Storytime | I had a bad Au Pair experience

[@lenapenrhyn2173]

Oh my god, that is terrible!! I'm currently an au pair and while my experience isn't like yours, I am not happy with how I've been treated (they act nice, can be reasonable in some cases, but overwork me). It is so daunting as a young person to put your trust in strangers to provide a home for you, especially when it's your first time away from home. It's crazy to me that like... having an au pair is MEANT to be about an exchange of culture, and opening your home to someone who's different from your family. But this host mother crossed a line by having you go that strange woman who absolutely violated you with all that talk about "family violence" - what on earth?? - and also the fact that the mother questioned your allergies??? And wouldn't let you have the drink you wanted when you were SICK? and didn't even FEED you when you were sick? that to me is insane, thank goodness you got out. and the kids seem a bit wild, that's so difficult... oh god, I'm so sorry. What you said at the beginning about not knowing what'a weird and what's not in a family because you've only ever been in your own... I don't think I've ever questioned and doubted my instincts so much in my life since starting to be in the current au pair job I'm in (it's only three months and I go home in a few weeks). The truth is, my instincts have been right from the beginning - that the family is exploiting me. But when I challenged my work hours I was made to feel like I was being irresponsible, a burden, that I was wrong, that I was ungrateful... it really got to me. I was manipulated so much that I think it will hurt for a while. It's one thing to be criticised by a boss, but when that boss is kind of a temporary maternal figure and you live in her home... it feels like such a betrayal to be criticised and manipulated and exploited. I can't wait to go home!

[@nelliemilne1724]

Sorry you were exposed to those crackpots. It would be really difficult as a young person venturing out into the world to begin with, let alone coming across people with a world view that tried to make your grandmother out to be a bad person. We're currently thinking about getting an au pair but I'm like what if I come across as weird to a forign person? Hopefully if I'm asking myself that question it means I have enough insight to make sure I don't project any of my issues onto a young person in that situation! Living with people outside of the usual family dynamic is tough.

[@Nina94771]

You really get a sense of how crazy some people are when you live in their house and they view you as “less than”. The insight is amazing, feel like more ex nanny’s and au pairs should write books!

[@victoriavala127]

every time I see a bad experience video from au pairs its ALWAYS the French. idk if its just because many people go to France as au pairs but this is insane

[@sebaofficial04]

I would have done something bad to her. But I'm glad you're okay. You are Strong. Thank you for sharing your story.

[@tiisetsonyikolebese]

Moghel😭

[@LordMarvin1993]

Oh my favourite moment was the kid having a sick day for being 15 minutes late for bed because I wouldnt let him drive home with guys who had been drinking...kind of wonder why his older kids never even called

[@doggogoa]

Thank you for sharing. Sorry about what you have been through, glad that you find a new family to stay. Hope things go well for you in the future.

[@lauraswihart4816]

Sounds like she was crazy! 😖

[@neusiacossa]

That was so mean of her. But thanks for sharing

[@murtazahmed5770]

Well Explained ❤️ Did you pay any fee charges? Let me know!

[@fannyelizabeth]

Hi there! No I didn’t

[@karenkiebooms1373]

the difference between freedom and getting more and more autonomy ... hou de kat van de melk weg ... we have become our worst enemy and I understand it up to a cerain level, but warn the people of the fact that we tend to promise golden treasures and act the opposite way ... I try to be as authentic as I can and can explain why I don't live my best life without falling into that complainig policy - I TOOK responsibility and did my homework, but people kept on testing me until I had to give up and only save what I really treasured. The internet is our outside brain and it already changed the world, so autonomy has to become stronger than freedom. Maybe it's best to use the idea of block chains for these kinds of enterprises because we often have the problem of wrong expectations and (to my idea) it is not fair to blaim the one and protect the other, there are always two sides on the coin. Maybe, I can't change a lot for the moment, but I can make people aware of their own capability to solve their problems and keeping an open communication is one of the pit falls that usually ends in the worst-case scenario. Mind your Ps and Qs is an expression that fits in perfectly - we can't always say what we want and can't know the social structure when we are not part of that structure, that's why I use concentric circles to see if something is my problem or not. We can't change things on a big level, when we even can't change it on a small one and that's why we (ET.amine team) have created the *WECK pot* (Welness, Education, Creativity and 'Kunst' art) ... it's not hardcore, but doing the same with more autonomy and reward only what is really worth the effort, working as a team, not as an employee. KZbin is a platform with potential and I needed the comment box to share my ideas, so don't make it your weapon to scare me off and let me do my thing the best I can.

[@natalyaa4928]

Whew. I was watching this as a prospective host family mother, to learn what makes a bad experience for au pair, and what I have learned is - I probably won’t hire an au pair that never had kids. because ‘what should I do when kids don’t listen?’ is the most complex question of parenthood. This Au pair will feel like another child to me .

[@nelliemilne1724]

Yeah we are considering an au pair as my husband works away and we have no family where we live. I would worry that I would start and unintentionally mother a young person coming into my home. Especially as we are "older" first time parents and a teenager or 20 year old would almost feel like a child to me. So much to consider. Not acceptable that the mother took her to that kinisiologist who projected family violence onto her. Terrible

[@beekau5009]

Thanks for sharing babe. I don't want what I'm saying to sound weird but I'm just letting you know because you may not know. I care about you and it's just a word of caution. Please be extremely careful not to go to energy healers and all that stuff. 9/10 they're dealing with unclean spirits themselves and are more tuned into the dark or deceptive spirits. I'm not sure if you have a specific faith and I would wanna tell you what to do but just stick with a God and Jesus. The reason you got duck to my belief is because there was a transference of unclean spirits that the lady passed through that consultation.

[@fannyelizabeth]

❤️❤️

[@LovePatience32]

God bless u

[@nabinakhadka5292]

Haaha

[@tiisetsonyikolebese]

8:23 🤡