Dare to Question Why We Are So Afraid of Getting Older: Scilla Elworthy at TEDxMarrakesh 2012

[@leftykeys6944]

Back in 2002, I won an award from a writing contest with just this simple quote: "I am a firm believer in life after youth"

[@undercoverhamster2549]

Brilliant!

[@joannahzamora]

Where can we find it?

[@leftykeys6944]

@@joannahzamora, it was called "A Brief Letter From The Heart" and was hosted by the Japanese. I don't know if it is anywhere to be found, all these years later.

[@lisapiccirilli4908]

Excellent!!

[@mollypinto4666]

That is a fabulous way to put it🙌

[@ariellapper53]

Is not the fear of getting old per see, it is the fear of being vulnerable, poor and abused. The fear of being lonely and forgotten and a stranger to everyone. That's the real fear.

[@karlaelvis9815]

@barb lee "Mental and physical capacity" are controlled, to a large extent, by the choices we make in life decades before ... choices regarding what we eat, how much we exercise, the folks that we choose to surround ourselves with. If we make wise choices regarding these things, we build a foundation of good physical and mental health. As we age, the benefits derived from the strong foundation become more and more obvious. Good choices in these areas are parallel to "saving for retirement" (financially); keep making "regular deposits" in this account and years down the road you will be "wealthy" (physical/emotional health) beyond belief.

[@NinesCatudio]

So very well said

[@wandareichard3229]

I think your comment is less about fear and more about these 5 words in my head.. Are we having fun yet?

[@_S-O-S_]

@Thomas casidy UNTRUE...

[@_S-O-S_]

@barb lee True...

[@karlaelvis9815]

I am 61 years young - I care not what I look like, though I "look quite good" - only because I exercise daily, eat well and engage in spiritual activities (and I am an artist). If I die tomorrow, I'm good with that. In the meantime, I will continue to live a "life of service", shining my light wherever I can. I have no children and my husband just passed away - I'm on my own... and that is fine. I will continue to move forward on the path that I feel is right for me, with the knowledge that all will be well. FEAR is a plague that I do not wish to invite...

[@karenkaren3189]

Karla Elvis I like your attitude. So sorry about your loss, but sounds like you are moving forward with your life.🙂

[@oceanpoet1]

I so applaud this reply. Bravo!!!

[@bj77755]

You are still young and on your second journey in life. Enjoy..

[@gstylez0107]

Good for you, I'm 30 and only hope to have your attitude when I'm that age

[@karlaelvis9815]

@@gstylez0107 You can, but it is no accident; start now by "investing in yourself" via making good choices regarding the food you eat, the amount that you exercise, and the people that you surround yourself with.

[@Technicolor-mother]

We are afraid because we can't fit in our society with how much it loves youthful - not necessarily useful people. Because of invisibility. There would be less fear if we lived in an elder respecting society.

[@Jcandy20012]

I see what you are saying but the way i feel when we get older we might look at all the young ones like kids. I am 32 and see all these 20 year olds and they are kids to me lol Someone in there 50s or 60 might see me as just a kid lol kinda how it is and you will fit in there will be older people too.

[@debbieharriman1194]

+Andy Holcroft right on andy I agree.

[@debbieharriman4048]

I agree Shannon

[@davidpearlactorteacherbizman]

I moved to Asia last year, aged 54. I Less of this ageism...

[@maneskinnnnn7190]

so you are afraid because of what they patriarchy think???? Lol who cares what they think??? have some self respect

[@jackbudgen8858]

I've only just turned 24 and I'm panicking about being old. I think I need to chill a bit

[@GangiFilms]

I am 27 and going bald!

[@user-zp8jv2yt7s]

17 and I'm worried

[@ranstackzz7009]

Jack Budgen I’m 15 and worried

[@Upper_echelon_exotics]

Yeah. You youngn's need to chill.

[@girlfriday1299]

Gangi Films When I was in high school, my algebra teacher was 22 and bald. He was very smart and he was also cute and pretty popular. 😉

[@yowee1234]

"When we are useful... that emptiness disappears". There is so much wisdom in this Ted talk. I'm 25 and I'm terrified of growing older. This speech gives me great hope that I can feel peace, happiness, and worth no matter what my age and appearance is. That there is so much that I'm meant for that has nothing to do with my appearance. Thank you for this- I needed it.

[@teasesquezze]

Enjoy being 25 and never worry about aging. None of us know if we will be here tomorrow, next week or next year. You will regret wasting your youth worrying about aging. Aging is not nice, but it is a long way away from 25. Enjoy every minute and do not waste a moment of it. Worry is like sitting in a rocking chair, it gets you nowhere but gives you something to do. Dont just exist LIVE.

[@mamalovesthebeach437]

I remember being terrified at 25 too ... I also remember looking back at 30, 40, 50 and 60 saying to myself, "damn! I looked great!" I've finally stopped looking back and now appreciate today and look forward to tomorrow. I am active, vibrant and always learning and growing (at 63). Don't let society set your standards - create your own. Stay off social media BS (it will increase your anxiety!). Stay active and engaged and be interested in other people. Spend time in nature and laugh ... life is truly beautiful and if you feel that it will exude from you at any age : ) xxoo

[@trainingvisions]

Yowee, google for the u-curve of happiness and you will know that there is nothing to be afraid of, except your own fears and beliefs

[@megaknight5858]

yowee1234 hey are you 30 now?

[@megaknight5858]

yowee1234 omg are you 30? You are 30+10 = 40 omg only 10 years after that you’re unable to be active!!!!

[@acajudi100]

I am 77, and getting older is a blessing. Death comes at all ages, and even before birth.

[@korpen3770]

Getting older chronologically is a blessing, not getting older biologically.

[@Weeflowerofscotland]

Exactly!! Not everyone is privileged to grow old!

[@-simplicity7551]

You're right, people die in the middle of their youth. We have two choices, die young or get the chance to grow old.

[@dammar117]

@korpen3770 Finally someone who says it how it is.

[@andrealehman9566]

My issue with growing older is how people start treating you different, like you're weak or useless, unneeded. I don't look, in the mirror, the way I do in my head (like I'm still in the 20s/30s), people don't treat me the way they did when I was in my 20s/30s. It's almost like an out of body experience, my mentality doesn't match up with how I look, feel, or how I'm treated by others.

[@Lithiel]

It's my birthday today and I'm upset about it, this talk helped me.

[@motherofangels1710]

I never put much thought into getting older or dying until my children unexpectedly tragically died... and the world kept moving forward without them in it. It's not so much the dying or being dead... it's the fear of ceasing to exist and going out of this world alone, that is my constant interruption in my mind.

[@bethelshiloh]

💔

[@jessicamanees]

I'm afraid of getting old because of getting fragile and dying!

[@christopherellis2663]

Well, eat proper food and get daily exercise

[@lunafringe10]

just look at your parents any you ll know whats coming im most cases

[@mitch5222]

Me too

[@mysu3777]

I don’t know why I found this comment so funny. yeah I think the same too but like 😂😂

[@stephaniepersin4145]

Everybody dies one day. Only when you embrace reality and accept it’s beyond your control, will you finally live a better life.

[@Ryantravisaol]

for me, ageing is just another reminder that time has passed, we don't get a second chance, and death is coming whether you're fulfilled and ready or your'e not

[@MrGuizmoguizmo]

this is depressing

[@udakangwa6091]

no matter how much money you have, you'll never defy the law of nature .....aging is real and whether you like it or not you'll get old and die eventually no matter how young you're now .....life is a cycle of birth, living and death.

[@charlottecarlos6296]

Death can come AT ANY age.

[@brendadrew834]

From all NDE worldwide now we don't die...only our bodies do! Our spirits and souls live on! And I think we do get a second chance. Life is just Life University with lots of lessons to learn and if we don't learn certain lessons,guess what? We have to come back and learn once again! Have no fear...even though I've never had a NDE, I have seen signs from the Other side...we're never alone! Peace, love and namaste~

[@lunafringe10]

but maybe your next life is more exciting then this one, you dont know

[@TheAllie321]

I am 83 and never in my life did I have the courage to be my self I am so sorry about that and that is so sad.

[@quarentinedlove2903]

❤️

[@Embodied.bliss.somatics]

You can start right now ✨🧚🏼‍♂️💫🌸 I believe in YOU!!

[@normadesmond6017]

I am 58, but I know what you mean. Sometimes, in the middle of the night - I feel like i am suffocating. And I am already thinking that this is it for me. And it will not happen for me during this lifetime. And it's been a wasted life for sure.

[@sophiebrindeau2722]

TheAllie321 You can be yourself now it is again possible try and you will be so happy and in peace with yourself 👍😊 every thing can be change if you really want believe in you trust you

[@bruh2391]

How was the life in ur younger times?

[@biljam972]

I turned 46 and started to feel invisible. Suddenly, people are no longer nice to me, just cold "Yes ma'm", official cold voices, treat me like "elderly" which really caught me off gard because I wasn't expecting that this soon. It's like suddenly I am no longer person that deserves kindness or attention. But that is not even the worst. Worst is health decline which is also sudden and unexpected, then final aknowledgment that I am single and alone and will probably stay that way, that my carer is where it is, and nowhere close I wanted it to be and what i worked so hard for. It's devastating.

[@issamanganga7681]

I am turning 40 years soon and it feels weird..the effects of aging are ravaging my body too and the loneliness and invisibility doesn't make matters any easier..making things worse is the fact that friends and family members are dying right, left and center..the fact that younger guys call me an "O.G" or " uncle" just gives me the chills..aging is definitely not for sissies!!!

[@biljam972]

@@issamanganga7681 so true. But there is no real acceptable alternative so we have to adjust. I dunno this sudden transition is awful!

[@issamanganga7681]

@@biljam972 I feel like there is no alternative because I did my apprentice at a nursing home and at a hospice and to see how the end will be, I just had to stop working there because of the emotional trauma of seeing people "passing"...the transition from middle-aged to old is really traumatizing and don't start on job searching..oh! I see on your job application that you are 40 years old oh! we will call you soon or soonish! 😂

[@bizznick444joe7]

I feel the same all I hear is yes sir. When I started hearing people simply call me by that moniker it made me feel pretty bad. It's like no one wants to be my friend and treat me like a distant uncle or something.

[@superfreakmusic7681]

Yeah, this is the reality for so many and yet somehow we're told that we should think these awful changes are the best thing that ever happened to us. Theres no sympathy and no support for those who hate the ageing process-only sternly wagging fingers and harsh judgements for being so 'negative.' It's alright for the ones who are healthy, good looking and who have sailed through the menopause-what do they know about the suffering the rest of us have had to endure?

[@quarentinedlove2903]

For me aging comes with being ignored in society and it comes with health problems and it comes with feeling like you hadn’t achieved enough and never getting second chances I always had the idea that you can start over but you really can’t after a certain age .

[@agata2778]

Absolutely amazing speech. Since I've turned twenty i started freaking out seeing wrinkles on my young faces. I am afraid of aging. Everybody is but we don't talk about it enough, and we aren't taught how to live with it. People prefer to remove eveey sign of growing older with bigger or smaller medical surgeries. Thank you madame for this fantastic presentation. You are an inspiration❤

[@the_film_scene]

$270 Billion dollars spent on fighting nature? Amazing. The true beauty of who we are should be appreciated with our mental contributions. Share with the world your talents.

[@bluejackscanada]

Yeah. spending money on vaccines, antibiotics were a waste of money! Glad to see you said "NO" to all medical intervention, as it is NOT NATURAL"! You are naturally supposed to die before AGE 30 of infectious disease like they did in the middle ages. BRING BACK POLIO! SO MANY CHILDREN HAVE NOT HAD A CHANCE TO GET POLIO! Follow the path NATURE set out for you! Seeing your grandchildren is overrated!

[@MJBrewer]

^ A bit disillusioned. But keep on writing... Someone may read it.

[@abitofeverythingbynastassi6273]

@@bluejackscanada dude! Wtf!

[@shamelesschic9491]

@@bluejackscanada I appreciate your observations & comments as well as those of the presenter. So wonderful that we humans can benefit from such a wealth of science and viewpoints, and then have free will to be-and evolve into-our most authentic selves! Best wishes to all!

[@caanchui8955]

"When we are useful... that emptiness disappears".. . beautiful!!! thank you!!!

[@justmadeit2]

If you have peace of mind and have had a lifetime of happiness and if you have lots of great experiences then you dont fear old age. If however you feel like you are missing out on life and you havent had a life of great experiences then old age is a dreadful thought because you feel the pressure of time, you are aware that you dont have much time to turn things around and a life of regret. Agree ?

[@RababaInc]

absolutely

[@slim2178]

The fear is of getting close to end of life. Nor everyone have a chance to have full life. Things slow down and the rest of the society looks at old people as burden. I belong to a dance group with mostly retired people and they are incredibly talented and energetic. Learned so much, developed friendships and life doesn't look as scary. 🙂

[@brendadrew834]

Very good!! Yes, it all starts with self-love! I'm a senior citizen who lives alone with two cats after 42 years of marriage. But I love being single again and luckily have grown daughters and two granddaughters and we all try and stay as close as we can. They've flown the nest and I don't feel that lonely because I'm connected to community, write in a gratitude journal and also meditate. Being close to nature also helps and having lots of interests. I have MS but just use a cane and am a partially blind professional artist and I'm enjoying painting after retiring...keeping busy helps along with helping others if one can ...we can all donate old clothes in good condition and go through our pantries and pass on non perishable food items to others in need. I don't have the energy I used to have and was also a fitness trainer at one point, but MS is an energy depleting chronic disease which can be reversed if one lives a clean life, exercises, takes necessary vitamins and herbs and one doesn't smoke, drink too much and get lots of sleep which is really super important for all..it's very healing as well. My MS was in remission for 25 years and only got a bit worst in the last few years. I had two grandmothers and one of them lived into old age and never had any fear of growing older..one is as old as they feel like they say! KEEP A SENSE OF HUMOR ALSO HELPS BIG TIME!! Thanks for sharing~

[@mitch5222]

Thanks. I am so scared of getting old.

[@brendadrew834]

@@mitch5222 Nothing you can do about getting older but you and all of us can adjust our thinking/feeling about it! Some days I hate getting older, my mind is almost as sharp as when I was in my 20s and 30s, I still "Feel young at heart", but the bod has a bit of trouble keeping up with that! Keep a going and keep the faith! Stay as positive as you can! Negativity only brings one down! Don't want to go there! Connect with nature as it's very healing along with all the arts and our beloved furbabies, too! Keep connected with them and friends and family as well! We're all one and in this together. You're not alone in your feelings! Blessed be- peace, love and namaste~

[@mitch5222]

@@brendadrew834 thanks. Honestly i dont see any point in this life. I have some health problems already. Whats the point of this life? Everyday struggling even to wake up and beeing alone for the rest of my life. I wish i have never been born.

[@brendadrew834]

@@mitch5222 Hey, some days I feel the same way! Again, you''re not alone in this respect! You have millions of people worldwide who feel the same way. But, these feelings of dread can come and go in waves! Think of the people suffering in Ukraine right now and all those millions of homeless refugees and little innocent children and babies. I'm sure they sometimes feel the same way. They have to all keep their spirits up! Healing music helps! That's in their souls, too! "No one gets a free ride here"! Best wishes, don't lose hope! Keep the faith, no matter what your personal religious beliefs may be!

[@mitch5222]

@@brendadrew834 thanks. At least you are honest. Lots of ppl for example saying not afraid of getting old age but looking videos just like that. I just dont see myself happy in anyway. Nothing interest me. I am tired what ppl have to go through lots of problems in life. And i dont see how can i be happy when old. Isnt old age more complicated? More health problems, closer to death, etc. .. i just cant stand this life really, i tried everything to come from my depression, but i see living not enjoyable in any way possible. Everyday wake up to go to work and trying to keep busy to forget how dangerous this life is. I am just not made for this world and i know i should grow up. I just dont know. I just dont know how ppl can make it and i dont.

[@Yo-n2751]

We love good looking people so much Just imagine a person's funeral. He's lying in his grave but it's just his body. He's gone forever. What's left is just his body that the world adored so much. Damn it gives me chills

[@southernarts4443]

She hit the nail on the head with the fear of invisibility. I'm a photographer that started out as a model. I get invited to shoots still, but not as a model. I'm relegated to a position BEHIND the camera, capturing the beauty of other people instead of having a photographer capture MY attractiveness. That bothers me to no end.

[@sebentilezanini1085]

It's about time the world sees more modeling agencies that focus on only the seniors.....that'd be so great!!!

[@superfreakmusic7681]

But somehow you're expected to laugh it off and say that it doesnt bother you. Just because SOME people arent bothered by it, doesnt mean that everyone isnt, but somehow because a minority think ageing is wonderful, the rest of us are expected to go along with it and get judged and criticised if we dare speak up and tell the truth about how we really feel about it

[@jimsimpson1006]

Only two things you can be sure of in this life. 1. Some morning you will wake up and see an oldie in the mirror. 2. That day is not as far away as you think. BTW a lovely woman and brilliant and important talk.

[@josephphotiboi4681]

Thanks. Made me feel much better😕

[@CandiceNitschke]

Most uplifting, cheers! 😏

[@lisengel2498]

Its all about the feeling of purpose and celebration of aliveness - life is multidimensional and you have to live with a purpose of giving yourself to life and joy of life -

[@nandananda8059]

this speaks to me so much. I'm gonna be 32 this year, sometimes I'm so concerned when I'm thinking about aging, the reality where you might get so weak that you become so dependable to others and vulnerable, I dunno, but thanks for the beautiful word.

[@graceliljeblom1436]

At 72 I was not enlightened or uplifted by this video. However, your comment is exactly where my spirit is!

[@soulmutiny4411]

I think getting old is a fine thing.

[@bluejackscanada]

Ahhh. I hope to lie to my self as well, but myself does not believe me. How do you believe the lie?

[@laspilly]

bluejackscanada sad that you think it's a lie.

[@gurpreet7970]

So many r not lucky enough to enjoy ripe age

[@karenkaren3189]

Me too.

[@mjohnson1741]

@@bluejackscanada When you believe it is true an actually feel it then the lie is defeated.

[@susan9188]

Once my actual Birthday day has gone I don't even think how old I am. I still feel and act about 25 even though I'm 68. I dress smartly and always put make up on when I go out, not for other people but to make myself feel good. I just use Nivea cream. None of these face serums or moisturisers work, it's just a big con. You cannot stop getting old and even if you have face lifts, eye lifts etc you can still tell how old you are by your hands. Grow old gracefully is the best thing. As long as I can still get out and about I'm happy. You can't stop the hands of time. It's personality that matters, nothing else. Wisdom also comes with age, if it doesn't you've lived a very sheltered life. My thought is if only we knew what we know now when we we're younger we wouldn't have made any mistakes in life haha.

[@grapiken7766]

Because the patriarchy dismisses women over the age of fertility and our culture is obsessed with youth and beauty.

[@websurfin2010]

+Gra Piken It's not limited to women, you know?

[@grapiken7766]

websurfin2010 I realise... But it's mostly directed towards women. Watch television tonight and see how many make up, skin cream and anti ageing products adverts are aimed at men. Advertising is saturated with the message that women need to keep looking young.

[@bluejackscanada]

LOL! Every culture values fertility and youth and symmetry. It's actually more nature than society. Men are conditioned by nature to go after the young eggs. Society can try to change this, however trying to fight nature is not a battle you can win.

[@bluejackscanada]

Why do night clubs have a "ladies night" and not a "men's night", why can girls play on boys hockey teams, but boys cannot play on girls hockey teams? Why when the ship goes down its "women and children first?" Why is almost all pornography viewed by men? Men biologically are attracted to the visual, while women tend to be attracted emotionally and to resources. Hunter gatherer societies shaped human being long before there were marketing agencies. Your attempting to fight NATURE.

[@grapiken7766]

bluejackscanada Those examples you cited are examples of discrimination against men and you should shout it out. We are not solely animals any more. We have human intellect too. That's why a brain surgeon can be a woman and a hairdresser be a man.

[@opheliagrove666]

Society is quick to judge and dismiss people as old and 'past it' .

[@womenwithpower]

Great advice: meditate for peace of mind and self love, capacity to smile. "I am never lonely although I live alone" Great woman with power. Thank you!

[@europa1387]

Good talk. I'm 34 and going bald, it's is taking over my life worrying about it and really tiring me out. I need to accept it, but it is hard.

[@undercoverhamster2549]

God bless you

[@superfreakmusic7681]

I guess youve tried things like Manual?

[@raftal08]

thanks so much for a powerful thoughtful courageous talk , we tend to fall in the pitfalls we unconsciously created

[@desertrosedesertrose8696]

very beautiful woman. .inside and outside

[@shanenelson3863]

No she's hot af.

[@undercoverhamster2549]

@@shanenelson3863 LOL!

[@circumcizednun1814]

@@shanenelson3863 no for real!

[@Ruby_V_]

I love this woman's talks.

[@Burps___]

It's odd...we all have some trepidation about getting older, yet if a genie offered that we could go back to 1st grade and do it all over again, few of us would do it. :-)

[@bluejackscanada]

Yeah, not like real life! After a long season of NFL, NBA, NHL, the last things fans want to do is endure ANOTHER SEASON of football , Hockey, Basketball, after they already watched a LONG season of it!!! This was Sarcasm if you couldn't figure that out.

[@undercoverhamster2549]

@I'mRichAndSkinny Yeah, I think I would too but i'd make out I was a child prodigy or freak so that I wouldn't have to go to school!

[@mitch5222]

What about the looks. I am afraid i wont find my partner atractive.

[@-simplicity7551]

True, what a downgrade that would be. We didn't struggle through all the hard times just to do it over. I never want to take my exams over again

[@acajudi100]

I am 74, and getting old beats death for the moment. Many who died, wished they could have lived to be old. Some are killed before birth.

[@mz.dfwm107noneyurbusiness6]

acajudi100 do you mean abortion?

[@grannygoes7882]

I just turned 60 and I totally agree! At least my mother let me live and I've had a wonderful life and my death is ever before me. It's good to be aware that your days are numbered. It helps you make the most of them. NO ONE is promised tomorrow! Have you looked at pictures of the Saints? Often they have a skull close by. Skulls aren't just for Goths or Hells Angels, they are good for everyone. Ash to Ash, dust to dust......for everyone!

[@Lisa_Evers]

.... and many who are suffering in life, wish they could be dead. Life is not necessarily better than death. Everyone has their own perspective.

[@realrosesforever3847]

Getting older is a fact of life. Everyone gets the chance to be young and those young now, if they live long enough will get old - fact. No one escapes it. So, we just have accept it graciously, take the best care of ourselves that we can and enjoy the ride while doing our best to prepare and get ready for the journey into elderlyville and once we get their keep living and enjoying life as we have it the best we can. Oh, and be thankful that we've made it thus far.

[@lunafringe10]

some? Millions. Liberitarians destroy life before its time

[@hoffmancapote]

Lovely speech. A lot of wisdom for people of all ages to consider and use if you develop the strategy to become strong and use it

[@scaoticvlogs7238]

Brothers and Sisters work not too hard on our image, but instead work on a deeper understanding of our characteristics,sharpen to enlighten our moods & energy, also work on personal insecurities to let go of our past .

[@tina74166]

Wonderful! Best comment yet. Still scrolling. Yes, I feel our 'Mental' Health is most important. Growing/evolving never ends while we're still here because we've lived longer and our ideas about everything do change also. It's also a lot of work to leave our past in the past, if we feel empty inside/not really living alive~ sometimes we tend to keep reliving all the memories, especially when we no longer have as many goals towards the future. But, if we've witnessed these things happening in our life- that our thoughts do create our reality, than it's much easier to change the thinking/thoughts that are not making us feel good. It seems as we get more 'seasoned' in life (I've come to like that word better than senior or elder😊) on releasing Fear and giving ourselves as much Self-love as possible really works. It's so much easier to see others and also the world, in a much better light & spread more love~ When fear turns into love. This is a daily practice in my own life. It's not always easy to get it right, but what we 'think' about (Mostly focus on--good/positive or bad/negative) we do get more of. Our thinking will definitely affect how our outer world looks and feels to us. And if we can make a daily list of whatever is working right in our life, (simple things we get enjoyment from) 'Gratitude" can be a game changer. Let's choose to FEEL good right where we are, and whatever age we may be! Love & blessings to all ~💗🙏💞

[@lisaFreeman5679]

People fear aging because, they won't be young anymore, they will ba old and fall apart, and you have to be happy about it !!!

[@lunantix]

I'm afraid of excitement and the future of my life ending, I don't want it to end, I want to have the future always ahead of me.

[@heathermarykell3063]

Thank you Going grey is very liberating as it knowing we have a purpose and our time here on earth 🌏 is very very short Make it count

[@shanze5591]

I’m 50+, I take care of myself for myself..... I’ve never cared what others think.... I’ve never cared about being a certain image of being seen in the world. So there are a lot of confident strong women who take care of themselves for themselves not to portray a certain image in the community

[@laurenharper2789]

Love this!

[@cellardoor6016]

Im gonna cry right now..I am not handling it very well

[@gailcrowe727]

You don’t need to look younger just look the best you can for you’re age.

[@wisemanwalkingdowntheroad4275]

There is no upside to getting old other than maybe you've gained wisdom with age but who out here who is in the latter part of life who hasn't wish they had that knowledge and wisdom back when they were young? I certainly wish I did and avoided a host of mistakes and bad decisions that I can't take back now. Also I think depends on how well your life worked out affects how you feel. If your life has had a lot of hard knocks, bad decisions and lack of prosperity being cheerful as you get older becomes a lot harder.

[@Narutoonepiecefan3]

You should look up and read into Aubrey De Grey and SENS Foundation. This is exactly what I'm fighting for right here.

[@formerfundienowfree4235]

That's why the love has to come from inside.

[@bizznick444joe7]

I just wish I had the internet when I was younger

[@risateealtrerisate]

Great useful speech and also beautifully delivered, I agree on every thing you said ! Thank You Scilla ✨

[@xPumpkinWitchx]

Im 25 soon to be 26 in Feb 2018, Ever since childhood i have feared getting older. When i have aged people have expected me to change myself to not like the things i do. For example I love watching cartoons and anime, I'd love to wear childish clothing and play games and play with toys like a child does. I know to others this sounds probably very strange but i feel it's who i am. Other people's opinions of what i should be at my age scares me, I get dismissed and abandoned by people because I'm too weird for them. I don't have friends and i don't think i ever have, I have my own apartment and i basically live like how very old people live, I don't exist to anyone and im afraid to die alone.

[@aestaeticedits7998]

Hey I’m only 19 but I get you. I got into anime when I was 14 and since then the shoujo genre has always been one of my favorites. I love cutesy girly anime just as much as I did back then or maybe even more now. I love all genres though as long as the anime interests me. Anyways my point is, shoujo anime is more for girls who are like 8-18 years old but I don’t care. I love it and that’s all that matters. If this helps, live for yourself and yourself only, not how society expects you to live. And about fashion, sometimes I might dress my age and sometimes I might dress like I’m 13. If anyone tells I’m weird, I’ll just tell them to love themselves (no one has ever said anything to me tho). But you do you, just live your life the way you see fits best for you. Age is literally nothing but a number anyways, I wish people would wake up and realize that a number should have nothing to do with your interests or the way you should live.

[@rebeccasteinbach3117]

SAME

[@aniestef.f]

It sounds like you need to re-connect with your inner child. Watch John Bradshaw's talks... he made a lot of good content talking about this of healing the inner child wound.

[@RababaInc]

same

[@melina_ssxx788]

Lots of people are very superficial and when you get old they call you ugly and give you the feeling you are not attractive anymore and that you have no value. They dont like to look at you because you are not pretty anymore. Pretty and attractive people have an easier life i guess. They get more attention and they get the feeling that they are more loved.

[@oo0sofia0oo]

Melina Dzjj6 but even them will get old and die...

[@wayneelliott1180]

I always remember that I know so much more than they do.

[@debbieharriman1194]

ur right melina,and it's not going to get better.

[@Narutoonepiecefan3]

It can and will get better, look up Aubrey De Grey and SENS Foundation.

[@Narutoonepiecefan3]

Look Up Aubrey De Grey and Sens Foundation, this is the type of thing people like you need to fight for.

[@gypsytears1785]

I fear my husband not wanting me anymore. Beauty is awesome but youth always wins when it comes to attractiveness. And maybe it’s also pstd from my husband also having inappropriate relationships with younger women at work.

[@nancyoconnor4420]

Remember he's getting old too.

[@LookItsJustCharlie]

I’m 24 and freaking out already.😂 This woman has soothed me though, beautiful words!❤️

[@ankitachakraborty3524]

I am just 20. And I am already freaking out. :)

[@rymc3437]

Im scared since i was 16 lmao, now i just try to accept the reality. And there is also so much to learn when you getting old. I think its not thats bad

[@josephphotiboi4681]

I'm 13 and freaking out

[@zz7007]

I totally know how you feel. I’m 10 years old and freaking out about how old I’m getting.

[@UnitedThrive]

@@zz7007 Really your 10 your good

[@joelbackman8330]

Beauty is what makes me hate aging. Looking at old photos of girls who once were so beautiful they could make your heart stop, but who lost it as they lost their youth. At the same time, though, since our time here is counted, it makes it more precious to us. That ain't a bad thing, but it does not make up for the downsides.

[@sarablakey9445]

Then you don’t get it yet. Nothing is lost. There is beauty in withered hands, beauty in wrinkled, care worn faces because life is so short, fragile and fraught with struggle and danger. None of us ever get enough time and the currency of youth is fleeting. But, those of us who made it into existence are the fortunate ones. Regret is useless, savor every wrinkle and gray hair!

[@tjmulligan]

“There is no greater illusion than fear, no greater wrong than preparing to defend yourself, no greater misfortune than having an enemy. Whoever can see through all fear will always be safe” ― Lao Tze in Tao te Ching

[@fruitfullane9805]

It is not bad to age...what is bad is the attitude of the younger to feel entitled to abuse the older

[@missadda8890]

Don't freak in the future I am 60 and I take it one day at a time everything in moderation and realize everyone you see is going through something so be kind and understanding .Life is short.

[@keepaneyeonspring6328]

Vibrancy and energy is important.

[@1111cristinaa]

i wish she was my grandmother shes so cute i love her and i feel she gives the best advice

[@skiliminy]

Such a great talk and an even more amazing woman!

[@hai21iko]

I am afraid to look in the mirror as an old man and regret how i lived my life. - I am 17 :/

[@SmashGamerHD]

Same

[@mysu3777]

YOLOOOO

[@spongebob8157]

I think about being in my grave, being 80, I am 16 😐

[@Bitrey]

Exactly the same for me :/

[@Tvtardy]

@@spongebob8157 same but 13

[@user-sv4vi2iw4g]

The fear of Going gray and getting wrinkles is so big inside of me. Like i am terrified so much that death seems less scary than becoming old..

[@Hottica82]

I feel scared to be old because I know I will be lonely, never met a man who truly loved me I was married 10 years but it was an abusive relationship. I noticed that men just want young girls like the ones on Instagram, sucks

[@LadyGTarot]

I am formally 70 today -- Am formally considered old today. I am ok with it all as I am not trying to attract anyone and only being happy with my self. Life is always interesting. 70? Really ? The body might have come to that age but my spirit feels no such thing.

[@mitch5222]

Thanks. I am scared of getting old.

[@naturelover1284]

Youth is easily taken advantage of, and they like you that way. You can't blame people though for seeing aging people and not wanting to be as them. There is a lot to learn that way also. If someone is grouchy and pessimistic, or they went along with culture and now show those scars and habits...it is healthy to rebel against that.

[@mathstar4176]

Just her accent is wonderful, she is so special.

[@debbieharriman7415]

well im not afraid of getting older. and dont care if people like me or not. I love myself and enjoy life to the fullest.

[@lillyann2818]

Hi Debbie, that's great. According to my research, some people naturally feel pain when they are not fully included in the workplace by younger colleagues and managers, even though they are still full of initiative, ideas and work ethic. There is an idea in some younger minds that there is not any valuable or interesting work/ creativity/ idea-stream in an older-looking person. This is the idea that has to change, so that everyone can continue to be useful and to contribute. Contributing and being included are essential for many, in order to feel happy. Societal attitudes I would like to see (after my research so far): Don't exclude people on the basis of a wrinkly face etc. Take time to get to know people and see what they have to offer.

[@debbieharriman7415]

+Lilly Ann thank u lilly ann u are so right

[@lillyann2818]

Cheers! In the meantime, you've got the right idea: Live life to the fullest! All power to you =)

[@mitch5222]

I envy you but happy for you. I tried to accept it but reality hit me a lot.

[@revsararobin]

This is beautiful!! Thank You!!!🙏💕

[@zz7007]

I’m four years old and scared shitless of growing old!

[@evanhalsey1844]

I'm 36 and I look forward to getting older every day. I'll be 40 in less than 4 years, and I actually look forward to it. There's no past for me and I'd never want to be a kid again. I have autism spectrum disorders and I feel comfortable facing life's transitions and aging. I don't want anything or anyone to get in my way because the good things people do are worse than life itself. I want to just keep aging successfully and experiencing life's transitions on my own terms. Whatever happens with age, I'll be proud it happens even though it isn't always easy. Even death doesn't scare me.

[@bizznick444joe7]

You're like me I'm 35 years old and I am autistic. I do believe my autism held me back in my younger years though.

[@mitch5222]

I didnt understand. Good things ppl do are worse than life itself? Why death doesnt scare you? Thanks

[@evanhalsey1844]

I mean, I totally want my life to be the result of my own work despite that I have Asperger's, and everybody wants to help when they can but when I don't need it. Since I have it it's no big deal what happens in life. The only fear is not succeeding, but that's usually caused by others because they think they know what you need or can't do when you have a disability. Charity is awful when you have a condition you can't control because it reduces you from your status of personhood. I'd much rather embark on an uncertain future, live life without the plan, determine life as I go, pursue my own interests, make mistakes and eventually die than rely on others, play it safe and live forever. What others think you should be doing and what they do in response is never needed and doesn't tell me anything or help me in any way. The reason I don't like other's efforts is because they keep you dependent and take away your autonomy. Life is too short for that. Once I've done everything I want to do in life, made many memories, done what I was meant to do, why should I be afraid of death when it comes time? Getting old and not being able to do anything anymore and moving into a nursing home is way scarier than death.

[@mitch5222]

@@evanhalsey1844 i understand. But we always say so but when time comes we are scared. Honestly i am scared of old age and even life to me is scary. I know ill be alone for the rest of my life. I just dont see life enjoyable. I admire u and wish u all the best. Next time reply to my comment so i get notification.

[@angieburgos5856]

In my opinion about getting older is that we shouldn't forget ourselves to do the best to treat ourselves to buy natural cosmetics, skin care and using color for your hair. We not to overspend but if we can do at least something more about our image it will help in ways at us.

[@Oraklet_v]

Beautiful. Thank you.

[@meaghenstandlee6644]

I'm turning 33 ,single, unmarried, no kids and feel 60 look 25 and lost in the world without a career or a path checking my face daily looking for signs of aging thx for your video 💜

[@mitch5222]

Same. How do u cope with it and anxiety?

[@annemarierandon9427]

I agree with Scilla, I work at a retirement home and the love they give to seniors is nowhere near the love of a spouse or close family member.

[@Sirius13jhp]

cant stop listening this TED talk, so much valuable and the message is just great..

[@brokenvessel6380]

I think you are very smart for your age, and I'm proud of you Potato Eater , don't worry Youre not the only one who has questioned their belief in God. Whatever needs to be done or revealed in your life, for you will.." But the greatest of these things is Love" and you have that for your family..So you are on the right track! Stay as wonderful as you are, and keep loving your siblings, and family...

[@lynnmarieanderson1744]

I think this woman is very beautiful, elegant, well-spoken and has a lot of class. I'm getting alarmed at seeing all these new assisted living places springing up around where I live in Michigan. It seems to me that some of the staff these places hire are really better suited to work at Burger King than have much caring or sensitivity for frail seniors with dementia.

[@maggiewood4332]

i think she is stunning as well

[@TheSpanishNotebook]

It's not about image or appearance, that's not the most important thing unless you're superficial and shallow. People get upset about that because it tells you of your age and that time is running out. You get closer to death. Why wouldn't you be afraid? If you have kids or nephews/nieces or any kids around or related, their future is thriving and blooming into a young person with a whole future. While we wither away and slowly disappear. And the older you get, the older everyone you love gets. The older you get, those you love do too (especially those much older). The more chances of losing a sibling, your parents (mum in my case, as my dad died already when I was 26), a friend or your life partner. That's not something I look forward to.

[@mitch5222]

How to get rid of that superficials and shalowness? I am scared i wont find my partner atractive. I have been always picky about the looks and i am ashamed.

[@lemostjoyousrenegade]

@@mitch5222 You could lose your vision before they lose their looks. I hope you don't but...I doubt you'd be picky about having a kind, loving, devoted mate/companion by your side to who is truly a help mate. Wishing (and your mate) you the best.

[@mitch5222]

@@lemostjoyousrenegade thanks

[@superfreakmusic7681]

Actually most people do worry about their looks because we're simply hard wired to do that, but it deosnt make them superficial, selfish or shallow. I think thats a myth perpetuated by Hollywood who portrays anyone who wants to look young as the most morally bankrupt people on earth (while of course demanding that actresses remain young and beautiful) Looks arent everything, but somehow if you dont like how you look it can really knock your confidence and self esteem-just look at any plastic surgery website. Its a normal human thing to feel that way.

[@superfreakmusic7681]

Mark Carney (former Governor of the Bank and Canada and the Bank of England) is good looking, knows it and has admitted to using it to his advantage. But he is also an eco warrior and is leading the financial industry in a greener direction. Also many actors and models like looking good but are also philanthropists and eco warriors. Caring about your looks does not automatically make you shallow.

[@OddWomanOut_Pi81]

"We're obsessed with SPEED...& ECONOMIC GROWTH...& YOUTH..."

[@zdravkasoskic3169]

For me getting older and retired now means being happy in being "invisible" at first sight, being free to focus on the inner self....being honest at all times and being myself, finally

[@freedomwarrior5087]

We are all individuals and you seem to take that individual spirit and project it into a collective view of your own opinions.

[@ah-dn7mt]

This gave me chills.

[@hemapalanhrtrainer3050]

It is the attitude that matters. If you think that you are old, you are old.If you think you are young, you are young. Iam 71 years old but I am very active in all respects. It is not the fear of death but fear of alienation is the concern of old people

[@dynamicdiana333]

Wonderful!!

[@romlyn99]

the pressure to look younger is a struggle mainly for women - especially for products and advertising. But me have some of that pressure... just not as much as women.

[@sirjones1]

I am 21 ..I came here to prepare for what must happen

[@lovebythemoon5230]

Omgoodness! Bravo Thank you

[@jazmckenzie]

Good talk but my view is different. People can have happy, fulfilling lives, have dyed hair, face lifts etc. It's not either/or as we are individuals. When you are happy and comfortable with yourself you can be how you choose at any age. I don't understand why growing old gracefully implies no hair dye etc. Just look your best in your eyes and do your part, whatever your calling is.

[@MrsSudsawat]

She is great.

[@deboradavidson9123]

Wow! Such words of insight and modern day wisdom

[@karina4649]

To my mind this talk should be called something like the advantages of growing older - the gifts of those who are not afraid to grow older - the wisdom of growing older - this is a wonderful talk and it's title really doesn't do it justice.

[@zes3813]

it does not require courage and is not about daring or not, idts. and not afraid

[@growden100]

I don't think aging would be so scary if Alzheimer's and dementia didn't exist. Look at all the old people running congress. Many are still sharp.

[@MyHelga1]

Genevieve Baldwin Well, I would have to disagree on that statement. The radical far left are losing their minds and it’s not even rational what they are saying. I was a liberal till I couldn’t turn on my TV anymore without hearing the word impeachment constantly for no wrong doing. It’s like a mob mentally and it makes me feel unsafe and afraid of what they would do to all the sick or elderly people in our country. I am now thinking being a conservative is more healthy and be kind to others. I know I am a bit off track here, but these people are fueled by hate over a single man running our country. Is he perfect? Absolutely not, but he isn’t stealing billions of dollars like the son of Joe Biden. We have many people in congress who have sensible minds and do what is best for our country. What they put our Supreme Court Judge, Brett Kavanaugh through was absolutely disgraceful. I am a 66 year old woman who still has lots to offer society, my children and grandchildren.. I am going to take myself to the voting booth and change my affiliation to that of a Republican and vote for president Trump in the 2020 election. God Bless America.

[@lunafringe10]

who is sharp in congress? Sharp abt making money

[@yoursubconscious]

No offense, I am happy I am “multitasking” right now. Because her sweet voice could put me to sleep, she speaks so softly and kindly.

[@blorkpovud1576]

I'm a Johnny-come-lately but this was extremely powerful.

[@lilliangray3651]

Thank you for the heart to heart talk.

[@ernestmac13]

Only 10% of people end up in some form of care facility, and those who have elevated blood pressure,melodic sugar,many cholesterol in their 40s and 50s, are those who tend to have the health crisis in their 60s and 70s, that puts them into a convalescent home or other facility. My father is just an example, even though his two brothers who had developed diabetes, and one having heart issues, and then strokes, and the other possibly having a stroke, my father made no lifestyle changes. At 64, my father had his first stroke, which I think is linked to the fact he had high blood pressure beginning at the age of 48, and being about 80lbs over weight. I entered boot camp at 18 at 200 lbs, and dropped to 129 by the time I completed boot camp. I was only in the reserves for six years, so I quickly returned to the bad habits of my family, and others around me, and after almost 20 years, was close to my original weight. I allowed, life, taking care of ill family members, etc, to blind me to the truth, till I Saw a photo of myself at a party one day, and saw how fat I had become. I have dropped from 190lbs down to 165, but need to loose 30 more lbs. I look back at photos of myself in my 30s and 40s and shudder, as I look at the fat around my gut and neck. The point if this woman's talk is, many of us either do nothing, till we are lucky enough to have survived a major health crisis, or never do nothing because, we go for the quick cause tic fixes of cause tic surgeries, that lift our faces and tuck our tummies, but do nothing to improve our overall health. I have an aunt who could pass for 60, who is approaching 90 because, she walks two miles in the hills where she lives. I have started climbing the stairs at the parking garage near the business district in my town, and once weather is nicer, I will add jogging. I have gone from a men's 36 to a men's 33 jeans, and will soon fit into a 32 pear of jeans. I still need to work on the diet, and consistency, but I know the hard work can help keep me from having strokes, when I could still have a vital life. In many states, like California, there is something called an advanced directive, in which you can spell out that, if your condition is such that, you need any sort of artificial care, like feeding tubes, breathing assistance, or even CPR should you stop breathing or your heart stop, to not utilize such care or life saving procedures. I know, as I have had to make this life and death choice for three four family members, two of whom were still in their 40s, at the time of their passing. You also need to assign someone power of attorney, including over medical decisions, so if as in one woman's case, if they try to convince your adult child that you have pneumonia and, there is nothing they can do, your person with power of attorney can insist on tests to rule out other infections, even if they are expensive, and insurance may not cover them, this lady lived ten more years due to her daughter's insistence, that DR.s perform the test. I have seen people who are 60, who dress and act like they are 90, and people who are 90, who still have spring in their step. Be aware, a major source of falls for older people is pets. So, do hate on this women for point out that, we need to take some responsibility, and not put all the blame on the medical industry. She also says, Western medicine needs to change its mentality as well. Preventative care could help people live longer and healthier lives, we eat to much, and too much of just unhealthy food in addition to that, we drink too much sugary drinks, too much alcohol, smoke still to much as any is too much, and don't exercise. Sadly, minorities get it worse hear as, not only do many minorities suffer economically, the alcohol and tobacco industries target every minority from Asians to Gays, which is why we're higher rates of smoking amongst these minority groups. The alcohol/beer companies often spencer festivals, parades, etc, while the owners of some of these companies push for legislation against minority groups. Don't shoot the messenger.

[@redtoplanding5160]

Love saves it all in the end...waves lengthen

[@reubenmusyoka3192]

Ms Scilla Elworthy sounds like she's having a one on one with me. Thank you ma'am.

[@mollypinto4666]

Beautiful 🙏Just like you💗

[@mathstar4176]

We are the generation who have all the cool culture, dig it up, look at the Rolling Stones, can't help but love them.

[@soshilevi]

I'm 23 and I'm already overthinking and panicking

[@simhadrieswarachari4739]

Same😂😂

[@Corrans]

I love the idea of Global Elders

[@Eadyt87]

When she said "every day western media" well here i am in Asia, in here too everybody WANTS to looks YOUNGER, its a NATURAL things for us humn to wanting to looks younger since it means sign of fitness and healthy amd attractiveness. Please dont blindly blaming everything to media