When your child comes out | Reuben Kaye | TEDxCurrumbin

After appearances on ABC, Channel 4 and BBC’s You’re Fired, multi-award winning, Australian comedian, singer and self proclaimed part-time hood ornament Reuben Kaye is the danger man to watch. With an acid wit and casual sensationalism, Kaye is fast, on the edge and brutally funny. A dazzling phantasm of anachronistic showbiz - an explosion of sequins, lashes and teeth, a much needed, hysterically funny, swarovski studded revolt against the ever narrowing views of an increasingly conservative world. Reuben Kaye is what happens when you tell your children they can be anything.
This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at www.ted.com/tedx

[@farscape1076]

I could listen to Reuben talk for hours. So much truth and heart.

[@mattyd3079]

That 17 minutes went so fast. I was spellbound. I have to admit I didn't get half the jokes... one thing I will take away from this talk is that fathers matter. Beautiful sentiment and so true. A father's love and acceptance is needed. No need for explanation, no need for qualification. Thanks, Reuben, for sharing with us.

[@raz6630]

This is what happens when the moral fabric of society is neglected and replaced with pseudo-satanic diabolical narcissism and self-worship we have obvious paedophiles and the mentally unwell pandered to and encouraged to the demise of society and themselves.

[@mattyd3079]

@@raz6630 You sure you replied to the right comment? You have opinions and i respect them. And I don’t necessarily disagree with them either - in the right context. I do understand where you are coming from. In my comment I simply tried to see the positive in what was being said.

[@EthanKristopherHartley]

​@@mattyd3079 I can't see what Raz said, but maybe I can offer another couple of things to consider. "Matter" is a little imprecise for this sort of conversation. It could mean "have an impact" or "is important/vital" (which is the impression I get from your answer). "A Father's love and acceptance is needed". Is a beautiful sentiment. But in my experience queer folk who have the love and acceptance of blood family remain (sadly) in the minority. My advice to anyone when listening to a coming out story - especially when presented by a talented orator or storyteller - is to listen to the facts. The emotional side is usually one sided or speculation. But it's almost definitely been pruned and shaped to "fit" the story. Listen to the facts. Empathise with the emotion. And thank the person for sharing. But I don't think any queer person would be able to agree that any blood family member matters simply because they share a few chromosomes! 😁 LGBTQIA+ folk have had to fudge the Family definition a little, but it's given us hugely welcoming round of "chosen family" and each & everyone a family for Christmas. ❤️

[@dtg5909]

Now there’s an orator. He’s just amazing. ❤

[@fionasedgwick7424]

What a fabulous speaker. Such a colourful storyteller who has a lot to say. I love you, Reuben!

[@Ninang363]

My Dad did not understand or like that I was Trans. I came out at 19 (1982). Our relationship was never easy. He eventually paid for my SRS because he knew it was the right thing for me even if he could not understand it. Not bad for a WW II Vet who adopted a kid. Coming out stories are always so personal and amazing...and there are far more of them than we realize. Thank you for that.

[@raz6630]

This is what happens when the moral fabric of society is neglected and replaced with pseudo-satanic diabolical narcissism and self-worship we have obvious paedophiles and the mentally unwell pandered to and encouraged to the demise of society and themselves.

[@Ninang363]

Actually, for me, this is what happened when I received love and understanding. I show up for work every day and save American lives. Do not lecture me about morals. I got my morals and my ethics in check. Maybe you should learn what compassion and empathy are. From your response though I suspect you are a MAGAt. Cruelty for MAGAts IS the point.

[@pcole1232]

Wonderful speaker,very articulate. Words of wisdom.

[@orcamentometallima1345]

no way.

[@cazzdesilva6280]

Oh wow. Listening to this man, I’m sobbing. I’m spellbound by his voice, truth, honestly, and humanity. Thank you Ruben. Stay strong and safe. Xx

[@billzero7274]

I am sorry for the sadness, pain and shame you felt! Happy to know you made it through all those years and are now a happy and proud member of our community ❤❤❤

[@handsomeguy2993]

You made me laugh, you made me cry but most of all you made me understand. I appreciate your very existence. Thank you and can’t wait till you tour the states.

[@NKelso]

I love you Reuben - thank you for sharing your experiences and vision with the world! You’re wonderful! ❤️

[@BrunoDermoumWeb]

This is a beautiful explanation for coming out. Yes we all know where we were when we did it, who we were with, what the reaction was. Very powerful presentation !

[@justincapp4]

What an utterly amazing speech, straight from the heart with flawless delivery, charm and intellect. Inspiring and enlightening, thank you so much for your beautiful insight and humanity. Bravo Reuben you are incredible.

[@SarahColeman-mo2dw]

Oh it does. I remember that day forever

[@douglaslay3100]

THIS PERSON IS BRILLIANT. I could write a novel, but I am beyond moved. Thank you Reuben Kaye

[@feekett8271]

Hail to the king / queen I nearly started crying because you could feel the pain and you just want to make you stop hurting x Sending my love to everyone who ever had to experience anything like this. You are loved trust me !

[@valentincolon7600]

Wow 😊 Thank You for this. I’ve recently discovered you Reuben and I’m glad to be able to see and hear you on KZbin. This was so on the money. I hope more people see and hear what you have to say. Many blessing to you. Thank You

[@888bjxjs888]

Stunning. Thank you for such a powerful lesson. Glad you exist in the world, Reuben.

[@daleogborn5520]

My coming out Story is I showed up in upstate NY with my lover at time we were doing very well financially.. I was 6 ft 180 former military policeman now I was working in hotels and restaurants and was a chef.. no one ever said a crossword to me we had a great time they accepted Steven what they said behind our backs I do not know & don't care ..that was in 99 .. Steven is gone now And so is my parents... The last 4 years of my mother's life was great our relationship was great we talked on the phone and said I love you after each call or mistakes were forgiven 🙏♥️

[@_brain_junkie]

I adore this man. I think it’s a courageous thing to do, to share your deeply personal experiences to better inform others. Reuben is inspirational, and I know that you hear that word thrown around a lot these days, but I don’t use it very often. I’m waiting for a book next!

[@dawnkoplitz1825]

You’re such an eloquent speaker. Thank you for all the LGBTQ children you’ve helped by speaking your truth! 🤟🏻

[@raz6630]

This is what happens when the moral fabric of society is neglected and replaced with pseudo-satanic diabolical narcissism and self-worship we have obvious paedophiles and the mentally unwell pandered to and encouraged to the demise of society and themselves.

[@SRTyler392]

Ah yes, talking about Italians being inside of you is such an inspiration to young children everywhere 🤦🏻‍♂️ you people are sick weirdos

[@noelgonzalez9549]

Everyone needs to watch this.

[@olivialewishussey]

You are amazing. Im a 42 year old woman and I want to be you when I grow up!!!!

[@that1monk]

Thank you for the riveting speech by an intelligent and resilient mind. ❤🏳‍🌈🙏🎉

[@Charmien]

I became a fan a few years ago but I’ve never written that hey, I think you have a wonderful aura and it’s very obvious you were born to be an entertainer. Keep being you!

[@iamaloha2]

What an outstanding motivation speaker. The very best.

[@HimanshuSharma-oy9ss]

Beautiful, emotional and compelling.

[@scattysafari7742]

Apparently he was a huge inspiration for Neil Newborn's interpretation of Astarion in Baldur's gate 3. I can see it.

[@LukeShepperd]

This is so incredibly powerful ❤️ thank you Reuben xx

[@TenaciousDmitchell]

RK you rock! Love your perseverance and confidence.

[@aoife3571]

Brilliant, brave, hilarious, and an extraordinary human being.Thank you Reuben.

[@die_vegane_hebamme]

Thank you ❤️

[@SonjaDawn]

Thank you. I'm glad I watched!

[@Ummm563]

And after all that, what a beautiful person. Thank you.

[@Beautyinthechaos2004]

Thank you for sharing your story 💚💚

[@MrKirby365]

I was definitely called a f***ot before I knew what it was and what I was

[@rlr126]

Thank you for sharing your message! Keep being amazing and wonderful YOU!

[@warawath]

thank you

[@NiahmBrowne]

That was very moving x

[@nicholascollison3611]

Brilliant ❤

[@MellaBella1980]

I am 41 and still haven’t come out to my family and a lot of my friends!

[@janettegloury3834]

And the idea that your friends & family very first reaction can be so powerful, whatever happens next must be terrible. But (easy for me I don't have to do it) think of the relief & strength you may feel when it's done. All good wishes to you

[@michaelchailland3616]

BRAVO! Well said, well said.

[@pasjasolarazumetipsaalenka8998]

🥰🥰🥰 captivating humorous and so so real

[@andrewaway]

Wow. Thank you. ❤

[@onesunnyday5699]

I love him even more after this 🥰😍💖

[@hannamuller515]

Beautiful👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻

[@BERTONI704]

Thank you Reuben Muchas gracias Felicidades por tu historia Yo te amor ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤

[@Lunaryo]

My eyes won't stop leaking. Absolute legend nailed it!

[@Gina_from_VA]

He is so meta!

[@matildewosnjuk7508]

Brave. Wish you luck in life.

[@thestagerocks]

If 1980's Berlin was a human with perfect bone structure...

[@ramickstudioproductions005]

Crying crying real hard now

[@nicholasweatherill5766]

The best Ted X I’ve heard. Atleast for me. Amazing and thoughtful I don’t need anymore

[@cookyline]

I love you Reuben ❤brilliant and brave!!!

[@vonlipi]

Reuben you are so very courageous. Love you to bits. I wish my Mom accepted my queerness

[@michaelrodriguez2773]

Reuben should've been Desire in The Sandman

[@jodiblackman7838]

This is wonderful. Thank you.

[@Sechaba00]

Wow ❤

[@penneycason9269]

My beloved came out to me about being trans. Well hello!?!! I responded by calling all support I could. 1994 surgery. I gained a sister. We have celebrated 36 Valentines together. Love love love ❤️

[@johnmccormick1061]

Excellent ❤️ beautifully said ⭐️🤩💙

[@ShivrajParshad]

❤

[@patjuskiw2418]

I remember my father's hands too. 😢

[@violetgreene4458]

he's a genuinely beautiful human.

[@Host_Bogart]

wow

[@pmurraymusic]

HEAR HEAR!!!

[@lazylemymaitland6996]

8:13 MATE, NO that feral man, god

[@njgrant3988]

We need batman

[@sheillaa.6964]

❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤

[@butterflygirl3359]

It’s interesting how he acknowledges the horrors of Communism but criticizes “this” federal government, the USA’s last defense against it.

[@momp57]

Every parent needs to hear this!

[@antonkolesnik6608]

Where is the giga pinguin

[@punksterpride8339]

What pronouns does Reuban go by? I googled it but couldn't find the info

[@SarahColeman-mo2dw]

Dang you’re looking good

[@arunamehta792]

You are human and god loves you. I know these words can't bring peace to your soul but trust me god will bring peace to your life and soul❤

[@dontbeabutt7786]

I f-ing love you Reuben Kaye

[@iestynovich]

Divine

[@4zul4_iwnl]

he smort

[@MoonlightNothing]

💔

[@nathanwright8616]

this is so funny

[@elisabethkanter]

This guy is a predator if you’ve seen his other work

[@onesunnyday5699]

Tough room. Nobody laughs 😬🙄

[@PatGeo95]

❤️🏳️‍🌈🇦🇺

[@paulsnow1289]

What a freak 🤣

[@KlausSchwab-cy3ob]

Reuben, stop saying you look like Cruella DeVille, you look like a groomed up version of the Joker

[@user-ju8ec1ru9h]

This is not God's doing.

[@carlonedelko7381]

Doesn't look.intimidating just looks tragically sad looking desperately for recognition.

[@SB-iy9vn]

if your child comes out you have failed as a parent

[@InfernoPhoenix123]

If ur child can't come out to you then you've failed as a parent

[@SB-iy9vn]

@@InfernoPhoenix123 nope it means you have one They will know and follow the truth

[@I-AM-SKYTRISS]

PERHAPS SOMEDAY SOMEONE WILL IDENTIFY AZ G O D,,,, MAKE UP THEIR OWN DED AZ CREATOR OV HEAVEN AND EARTH,,, SHOW DED OV OWNERSHIP.. AND TAKE OVER THIS INSANE WORLD ! JUST A THOUGHT

[@mariya4539]

Joker

[@patrickarky116]

They give Ted talks to any weirdo, these days!!!!!!!!!!

[@miroslav-mikhayeljuric-de3yp]

Nothing about him is respectable.

[@Iknowyeshuaisking]

Jesus is lord, Jesus is the most wonderful being that is, Jesus is excellent, wonderful and beautiful. I love Jesus, Jesus loves us too.

[@HaTer-xs8sh]

Ew. What is that thing

[@thegoddess1976]

You should post a picture of yourself .... so we can also judge

[@HaTer-xs8sh]

@@thegoddess1976 at least I’m not a freak

[@rolandmorrison8224]

Did you know that Tedx hosted an event by a woman named Mirjam Heine that stated that the P word is an actual orientation? Did you also know that many of us know, firsthand, that most of the lauded and praised manifestations of modern-day "orientation" are the actual product of the P word? Is it right to say that the damage is done, it is what it is...the ship has sailed....and "I am what I am--deal with it"? Is it right to think that way when P was the original cause for so many of these situations? Maybe that's why a certain community that is partially epitomized in this video just so happens to be more accepting of P than everyone else, since, they were the victims of it....usually. People say Tedx is for the intelligent and scholarly. Is that really the case?

[@marcz8625]

You felt the need to comment? But edited your comment and still doesn’t really make sense. What do you really want to say? Just say it and be authentic. Oh and if you have nothing good to say, say nothing. Like your mum would have explained at some stage.

[@stevenwren2784]

I'm struggling to think what the P-word is

[@_brain_junkie]

@@stevenwren2784 me too 🧐 I’m struggling with all of it to be honest, but I’m not that bothered about having broken down.

[@SB-xs8js]

I thought the same

[@dianemason9092]

Your finished

[@animalsome]

Cringe

[@animalsome]

@@dazednelectro Thank you for pointing out the obvious

[@matteomaserati2795]

Thank you ❤

[@knolcollis]

❤