The book that changed my social life

There has been only one book that has fundamentally changed the way I interact with people.
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[@betterideas]

So I tried uploading this video like 13 times over the past few weeks but I've been experiencing some crazy hardware malfunctions. I had to delete a lot of the b-roll in this video to make everything work, so hopefully you guys still got something out of it. Everything is resolved now so I'm stoked to finally crank out more content. In any case, thanks for watching!

[@kingberz]

Do you like popcorn?

[@MindNow]

Hahaha wow! Seriously? Oh well, not it’s out. Looking forward to your videos bro!

[@mr.guacamolestuffedunicorn7349]

Better Ideas just popped up on my recommendations and now I’m hooked 😁

[@annkera]

Thanks, I enjoyed the information. :)

[@playawesome8484]

Please Can you review blue Ocean book.. and help me to buy

[@Mukesh20]

Reading a book is easy but implementing it in your life is the real work

[@673497]

Most things that books cover, we already know... It's just implementing that into your lifestyle is the hardest part. You're facing the hindrances after all

[@hm6052]

the real work*

[@mrnaizguy]

& when you manage that you can be proud of yourself

[@nefelibata4190]

reading interesting books are easy.

[@matthewellis663]

That’s the part no one talks about. Being genuinely curious is an endearing quality when you’re subordinate. It is a playful challenge when you are seen as an equal. But when you are perceived as having a greater quality of life than another person, your genuine curiosity is a compliment. For most quality social advice to work, you have to put hard work into multiple areas at once.

[@jonatanamarante]

The book that changed my social life forever was Orwell's 1984. Since I read it, I quit socializing with anyone.

[@TheMarleyDavidson]

@Cool Cool You're joking right?

[@heinzmustermann8416]

*mission failed succesfully*

[@jlinus7251]

I mean I had to analyze it and write essays for it for my hsc in year 12 so that pretty much traumatized me :'D

[@revenger211]

Thoughtcrime is enough fam ;D

[@dariosergevna]

You mean that you’re not talking to anyone? Hard to believe

[@ThatGuyNathan]

1) Make the conversation about the other person 2) Remember and use peoples names 3) Give Genuine Compliments 4) Focus on the person you are talking to

[@connerlacefield8575]

@Inner Voice ok sociopath 👌

[@marianna380]

@Inner Voice wtf u miserable asshole? What was it? Mommy issues?

[@martin-krzywinski]

1) Make conversation about something genuinely interesting, not just to the other person. Sometimes that is indeed the other person but most of the time it's not. 2) Works if you're talking to a dog. People are more complicated than that. 3) Only when they are deserved. Feel free to show scorn in equal balance. 4) Only if they have your attention. Let them know when they're disappointing you.

[@magotchii5225]

I don't know, but I've been socializing like that since birth... I'm not manipulative, I'm a people pleaser. I hate socializing, but I'm so good at it, I just don't take the first initiative,but once the conversation start I make 'em feel special making them stick around longer. I don't mind it, but it sucks sometimes.

[@cautarepvp2079]

@@magotchii5225 yeah is worth it, most people welcome nice words

[@leigh6702]

"If you want to be interesting, be interested."

[@juntjoonunya9216]

'if you want to be cool turn down the ac'

[@sunbaby1190]

My Ouma would say this. God bless her

[@riyaansarfraz8136]

-spongebob

[@almostmonk5523]

Wrong There is nothing wrong if you are interesting or not , Cool or not All of it just rules created by society that u have to be cool and interesting to fit in this society and to make friends. But the fact I don't care about fitting in society or making friends if I have to change myself.

[@ritzyllama]

people dont care how much you know until they know how much you care

[@wengerboy]

"searching reddit for answers" pretty much my life

[@truealiban]

😂😂😂

[@a.m.9096]

Ohhhh my god shouldn't be laughing this much 😂😂😂

[@srb__]

@Lawman Don't be like that my guy

[@LiftOffLife]

Red Pill Reddit.

[@AlexsaurusRex]

Reddit should start it's own browser

[@BlackBirds93]

After 2 same people read this book 1: How are you doing? 2: No how are YOU doing? 1: No you tell me about you 2: No I want to hear about you 1: I am fine but how's your life going 2: It's good how's your day

[@namae270]

Hahahaha

[@dragonboyjgh]

this is the very conversations I was hoping his advice could help me try and avoid.

[@alwaysaravero5215]

ad nauseum

[@PrioBak]

xD I know my boss probably read this book or some derivation of the book and she does whats in the book always.. it feels weird

[@lancemclovlin6471]

Oblivion in a nutshell 😂

[@uvotmin]

I have social anxiety and I'm reading 'How to Be Yourself: Quiet Your Inner Critic and Rise Above Social Anxiety' by Ellen Hendriksen who is a therapist who struggled with SAD herself. Definitely give it a read, it helps me a lot.

[@dhondiramshinde6932]

Hey may I recommend a very good book to give your brain stretch " how not to be yourself "

[@tito4820]

i kako ide

[@johnrute8557]

How was the book? How much did you like it?

[@pantera29palms]

“The Lost art of Listening” You’re welcome.

[@Mohammed-747]

Perfect description.

[@stupidrainbo]

That reminds me of something... "The Lost art of Listening". Have you heard of it?

[@susantunbridge4612]

I'm ordering it.

[@HumansOfVR]

“You can make more friends in two months by becoming interested in other people than you can in two years by trying to get other people interested in you.”Carnegie. Thanks as always! Your a BIG inspiration to my channel

[@xLuky]

- Justin McElroy

[@Rumil_]

1000%

[@sharithajayanandan6691]

Did he establish Carnegie Mellon school

[@peace7482]

Sure, butt kissing does magic 😉

[@thelegendkillersshittyduff1335]

Becauss people are selfish sacks of fucking shit and only care about there shitty ass lives

[@QueenZsWorld]

Too many compliments can make people think you're disingenuous so use them wisely and time them well

[@ellanica]

yes! it's best to compliment when people are proud about something or work hard on something.

[@discoofary]

You also have to be honest with your compliments.

[@Champ.offisiell]

Queen Zey the fewer compliments you give, the more powerfull each becomes.

[@jonathan1391544]

leanderdigerud my compliments my be life changing then

[@Plethorality]

My compliments are given because beauty moves me and often makes me cry. Its easier to say, you look beautiful, than ball my head off! : ) I say that to strangers too.. No underlying agenda. It just spills out of me, like for art or a garden. But thank you for prompting me to look up "disingenuous". I didn't know what it meant. And I am NOT being sarcastic. Nor disingenuous. : ) Though your comment does help me to understand some people's reactions to me. Most frustrating though, when I don't feel believed. But those who know me, know its real. I don't give them out if its not real.

[@mrunseen3797]

I genuinely ask people about their life's. But the conversation dies anyway, because I run out of questions and they don't ask me something...

[@LyoneWoWro]

Because they are not doing their part, they focus on what they care only...

[@eliasstrandell]

I'm 100% certain that you can still be the one getting the conversation going... What kind of questions do you ask? Open or closed? Yes or no or questions that require more of an answer? And what do you ask about? Boring stuff or stuff that they actually like to talk about? When yoy talk to them, are you listening and build the conversation out of what they say? Or just like yeah yeah yeah, next question

[@sofiaduran4241]

I have just started preparing things like "what do you think about endgame?" I haven't had the opportunity yet but I hope it gets me somewhere:D

[@David-cm4ok]

It's very common. Many people I know talk only about themselves. Annoying.

[@altobonifacio8936]

It happens to me and I always end up thinking that people perceive me as a weirdo and I cry

[@jarrettthomas4865]

I’ve kept “how to win friends and influence people” and Marcus Aurelius “meditations” in my book bag every where I go for the past 5 years. Good stuff

[@mohak1990y]

Is meditations a good read?

[@user-ij2jy8mt5e]

@@mohak1990y Reading the Bible is a better choice, Mediations if you read close enough is the Bible without God.

[@jober1905]

*Sees title* My initial thought: DEATHNOTE

[@GoogleAccount-po1gl]

Person doesn't want to be freinds with me? DELETE!

[@cruz.c]

after writing the cause of death, details of the death should be written in the next 6 minutes and 40 seconds. if the cause of death is written within 40 seconds of writing the persons name it will happen. if the cause of death is not specified, the person will simply die of a heart attack.

[@Y2Kvids]

Light

[@jjj555]

First thing that came to my mind too😹😹

[@boslyporshy6553]

*The Bible*

[@emiki6]

"...focus on what Peter Parker was saying." 😂👌

[@knivesinmediaog]

Was planning to comment this lol

[@bjk837]

Hahaha I'm glad he didn't Google his name I actually thought it made it pretty funny ! 😂

[@emiki6]

@@bjk837 agreed. I never thought ignorance can be this kind of good humor source. Joey always teaches us something. :D

[@andrewnguyen4827]

Power comes with great responsibility

[@zimdollar3229]

@Apple Zheng Yang That guy will always be known as spider-man

[@teravega]

As someone who started reading this book because of this video, I want to point out towards the end about you saying some people need someone pretending they care, I refer back to the book about people hearing cheap praises and that people don't like flattery but genuine appreciation. So although some people need to hear some sort of validation of their day, it should come from a genuine place because if you fake it, people will notice it and think less of you. I just thought of reminding that from the book. I really think you made a great video that peaked my interest of this book so I'm grateful to come across your channel. Thank you for your incite and sharing your views.

[@Jimmyeatshrimp]

thank u sir

[@susantunbridge4612]

"piqued" your interest

[@myrtila]

There is this girl in my class who always gives out compliments to people but they don’t seem genuine and it’s like she’s doing to make friends. Compliments are tricky

[@susantunbridge4612]

Complimenting cynics and cold people is always tricky. I feel for her, trying to connect with people like you. I live in a cold city, where people look at you with suspicion if you suggest going for coffee.

[@enlightenedtrucker739]

Smile. Remember and use a persons name. Be lavish with your compliments. Can confirm that book is a masterpiece.

[@notmyrealpseudonym6702]

Be genuinely interested. other peeps know shit you don't, you know shit they don't.

[@UncleRuckuss]

I hate it when people keep pronouncing my name every other sentence.

[@JohnStockton7459]

@@fealdorf i hate u

[@nicksmith-cx1fx]

Problem with this attitude is 99% of the people won't reciprocate in kind, they will be endlessey talking about themselves. This will drain you. I don't want the 99% to like me. I want to be with the 1% who also like me and are interested in me or i will rather be alone. My goal is not other people liking me.

[@inkshermit9055]

@@nicksmith-cx1fx Did you just contradict yourself?

[@rifan_j]

"Sometimes people just need somebody who pretends like they care..." I couldn't agree more.

[@stephanierojas3185]

I’m definitely gonna read this book. I’m tired of this constant social anxiety. I just want friends...

[@jhonny9378]

Me too

[@yeeli7989]

Don't waste your time. It isn't going to help much and everything written isn't anything you don't know

[@gustavschnitzel]

How it's going now?

[@Shshshiykyk]

Hey be friend add me on snap.m ejaga792

[@davidkramer194]

kzbin.info/www/bejne/lX-0eIR_otejrpY

[@tagtraumerin5077]

This book and "How to stop worrying and start living" have been changing my life since the first time I read them. I sometimes just listen to the audio book on Spotify or read a chapter when I have the need to. I never thought a book could have this impact on my life.

[@designingjuan]

I'll have to check this one out. Probably not related but one book I find myself going back to is "From Poverty to Power". I can literally flip to any page and be mesmerized with the wealth of knowledge.

[@tagtraumerin5077]

@Inner Voice who's the one here that needs a life, someone who writes comments about books or comments telling people to get a life? Hope this is a troll hahaha

[@burpie3258]

that Inner Voice bitch is a looooser

[@burpie3258]

@Inner Voice hm still a loser lmao

[@PixelSheep]

I'll try this one too 👍

[@SharonTseung]

I'm currently reading that book! It's all about listening and being interested in others

[@aylex1974]

You get tired of doing that. The things that you received are that they forget about you when they found their tribe.

[@mariamalnahdi4483]

Why KZbin is recommending this to me 🙂 is my social awkwardness that obvious 🙂

[@sapiens814]

Strong the awkwardness in this one is.

[@josephchiorazzi8276]

content marketing

[@jky1771]

probably

[@borednsleepy]

i like it very much when people say my name when starting a conversation instead of just “hey you”

[@rrastamarian]

Good morning mr shelby

[@amberleaf9823]

By the owdahh of the peaky fakinn blinders!!

[@GinoBrouwers]

It's insane when you realize how much value can be taken from a couple pieces of paper with words on them. I can safely say that picking up the habit of reading books has changed my life for the better!

[@CH-tv1cy]

@@fnchrstphr truth

[@GinoBrouwers]

@Inner Voice

[@GinoBrouwers]

Inner Voice Haha I'm natural man :) appreciate the compliment!

[@korobkov1]

This reminds me of the book 'the fifth agreement'

[@jockeralex21]

@Inner Voice Get a life and stop insulting people that haven't done anything to you.

[@sovietelectioncollidingtro6231]

It's funny... as soon as I read the title I was thinking about that exact same book without even watching the video. Great book!

[@SalemPhiladelphia]

Law of attraction

[@bendavis2459]

Holy crap me too

[@VibhorDubey99]

I was thinking of this book in college today, and came home to see this video in my recommendations

[@scorpions7153]

Law of attraction is the worst book ever

[@josiahb1207]

Agreed, I personally try my best to always let the other person talk about themselves and listen but whenever I talk about myself to someone who is genuinely listening, it can be a powerful feeling.

[@jasha7579]

That's literally active listening, which I do whenever my friends want to talk about their issues. The goal for me is to try and get as much information laid out as possible, so that both of us have a clearer perspective of what's going on. Main rule in it is to not talk about yourself

[@TripleIProductions]

Glad I watched this. Quite inspirational - also thanks for explaining that there is actually something to be gained from liking it. Never understood why people used to ask for it before.

[@moazzamtahir7574]

i always had that book on my desk but never read it. Now, I definitely will!!

[@Manuel-gu9ls]

Moazzam Tahir I have books that I read and read back the part that are read

[@petra5323]

Same! I was thinking 'that sounds familiar'...

[@MissSunshine221]

Lol I threw the book out a few days ago because it’s been on my bookshelf for years & I’ve never read it

[@TChoppy46able]

This really got me deeply:”even carrying on basic human conversation was something I didn’t really know how to do very well”. Infact, my case it’s not WAS and DIDN’T, it always has been that way for 30++ years to the point i start questioning the point of my existence

[@UncleRuckuss]

Is it just me or does anyone else feels uncomfortable when a person uses your name more than twice in a conversation and starts to ask too many questions about you?

[@VuongNgocHieu99]

Its all about the balance

[@heavycurrent7462]

The question has to be tailored into something the asker can follow up with his own input. That‘d make a healthy and normal conversation instead of an interview.

[@ethelbarton6668]

Ime not giving intrviews this week.

[@jackiew6598]

I had a coworker who was very curious and also very aggressive so he would excitedly and aggressively ask lots of questions about peoples lives. Noooooo! Too much!

[@maebunny5298]

You can always redirect the question back to them. Usually that’s how it goes and you both learn more about each other

[@stormz4069]

I'm glad that I found one of the most underrated channels ever! NO DOUBT, NO REGRET You deserve my sub

[@zorigtnarangarav]

Wow, this was one of the best videos out there on human interactions. Nice summary of the book itself. Appreciate it. Awesome research and an amazing quality video. Good work.

[@sazluqman8056]

I read that book 4 years ago and it literally changed my life and my relationships with ppl ❤

[@sunmoon9574]

You have a lovely sense of subtle comedic timing. Genuinely humourous while still taking the subject matter seriously. Very engaging! Thank you. 🙏🏽

[@tagtraumerin5077]

Better Ideas: You should remember names Also better Ideas: When Peter Parker met Leonardo DiCaprio... Whatever I forgot his name

[@betterideas]

HAHAHA

[@laxyamusic8162]

@UCwjimEU25P7j6brm3IzZWuQ He was going for the real name, not the character name. As he said he forgot Peter Parkers name - Tobey Maguire.

[@yanzi8543]

How to forget Tobey Maguires name? :D

[@sagelioneldsouza8230]

@@yanzi8543 *swoosh"... Just like that..

[@yanzi8543]

@@sagelioneldsouza8230 and just like that Peter Parker became a person in real life :D

[@alexsous5386]

Great video, loved the insight and perspective. And uh I like your shirt.

[@socialanimal]

Very good book, I like to read it again every so often but as many people said, the challenge is not in knowing what it says but actually putting it into practice. Personally, I started to become self-aware of many moments in my daily life where I would want to interact with someone around me and did not and eventually started going for it every time. Not only did I met tons of people but it allowed me to learn a lot about myself and change my perspective on others and how I approach interacting with people.

[@joshcrowell9123]

Thanks for the videos bud. I am slowly watching all of them.

[@fredr6804]

That sounds like a great book. I just reserved it at the library. Can't wait to read it.

[@jamezdfit]

Aight wow that's honestly opened my mind so much already, and I can see other people I aspire to be like portraying these qualities. This channel is amazing, so much value. Subbed and definitely gonna pick us this masterpiece.

[@ryanellion]

The book? “How to win friends and influence people” by Dale Carniege

[@deanj6722]

Heyy fatty!!

[@johnathonlequinta1333]

Na that's deathnote

[@ll-sz9fl]

Thanks

[@skulptor]

Total carnage.

[@frarfarf]

great comment for people who don't have the patience to wait 55 seconds into the video

[@Smaltese93]

Amazing book. Rereading it currently. This book actually helped ask a girl out(she said yes) get a job and promotion, and deal with my kids. Definitely a must read

[@baranozcan4383]

wait, hol'up

[@laxxayy]

Nice

[@GeekyMino]

I knew it! Same here bro, that is THE book😊 Remembering people's names is so simple and yet so powerful. It's sad how very few people do it nowadays.

[@h.hristov]

Great book. I can totally recommend. Helped me make friends at uni

[@O.G.H.]

Whats the name of the book tho?

[@hliebhalunko5214]

There is always a moment in your videos that inspires me and drags me out of brain fog and daily routine. Thanks a lot, Joe!

[@maria.3.3.3]

This book is amazing. I'm a 17 years old teenager and used this book to feel more comfortable around partys and it helped me so much but also the way I interact with my friends has changed.

[@dynastus]

Great book. 📕 Read it the first time and now review the audiobook annually for a refresher. which I really need sometimes. Thanks for sharing. 👍

[@gyccowrites]

U should start a podcast i would listen

[@gyccowrites]

@Inner Voice omg my inner voice is telling me to do that

[@nss490]

JustMeGina #metoo

[@ahmednasser9962]

Inner Voice u clearly have issues based on how u speak. Someone give this man a hug

[@CN-wt2bj]

Gaawwd the last thing the internet needs is another Podcast.

[@DaveWard-xc7vd]

Once the people around me realize that they are in the presence of greatness we all get along just fine.

[@LegendaryJoshua]

Brilliant video! I read the book years ago but I've never understood the concepts so well until now. This will definitely help me have better social interactions!

[@sambhullar5995]

0:09 Looks like joey did 100 PUSHUPS 100 SITUPS 100 SQUATS and 10 KM JOG till he became bald.

[@toxicfart1913]

I see you are a man of culture..

[@kamaldmomoh]

👊👴

[@SunSunSunn]

Lmao opm routine cracks me up everytime just because of how inaccurate it is

[@ibrahimhakimi4097]

Toxic Fart hahahahhaha

[@ratsalad178]

don't forget, he probably also never uses the air conditioner

[@maximilianjendrall9798]

Great video Joe, thanks for the incredible tips/lessons

[@GloryBe2God]

This is what Gary Vee preaches: “Perspective” As you mentioned in your video, it is your perspective that changed and as a result everything else changed with it

[@jdsilvestri]

I definitely don't want to talk about myself all the time, I can't imagine I am alone in that lol.

[@martinv.-]

This was my first self-improvement book also, the beginning of something really big!

[@Hadezul2]

I think mine too, although I now see it a grossly flawed, it at least started a new paradigm shift

[@alexbecker4149]

@@Hadezul2 *flawed how?*

[@Hadezul2]

@@alexbecker4149, the book promotes a submissive mind and behaviour that works great in some circumstances, but not others. It assumes that everyone around you is shy, repressed and self-absorbed. The problem with this book is its advice is absolutely not a good idea for anyone who finds themselves in an environment where they are bullied, ostracised, and pitied. It makes no account for the existence of sociopaths, cliques, or people who simply see you as beneath them.

[@alexbecker4149]

@@Hadezul2 *yeah, that's a tricky situation. if someone is not open to being your friend, because they don't need you and have leverage over you, you can't win their heart.* *That's like a war situation, either get out or acquire enough leverage over them so that you can fight back.* *Did you read about the Gervais principle / power talk / identifying psychopaths?* *I also recommend reading the book The 48 laws of power and The art of War. For understanding how psychopaths operate.* *Also if they just seem like assholes but aren't psychopaths you can still turn them around.*

[@Hadezul2]

@@alexbecker4149 Hi thanks. I've not read them, but I did read People Skills by Robert Bolton and highly regard that book over HTWFAIP

[@Hadezul2]

I was in a similar place when I discovered and read that book. When I applied its advice I had much less positive experiences. I recommend People Skills by Robert Bolton. This book made me realise I was surrounded by aggressive people who will never appreciate the "submissive" behaviour practices encouraged in HTWFAIP.

[@grayology3323]

Hey man, Thanks for making this video. I have been having a tough time working with people at my job, but after watching this, it's made me change the way go about things and its improved my interactions so much more. Again, thanks for sharing this with me!

[@viindieadm6073]

I was listening without watching the video, it was so interesting I subscribed! When the content you give is high quality there's no need to say to subscribe. I also appreciate the fact that you sounded genuine during the ad. Nice work!

[@Aiden214]

There's an episode of Friends I like where Phoebe enters a party where she doesn't know anyone. She says something like, 'this is great I don't know anyone here so I don't have to bother talking to anyone or caring'. I love that! I think there is sometimes too much focus on pushing people to talk and have clunky awkward conversations when perhaps they just don't like the company!! Nothing wrong with that. I'm a big fan of going to parties and just eating and getting around for a bit. If noone talks to me, who cares! But more often than not while I'm over indulging in food, I somehow end up on the sidelines *omg I'm starving big workout today, you go to the gym? Yes I do have you been thinking of joining etc etc* with dte ppl or shy ppl having a chat and we become some kind of group together for the rest of the party.

[@navyforeveryoungjean-phili5940]

This can be a turnoff to me. I am someone that will notice others investigating me and flattering me so they can feel good about their own insecurities

[@rewindthefuture1600]

I read the Book after seeing this Video two Months ago and it Helped me a lot. Its not just super helpful advice but also some general Rules about how to interakt properly with people. Its unbelivable, I just didnt know such things bevor reading this Book. Thank you very much for influencing me in reading this Book, it was a trip. (a friend of mine is also reading it now and likes it a lot)

[@spencerkraus]

BRO this book changed my life as well, and I am a naturally outgoing extrovert! This is one of the first books I recommend to anyone who is trying to improve themselves. WHO you know is more important than any WHAT you can know/learn, so ensuring you have as many effective conversations possible is so key to success. So cool that you made a video specifically for this book!

[@arelcrest5048]

Omg, we have that book!!!!! O . O I‘ve had it in my hands and though it might be too old.. ok, now I go back to my parent’s book shelve and take it. 😊

[@thisisseasons]

Bro you got me inspired

[@wendallparker8420]

I read this book after graduating college. It is a great book. I’m so happy this changed your life. I combined this book with observing people in real life and social media, and my.life improved as well.

[@afeeser]

Yes! This book changed my life. And most of the other self-improvement books take things from this book and don't explain it as well. This book helped me improve my work life, especially.

[@Syn]

I always ask how other people are doing and how's life been or how's their day but the conversation ends because they either shut it down or just don't say anything and the awkward silence of all 5 other people I asked how they were doing.

[@yokes6316]

maybe get more friends

[@yokes6316]

more people more chances

[@GoldenMushroom64]

Exactly. What’s the point in trying if people don’t want to talk. Especially in Covid lmao

[@ryanrowell8860]

If you have trouble with conversations that kind of end early, I would suggest three things. First, make sure that when you ask questions, you make them open ended. A great is example is NOT saying "how was your day" because you will get a one word answer, to "what did you enjoy doing today?" this one is not great either I grant because they could say they had a bad day, or just give you a small action, but it is at least better than "fine" or "good". Second, try to go for deeper conversation like this video from improvement pill kzbin.info/www/bejne/qXnId4p-pdJ7ia8 basically just ask people about their emotions instead of facts. Not "what did you do today", but "how did you feel today". Final tip would be just getting people to talk about themselves. As much as you can figure out about them from boring questions, use that. A great quote from this very book is “Talk to someone about themselves and they'll listen for hours.” ― Dale Carnegie It means that if you can figure out what they personally enjoy, you can get them to talk FOREVER about it. I have a friend who started a wood fence staining business that I learned about after casually asking what his job was, and when I asked about the details of exactly what he did, I practically had to change the subject after his face light up and he talked for 10 minutes about the different shades of paint! It is all about using little things you learn to foster deeper questions. I know there are more videos about conversation starting on the internet, and to summarize them the key is to start with general questions about generally common things like: family, occupation, hobbies, and dreams, and then once you find something they really enjoy talking about, you can keep them talking.

[@ryanrowell8860]

@@GoldenMushroom64 This just makes me feel like I should join the subreddit and actually talk stuff out with a good group of people who want to listen but also to get out of the selfish community they are a part of.

[@danielszaniszlo4553]

"People actually invite to stuffs" 😂😂 I'm dying of laughter, cause I had this break point what is pretty awesome😮

[@stayfocused7221]

Great stuff man💪🏾

[@Creeder991]

First time to see one of your videos. It’s absolutely worth the time and I’m so happy you’ve overcome your social anxiety. I’ve heard a lot about this book and actually read it years ago. I think it’s time to re-read it and apply more of it.

[@MissSunshine221]

The pool guy at the hotel I’m staying at was like “good morning alyssa” as he handed me a towel and I was like.... dude.. we’ve only met once & you remembered? THANKS

[@ChaosTherum]

I wish I had the kind of brain that remembers names after one meeting.

[@cianadsouza]

I once gave a genuine compliment to my friend for her gym regime, and my other friend tells me when would I begin, to which I said I don't know but atleast i can encourage this girl to continue her regime. This girl instantly said I don't need any sort of motivation. I said good for you. That's the end of conversation!

[@sanaknik581]

You could have continued the conversation by saying something about self-discipline. It's like a game of associations: regime-motivation-discipline-procrastination-things to do when procrasrinating-youtube-... Ha ha

[@KobeFan12452]

Thank you, you’ve opened my eyes even more to what I should do and how I should view others. I will definitely pick up a copy of the book and subscribe to your channel.

[@adamlake9507]

dude, I love your channel

[@babys8640]

i have the opposite problem, i make everybody feel valued just bc im nice and i focus on the good things in ppl (as long as they are not evil or sth), idk it comes naturally to me. and then everybody thinks they’re special to me because i was nice to them and basically i do what you say all the time without having read that book or watched your video. i didn’t talk much as a kid but i listened to everybody so i think i just noticed what people wanted to get from a „good conversation“. the „problem“ with that ist that i do it everytime unless somebody is mean or rude or sth, but then i seem to disappoint them when i treat everybody the same. and im like dude i was just being nice lol. and no, i don’t flirt or anything, it’s the same for both sexes. so be careful and only use these strategies on ppl you really want to get closer to

[@immacentaur8793]

that must be...lonely..

[@adarsh915]

0:11 look at his eyes Smile triggers along with anxiety to calm the mind

[@pedroamador7806]

Hello! Greetings from PUERTO RICO! Love your channel! Bright and abundant blessings to you!

[@nickcarter5569]

Your channel is truly helpful. This is what I love about KZbin university, your videos have so much value packed in. Thank you for being one of the best professors I’ve ever had here at YTU. 😁😎👍🏻

[@judeconradfrancis]

love your vids Joey! im sure you're gona reach million subs in no time

[@betterideas]

Thank you!

[@myecolife4333]

When I was about 12 years old, my Dad started giving me financial economic and investing books to read and I was successfully investing money as a teenager.....then when I was about 16-17 my friend gave me novels about the war in the jungles of Vietnam and that made me a bit crazy and made me want to go into the Special Forces and I eventually became a Recon Ranger (Special Forces) in the Marines and that changed me and my life and gave me discipline and also made me a bit crazy and wild, but all ended well.....then in my early 20's I started reading the positive self help books and listened to tons of tapes and eventually CD's and many courses all in the arena of Think and Grow Rich and How To Win Friends and Influence People and the list goes on, and that was very helpful and life changing and I should have never stopped those books audios and courses but between those books and the Marine Corp it gave me discipline and helped to do well in college.......then I was balanced enough to become a serious successful currency trader in the Futures markets....but then all my positive life and investing and business success started going down hill from a bad relationship that turned my life upside down and I lost my focus and just started bouncing around and traveling and partying and fun and way too many different girlfriends looking for the right one, but the right one never appeared. So I started spending more and more time in South America looking for something that wasn't there....so I thought maybe Miami Beach would be the answer to whatever I was looking for and eventually I realized South Beach and Miami was the last place I should be.....So I left the country again over 10 years ago and I never moved back to the US....I finally realized that it must be me or at least that is what I thought....then 9 years ago down here someone gave me a Bible and that is the book that has changed everything in me and my life....so I've come to the conclusion that it isn't really me with the problem, even though I have problems and I am not perfect, but I was looking for something that is very hard to find because we live in a fallen world that is owned and controlled by an evil fallen entity known as the Devil .. Satan .. Lucifer and many more names. He is the King of this world and pure evil.....and like most people, I was oblivious to the fact that he is real and does exist. To make a long story shorter, I will end it here. Read your Bible first (KJV) and foremost. Life is short. You must get on track with GOD or things won't go well for you, especially when you leave this world. Read and watch tons of Godly KZbin videos and watch what happens to your life. Adios from the mountains of Guatemala Lake Atitlan.............and by the way, I am 53 years old now and a completely different person I AM now because of the Bible....its the only book that has saved my life and hopefully it will save my soul..............

[@woobertdoo]

I had an aneurysm trying to read this. Punctuation goes a long way, my friend.

[@projectfulfilledlife1340]

Thank you for wasting my time :(

[@Marixpress2]

*NKJV 😛

[@Sebastian_Thimm]

KJV, that's most probably the version of the bible from which Satan stole all the commas and full stops to then make dick pics in ASCII-art.

[@AdisCandra]

25 seconds in and i already feel you on such a deep level. i first started getting into self improvement around mid 2017, and people who knew me prior to that... they're just nightmares to me, the connection i built throughout 2013-2017 is just a mess.

[@hey-zel]

That scene from The Great Gatsby will always make me feel an overwhelming sense of happiness and excitement. It’s just so well done.

[@xuxagirl87]

"if you're lurking here.." Called. Out.

[@Jenna_Joseph]

"People's favorite hobby and people's favorite topic and the one they're most comfortable talking about is things to do with themselves." Except INFJs. We would rather talk about you. And yes, I realize the irony of this comment.

[@PotatoCouch666]

Glad I found your channel! awesome content!

[@mage6562]

Most impactful video I’ve ever watched.

[@Christopher-md7tf]

Social anxiety is the fear of negative judgement from others. So you're worried about how others perceive YOU. You're focused on yourself and your image, how you come across. Being in the moment and focusing on the other person is the natural antidote to that. A.k.a. "getting out of your head". I also find that the more I meditate (with Holosync), the more I am genuinely interested in other people because over time, my perspective widens more and more. You naturally start to become curious how other people see the world instead of wanting to convert everybody to your way of thinking.

[@well_i_liked_it]

Book that changed my life: "Where's Waldo?" , safety in numbers. They will never find me.

[@salwa8161]

😂😂😂😂 interesting book

[@sarahs5340]

Oh my goodness, you are such a lovely and genuinely kind man. I really like your personality. I’m working on self improvement and people-skills too.

[@kalebvick]

Thanks a ton for making these videos

[@bongs1995]

You just described the introvert king, our Lord and saviour, Keanu Reeves

[@astranoel895]

May the Keanu be with you. Amen!

[@adamromero]

@@astranoel895 ...and also with you.

[@vinodkumaraug]

Hail Hydra

[@sdburr08]

😂😂

[@DillonColtMusic]

@@astranoel895 May The One be with you.

[@manny3332]

Where ever I go, I can’t escape tiege Hanley 😂

[@sal_strazzullo]

Finally someone 😂😂😂

[@matthewlev1342]

Great video! I’ll be coming back to this one!

[@obeezeed7843]

Just found your page randomly today. Love it. Great info and short but long enough to get the point. 👍

[@calt2161]

My anxiety always comes when one person inevitably asks a closed ended question. The conversation always has that brief, but painfully awkward silence, where both people are trying to decide to either end it or come up with an entirely new thread. That moment of tense silence has always been the biggest social landmine for me. I always find myself preemptively ending the conversation and leaving to find something else instead of trying to think of a natural transition to a new topic.

[@Name-fk8zk]

I knew EXACTLY what book you were going to talk about. When growing up I had social anxiety due to childhood physical and mental abuse to the point where I would physically shake when someone spoke to me. A few years ago I met a diagnosed sociopath. Honestly not the first person you’d trust or expect to help, but he talked to me through text (I found it easier that way) and we had a lot of things in common (surprisingly) he understood what I went through. He talked a lot about himself and the way he views people and the world. He introduced me to psychology; pointing me in the right directions to self improvement. He gave me this book on our last day together. He told me, “this book will change your life. Once you read it, you can’t go back.” I read it. I read it again. I cherish it. After that book I wanted more. I read, did more research on my own and discovered so many amazing and wonderful things... I gained confidence and started to love myself. I lost my bad habits, lost weight and lost almost all my ‘friends’ who used me when I was vulnerable. I stand up for others when they need me. I’m hard to criticise. The curse is that I find myself manipulating people all the time. I get bored easily when I have to carry a conversation and I’ve started judging a lot. Relationships are also a struggle because my standards are too high. I have a good amount of patience but when I snap I can bring the person to tears and make them feel awful. I just hope I don’t become what I’ve always hated. At least I don’t shake anymore.

[@hemenkalita6582]

The Female definitely you too are a self centered psychopath.

[@douglasjunior9245]

Lol so you’re a demon now?

[@wronglayerbutok]

With great power comes great responsibility. The downside of having a lot of knowledge is that daily matters and small talk isn't stimulating enough and we don't know how to implement what we've learnt into the real world. However, you may not shake anymore, but leaning over to manipulating and getting bored of people can just be a new way your symptoms are showing? That makes sense to me , at least. I hope you get the support you need and deserve!

[@enid2798]

guess you're a sociopath now

[@sproutlove]

Sounds like you read and put into practice too much the 48 laws of power?

[@Carson_ppg]

Its easy to see why your channel is so popular! Great content man🙌🏼

[@PurpleSunshine23]

Awesome video. This is really helpful!