorry that he was raised that way😟

[@Abdunative]

Professor vaknin, i have experience with a man who seemed to lie, but I wonder if it's confabulation, because he could become violent when u challenged 'the lie'. He always was only nice and charming to get something that he became indifferent again. Would u think he could be, a narcissist or psychopath?

[@cvsmiss7578]

I’m being gangstalked by them

[@PaigeSquared]

In projective identification from a family of origin, could a child identify with parts that a parent placed on them, well into adulthood? Are there certain signs of this? Keywords i might follow up on?

[@samvaknin]

Yes, this happens. Will dedicate a video to it.

[@PaigeSquared]

@@samvaknin in the video, I would appreciate if you could comment on the adult child's capacity to differentiate, if that capacity changes while socializing with the system, and what level of interaction can prevent them from growing beyond the family narrative. If there are multiple siblings, are there any patterns in the presentation of projected identification (say in the case of a shared primary caregiver with narcissitic tendencies). Will all have the capacity to step outside of the dynamic? Are there certain traits that make this task more or less challenging/likely to happen, between the siblings? I'm not 100% sure, but I do suspect I'm dealing with this. Personally, I often feel like the community reflects the opposite of what my family reflected to me, which is jarring to navigate. I struggle to identify my own strengths and skill sets, and I am always surprised if I am assigned or chosen to be the lead of a group project, in both professional and personal life. I am in my thirties and still feel like I don't have permission to be a "real" person.

[@jesbecuz]

Ahahaha nope no trust. Used to be trustworthy tho. He changed after he had cardiac arrest. Yes. Never trust one. Liar pants. He broke my phone, computer, monitor, burned my pics and art, abused me physically and mentally and today ..I finally wanted to eat. Saw he had a phone after me trying to get to a dv shelter. Called the cops on me after I heard voices and people. Saying I was on drugs. Turns out I am not crazy! 😊

[@jesbecuz]

Sir vaknin, you are our hero. Can all of us have one of you?!

[@cheezitsw3279]

Is there any essential difference between a narcissist and a chatbot?

[@samvaknin]

Search the channel for "chatGPT".

[@Abdunative]

Professor vaknin u say around 10:00 in the video that narcissists doesnt lie but dont they, the same as all other people? Disordered or not

[@samvaknin]

Yes, of course, but not in order to secure goals, like the psychopath. For example: narcissists do not gaslight.