Should you wait…or move on?

Skyler writes, “Met this guy on a hook-up site. It’s been a few weeks now we regularly spend time together, in and out of the house. We cuddle & kiss but he will not have sex with me again. Says he's in a time of transition & doesn't want to hurt me. His XBF has cancer, they regularly see each other but they’re not hooking up. He's the first guy that fits right. Am I wasting time or should be patient? Thanks!”
Work with me: susanwinter.ne...
The Dating Games Guide: You know you're being played, but what's the game?
And what's your countermove?
Not to worry. I’ve got you covered: susanwinter.re...
The Older Women | Younger Men Dating Guide:
Dating a younger man and wondering if it will last?
Attracted to an older woman and not sure how to make your move?
Answers to all your age gap questions: susanwinter.re...
Rough breakup?
Check out: Breakup Triage; The Cure for Heartache
Audible: www.audible.com...
Amazon: www.amazon.com...
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Allowing Magnificence; Living the Expanded Version of Your Life
www.amazon.com...

[@SlimBombshell]

Be with someone who is just as excited about you, as you are about them... saves you time, energy, and heartache.

[@genna2586]

Exactly right! Trust your instincts and feel you are valued!

[@nikhatpathan]

Wish it was so easy to move on... 😭

[@zaink7037]

@@nikhatpathan can relate man. At least you've accepted to move on which is great. I'm currently feeling the same way and wish we can stop feeling heartbroken and move on

[@krystaalese8067]

I was so certain he was just as crazy about me as I was about him... I actually felt like he was MORE crazy about me than I was about him.... but he left me

[@SlimBombshell]

@@krystaalese8067 you just have to invest less Intially until he does...

[@coachbahman]

Don’t wait for anyone who’s already moved on..

[@1881eagle]

Don't wait, because life sure ain't waiting to happen. Plus the longer you wait, more opportunities will pass by. "You are too concerned about what was and what will be. There is a saying: yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, but today is a gift. That is why it is called the "present." -Kung Fu Panda quote.

[@tarashan5465]

Thats what im doing! Im so stupid

[@sammysam2615]

Always move on. Even if they need time career wise or anything, you always move on. If they catch up and want to chase you and earn you, then they have to do it. Moving on Doesn't mean never later. Remember your happiness is paramount not negotiable

[@angel53453]

I really appreciate your comment, thank you 😔

[@meganxotchilt]

love this

[@realdavidjones1623]

Very wise advice

[@Xtina2525]

I don’t wait for anyone period. If we were supposed to be together we would be!

[@dustyandmax2239]

Agree...if you give an inch...someone may make you wait a mile...waited for someone 3 years...no more!!

[@zaink7037]

@@dustyandmax2239 Best you move on cecilia. I was living in hope for 4 years after college that I might see the girl I liked again and that something might work out between us. A few weeks ago I bumped into my friend who told me he thinks she's married now. I think if I put it in myself 4 years back to move on from her I probably wouldn't feel so heartbroken now. Thankfully I'm not depressed or have been crying about it but god I just want to move on without getting sadness and anger creep in about her

[@lisajones4150]

TRUE,IF IT WAS MEANT TO BE ( YOU WOULD BE TOGETHER)I'M NOT ( WAITING)✔

[@PricelessBinkey1337]

Plus why we waiting? You know you aint the only person they talking to

[@aksharsolanki328]

@@zaink7037 4 years is a really long time bro. I can't imagine for such a long time a person holds himself to just one girl he likes, just to get hurt in the end.

[@rubas4403]

Your time is valuable.... correct

[@sarastarski]

« I don’t want to hurt you » it’s such a lame line! It’s basically preparing someone to be hurt and then they have an excuse « but I told you... » If you don’t want to hurt someone don’t hurt her/him! Period As always great video ❤️ 🙏🏻

[@nerdincognitosue3560]

Excellent comment Sara! It's so true!

[@kimberlyjones8152]

@@TheGalactica2001 same. He also said "you deserve better" which made me madder cause that meant that he acknowledged his shortcomings and refused to change... Sadly, its been a little over 3 years and i highly doubt hes changed unless hes had an epiphany moment😒 people have to want to change

[@nehabedi1775]

Why’d you wanna be with someone who is not prepared & not willing to seize the thing they want the most .! Maybe you ain’t it; maybe they’re weak; whatever it is just get outta there. Don’t hurt yourself anymore by being into this .... you’ve got your whole life in front of you..

[@ratiphoenix3479]

I just love people who love me back, I'm just interested in people who are interested in me. I live like that :D no more mistakes and weaknesses ♥️

[@nehabedi1775]

If they wanted you they’d work for it PERIOD do not trust words I repeat ONLY TRUST ACTIONS THEYLL TELL U EVERY SINGLE THING U NEED TO KNOW

[@JM-kd1mr]

Please move on. Always, always move on. Energetically move on. Don't just be busy moving on.

[@talondaecckles8524]

I have learned don't waste time with time waisters no matter how much u like some1. U will be missing out on getting what u need an deserve. An it's a waist of your love that can be given where needed. Life is short have happy connections or keep it moving. Happiness can be around the corner but u can never know stuck where u shouldn't be

[@devonrex4959]

So so soooo true!!!

[@jessiewattenhofer8583]

Good piece of advice!

[@empressqi1722]

Beautifully written

[@misslanapford9169]

U should never wait for anyone. Live you best life and do the things you want, if u officially broke up then test the water and date other people.. if the other person comes back then great if they don't you have made something for yourself..

[@keithfraser3219]

Miss Lana. M. Hudson I agree only if it is officially broken up.

[@misslanapford9169]

@@keithfraser3219 Ya been there, had that done to... the keep you around just in case it doesn't work out with everyone else..

[@PamelaNam]

You know, keeping the presentation under 10minutes is what makes you much viewed. We want the goods straight and simple. Your nice clothes, attractive figure, and model home with adorable pet, cause us to want to visit you, too often. Then, you got the gift, you speak from the heart and know what you are saying. You really mean to contribute to the wellness of humanity. Thank you, I feel privileged in having discovered your Chanel!

[@rev.jimjonesandthekool-aid4488]

100% agree.

[@dorahaymond4061]

Add me to the grateful ☺

[@TheKapias]

Dated a widower for 15mos! Never affectionate when I asked why he said he’d been married a long(27years) time! She died 5 years ago this month! I’ve decided I’ve waited long enough and changed my phone number and won’t talk to him anymore! I’m told I’m being cruel!? But I don’t see anything getting any better, he can be cruel and tries to control me! I’ve decided I really don’t miss him or need him! Been a little over a month! Thank you for your help!💃🏻💃🏻💃🏻❤️❤️

[@devonrex4959]

We've got our lives to live, dreams to achieve and love to give so why should we put ourselves on hold for someone?? Time waits for no-one!

[@TheKapias]

Amen!

[@TheMissAlira]

I lost my husband, but I would never make alive person (if I care about him to wait for very long time like 5 years). Of course there should be grieving period, but if he cares about you he will let you in his life sooner or later.

[@itcbcc]

move on and never look back

[@peternorthrup6274]

When in doubt. Throw them out. Life is too short. Let another guy put up with her. To many great girls out there that would love to meet a guy that will treat her like gold. And her in return.

[@dustyandmax2239]

Thanks to you, Susan ....I know the answer.... never wait too long for someone that is not sure about you! I always enjoy your videos. 🌺 Life is short!

[@SusanWinter]

Thank you for your support!

[@Reilly5]

I'm the extreme example of waiting in vain. I waited 26 years for a final chance with a person I had known all my life until this point. It was a complicated relationship, and it ended in an emotional nuclear explosion. My life is a barren wasteland polluted by radiation. I'm to blame, and I have to clean it up by myself... I don't even know if it's worth it to clean it up. I feel like by the time I do, I'll die from radiation poisoning.

[@zaink7037]

Hope your better than then Reilly. I used to like a girl in school which I'm sure liked me back but we weren't in an open relationship. We stopped seeing each other after college. I thought I'll get back in contact when we graduate from university and start our careers. Sadly several months ago I found she got married to someone in her family and dropped all her studies and her career. I was heartbroken but I'm slowly moving on. She didn't meet my expectations which I use to help me move on but it takes time to move on and not care about them. I just start caring about myself and focus on my life goals to be successful in my life

[@Reilly5]

@@zaink7037 I am doing better. It's been over 9 months, and am functional again. It was the worst pain I've ever experienced, and healing over a pandemic breakup made it way harder. The positive of this situation is that I realized how messed up I am, and tried therapy once more, and finally got the help and support I've needed. Sometimes everything falls apart. I'm glad you also found peace. I appreciate this supportive comment!

[@Shaunteetalkstv]

That’s deep ❤. I hope you’re in a better environment.

[@annieportier3584]

Such wisdom and yet common sense. Thank-you for educating us!! Congratulations on your 10 millon!!

[@janetswain2354]

I had to break it off with a man i dearly love. He said he loved me but seldom backed his words with actions. Talk really is cheap. But now i have a broken heart

[@kimturner9309]

Janet Swain how are you doing now?❤️

[@nehabedi1775]

I’ve to force him to communicate man it’s so exhausting!!!!!!! Feels like I’m a fool over there trying to fix things that aren’t even there. I try to be so calm and wanna talk because I know how important it is, stupid me

[@Th3Fab3]

omg thank you this makes it so clear. I've been struggling with this for months. I get breadcrumbs, although I don't initiate. Here's a step forward to healing. He's tried to "get in" again bc of work. I wasn't feeling it...I mean 2.5 mos of rarely no communication and only once telling me what's going on since the last time we talked. I wish he'd get out of my head faster!

[@aprilshowerzzzz2691]

the timing of this! thank you so much for your wisdom from a 15 year old learning about love and experiences!

[@devonrex4959]

Susan Winter is a very wise woman with lots of very valuable advice! Excellent choice you made to choose to listen to her videos. 👍😁

[@Nicole-is-global]

Seriously, her timing is always impressive.

[@redlotusqueen]

Omg Susan, I love how passionate you are about what you do! It's so apparent in your videos. You're refreshingly straightforward and compassionate. A new subscriber here!

[@SusanWinter]

A few months late, but welcome!

[@LX12399]

10million views 👏🏼 well deserved 🙌🏽

[@SusanWinter]

Thank you LG. YOu're a part of this too!

[@misslanapford9169]

Definitely.. I'm a new subscriber and love and enjoy this page.

[@mariannakrejniuk6858]

Hi Susan, you're totally right that the progress is important. If there's really no progress at all, after a certain amount of time you can ask yourself if it's worth continuing this relationship or not. But it's a free choice.

[@stevemellin5806]

You're the best . Helped me very much .IAM back to being myself .wow a narcissist can really. Mess with the mind . thank you again .☺️

[@CorporateQueen]

Lord, move on. I waited whilst he was going through his legal case with his children and he told me he wouldn't have got into a relationship if he'd known how bad the legal stuff was going to be. He never really kept me in the loop. He was treading water. Coward. "Busy'' is an asshole excuse.

[@lalinmoon3610]

"busy is an asshole excuse." 💯💯💯

[@77pax]

You always make so much sense. I get so much out of your videos. Thank you! ❤

[@SusanWinter]

thank you 777pax

[@cherylduckworth8185]

I have someone I think quite a bit of. We were having a blast together but he needed time to think. I didn't get in this way because I never want to make anybody feel trapped. He called tonight and wants to get back together. I'll tell you that no contact thing really works. Not sure how the story is going to end but it shocked me to my core that he wants to come back. I really thought I would never see him again 😔

[@davinaetwaroo]

Congrats on hitting 10 million+ views...well-deserved! You answered the exact question I was mulling over in my mind, dealing with vagueness. I feel stronger and more at ease in my decision to move on. Thanks!

[@andreanicolewatson8369]

Congrats to 10MM and to 10 more! So grateful to have found your channel!

[@nailslovr9378]

I swear, Susan has a video for all of my relationship questions.

[@nailslovr9378]

And wow yeah I agree with the time frame, I say 2-3 months is long enough to figure out if it can work. Sometimes shorter...

[@donnieluc6830]

I'm the most self-aware man you could ever meet, yet I've been searching for insight to a confusing relationship; finally some clarity! It explained alot! I realize not everyone is effected, but regarding studies on the effects of oxytocin: "the love hormone." After about 10 months of soul searching; a scientific grasp on this insane feeling called love. Dang! What the heck? It's a chemical?!?!? Somehow I knew it. A bonding hormone! Makes you lose your mind! Dang!

[@rameshmurugaiyah5824]

In other words, it's a drug. What a pity it's been romantized. Love, what an addiction. It can make a sane man turn into a monster. Unless you learn to understand it, which I have yet to do.

[@kaylasheppard7746]

This is the lovey dovey "love", which to me isn't real love. Real love is a choice and an action, not a feeling and a reaction. The "falling in love" feeling fades, the real love comes through commitment and selflessness.

[@Oceanusnovas-um2zf]

@@kaylasheppard7746 Best comment. Couldn't agree with you more.

[@Agnusdei515]

For that matter, waiting is expecting. Dont expect then u have nothing to wait for

[@moubhattacharyay6891]

I Only Depend On My Own Soul None Other Than Anything Can Shake It.. Moving On Means To Me If "I HEALED IN THERE, THEN STEP FORWARD" 😊

[@p.rabbitt4914]

Susan- Thank you for helping out us gay guys! Not a lot of people out there tackle these situations. A lot of support is needed right now.

[@bertierobinson-murphy6794]

Congratulations Susan x Wise woman and blessed to have found you .

[@SusanWinter]

Thank you so much for the support, Bertie! Take care

[@artemis4756]

Just fell in love with you and your videos.. you are so clear and strong in your opinions and what you expect from a relationship.. I'm lightyears away from this but learning everyday.. thank you so much!!! Hope one day I will be as strong as you are..

[@SusanWinter]

You are too sweet! Thank you for your support!

[@gabspublicdiary2192]

Don’t never wait on nooobody

[@sandralujan1199]

How do we use this during the Pandemic? Waiting and being patient with someone.

[@k.w.1459]

Every word you speak here is amazingly correct! Love you, Susan. Congrats!

[@SusanWinter]

Thanks so much!

[@samiranchowdhury1806]

Mother it is we viewers who should thank you for your service to mankind.

[@SusanWinter]

Thank you for your support!

[@ezracheng2612]

this video gave me a lot of peace of mind. Thank you Susan!

[@jamiebowden1739]

Congratulations on the views. I watch faithfully. You have changed my life tremendously. Love ya Susan. Keep the videos coming. 😚❤️

[@SusanWinter]

That is too sweet! Thank you for your support!

[@tuff47]

I'm the kind of person that never liked playing mental games with females. I normally just walk away.

[@diegocaramanico3866]

Your welcome Susan... I have watched many of the your videos, you have helped me to see things more clearly when dealing with broken down relationships and I do realise my self worth.. Thank you for all your wisdom you are a truely remarkable couch...

[@SusanWinter]

Thank you for your support, Diego!

[@barbarawilson3153]

I would never wait for a very long time for a man life is too short

[@lisaalger4988]

I LOVE this woman (Susan Winter)! She just answered a burning question I have on a "shy guy" who we have chemistry! THANK YOU!!!!!!

[@SusanWinter]

I'm so glad my advice helped you. Thank you for your support, Lisa!

[@jesuiself]

You are great, Susan! Thank you for all what you do !

[@SusanWinter]

Thank you for your suport! It means a lot.

[@mdk2338]

Congratulations... God bless you for helping millions... I too like your perception, counseling....keep it up....

[@SusanWinter]

Thank you for your support, Mary!

[@myqueen_RegineVelasquez]

I know I am too late for this but still: CONGRATULATIONS for the milestone! I always loved listening to your advice. I really find it calming especially I am what they call "professional overthinker." 😅 More power to you and your team. - A fan from Philippines. 🌻

[@deezneez-azmysoulbreakzfre749]

Congratulations Susan🍾🎉 Thank you. You are my Goto for guidance.

[@SusanWinter]

Thank you so much for your support!

[@renatob9909]

Be clear what you want! Do you want to linger or do you want a relationship?

[@Remer20]

Congratulations Susan. Your videos have really captivated me this year.

[@SusanWinter]

Thank you for the support, Michael!

[@Laughwithmeoratme]

Every time you post a video Susan it's almost as if it's speaking directly to me and my exact situation that I have going on I appreciate your videos so much they always seem to hit the nail right on the head and I am so grateful 4 them! It's almost as if every time I watch your video I think ,"does she know what I'm going through because this is exactly what I'm going through!" Love you!

[@atlanta7432]

Susan, I loove this one! Just amazing

[@azmike3572]

1:49: Hard to turn the ship around...right... think of an aircraft carrier or a multi-story cruise ship...not like pulling a u-turn...

[@sarazink2237]

Wonderful video and at the time I needed it the most! I am goin through a huge transition in my life and unsure of how to handle my dating relationships due to the fact I will be moving out of state! Thanks for the clarity!🙏🏻

[@SusanWinter]

Hello Sara, Thank you for your comment! Take care

[@michaelwu5515]

This helps me a lot thank you Susan.

[@hamilton9651]

I moved on years ago, and I've never been back since!

[@andrealandry9692]

Thank you so much again for timely advice Susan☺️❤️🌸

[@SusanWinter]

Any time!

[@Hookahman-rp8nq]

Damn, this is the best advice I have heard in a while!

[@paolomartini150]

Thanks for your videos. In this particular case there are situations where one may have to extend that time. In my case I tried and turned out to be a waste. But I had to in this particular case.

[@linnaewillis8737]

Woo hoo! Congrats Susan , you do give great advice, and you're content is very insightful.

[@SusanWinter]

Thank you so much for your support!

[@myrahouse2368]

Its because your good Susanne.

[@keithfraser3219]

I have waited almost 3 months and I’m waiting. She is in a holistic healing facility and I haven’t talked to her in 11 weeks. 1 more to go.

[@saidaelkebir7383]

Hello Susan well done ! On to the next milestone. 💗

[@SusanWinter]

Much appreciated, Said

[@user-iw2lf4lc9y]

Good video Susan. Met someone online - we have been chatting since November but then they met someone else then broke up and we met up in person about 6 weeks ago. We live quite far from each other. Initially intense experience together then she gives the line of “ don’t want to hurt you, just got out a relationship and don’t want to hurt you - not sure am ready to jump into something else but want to get to know you” etc blah blah.... so now I am wary as feel I am an ‘ option’ until she is or isnt ready. She’s already expressed her reservations over long distance relationships etc. We have a great connection but am I safer in just keeping her as a friend instead of getting my hopes up?

[@ShelleyG1014]

We love you Susan!

[@SusanWinter]

Thank you, Michele. You are too sweet!

[@marii_lilmonsta]

Thank you Susan ❤️

[@brendasweet7205]

Your very good speaker Counsler

[@robdandapani9303]

I'm going through this situation. Hooked up from Tinder and after all the wonderful sex previous night, comes this line the next day: "Maybe we are not right for each other". What??? Why???? How???

[@eatermckinnon4644]

i went thru that a few weeks ago. But i was on the other end. It was because the chemistry and XXX was really bad and I wasn't really into them that much. Even with the alcohol, I barely wanted to do it.

[@robdandapani9303]

@@eatermckinnon4644 Hahaha 😂

[@foreverlovehijau4428]

I want to move on,, maam susan. I wont wait

[@samiranchowdhury1806]

Welcome,Mother.Tell us how to make this channel increase more viewership and get more subscriptions?

[@Dreamsareareality]

You are amazing!! Congrats

[@SusanWinter]

Thank you so much!

[@danielaionescu4708]

Here I lie after lie and 8 months pass by. Thank God it over now, thanks to your video and my best friend. My gut also tell something is not right but I ignore it...

[@maryrose1701]

What if they say its done over move on . Do they mean it or are they playing games after 26 years of marriage ????? And i made a mistake on leaving him i want him back its been 6 months . I did get him out of the anger stage . he will talk to me now . I call him once a week but i need more from him he doesnt call me at all its killing me this is so slow

[@sindhusekar1918]

Instead of thinking of it as break up, imagine that he’s dead. Mourn his death. Bury the memories (good and bad). Move on. Take care of yourself (because no one else will).

[@veronicav1779]

Congratulations ! Great advice as always on this currently very pertinent issue for me...not good news you give great clarity much gratitude x

[@Julio-ez2np]

Months or a year. 😲 And I waited 7 years for someone that didn't show any progress, neither mentioned to do anything. I wish I heard this before. But is good for the next time

[@emmywise1603]

@Julio 😭😭😭😭😭. Am sorry for that.

[@sandym3239]

Perfect, as always. 💕

[@SusanWinter]

You are too kind, Sandy. Thank you for your support!

[@MDBrnRaisdRDotFlynn]

Thanks!

[@SusanWinter]

And you are very welcome!

[@Lapastel37]

Always sound advice. Thank you

[@SusanWinter]

Thank you for the support!

[@My_randoms01]

You are good......thanks

[@infinitywarrior1017]

Sussann thee besssttt!!!

[@SusanWinter]

Thanks Infinitie Warrior.

[@sarahsophia4070]

Loving your videos, Susan! Thank you for sharing your wisdom and expertise... Susan, I would like to present a question -- one that you might address on one of these videos. I don't think you have covered it yet... How might I do that?? Thank you!! XOXO

[@SusanWinter]

Hello Sarah, thank you for your support! I will have some polls coming up on the Community page and my IG @susanwinter

[@radionina]

Love to hear this

[@mdmmalou]

A wise woman is a woman of 10.000.000 :-) Congratulations!

[@dewitt3453]

She’s the first woman who showed me attraction in a sexual/Romantic way, I don’t know what I should do. She likes two different guys me and this other guy and she chose him, I’ve been feeling horrible the past week and I don’t know if I should move on or wait around. She said I’m the smart choice just her feelings were telling her that guy while her head was telling her me. We still talk about getting together regularly and I don’t know if I should wait or not.

[@tomulator]

NEVER lower yourself below another person. Go live your life and you’ll meet someone else.👍🏼

[@user-dv5ki3ke9c]

Thank you so much

[@nehabedi1775]

He cares for me like anything, and we do everything a couple would, just without the tag. I don’t know why he’s so afraid of committing! We literally have been doing all the stuff, have real feeling & care for each other the most; also top on priorities (that is both ways) . What’s the deal man . I’m so confused

[@doreenmorales7183]

I am 61 and single, is not too late for me to find someone? Too many liers on sites. Should i give up??? Or where can i find someone?

[@devonrex4959]

We all can find that someone! Susan has a short video about online dating. She's very spot-on. It takes persistance, resilience and keeping your wits about you. Its well worth a watch. Please dont be disheartened. In life, we win some and we lose some! If you focus on the times that you win, you will see that you start to win more!! 💗😁

[@terrymondon7649]

I love your videos❤❤❤❤🙏

[@rmemba405]

Great video. Thanks.....and you look beautiful Susan Winter. 😍☺️

[@SusanWinter]

Thank you so much, Ria!

[@icxcnika123]

Solid advice!

[@SusanWinter]

Thank you for your support!

[@gratitude5740]

Susan, what do you think about a long distance relationship with a man who is younger and from a different culture . It has been 18 months. We supposed to meet but I could not go and his visitors visa was denied . His work - seasonal becomes an obstacle to our frequent daily/ hourly contact . Now we talk on a weekly basis and I’m not satisfied. I want him to show me commitment through communication and consistency. I feel I’m not his priority . He says he is trying his level best to be in touch.

[@jammyjay917]

Great advice.... 😊

[@SusanWinter]

Thank you for your support, Jay!

[@casperinsight3524]

B suspicious of vague 👌

[@SivaKumar-pf3ze]

Yes she was trading water with me..

[@sarahbonnin140]

Hey Susan, can you please do a video about whats your definition of insecurity? I met a guy few weeks back and at the first date we had a good time but he wasn’t showing me a lot of interest, not really talking, not wanting to go out really and when I would ask him what he is doing or where he is and why he doesnt talk a lot he would say that it’s not true and that I am insecure I just don’t understand it. I don’t think I am insecure or a jealous kind of person..could you help?