The Babylon Bee Presents: Our 100% Accurate Predictions For 2024

The Babylon Bee has been known to accurately predict the future. We have a better batting average than Benny Hinn, Nostradamus, and your local weatherman combined. So sit back and relax as we tell you with 100% certainty everything that's going to happen in 2024.
Millions trust ‪@MyPatriotSupply‬ to prepare them for what’s coming. Prepare today and be ready for anything: Preparewithbee.com
#comedy #prepping #babylonbee

[@farmtutor2379]

Biden becomes the first female president after announcing his struggle to embrace his true identity. Sniffs his own hair.

[@casual454t1]

😂😂😂😂😂

[@Antler_addict]

Hey! shhsh!!!

[@thegizmologist8325]

LOL!

[@sues232]

Good one!

[@bills5009]

Does he become 1st female president retroactively or by winning 2024? Inquiring minds want to know.

[@MusicalGeniusBar]

Used to be a comedy channel, now it’s just a history channel

[@gigim.9742]

Meanwhile, the History Channel has long been a parody channel... of itself.

[@shaventalz3092]

The news of tomorrow - today!

[@richardmahn7589]

A future history channel!

[@richardmahn7589]

@@shaventalz3092 I bet if Early Edition was filmed now, Gary would just be hiding under his bed in disbelief and despair of not being able to fix everything...

[@rcstl8815]

Coming attractions, you mean?

[@rahn45]

"US sends 1 trillion dollars in aid to country most Americans can't find on a map." "US inexplicably prints 1 trillion dollars." "On an unrelated note, the price of gas skyrockets to 100 dollars per gallon; ushering a new surge of EV purchases." "Power grid collapses for unknown reasons."

[@pete531]

haahahahahhahaahhaa "unknown reasons"

[@randomDaved]

December: record low temperatures reached in most parts of the country Also, entire country stranded because electric car batteries won't charge Meanwhile Aiden's dad is the only person with transportation because he found his old gas powered car, with a stick transmission

[@danlarsen793]

Nancy Pelosi mysterious makes another 100 million from the stock market in EV stocks

[@MissouriPA]

Country most Americans can’t find on a map can’t find $1 trillion of US aid. No one knows where it went. It’s a real head scratcher Country most Americans can’t find on a map is demanding $2 trillion dollars in aid

[@courtjester1135]

US prints first ever 1 trillion dollar bill denomination in US history.

[@BESmith-ms8zm]

I remember the good old days when the Bee would do satire.

[@Jason-cn5vo]

I was think about that a few hours ago,before I saw this one.

[@justins3810]

We are so old now that I can't even remember when it became a reality news channel.

[@jeremiahr7585]

Now it’s prophetic

[@jenscheibner792]

More truthful than the MSM...

[@nicderianed]

The Bee satire Era didn't last too long. It ended when their satirical articles started becoming reality. It happened about a month after they started.

[@rlm9093]

😂😆🤣 global warming causes warm temperatures for three months for some reason! My favorite! 😅

[@palaceofwisdom9448]

I remember when The Daily Show staged their various reporters being in different parts of the world arguing whether the climate was currently hot or cold. I miss when it was a comedy show rather than becoming what it once spoofed.

[@rlm9093]

@@palaceofwisdom9448 I'm not familiar with The Daily Show...but sounds like I shouldn't waste my time with it 👍

[@Steaky1300]

"Omg global warming!" **meanwhile texas**

[@a64738]

I will one up you with : I predict in the summer months we will have global warming on the northern hemisphere and global cooling on the southern hemisphere... for some strange reason no one knows. (just like no one know why young healthy people suddenly started dying after they forced them to take the coward19 quaksine... that is a mystery that never ever will be solved...)

[@ErikDeMann]

Anderson Cooper on his knees in a puddle of water comes to mind.

[@RLaraMoore]

"The population of Mexico reached zero" 😂🤣

[@jonericus]

"Americans start moving to an empty Mexico in search of a better life" 🤣

[@andymanaus1077]

That would at least give Trump somewhere to send all the illegals when he deports them.

[@greg2976]

@@jonericus 😂😅

[@michaelgarrow3239]

Fun fact! 10% of Mexicans live in the US right now.

[@ericpl7227]

@@michaelgarrow3239 yeah, and only .01% of them actually pay taxes!

[@cmahar3]

Rachel Levine wins Babylon Bee's Man Of The Year award for a third year in a row!

[@danlarsen793]

With Dylan Mulvaney winning runner up and Sam Brinton honorable mention

[@jenscheibner792]

Rachel Levine gives birth to an alien...

[@secrectpirate3096]

Noway, it's Dylan Mulvaney fight me for it

[@goazer2]

@@secrectpirate3096 Bee should do an election fraud parody of Mulvaney vs Levine over the title.

[@RedlininRednecks]

I love how Biden wins from the mail in votes

[@beerbratscheese1230]

Most of the mail in ballots' return addresses are cemeteries. The FBI investigates and finds no sign of fraud.

[@morrismonet3554]

DeJa'Vu all over again.

[@bibasik7]

That already happened in 2020

[@Dillon_BabylonBee]

as an Indian i have made video responding to the latest post

[@stevandunn2437]

It’s a solid win considering he passed away peacefully in his sleep in January

[@benjaminmatute9085]

“God sends a asteroid to get rid of California” So true.

[@theheavyartillery]

I absolutely lost it at "Obama comes out as even gayer"

[@thecoolbaton8393]

Let me be queer

[@faithdrawing3858]

@@thecoolbaton8393 OBAMAMA????

[@karlostj4683]

California introduces an "Exit Tax" (aka, the "Ransom Tax"): All non-Californians wishing to leave California must pay 1% of their net wealth before being allowed to leave.

[@jenscheibner792]

I think that happened...

[@karlostj4683]

@@jenscheibner792 I think the tax you're referring to is the tax on Californians who leave California (as opposed to taxing people visiting California from Virginia who try to leave).

[@jessicablank6470]

😂

[@dougearnest7590]

Aiden will be taxed for the cool stick he found. Aiden takes his case to the Supreme Court, which will refuse to consider the case because it lacks standing in cases of "found stuff" like cool sticks and fraudulent ballots.

[@kellyryan3886]

"But I found the sticks on my own land" Dems: "hahhahahahahah, nice try, kid"

[@jameshankel8219]

Nearly died laughing when he said Donald Trump destroys Hillary Clinton's final horcrux. That is grade A comedy right there.

[@kj7792]

We can only 🙏

[@1wetpaint]

Hilarious! Uh, what's a horcrux?

[@jameshankel8219]

@@1wetpaint it's from the Harry Potter stories. In the story, the dark lord splits his soul 7 times, and hides those pieces of his soul in 7 different objects called horcruxes. To kill the dark lord, all 7 horcruxes must be found and destroyed. Basically this is a joke calling Clinton evil.

[@kj7792]

@@1wetpaint a reference to Harry Potter

[@PruneHub]

That and "Lizzo eats 3 more backup dancers."

[@dougearnest7590]

My prediction for 2024: Babylon Bee unable to come up with anything as absurd as what the Democrats are doing for real. (Oh wait -- that's an old one. Never mind.)

[@homesteadgamer1257]

These are so normal for this absolutely absurd era that I would be more surprised if these did not come true.

[@Dillon_BabylonBee]

as an Indian i have made video responding to the latest post

[@homesteadgamer1257]

@@Dillon_BabylonBee Con...gratulations? As a genetic mutt, I have responded to this video. The point you're trying to make is unclear.

[@kiddtuffnuff]

yea like the padres are gonna win the world series

[@fyrchmyrddin1937]

Considering how frequently @TheBabylonBee demonstrates their blessing of Precognition/Prophecy, I didn't find this video terribly reassuring.

[@homesteadgamer1257]

@@fyrchmyrddin1937 Yeah, same. I not too long ago watched their videos where their older satire skits/headlines became real. Way too many came true. Now this vid... yikes, the US is in for one helluva year.

[@iamarawn]

Every prediction is reasonable. Like every MSM outlet calling the Iowa caucus after 0.1% of the votes being counted (that actually happened)

[@joshuabessire9169]

Or an Arizona TV station calling the election for Hobbs days before the election.

[@bibasik7]

They already knew that Trump would win by a landslide, so they just decided to call it early and go home.

[@Dillon_BabylonBee]

as an Indian i have made video responding to the latest post

[@Tara-cv2kz]

where they correct though?

[@drewcoffey1299]

Welcome to the conversation, Mr. DeSantis. I mean, seriously, it was a landslide. I could've called that with no data 3 time zones away on my Fax machine. Easier without 127m mail in ballots as well.

[@BlueDog241]

August 1st an asteroid destroys California? Mom: "Happy Birthday, blow out the candles and make a wish." Me: "It already came true."

[@joshuahedges4882]

my guy....🤣🤣

[@kj7792]

No no no. Just LA and San Fran please🙏

[@Selrisitai]

There's actually a surprising number of based people in California. It's, of course and once again, the big cities.

[@mitchelloates9406]

I'm pulling for that asteroid.

[@BreadApologist]

In response to the asteroid impact other leftist traitor states declare their states as an “Asteroid free zone” after which each is hit with an asteroid.

[@deanpatterson2010]

Yesssssss, ha ha ha ha! Wait, I live in California!

[@Christine4music]

Maybe it could steer a bit east to DC?

[@joshuabessire9169]

I predict that no one will live up to that promise to move to Canada.

[@natebyars2439]

🤣🤣🤣

[@matthewkottler5553]

No. One person did and I met him a few months ago. He fled when Trump first took office. He told me he feels unsafe in America now (like a year ago) because he's afraid he who must not be named (yeah he actually said it like that) will return. There's really all kinds of drugs out there.

[@garywagner2466]

The smart ones took one look at Trudeau and stayed put.

[@tgere79]

I'm 100% certain their predictions will all be dead on.

[@raulcastro925]

Sadly yes.

[@gocubs2224]

Well, they 100% guaranteed it themselves!

[@copocopocopocopo]

Especially the December 26th one 😢😢😢.

[@gunsgalore7571]

I like the random "Aidan of Toledo, Ohio, finds a really cool stick in the woods."

[@toddzircher6168]

Update: Aiden gets suspended for bringing a weapon to school. School is locked down and trauma personnel are dispatched. Anti-stick lobby files lawfare case against Aiden's family. Ohio Department of Job and Family Services takes Aiden into protective custody at gun point from 'reckless' parents.

[@gunsgalore7571]

@@toddzircher6168 Too true.

[@transparentglazier]

Stallone begins filming of the next Rocky movie, fauci insists that drinking 4 gallons of Coke a day will stop the spread of covid 3.0 and joe choses AOC over kamala as VP...and she becomes the first woman president creating a Senate select committee to define what a woman is

[@cinmac3]

Rocky wins with Parkinson's Disease?

[@fuzzy3440]

Yeah, he's fighting (beating up) women now since that seems to be a thing. @@cinmac3

[@vancouver9672]

The new committee is still unable to define what woman is despite the fact that the entire committee is made up of them

[@ironbatman9689]

​@@vancouver9672Matt Walsh walks in to provide the data he's collected.

[@ceciliapreziose3783]

very good

[@defectiveindustries]

I'm looking forward to Aiden finding that stick

[@Tempestan]

I want to hear more about this cool stick that will be found.

[@billmatthews5877]

You forgot, Vivek opens 7-11 super store that forces Walmart into bankruptcy 😮

[@vulture3874]

All employees to be armed.

[@ShewasIwas-biden]

This is unnerving considering The Bees track record😳

[@WWeronko]

I turn around and there is Rod Sterling saying "You don't know it yet, but you just entered the Twilight Zone."

[@jenscheibner792]

I thought that was 3 years ago...

[@JustNobodyButME]

I've been there going on 15 years now.

[@peterdavis2020]

More likeThe Night Gallery

[@buckybarnes3803]

Corn Pop releases Memoirs of a bad dude

[@dougearnest7590]

With a forward by a dog-faced pony soldier.

[@danlarsen793]

Hahaha!!! This prediction needs more attention.

[@jenscheibner792]

With a scratch and sniff ice cream cone on the back cover of the book...

[@buckybarnes3803]

@danlarsen793 Inside he thanks Biden for bringing him out of the closet and confesses he's really just a good guy

[@dawnmartz8483]

Lol 😅😂😂

[@DannerBanks]

I laughed out loud at the jabba question

[@Wanda4849]

My 2024 prediction...the Babylon Bee will continue to make NORMAL people like me laugh more than ever. You keep me going at 76!

[@Waffle429]

Why’d you have to specify that you’re normal, I didn’t assume anything was off about you til you said so

[@Oceangirl_505]

I am with you! The BB and God will help us get through 2024. And, I'm 5 years your junior, but I'm catching up to you!

[@Oceangirl_505]

​@@Waffle429Is your comment kind? Is it important?

[@Waffle429]

@@Oceangirl_505 no lmao just saying that writing that you think you’re a normal person makes no sense because everyone has different standards for what they think a normal person is

[@Wanda4849]

@@Oceangirl_505 Keep going, Sister!

[@sherizaahd]

It's just an election year, how crazy could it be?

[@MrTheDif]

This time next year, thee same video will be published on Not The Bee but titled - 2024: A Retrospective.

[@twobitsandpepper8235]

Not gonna lie, the 4th of July clip got me feeling real patriotic! 🎆

[@dougearnest7590]

... and hungry for meat.

[@kj7792]

Same💪😎🇺🇸 best time of the year

[@theabyss8087]

Why would you lie???

[@rodneyspider9452]

Navy spreads Lego blocks all over the White House because revenge is a dish best served cold

[@catwhisperer9489]

😂

[@grantgoldberg1663]

I used to watch the Babylon Bee to laugh. Now, I watch it to see tomorrow's news today.

[@RedlininRednecks]

Also, all cars become electric so the government can turn them off with a fancy switch.

[@lominero5]

They missed that one. Even the Bee doesn't see everything

[@Azurethewolf168]

And that way, they can make us all have no transportation if we so as disobey their cultural customs

[@jenscheibner792]

@@Azurethewolf168 No social credits, you don't get to use or charge your EV...

[@Mythhammer]

LONG before that the power grid melts down.

[@electroborg]

@@Mythhammer bingo, purposefully producing more cars than the grid can sustain is indeed the excuse for remotely switching off cars.

[@direbearcoat7551]

Damn! We're in for a rough ride with these 100% accurate predictions of the near future.

[@jenscheibner792]

I take those over the real events... Boy finds stick!!!!

[@glennwithnell7070]

That's the funniest thing EVER! Immediately following the end of this video there was a commercial for ActBlue featuring the the present occupant of the White House Joe Biden asking me to donate! Did you guys deliberately do that?

[@Lanthanaas]

Bro, do you even ad block?

[@dieseljunky883]

@@Lanthanaas Maybe he doesnt know that adblock found a way around youtubes anti-adblock

[@Lanthanaas]

@@dieseljunky883 The good ones do, anyway. I now some don't keep up as well.

[@JohnShalamskas]

@@Lanthanaas Brave browser for the win.

[@vanheath5382]

Elon’s kid with the Batman symbol for the name 😂

[@electroborg]

Elon is right now smacking his forehead "why didn't I think of that"

[@rocdoc8427]

I wish the Bee would go back to be a satire site instead of a hard news service…..😂

[@johnhenderson1760]

There's no satire left in the world.

[@rlm9093]

Then I predict Babylon Bee will grow in popularity!

[@Thudd100]

I predict that everything will be alright.

[@Swampfox953]

As soon as Donald Trump is back in his rightful place which is behind the resolute desk. Until then we have to hold on tight.

[@catwhisperer9489]

🙏

[@Waffle429]

@@Swampfox953no

[@gunwrencher1566]

Bee hits it out of the park again!

[@SASHAHAG]

The sad part is a lot of this actually could happen.

[@paulis7319]

The Ozempic Games replace the Olympics.

[@tzeffsmainchannel]

WHO ELSE will be watching *THIS video* again on every date mentioned just to verify its accuracy??😅

[@nyashamaruta]

I wanted to laugh then I remembered they predicted things and pretend it's a joke 😂😂😂😂

[@seannordeen5019]

For some reason, the KZbin ad I got before the video played was a Joe Biden fundraiser ad. I initially thought it was part of the video and was waiting for the punch line, though he was strangely coherent, almost like it was a deep fake.

[@jenscheibner792]

Him running is the joke...

[@erik_dk842]

What are these _ads_ you all keep mentioning?

[@D71219ONE]

2:47 Aiden of Toledo is signed by the Padres and is the World Series MVP. Next season, he’s signed by the Dodgers.

[@copperclawz]

Nostradamus and Dion Warwick rolled into 1 couldn't be more accurate!

[@eddrm4685]

There was a obuma joe commercial right after the video...I thought for sure it was part of the show....it was so sad all I could do was laugh! LOL Your prediction are awesome!!!

[@michaelmappin4425]

Prediction: Joe talked about not joking

[@natebyars2439]

Begging for money from the wrong crowd, man youtube is ripping off biden reelection campaing

[@transparentglazier]

@@michaelmappin4425 ...or jumping, don't forget "Don't Jump!"

[@RonaldSkancke]

Hey, they didn't air that in South Dakota. I wonder why 80% republican.

[@dawndelosmuertos4025]

"God sends a meteor to California". Why did that one just crack me up? Maybe because I was forced to live there for 18 years until I left the state, never to return, 20 years ago.Great job, Bee!

[@nataliegerdano6028]

Dang you guys just reminded me I need to get a jump start on my Christmas shopping! Thanks guy!

[@HarryWHill-GA]

I agree with 81% of the predictions. I'll let you figure out which ones.

[@Steve_Kassiotis]

As a Padres fan, I see this as a win. Also, note to self: move to Mexico before asteroid hits

[@micahtdoggknight9728]

in 2024 clicking the little bell is an act of revolution!

[@gregp134]

January: Someone decides they dont like their birthday in January, transitions it to July because they still like "J's".

[@earlsmith7428]

I'm not sure, if we should be entertained or scared senseless.

[@namewithheld8115]

What really terrifies me is the thought that I'll be sitting here next year, watching some channel review just how many things on this list the Bee got right... and it will be most of them.

[@Leann68]

Watch out , Snoops will probably fact check you 😂

[@plusafdotcom959]

FB put me in FB jail for a few weeks for including a link in my comment that they deemed "not factually-based". The link was to a BabylonBee post. I will never stop reminding them of their complete stupidity.

[@chelseabarker2250]

As an Ohioan who has found a good stick in my day, I can confirm these are likely 100% accurate.

[@Bigfoottehchipmunk]

I had doubts about what could be done in 4 minutes. "Is this just a teaser?" I stand corrected and chuckling and cringing... and praying.

[@edwardhollis8737]

The scary thing is how often they're accidentally right.😢

[@CmanWman]

September 23: Ben Shapiro starts talking slower. Ultimately making the world spin slower.

[@JackMeoff-gu7om]

Finally I may be able to understand what he's saying. Thank you I thought there was something wrong with me. Can you understand what he's saying ?

[@srksii]

Lol, this one about Phiser will def be true!

[@davidfull6649]

Going to be a roller coaster ride of a year for sure lol.

[@robertawinters9366]

God's blessings from Bay City Michigan

[@jenscheibner792]

God Bless you and yours Robert. Clinton Twp., MI. 2024 is still God's call...

[@jonericus]

Almost as accurate as the Simpsons!

[@lyngruen8607]

Keep it going!!! You guys are great...I need my Babylon Bee 🐝 fix😂😂

[@six-pack1332]

Years seem to come in sequential order. This too, will change.

[@FreakyDudeEx]

love how it went from plausible to insanely not gonna happen then it went back down to plausible again....

[@ThePharaz]

Babylon Bee wins The Nostradamus Award in 2024 for most accurate 2025 predictions and they also win The Academy Awards for Best Picture of a yet to be written Documentary.

[@grantlingjones26]

Gonna be one hell of a year. Buckle up buttercup

[@chadb7858]

Glad I caught this live. KZbin does not notify ever

[@christopherbascom1629]

They don't notify if it's something that goes against their totalitarian rules.

[@svbarryduckworth628]

Season finale of USA show! Next season is not being renewed by the network so it ends on a cliffhanger. Hope is for a reboot with a new cast on direct streaming, or maybe a comeback movie that flops at the box office but becomes a cult fan hit.

[@acem82]

You can't take the sky from me!

[@svbarryduckworth628]

@acem82 It's my estimation that every man ever got a statue made of him was one kind of sommbitch or another.

[@JustNobodyButME]

I'm a leaf on the wind. Watch how I soar.

[@sammiches6859]

I love the April Fool's day predictions and the followup on the 15th.

[@beingsons9393]

Totally brilliant. Again.

[@mcfarvo]

Looking forward to Todd & Aaron's Awards Show 2024

[@stevecam724]

Great channel, best laugh around 😂😂😂

[@squiggyloveslemons]

Wonderful as always

[@richardmahn7589]

Yes, you are! :)

[@susansmith-rife6266]

You guys are a riot! Thanks for the continuing original, wacky humor!

[@Ozasuke]

January 2024 after watching this: "Ha ha! Hilarious satire!" December 2024 after watching this again: "Well... at least the California Asteroid prediction was also true."

[@Oceangirl_505]

This is so wonderful, I cannot predict how many times I will watch it. BB, well done, you!

[@MrWCLewis12]

I’m voting for the asteroid! Haha. Great video. Giggled several times.

[@I_Stole_A_BTR-80]

January 19: Biden dies April 1: Bidens cuts spending Joe's memory got so bad he forgot dying

[@jenscheibner792]

LOL

[@gigim.9742]

To be fair, he was probably brain dead. ...*Before* dying, I mean.

[@lawrencetalbot8346]

Joe took an early version of Ozempic before it was released to the public so he came back as a zombie.

[@sapinva]

He's actually been dead for years now. And people thought the Russia hoax was the best they can do.

[@Greg-wq4dj]

And just why can’t a dead president elected by dead voters continue to serve? Are you corpseophobic?

[@SG-js2qn]

Sounds about right. Looking forward to tomorrow!

[@liublanka3925]

I still think Huggies will name Biden as their new spokesPERSON in ‘24

[@user-fu8pp4lj8n]

We're pulling for ya, Steve!

[@justins3810]

Absolutely hilarious! Perfect and probably very accurate predictions

[@RodgerE2472]

I'll be amazed if we make it past Nov.

[@childofmary7959]

That was so delightful! Thank you, Babylon Bee!

[@doylebrockman8225]

The most honest news channel.

[@wherami]

makes sense since they do produce all actual news now

[@SpenReyn]

I'm still waiting for them to find the "I was born gay" gene.

[@iamfistoflegend1847]

You all are doing the Lord's work!

[@gubby64]

I appreciate the heads up, thanks!

[@lifeatthezoo2820]

I predict they will reach the debt ceiling. Then they will raise it. Then they will spend until the ceiling is reached again. Then they will raise it. Etc.

[@vickitaylor7525]

I'm ready for a wild ride on the Trump Train

[@jonathanbonde8808]

Brilliant as always :D

[@anthonyiannozzi6777]

Pharmaceutical Companies buy out 100% of commercial TV airtime. And then I will finally pay for stations with no commercials.