John Kearns' Best Bits | Taskmaster

[@indoorkites420]

should make a compilation of alex accidentally laughing at the contestants during tasks

[@GettyBB]

Yes! I often look for this - surprised it hasn’t been done so far…

[@CueyTKD]

It could be Alex's best reactions to a task. His sly comments/covert pointing out of what should be done instead/shakes of the head are fantasticly timed.

[@BrunoHenrique-bg8kj]

Alex reactions plz

[@stevo68]

I like when he shows his frustration with the contestants.

[@slashbat2375]

I would love one where Alex gets upset lmao. It's always genuinely surprising when he's visibly annoyed

[@laggy3099]

I've said it before on the actual episode, but giving John Kearns- One of the most anxious men I have ever seen in my life- the task of "secretly sabotage your team" is the most brilliant evil shit I've ever seen in my life

[@wilbo_baggins]

That's cause the really anxious people don't like being seen.

[@kisbie]

I’m convinced Kearns thought he had to sabotage EVERY team task. Either that or the secret task Alex gave him was redundant. 😁

[@Tao_Tology]

Plus it has the dual effects of 'he's getting flack for being useless, that's harsh' AND 'he's, now, getting entirely justified flack for working against his team to win 5 points'.

[@lfcwilli]

Judging by his stand up he doesn’t seem anxious

[@Labergemusic]

It's likely the most diabolical thing outside of when they got that guy to text Greg cheeky messages for 3 months straight

[@Roysorb]

I love this season because it's like Dara was falsely sent to an insane asylum.

[@henrietta9206]

🤣👏🏻agree

[@jbsgroup96]

Every time I see John Kearns in a task I'm reminded of a comment I saw under one of the season 14 episodes that says "the longer the series goes on, the more I'm convinced that four contestants were contacted through their agents and John was kidnapped from his home"

[@benign_canine3423]

I never thought it was possible for a real life person to be a real-life version of Winnie the Pooh, but every time I see John Kearns all I can think is he's 1 misshap away from saying "Oh bother"

[@Merip1214]

You know, I could never put my finger on what it was about him, but you're exactly right hahah

[@Drop-Dead-Fred-Did-It]

Even more accurate when you hear him mumble oh dear in the caravan 😂

[@themug406]

Weird conviction that

[@_kontingency]

HE IS EXACTLY POOH 😂

[@FanFicnic]

Omg you are dead on. That’s so funny.

[@rebeccatanner1794]

John Kearns seems like a confused accountant who ended up on the show by accident and has no idea why he's there or what is happening. One of my favourite contestants they've had on

[@thamiris.]

"there might be a twist, i haven't read it" an actual perfect comeback 👌👌

[@finsterslight9068]

It’s criminal that his dad’s hands did not make an appearance. My go to John moment.

[@jackwang9536]

There's enough for 2 videos! 1) Dad's hands 2) Grape in a can of chickpeas 3) Toilet paper airplane 4) Face full of flour 5) Feather Loss-Gate, grab some chickens 6) One-Minute plays... too Southern

[@alcachofa03]

"Is that him on the crucifix?"

[@themug406]

​@@jackwang9536Did you not understand what op said?

[@jackwang9536]

​@@themug406I supported the OP, "Dad's hands" was not in this compilation vid. There were so many excellent John bits, and that's why I suggested a 2nd vid with all of those bits

[@russelljackson2818]

John and Fern were polar opposites in this series. She seems lost in a reverie of innocence and wonder, getting distracted by flies and meeting potatoes, and John is locked in an eternal struggle to stave off an existential nervous breakdown.

[@ghoullio-jr]

i couldnt possibly fully explain why, but the way he goes "oh!" when greg says he doesnt own any fridge magnets KILLS me

[@themug406]

Well rip, you wont be missed

[@thamiris.]

it's SO good

[@jamesblackwell722]

John is probably my favourite contestant out of all the seasons. He was so unpredictable, he was never going to win, but he was very entertaining.

[@andreaskarlsson5251]

Sam and Lucy are pretty brilliant in the latest seriest too

[@laluneodyssee4404]

"Know what you want, and have the confidence to go after it" - John Kearns

[@Tao_Tology]

"vvVEEEEEEEEEeeeeeee" - John Kearns

[@nedcurfman3486]

“Uh?” - John Kearns

[@PoBros.]

7:50 John sabotaging Fern and Dara is one of my all-time favourite Taskmaster moments It was so funny when Fern called John "dafty in the middle" 😂

[@smokerjim]

Nah, it has got to be "What aircraft.... crashes more (cue exasperation from Dara).... into mountains (cue paroxysms of laughter and incredulity from Dara and Fern)"

[@jackwang9536]

And Fern has John saved in her phone as John "Traitor" Kearns. Legend!

[@timothycahalan1540]

It's funny watching Dara and Fern get so exaggerated by John in the sabotage task

[@timothycahalan1540]

​@@jackwang9536when did she reveal that

[@jackwang9536]

@@timothycahalan1540 It was on the Taskmaster podcast. There's so many funny insights on Series 14. Fern actually had to explain John's behavior on the sabotage task to Dara as "new parent brain" because he & his wife just had a baby.

[@Sunprism]

Next time you rewatch the series, watch his jacket. In the first task of picking things to use later, he tries to hang it up on the door hook, and it immediately falls to the ground. The rest of the series, he walks to the task and throws his jacket across the room

[@Harvey1211]

I haven’t even started watching yet but I’m noticing… 32 minutes! Even the creators of the video struggled to pick ‘Best Bits’ for John Kearns because there is just so much he did in Series 14. Alex has actually said that filming the sabotage team task is his favourite task EVER in the recent ‘Ask Me Anything’ on Reddit.

[@MrsAjergirl]

My favourite Taskmaster moment is here “Veeeeeee!!!” - John Kearnes, flawlessly imitating a wolf

[@DasGanon]

I think I like the Crocodile moment a little bit more as he changes the tone of "Beeeee" as he gets more and more exasperated as Dara and Fern say no guesses with befuddled looks on their faces.

[@JacktheRah]

I love how they decided to give the sabotage task to John. It couldn't have been given to any better person. Not only was is clear that he'd feel very bad about it but he's also the only one who could convincingly pull it off that he's doing it all accidentally.

[@GhostandHorseAnimation]

Most other people would have taken the loss and told their team. Only John would have gone through with it like he did

[@MagicSwagget12]

When he brought in a sailor's hat for the "best thing to have on a car journey" prize task, it cemented him as my favourite contestant ever

[@Eddiearch]

Dara's reaction to seeing that John had built a random sandcastle in the middle of the task for no apparent reason is one of my favourite ever TM moments.

[@beesfoot]

Every single person in the world who heard John say "so I went up to the pharmacist" when talking about buying the plastic ducks, had their entire life pause for one second as their brain tried to establish if that is what he'd actually said.

[@emotionallychargedtowel]

To be fair to John, I've been to local pharmacies that sell bathing/body goods, random knick knacks. A rubber duckie isn't exactly out of the norm. Someone tell me that's the case??? I grew up in small towns/villages around England, however.

[@irresistablejewel]

He probably means Farmacist (for all things farm).

[@WondrousPurple]

John is one of my favorite Taskmaster contestants of all time. When he's puzzled or has failed, it's funny because he has tried so hard. (And when he tries to explain his rationale, it's even better.) When he succeeds -- he won multiple episodes and the trolley task was amazing! -- it's funny and also a bit heartwarming. :) Plus, he played so well with all of the contestants this series .. there was unmatched chemistry among the 5 of them and Greg & Alex.

[@jackwang9536]

John could easily have 2 tribute videos! 1) Dad's hands 2) Grape in a can of chickpeas 3) Toilet paper airplane 4) Face full of flour 5) Feather Loss-Gate, grab some chickens 6) Subbuteo streaker 7) One minute plays - Adulterous Southern astronaut (although, this task alone deserves its own tribute video)

[@thetek9]

This is missing John bringing in a business card for his prize task, which caused Fern and Greg to be in near tears laughing at him. Plus the toilet paper roll toss, where “gravity will provide the power”

[@starryxblue]

Even just reading the phrase “gravity will provide the power” made me crack up laughing

[@spikemurphy5054]

And Munya quoting him later in the same episode was the cherry on top.

[@zeldathomas3498]

hadn't realised Dara's entire head blushing with laughter and despair during the live task!

[@PrestonDLuffy]

Finally, this is the one contestant “Best of” I’ve been waiting for. You could make a super cut of every single prize task with John and I’d watch it (even though I’ve DEFINITELY rewatched the prize task openings of s14 multiple times already)

[@tatlockandfriends]

i love how soft-spoken and gentle his voice is and then sometimes he'll just SCREAM an expletive hahahaha john is such a legend

[@truboo4268]

I don't know what's funnier in the animal task, John forgetting what letter comes before M in the alphabet or him frantically yelling "B!" as he flops on the ground trying to mimic a crocodile.

[@gregbarratt7161]

"VEEEEEEE!"

[@namenamename390]

2:41 this once again reminds me that I'd really love to see a compilation of Alex breaking during Contestants' attempts

[@Peanutsbeta]

They could call it “Oops! All Parkinson”

[@TaskmasterMN]

John is the best ever! Nobody else takes 5 minutes to silently ponder before taking the most inexplicable, least-thought-through actions that anyone's ever made!

[@terryrolt755]

Can't wait for a sabotage task in TMMNII

[@MrPiapiou]

Well, There's Rhod. But he had the decency to have a good-enough plan after its ponders.

[@khalidhussein5346]

His ulysses twist joke is one of the best under the radar jokes in the entire show!

[@felix_christopher]

„Which Aircraft - Crashes more - into Mountains?” Gosh, I love these three!

[@rocktor1987]

Possibly my favorite contestant of all time. It's between him acaster and wozniak

[@dp-g5i]

add Bob Mortimer and Bridget Christie to this as well. Edit: and Sam Campbell

[@TaxMerry]

He seems so emotional when talking about his sailors hat.We love John!

[@Jayk-kz7sh]

I know John prefers to play off as the fool for laughs, but moments like 10:37 where you see glimpses of John’s more sinister side always crack me up. That bit when he laughs evilly into the camera and the task where he wanted to “maim someone” with a belt come to mind immediately 😂 That man may seem meek, but he has a rage deep down inside him

[@PrestonDLuffy]

He puts that darkness on the top shelf, where he thinks he can’t reach it. But he goes there

[@Tao_Tology]

​@@PrestonDLuffyHe climbs his step-ladder of awareness.

[@PrestonDLuffy]

@@Tao_Tologyaka the tv antennae he borrowed from Alex's caravan

[@Tao_Tology]

@@PrestonDLuffy The route of his downfall......

[@Audiodump]

22:50 This task has cemented to me that Fern is fucking insane. Just absolutely nuts. Dara is just so distraught about the insanity that comes out of her mouth.

[@carolmurphy7572]

Dara's reaction here left me gasping for air! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@Merip1214]

I never knew Fern before this, she's fantastic 😂

[@adamplace1414]

The worst part about watching John do the tasks is the sneaking suspicion that I would be even worse.

[@dp-g5i]

You mean like David Baddiel?

[@deepfriedpencil]

"Why are you buying ducks at the pharmacy" sounds a lot like "why are you shopping for clothes at the soup store"

[@hjt091]

The modern day Pierrot himself That business with the wind in the paint task is such a magnificent bit of tragic clownery

[@thefunkyJ]

The compilation I've been waiting for 😂 John is just on a different wavelength from everyone and I love it

[@nopants666]

i can't explain it but he and Judi Love are so similar in their approaches to tasks and then failing to talk themselves out of it

[@annaf2110]

19:06 genuinely thought I couldn’t laugh more than at the pharmacy ducks, and then the live task that episode happened

[@gregbarratt7161]

I wonder if duck sales at pharmacists have gone up since John's time on TM...🤔

[@Tao_Tology]

I think they must have. Any time I have a look in they have none left.

[@myiagros3744]

Don't know what it says about me but if I was looking for a rubber duck I would go to a pharmacy too!

[@bendaniel2271]

Alex was like a mob boss when he delivered the secret sabotage task

[@garethstruivigdegroot4837]

Hes fantastic, one of the best contestants ever.

[@Merip1214]

Dara at 8:51 The way he says IDIOT.. there's so much festered rage behind that😂

[@danielodonnell360]

I would love to see a movie of John as some sort of Johnny English kind of secret agent. His mix of weird talent for the physical tasks and generally anxious demeanour would be a phenomenal thing to watch in that kind of scenario.

[@ladambell]

Genuinely one of my favorite contestants of all time. John Kearns is a special breed.

[@Gemannihilator]

The way Alex says "pharmacy" at 19:00 gives me life

[@kellyheidel4337]

John Kearns is everything I never knew I always needed in my life.

[@Diaspora1984]

genuinely my favourite ever contestant.

[@guaranteedtopwn]

genuinely perhaps the funniest "oh!" of all time somehow, randomly, it just hits right

[@tylerweirtube]

I loved this series' cast. All great in their own way.

[@NickHoad]

Despite all the sabotage and wolf impressions and so on, the moment of John’s that’s stuck with me the most is him insisting, against all evidence, that he’s not bad at the duck and sock task

[@interstellargreenbean]

This was the best series. Best cast, best a tasks.

[@CallMeProm]

I was really unsure of John in the first episode but I was hooked by episode 2. I still think John and Munya need a buddy sitcom.

[@MichaelCoombes776]

I feel like John must be the contestant Alex laughed at the most, it somehow makes things even funnier when Alex is giggling away in the background. Even better when he's in shot and clearly trying very hard not to break completely.

[@BooFlo62]

The Veeeee!!! Brings me to tears every time

[@zacharygrouwinkel1534]

But what about “I found a naughty satsuma, in my fantastic curry”?

[@Pinodebeste1983]

Might be the best contestant ever on the show.

[@carolmurphy7572]

This cast was fantastic! What a treat this whole series was!

[@dimpyramid]

that sailor hat was used in the boat task in series 15, haha

[@yalikejazz2]

the video we’ve all been waiting for

[@tsherwood8960]

“Veeeeeeee!!!!”

[@TrevorCopter]

I love the two seconds of Dara and Fern’s confusion before Alex plays the VT of John’s sabotage task 😂

[@pikapika4240]

I love Dara's reaction in 19:58, it screams "why am I stuck with these two here" 😅

[@CNBat]

The hat sandcastle knocks me dead every time

[@brnobr]

john if you ever read this, you have been my favorite contestant on this show ever

[@chriskaprys]

He seems like a classic character from some lost season of Cheers. What a delight.

[@Botchla_]

Such a good series. The sabotage was a great touch.

[@alexisz5570]

Fern: I think John should do that Dara’s face said otherwise

[@h0lly_blue]

"I'm opening chickpeas..."

[@TheMarkoSeke]

Omg I searched for "Taskmaster best of John Kearns" like two days ago, I feel like I manifested this lol

[@homeiswonderland]

In a compilation of, "Most stressful tasks as a viewer," John's sabotage is number one. I'm stressed for John, I'm stressed for Dara and Fern, I don't know who the hell I'm cheering for, but I know it can only end in tragedy.

[@gentlemendesperado9790]

John Kearns is definitely most underrated contestant

[@anotherone5235]

That Live Team-Task about asking a question though... :D

[@a.j.thompson6030]

STOHP EIHTTTT is one of my favorite bits ever. Truly my favorite season.

[@svensnoek3251]

The sabotage task must be the hardest task ever since Dara en Fern must have have thought he was annoying as fuck for the whole season

[@TheYorkRose]

Every task is like he's intentionally sabotaging it (like "genuine pleasure" while he's making painful noises) BUT I do think his crocodile and wolf were actually half decent 😢

[@reidl4767]

I just think John Kearns and Mike Wozniak would make the best team Taskmaster has ever seen. Soft spoken, brilliant bizarre magic

[@davidyoung5114]

What? No inclusion of the baggage cart-pushing task at Heathrow airport? Seeing John at the end of the task fearing that he had 'crossed the line' and would be disqualified (like Joe Wilkinson's potato hole-in-one in Series 2!) was the best moment from that episode for me!

[@Zurrech]

At 22:30. You could probably argue that Munya and Sarah got the Overall and Dungarees the first round. The task was to make Greg say the word not leave it as an answer.

[@jamesramplin8124]

Greg is the taskmaster. His decisions are final. He said "it's either, just to tea it up..." so he kinda changed the rules halfway through just because he thought of 2 things and wanted to make it interesting.

[@Cynndora]

Love greg's reaction to the wolf howl.

[@misterrcommenter]

i expected the helicopter description to be in ferns best bits

[@ConradMcBad]

An absolute casserole of anxious chaos. Love it.

[@AFancyLemon]

Which aircraft… crashes more… into mountains

[@axe.a.scene5]

the fact that john kearns went to my uni is objectively hilarious

[@patrickevans2041]

The top hat sandcastle pops into my head at least 4 times a week

[@Bromeostasis]

Biggest regrets in the milk task is my favorite

[@leafan101]

Having even a moderate degree of athletic ability and watching him attempting physical tasks is like being in one of those dreams where you find you cannot run or jump or even move normally.

[@Sunprism]

"That was Fantastic! Can you lift my flap?"

[@MongisiMabhena]

I've been waiting for this one 🥳

[@FilbieTron]

I was in stitches the whole time! I forgot how funny this season was

[@liam00]

Saw him live and he was great! 😂

[@mattgyrich1531]

The best 'worst' contestant since Joe Wilkinson.

[@RyHughes1978]

I definitely agree about the business card 👍

[@mathildejensen3285]

Just pissed my pants laughing watching John's defeated face after he failed at finding pleasure in the rubber chutes. 😂😂

[@SennaAugustus]

Has anyone figured out what he wrote with his Wingdings Enigma machine?

[@spikemurphy5054]

John Kearn’s ‘V’ still makes me HOWL with laughter.

[@CB-zv9cl]

Half of this compilation is just Dara being absolutely irritated with someone else. 😅

[@ethanol1586]

John is the physical embodiment of anxiety