House Rules For Kids | World's Strictest Parents Reaction

[@erint933]

Thank you so much for affirming me in my role as a mother, I'm in tears because I haven't been brave in my role, or even seeing it clearly as a calling from God. I mean I did logically but I had been basing my view of myself from my past failures instead of being just simply confident in God's calling for me. Wow. Thank you...

[@AndReaMckay94]

I come from the UK and remember watching the show when it first aired. I was about the same age as the teens, maybe slightly younger. I identified with them a lot at the time. I still do to some degree. I don’t necessarily agree with all of your house rules but I respect that you are unwavering in your beliefs and I think it’s very admirable that you enforce rules for your household. I think all households do this to some degree. It was quite wholesome to see this reaction video. I remember your episode more vividly than most of the other episodes from the series. Anyway I wish you and your family well.

[@TeachingSelfGovernment]

Thank you for your comment! Each family has their own set of rules and such and they should be consistent in enforcing them. I wish you and YOUR family well too!

[@paulettedavis1001]

Yes yes yes. I NEED this now! Mom of 9, 7 still at home and we are lost and this is the answer to every problem I'm experiencing with roles, expectations, unity, older teens and youngers, as well as how to parent and not be passive bc I am trying to avoid confronting negative behavior. I seriously believe Father sent me here. Just so overwhelmed I don't know where to start and can't get the information fast enough.

[@jefferyalpha803]

Were you able to implement the information and find relief?

[@agalachowska5819]

What made you have so many kids? Just wondering. 🙂

[@TeachingSelfGovernment]

Sorry for the late response. I'd say the best place to start would be my online TSG Parenting Course. It'll get you on the right track and give you what you need step by step. teachingselfgovernment.com/tsg-parenting-course/ I hope this helps!

[@susanaferreira2076]

From what i have seen, the most important thing is to have both parents calm, firm and alignhed ......that's the big thing for me .

[@Candypack1]

Please share an update on the teens!! I really want to know what happened to them. I’m very invested.

[@hollywood7702]

I so wish you were my auntie so I could have grown up looking and learning, getting good point of references 😊

[@TeachingSelfGovernment]

Thank you! Although I'm not your auntie, I hope I can still be a positive influence for you!

[@magalyestremera5251]

👍🏻. I appreciate your tone and consistency ❤

[@TeachingSelfGovernment]

I appreciate that!

[@friendlysky7674]

NICKOLEEN OUR QUEEN GO GIRL♥️

[@TheBibleDIET]

I like this house rules! What you have said about clothing is very true, I have learned that through the years

[@TeachingSelfGovernment]

You're welcome to steal our family standard, if you'd like. :)

[@soniaexplores_]

I LOL'd when she said,"You don't gotta show your underwear to look good!" Very true!

[@lindaosorio2187]

I love your videos! Thank you 🙏🏼

[@TeachingSelfGovernment]

You are so welcome!

[@myokchung]

Thank you for all your heart touching instructions. It was very helpful to me. I have 2 grown up sons and 7year old son. I've been having trouble how to interact with them and my husband. I would like to learn more from your instructions. Thanks 👍 again!

[@TeachingSelfGovernment]

That can definitely be frustrating. Since I don't know a lot about your specific struggles and situation, my advice is to be deliberate in actions you know will open your heart and increase your bond with your husband and your children. For more specific help, keep looking through my videos! Also, feel free to look around my website. teachingselfgovernment.com

[@ishalocke1123]

I appreciate the house rules - and one tip I’m trying to adjust to is getting ‘buy in’ from our oldest now that she’s a teenager on consequences. By giving her a voice as to expectations on issues like honesty, and discussing them ahead of time, when the issue comes up it’s at least not a surprise - if not ‘less dramatic.’ It’s a process being able to talk to your kids about the reasons for the rules as well, i.e. safety, health, a good life.

[@TeachingSelfGovernment]

Yes! Pre-teaching expectations and consequences (positive and negative) is key! Great thought!

[@lindaosorio2187]

Yes, rules are important!

[@TeachingSelfGovernment]

Absolutely!

[@ashleyallen1858]

I love these house rules! I bought the book and need to implement some house rules for our home too!

[@TeachingSelfGovernment]

You've got this!

[@Mama-dx3zn]

Love it, need more videos on house rules pls

[@lillymichael8369]

You mentioned in other videos that we have to explain why we make certain decisions. But what if the kids are disagreeing with the decisions and the reasons behind the decisions. To what extend should we make sure a child is in understanding of the rules parents make? Thanks

[@TeachingSelfGovernment]

I like this question! My book, "Roles: The Secret to Family, Business, and Social Success" would shed a lot of light on this question. Also, the skill Disagreeing Appropriately would be very helpful here as well! Here are a couple of links to access content that could help you: teachingselfgovernment.com/store/roles-hardcover/ kzbin.info/www/bejne/gnixgHWgfaZqZsU&pp=ygUlbmljaG9sZWVuIHBlY2sgZGlzYWdyZWUgYXBwcm9wcmlhdGVseQ%3D%3D I hope this helps!

[@erint933]

This is so good, thank you...and lol I found myself getting anxious in the tv clip parts, lol...as if I was there trying to get the kids to calm down. Oh funny...I think it's because my kids tend to plow over me, eek. I'm wondering with the dress code, did you find your kids rebelled some after leaving your home? I have a 13 yr old that a number of times I've had to correct her on what she's wearing. We don't let certain clothes in our home but it was how she was wearing the clothes she has that wasn't good. She says were too strict. I really like what you're saying that to dress modestly shows respect. That's so good. So ya I've wondered if she might rebel later on...How do we capture their hearts? Thank you!🙂

[@jodipirelli8480]

No coffee and tea yeah I think you’re taking it to the extreme honey

[@TeachingSelfGovernment]

It's part of our beliefs and we've seen that it's helpful for us. It's not for everyone, and that's okay.

[@soulpinkendeavors]

Hi Nicholeen, I loved watching your episode on BBC World's Strictest Parents. I'm curious, did you end up keeping in touch with the teens, Hanna and James, who stayed in your home after the show aired?

[@consejosdemama6084]

Mrs Nicholeen thank you so much for all your help and understanding. Do you have a video in which you explain what you have in your home binder? And what it is in it? Thank you so much for all your help

[@TeachingSelfGovernment]

Are you talking about our family standard? I'm not sure I understand your question.

[@sebastianguerrero9472]

I love her so much on the show but I have to admit the kids are more entertaining also to the show should come back once Covid is over they should have an all star edition like returning families to do the show but with a whole new group of kids

[@TeachingSelfGovernment]

That would be cool, wouldn't it?

[@shaziaaslam6104]

Great Totally impressed

[@TeachingSelfGovernment]

Thank you!

[@hellybelle5]

I watched the episode years ago, and it made me realize how important modesty is, in a different way from how I'd understood it before. I'm going to do the house rules list, and the no answers. Do you have a printout of your house rules, or do I need to do the self government training? I've been meaning to for ages ❤️

[@sugarbabylove1000]

I need to listen to this over and over, I like this house rules idea

[@TeachingSelfGovernment]

A family standard is so important in a family! I'm glad you found the video helpful.

[@rebekahweslake1814]

Hi Nicholeen, loved this! I would love to see more about how Hannah and James are going now in their lives. I am a mum of 5 ages 0-10 and have been contemplating my younger sister coming to live with us. She is 18 years my junior and is in fact 18. I’m thinking if she came to live with us in a granny flat out the back that it would be good to do what you did with Hannah and James and ask her to live by our house rules. What do you think? Or is she too old for that? But I’m a little worried about her influence over my children. That they would look up to her and she does not share the same values as us; clothing choices, faith and use of tech etc

[@TeachingSelfGovernment]

What a great thing to analyze and think about! You're not alone in concerns like this. I know this is a year later than when you asked the question, but here's what I would do. Since your sister is legally an adult, the best thing to do is to first pre-teach your children that your sister might live a different standard than you and your family do, but what she does isn't going to be the way you and your family do things. Tell your children that you will probably talk with them often about behaviors exhibited from your sister and discuss if they're good or bad and how to react to them. After that, I would let your sister know the rules and standards that your family lives by and that she's expected to respect them, even if she chooses not to live by them. Then be sure to be consistent in helping your children analyze what they see and what it means. I hope that helps!

[@michellemaddox17]

I absolutely think the family needs house rules laid out that everyone is expected to abide by with consistency. We are loving your book and working to implement a family structure based on your teachings. Yes, everyone's rules may look different, but the important thing is that they have them and teach them calmly. Thank you so much for your teachings! I'm mastering the art of calm and it makes all the difference!

[@TeachingSelfGovernment]

You're so welcome! I'm so glad that you're setting up a system in your home to help you children!

[@acciogryffindor]

I'll never forget when Hannah said ''Hi to meet you''

[@repentorperish6414]

I would like to watch this episode but the link doesn't work.does anyone have a working link to watch it

[@TeachingSelfGovernment]

Of course! Here it is: kzbin.info/door/nmrXkYZ5O9Rth9SASOYOJA

[@TheWinns11]

It’s okay to have a dress code! In my opinion your dress code was quit strict. I’m not trying to hate I’m just saying. I understand no stomach. I think no shoulders is a little nitpicking along with no thighs. There is still ways to be modest without covering every inch.

[@TeachingSelfGovernment]

And that's okay! That's the standard that we wanted for our family and each family will have their own set of standards. Some of our standards are there to prepare for different religious beliefs and practices later down the road, which is why they could seem overly strict to some people. But the idea is to HAVE a standard for your family, then stick to it. :)

[@queenoftherats2785]

I- I like to think i'm a good kid but I would've died if I lived with these rules just because of the energy drink, coffee and religion thing

[@chloebrown4981]

I understand not wanting to show cleavage and things like that but I personally don’t understand the shoulders part. Especially when they were from the UK so the weather they experienced would’ve been totally different to what you are used to every day. I don’t think that showing your shoulders would make you act any different to the world or give the impression to anyone that you are trying to look sexy in any way.

[@christinab.2864]

I have watched the show but I didn’t think it was you guys. I always thought the caffeine rule was for the show but now I’m noticing that it’s not staged. I wonder why I don’t see many of the parents on this like one example the strict family from Portland, Tennessee I actually found them at a ball game one night. It’s like it’s something about them they want hide?

[@FebbieG]

"I don't take it personally when some has an outburst like that." (Paraphrase) How would you handle an adult outburst/adult tantrum from an adult in a position of authority over you?

[@TeachingSelfGovernment]

There's a free calm parenting toolkit on this page teachingselfgovernment.com/ It will help you not only with your children, but also with any child or adult. I also have an audio class called The Power of Calm where I talk about my six step process for how to be calm when someone else isn't and how to help them be calm too. teachingselfgovernment.com/store/power-of-calm/

[@Heather-ef2vw]

I am learning so much

[@TeachingSelfGovernment]

Yay! I'm so glad!

[@ashlielaurensmith]

How can this method help with children in school setting with ODD and ADHD?

[@christineb2640]

I love this video ❤

[@TeachingSelfGovernment]

I'm so glad!

[@CandyManmusic]

Would love a complete list of what your house rules are so I can see and implement as well 😊… my name is Eve I’m using my husbands old account from years ago and we have completely changed out parenting now to much closer to your values . So it would be nice to have a list to go off of and add to my existing

[@stephanielmt]

I know it's off-topic, but what do you do if your kid wants to quit playing an instrument? My child in question is only six years old (almost seven) and has been playing the piano for a little less than a year. I know when I was a kid, I got a "no" answer with no opportunity to disagree and that didn't work for me! I was miserable for years because of all the "you can't quit" piano drama. My husband and I don't agree whether to allow him to quit or not. I don't see the point in forcing this particular issue, though I think you can't just allow your kids to quit whatever they want whenever they want.

[@soniaexplores_]

I'm curious about that too! I've heard some kids grow up wishing their parents didn't let them quit. But, others have resentment because the parents "forced" them to. So which one??

[@TeachingSelfGovernment]

Great question! The biggest thing I did for my children was to give them a vision of the future with their musical pursuits. I didn't force them to stay with an instrument, but I gave them expectations and helped them set goals. I helped them see what they could do and opportunities that would be open to them if they continued and worked through the hard times of practicing. I also helped them see what their future might look like if they choose to quit. I personally quit piano when I was young and I still regret it to this day because that's one less way that I can't help or bless others around me. My daughter has become a wonderful singer and musician and tells me often how she shares her gifts with others to bring happiness to them and herself. There are times I wish I was able to do that as well, but my mission is to help people with their family relationships.

[@VincentBalducci]

That’s so neat! Several of my friends are LDS/Mormon and I remember the dietary aspect of the faith and I was shocked too with no coffee and chocolate. I was even more impressed with how the faith does a lot with family tree research I thought that was neat!

[@TeachingSelfGovernment]

Yes, I'm a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. And yes, we don't drink coffee, tea (herbal is fine), or alcohol, but chocolate is TOTALLY fine. I think I'd have a serious problem if chocolate was off the table. It's one of my favorite things! :) We're really big on family history, so many members of the Church spend lots of time doing genealogy. It's becoming more of a wide-spread hobby, though! It's amazing!

[@joseydaley1688]

How can I get in touch with you?

[@TeachingSelfGovernment]

Hi Josey! I'm a pretty busy woman, but I do offer one-on-one mentoring sessions for $250/hr. If you have general questions you'd like answered, my IT guy, Richard, would be happy to help you out! You can reach him at [e-mail].

[@FebbieG]

If you live in the same house, where have you been filming these videos?

[@TeachingSelfGovernment]

:D Someone had to ask this question. The moment I saw this video I realized someone would ask. You are the one! My film crew has a house that they use just for filming. It has lots of space and good lighting options too, so it really is ideal. If you look at my older videos, I was in my house in those. ;)

[@margaretrobison3618]

Any Special approached for a 7 year old with ADHD who has 2 older brothers,

[@TeachingSelfGovernment]

If you haven't already seen them, I've made quite a few videos about handling ADHD behaviors. Here are some links to a few of them: kzbin.info/www/bejne/r2PXln96qLxsj6c kzbin.info/www/bejne/pYqUfn1rar6ZZ6c kzbin.info/www/bejne/fn_FpHSHfcyEodU I hope this helps!

[@anthonykearns4041]

You can change your life for better life, if habits become an addiction, ask any recovered addict ,life's an addiction, most of the families in the broadcast value their culture or religion, you can't force children too bow down to these,children follow trends,like music fashion gang culture, or racial, or what's reality to them .

[@TeachingSelfGovernment]

Thanks for sharing your thoughts.

[@tomhocutt2013]

Single no kids guy here I remember seeing this.

[@habibaroyees]

Agree

[@richardhopkins9017]

What about grandkids who stay for 1 month.

[@TeachingSelfGovernment]

Great question! A big thing to do is to set boundaries and expectations. This is called a pre-teach. If your grandchildren know what to expect, they're much more likely to be obedient and less anxious. Here's a link to one of my other videos about setting boundaries that could be helpful for you: kzbin.info/www/bejne/mpXSYqFqerR2e68

[@amybussells6553]

Did you let them celebrate they 21 birthday. Have any Foster kid bring physical aggressive with you or own kid

[@TeachingSelfGovernment]

Yes, birthdays are celebrated. But, our family has specific rules about what we do and don't do. If the foster children were in our home for their 21st birthday, they would have to abide by the standards we have for our home. When we did foster care, they never were aggressive with my children.

[@niaola4019]

I have two teenage boys and twelve year old daughter. I really need the ground rules for my family. I need help

[@TeachingSelfGovernment]

Probably learning the Four Basic Skills, the Five Teaching Styles, and having a Family Standard would help. I teach all those in my course and in the book, Parenting A House United. teachingselfgovernment.com/store/

[@shaimaatorky7867]

But the line is not clear between our authority and children freedom . They might rebel

[@TeachingSelfGovernment]

This is a roles issue. I address it in much greater depth in my book, "Roles". You can find it here: teachingselfgovernment.com/store-category/materials/ I hope this helps!

[@richardhopkins9017]

Teenagers and cellphones in bedroom. All my friends take theirs in the bedroom all night.

[@butterflydiva72]

She's all about hating vanity but colours her hair and wears make-up????

[@TeachingSelfGovernment]

Just for clarification, I actually don't color my hair and my makeup is minimal. However, there is a big difference between hair coloring and makeup and vanity. From Webster's 1828 dictionary, vanity is described as: 1. Emptiness; want of substance to satisfy desire; uncertainty; inanity. 2. Fruitless desire or endeavor. 3. Trifling labor that produces no good. 4. Emptiness; untruth 5. Empty pleasure; vain pursuit; idle show; unsubstantial enjoyment. 6. Ostentation; arrogance. 7. Inflation of mind upon slight grounds; empty pride, inspired by an overweening conceit of one's personal attainments or decorations. Fops cannot be cured of their vanity Vanity is more of a compensation for something missing or an obsession with something that isn't meaningful or worthwhile. I hope that you were able to grasp some of the deeper messages of this video without being too distracted by my outer features. Valuable lessons can come from many different kinds of people from many walks of life.

[@jodipirelli8480]

Yeah, I agree you’re now dictating to them what they can drink based on your beliefs and I don’t agree with that at all. Take it back and not Chester.

[@TeachingSelfGovernment]

While they aren't my children, they were placed in my home for a week, expected to be treated as if they WERE my children. Therefore, we explained our family rules to them as we would one of our own children who forgot them or were expected to live by them after coming back home to live.

[@amorphousface2401]

You are a wack-a-doodle but at least you provide a stable home.

[@queenoftherats2785]

period xD I would've died without my monster energy drink

[@TeachingSelfGovernment]

I take that as a complement! I know I'm not your mainstream mom, but I see that as a good thing. :)

[@lindaosorio2187]

Can you help us? How can I contact you?

[@TeachingSelfGovernment]

Sure! Here's the best way to contact me: teachingselfgovernment.com/contact/ If you have questions that you wouldn't mind being answered on a group platform, I'd love to have you on my weekly Support Group call! teachingselfgovernment.com/store/support-group/ I hope this helps!