StutJo Tattling to Tookie's Mom?! Oh, and the FBI (w/ Anthony Zenhauser)

[@mahtinown-eel]

John forgets that he’s a 5’6” 60 year old, out of shape drunk

[@richford6454]

With no self awareness

[@harryditka460]

Hello FBI… I’d like to report an insult.

[@countof3everybodyOD]

DEY TRASHED MY KIDS

[@BrianDalpe]

Imagine how disappointed his mom is in her son.

[@0m3g4wolf8]

I picture Suzanna hearing another mid 50’s woman complaining about their ex-husband, and just smiling…

[@adamrasmussen9939]

Seeing John's poor beleagured mother bringing him food and stuff reminds me of an over the hill Cartman screaming for his goddamned cheesy poofs at his nearly 90 year old mum.. .

[@Kasigi03]

His "weeeooooooowwww" doesn't do him any favors in not looking or sounding like Cartman as well.

[@Patriots-Inc.1776]

🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@louiecmancuzo2903]

He's spiraling. Love it.

[@TsunamiWebster]

He's making alot of money 💰 cause of these guts exposure, got me watching

[@barzy9725]

He is spiraling. I wonder what he will do in the end. Post office

[@frankiesaenz7265]

15 minute mark john was bragging what a great conversation he had with suzanner, then moves his hair back with his hand. If only john knew how he gives himself away with his nonverbal cues when he's lying.

[@vinnieheadache]

No one thinks you are going to do anything, King of All Deadbeats.

[@insertnamehere5809]

The Hero of the Stupid!

[@simongreen9372]

I love meltons comment on John. Its spot on "Whats amazing is that John doesn't even know what he is, and he doesnt know how he got there". Faddy Paddy Think about that.

[@Siouxperman]

Good one Melton, but I agree. lol

[@UnknownWarriorZz]

Holy shit. He’s seriously more delusional and unhinged than I thought.

[@jasonnadeau6556]

We need an interview with Sharon stone’s bodyguard . And a day of appreciation as well. Lucky bastard.

[@WrightOnTarget]

"I'm smarter than everyone in this dabbleverse, none of you have the academic achievements I've reached" Yeah, there are certainly no doctors in the dabbleverse that are universally adored. Love that he brings up the substitute teacher qualification, he really never grew up from the "the teacher is the smartest person" thing toddlers believe.

[@hey_its_travis]

He doesn't understand what the FBI actually does. It's amazing how stupid he actually is.

[@shawn_530]

He thinks he can just go there like it’s the post office and file some paperwork to have all these people thrown in jail

[@WahrheitMachtFrei.]

He's lucky his mother is also his carer, he could never have made it to 60yo without intense supervision.

[@XRingcutter]

He has no idea, the FBI is way too busy destroying evidence and covering up what they have done to deal with him.

[@Yokes27]

Edit: Delete FBI and insert the word ANYTHING.

[@deadjuice1880]

I thought it was just a diss, but he literally has the mind of a child.

[@WahrheitMachtFrei.]

🎶🎶🎶Breakin' the larwr, breakin' the larwr! 🎵🎵🎵

[@RicArmstrong]

😅

[@Justen1980]

Dabblin afta midnight! Doxxin till da dawn! Drinkin in tha mornin! Its skol! ITS SKOL!!

[@WahrheitMachtFrei.]

43:00 They say in the military everyone gets promoted to one level beyond their competence. That's been SJ's role in life.

[@mattlohr]

Let's be fair: With John, the fact that any of us even know who he is means it's far beyond one level.

[@howardmctroy3303]

I think that's called "The Peter Principle." The cream rises until it sours.

[@RM-th8ol]

John has fuckn lost it.

[@howardsternssmicrophone9332]

He's just one liver transplant away from being a Horrorcow.

[@goochI034]

He lost it a loooong time ago.

[@Kasigi03]

What? Something he never had.

[@guycollins8137]

Suzanner if im ever in you're town doing comedy, beers on me

[@evansgate]

It's honestly impressive to me that John has like 15 mortal enemies at this point. And he wakes up and is angry at all of them

[@markp8581]

You guys need to hire an old lady to barge into each show with a pile of laundry LOL

[@williams.1130]

John fails to mention, yes he was the first stuttering announcer, he was also the last. Because everyone was like omg this is awful demote him and never do this again

[@DKCG0113]

I have been out of the dabbleverse for 2 months. I poke my head back in for a day, and it's the exact same thing.

[@tdowell8615]

Did everyone forget John is a liar?

[@dirkdiggler8794]

Obviously John got black drunk n doesn't remember what he said during those phone calls with Kate...

[@The495marauder]

That intro promo was awesome. Thank you to who ever produced that.

[@psfanboy79]

He’s seething, it’s all consuming, a million dollars couldn’t calm his nerves.

[@HankBukowski]

"Das da kina guy yiyam!" If John was that kind of guy from the start...he might still have a family.

[@TonyMichaels166]

“Oi don’t loi… oi don’t *loik* tuh loi… unless oi *have-tuh* loi… or dey *make* me loi…”

[@HankBukowski]

@@TonyMichaels166 Well done, nuggies no sauce. "loi" I'm incorporating that into my dabble diction.

[@UnknownWarriorZz]

The only thing that qualified John to ask celebrities insulting questions when he was in stern was because of how delusional he is. It served him well for an extremely short period of time…now it’s beyond sad.

[@4runit654]

Johns hair is a different color everytime i see him

[@WahrheitMachtFrei.]

He's a 60yo man who never learnt to blow his nose. He is the poster child for failed parenting. Aase has to suffer the consequences of her failure everyday.

[@1105kross]

She’s absolutely getting payback for her horrible parenting and what she raised this mutant to be.

[@Chicken_Little_Syndrome]

He knows how to 'blow' his nose. That's why he is always sniffing. He mails empty envelopes of blow to himself.

[@T.McGarry]

He learned how to blow KB instead....

[@Kasigi03]

He knows how to blow his nose on everything but a tissue.

[@Yokes27]

He always reminds me of the Mr Plow episode of the Simpsons. "Suttering john is a loser and i think that hes a boozer..."

[@borrisg4972]

Now that you mention it, he's reminding me of Barney in the Homer and NASA episode. "badada buboombuboom CHARGE!" takes off, expertly piloting his jetpack while chugging a bottle of non-alcohol champagne, determination in his eyes... til it all peters out a few seconds later ending in hilarious disaster.

[@shellbacksclub]

"if u never n-n-need me Suzanner, I'll b-b-b-be THERE!... I'll be loaded & I'll need a ride, b-b-but I'll be there!"

[@emmestein]

Just want to state that the left doesn’t claim SJ. Not that democrats are leftists, but the point still stands. He’s only saying stuff to paint himself as a martyr, which he isn’t. Like many have said, as soon as you start to feel even a little bit bad for John he just slams his narcissistic fists down and makes you remember just what a giant PoS he is.

[@AIDS_survivor]

Does the left claim the guy who showered with his stepdaughter?

[@Chicken_Little_Syndrome]

John threatening to harass Tookie's mom isn't legal. It's also against KZbin's TOS. And John is justifying his behavior with the most obvious logical fallacies that would never withstand scrutiny in a court of law.

[@scotthogan4190]

If Rocco’s mom is in, then maybe some more people from John’s family are in….

[@Kasigi03]

But he said, " KZbin Terms of Service", so it's all good.

[@SGS2003]

"Hello, FBI? Yes, this is Stuttering John Melendez of The Howard Stern Show, and John Melendez Writer Announcer for The Tonight Show and writer of The Kareem Abdul Jamar Roast. I was contacted by agent Joe Friday but was hoping you would have Elliot Ness on the case."

[@rasalghul1263]

Dont forget he made Obama laugh

[@josephlee6554]

The old, iconic Summer Slam theme music for DabbleCon is a nice touch!

[@devoncutmore]

ABSOLUTELY BRILLIANT INTRO 👏. I LOVE THE WRESTLEMANIA 6 THEME MUSIC !

[@francisfirebug6234]

I cant wait for the arrest videos. Cardiff is tasered so many times, he turns into french fries.

[@neilplace8522]

Johns the Fuhrer of the Dabbleverse

[@From-North-Jersey]

He is at joyces house his mother didn't want him to stay with her because of the phone calls and the deliveries, The mother went to the sisters house to visit with john and is staying until john leaves.

[@TheeGlocktopus]

This is fucking depressing.

[@StevenP_462]

Indeed

[@Pauladazzle]

If he was my 60 yr old son, I would tell him to leave my home and don’t t come back! that poor lady needs this bullshit?!?! he doesn’t give a damn about her or anyone else! 😡

[@stevapalooza1]

I haven't seen someone make those flexing moves unironically since middle school

[@HardCase1911]

Guys. John is not spiraling. He js fine. Unless this lawsuit goes down, he is here until his heart or liver or gravity/inertia get him. Johns natural scumbagginess fits perfectly for this type of drag out fight.

[@mattlohr]

Good Lord, he sounds just seethingly desperate in this.

[@JDTee79]

How funny would it have been if John took a screenshot of Tookie and brought it to the NYPD or the FBI…. !!!!😂😂😂 John voice ‘Tookie made fun of my lgbt kids!!!” 😂

[@barzy9725]

To John, the couch cushion comment was an insult. He doesn't see he actually told a funny joke. He is only funny when he doesn't know he is being funny. Howard was so right. STAY GOLD JOHNNY BOY

[@williams.1130]

It would be hilarious to see john get arrested for stalking when he shows up at the next house. "He made fun of my kids!!" as they shove him in the patrol car

[@HardCase1911]

Remeber what this all about. Take 3 years of steps back. John has zero sense of humor. He js incapable of hanging at the comics table for fhat reason. He cannot joke on the fly, so he gets frustrated and levels your mom or family or physical appearance. This js the be all end all. John is himorless , boring drunk.

[@howardsternssmicrophone9332]

I'm telling ya, there is a horrorcow out there named Chance Wilkins aka Cyraxx, and the similarities between him and John are astounding. Cyraxx also like to get the law, and FBI involved to arrest the trolls.

[@mikes62soupcan]

Raxx and John would make a perfect super hero team .

[@TheAtariNetwork]

I love you lady K! #teamlisa

[@TonyMichaels166]

“You tink you kin git away wid dat? Wid-out- widout leebel-legal ramifications? Yuh outta yuh fuckin’ moind!”

[@barzy9725]

DIS, DAT, DOSE FROM THE 160 IQ ENGLISH TEACHER. WHAT A POLTROON MONTEBANK POS.

[@Kasigi03]

Don't call John's mom. Don't give John money. Just make fun of him and let the rest take action. John will f up and screw up without your help or enabling.

[@mahtinown-eel]

“Who Are These Dictators” That’s an underrated joke

[@jeremy__hopkins]

8:34 - Please don't give John money. Donate it to charity, find a talented street musician, tip a waiter, buy some gifts for a kid, even give the money to John's Mom. She's suffered for nearly 60 years. Just stop giving money to John. There has to be a point where we all say no to failing upward and being a scumbag online for superchats.

[@deadjuice1880]

If people gave money to John's mom, he'd find a way to worm it out of her. He's shameless and despicable.

[@jeremy__hopkins]

@@deadjuice1880 Maybe people can send her fresh vegetables. That's SJ Kryptonite.

[@T.M.Warren-qp2gq]

🗣John’s Ma is the epitome of ‘my son can do know wrong!’ She created a Monster so there’s no love loss here but that would never warrant me phoning an Grandma in her late 80’s …that’s the kind of ish SJ would do! 💯

[@georgechatburn1303]

Rich Vos declared himself a legend.

[@michaelblaine6494]

Yeah but he’s right

[@MightyHorse01]

Legensh

[@letsgetacid]

141 IQ

[@echo-cb9st]

Something tells me his mother is a bad mother she never taught her son some basic decency, basic hygiene basic manners etc

[@RicArmstrong]

She spoiled him.

[@harkbelial]

John and his mom are the worst.

[@randommanwill802]

I've noticed that parents who spoil their children create their own worst nightmares. StutJo's mom spoiled her son badly, so now that she's elderly and should be enjoying her golden years. I had a coworker years ago that spoiled her daughter, buying her a house and supporting her shopping sprees, all because she figured that once she retired, she could move in with her daughter. Well, she paid the house of for her daughter and her husband and they got divorced. The husband got a great lawyer and got the house in the divorce, and all he had to pay was what my former coworker paid for the house, which was about 98k. Last I heard, he sold that house for it's appreciated value and used that to get a new place. Meanwhile, my former coworker's daughter moved into her apartment and doesn't work.

[@rworded]

I blame the Mom. She's the one that gives into his every whim.

[@motorcity7137]

Everywhere you pause it , he looks like an absolute dope

[@Shroomdiffnuclear]

It's amazing how all of the Hackverse podcasts started watching John clips, Brennan, Melton, Mr.Toe, like we were not doing it for 4 years. And John loves it, any attention works for him even for the worst reasons

[@ScoutFinch713]

You win. You watch all the podcasts the longest.

[@Shroomdiffnuclear]

The point is all of them were shitting on Karl and Shuli for the same thing my dudes

[@shawnoutwest6504]

Anyone who watches KB or Aaron for more than 5m, who can " stomach " either, - has serious issues. Mental.

[@Shroomdiffnuclear]

@@shawnoutwest6504 bib bib bin, bib bib bib ,breaking news...we all have mental and social problems

[@WeeeN1287]

​@@ShroomdiffnuclearI don't think the smoothbrains got it.

[@ANDR_U]

Rich Voss is a self -proclaimed legend

[@robertfalcone3025]

He only got 5K when he sued Sharon Stone's security company btw..

[@T.M.Warren-qp2gq]

😆🤦🏽‍♂️

[@DeabByDawn]

Ssskkkkrrrrooollllaaaahhhhhh!

[@rasalghul1263]

Love how the Dabblecon promo music is from the old WWF promos for events in the early 90's

[@giannifriendly5600]

First he’s gonna beat up KB, then he’s gonna kiss all the wounds and make them feel better. He’s so thoughtful.

[@harkbelial]

I don't know if the feds have jurisdiction in my country, I better lay low for a while😂😂😂😂

[@ProfessorWingatePeaslee-lg7zs]

That's what divorce does. It brings people together.

[@Siouxperman]

Producer Chris is a funny mutha!! He’s grown on me throughout the months.

[@ChiliSkwertz]

Who’s whipping up the “I Am Legend” movie poster photoshop?

[@MrDorinoFasaad]

38:58 Rich Vos declares himself a legend constantly.

[@richarddutton1981]

...am i missing something? Is John actually bragging about how good looking his EX WIFE is? Lol thats a bizarre play my friend.

[@BaronVonCarrot]

It's so funny blind mike went on his show and said an AI john voice is impossible. I know he's blind but I think he can hear

[@LigerFan]

I think SJ is at Joyce’s house but Aase goes there every day to either help look after him or look after him while Joyce and everyone else goes off to do whatever they do.

[@stevenweishaupt8591]

Please don't be a espresso martini get tickets for dabblecon. Stutjo is so stupid he actually thought kate meaney would be interested in him.

[@blackghost1791]

JUS DEWIIIT

[@shawn_530]

Wonder if they serve them at Comedy at the Carlson?

[@markeetafarmer541]

I had said that about not knowing names. Picture some agent saying to another. "This guy got more villains bouncing around in his head than a Batman Comic"

[@LucysPop]

Trump 2024

[@malcolmtucker7981]

"Mom, please stop calling me!!"

[@glennneufield8921]

The Forest Gump, and over employed references are perfect.

[@Patriots-Inc.1776]

This will kill John if he searches his name on KZbin. The very first video that pops up when I searched “stuttering John,” on KZbin is a Shuli Network video! 😂😂😂 John needs to quit drinking and go to rehab. Maybe then he would realize a few things about life. He may be too old and stuck in his ludicrous ways to change. I hope I will never get too old and stuck in a cycle of idiocy and arrogance to be able to change.

[@Mosely2007]

His self importance I impressive. Laughter from all around right at him.. He will win a Darwim Award. People may laugh at him and his show. . Lawyer Up guys😅😅😅😅 He makes Beavis and Butthead look like geniuses

[@Doodotaboobot]

Love that Zenhauser ❤❤

[@IdealX-fr4eg]

You can't just show up at the local FBI office and start "filling" complaints he is so stupid I can't believe he made it to 60

[@Abah-cuh-bus]

Love where Karl talks about California. He’s so worldly and wise!

[@gordie1233]

Tattling john is my favorite john. Should be his new name.

[@hadrakir4098]

Suzanna really got roasted here. John is to blame.

[@Davecarlson77]

Rake-stepper is it! He's Sideshow Bob

[@TonyJacket]

The guy in the bottom panel looks like Kevin Brennan's producer if he visited Chernobyl.

[@henrywheeler8500]

"You dun fucked up"

[@StevenP_462]

Zen I'm glad to hear your voice for once

[@PsyChris1]

At least John doesn't hoard the wishes of his supporters!!!

[@randommanwill802]

Remember when john called Trump from California and California is a two party consent state but John said he was safe because he routed his call through his buddy in New York or something? Funny how that saved him with the Trump call but Kate can't rely on being in New York to save her from the StutJo call.

[@T.M.Warren-qp2gq]

🗣 I’m coming round to understanding why John’s Dad inflicted punishment on his wayward son because he saw in John a spoilt belligerent brat who could do no wrong in his Mothers eyes! 💯 #johnsdaddidnowrong

[@edf9682]

I just stumbled onto your page… wtf happened to Stuttering John?!?! Holy crap… shocking since I haven’t heard about him for years…🤦🏼‍♂️😆

[@spacenerd9499]

CBEST is like 8th grade math, reading, writing MAX

[@AlexandrovitchA]

So MissyB ISNT an antisemite? :(

[@dildoswaggins3724]

That’s disappointing

[@CristianoFénix-z4b]

Why it brought John and his ex together: Ex: what is this dabble verse? John : it’s great I make 100,000/year Ex: *hangs up to dial her lawyer*

[@Mydemonsayshello]

15:30 you can tell his X scared him.

[@splatjack666]

Being familiar with the area, I could recommend some choice areas in Rockford for John to meet Melton. Problem solved!

[@howardsternssmicrophone9332]

Stuttering John Melendez is almost to the point of being a Horrorcow. I haven't being keeping up with the Dabbleverse the past several months, and thought I'd come back to see what was going down. So he's living with his mom now?

[@SaraDeppening]

Ass-y knew her kids were being beaten… but she’s a saint, y’know.

[@craigsewell9335]

Hello Mr. Melendez, Efrem Zimbalist Jr. here

[@Linabeina]

John has Witch fingers...