Stay Positive While Grieving??

Staying positive is a BIG ask while grieving. Usually it means substituting fake positive thoughts for negative thoughts. BUT.... I offer up reasons why both negative and positive thoughts need to play a role in our Grief. Have a watch and let me know your thoughts!!
Let's Do Grief Differently!! You and your Grief deserve support. 🙏🏻
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[@grieftherapist]

Grief and positivity are a wild word combination....BUT I have found value in in some efforts to invite in positives while feeling deep Grief. Have a watch and share your thoughts, aha moments, and challenges! 🙏🏻❤

[@terrydaniels9126]

Thanks jo for your insight an life experience hangen in there Terry

[@Toinette2883]

I was always such a pessimist and when I met my husband I was amazed at how positive and happy he always was. I decided I was going to focus on being grateful and finding all the blessings around me. The day I learned to do this my quality of life changed. I was amazed at how blessed I was and living with a grateful heart made me so much happier. Now that I have lost my husband it has been so hard to do this but when I can focus on the blessings in my life it really does help. I know many will say how can you be blessed when you just lost the love of your life? It is hard but it can be as simple as being grateful that the sun was out today or the beautiful flowers whatever the case may be. When you start looking for the blessings you will be amazed at what you find!

[@speak2theresafox]

2 years 61 days. That self compassion thing is hard to come by. Thank you for reminding me that I am only human.

[@sharonlujan9497]

I am grieving 5 or six people right now I feel guilty when I get bursts of happiness which happen rarely. I turned completely to god as my source to deal with my losses

[@thyrarutter2341]

I lost my husband 6 weeks ago. I am getting a lot of out of these videos. Thank you so much.

[@teresastickelmeyer4864]

Keep looking and take words that help and put other away. Keep looking 🎠🎠🎠🐦

[@VictoriasRoses]

It has been six months for me. At first I tried to be positive to get through the day. Then I realized I was just tricking myself. I let myself grieve. I am still grieving. I really look up to my Grandmother who was born in 1910. She lost two husbands and her mother at a young age. I look at her strength to keep going. She was not positive all of the time but she kept going every day. She said I am going to try to enjoy every day because life is too short. I have to agree with her. For me, it really is to keep going even if I am negative. I try to do something when I am negative to positively honor the person I lost because my love still goes on.

[@mattparr3038]

That's a healthy perspective regarding grief I think.. i allow myself to feel it all, whenever it arises.. while keeping positive and looking ahead, I dont ignore negative feelings, sadness, occasional anger maybe. All healthy stuff aye all apart of the individual grief process. All the best to you.

[@Lindawhitelaw-rm5bq]

Jo thank you very much for this wonderful guidance that you share with people who are greeting

[@msklvr5078]

I am so grateful to have found your videos. I am newly widowed - 2 months today. You make a lot of sense and have provided to me a light to follow on this long unfamiliar and dark path. Thank you.

[@sherrijones9234]

It is difficult to remain positive while grieving, and this helps so much

[@Breese2382]

I am trying to remember to be grateful for the love he brought to my life❤

[@petradixon1899]

I lost my 17 year old son to brain cancer last year. Your videos help me so much. I have never been so devastated In my life.

[@BUBBLESPOGO]

I'm so sorry 😢😢

[@QueenYak]

I am so very sorry for your loss. I can't begin to imagine...

[@greenhomestead6305]

I’m so sorry for your loss. May God give you peace.

[@bambicox3275]

My heart goes out to you as I lost my 27 year old son last year.

[@Grace-cj5qw]

​@@bambicox3275 I'm so sorry for your loss ❤🙏.

[@Sishbadack]

As I approach one yr this week , I am so sad and anxious. 1 yr of not hearing his voice , his laughter and just so missing him. But through these videos I have felt so supportive. I am able to laugh at some memories and share them with my small support group. I still feel hurt that those who are physically around me ,can’t validate my loss nor acknowledge I am grieving. Even in that hurt , I am so grateful to my small support group . I have grown in understanding ppl are very uncomfortable with grief . I don’t like that they are but I will push paste their uncomfortableness and do what I need to do for me . I thank Jo McRogers for these videos, and have recommended to friends who are doing their grief journey.

[@grieftherapist]

🙏🏻 Thank you for this Eileen

[@joanburga3873]

I am filling a small scrapbook with precious memories. I want to preserve these memories, to allow me to remind myself of beautiful or humorous times. The pages have illustrations and pictures. My husband was a musician who loved to have me accompany him, and believe me, there were some awkward and funny situations. I find the act of creating my book of memories helps ease the pain of loss.

[@shannonwilson65]

Thank you- your videos are helping me so much. My dad’s been gone two months today. Those dates suck. I lost my mom 17 months ago Care Giver for my dad 24 seven last 3 years- I watched them both take their last breath & caregiver to final moments. I haven’t had time to grieve for my mom because my dad’s caretaking became overwhelming and now they’re both gone. It seems grief is overwhelming and I’m taking one step one little step each day Your videos are helping me so much thank you. This one did help.❤

[@aprilerains4578]

i cant remember our memories, i try, i cant recall, why is this we were married 36 yrs did everything togeth, best friends, lovers, partners everything to eachother.

[@lindahobbs2136]

Another helpful video for those of us on the long journey of supporting a loved one with a chronic (and in my case, degenerative) illness. When people ask about my hubs with Parkinson's, I've begun to say we know it's not a condition from which he'll become "better". That we take it day by day. But sometimes, I don't know how to do that. This gave me some tools and a perspective. Thank you.

[@inkyfingers3447]

I’m “positively” grieving! Just feeling numb but not negative.

[@dredwardchisnall1017]

Your wonderful insights always seem to come at the right time for me. In the loss of my wife your coping mechanisms need me to learn how to adapt to them but help wonderfully. You are such a kind and genuinely caring person that you inspire me to try to create that balance between positivity and negative bias which has poisoned my most difficult times. Thank you for sharing your gentle wisdom with a grieving man who cared for his lady wife in her dementia and decline at home. Thank you so much. Your words and advice are the only ones that have truly helped me at this time and I feel you open your souls to my grief and unhappiness and shine. Light on things. ❤ Thanks, kind lady.

[@lauriemtz8616]

Yes I feel judged and go into negativity often. I feel very sensitive and can barely eat. I’ve never had to force feed in my life. I wish I could call my mom and stop having panic attacks.

[@greenhomestead6305]

I’m sorry for your loss,. I hope it gets easier for us all.

[@sharonlujan9497]

Yes some days are darker than others

[@user-kk6pg6mq7p]

Yes your video makes sense

[@sherrijones9234]

The negative thoughts can be overwhelming, working to flip the script is at times hard

[@bransonbeattie3441]

Lots my 14 year old son 2 years ago. I have a good life other than that. But, 💯 I only have negative thoughts. Absolutely no positivity. Not once.

[@noremac4807]

Really appreciate the point about cultivating positivity while still having natural negativity bias

[@starstuff5958]

I have NO tolerance for anyone elses issues. I feel like I am trapped inside my own shell of sorrow and I simply don't care what is going on with others. SO not me and that guilt makes it all even worse. sigh

[@marija2387]

Thank you. You nailed the challenges and offered workable options.

[@lindabrunsch1303]

7 weeks since my daughters death. Im supposed to be over it according to some,plus my husband has just been diagnosed with Huntingtons disease so Im grieving a few things.

[@klanderkal]

Hi Jo, my Grief is not from loss of love one,.... but loss of my career job. I retired from my best job ever. I planned on continuing this job forever. But, a temporary extremely stressful event happened to me, and while in distress with insomnia... i retired. I realized what i had done.... and slipped into dark depression. I haven't been the same since. I nolonger do anything anymore. I've lost interest in all my sports, hobbies and interests. Worst of all, ive lost interest in living., I've been beating myself up everyday. My mind hasn't accepted this. Im unable to let this go. Im unable to stop thinking of the loss. All i keep saying is " I want my job back ". My depression is horrible, and im still in disbelief. I've grieved before in my life with loss of wife, and other loved ones.... Why is this grief so extreme? Loss of structure? self image? Identity? purpose?.... 🙏

[@sylviacolon1640]

The problems I'm going through are many. I've been told within a few days ago after the second loss ( this person didn't meet my brother-my first loss) that "I wasn't acting right" a few times in different ways and that "I need to be like to be like her" and that "I sit on the couch all day and don't do anything " and I was expected to dance to the music (that my fiancée listened to). All of these very hurtful words escalated my severe grief. I have even felt like killing myself and like I was going to die. This person had gone through grieving but I guess her grieving wasn't long and handled it different. But I cant. And every day I feel like I can't make it because of my 2 losses and because of several other reasons also. I'm positive to determine to keep trying to go on but I feel like I can't. I need someone to talk to.

[@elizeminnaar8187]

Thank you so so much for this video as I thought it was so weird that negative thoughts bombarded my mind after my husband died 2 months ago. I started feeling guilty. Thank you for giving me guidance. I tried to focus on more positve memories but would find me in the negative garden again. I'll try to move to the positive while gently let go of the negative. Thanks again for your help.❤

[@Kay-pb8tm]

It comes from what other people / family expect. Where did this saying "it is what it is" come from? I know there's nothing i could have done to save my Husband from his lymphoma, but we both gave it a good go for 8 and half years. We were positive but i don't want to hear now "it is what it is".. this just gets me angry.

[@jenniferharrison7305]

Thankyou for your video's. It has been a year since my husband died, they have helped me grieve. I spent many years looking after him. I miss him.

[@debbiedrummond9761]

First of all I am very thankful for your most helpful videos. My nature seems to be staying on the positive side but that does not mean that I often find myself in deep grief. It comes and goes. I have wonderful loving and often thoughtful memories of my husband and that is what often holds me together. I try to honor him each day even if it is in the midst of my grieve.

[@lisao3753]

Thank you so much for this most supportive self help topic. Your presentation was easy to understand, put in order and you were so gentle in explaining.

[@grieftherapist]

Glad it was helpful Lisa.🙏🏻

[@tracynewton3083]

The scrap book is a fantastic ia to remanis, thank you 🙏

[@jennifershort3104]

If I am triggered while I'm out I can lose patience and my mood easily becomes negative. I am grumbly and I have to leave as soon as possible. Self-compassion is a big challenge when I tend to be hardest on myself. I know there are scrapbooks and photo albums we have given over the years that can be completed. Also, I work on gratitude in prayer and/or journaling. I am seeking help as I need it. That's a real challenge for me.

[@monicaesparza5204]

Thank you very much for this... I helped me understand why I didn't trust people anymore, why the sudden bursts of anger. Thank you Again.

[@judygarnet425]

Thank You for your Wonderful videos ! Your Soo helpful in helping me with a sudden death of a spouse! For me I my life I experienced grief many times with close people passing, but this last time was totally unexpected and he was also a soulmate! The best man that was ever in my life besides my Dad!

[@brownettataylor1053]

I like the idea of grief walk or grief yoga

[@paulinecraig1327]

1 year since I lost my husband I too can remember negative things I do try to b positive it's hard but I'm trying each day thk u for your kind words x

[@teresastickelmeyer4864]

Until you have a loss of a child nobody can understand. I have lost all of my support system through death. Now my son. My great grandson 2 months after. It's so much that I can't believe it real. I don't even tell people what has happened.🎉

[@terrydaniels9126]

Think positive as much can have. To

[@sarahreid9206]

I have felt judge and I've found it hard to rember those members and I can always feel like this 😂😂😂😂 and this is my hart 💔💔💔

[@aprilpritchard7186]

Upset down in room 😢

[@sherrijones9234]

I love your videos

[@noremac4807]

Would love to know more practical advice on how to do self compassion

[@aprilpritchard7186]

Passed away dad

[@junecarney8621]

I trying to stay positive but it's very hard ,in my grief

[@MADELENEC1]

I am not kind to myself...I blame myself for his death....I am in my own nightmare

[@sharonlujan9497]

No body understands an the devil has really been attacking me It’s hard an scary to do my normal tasks

[@sharonlujan9497]

My happiness is gone so I fake it

[@ocrodger]

Hello, I'm wondering if the grieving/ loss applies to grieving the loss of your body after being diagnosed with Parkinson's disease. I understand we all go through grieving process. I was diagnosed 3 years ago with Parkinson's disease and continue to grieve every day over the loss of my body's ability to do the things I used to do. Is it true that grieving the loss of someone you care for is so deeply is similar to grieving the loss of your body with when diagnosed with a chronic disease? And if so, do I need to seek counseling for lots of body function/ ability to move and walk and think like I used to before Parkinson's. Also just a quick question. My mom died one month ago and I'm dealing with that loss. So do I have a double griefing that I needed to take care of? I appreciate your advice. Thank you

[@noremac4807]

Why is grieving only framed in the context of a death?

[@kathleensmith644]

I agree, but I suppose death seems like an ending that can not be put right. However there are many losses that can cause grief.

[@noremac4807]

@@kathleensmith644 thanks, that is true, but there are significant losses like a career, reputation, home that cannot be put right. For no fault of my own, I lost all three simultaneously, and the betrayal, devastation and trauma and grief has not left me, even after 2 years. I will never get them back