A letter to myself ten years ago

[@i.gaskoid]

Takes a lot of courage to open up to us about this kind of stuff, Simon, and I’m sure I can speak for the majority here when I say that we’re all super proud of you. All I can say is that I’m so happy that you’re *talking* about feelings and emotions, and bringing all of this to the surface, because it’s so important to communicate before it bottles up! And I hope you do get the respite you deserve because your mental state matters a hell of a lot to us! If anything, when you were starting to make videos, I was doing my A Levels and in a very, very similar situation. By accepting some things I was doing as a problem, you partly inspired me to change how I communicate my emotions and asking for help once I got to university, and it’s changed my academic and professional future. This turned into an essay. Oops. You’re doing really well, and your honesty and tenacity is inspirational. I hope things get better for you in the near future, and thanks for everything you do for us.

[@atriacharya2967]

Very well said! He is a true hero for aspiring researchers, anywhere in the world.

[@tusharkumarraj6066]

@@adams6412 she was talking about that depression part

[@James-zs3vm]

You drove me to academia, and took me to a mathematics degree which I love. I know there is a bumpy road ahead of me, and I wish I could see my own ten year reflection from the future "me". I am eternally grateful for yours and all of educational KZbin's guidance so far, you are a strong man for admitting you have been unwell and I wish you the best for the future. To the next ten years!

[@abijo5052]

If you don't mind btw where are you studying? And what tips to you have starting a maths degree. I'm in Y13 and have applied to study maths next year at uni

[@zetch972]

Abijo .

[@snookergaming6295]

69likes xd

[@fizzybubblyify]

This is your best video by far, apprecieate the honesty.

[@MiniLuv-1984]

"Give me time" - sure, absolutely no problem. Take all the time you want/need, I'll be here when you get back.

[@thomsonkatie]

This video felt like it was me speaking to me?? I have recently started my PhD (just kind of stumbled into it naturally after my Master's as I enjoy research...) and constantly feel like I shouldn't be there despite everyone around me telling me I am more than capable.. Thank you for this. Great video.

[@nickymorris7393]

Snap haha

[@JonathanCorversProfiel]

When I was severely depressed and struggling to get myself to ask for help. These kinds of videos helped tremendously. I want you to know that. Making videos on this topic is useful and you don't have to feel guilty about making money off of it. Very specific for those whose mental health issues are related to incessant worrying about the state of the world: even though it sometimes feels incredibly small, taking part in activism really helps me.

[@emilebrandes1569]

Simon, I retired ten years ago and have been following you on Utube when my son handed me his old phone. I had discovered sixty symbols by Brady Haran, onto Sally le page and to your channel. You had just started your ph d degree. It has been enjoyable and enthralling and I learned a lot with a lot of fun especially the choir. Thanks a lot, Emile Brandes, p s look after yourself retired GP who who worked in mental health for a year in acute psychiatric care for adults and geriatrics.

[@elizanix]

Dr. Simon We love you And your post opening up the other week was inspiring. You've got this!

[@daria1832]

Man, you just pronounced the words I really needed right now, the rightest words at the rightest moment.

[@lisanne4687]

You make me cry because I feel cared for and hopefull, optimistic. And I want to give you a hug.

[@llabyrinthinessoul]

I've watched you since I was like 14 when I was starting to get interested in physics. I'm almost 22 now and physics is absolutely not what I'm doing and I haven't watched your videos in years but you really were so inspiring to me back then, I would watch all your videos. Something in me today made me click this video. I was like "oh Simon? I wonder how he's doing, I need to watch this." I'm glad I did. I'm glad you're getting help. Health will always be the most important thing. Take care

[@oldclem_]

Thank you so much. I started watching your videos at the end of high school and through sixth form, and I got into Oxford from a state comp (obviously in part thanks to your content), but earlier this year, after Hilary of my 3rd year of a 4-year course, I took some time off, but I don't think I'll be going back. Over this, like, 9 months of only waking up and then sleeping again, it's been all too easy to do nothing, but to see you work through things in your own way, perhaps, like years earlier, I should follow in your footsteps.. But anyway, "obligatory long comment aside," I hope you continue to find a healthy balance and us, your audience, are entirely behind you (but at a nice, not intimidating distance...)

[@AllAboutScience]

I am really glad that you talked it out, mental health is really a big issue. As a viewer, I think its more important for creators to make videos that are genuine rather than forced positive or perfect in every way. It's a topic which Pewdiepie talks about in his video "Forced Positivity". Thank you for such an honest video!

[@yash-sri]

Whenever I feel sad, I always come back to this video. Thanks for being an inspiration Simon.

[@-myhcroft-8475]

Thanks Simon. I'm a high school student and I have been messed up like this for two years.

[@quantumbits]

We love you Simon.

[@alimuhammadbaig5054]

For the first couple of minutes I was like "What the heck is he saying about me?". then I realized that it was about himself! We are proud of you Simon. Just keep working hard Following you from the very beginning!

[@faboo811]

THANK YOU FOR THIS! I'm a phyiscs grad student and feel very similar, the imposter syndrome is killing me. You motivate me to get the help I need and shoul not be embarrassed about. Talking about this openly is hard, and by doing so you're making a change. Keep on being a great and inspiring person!

[@ThePrimevalVoid]

Take as much time as you need, Simon. I'll be here.

[@zainsiddiqi]

Hey man, this was such a lovely video, I was in a bad place in my first year in 17-18 and I've been watching you since my A-Levels, when you were in undergrad, I even wrote about your videos in my personal statement. Your channel has been a joy to watch and I look forward to watching your videos and tune in to your streams when I can. Your journey has been a joy to follow and you opening up like this is sure to help everyone who watches this. Thank you for these and I hope you continue to do what you love

[@historymysteries4134]

I really feel for you, Simon. I’m a similar ago to you and I would love to say similar things about anxiety to my 18 year old self. Do what’s right for you. Your back catalogue is here to keep the wheels turning until you are ready.

[@danjohnson7284]

You’re the reason I decided to go to uni Simon, the summer before starting I watched your PhD journey constantly, I’m now in my 3rd year, and starting a masters degree once I have graduated, thank you for everything Simon, you’ve done more than you know for so many people.

[@hanneke3979]

We're all very proud of you! I'm in a similar boat and seeing someone I look up to be open about this gives me hope

[@annayuelee5639]

all of a sudden i realized who is this really written for. thank you for being so genuine

[@letsmakeithappen56]

“This Is Water” by David Foster Wallace. He talks about how the thing that people care about will consume them. It’s a great speech.

[@josephbrennan370]

Extremely eloquent. Thank you for opening up to us. Will probably be helpful for many of us.

[@antistory3771]

I wish you the best of luck healing. I admire you for being able to speak out and act, because YOU deserve to be healthy.

[@bludragonproject9677]

It takes a strong , albiet sonewhat different person to even admit to themselves they need help. It's a pure joy to find one that is so adamant about doing such they tell the world! As one who is in the business of counseling, I commend your stance! Bravo!

[@maurocometrue]

Humans perfectly imperfect... That's what we are and I'm glad to know that you had the courage to admit it, since you have inspired me (and us) to talk openly about it. Getting into any PhD may be as hard as go through it, yet, you're history inspire me to overcome 18 rejections to PhD programs and still keep trying it. Now that I'm in the other side, I'm going through the same situation as you and it feels ineffable to know that I'm a human being like you.

[@ThoughtofthedayYT]

This video is what I needed and what a lot of people needed. Thank you

[@orfeasliossatos]

I wear my “to do calculate” shirt whenever I feel like I can use a little luck on my side when I sit my exams :) You should do whatever needs doing to help yourself! Thank you Simon

[@robincheah7001]

Somehow I can relate what you said on so many levels. Each time I click your video, I have the tendancy to watch till the end and I find that it's worth the time spent watching. Taking my PhD now and juggling between a few things here and there. Am a psych major, but I dived into comms, which I have to idea why. Probably because I think it is where I could find out more about where the dollars generated. But hey, all I wanted to say is your message is clear, empowering and resonating. Yes, like all the others said, it takes courage to open up about yourself and I really respect and admire you for that. Not sure if you'll be reading this among the 200+ comments, but if you do, just want to say, please take care of yourself, like how you are helping your subscribers online. Thanks mate.

[@maccabee7]

I don’t know if you ever read Surprised by Joy by C.S. Lewis. If you would like to explore the wider philosophical aspects of why we sometimes feel the way we do, you may want to consider reading Surprised by Joy. It might seem tangential at first, but it tells the story of C.S. Lewis, and deals with themes that many of us have really struggled with.

[@w00dy778]

Simon this is a great example to all of us who have struggled or are struggling now with our mental health. Talking it out is the first step on what might be a long climb out of the valley. Stay strong, keep going, and be mindful of how far you've come til now if you take another dip

[@ghale6632]

Thank you for this. Brought me to tears due to the resonance I felt with your experience.

[@benbriggs7897]

Simon I would just like to say Thankyou not only because your videos particularly your day in the life vlogs inspired me to really try in academia and to work as hard as I can but more importantly for the way you communicate dealing with stress and mental health in relation to education and academia a real role model and someone I really look up to would just like to say congratulations on 10 years on you tube and Thankyou for showing that we are all human and that we need to look after ourselves to 👍

[@ioanahayman]

Hey Simon, I've been watching your videos since your time at Oxford and just realized that I'm going through a journey shockingly similar to yours in every way - with KZbin, university, and the highs and lows of coming to peace with my own value. Just want to say that you're an exceptional person and inspire me and so many others. I hope that stepping away will give you the clarity to own that worth. It's there regardless of how much you accomplish. Wishing you all the best with wherever you're headed to next! Also, this video could not have come at a better time to impact my life as well. Thank you so much.

[@foajfukemiplfu]

Hi Simon, Just wanted to say that I this resonated with me in a way that was really helpful. I'm currently doing an undergraduate in Oxford and a lot of these issues are all to common. I know so many people who think the Oxford support network isn't for them (my past self included) and that's something the services themselves want to fight. Anyway thank you for being so open, getting the language to express these feelings out there is half the battle ♥️

[@pmgcls11]

So much love your way, Simon. Take your time, your wellbeing is important.

[@vimalakirtilotus4611]

Thank you for sharing so much private experience, that make me feel I am not the only one who feel difficulty in my career.

[@barbaraluizasilvasantiago2212]

I am a Ph.D. student and felt like this 'old self' could have been me a few years from now. So thank you very much for your honesty. This video certainly will help me to have a better life. (I am Brazilian, so sorry if I did not make myself clear. I needed to say something despite the language).

[@raphaeldesbordes2217]

Thank you for this video in which you made yourself vulnerable about what you felt and are feeling. It resonnates with my experience. I had a hard time last year and it is getting better. But I still need to contanstly put my mental health as my priority which is not always easy for me. Thank you for contributing to this movement of mental health awareness !

[@dianakino1132]

I have just started KZbin I was watching your vids for very long time ago, you are really doing well My dream was to live in Oxford, and here I am I live here study at Brookes and thanks to you for the inspiration . Don’t look outside of yourself for healing, have more time for yourself, seek peace and happiness within ❤️💜

[@galenjones7745]

Simon, thank you. Thank you for being you, and thank you for understanding that you deserve better.

[@christine-xs6lx]

I'm just sitting and crying because I go through the similar things and this is so sad. Thanks for the talk, that's really important to know that you are not alone with this problem and that mental problems really exist (because everyone around me tries to find 'the explanation' of my feelings and emotions and I feel miserable). Send you my support and love 💜

[@yashodabhattarai4206]

Thank you so much for this video with such an amazing message😃👍👏 This is really helpful

[@stephaniefrost9720]

Only 5 minutes into the video and I resonate very hard. I’m a 3rd year undergraduate studying chemistry and French and man do I feel burnt out. I fell in love with organic chemistry last year and was *sure* I wanted to at least go further in it to see if I truly love it. I’m taking basically a beginning graduate level class (so mostly 3rd, 4th year undergrads and some 1st year grads) and it got hard fast. I lost all I confidence I developed in my first year of organic and don’t resonate with the professor and I’m doing very poorly in the class. It’s currently finals week and I just want this week to be over, even though by not studying right now I’m only hurting myself more. I also took a break from research which I don’t even know if I like and the advice I receive is so cliche and bland I don’t know what to do. I don’t even know what I like anymore academic wise...I used to really want to go to graduate school but everyone seems so...sad. I started what’s basically a “baby” teaching assistant job and fell in love with it, hence why I stopped research because I can only handle so much. But if I want a teaching career i still need a PhD. I’m so frustrated and feel as if no one is really helping me. I have no confidence in my scientific skills at all and I have to constantly hear “just think like a scientist/organic chemist” which hurts me because I think like myself not anyone else. It’s like I’m not even worthy of being a chemist dare I even call myself one.😓 I know these feelings won’t last forever because I’ve had similar experiences to this before, but this semester has just felt so heavy I just want a break from all things university related😞

[@OskarHellstroem]

Thank you for this important video Simon. Take care of yourselves folks!

[@fatmaalwahaibi3191]

Thank you Simon for sharing this with us. I am quite fascinated about the timing of your video!!! honestly I needed to hear this... My college work is really overwhelming!!! I feel that I am running out of time and no matter how I do I am not happy.... but then I taught my self that whenever I feel lost... I would go and talk to my parents.... because I know that through their eyes I can see my true reflection. You are absolutely right when you said go and ask for help! I swear talking to someone who cares about you... would make you feel better. Thanks again Simon.

[@summanus4437]

I'm still touched you opened up to us about your issues. This kind of thing can only be truly overcome when it's addressed and confronted. Your ten year anniversary is a fitting end to this period of turmoil. It's a new start, the beginning of a new chapter. A garden flourishes best when the weeds have been removed and the seeds nurtured. Thankfully, decaying matter makes for a good fertiliser, and from the old can spring forth the new. You deserve to enjoy good health, a prosperous, beautiful garden if you will, because clearly the alternative simply doesn't work. Also "lumps of plastic crack" is the best description for GW miniatures I've heard in a while.

[@Sammy8847]

Thanks for sharing. Thanks for... caring. Thanks for showing me how to be earnest and honest in confronting problems I'd rather put off. // You're really special person, Simon, deserving of love and respect. The thousands of us from all over the world who subscribe and watch your videos are a testament to that. Best wishes on your journey in overcoming self-doubt. You got this!

[@ameebhatt3588]

Dear Simon, I watched this video when it was released. I searched for this video now and found it so helpful. As you said, i came to a sudden realisation that i am unwell and its hell of a big task to open up the wounds that were buried while talking about it, but its worth it. Thank you for making me realise again that i am not alone and its okay to not feel well and take some time off. Thank you.🙏

[@CyberneticOrigins]

Thank you so much for the openness. Though I love your videos, I will support your health over any video or 'content' output. Every time. I wish you the very best, and I will be your viewer if/when you return.

[@Zedstergal]

Hi Simon. I'm really sorry to hear that you've been having a hard time but I'm really glad you made this video - well done! Hopefully it will really help others out there who feel the same way as you. Also, this video is basically my PhD, as you know, which is really quite useful. So thank for that. Zxx

[@TheJamesEarly]

Really well made video Simon, mental health is certainly a serious issue and you should take all the time you need for you to feel comfortable creating videos again! I've recently been going through a rough patch but re watching your videos instills motivation for me to carry on, that may sound slightly odd but you're a massive inspiration to me. I hope things get better for you soon!

[@hanayuzon]

You inspired us Dr. Simon (finally Dr!) I am just so thankful and happy for you. Keep learning, inspiring and be inspired all the more (T_T) We are always rooting for you~ *insert virtual cheerleading squad*

[@wohfab]

Thank you so so very much, Simon!

[@galacticcowboy7819]

Thank you. I know this was a letter to yourself but it's exactly what I needed to hear at this point in my life. God bless, and I wish all the best for you.

[@albauroman]

You’re definitely not alone, I relate to this video and to your blog post a lot. It’s been a long and painful journey but the good news is after years, and I mean around 10 years if not more, of feeling like something wasn’t right, I finally went to counselling for the first time a couple of months ago. It was a short 6-session counselling period to begin with and while it certainly didn’t fix all of my problems, the good news is that attending those sessions and taking a few other steps has certainly helped in making me feel better. I still haven’t managed to figure out how to talk about it properly really, but I’m working on that. I guess writing about it here to someone who may understand is a way of doing that for me. I feel like university life was a huge component of me personally feeling this way even though it wasn’t just that. I’m kind of stuck in a weird place now where I need to choose whether I want to go on to do a Masters and PhD program in a topic that I think is hugely important and I care about personally but a part of me feels like I don’t know if that’s the right thing for my mental health. But I also don’t know if leaving university would make it any better. I don’t know if I have it in me to go on for 4 more years of the same kind of lifestyle. I think the isolation was also huge for me and the whole imposter syndrome and feeling like I shouldn’t even feel that way. I just relate a lot to so much of what you said. I definitely feel your pain and I really hope you feel better soon. I know that what we only see a version of you but that version looks like there’s a wonderful person behind the image too and you do deserve to take care of yourself and feel better.

[@SarahNasser101]

THANK YOU SIMON! We trust you! We learning from you! Inspired by you! You're a heplful person. Thanks! 💙

[@krystalmcknight1834]

You are a true treasure of a person - self care and looking after one's wellbeing is the most important part of life. I wish you all the best to find a balance that works well for you. This video I imagine made you feel vulnerable, putting it all out there - but in the same way - it will likely prove so beneficial in the long run - the marathon that IS life. There's no shame in anything you have shared - and to be honest, what you have shared has made me feel a greater connection with you. Look after yourself, take great care and you will find giving yourself self care will be a wonderful thing. Love from this complete stranger - lol - Krystal

[@fnmolina]

Wow! THANK YOU Simon. I felt soooo reflected during the whole video. I'm in my second year of college and just a month ago I realized that my general mental health wasn't quite right. I used to think that anxiety and depression was an extreme state and so that wasn't my case. Thank you because it isn't easy to put feelings into words, and so have you done. I follow your channel since I was in the midst of highschool, when you had a little bit more than 5000 subscribers (or 15000, I don't remember exactly). You're such an inspiring person. You're welcome to Argentina any time you want. Best wishes Simon!!

[@edmondostrada3883]

Really brave to open yourself up like this. Thank you for sharing. I hope things take a better turn soon

[@EuskaltelEuskadi]

You are an amazing person Simon. You are caring, considerate, funny, talented and the most determined person I know. As a longtime anxiety and imposter syndrome sufferer myself (mostly brought on by a PhD in physics), I can only say I feel what you are going through. It does get better, a lot better than what you're feeling now. You'll still have bad days, weeks or months. But overall, you'll learn to manage it and understand what causes those feelings. We all subscribe and watch because we love you. Take all the time you need -- we'll be here for you when you're ready.

[@riccardocarroccio6759]

Take your time Simon! I do truly understand your feelings and wish you to get back talking to us about what you love being passionate and spreading your enthusiasm in everything you do. Everyone gets to some point in life when a crisis occurs, it is so important that you, having an audience online, spread this kind of message unveiling the rest of the "story". I hope for you to feel good soon again! And don't listen to who is ready to judge you, people that don't care about you don't deserve a crumb of your Time. See you soon - and even if won't be soon - a very big good luck for your life and for this difficult important moment!❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

[@samplectic]

We love you man, and want nothing but the best for you

[@beeheart6529]

I wish I knew why we are all so stubborn about asking for help. Let’s all try to notice when the people in our lives need help. ❤️

[@scootdub]

Thank you for your honesty.

[@peterscott6818]

Yes, yes, yes! Difficult subject. Brilliantly navigated. Ultimately nothing was solved. How could it be in a KZbin video? But the narrative you spun and the questions you posed point in a direction that is so important to draw attention to. Everyone has to work this sort of thing out for themselves but such authentic sharing of inner reality as this provides fine signposting. You did a good thing very well. I salute you.

[@eudaimona]

Thank you so much for sharing this. I'm rooting for you Simon

[@lmvdam]

Simon I think this video was very brave and important to both your audience and yourself. Thank you for your honesty and sharing this. I'm interested in what the letter to myself in 2019 ten years from now will look like and hopefully then you'll be as kind to yourself and perhaps even more skilled in taking care of yourself as you are now. All the best!

[@andrewcgs]

Dear, I could 100% relate with all of that. I really appreciate this video and how you decided to make it.

[@sherzadaritrizaman6949]

Simon ,ur really brave and courageous.People will always do mistake and face complicated situations.But,very few have the personality to confess about this thing s.I liked ur video s,but seeing this my respect increased for u.Salute to u.!!!.Ur not only a good physicist,u tuber but a very good human too.

[@paulking5199]

Really great advice. I got help during my PhD which really valuable. It can be very expensive but I guess it's worth it.

[@Huumbug]

i remember watching your oxford vlog when I was in high school in 2012*, to think you were possibly the first studytuber.... you've made a long wayy man

[@rushilkumar5258]

0:53 "4th wall, absolutely destroyed. "

[@diego87802]

Better than Deadpool

[@danfitz4]

Hey Simon, Thanks for talking about all the topics here. just started my PhD journey in a different field than my undergrad. You've a great character and always enjoy watching your progress.

[@jacobcarignan1]

You got me interested in research. Thank you so much for making these videos, it inspired me to do what I’m doing now and really strive for what I want to accomplish. Take as much time as you need, remember that it can often be a lot more time than you think you need. You do deserve it

[@faclede]

I'm very glad you talk about this we hope your recovery and all we want is to you be happy

[@nickymorris7393]

Wow Simon this hit hard for me! I wouldn't have guessed that you feel these things, you never can tell. I've been watching your videos through my undergrad now I've just started my PhD at Cambridge and I've been reaching a wall a wall of resistance, it's not there all the time but it shows itself in fatigue, disinterest and poor concentration. And I can never predict which days I'm going to feel this way! I don't feel like the person I used to be, and at a time when I need to be on my A game, it's just not happening!

[@bewm_4132]

You are very brave for making this video and I hope you get better. All of us are right behind you. Hopefully this will encourage others to do the same

[@hadirkhan7019]

I am so happy for you dr siman.I am starting my phd in Statistics

[@sinasoltani3262]

I enjoyed your honesty. And I learned. Thanks.

[@deolitobicuajr.5694]

I always reflect myself to you Dr. Simon.

[@CesarAngeles28]

Dear Simon, Thank you very much for this video! I understand when some times the means by which you can help people look like an oxymoron. But seriously thank you for this video. I really resonate my journey with you, so much! During my scientific career, I went so fast due to social and family pressure of being good that broke down at some point. Inevitable had some losses, academically ( Lost my PhD at the University of Southampton) but most importantly, my mental health. In your video, exactly explained my feelings; lack of confidence, purpose and reason of being. I have been following you for a while and Would like to thank you because of being brave to share your path and experience to us. You really helped my journey and even made me felt accompanied at times. I do agree, we need to talk more about mental health. No one deserves to feel like this and not have the possibility or knowledge of knowing why. Thank you., thank you very much and bless you Simon! Wish you all the best and you will always have my support! Take care of yourself during these times of uncertainty!

[@aggiew6359]

Take all the time all you need. I just want you to know that you inspired me to work harder at university and now I'm doing my masters in Mathematics which I love. Thanks for that. Love from Kenya!

[@ocean7371]

I have been watching you since 2013! Love your videos especially vlogs

[@Jejdjejbfjf]

I remember watching your vids from way back about how you study for exams, oxford admissions, etc. Always admired your dedication. Its probably been close to 10 years so I find this vid really interesting.

[@marshm3llow467]

Holy smokes, I'm so thankful that you made this video. I have been struggling with the exact same thing for years, although I'm only a 16 year old girl so probably the opposite demographic, lol. I worked myself so hard that I got really really sick, and I'm now disabled with bipolar disorder. (Don't worry, I use that word to empower myself!) I agree with all of the messages in this video, it was like hearing a more articulate version of myself speaking. (With my natural accent, that I lost when I moved to Canada.) Getting help was the hardest thing I've ever done as well, but it's also the best thing I've ever done. To anyone else who's struggling, all of what Simon is saying applies to you too, and I know you might not think it does, but it's true. Best of luck in your recovery Simon, and thank you for being such an inspiration as I'd love to study physics at Oxford as well!

[@stijnboeren3943]

Thank you for making this video Simon

[@imamulmalikchowdhury7659]

I've been watching your videos from 14 and now I am 20. Tell your younger self how much of an impact he made in my life. Will never forget you Simon Senpai!

[@mohammedsmith8166]

I'm a first year physics undergrad at a top UK uni, and I really needed this video. The self hatred, depression, anxiety, impostor syndrome. It's nice to hear that I'm not alone in feeling this way. I think I'm currently on a very similar path so I'm gonna get help, thanks so much for making this :)

[@faznaz7455]

I'm in a similar boat but in 2nd year. Uni life can be overwhelming to deal with sometimes. Always seek help if you are struggling. I pray for your good health and wellbeing.

[@yannick2047]

The seed of impostor syndrome is pretty much implanted with school starting at age 6 (in most cases …). Paradoxically, it only manifests in people that do actually care about developing themselves academically and professionally, which are in most cases the people that are good and doing well. It’s kind of absurd, but it happens.

[@darkone9206]

Simon I know how you felt/feel, I just started university this year and I've lacked the confidence to even visit the many societies available here but that's all I'll type about it I'm even afraid of making anonymous comments on KZbin , in ten years i'll probably look back in the same way you have been until then I likely won't have the courage to change. You have many people in the comments wishing you the best, you don't need me doing it too, it wouldn't make a difference anyway PS Even buying crack would be less damaging to your wallet then warhammer models

[@EdnaMuianga]

Life happens to all of us! I'm doing my PhD now, I can relate to some of this things. I've been studying abroad for 10 years now. Did a year of language (Chinese Language) got a Bachelors in Computer Science a masters in Management Science and Engineering (Information Systems field) continued doing the same for my PhD, this is my second year as PhD student and I kinda feel stuck. I am starting my KZbin Channel, felt like I needed a platform to express myself and do things I always wanted to do. TBH I try to pretend all is well, only show my good parts. And I sometimes forget my family is there for me, I've been away from them for so long. We should always reach out for help. Thank you for sharing this really means a lot. Hope it gets better. Take Care

[@sx5572]

I have been through your youtube channel for a long while ... hope you will be better soon. Take care.

[@bertguillemyn]

Thank you for this video! I just started uni this year and you have always been a great inspiration to me. Take whatever time you need, you deserve it.

[@alyk8254]

Hi Simon, I’ve been watching your videos for over three years now, and I will say that you were a big part of my journey. I remember the summer before my senior year of high school; I constantly watched your videos as I was trying to decide whether I wanted to study physics at Uni. I didn’t end up going into core physics(I’m in biophysics stream), but your resources were beneficial to me then and now! You helped me realize so much about my self from my love for physics to the fact that I want to become a researcher/scientist. Thank you so much for that, and I hope that everything will be good with you. Take as much time as you need; we’ll always be here. Sincerely, A fan

[@iRoelh]

Thank you Simon, we love you!

[@evieherriot3447]

As someone who was debating getting help for my mental health, thank you, Simon for encouraging me to know that it's okay not to be okay. I wish you all the very best, rest up and take care :-)

[@thadremaw]

Hi Simon, thank you for filming this video (and writing that brilliant blog post) - collectively, they’re the most relatable pieces on mental health I’ve ever come across. I’m seeking help for very similar struggles at the moment, a process that began about a decade ago for me. Best of luck as you seek further understanding and, hopefully, begin to heal. Also: yay Exeter! Did my BA and MA there, and as a former state school student myself I can also relate to how you struggled to fit in.