Side Effects of Mean Girls | Small Doses Podcast

This isn't a Tiny Fey movie review, but a look at the toxic culture of mean girl behavior from adolescence to adulthood.
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[@LotusLotus1979]

Y’all when she said they be at the women empowerment trip/ retreat …I hollered 😭 Yes someone mentioned hit the 👍🏾 button !!! Please we need Amanda to make this an ongoing series!

[@debonytunique]

The sad part is how many of us identified in that moment

[@itaylor120490]

I know your experience is with women being mean girls, but as a man. Men be “mean girls” too, especially gay men 😅. I feel like there’s a more specific term for “mean girls” that applies to all these manipulative MF’s. As I get older though, them be the people I ignore/threaten 😂😂 because they are the most busy body ass people I’ve ever encountered in my life 😤

[@TennisField]

Yup, you’re correct. My Mean Girls by blood are: My mother; my son 😢and his wife.

[@fah232]

Exactly, I think it's my age, depending on how I feel, I'll ignore or give it the way they give it, but never try to get along with them.

[@TheRetroWoman80]

Very, very enlightening. I'm in such a peaceful place these days without any friends (male or female). I just wish I was this aware in my teens and twenties as I was naively and desperately befriending others.Thanks for always dropping gems within your podcast, Amanda💚

[@acat6935]

I feel like you are speaking to meeeee! Definitely experienced, and still sorting through the residual affects of mean girl trauma. I had to remove myself because it had gotten so, so negative. I finally realized that just because you’ve been friends with people for “x” amount of years does not mean you need to continue to be loyal to them when they’re consistently behaving poorly. In my case I had to leave the whole circle which was scary, but I am so much more at peace now that I’m not a part of that toxicity. Honestly I can’t believe how long I put up with that bs.

[@traceysmith8937]

I felt this episode in my soul. Much needed to speak on

[@sophilozophy]

Loved everything about this episode. Truth from beginning to end. Forget about the mean girls/people and form your group of friends while not being mean. Hurt people hurt people, but there are also those who have been hurt and never want to be the reason for that pain to others. Choose which one you want to be, but remember you have to live with your choice and the former has karma coming your way one day all over it. Thank you, Amanda. Take care 👏🏽

[@RichmamaTy]

YOOOOOOOOOO IT’s ABOUT GOTDAM TIME THEY are insecure.

[@Zayday1993]

Doja cat F the girls is a perfect song for this LITERALLY!!

[@Amahdi44]

Great volume sis! Great topic. Much appreciated!

[@kayprism]

I wrote a solo play that I've adapted into a TV pilot that deals with this subject. I carried that pain around for years and finally forgave them in my late twenties but they won't ever be my Facebook friends.

[@fdfdfd1]

Highly intelligent, EXTREMELY intuitive

[@luckydavine]

“Ecosystem of their own inequalities to feel whole” DRAGGED. 💀💀

[@kikospice165]

Peace & balance ❤ I appreciate this topic... simular experiences. Growing up & now as a grown Black caramel skinned Woman still explaing to folks im not Biracial. Excluded as a child as a result solitude & independence became my strength.

[@kumosunfilteredconvospodca9615]

Mean Girls “throw rocks and hide their hands”

[@mwila1879]

This episode touched me, I felt seen. Thank you for this episode.

[@michaelrichardwarner]

MZ. Seales your fans in Omaha Nebraska would love Smart, Funny, and Black to announce that the show may come to town. Love everything you do Sis. ❤

[@talisa9618]

They exist at the gym too

[@itsEFY]

minute 11.... I am in fucking tears

[@tashachambers9154]

Good video - insightful. I have a guess as to the particular trip in question. 🙃

[@cpcc06]

Hey Amanda thank you for sharing your experiences. I truly believe this will help many. I’m listening to your story about the group chat. And to be fair I think where you went wrong initially was when you left the chat group first. That may have sent a negative message to them. There’s a way you can silence a group chat without them even knowing. I do it all the time with my family. 😂 But maybe by you living initially that concluded that you weren’t interested. Just offering a different perspective from what I’m hearing. Still love you!! ❤

[@TheAmandaSeales]

Nope. I left. I explained why. That is was personal to my own situation and that's it. Y'all keep doing a bunch of mental gymnastics to excuse the basic decency of communicating to a supposed friend that they are being removed from a space.

[@cpcc06]

@@TheAmandaSeales I’m on your team sis. I’m not trying to defend their behavior. But when I was listening to your story. I know you told us why you left the group. But I don’t remember hearing you say that you informed them as to why you left. That’s all I was saying. We love and support you. 🖤

[@keantrice7109]

I really want this outfit she has on 👀Does anyone know where it can be purchased?

[@Rocioslane]

Busy enough to not tell you, but not busy enough to remove you from the chat. FOH 😒

[@mikejones9556]

Are there mean boys? Mean men?

[@Steve_Minaj]

Miguel, you literally read my mind.I think the answer is yes.And I honestly believe it shows up in many different ways. For instance toxic masculinity or the desire to constantly draw comparisons to another.Lastly these individuals are very egotistical.

[@beachlover9705]

Yes snap snap those hos have charisma and seem like THAT girl until you get to know them better.

[@TjgAqua2786]

Unfortunately, gay men are the same😩😩 They take it to a whole new level x’s 1000. It’s nauseating. Amanda, wtf bro @45:23-45:27 😩😩😂😂😂😂

[@home-818]

If you weren't active in the chat, is it possible they didn't think you would care if you were removed since you didn't give notice when you left initially?

[@zolekahlabisa6483]

That's my question

[@TheAmandaSeales]

If that were the case then they could have said that. Instead they said they didn't say anything because they "didn't have time" and "didn't owe me that".

[@mockmywords]

Men too. Lol

[@biancachi6435]

We need this. This conversation was everything. I've often felt the odd one out. Thank God I'm old and mature enough to value what it taught me.

[@brittanyjohnson6752]

I think Amanda is labeled as mean cause she’s a smart a logical thinker and not easily persuaded into being taken advantage of. When someone has ill intentions it’s easier to label a coherent intellectual as combative, rude and mean. When that description is Farrrrrrr from actuality. Love this !

[@Rocioslane]

She also doesn’t fake the funk

[@heyauntielunden]

I love how professional you were in stating what happened without saying names. Those of us who have watched your entire journey can make our conjectures 😂 Appreciate how you illustrated how this archetype has evolved into womanhood and psychology breakdown. Brilliant ♋️!!!

[@T.Nickson]

I felt when Amanda said "I just dont like nobody." *Tears* Ppl tend to call ppl like Amanda mean cause they perceive her truth, as a threat/disruption to their comfort matrix. Not sure if the removal from the group chat was necessarily described as a clear example of mean tho, for these reasons: (1) Ghosting happens (2) Communication is at minimum a two-way street (3) We make time for the important things.

[@ItzD]

This group chat situation has me FLOORED! Why didn't they just create a new group chat? Why didn't they just put the trip invite in the group chat (knowing Amanda wouldn't see it)? Nah, that was super catty for no reason.

[@CreoleKing1986]

#CancerEnergy "Not a mean girl... I just don't like nobody." 🤣

[@mereew]

😂😂😂

[@teave1229]

I completely understand that statement

[@elaineshepherd2748]

Amanda is so intellectual and supportive of her people.❤

[@Steve_Minaj]

You are absolutely correct. Amanda is the best!!❤I bet she's a dope friend and confidant!!

[@the2ndcoming135]

Already know😌

[@arich91]

Do y’all realize that if this was the 60’s or 70’s Amanda would be in the history books. This woman would be a threat to the gov but a leader for us. Nowadays we are too distracted to see the value of others around us. We love you Amanda. We see you ❤

[@ERami-im4eo]

I was thinking this recently!

[@Brandirell]

Preach Amanda!!! These are literally the conversations that I’m having with my daughter right now. She’s only 8 but she is so full of love and light. She doesn’t understand why some people are mean and why some people will go out of their way to ostracize her. So trying my best to help her navigate her feelings around this. So thank you for this episode!

[@kjbatts9253]

I have watched and listened to this episode and whew. I was literally in tears because I have experienced this from “Christian” women in a “Christian” setting for years. I can be a little weird and awkward as well. This episode was the truth! The way the followers follow the mean girl(woman) is unbelievable. In my case this woman recruits women who have low self esteem and no self respect. Thank you Amanda this one I saved, bookmarked and I will definitely be listening again. 💯

[@corinthhunter2416]

Yuck. I was trying to give them the benefit of the doubt (cause Covid and all that was hard) until you said they took a vote. A VOTE?!? Without anyone even having a conversation with you-- gossipy and weird :/. And what's most gossipy and weird is that she TOLD you they took a vote. Lame. Next. Bye.

[@AviewbyShay]

This is such an amazing conversation. Girl the way I just screamed a vote (I was in my souljaboy voice) Meangirls are the original gaslighter. That sisterhood stuff be fake.

[@Artur-Itas]

MEOW!!!!!!!!

[@LotusLotus1979]

U may not ✌🏾“Mesh” ✌🏾with Amanda… But she be knowin

[@lisakirton8442]

Amanda - I promise in 10 years (most likely 5) you won’t even care. The switch that flips in your 40s is magical✨ Seamless even & it’s all with LOVE❤ #effthemhoes #poofbegone

[@TheAmandaSeales]

Im 41 and every woman in that chat was 40 and 50+.

[@stephaniebrooks8044]

I get wat ur saying, but being alone and being lonely are two different things! I luv my peace!😇❤

[@ratheenomad]

“The power of choice.” That resonated so loudly with me!

[@LucysprayLucyspark]

Omg the mean girl/bad boy analogy 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥

[@charlentahoward4265]

Called froggy when I was a kid. Now frogs all arnd hm. Now stands for Forever RELYING ON God . Just flipped it. Ribbit Ribbit ❤️😍

[@antoinettekminor]

To the women who have trauma from mean girls, please don’t give up on friendships with other women. It’s hard but I promise you there are still women who are girl’s girls who can give you genuine connection. ❤

[@jackjackson-ff2lu]

I'm a gay guy and there are mean gay "girls" too, like literally the same dynamic. I was involved in a "friend group " over the summer and omg my self esteem had never been lower. They (this specific group of gay guys) were so childish and mean. I remember one of them made fun of me for using the "🥳" emoji and it actually hurt my feelings!! Now that I'm not involved with them and have healed, I can't believe I let that hurt my feelings! Mean girls exist in the gay community and woof they are mean sometimes. Not trying to generalize but yeah,this specific group I was involved with over the summer was awful. Edit: anyone know if Amanda has an episode on being a "codependent"? I am 100% the codependent and attract narcissists like a magnet

[@kwanzafalaka5668]

I have a friend who is awesome, but she is a part of a particular sorority. She always invite me to her events, birthday parties, brunch, holiday parties etc. She is cool but when I tell you that her sorority sisters are on some mean girl ish for sure. I laugh in their faces now, but at first I was like wtf! These women are well into their fifties smh! I still hang out with my friend but I am more selective and I pay her friends dust these days.

[@karlettakelly1807]

Omg Amanda you just defined my old boss for me!! Thx Cancer Sis!

[@TennisField]

I’m so proud of the work Amanda’s doing. This video is helping me so much.

[@_HeARTSconnection]

Thanks so much for this Amanda! ❤️ As a codependent creative person who has dealt/dealing with mean girl situations, this really spoke to my soul and made me feel seen.

[@resilientred1699]

I, fortunately, am blessed with GREAT friends/sisters, but the Mean Girl thing is REAL. It’s healthy for all of us to check ourselves and our sisters to make sure we’re not contributing to the Mean Girl behavior/attitudes.

[@charles5272]

Thank you so much for your Great gift ❤

[@OfficialJalenHemphill]

24:02 YES!!! I Dealt With The "Mean Girl" Too. The Ringleader Always Gotta Problem With Something I Said Or Did & The Minions Followed Behind Them. When The Mean Girl Decides That She's On Good Terms With You, Then The Minions Are On Good Terms With You Too. Monkey See, Monkey Do Bullshit. Thank You Amanda! LOL!!!

[@LaKae444]

“Sometimes the inner child needs to STFU!” 🤣🤣 Nah that’s real. 👏🏾

[@the2ndcoming135]

💀

[@TheRetroWoman80]

True

[@LouiseAngelWings]

Someone told me this and I adapted into my narrative when feeling some kinda way: "Is it a me thing, or is it a thing thing?" Reflective reflex to keep me grounded and perspective 🌈💛✨

[@Steve_Minaj]

I'm convinced. I desperately need to take a class under Amanda Seales. Amanda Seales is extremely talented,full of wisdom and an awesome personality. If only my college professors were like-mindedAmanda has become my best friend in my head.I often find myself asking.What would Amand do? I simply adore and admire this strong ,intellectual,charismatic woman.

[@melisaco79]

Those mean girl experiences are exactly why I refuse to have female friends. My closest friends are non-misogynist men who I can always count on, trust and they’ve always kept it 💯with me. I’m the type that will end up in prison if I deal with a mean girl. I’ll light up the spot real quick.💥 In 40 years, 44 on this Earth and I have never dealt with problems from my male friends like I’ve dealt with around females.

[@ememmichaeludo2044]

I love everything about this episode so relatable ❤️❤️❤️❤️🖤🖤🖤. I've had situations like Amanda's when my group of friends were planning a trip right there in my presence. They didn't include me in the conversion all the while I was seating there. Eventually they left for the trip but never even asked me to come along. This happened in the University. I felt bad but really started to keep my distance after that.

[@kimdean9085]

Love what you do!

[@CrysRenee319]

I appreciate this episode so much. I often say I have no friends but the reality is, in burnt out on trying to become friends and then being disappointed when I find out they're on some fuck shit. Like, I wasted all that time to be disappointed. Becoming friends as an adult feels impossible.

[@LayJS463]

This was so good!!!! Much appreciated ❤️

[@Rocioslane]

Whew! I’ve heard this podcast before, but listening back really unearthed some crazy memories.

[@PriscillaCScott]

“If you have not preserved my feelings, your feelings are out…THE WIIIIIINDOOOOW”😂 Sing it louder!

[@ArleneKelton]

Love your realness Amanda . Keep soaring young lady.😊

[@eugeniaperry4278]

I survived the mean girls, I survived. And I have always been smart and beautiful 😉🥰⭐️🙏🏾

[@apriljoe444]

IDK, I like most of Amanda's content but, I have noticed that she has called ppl names (i.e. stupid, etc.) for not agreeing with her. I think that most of her guest have to walk on egg shells. I never see anyone express a difference of opinion or perspective that doesnt match hers. She just might be a mean girl

[@mirical4871]

Great job

[@karencanan2701]

Theres even Mean Boys! When can high school.be left behind. Its a drag to drag it along with us.

[@DanielleWilliams-m8s]

Sometimes I think the mean girl is the side kick to the popular girl…. They always play second so they learn to become the mean girl

[@DanielleWilliams-m8s]

Sometimes I think the mean girl is the side kick to the popular girl…. They always play second so they learn to become the mean girl

[@TheFilmLocker]

I just saw an interview with Sunny Hostin on Sherri Shepherd show. I feel that was the group chat she was talking about. 😅

[@taykendall910]

Amandaaaaaaa!!!! You were PREACHING in this one, as u always do tho!! 👏🏾👏🏾 Unfortunately, I have and am currently still experiencing this with my younger sister... 😫 .. She is currently blocked (on phone and socials) and the catalyst was her wedding last year.... I say all that to say, you have just confirmed for me (again) that I am NOT CRAZY! These people be peopling! And these mean girls really be needing "followers" and this shit just sucks bcuz some of her followers just so happen to be my other siblings, cousins, and aunts!! My feelings were hurt last year, but I have analyzed and accepted the new way these relationships just have to look in the future... I have only had ONE best friend my whole life. And we grew apart a LOOOOOOOONNNGGG time ago, but I finally removed myself completely like 5 yrs ago now. People don't understand how "dangerous" a person who can truly stand alone can be!! Bcuz NOTHING they do intimidate, effect, or have ANY room in my brain and that FUCKS with them so much!! 🤭🤭🤭 (Other family members who I do talk to and trust confirm this for me on a REGULAR!!) Thank you as always for sharing your thoughts!!! I really appreciate you!! ❤ Sending Love,Wellness, Light, and Positive energy to you and your Love! 🤗🥰🙌🏾

[@stephaniebrooks8044]

Absolutely don't let them suck ur energy!

[@niisharegin_]

Omg I’m dealing with this right now at the office. I keep to myself and sometimes I chop it up with those I vibe with naturally. But there is this one almost 40 year old women who thinks I’m acting bitchy because I choose to not chop it up with her. I’m cordial and kind. That should be enough but for whatever reason she is dedicated to try to connect with me and it will NEVER happen. She’s nasty and a mean girl herself & that is the reason she isn’t my cup of tea. You do you and I do me. What’s so wrong about that?😩 Ass kissing isn’t going to get her far. It’s just going to get her more and more ignored. Lol

[@psychodellicFaubio]

Ppl who I can’t relate too which is most lmaoo , like why would I gaf??

[@msdkny21]

I needed this conversation today. Perfect timing.

[@Mzfashionista83]

And if don’t know, Now you know!!!! This was an awesome topic and video!!!! Amanda you just keep dropping those Gems!!!!!!❤

[@DaniDVinelife]

This was very eye opening and reflective! Great topic!

[@the2ndcoming135]

🤣

[@keantrice7109]

Was the vote done in the chat while you were still in it? Im confused...

[@ladylady8745]

Amanda. This is a wonderful postcard topic. So many people Can relate to dealing with mean girls. I really enjoyed listening to this while I was driving to work. U are wonderful and I wish all positive things to come Your way.

[@TheAmandaSeales]

So glad you enjoyed it! What's a "post card" topic? I've never heard that phrase

[@ladylady8745]

@@TheAmandaSeales hahah. I meant to say a podcast topic. I was in a hurry when I wrote it.

[@Hfgv281]

The back in the chat jingle was hilarious.

[@projectliberate621]

Great topic!❤. Amanda is the _ _ite

[@1982mjohn]

Loved this! Amanda is on point ✊🏾

[@didierarteis]

Over 500 viewers why doesnt the likes match 🤔

[@didierarteis]

Janalle Monae Oct 18th youtube theater. 😊

[@nakuro2686]

10:41 so on point; me myself and i

[@ambee3943]

When you coming to PHILLY AMANDA????? ❤✊🏾😊SMART FUNNY & BLAACK!! 💪🏾🫶🏾💗

[@the2ndcoming135]

She is hilarious🧐

[@didierarteis]

Claudia Jordan🤔🤔🤔🤔 mean gal or naw?

[@Artur-Itas]

WONDER WHOMAN IS A MOVIE!!!!!!!

[@debonytunique]

This is a sermon, my goodness!

[@OhThatsAngie]

Awesome video

[@ablacksquare]

This was an interesting topic that I hadn’t considered.

[@the2ndcoming135]

I know huh?😎

[@chikFromMTL]

Thank you for your immaculate intellectual breakdown of the Mean Girl phenomenon 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾 This is what I didn't know I needed 🙌🏾

[@ROA1988]

Good Topic. Good Episode. My "mean girls" have been work-place bullies.

[@DoMeDoMyNDoI3490]

Preach sis, preach

[@AviewbyShay]

Yup

[@ambergibson7381]

OMG!! Real talk Ms. Amanda❤️ #FACTZ💯 & HANDS👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽

[@MakedaNew]

This really hit home. Thanks so much for your openness and providing real life solutions for effectively managing these incidents. Truly appreciate your fun delivery, aesthetic, and engagement ❤

[@hiebyee5695]

I absolutely adore you Amanda so I want to hold you accountable for something you mentioned about the group chat. You didnt communicate to the group when/why you initially left the chat but you expected communication for being removed. Respect goes both ways.