Old is the worst movie of 2021???

[@marymac3572]

This all sounds like a really weird game of Sims at turbo speed.

[@29jgirl92]

Now THAT would have been a good ending!

[@macaronnotmacadamia222]

Sims horror movie could actually be a pretty good concept.

[@keshagriffin3375]

It has so much potential.

[@viscountrainbows6452]

@@macaronnotmacadamia222 Judging by how people on KZbin like to torture Sims, this wouldn't be a horrible idea tbqh. Like, mysterious tragedies continue to afflict a family, slowly driving them mad; mysterious people continue to shuffle in and out and/or die; ghosts, Death himself making appearances; spontaneous blessings bring them to the point of hope and are suddenly taken away, driving them to despair etc. Then it's revealed to be the machinations of some bored lunatic God who delights in the suffering of his playthings.

[@macaronnotmacadamia222]

@@viscountrainbows6452 This honestly sounds like a really good movie. At the end it's just someone saying "Welp I'm bored" and never opens the game file again just for some realism

[@edgarnello9165]

I just think its funny how they chose to show us a teenager who is mentally a child get pregnant but they didn't show us a dead dog or a girl falling of a cliff.

[@slushpuppie19]

I was waiting the whole movie to see a body decompose before our eyes and we didn't get it. Boo

[@YB-sm4we]

PLEASE SOMEONE TELL ME HOW ON EARTH SHE GOT PREGNANT BEFORE SHE GOT HER PERIOD

[@slushpuppie19]

@@YB-sm4we If 30 mins passing is equivalent to a year then all the women are getting their periods for a few seconds every 2 mins lol. The amount of blood and tissue actually lost must just be minimal. So she'd probably already had a few periods before she even went in the tent.

[@slushpuppie19]

@@YB-sm4we If you actually watched the film I swear that the unexplained bits of plot like that would actually bother you way less than the dialogue which is just clunky af 😂 I still really enjoyed it though haha

[@Hyyacinth]

so many shots of teenagers in skimpy bikinis and showing their cleavage at times, you can tell the movie was directed by gross men with gross fantasies. That's also the reason why they show a teenager who is mentally a child pregnant and not a dead dog or a girl falling off a cliff :/

[@k_airo]

If the baby died from neglect/starvation within a couple of minutes, wouldn't ALL of the characters need to be constantly eating, as well as shitting, sleeping and every other bodily function?

[@dontcall9912]

@@Natg6 so what did it die of ? because neglect doesn't directly cause death it would need to be neglect that leads to starvation that causes death.

[@JamesSmith-wt3xi]

They explain it in the movie (just like everything else unfortunately): the children are growing bigger and therefore require food to increase mass. The adults are NOT growing and do not require constant food. The baby, not being able to eat for a couple seconds (or a couple days worth of 'beach time'), dies from starvation.

[@KrillLiberator]

It'd be an incredible film. Still wouldn't wanna watch it.

[@thefacebehindthemask7007]

@@JamesSmith-wt3xi That still makes no sense at all.

[@luiginastro8831]

"Ssssssht don't ask questions and get suprised by my tWiSt eNdInG" M. Night, probably

[@EV6CrashCam]

i like how the moral of this movie is “don’t waste time because you’ll never get it back” but going and watching it is a waste of time itself

[@everett791]

Actually watching a movie makes you more intelligent so it’s not entirely useless

[@sail4170]

Dead asf.

[@angelabernal4076]

M. Night gave us a bruh moment

[@NIHIL_EGO]

@@everett791 I don't think it's as simple as that.

[@gvtterslag]

Me and a friend are going to see it Saturday basically just for the laugh. We do the same with most blumhouse films that come out basically because most if them are unintentionally hilarious.

[@ameliatoney7370]

Little plot hole, but if you swam in the ocean on the island, wouldn’t you immediately die anyway because the time you’re holding your breath for is much longer than it seems??

[@hi_imfatty6178]

Another plot hole, wouldn’t they have starved to death???

[@squares4u]

Or died from sun exposure? As in, they’re out in the sun unprotected for years and years on end? Hello skin cancer

[@froggygalaxy]

Or died from the speed your body is aging?

[@ledrippp0099]

or poop every seconds lol

[@kellylockwood8287]

@@ledrippp0099 "just constant, constant dysentery"

[@sadiedurham9461]

i personally HATE it when the twist is "it was all an experiment". you can literally justify anything by making it an "experiment". not only is it boring, but its lazy because it's so popular and easy to do.

[@marink7332]

i have to say that it probably would have been a good twist/explaination - considering the content of the movie beforehand - if it hadn't been so stupid and shoved in there.

[@Shawno625]

I think it was cool in that one goosebumps episode when they were at camp though

[@KtheKing01]

Same as the classic "it was all a dream" ending, if you use it right it can be cool as hell, but if it's just shoved in there because the writers wanted to tie up loose ends that _weren't_ supposed to be tied up, it sucks ass

[@sadiedurham9461]

@@KtheKing01 it was all a dream is SO COOL when what happened is something that could have happened in real life, because then its really shocking. but when its just used to explain away impossible things its annoying

[@エイジャ]

The only movie I’ll give a pass to with this trope is Cabin In The Woods. They dissect it in a unique way, especially by introducing it in the beginning

[@Forestfreud]

I’ll never forget being in line to see a star wars movie and listening to a bunch of nerdy dudes discussing movies when one of them said “the best M. Night Shamalayan plot twist would be if you watched a whole movie, it was good, and when you got to the end, the credits rolled and you see ‘directed by Stephen Spielberg’”

[@screamindog8772]

sounds like my kind of nerdy dudes

[@cutiexd1145]

I like how you went out of your way to credit him lol

[@fightinggamegeek9238]

Those nerdy dudes are right though…

[@THED3ADLY7]

Now that would be a good plot twist definitely better than this movie’s. They should also have like every character be M.Night himself in different outfits. Now that would be a movie I would see. Directed by someone else but M.Night

[@kyk5456]

Wait I don’t understand 😭

[@victoriablake3826]

I felt like shyamalan was beating over the head the entire time like “DO YOU GET IT?? DO YOU GET IT?????? THEYRE WASTING THEIR LIVES. ITS ALL A METAPHOR”

[@RiotWild]

"ASK ME WHAT IT MEANS!"

[@infiniteshay8660]

It's a poor metaphor because if that's what they wanted to portray then the side effect of the beach would be no one's fault. They wouldnt be there for a reason outside of themselves.

[@runewarrior43]

@@infiniteshay8660 That’s the problem with Shyamalan creating all these new plot points so nothing was left open ended. Sandcastle was meant to be more of a modern day fable, an open ended story that doesn’t really have a plot but is used to make you think about something, in this case how are you spending the time you are alive.

[@infiniteshay8660]

@@runewarrior43 Yeah he thinks he's an artist but art doesn't have to treat the audience like they are idiots.

[@AuDHDarling]

@@RiotWild I really, really hope that Shyamalan continues making movies long enough for him to scream this during one of his cameos

[@lilium8829]

The whole thing about the girl becoming a teen and suddenly becoming pregnant actually sends me chills down my spine , because not only is it creepy but in a way it’s just extremely wrong

[@KrillLiberator]

I mean, I get that the metabolic passage of time for their bodies is accel'd, but their perception of time is not. So, if your two children (young teen or pre-teen even) hook up for a playdate and, within three minutes, are *fucking*, there are some big issues to have a really serious discussion about and probably the Social Services are going to be pretty pissed about it too. Real-life scenario: Boy doesn't have the guts to ask the nice girl out. Leaves it til next time. Dies of old age next day.

[@Cinnaschticks]

Actually, I don't want to know, no one tell me.

[@teddieblue6723]

Three poings of life and some dude probably is enjoying it. Yeah its creepy

[@v0ldy54]

Tbf I loved that part because of those reasons

[@KingOfGaymes]

@@v0ldy54 It’s really creepy to “love” that part because of the subject matter..

[@l4ndst4nder]

“I don’t believe that the person who wrote this film has talked with people” Yup sounds like an M. Night movie.

[@MrOverHeels]

"What? Noo"

[@josephstacy821]

Sorry M. Night you seem like a nice person but you know there are apps for this right?

[@mirandastewart3544]

@@josephstacy821 Do you mean, Google Translate?

[@NCcatlady]

He went from Unbreakable and The sixth sense to movies like this I just can’t believe the man who made those has made every movie after that

[@thedawn_isyourenemy7994]

the same guy who butchered Avatar the Last Airbender

[@toddsaskatchewan]

I guess the island was feeding and hydrating them? Wouldn't they be dead from dehydration after just a couple of minutes? (if a month passes every 2.5 minutes)

[@Corrupted_flesh]

I didn't even think of that but you're so right

[@royce6491]

Also oxygen. Like we need to breath multiple times per minute so even if they were hyperventilating they probably wouldn’t even be able to get enough oxygen.

[@nickjoy6389]

THATS LITERALLY WHAT I WAS SAYING WHEN I WATCHED IITTTT!!!! The baby wouldn’t have made it two seconds into the pregnancy, unless she was eating and drinking every single minute. And yes of course everyone else! Also they should’ve been shedding like snakes, and teeth falling out 🤣

[@harmzwaneveld9445]

When are we going to get the ''Old: director's bacon cut'' edition? Get M. Night on the phone!

[@cierpie8874]

The island only does damage to them if it's convenient for the plot ✨

[@sabrexi7228]

This is the problem when grounding a concept like this in reality, EVERYTHING can happen if you think hard enough. Technically, they should’ve been dead immediately, because they would need to be hyperventilating to get enough oxygen since a day passes by every 5 seconds (I did the math). Leaving it open ended puts these problems on the back burner so you’re audience doesn’t question “but wouldn’t x happen?”

[@cuteigu8636]

And you would have to eat and drink pretty much constantly as well.

[@ggundercover3681]

@@cuteigu8636 and shit. don't forget shit.

[@Monochrome2004]

@@cuteigu8636 would of been much more interesting if they went on a frenzy for food and water since they'd have to be eating and drinking constantly

[@dontcall9912]

The director didn't expect people to actual think like use our brains and just wanted us to sit back and enjoy the half-arsed "horror" movie.

[@DoNutx777]

For someone who have read the graphic novel, it seems like all this plot holes are made ironically by forcing to put some internal logics and rules. The original are smart enough not to try to explain everything

[@TheTwilightearth]

of course they want to write a female character getting pregnant, but heaven forbid she has any periods...

[@shh-94]

p-periods... 😱😵🤢🤮

[@Dreamworld789_]

I don’t think that’s serving the story in any way especially since this movie already has no reason to be made or has nothing really to it. And if they did add it it would be barely in the movie and then so many people would day *why do they only bring periods up briefly*

[@maccheese2509]

The only movie I know of that includes Periods is Carrie, but it's terrible representation because Carrie gets bullied about it by other girls because she didn't know what a period was😕💔 Of course it's still a good movie but I wish that handled and represented it better

[@heaventremblay3659]

A period would go by so fast tho so it really doesn’t matter

[@Dreamworld789_]

Mac & Cheese Its a good representation in that film she’s a young girl becoming a woman and it still shows the struggles when crossing over periods, bullying and learning. It show how cruel people can be while also showing Carrie is growing but these girls obviously have not

[@TheOther-Dude]

Me: Oh cool a black character - He's a rapper Me:..oh - His name is Mid Sized Sudan Me: Oh? -He's the only one that's murdered and doesn't die from aging like everyone else. Me: Bruh..

[@faxgirl4666]

Very interesting indeed

[@leslyvaldiviamarquez8241]

I literally watched the movie today and I got to that part and had to look away I was so upset about it. Like at this point I should not be surprised anymore but I was still disappointed.

[@Flyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy]

What kind of name is that? I really hope that's his rapper name cause I guess that's decent

[@ggundercover3681]

tbh it gets to the point where I usually watch movie for giggles and tell my friend my prediction. 9 of 10 times it actually is correct. what I hate the most is when the black character is like the only one who wants to get out and run, basically the only normal one. and they still die. but the white cast stay living through shit they shouldn't be. at that point it's more comedy than horror

[@dullpoint1072]

@ꕥ𝑉𝑎𝑛𝑖𝑙𝑙𝑎•𝑣ℎ𝑠ꕥ he didn't die for "no" reason. He died bc he was an innocent black man. A white guy targeted him bc of his race.

[@TomEyeTheSFMguy]

The baby died from looking around and realizing "oh god, I'm in an M. Night Shyamalan movie. Fuck this!" then just dying.

[@Stormlywing]

unless the baby died because of is bones getting broken if your body too small and you become 13 your HEART will be killed before is even grows up bones may have killed the Heart

[@catboy_official]

Honestly that's understandable

[@reyrapids63]

While the comic also has the creepy stuff with the kid, it avoids 90% of the movies pitfalls because it just doesn't explain anything. It is just 'you are trapped on this cursed beach, you will die in a few hours, what do you do with the time remaining?" And that is so much scarier than any twist Shamalan could throw in. We never get closure it is just some weird cosmic event that is indifferent to the suffering it causes

[@sleepythemis]

Yeah, the comic was merely trying to be like a moral fable of sorts with a horror backdrop, instead of purely a horror story, and works out better that way because fables are vehicles for a message and not for a plot.

[@gray9606]

Agreed. To me, it reminds me of Junji Ito’s (horror mangaka) writing, it leaves you asking questions and open answered ideas that you get to ponder on. The confusion makes it all the more terrifying

[@meg2288]

I’m kinda pissed that we didn’t get that ending

[@reyrapids63]

@@meg2288 yeah it was really nihilistic and kinda gave the whole misery a point rather than just pure edginess for no reason

[@marinaatkin1581]

That sounds like a really good Junji Ito story tbh

[@CrackySue]

If the baby died of neglect or hunger why didn't literally everybody else die of malnutrition :/ I know it's just a bad movie but damn thats bothering me lmao

[@vanessar.6085]

I didn't watch the movie and hearing that confused me so much.

[@nolaray1062]

Newborns eat every couple of hours. Maybe they were basing it off adults technically being able to go longer without food? Idk that’s the only thing I could think. 🤷🏻‍♂️

[@SjofnBM1989]

@@nolaray1062 it stil takes a baby roughly the same amount of time as an adult to fully starve to death. So if every hour is roughly 2 years then everyone should be starving to death after like 2 minutes of not eating if I'm doing the math right

[@JustAHorrorShow]

They should be constantly eating like competitive eaters in order to avoid starvation. But I think even someone who is capable of eating a mountain of hotdogs in under a minute is likely to starve to death. Even that's not enough food to sustain the body in this weird rapid aging thing.

[@MystiqMiu]

i laughed at that scene when watching bc it was such a Sudden Choice, right, and then I later hear that the baby actually continues living in the original novel so it was REALLY A CHOICE, LMAOO

[@ante8428]

Okay, I did the math. A period (let's say about 5 days long over the 12 months of the year) would equal 86,400 minutes, a whole year is 525,600 minutes and if a year is 30 minutes long then we multiply those 30 with the minutes a period -in a year- takes (86,400) and divide it by the year (525,600), the result being your whole period cycle happening in 4.9 minutes, if we divide that by 12 (which would be the months) your entire 5 day period cycle would last about 0.41 minutes and it would keep happening in periods of time that allow 4.9 minutes of period in 30 minutes

[@voidify3]

God damn it seasons of love is stuck in my head again. FIVE HUNDRED TWENTY FIVE THOUSAND SIX HUNDRED MINUTES-

[@keke9795]

@@voidify3 I SANG IT WHEN I READ IT 😂

[@chideraalexanderdex547]

Damn... That doesn't sound fun. You would never not have blood on you and the window for conception would be so narrow I'm shocked she got pregnant at all

[@Cinnaschticks]

That sounds ⭐awful⭐

[@Gummyskeleton]

The comic is like, actually creepy AND sad, like it’s actually good, they shouldn’t have let this become a movie and just, maybe a small art adaptation

[@WobblesandBean]

The ending of the comic is so hauntingly beautiful, poignant, and tragic. Aaaaaaand ShamblesOn went and aaaaallllllll over it.

[@fuckwit107]

Ohh man, I just read it and it's very dark. Very, very good though.

[@donniepatt9514]

At the very least get a different director

[@luiginastro8831]

@@donniepatt9514 I'd say writer, 'cause Shyamalamadingdong knows how to direct a movie. He just has to stop _writing_ them.

[@MsTriangle]

Nah, he cannot direct either

[@canniblanch]

I want someone to make a horror movie about a director making good movies and then suddenly none of his movies are good and the plot twist is that he's actually Shyamalan

[@TheEmbessyNetwork]

Shyamalan would cameo as his own assistant in the film trying to whisper twist endings in his ear.

[@Panurus_biarmicus]

If Shymalan made that movie he could play himself making the movies, would blow the twist but guess that also fits

[@daimen06]

😄🤣

[@lesaubergines]

Dude you could actually make this into a decent thriller. A guy lives in his own fantasy world where he’s an amazing director, he builds it all... and then it’s revealed it’s some coping mechanism he developed to escape guilt from murdering his family.. kinda like Shutter Island?

[@Lobboi]

Watch the ABC horror short films there is one about the director trying to make a good film

[@notthatnick5546]

I think the main problem here is that M. Night Shyamalan cherry-picked the rules of this movie’s diegesis to fit the plot he wanted to explore. When you think about it realistically, if the characters don’t eat for 30 minutes, they technically don’t eat for a whole year and should die of starvation. They don’t drink water for 30 minutes? They should die of dehydration. After 1 hour, their hair should be insanely long, just like their nails. The men’s beard would constantly be growing, the women would be constantly having their period, their skin would be burned to a crisp by the sun… The way the characters heal is further evidence of this; their bodies are enslaved by the beach’s time acceleration. Clearly, the baby who died of “neglect” was a victim of that acceleration logic, since it was left alone just a few moments. But the other characters weren’t affected that way; their appearance changed (in an incoherent/inconsistent way, as you noted), with only ageing and a few body functions being accelerated. And that makes absolutely no sense. To me, this whole baby episode should not have been in the movie. When you build a book/movie/comic world, you have to make some rules and abide by them. Otherwise, you end up with an illogical, incoherent and chaotic mess of a story. It would have been better to not explain anything. The beach is cursed, it has some weird ageing effect, we can't explain it, it's horrible and unfair. Boom. The rules are simple this way : we don't know them. If you start explaining an element logically, all the other elements start requiring an explanation too. It really pains me to see M. Night Shyamalan doing a shit movie again. To this day, “The Sixth Sense” is one of my favourite movies. I also enjoyed “Signs”, “The Lady in the Water” and even “The Village”. They were not perfect, but they were enjoyable at least. So we know M. Night Shyamalan CAN make good movies. I can’t wait for the day he remembers how to build a coherent/consistent movie universe.

[@ladykinsei]

Agree! I love the comic and I can see that as a piece of art that we know the meaning of all that at the end... so idk why m night shyamalan trying to explain everything and ruin the meaning of the art itself.

[@notthatnick5546]

@@ladykinsei Exactly! :) Imagine if in The Sixth Sense, M. Night Shyamalan had decided to explain every single supernatural phenomenon. The movie would have been ruined! This little kid can see dead people. All right. They don't always interact the same way with him; some seem to tell him about past events (like when he knew the nickname of his teacher), but some just yell or scare him. Fine. Some have the appearance they had when they died (like the poisoned little girl), others don't (Bruce Willis's character). OK, noted. We are also never told why he can see dead people; no explanation is given. There are no "clear" rules, and it's PERFECT that way. It builds a cinematic universe of mystery that is very enjoyable and that lets you make up your own theories. In college, in one of my creative writing classes, our professor told us that one of the biggest mistakes you can make as an author is taking your readers/viewers for idiots by over-explaining things. And with movies like this, it really feels like M. Night Shyamalan is taking us all for idiots.

[@notthatnick5546]

@@Natg6 which movie are you talking about?

[@buttercupkat]

Perhaps only people born on the beach are more susceptible to the negatives due to their minds and bodies being too weak, and the reason why the children live is that they're old enough to think and do things on their own?

[@notthatnick5546]

@@buttercupkat That's actually a pretty good theory. 😊

[@pumpkyn904]

I saw a praising review for this movie from some guy who’s only counterpoint to the criticism was “oh what, you’re gonna let the period thing stop you from enjoying the movie?” Uh, yeah, I am. It’s dumb and distracting. If you’re going to have a pregnancy in your horror movie where the entire gimmick is that people are developing and cycling way faster than usual then you need to explain how menstruation and ovulation work within the lore. And if that’s somehow too hard, then here’s a million dollar idea: *don’t have a child pregnancy subplot.*

[@ggundercover3681]

at the veery least, say they have PCOS and it manifests in her getting infrequent periods. ppl who have PCOS can still get pregnant. it may be a slimmer chance, but still possible. I would know. then boom, at least the question of her constantly getting her period before pregnancy was at least attempted to be remedied.

[@3333EEEErawr]

It’s amazing how little people know (or care to learn) about periods.

[@somedude172]

@@Natg6 theyd be really fast, but almost constant, so imo, she likely wouldnt have one bc her body was developing so fast. but then she couldnt get pregnant either, so..

[@KeyLewis97]

well given the fact that an average menstrual cycle lasts 2 to 7 it would make sense that it would literally last 1/4 of a second or even less than that. it wouldn’t be nowhere near being even slightly noticeable plus they’re so overwhelmed that it’s something that wouldn’t even cross their minds

[@luiginastro8831]

@@3333EEEErawr That was not the point of the comment, but go off

[@osakablinladen]

"they get no character development other than sexual attraction" sounds like an accurate depiction of puberty to me

[@pommedeter7407]

Actually you forgot depression

[@connoraugh1626]

gayness occasionally

[@KrillLiberator]

@@connoraugh1626 That's still sexual attraction.

[@CyclingUrchin]

@@KrillLiberator gayness isn't just sexual. Romance and just general love

[@luiginastro8831]

Basically Riverdale. Or any trashy teen drama.

[@mers624]

I can’t wait to see the sequel “Bald”.

[@kenzood5290]

bald, old and full of mold

[@AW-hn6ro]

Rember the trilogy Old, bald, and fat. I feel like fat would be problematic

[@mers624]

@@AW-hn6ro LOL Old as a title for a horror movie makes me laaaaugh. Fat… LMAO

[@trinaq]

Me too, I'd definitely be interested in seeing a trilogy. Maybe "Broke" could be next?

[@sheepgrass500]

@@kenzood5290 pure poetry

[@pomegranatepotions]

{SPOILER for the comic] [u shld just read it tbh it takes like ten minutes] the baby dying is probably the stupidest change in the whole thing. she (shes a daughter in the comic) lasts the longest in the comic, and the last visual is her making sandcastles as a grown woman, surrounded by the elderly corpses of the only people she's ever known, doomed to live the same fate. the comic itself is honestly just mostly okay, but that part was the only thing that had any emotional impact

[@jimbaflimba877]

OOOOO IS THE COMIC STILL FOR SALE? I WANNA BUY IT

[@shadow_shine3578]

Where can I find the comic? The idea is pretty interesting.

[@WobblesandBean]

The scene before that one, where the refugee tells the others a bedtime story so they can fall asleep and die peacefully, was also really touching and beautiful.

[@WobblesandBean]

@@jimbaflimba877 You can find it....ahem. Places. On the internet.

[@DoNutx777]

Yeah, for me it shows the cruel, apathetic flow time, which seems like the punchline for the whole story. Having the baby died instantly, why not just remove that pregnancy plot altogether

[@nosyDetective]

I hate when movies use child death as a "gotcha, this is a dark movie!" moment. It makes me so upset. You can tell this movie was directed by a man because there's sex and pregnancy but not periods.

[@Ravenpoe121]

While this was a terrible movie, Mid-Sized Sedan is a great rapper name and I will die on this hill.

[@ggundercover3681]

at first I was like absolutely no. what a horrible name. but the more I hear and say it, the more I agree with you. it has some good potential.

[@lilacs_echoing]

@@ggundercover3681 the name is just so.. unintentionally funny. I feel like if that was the name of a rapper who had the kind of verses that are super funny and ridiculous it would be a real hit

[@47ratsinahoodie]

@@ggundercover3681 Same, I keep reading and saying it and it just sounds great now

[@FranNyan]

A rapper trying to appeal to the soccer mom crowd

[@Shawno625]

Its always lil [insert name here] gotta change it up sometimes

[@peachy_lili]

the thing I don't get about M. Night is... he picks a source story that fits his whole "modern fairy tale" thing... then proceeds to strip out everything about it that makes it any sort of parable and just turns it into gimmicky horror. you had the right source material for your vibe, man. and you chucked the good stuff. again. why.

[@wr36gc]

You’re soo right it frustrating. I think he’s trying to turn everything into a thriller without understanding the actual story beat 🙄

[@Wardog01Actual]

"All you had to do was follow the damn story, C.J!" - Big Smoke

[@rejectedideas1827]

@@Wardog01Actual MNight may start adaptation of gtasa

[@Wardog01Actual]

@@rejectedideas1827 Do not give him any ideas! We can't afford it. I'm sure he would find a way to make O.G. Loc the main character. And NOBODY wants that!

[@lynpotter6471]

Because he's a hack. He doesn't know what makes something good, he just got lucky once or twice and is now unsuccessfully trying to recreate the magic. Since he thinks it was something he did intentionally, he now overwrites everything until there's no chance of it being decent.

[@riddleboxx]

The whole baby thing could have opened up such an interesting door too; like watching it grow and having a new actor every couple of minutes but they just killed it for no reason whatsoever

[@ASK2286]

The period/constant bleeding was exactly what came to mind when I saw the kid pregnant in the trailer. Also shouldn't the guys be rapidly growing beards? And everyone's hair in general?

[@__kikibunz__4285]

It was shortly explained in the movie that bc the hair and nails are dead cells that it stays the same or something silly like that

[@kaykayl100]

@@__kikibunz__4285 I had a huge problem with the explanation because your hair and nails still grow from your roots and nail beds

[@meg2288]

@@glowingfoxesunderthebed yes. It would’ve been way more horrifying than the woman braking her bones till she died. That shit was just funny tbh

[@midnight_rose2337]

The women should have been having constant periods, since thirty minutes was said to be a full year.

[@supersonicuu3161]

1,000 like! Also agreed

[@trinaq]

I can't believe that Trent and Kara would even know what sex was at their age. True, their hormones would be rampant as they rapidly age, but they're still young enough to find it gross.

[@adecentcucumber5582]

i think theyre parents mightve been really open abt it but idk

[@heath6802]

Right? Like their mental ages would still probably have them in the “eww cooties” frame of mind, even if their bodies say a different story

[@Starburst514]

I remember other kids when I was that little talking about sex, but thinking it was like kissing or holding hands, and one or two kids actually knew what it was and logic was "grown ups do it when they like each other bit liking boys/girls is gross" so...maybe rampant hormones they might still find it gross but also "I guess I like you so I guess we have ti now" but then like...it be with so much more naivete logic and I doubt they'd actually...know where everything went. It literally makes more sense that the SAND got her pregnant as like circle of life stuff

[@pentagramgalaxy]

The only way I could see it working out is if it was like completely accidental. Like they accidentally touch each others privates and it just escalated from there

[@887frodo]

Not all kinds perceive sexuality at the same age. I was a very sexually aware kid. So much so there are stories in my family about it. That’s why, when it comes to this kind of hypothetical scenarios, I just take the info at face value. Kids are, by and large, more perceptive than we give them credit for.

[@sleepyboynico426]

So basically, none of the characters die of old age which was like... the scariest concept and the whole point of the beach 😭

[@lucasispapyrus901]

@@Natg6 they never die of Specifically old age just the aging of the beach so

[@prettylittlediaries4690]

I think the grandma did

[@enkiitu]

The father and morder did. Also, the old woman did as well.

[@keikei8598]

I just wanna know who the hell greenlighted the whole "the 4 year old gets pregnant" thing... Who heard that and went "yeah this is fine this is normal this is a normal idea a normal person would have we shouldnt be concerned about this!!"

[@carmiesinagra8968]

LITERALLY!! I just can’t get over that. WHY WAS IT NECESSARY

[@veri_cherri8521]

D I S G U S T I N G

[@LL-tr5et]

greenlit* but i totally agree!!!

[@somegrill7561]

RIGHT?? but somehow I’m not surprised

[@keikei8598]

@@LL-tr5et ty!!

[@mjchats7998]

I'm very uncomfortable with the fact that the scares from this movie seem to come from the bodies of chronically ill people. As a disabled person, it feels like a bunch of abled people talking about how horrific my life must be.

[@dontmindme9046]

I mean, being chronically ill makes life horrific more often than not. I would know, I suffer physically and mentally every waking moment without rest, I'm unable to get the care I need AND I don't have any support system. No family, no friends, just me and my abusive narc addict mom. I'd rather be dead, this isn't living. "Living" like this is inhumane. Torture.

[@thegillmanedits]

Yeah, like, chronic illness rules 'n' stuff.

[@ComfyCatNya]

M. Night loves to make spectacles of “different” people 🙄🙄

[@nkbujvytcygvujno6006]

Yeah, but the main problem in most disabled people’s lives is that they’re forcibly denied even the most basic accommodations, when they don’t have to be. The prices of every mobility aid keeps rising unnecessarily because no one who needs one can turn them down no matter how costly they make it, people legally can lose all accommodations at work/school/etc if they have even a cent more than $2000 in the bank because of unnecessary SSI laws, if you’re “mentally disabled” in any way you can have all your independent legal rights taken away by your abusive parents at any age, don’t even get me started on the medical industry being allowed to legally deny and overcharge treatment if they think your life’s not worth it, etc. Disability is only hard to live with because this classist, capitalist society takes advantage of it. That’s what disabled advocates are fighting for. It’s not like being disabled means your life actually HAS to be a living torture pit. And no one listens to them about that. That’s why “Oh, disabled lives just HAVE to be torturous!” messages in media are so fucking terrible, they’re encouraging the “Welp, surely there’s nothing more to be done!” mentality.

[@NiGHTSIntoMemes]

@@nkbujvytcygvujno6006 Exactly!! THANK you.

[@rzum81]

This should have been a whole movie on wearing sunscreen at the beach. Those sun rays can really age you and make you look old. Would have been more of a twist.

[@whatdoyousuppose]

So I’ve never seen this movie but I’m confused why people aren’t suddenly dropping dead of starvation/lack of water/not breathing enough, like, if time is progressing rapidly wouldn’t you have to consume more food/water/air? So if that’s the reason they use to justify why the baby died, why didn’t anyone else die in a similar way? I’m so confused lmao

[@notthecutestanimal8849]

before i say this, i do not think old is a good or logically sound movie, but the baby didn’t die of dehydration/starvation but inattention. i don’t remember if its a proven fact or just an old wives tale but the idea goes that even if a baby has all their food/water needs taken care of but they don’t get physical attention, they’ll die

[@whatdoyousuppose]

@@notthecutestanimal8849 ah ok thank you! I must’ve missed that. Still wondering though, and maybe the film explains this, why there wasn’t anyone who would just drop dead due to malnourishment/lack of exercise/etc bc of the time dilation.

[@notthecutestanimal8849]

@@whatdoyousuppose unfortunately we're all going to be left wondering that, because instead of sticking to the original graphic novel's style of it largely being metaphorical, M. Night decided to try and explain it with drug trials and a magic tunnel. Which just left it in an uncanny zone between just being a metaphor and having an explanation for everything (also ik the coral tunnel was a part of the original ending but the creator decided against it because it went against the rest of he book so like... listen to your predecessors M. Night, damn. how do you take such good works of fiction and mess it up so bad)

[@primroseprom]

If everything alive on the beach is rapidly aging to the point that setting the baby down for two seconds is enough to cause it to die of neglect, then that leaves two questions: 1. Why is no one else dying for dehydration/malnutrition? 2. Shouldn’t the sperm have died almost as soon as the guy finished? I was gonna go on this whole tangent about the likelihood of the girl getting pregnant because each month is 2 minutes and 30 seconds long and so that likely means that for 30 seconds every 2.5 minutes, she’s on her period and won’t get pregnant, then there’s another, brief 30 second period where she’s ovulating and would likely get pregnant, then around a minute and a half in between where she’s unlikely to get pregnant before the cycle starts over. And then i realized that even then it doesn’t make sense because as I just stated before this point, if EVERYTHING is rapidly aging, then the sperm should have died as soon as the guy finished. It just doesn’t make sense and honestly just screams fetishization

[@minale3604]

The director probably did it for shock value

[@gwendolynrobinson3900]

There is a lot of unexplained stuff yes, but as for the baby dying and no one else dying of starvation, the characters declared the baby died from lack of attention in the few seconds it was put on a towel to be swaddled and not on its mother's chest. As for the adults not starving, the children were the ones that were ravenous as their bodies grew, and only when they became adults did their appetites die down. The adults didn't have any growing to do, so they didn't need food as badly as the children did. I can see the baby dying of the same thing, since babies bodies do a lot of growing within the first few months/year(s)

[@primroseprom]

@@gwendolynrobinson3900 Still, if everything is rapidly aging, why don’t the guy’s sperm die as soon as he finishes. Sperm can survive up to five days within the female reproductive tract but when 1 day is (about) 5 seconds, then they only have 25 seconds to make it to the egg. It takes sperm anywhere between a few minutes to 12 hours to reach an egg but we need to remember that they’re still moving at a normal pace with everyone else. So unless this guy has the usain bolt of sperm, those things are dying. On top of that, if the reason the baby died once it was born was because of malnutrition because it was at a period in its life where it needed to be fed a shit ton, why didn’t it die in the womb? Wouldn’t it still need to be fed during that time? Why is it that the rules of malnutrition only came into effect after? *Edited because I was wrong witn the calculations. I originally said that five days would amount to 2 minutes and 5 seconds for the character when really 5 days is 25 seconds for them.*

[@gwendolynrobinson3900]

@@primroseprom dude I just watched the movie 2 weeks ago im just explaining things the way they did in the movie fam

[@gabriellazane673]

You can get pregnant on ur period it’s just less likely to happen

[@bugsyboy]

M. Night has a record of villainizing disorders, I’m not surprised this was bad

[@Roblox-jb2vf]

that's the thing that bothers me the most, to be a good artist you have to take constructive criticism and grow from it... there was so much backlash after Split, but he decided it was a good idea to do it... again??? Like wtf no wonder his movies have been so shit, he got lucky with a couple good movies, got a big ego and never looked back.

[@whatisupbruh2738]

Tbh I don’t think Sandcastles was even a good comic to adapt anyway. Like it’s overwhelmingly open-ended and unexplained which would have been an undertaking for anyone to adapt, so M. night screwed himself from the jump

[@Guremien]

Bad novel. Still gives me nausea.

[@cthulhutheendless1587]

It’s a good book, but the worst thing ever for adaptation. General audiences want answers, and M Night’s gonna give those answers to them. Sandcastle is pretty dismissive of any answers its characters suggest in its own plot.

[@zoeelizabweth]

It’s like when he tried to make season 1 of ATLA (which he never actually watched) into movie. The appeal of ATLA is the storyline and diversity so when you take out both it sucks.

[@games_on_phone89]

ari aster?

[@micahcook2408]

@@cthulhutheendless1587 yeah this wouldve been better for an A24 adaptation if anything. The whole “controlled experiment” could’ve been hinted at just like in the comics with the little boy getting shot down.

[@dudeman1983]

So, if 30 minutes = a year, one second is ~5 hours of aging. Setting the baby down for 5 seconds is already more than a day of neglect. But if the baby needs immediate care and feeding to survive, why don't the other people on the beach need to eat constantly to stay alive? They'd literally need to eat a full days worth of food every 5 seconds if we followed the standards set by the baby, which would make for a short movie, sure, but still why just the baby? Does the beach just hate babies? Does the director?

[@kraziiXIII]

From what I remember from other reviews who talk about the comic it is based on, the baby survives and is the last survivor. M Night just didn't want to deal with a baby from the comic.

[@DestineeSykes]

@@kraziiXIII incest baby????

[@sprinklesandwrinkles]

I just keep thinking that if the labor lasted an hour, the kid is already 2 years. Noway she would survive that...

[@kraziiXIII]

@@DestineeSykes i misheard something in another review and should've checked before I posted that comment since I haven't read the graphic novel.

[@DestineeSykes]

@@kraziiXIII oh ok i haven't read the comic either and just had a bit of a shock lmao it's all good

[@mareike2559]

Lowkey love the name Midsize Sedan tho like imagine the convo “Who’s your favourite artist?” “Midsize Sedan.”

[@dontpickonme]

If pregnancy is possible, the women should be getting a period every couple minutes.

[@bitnewt]

The body horror of rapid aging could have been so good if they set out proper rules - "they age this much in this much time, their survival needs and bodily processes are not affected because of X, their mental development works like Y"

[@rouaneb6664]

or if they hadn't tried to explain any of it but had consistency in the implied rules (see: the baby's death). from what ive heard of the comic, that's the route the author took

[@gwendolynrobinson3900]

They try to figure it out in the movie, but they're just tourists dropped on a beach that have no idea what's going on and are just figuring out everything through trial and error and observation. So while it's upsetting that not everything is explained, in real life it's hard for someone to decide the rules for how a mythical beach works when they have less than 24 hours and are dropping dead in the process

[@Monkeysinger24]

The main problem that I had with the trailer was that they were like “all these bad things are happening! We need to figure out what’s happening!” When I was just like “WHY DONT YOU JUST LEAVE THE BEACH?!?”

[@luiginastro8831]

Let's all leave the beach, beach Ninki Minjaj

[@EijiDoesThings]

if they try, they’ll black out and end up back where they started

[@maria-zm4bo]

@@EijiDoesThings they themselves said they could just go slowly through the passage. like bruh

[@Jnxd184]

Seriously, no one in the whole production of this movie thought that the child sex + pregnancy horror wasn't really a good idea?

[@peprigo9259]

Right…like no one thought to say, “Uh…something isn’t right here, Mr.”

[@Cinnaschticks]

I'M SORRY?!

[@ペリーロバート]

This movie should have been a fantasy rather than sci-fi. The fact that they age throughout the film based on science means that they would need to constantly eat, shit, piss, at least this is my understanding of biology. cells constantly die like all the time, I could be wrong but I don't think the movies logic holds up. Plus if the beach was magic it could explain the maturity of the children as well, maybe they just go through mental stages magically. Also I get that some food has high preservatives but wouldn't it just rot super fast due to time being so fast. I get that its not loving but we seen dead tissue rot away insanely fast?

[@emmasweet6956]

Also how they said there hair and nails didn’t grow cuz it was dead cells but the dead body still rotted even tho that was dead cells too

[@devonmunn5728]

Yeah in the graphic novel there's only extremely vague hints at what the explanation could be

[@liv3835]

wouldn't swimming underwater be impossible on the island too? because every second is equivalent to a couple hours, so anyone who tried to swim underwater would immediately run out of oxygen and die

[@Ӝ̵̨̄-з6м]

I didn't actually watch the movie but from the trailers, the part where the 6 year old girl gives birth seems so disturbing like there's something about that that really put me off watching the movie

[@P.cookie]

Yeah... it just kinda feels sus. Why did you choose the 4 year old of all people especially when the boy was behaving like an adult when she doesn't??

[@trinaq]

That's true, the teenage versions of the kids didn't really act like the actual children. Plus, it seems unrealistic that a six year old would even know what a mortgage was.

[@IHate4Kids]

I know horror movies are suppose to give you uneasy feelings, but that scene felt less like "existential dread" and more like "Oh wow Shyamalan just put someone's deviantart fetish on the big screen for everyone to see huh"

[@MsRabblerouser]

Yeah... I'm picking up really sketch vibes

[@edgarstarling3363]

That plotline was basically just "how can we sexualize children without *really* sexualizing children?"

[@sadcap]

Based on everything I've heard about the comic, Shymalan sounds like the WORST director to adapt it. He can't help himself from overexplaining things and ruining the mystery that makes them compelling. The second you insist there's an explanation, all the plot holes show up. Annoying, because it sounds like this could have been great if given some A24 style pacing and artistic styling, or the Alex Garland Annihilation treatment.

[@Jarblyy]

An Alex Garland adaption would’ve been incredible.

[@parkchimmin7913]

Have we learned NOTHING from his adaptation of Avatar the Last Airbender?

[@ggundercover3681]

@@parkchimmin7913 what adaptation? you must've had a fever dream. something like that does *not* exist.

[@parkchimmin7913]

@@ggundercover3681 Ah yes. There is no ATLA live action adaptation in Ba Sing Se.

[@47ratsinahoodie]

I kinda wanna see what this movie would have been like if someone like Jordan Peele adapted it (idk I don't know that many horror directors 😅)

[@tysondennis1016]

“I for one is shocked.” Avatar fans: First time?

[@luciendelaney8975]

That was M.Night? Huh. I never knew lol

[@lux7264]

@@luciendelaney8975 yeah he sucks

[@luiginastro8831]

Uhm... The Happening, anyone?

[@lux7264]

@@luiginastro8831 no

[@gruzinkerbelleabethabelle7996]

So let’s say that these people were running/swimming/sitting for a while on the beach…would that mean that the people who were doing physical activity would suddenly become super buff and/or incredibly exhausted from moving so much over the course of days or even years? And if they were sitting a lot, what would stop them from becoming incredibly obese, because again, a little bit of time could actually be years and years for them. And wouldn’t they have to be eating, like, a lot?

[@batsnghostz]

I think if people stopped moving it would be more like bone atrophy? Like astronauts. Im not saying they wouldn’t get fatter. Just a thought :)

[@ggundercover3681]

@@batsnghostz but if they aren't eating, they would starve and get thin no? I don't see them gaining weight at all with the ageing process

[@batsnghostz]

@@ggundercover3681 the baby didnt starve, and the food DID rot. It seems the baby died of exposure to the elements rather than starvation. For some reason, starvation isn’t a danger on the beach

[@clownrat5759]

@@batsnghostz the baby died of neglect, not “exposure to the elements”

[@batsnghostz]

@@clownrat5759 well no one died from not eating, so?

[@bernardinogaitan]

When are people going to finally admit Shyamalan is not a good director. He’s a one hit wonder

[@Ektalon]

By this point, who the hell thinks he’s a good director?

[@scarletsage6267]

@@Ektalon after what he did to Avatar the last air bender its hard to think he's good

[@isabellaearnhardt6380]

@@scarletsage6267 At least with these movies it's all his vision not the studio's

[@milesisediting]

Wouldnt say "one" hit. I love Sixth Sense, Signs and Unbreakable. But that's about it lol

[@thepinkestpigglet7529]

Everyone has admitted tha5

[@MadameCirce]

Not making a comparison to justify anything at all, but just letting anyone curious know that the graphic novel is NOTHING like the movie. Shyamalan basically took the concept of a bunch of families trapped on a beach that makes you old and wrote a completely new story around it. I'm not talking slightly different, I mean drastically different in storyline, tone, etc. So the two should be judged separately even more than usual.

[@sarahconnors8909]

this whole thing reminds me of a 13 year old’s creative writing project. like when you’re 13 and Dark and Edgy™️

[@hopsymopsy8352]

I would say a 13 year old writing this would be impressive because overall the story and concept is interesting, but this would have to be the first rendition, not the final project

[@HoldmyApplejuice]

i wrote sonic fanfic lmao

[@user7061]

now that's an insult to 13 year olds. i've read/seen better fan stories on deviantart than this incredibly bad movie "offers".

[@kellylockwood8287]

Hey. They have wattpad for that.

[@dawnredwood4786]

You can’t trade mark dark and edgy it’s the name of my, a 14 year olds creative writing project

[@animeaftermidnight2765]

When you asked "can you even get pregnant if you're rapidly having your period", I think that was the moment the whole "men writing women" thing sunk in. They don't even consider our periods, just the "weight of our breasts" or "slender frame". jeeez

[@rheenusthebeanus]

Eh I think it was more of a "I'm a director and I want THIS to happen" case than anything. Plus if they adhered to reality 100% and took no creative liberties, I think we can all agree it would be a MUCH grosser and graphic movie.

[@animeaftermidnight2765]

@@rheenusthebeanus Honestly the concept, if executed correctly, would have/should have been a much grosser and graphic movie. "i'm the director and I want to see a child get pregnant and give birth" Somehow makes it even worse.

[@lunacarolyn]

This!

[@rheenusthebeanus]

@@animeaftermidnight2765 no I 100% agree with you, it's weird af and I hate it. But other things such as thd insane growth of facial or just hair in general, growth of nails, the need to excrete waste etc etc were also not shown. Fiction movie is indeed, fiction.

[@carolinewheeler77]

“Guys I need the four year old girl to give birth it’s my Vision” - M pedo night

[@samfitz5416]

Didn't M. Night direct and produce the "Avatar: The Last Airbender" movie back in 2010? Seems like when he drops the ball, he drops it hard.

[@choreomaniac]

The movie is a metaphor for itself. It’s so meta. Don’t waste time is the theme and the moral and a warning about this film. You will rapidly age while watching this film and 4 years will pass while inside the theater.

[@dontrah1838]

Seriously hope this movie wasn't in theater

[@kittylilly1410]

Oh GOD the bit that I found the funniest is when the mother is like “listen to me. I work at a MUSEUM. I am saying this so you take me SERIOUSLY. there is something wrong with my KIDS” and the schizophrenia bit was so offensive lol he absolutely had dementia for the entire film

[@luvshiei]

I laughed hysterically in the theater when she said that!

[@mirroredheart7292]

Omgee ikr I was so confused with what they were tryna do there

[@Mels0103]

What??? 😭

[@Monochrome2004]

like wtf does a museum have to do with anything? actually can anything even work in this context?

[@akr.medley4965]

Yeah. In the comic he doesn’t have schizophrenia. It’s dementia. Idk why movies demonize people with schizophrenia this much. It’s sad

[@doodlebug7]

Ok but if the baby died from being left alone for like 5 seconds, wouldn't everyone else have also died unless they were constantly eating and drinking?

[@nickjoy6389]

The tumor was the worst part because if you had a wound open for days YOU WOULD DIE! 😭FROM BLOOD LOSS OR INFECTION! ESPECIALLY WITH BARE UNWASHED HANDS AND AN UNSANITARY KNIFE! THESE THINGS WOULDNT BE SO NOTICEABLE IF THE PLOT WAS TIGHTER

[@JohnJacobJingleheimerSchmidt7]

You’re telling me that somebody watched the Avatar: The Last Airbender film and STILL gave Shyamalan a popular heavily metaphorical comic to adapt????

[@justyouraveragemartian783]

SHYAMALAN DIRECTED THAT?? yeah not really surprising

[@mantis7331]

I lost it when the woman immediately yelled “the baby died of neglect” lmao some of the worst dialogue I’ve ever heard

[@godminnette2]

I still don't understand how food and water works. Wouldn't they die of starvation or dehydration within hours unless they are *constantly* drinking or eating? Their bodies need energy to heal those wounds so quickly and whatnot. They'd also have to excrete all of the waste from that food...

[@tyf.5111]

There was some kind of excuse in the film somewhere that only bodies rapidly changing mass would actually need to eat (e.g. the children). This was only minorly depicted by Kara grabbing handfuls of pasta while the adults didn't need it as they had finished growing. That was the explanation for why the baby died instantly. In the comic, the baby doesn't die. So I'm guessing the beach just makes it so the people don't have to eat or drink water.

[@charlene9489]

I thought that you didn't need to eat, but if you did, you'd grow faster. That's why the youngest children out-aged his sister. I'm not sure how it explains why they kept saying they were hungry though, but it seemed like only Cara was saying that after a while. I'm not sure. It's a plot hole.

[@VagabondPink]

That sounds horrific, constantly eating and drinking and having it be waste. Like it's just going through a pipe.

[@melanino]

My problem with M. Shamylan is that, as much you can give him grief about his movies (and they are warranted) it saddens me because he has amazing concepts, like all of his movies have such cool ideas that could be explored or genuine plots that could be used for metaphors about society... But it needs to be put in a more competent director's/writers hands.

[@glocrowhurst]

Yeah, I totally agree. Every time I watch one of his stinkers I still see glimpses of brilliance in it. He needs to tone his ego down and accept working with a partner (or two). Someone who could clean up his dialogue and weave his concepts into plots that make sense to humans would do him a LOT of good. I wonder if he had that kind of help in his earlier movies?

[@dandansoysauce8762]

Yeah for sure. Like I saw the trailer for this movie and thought "Old, huh? Got an interesting concept, maybe I'll see it". And it's disappointing to hear that it apparently wasn't good

[@lpk4396]

yeah i agree. innovative ideas but poor executions.

[@caarline654]

This concept is literally from a comic. He didn't come up with it. It's an adaptation (yes I know he has other good films)

[@khmerchef]

I read somewhere that his writing team changed somewhere around the 4th or 5th movie. I don't remember any sources, it was a post/thread I stumbled a long time ago so I don't even know if it was credible. I enjoyed Split, and the teaser for Old looked promising. What a shame.

[@MoyosoreOgunbiyi]

Shalmayan's deliberate use of stilted, tone deaf, off putting dialogue in his films never fails to annoy. It's as if they were given the scripts to read up just before the Director yells "ACTION!". 🤦

[@anib8863]

"What? Nooo."

[@jackiep594]

@@anib8863 goddamn it that’s exactly what I was gonna say xD

[@JulianGreystoke]

I'm convinced shyamalan has never heard a human speak.

[@Ektalon]

Oh, he has, he just doesn’t listen.

[@TheReZisTLust]

He's a celebrity of course they are only followed by robots

[@petewhite3844]

Reality: "M Night, your movie has all these problems, like what about this continuity error, and the test audience really didn't like this twist..." What he hears: "you are a visionary. You are the best director of all time and people love your movies. Everyone on set desires you carnally and we wish we had your insight and creativity."

[@slushpuppie19]

What's your name and occupation??

[@JohnJacobJingleheimerSchmidt7]

Actually now that you mention it…Shyamalan’s cameo was a perfect metaphor for his directing: irresponsibly drop the characters off at a beach with no guidance or context, knowing the whole thing would crash and burn by the end of it

[@SamuelSamuelSamuel1]

People IRL with schizophrenia: I forgot to take my meds today 😅, I’m feeling really sad… :/ Schizophrenics in movies: I SEE SOUNDS AND EAT COLORS!!!

[@valtheemokid4005]

How exactly does it work because movies just say you just see people

[@SamuelSamuelSamuel1]

@@valtheemokid4005 most people with schizophrenia don’t even see people. 65% of people with it have only ever had auditory hallucinations… like screams and whatever. Nothing to strange lol… 32% of people said that schizophrenia can sometimes mess things up, like maybe you say excuse me, to a stranger that isn’t there… And for a small 3% schizophrenia can ruin their lives :/… Hallucinations of demons, brains making plot lines, multiple personalities, BPD… It’s so sad whenever I see a person who’s apart of the 3%… most of the time they have their good days 😢, and bad days…

[@valtheemokid4005]

@@SamuelSamuelSamuel1 the 3% sounds like hell now I feel bad

[@stephaniewilliams6756]

Archaic 1980s ass ableism, like dude find a new scapegoat. Like online radicalism, the guy was already racist

[@svgstarlight]

the movie was just a whole lot of “oh no that person just aged 2 years” “oh no this kid is now a teenager” “oh no this guy aged so fast that he has schizophrenia” with like the last two seconds being of their actual escape… i understand the message but to me, it was super boring. i’m free to open my mind though so if you have a different opinion feel free to share, maybe i missed an important point in the movie

[@kaylieleite6852]

I agree. This is one of those movies that hopes you won’t think about the rules set up earlier, and will instead be distracted by all the weird/messed up things and stay caught up in it throughout. I think it would have been better if things were more mysterious and we weren’t given rules to follow, so that we as an audience don’t question the logistics as much. I don’t think that would have solved everything with this movie, but still.

[@Mylittlestcorner]

I personally find the concepts unsettling/creepy. Having felt like I lost middle school and high school years to trauma and mental illness - losing time so quickly can be an interestingly effed up idea. Buuuut this movie overall wasn't done right. Lot of potential, and all of which was lost in translation. But that's just my thoughts 😜

[@akr.medley4965]

check the comic! It’s much better than the movie.

[@luiginastro8831]

Nah, you're pretty much on point. M. Night failed to convey the themes of the original graphic novel and wanted to please his artistic ego, which is what he almost always does, especially in the later years of his career. I disagree that it's boring, though. I had a blast laughing at it for its stupidity, cringy dialgoue and unintentionally funny visuals.

[@backwardslatin4842]

The real plot twist was Shyamalan convincing people he was ever a good director.

[@Ryder8u]

scariest part of the movie was when his name popped up

[@jonathanbowers8964]

Yeah. He is practically the Nicholas Cage of directors at this point.

[@trinaq]

True, Sixth Sense was wonderful, though every movie from The Happening onwards has been Meh at best.

[@bangitybangbabang]

@@jonathanbowers8964 I keep saying this! Both if then just fling shit at the wall and occasionally some of it sticks , leading people to think they're talented geniuses. They're not, they're just chaotic.

[@erin8765]

@@jonathanbowers8964 This is an insult to Nichola Cage. He's a god damn national treasure (pun intended)

[@ninadoesstuff7884]

I, regrettably, did the maths: 1 day = 5 seconds (rounded up for convenience). So 1 month(ish) should be about 150 seconds, or 2 minutes and 30 seconds. Which means the entire pregnancy developed in about 22 minutes and 30 seconds. WHICH MEANS, for every 2 minutes and 30 seconds that pass, you would be bleeding for about 25 to 30 seconds. Still, gross af. Thank you.

[@UncleMikeDrop]

If direct knowledge of the source material is required to understand a movie adaptation, it should be seen as a failure on the part of those who made the adapted movie.

[@chickpea]

Yeah that's why the Scott Pilgrim movie is so great, the story is changed enough that the movie is satisfactory by itself but if you want to see a different ending and know more details you have the comics

[@memali2939]

That's why the 'Outsiders' movie is so bad, it makes no sense without the book

[@jtlovescodelyoko]

This is based off a graphic novel, so he's pulling "The Last Airbender" again. Well gonna buy that graphic novel which the Kindle version is $10, I will support that over Watching this movie.

[@alisaurus4224]

For both this and Avatar, he said he wanted to make movies about them because his kids liked them. His kids need to stop showing him what media they’re interested in

[@MimisRoom1117]

Same it’s so much better than this bs

[@Kizzabell]

Is it good? The premise of aging a year every half hour sounds cool. I've never read a graphic novel though (unless you count Archie comics as kid 😆)

[@leannehaligh]

@@Kizzabell haven't watched the film, but the graphic novel gave me really odd vibes about the author. the only thing he seemed interested in was children with adult bodies but VERY childlike minds having seks. apart from that, it is a pretty well written comic.

[@bochalet]

I had forgotten about Last air bender.. damn it

[@Adrifer42]

The thing is, the overview of the story, “a beach that claims people’s years” sounds quite good and I really want to read the comic now. The movie could’ve had potential

[@AlecDouglas]

Also the decomposition of the woman’s body doesn’t really make sense because if their hair and nails didn’t grow because the cells were dead then wouldn’t she no longer be affected if all the cells in her body were dead? And even if they weren’t, decomposition relies more on exterior factors such as any bacteria that’s introduced or other natural factors than it does on the organism itself

[@gwendolynrobinson3900]

Also, the silverware on the beach rusted super fast for whatever reason, but the food managed to not spoil the entire time? They picked and chose a lot of things to explain and things to shrug off

[@chideraalexanderdex547]

@@gwendolynrobinson3900 Yeah it was lazy

[@bigbigbigbigbigman]

It's funny that early in his career Shayamalan was "the next Spielberg" but in actuality his legacy is just mediocre movie after mediocre movie and you just know how badly that grates on him cause he cannot keep his ego out of everything he says and does.

[@belot217]

Orson Welles was on a completely different level of talent, but he suffered from similar crushing expectations throughout his life..

[@jonathanbowers8964]

He is basically the Nicholas Cage of directors

[@rgs8970]

Why does he keep getting more chances, though? It's frustrating to see how many people have had careers cut short before they even really started, and yet Shyamalan gets shot after shot. Must be nice 🤷

[@andaisshadows5285]

@@rgs8970 He self-finances his movies now.

[@Starburst514]

And every now and then he makes a legit good one, but not often enough to justify all the chances he's getting Like it's not every other movie, its 1 movie after a million crappiles

[@abit359]

Wait, if she should be having her period and contractions constantly while being pregnant, what about the younger girl and periods? Why didn't the movie address that like this little girl would be finding herself in a lot of pain and constantly bleeding while having no idea why? I feel like that's kind of important. Along with that, why aren't they constantly eating and drinking? If they're aging constantly, it'd probably require constant energy which would have to come from somewhere. Also, wouldn't being stabbed deeply just cause you to immediately die from bleeding out? I don't see why it would just heal and not even get infected because the wound was never cleaned.

[@cafangytang1700]

i just realized without context this sounds like someone rapidly retelling a fever dream

[@alienbacon656]

If I had to make this movie. I would make it more chaotic: make it not time acceleration, but time dilation. Time is not going linear but it’s a warping and bubbling, like a glitch in a simulation. The kids are getting older, the adults younger, then suddenly they develop new stages in human evolution or regress back to cavemen. Have fun with the concept. Make the drinks more interesting too, the woman with calcium deficiency gets a dose that’s too strong and her bones are regenerating at a way too efficient rate, turning her into a monstrous figure of bone protrusions or something

[@zizzymarideth2575]

now that would be a good movie

[@thomasleitstein2181]

Omg that's so interesting and much better- one small adjustment tho instead of just the adults getting younger and the kids getting older it varies from character to character some of them are getting younger and some are getting older some are doing both and some theres seemingly nothing happening to them itd be much more terrifying to the few who nothings happening too since you have no idea how it works

[@Quackervoltz]

Damn now I wanna make that movie

[@shadow_shine3578]

Now THAT! Is a horror movie.

[@KrysPGator]

youre far too powerful to be kept alive

[@milesisediting]

I hate how ableist Shyamalan is. He always portrays mental illness as scary, dangerous and evil

[@sarahconnors8909]

fr

[@slushpuppie19]

Yeah that was a bummer tbh

[@MyYoutubeChannelBabyyyy]

I think the baby dying in 5 seconds hurt the movie a lot. It made a lot more questions pop up, and it would have been interesting to see the baby grow up and be a new character. And it didn’t really make sense that it died that fast.

[@mh7233]

I agree with everything in this video except for calling it “the worst movie of 2021” when “Music” came out in February.

[@HannahTuttle]

LMAOOOO

[@sophierenatajubilee8521]

FACTS

[@Private-Potato]

Your right @MH

[@Chichi0013]

Poor Aaron burr

[@playdoh658]

exactly 😭

[@nelle1899]

the rapper that kept saying “damn” whenever something happened absolutely KILLED ME

[@becauseican4653]

It should’ve ended with the kids making a sand castle and then dying holding hands or something. It should also have a scene near the beginning where the kids make a sand castle. Then it could be a call back to when they were kids and happy, and to the comic.

[@arodriqs]

The women in this movie would be having a period every 2.5 minutes. I have no idea how ovulation and periods work but i dont think the girl wouldve had a chance to get pregnant

[@awwcrickets7957]

Hell, erections wouldn’t even work. If a few seconds equals a day, an erection would technically last days. That can cause damage to blood vessels and become extremely painful

[@_b.4596]

Even without knowing how it works you're right 😓 An egg only lasts around 24 hours before dies. The sperm would've needed to reach there in like a millisecond, and that's without it dying on the way to the egg.

[@thatfunnycripple]

This horror film could have been really great! The concept is really cool and if it had been directed by someone other than Shyamalan I could see it having great subtle horror vibes similar to maybe Bly Manor, but no. Sad that they missed an opportunity, the comic was great. Great video as always! Thanks, Amanda!!

[@trinaq]

Agreed, it shouldn't have been Shyamalan's project, it might have been better in another director's hands.

[@heath6802]

The concept of getting old is scary to a lot of people and it’s a breath of fresh air from other horror movie concepts... What a shame it was a flop

[@joaopedrochicre4809]

I think it tried to explain to much for it's own good, it would more sense to make something more philosophical, the comic went for something like that, and can be taken much more serious for it

[@Mel-xk9hf]

I think this movie was adapted by a comic! I don't remember what the comic was called but it might be a good read if this is something you're looking for

[@viscountrainbows6452]

Yeah the concept alone, like many others in shite movies (recent example being Chaos Walking) are just so clumsily handled that it's not just a tragedy people wasted time and money on the movie, but that it has a chilling effect on anyone who may have a better fleshed-out version in the works or at least as an idea. I feel like the main gripe is that the characters are rapidly aging, but are assumed to have the same Experience that people who normally age would because... reasons. But if there were any thought put into it, we'd have a story of awkward fumbling Long Children essentially never discovering adulthood, which could itself be a psychological trip into the horror of being trapped in a body you are not equipped for, with a frantically running clock for added pressure. Though this sounds as written like a clumsy "hur dur what if, rapid aging but also a technical 6 year old knows what sex is" Like first of all, yuck. Secondly, way to go with the first draft. M. Night truly never has to work another day in his life because he made a handful of good movies over a decade ago. What a drag.

[@averyeml]

This movie weirds me out because when people initially started talking about it I thought Mid-Sized Sedan was a joke name, then I found out it was real. I then assumed that it was some attempt of making a precocious child, like maybe one of the kids is into cars and notices him getting out of a Mid-Sized Sedan, so they call him that until they find out his name. Nope.

[@briixcks]

pls explain why they call him that like i’m so confused

[@averyeml]

@@briixcks haven’t seen the movie but the other videos I’ve watched have explained that that’s literally his rapper name, in the same way that Eminem is Marshall Mathers’s rapper name or how Lil Nas X is Montero Hill’s rapper name. Like imagine people going “hell yeah, Mid Sized Sedan’s newest album just dropped and it’s 🔥”

[@TheTheatrechick94]

If Ari Aster had written and directed Old it would have been a masterpiece

[@h0undiie]

Ari Aster is just. such a promising director. He does artsy horror films the way Shymalan tries to do.

[@lizzietaylorsversion5941]

Ikr, the plot would be interesting if it was portrayed right, but the way it was just made it terrible, but the way they did was “not all that” and the comic wasn’t any better

[@itsaballoonparty]

Is the name “midsize sedan” played as a joke?? Or are we as an audience supposed to take that at face value because oh my god

[@P.cookie]

It does lowkey sound like a joke rapper's name

[@Maximusringrock]

it's so obviously a joke

[@maddiedoesntkno]

Yes. The greatest rappers of our time. Biggie, Pac, and Kia Sportage

[@spiderbug7615]

@@maddiedoesntkno 🤣

[@paperigangsta]

ngl it's one of the best rapper names ive heard can't get it out of my mind

[@r.t.7288]

It's a shame that this was so bad. The concept of rapid aging like that seemed genuinely terrifying

[@lucasite]

Disclaimer for anyone whose interested in the comic now, if you're uncomfortable with the themes in relation to the child characters, DO NOT read it. It goes much further into that aspect and I personally got very uncomfortable reading it.

[@BonJoviBeatlesLedZep]

I would go so far as to say it completely ruins the comic, which is otherwise really really good.

[@Limbolots0]

I don't really wanna read the comic but can you explain it? I have morbid curiosity.

[@poisonmantis4191]

@@BonJoviBeatlesLedZep i don't think a thing making you uncomfortable ruins things, especially given that seems to be kinda a theme of the comic. it's meant to be freaky and uncomfortable, so it did its job right. it's meant to be horrifying

[@BonJoviBeatlesLedZep]

@@poisonmantis4191 I get you, but it is just alienating and gross. It takes away from the emotional impact.

[@poisonmantis4191]

@@BonJoviBeatlesLedZep again, that's the point. it's not meant to be a story you're like "wow i loved reading that" it's a story that's meant to mess you up

[@palyername]

re: pregnancy horror and the concept of the women bleeding out from rapid menstrual cycles where tf is the horror centered around male anatomy? like why is it women's bodies that are used for horror (and anatomically incorrectly at that)? idk man it bothers me

[@MadeOfConfusion]

I think because the base concept of periodic week long bleeding, the way pregnancy and birth actually functions, and the ties it has had all thru humanity symbolically- to lots of religions and mythological stories etc. All make it more prone to horror movie exploitation when someone's looking for a creative device. Not saying it's just chill and fun to have only women's bodies w/ the horror, but more of a why it happens.

[@mm-xk2zl]

for the sake of oblivious old men with tingles in their pants

[@zealot246]

what horror would you give us? not being able to hold an erection after we age?

[@artofjmill]

My son (he's 15 so be nice if the math is off. I'm a math dumb dumb) did the math lol. He estimated bleeding would last 34.5 seconds and a total cycle time of 138 seconds. That means you would have a whopping 130.5 seconds between periods. I would hate that life. Here's the math: Speed of time = 365•48 = 17520 times normal time Seconds in a week = (7•24)(60•60) = 604800 seconds Island Week = 604800/17520 = 34.5 seconds Island Period Cycle = 34.5•4 = 138 seconds

[@lamiascrimes7132]

I'd guess it's because horror is usually based on real fears and phobias and phobia of pregnancy is a real thing some women (including myself) have. Now there has to be horror based on male anatomy, but nothing that wouldn't have to be about male genitalia, thus not suitable for most ratings. I hope I made sense

[@Awkwardrains]

Dude I was turned away from the trailer just at the pregnancy scene. That is a literal child. Idc if she aged up in seconds, it felt wrong and didn't help how panicked she was. At the time I wasn't sure if the kids aged up mentally or not so that scene alone made me go "nope. So much nope-"

[@cricketh_8273]

Fr that made me so uncomfortable, like why? Just why?

[@Awkwardrains]

@@cricketh_8273 ikr- morals just shot out of the window with that pft

[@applesnappleXD]

If you honestly don’t think M.Night is a bad director and makes bad movies then you never watched his movie Avatar The last Airbender because he was Unironically proud of that one and it was awful

[@yourresidentanon4169]

Ok that explains a lot. I had no idea he directed that

[@applesnappleXD]

@@yourresidentanon4169 yeah he made that movie because his daughter was a huge fan and coincidentally she was also the one who inspired him to make Old and she even helped him with the movie. It’s just a theory but I think his daughter is the leading cause of his shitty films lol

[@yourresidentanon4169]

@@applesnappleXD if she isn’t, she must be VERY disappointed.

[@Cinnaschticks]

@@applesnappleXD OOF.

[@adarateranroldan]

💀

[@lisamcdonald2877]

The film may well suck, but the concept of aging at lightspeed is truly terrifying. Of course I am not young, so it is more real to me.

[@bradhirsch4845]

I agree. It is terrifying and the MAGA couple....the wealthy, racist , insane man and his vain wife....they were also scary and they exist in real life!!! That makes it most scary.

[@fuckwit107]

If you haven't you should read the original comic, spooky stuff.

[@duckinaswing]

you kno this was written by a man bc anyone who menstruates wouldve taken this moment to demonstrate how scary puberty is to go thru without the proper education. but mnight missed opportunity never misses.

[@EmzeeLynn]

“Coral is not something that you want to f✨ck with in the ocean.” Thanks for that. Also, I’m right there with you on the childhood pregnancy thing. That scene from the trailer actually made me change my mind about going to see it. Initially I thought the movie looked good but then I had to remind myself that M Night continuously does this to people so..

[@ronaldowens5025]

Fire Coral is a nightmare. I still have and will always have deep red scars from stong current and a scuba diving incident.

[@chanyeolsass5201]

@@ronaldowens5025 Scuba diving has always seemed so fun and interesting to me. Too bad my family has a bad history with Sting Rays. Otherwise I would seek the activity out a bit more

[@agoofygoober7649]

Same, I thought about watching it but something about the pregnancy made me reconsider. I guess as a young teen I find it disturbing, idk but I’m definitely not watching it 💀

[@ladynoluck]

The creepy kids thing is made even worse by the fact that no child I know just fully figured out what sex was/how it worked with two people on their own. I’m so uncomfortable and pissed that this even has to be discussed though 😬😬😬

[@brothebys]

i guess you can justify it with instinct, like animals arent given sex talk but they still know how to mate, but the concept is flawed like theyd have to be eating every second of the movie or theyd be malnourished.

[@SjofnBM1989]

How do you think primitive man figured out how to have sex? No one was around to give them the talk they just figured it out.

[@MaestroAlvis]

I feel like people would figure it out

[@ladynoluck]

@@SjofnBM1989 But were they a 4 yo and 6 yo with only like an hour or so of time or less? Please consider what my main point actually was without the over-extrapolating.

[@ladynoluck]

@@MaestroAlvis people sure, but a 4 yo and 6 yo with less than an hour or so? (Edit for typos)

[@rebby1313]

"M. Night Shyamalan made a bad movie." Hmm yes.. The floor here is made out of floor.

[@natalyn139]

the whole thing about them just ignoring that periods exist is just like… tell me your movie was written by a cis man without telling me your movie was written by a cis man edit: since a couple of people have apparently totally missed the point of this and think i’m saying that all cis men are dumb or something, i’m just gonna go ahead and explain the joke. the point i was making is that it was obviously written by a cis man because a person who menstruates would probably have considered that detail. at no point did i say or even imply that a cis man COULDN’T write a movie that demonstrates an understanding of how periods work. it’s an “all squares are rectangles but not all rectangles are squares” sort of thing. the joke isn’t that every cis man is ignorant about periods, but rather that a movie that completely overlooks them like this one did is likely to be written by a cis man. this is why reading comprehension is important, folks.

[@liseranthistle7917]

Nah I was fully expecting there to be a scene where one of the girls suddenly has a pool of blood under her and we have to deal with a cis man explaining periods in a weird purity way. But when that didn't happen I was relieved because I'm tired of cis men explaining periods. Then the pregnancy scene happened and now I WISH the period thing happened instead of the pregnancy scene it was so gross and weird.

[@juliablubb2796]

Consider how long periods last and how long the baby was alive. Getting a period would be an unnoticeable drop of blood.

[@everett791]

@@juliablubb2796 it would still be the same amount but it Would come out quicker

[@crowMilatonin]

Cis men don’t write periods because they have no clue how they work lol

[@ironkight3648]

@@crowMilatonin dude obviously some cis men will know how periods work. Its just basic grammar?