The Courage to be Disliked (a thought for makers)

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In this video I talk about one of the central ideas in a book I read recently called "The Courage to be Disliked" by Fumitake Koga and Ichiro Kishimi, and how I believe it relates to those of us who make things.
#creativity #philosophy #thecouragetobedisliked

[@andydragonfisher6900]

‘I was going to sacrifice my chance of originality in the quest for popularity’ - what a beautifully succinct observation. One thing I did this year which has really helped me separate ‘my’ direction from imitation was to have a 3 month social media break and then commit to produce images that I would never share with a wider audience during that ‘detox’ period. It was really interesting how the work changed once I took other people’s opinions out of the equation. I had to figure out what ‘my jam’ was rather than what I thought other might like - a really worthwhile exercise.

[@seantuck]

Good advice.

[@DESSERT_X]

The courage to be Disliked goes hand in hand of not selling your soul.

[@mikefoster5277]

Of course, most of us have to 'sell our souls' in life to some extent. In order to earn a living especially, for example. I guess the idea is to find the right balance between being yourself and doing your own thing, on the one hand, and on the other hand doing what is necessary in order to fit in and get along with others. And sometimes that can be a delicate path to tread!

[@ncjr372]

"Feel the fear and do it anyway" that’s beautiful, and true.

[@anttimoilanen]

Originality stands alone. One of the things that rarely gets talked about is how lonely it is when you do your own original thing with your own vision. The more original your vision is the more alone you are with it. It can’t sometimes be explained or described so that you can’t have the Support from your peers that you sometimes might need.

[@KevinChaires]

What a strong message! A few years back I felt this pressure due to the fact that my photos weren't looking like those popular photography concepts shown in social media, but I suppose it's always better to stick to your own style, since whatever you do, there are always going to be people who like it and who will dislike it. Great video as always, Sean!

[@ijumaaproductions]

Yes, develop your own style! All the best in your photo journey.

[@oldtowneast]

How do you not have a million subscribers? You are legendary

[@trevor9934]

I never saw The Meaning in the Making as a photography book. I saw it as a philosophical expression of the things one must deal with in order to be a creative, or to achieve something in life. I have read and enjoyed it and found it quite inspiring. Thank you!

[@giuseppecalabro6873]

I live in Italy not very far from Tuscany. I confirm that it's a wonderful place to take shoot photos in May and June. One of the best regions to do so.

[@keraniarpaia8637]

Only two minutes in, I knew this was going to hit hard. You’ve exactly described the deconstruction process I’ve been on with my own creative journey, going from using imitation as a means of instruction to confusing popular with good to finally realizing that I didn’t want to make to please others I wanted to make to please myself. Thank you for this.

[@merida98]

I really enjoyed your book because it wasn't only photography related and filled with your own experiences, and the added psychology made it so great! I'm glad you stuck with your ideas. :)

[@seantuck]

Thanks so much:)

[@TheFilmFellow]

I much more prefer a person whom is honest with me, giving me a contradictory opinion to my own. With that person I know where I stand. Yes, photographically it’s almost as if we live in the this world of everything “has” to be “liked”. Yet this is so superficial. Wonderful video Sean, as always and I love it how you include examples of your own life. Makes things so much more relatable.

[@matttovey5327]

I like what you say here Sean, we need to shout about not being liked to our children too. With social media pressuring us all to gain likes with every post & comment, it can’t be healthy. Just about to order your book, keep up the good work!

[@steveamurray59]

You can't please everyone. I found that watching your channel made for a better read. Love your Work !

[@petermcginty3636]

I have zero problem with photos that have been photoshopped. This is a path that many people take as a way of expressing themselves or enjoying their leisure time. I choose to shoot jpeg because I enjoy the process of taking photos. I don't enjoy the process process of editing but I can enjoy the work of others that use Photoshop.

[@hramakrishnaiah413]

Being true to yourself and being different from the rest of the crowd requires courage, and involves risk but that is the best way forward. My philosophy is don't become another face in the crowd.

[@julianheritage6436]

Keep being true to yourself Sean . KZbin is awash with bland copycat content. Your videos are like an oasis in a desert that I always look forward to seeing

[@marinellaartist]

I love your spirit, your values and philosophy. Bad thing are good things that’s how we get stronger. I’m also an artist but not a photographer, I put all my emotions in my art, is my best therapy. I’m not good in writing but I try. Thank you to be here and I appreciate your values in true life 🙏🏼😊

[@helxis]

The courage to be disliked is something that the majority of the population lacks. And it has been made far, far worse by social media, where how much we are liked is something being constantly measured in concrete (even if arbitrary) ways.

[@azzalos]

I am actually reading this book (the one at the beginning) myself right now. I am really enjoying it so far. Thank you for putting yourself out here. I almost never publish any of my photos, despite having gotten amazing feedback re. my work. For some reason it does not stick and I feel it’s never perfect. All I can see in them is critique and imperfection.

[@marcusineson]

Once again I held off watching this until I had the time to properly listen rather than just grab it in a short gap in a day. Once again I’m glad I did. Thanks Sean (again)

[@rabinkarki2690]

Your videos and visual representation are different than any of the photographers and videographers out there. I enjoy every one of your videos. Your book was amazing. Thank you for inspiring all.

[@RustyBrownPhotography]

As always, you've nailed it, again Sean. Well-said, my friend. I know of many who appear to stay in the perceived 'safe space' of artistry, whereby they're merely doing the things they think others will like. People who have amazing talent -- but still worry about the opinions of others, and often compromise that talent -- that creative genius, due to the lack of courage of being disliked. When I read your book - I found myself commenting outloud -- often, in agreement with what you were saying. Trust me -- we all need to hear it (read it) at times. It's an amazing confirmation (for many of us) that we're ok - our journey is ok - our art form is ok - our eye on creativity is ok - and yes, some won't understand or like it -- but you know what .... it's ok. It's difficult to convey how much better a photographer I became once I stopped stressing over whether or not the community would like my work. Perhaps it has something to do with aging, and now -- as I come up on 64 years old, time is more important to me than anything. So why do we waste so much of it worrying/stressing about whether or not we're liked -- or whether or not our work is liked. I embrace my artform now more than at any other time, and it shows in my work. To your point here - yes, it's great when someone likes my work - especially someone I respect and admire. We all need some sense of belonging. However, not everyone will like what I do (or even understand it), so I don't create seeking adulation or concurrence. I create what I like, and that has caused me to dive so much deeper into photography. What could be better than that? Thank you for this message. I'm not sure you'll fully appreciate just how much so many artists need to here it. Cheers!

[@TaylorWillard]

Thanks for this Sean! Appreciate the perspective and reminder. I just posted my first KZbin video and the few who have disliked or disagreed has been a new experience to navigate online. Separating yourself from the work and constantly stepping into that courage to be yourself and find what makes you unique is so important.

[@susandayboll108]

Love your book and PARABLE. This video really speaks to me. So need to please and be liked and usually don’t succeed! Try way too hard. Thanks!

[@DaciHuang]

Love these talks and "those who don't feel fear don't really need to be brave, it's the ones who are paralyzed by fear that really need that courage"

[@Bobby_sprinkles]

I'm glad I've got to a point where I know that some people will love my work and some people will hate it and that's completely fine. It's always the most important that I'm challenging myself and I'm growing as a creative.

[@kennethpaul810]

Such great advice, Sean! I've learned this a long time ago, when I started my career in radio as a disc jockey. I was so scared the first time I turned on the microphone and said the first words, live on the air! Eventually I got better but was never great at it but enjoyed it anyway, and yet that fear still was always lying in the shadows. Yes, the opposite of fear is not courage, the opposite of fear would be more like "reckless abandon" and that's not a good way to approach nearly anything. If you do something you are fearful of and do it anyway, you might fail, you might succeed. But, if you fail, you get up and do it again and make it better each time. The same goes for anything you create and put it out for the world to see or hear. Once it's out there, most of it you can't take back and the haters will come. As you've said before, then you have to learn which of the criticisms to listen to and which to let roll off your back. I also loved your book, "Meaning in the Making." So much insight is in those pages. It is exactly the book you should have written, I'm glad you stuck to your ideas instead of putting out one that just says the same thing as so many others have said. It is truly a unique work and one that should be read, especially someone like you and I as well, who are basically intrinsically an introvert. Find that courage and determination, because it takes a lot of that as well, to face the fears and put it out there anyway. If you like what you've done then there's bound to be someone who will like it as well, and you'd be surprised at how many also like the same things. Take care and keep doing what you do, don't change who you are.

[@seantuck]

Thanks so much:)

[@fireceremony8573]

We're all better for you sharing and putting your very valuable thoughts and ideas out there and having the courage to be disliked. So that we can find the courage to be disliked too, and create art that is original and personal. Thank you for saying what you say, from a fellow INFJ (but type 5, so less of a people pleaser. :) )

[@insomnia224]

I’ve been following you for the past 4-5 years Sean and as always your advice and videos are second to none. As an introvert I find them hugely helpful and inspiring, thank you

[@joseerazevedo]

Do your things for you. There will be valuable critics as much as there will be false compliments. Exercise your discernment and listen to what matters, to what will make you grow. Discard the rest. When you take you off your work, whose is it? Don't. Or you'll be discarded even by yourself.

[@angelamaloney4871]

I love The Meaning In The Making.

[@seantuck]

Thank you:)

[@SeanMcGown]

Your use of the phrases, "..isn't there?" and "...isn't it?" made me feel that you are in this with the audience. It's been really rewarding to watch your evolution over the years. Keep doing it.

[@zoltanpuskas4722]

I always enjoy your videos and outlook on creativity. One of my favorite photographers, Cole Thompson, espouses "visual celibacy". Don't look at others work. Keep off social media. He has his own vision and he's helped me by "allowing" me to make the images I want to make as opposed to the images I think people will like (especially judges who judge my camera club monthly exhibitions). Mark me as one who liked your insightful book .

[@rogerwyatt3246]

I found this video to be eloquent, provocative, and incredibly useful. Courage, grit, or whatever we call it is vital in not only finding our voice but keeping it as well as changing direction at a later date. Best, Roger

[@nathanaclay3577]

This really resonates with me! I am also an enneagram 1 and INFJ. I also struggle with people pleasing. And it has affected my ability to make the art I want to make. Thank you for sharing!

[@alancoligado8540]

For me, it's more about the courage to be unlike any other, to take pride in one's uniqueness.

[@lindacoussement507]

Fellow INFJ who’s about to publish a book that’s a piece of my - uncompromised - soul here…I applaud your courage and bravery for staying true to yourself and for clearing the path for those who need it!

[@ValkiriStudio]

You're one of my favourite creators on the internet, Sean! I love the care and consideration you put into your work. Thank you for everything that you do!

[@seantuck]

Thanks so much.

[@wendystumbaugh695]

I could listen to you all day!

[@markuswipfler2995]

Great! Thanks for Sharing your thoughts.

[@TheReal-HopeBoykinDance]

Thank you as always for clarity. I have been working on a script which shares my truths and I am afraid it won’t be well received. “What if they don’t like my work” a literal quote from the script. It’s important to share it in my way and that should be enough. Thanks again.

[@hoagyguitarmichael]

Thanks for distilling something I have been thinking and talking about for years into a coherent, succinct 10 minutes. This concept explains why there is so much cookie-cutter work out there. Most people don't have the courage to put themselves out there to this level of vulnerability. I always try to remember: "Great artists are not remarkable for being the best example of a type, but for being the only example." David Travis - Photography Rediscovered

[@StillwatersFarm]

INFP here. I completely understand what you are saying. Excellent video, Sean. Please continue to create with courage.

[@MarcEllie31]

Beautiful photos at the end. Wow

[@denisesavage2382]

Appreciate that you are genuine and authentic to you. It matters.

[@seantuck]

Appreciate you saying so.

[@DarrenJSpoonley]

Wise words throughout this video and one that people should / need to rewatch time after time to help with the vision of being you !! Fantastic Sean !! Thanks for this

[@romiemiller7876]

A lot of the negativity is people being threatened by your writing. You push the buttons they don't want pushed. But those buttons are the ones they should pay attention to.

[@sylvesterowusu8135]

One of your best videos. Thank you!

[@anakinskywalker9752]

That's the message I want to listen. My personal attention on other's opinions, especially the negative ones usually put me into self-doubt, and reluctance in continuing the work, which eventually ends up in halfhearted result that even myself hates. It then incurs more criticism and becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy than I'm really not good enough. The firs step to break this vicious cycle is to be courageous and put out the best show I can.

[@3sixty2degres]

Yeah I’m stuck in a unhappy and lonely state loop since too many years exactly because I don’t have that courage to be disliked and yet I’m probably just as disliked trying to not disturb or trying to please as I would be taking a shot at living and creating the way I want to. If your video can help one person jump into the unknown you’ll have made it a successful video. So many things I know but can’t apply physically because of this fear of rejection or disturbing….

[@valhallafallen]

I having have the opportunity to read your book, but what you told about is what I love from your channel. That's why I cant be more agree with you with the concept of this video: The courage to be dislike. Thank you!

[@ricmondelli5846]

Sean, thanks for keeping it real, and keep up the great work!

[@sbai4319]

As a people pleaser I have had to face this challenge and focus on the work that matters and the people I care for.

[@thammertv]

Beautifully said. It’s so ingrained it’s sometimes hard to identify the behavior. A few years ago I gave up photography. Not because I didn’t enjoy it, but because I didn’t think I was good enough or that the medium was no longer relevant in the eyes of others. At the time I wasn’t even aware of my motivation!

[@MarkGilligan4]

Glad you stuck to your guns with the book, for me that's what made it all the more a pleasure to read.

[@antonblanke]

Love the woodland photography in the beginning. Playing with the shallow depth made them moody and somehow magic.

[@marcussachse9353]

Sean, your videos really help. I get to view them in some magical way at just the right time when I need advice or encouragement in my photographic journey. I’m soon leaving my day job as real eastate photographer and plunge into the deep end. We are leaving for long term travel to SE Asia, one main focus for me for me is kinda re-ignite my photography and do a creative introspection. Going to re-read your book before leaving, its just the right food for the brain to the occasion.

[@davidbrohede]

Thank you for keeping doing it, keeping creating. 🙏

[@JohnDoe-gb3zh]

Love this channel and this video is just excellent! Keep walking your own path!

[@RandomRotation]

I really needed to hear this. It’s something I already knew, but forgot about lately. Thanks Sean!

[@jnt6155]

Thanks again Sean for another inspirational talk! Your insights and experience are definitely guiding me on my creative journey ❤

[@karlkrebs4386]

Yes, we are all unique but you manage to stand out! I truly believe that you don't get the credit you deserve. Thank you!

[@Belchdragon]

The good thing with this book is that there are no exercises etc. It asks questions. That makes it so good. It makes the reader think. Hard.

[@codyandvictoria]

Loved this book and loved to hear your take on it. Always appreciate your deeper insights and willingness to do things differently. A good lesson and reminder. Hope you’re staying well!

[@MrCrazydave95]

Hey Sean! I’ve been a long time subscriber and I just want to thank you for how your videos have affected and improved my art!

[@seantuck]

You're very welcome:)

[@johnwyatt8844]

Love your videos Sean. Thank You

[@harrisueng]

This is such an important concept for everyone-in any endeavor. I've largely paved my own path, where my work has found it's own voice, and it's taken cultivating a perspective where the most important thing to me is if I feel I'm articulating my concept with some sense of clarity. Of course, it means less people understand the work, but I'm okay with that. Thank you for the reminder and for the clarity you share with us on the other side of YT-to help us in our own journeys. 💪🙌

[@geoffwickstrom]

Thank-you for sharing your art, creativity, and messages Sean - it all resonates deeply! As I’ve only recently begun exploring photography more seriously I’m definitely still learning techniques and attempting to emulate the photographers I admire, but this message is very freeing in terms of the path ahead 🙏

[@MyIndieSport]

Spot on! Your videos are inspirational, practical, and so very accessible. Thank you for sharing your wisdom and insights.

[@kenm.2240]

Wow what timing! I just started reading this book!

[@LePetitMondedeMichel]

Doing something of value is far more important than doing something to be like, if your creative endeavours are bigger than you, you are up to something. Searching for meaning is better than searching for approval.

[@LePetitMondedeMichel]

Sean your videos are always full of wisdom and a great source of inspiration.

[@seantuck]

Thank you:)

[@melvinshuster]

Thanks Sean. Just been thinking about this myself. Timely video. Best.

[@karlyostphotography]

Thanks, now I have yet another book to read! Loved this. You seem to always have a message/video pop up in sync with where my head space is at the moment.

[@innazaytsevaphoto]

Very strong piece . ♥ I like your approach -- there is no water, just a clear nice speech. Thanks a lot, Sean

[@MarkGilligan4]

The Courage to be Disliked is a great book, thanks for bringing it to my attention

[@EmilieH89]

Great advice. I love your book, and most recent video too. Thank you for all that you're offering!

[@JulieLandrieu]

Thank you for the lovely video and the book tip. And sharing again that it looks easy, but there is a lot of work behind it. INFP waving back.

[@-grey]

This is a great talk, man. 💪 Idk why I fear being disliked when I am already so broadly disliked. Maybe it's because I'm disliked for things I don't necessarily value, and I'd rather not add the things I care about to that criticism - but honestly, at this point it's like worrying about getting wet in the rain after just stepping out of the pool. 😂

[@photoferretuk1787]

Lol. I hear that.

[@kbstabs5982]

Thank you, Sean.

[@nickshepherd8377]

Thank you Sean…enlightening ⭐️⭐️⭐️

[@benharris3949]

The image with the “ask for Angela” sign 🥹🥹

[@MRSEDDERS]

Ah Sean this video is spot on for me. I’m constantly in this battle to build the courage to make the work I really want to make. Thank for making these videos, they really do help.

[@tolyaasch]

I found all Your words are exactly true for me! Thank you!

[@silentobservr]

Thanks for sharing 💯 I now understand why I always resonate with all your stories, I'm an INFJ myself. This video made me see, that what I've been doing with my photography, is not what I genuinely want, but what others think is the best way. Thanks for that inspiration

[@gregsimmons1709]

So on point… Thank you Sean!

[@raymondludlow5970]

love this, thank you

[@StriderLongbow]

The idea that it's about being brave once you've gotten to that point where you get are still learning ( for me that will never hopefully end ) but could now do what's in your heart and soul to create is very interesting. I aspire to find such courage. Thank you for the video and message.

[@Batch2103]

Excellent video Sean. I totally agree with your thoughts.

[@SammySantiagoIrizarry]

Thanks Sean! This is really inspirational and a Key to start a life of creativity in any Art form. Thanks Again!!!

[@a_design_guide]

Thank you for what you do. I’ve just started getting into photography and making videos and I find what you are doing very inspiring. So just wanted to say thank you and look forward to following your future work. Ben

[@DidiandHenry]

You're such a great inspiration Sean and possibly the most authentic and genuine person on KZbin - I really like you :) Your message in this video hits home with me. My partner and I are currently on a one your bike trip around the world, we’re filming the entire trip day-by-day and plan to produce a KZbin series about our journey. I work really hard at staying true to myself and to make my footage the way I see it - you help me do that. Thank you.

[@TommyNordpole]

When I create I need an audience, I do not chase the popularity, but I like to have a little feedback, good or bad. I am ready for anything. The worst for me is to be invisible. I enjoy every day of that road. Thank You Sean for another great video! :)

[@TheApparelLife]

Well done, Sean. Thank you.

[@lancegailyard9083]

Great content and thank you for sharing this.🙌🏾

[@Kevb69]

I really resonated with your wise words about courage and fear. Thank you Sean

[@SacredVStudio]

Lovely video and inspiring message, this is one I'll come back to again for sure!

[@deansdragon]

Perfect timing yet again.

[@jccarty1477]

Sean...please keep these coming. I prefer these thoughtful videos over tech or how to videos. Keep it up fella.

[@seantuck]

Me too;)

[@mikeysteam]

Thank you Sean

[@muhammadziaurrahman1289]

Sean, thank you for pointing out my biggest fear, i always love your work and your content, how you encourage me to be idealist and to build my own character Wish the best for you and keep making this kind of content