The CROW Reboot - A Long-Expected Failure | Cynical Reviews

[@CynicalReviews]

🔒Remove your personal information from the web at joindeleteme.com/CYNICAL and use code CYNICAL for 20% off 🙌 DeleteMe international Plans: international.joindeleteme.com Get Early Access to uncensored, ad-free version of videos by joining my Patreon or becoming a KZbin channel member. PATREON - www.patreon.com/CynicalReviews CHANNEL MEMBERSHIPS - kzbin.info/door/1DCPS2j-o0bvfIilkc8RSwjoin GODS AMONG MEN $20 Aziz Jiwani EXALTED LEGENDS $10 Boring AF Friendly Neighbourhood Bee Necromancer Matt Walsh KZbin MEMBERS Abqnurse 57 Ana María Hernández Boring AF Chris Hughes dominick comisse Edd Starr Joe Laura Hertzman pepega That Guy The Northern Irish Explorer TiyLum Uncle Nought William McArthur LEGENDS, DUDES & SUPPORTERS A Adrienn Gotz Alastair Oxby Alex Rivera Alicia Windsor Amanda Jean anemic4096 Anna Sams anonymous person Anthony Irving Ashley Elliott aura eyes Autocharth Batman Kills People Ben L. Bloody Ellen Lost boardsofcinema Bridgitte Neace Burnhard Cards Carla Hoffman Clarissa Wee Claus Pedersen Colton Courtney Schmitt Croc D Wilson Daniel Metcalfe Deborah English The Otter Eve Fona AL-mansour Freya Puszka Goetian_Owl gorbadoekie Hammer Hayden Barker Ian Jhon Sick Joe Schumacher John Wheaton Jon R Joseph Richardson Kai Koi Child Lady Zira Laughing Gremlin Leigh Reynolds Liam Liam Enteen Lindsey York lisa cruz Lord_Melonlord LoreTurtle Maple Leaf 21 matrix_909 Max matson Meghan Ruth Mercury Magenta Michael Barnes MissTick Monte moon lily Myra Mains Myuu chu Nicholas G. oliver mcwatters OneToxicPixel Oscar Medina Pascale Leonelli Patrick Stutt Paul Smith PhoenixFire PhotoRook Raul Alarcon Raven Wales Raven's Cry Ray40k RentEldDoor Rezzy Rin Rosie on Guitar Sergei Shannon Walker Sholto SilverPandaRei Simon Grützmacher SmilingWorlock Stands-In-The-Fire SteampunkSanic1 Stout Shako Swaggy_T Tiina tiredglow Tsar_Chidgrat TV Anthology Reviews Vanessa Abbott Wahoof the Cat William Ference Winter Buzzard YYEyes Zer0 Zichz ZombiePlayer1122 Zorai

[@jessetorres8738]

Cynical Reviews: When I hear the phrase "Quality over Quanity content," your channel is 1 of the 1st I think of.

[@abysscallstoabyss55]

I’ve missed you m*th*r f*ck*er!!! Good stuff!!! 👌🍻

[@Magniventris_moment]

I didn't know the Brits could marriages, but great on you old sport, been here since the old GOOP vid

[@elindayana8174]

Can you make a video about "Joker 2"? ❤

[@I_H_M_N]

It's millenials, not gen Z, stop projecting yourselfs onto us

[@davidci]

Unrelated to the reboot, but hearing that James O'Barr blames himself for writing the book and causing Brandon Lee's death is depressing. I hope he knows it's not his fault in any way, and he more than deserves the success of his book after the death of his own fiancee

[@JohnWilliams-cr2sz]

I believe I remember seeing in some more recent interviews and such that he has made peace with what happened and while still misses his friend, doesn't carry the guilt anymore.

[@BrickNewton]

Must be hard to deal with something like that, glad to hear he's finally getting some peace about it.

[@TheSpawnfan]

​@@JohnWilliams-cr2szGlad to hear it, it's tough losing a friend.

[@ahsatan8997]

Why can't Alec Baldwin learn? OH wait he was in charge of who was in charge of armory. So tragic all of it

[@basementdwellercosplay]

I can understand the guilt, but he truly has no reason to be the blame from Brandon's death considering he wasnt connected to the props

[@Rurike]

One bad performance points to a bad actor, multiple bad performances points to a bad director

[@luismarioguerrerosanchez4747]

Especially when the actors have been good in other roles

[@philtkaswahl2124]

Just like Hayden Christensen was mocked as Anakin in the prequels despite turning in great performances under other directors. I'm not deep into Lucas Bad as a lot of other Star Wars fans, but he's always been better at concepts and set pieces than directing character interaction.

[@nooneofimportance2110]

Just like the Firestarter reboot.

[@rosestar1324]

I didn't even think he was that bad. Maybe it's cuz I've seen worse that I had a different opinion when I first watched that movie. I saw Captain Marvel before the original Star Wars movies from decades ago.

[@notyourdaddude1957]

@@rosestar1324 Compared with Bradon Lee's performance in the original movie, it is very bad though. It barely express any emotions.

[@konata4567]

Hollywood needs to stop trying to recreate Joker. I MEAN IT! LET IT GO!

[@deathsyth8888]

Sometimes they hit some home runs in redoing the Joker (Cesar Romero, Jack Nicholson, Marc Hamel, Heath Ledger Joaquin Phoenix). Then they have their misses (Jared Leto, Joaquin Phoenix in Joker 2)

[@asackboyplush6508]

​@@deathsyth8888 you misspelled Mark Hamill

[@harlequinems]

Every time I see Jared Leto's 'Joker' I laugh about the idea that a hyperactive criminal psychopath has spent an hour in a tattoo artist's chair getting a stylised "ha ha ha" tattooed on his chest 😂

[@charmandyorton006]

Even the director of JOKER couldn’t recreate JOKER

[@ScrambledAndBenedict]

I love how they keep trying to recreate Joker, but when it came time to actually recreate Joker they gave us High School Musical with blood lmao

[@michaelsinger4638]

Making Eric and Shelly bond over drugs was such a baffling move? The original film had and anti-drug message if anything. -The gang that killed them was constantly high/strung out. -The main villain was a crime boss/drug dealer. -The subplot with Sarah and her addict mother. -Etc.

[@alzerbardoz1953]

I was also baffled by the fact that the film didn't kill them off until 45 minutes into the movie. Even if you're not a film critic and just an average man, you can tell that's beyond fucking stupid.

[@mischr13]

"they're dressed goth, they must be addicts!" - someone who made this, probably (and clearly doesn't know any goths)

[@shawklan27]

​@mischr13 Hollywood not understanding how the real world works isn't that shocking, to be honest. It's to be expected

[@basementdwellercosplay]

Considering the author wrote this after a drunk driver hit and killed his fiancé, it also feels in bad taste to O'Barrs comics and experiences

[@brokengirlsrus]

This!!!!!!!!!! Romanticizing drug use is just.... Not it

[@thefanwithoutaface8105]

The movie also lacks any of the dark, poetic style of the original. No haunting music, No intriguing dialogue like "Mother is the Name for Gods on the Lips and Hearts of All Children." The bad guys in the remake are so generic compared to the original, I remember T-Bird, Funboy, Skank, Tin Tin and Top Dollar, but I couldn't remember any remake bad guy to save my life. And Shelly is SOOOO BORING IN THIS MOVIE. In the original she seemed like a genuinely sweet, lovely person who you could understand Eric fighting to avenge. Shelly in the remake acts like she's stoned all the time and every time I see that blank look on her face I'm left wondering why anyone would fight to avenge her.

[@Jokoko2828]

Shelly in the original was an ideal, in the remake she is, as you said, not really worth avenging.

[@Shenaldrac]

And as if that wasn't bad enough she's also _British!_

[@HonkeyKongLive]

T-Bird had the best dialogue in the movie. "One of my crew got himself perished. Tin Tin, somebody stuck his blades in all his major organs in alphabetical order."

[@GothWolfRants]

@@HonkeyKongLiveWell gentlemen, by all means I think we ought to have an introspective moment of silence for poor ol’ Tin Tin. *SNNNNNNNFFF!*

[@nightmarefanatic1819]

​@@GothWolfRants Which is my counter to the comment you're responding to as Top Dollar had the best lines in the move. "YOU FEEL LIKE A LITTLE WORM ON A BIG FUCKING HOOK? Well your mama must be DAMN PROUD!" "CAW CAW BANG FUCK I'M DEAD!" "He's already boring the shit out of me KILL HIM." Albrecht is also full of great lines. "At least he didn't do any of that walking away in the wind shit. I hate that."

[@JuniperJadePR]

Given that there are about 14 other Crow stories that aren't about Eric, it's disappointing that studios keep revisiting the same story instead of adapting one of those. Iris Shaw hunting down the terrorists who killed her while her body falls apart, Mark forgoing revenge to rescue his kids from human traffickers, a detective teaming up with a Crow who is literally a child in order to find a serial killer...there's just so much material to work with.

[@nightmarefanatic1819]

A Holocaust victim killing the Nazis that ran the camp he was in.

[@JuniperJadePR]

@@nightmarefanatic1819 That one too! It would make for a tense thriller.

[@thomasraines1396]

@@nightmarefanatic1819not just the guards, according to what I read he was going to seek revenge on the nearby town for standing by and doing nothing.

[@dakotamedina5920]

​@thomasraines1396 yep, at the end of skinning of the wolves, he tells one of the prisoners that's where he's going

[@thomasraines1396]

@@dakotamedina5920 see? That would’ve been cool. Each of the individual Crow stories are worth their own film I think.

[@Some_Guy_8888]

Congrats on being not dead.

[@charly03090309]

unalive

[@FH4Player6397]

@@charly03090309 NO

[@David-Yams]

Watching too many Velma sends bro to a five months coma

[@AceofSpadesWTF]

Congrats on having zero patience, you can't rush art

[@marocat4749]

The dog brought him back. Married

[@thefanwithoutaface8105]

Worst thing about this movie is that they specifically used Eric Draven and Shelly as the characters even though they are in name only. There are dozens of other Crows they could've used but they went with Eric specifically because of the previous movie. Ironically the film might've done slightly better if he wasn't Eric.

[@NINJAfries07]

Realistically, they could’ve just made their own original character to inherit the title of The Crow. Still wouldn’t have fixed the lackluster writing, though

[@runningcommentary2125]

I don't think any tinkering with the characters could have saved this movie.

[@sandy120]

I kind of agree, we've had crow sequels before and they're all a bit lacklustre but as fans of the original we kind of gave them a pass. Just name the characters bob and Alice and it still wouldn't be a good movie, but at least it wouldn't be an offensive one.

[@aubreymorgan9763]

@@NINJAfries07 c'mon...none of these modern media make a new character when there is one much loved and revered character they can destroy

[@NINJAfries07]

@ I never said it was likely. Just that it was possible…

[@mish375]

I think that something people forget is that Sarah's relationship with Eric is crucial to giving him humanity amidst his revenge quest. It says a lot about him and Shelley taking care of this girl who has been neglected when no one else would. Eric also genuinely cares about Sarah and wants to protect her, which gives the finale act immense weight. He's able to save someone he loves while getting justice for Shelley.

[@biltrex]

So much this. Their friendship is so sweet and heartbreaking. Eric and Shelly were the substitute parents for the ones she clearly didn’t have, and she loses THEM too. But Eric is there for her even after death, bringing her mom back to life in a way. She is a key role, in her own way and also for what it reflects about Eric. I just don’t know how you even try this story without her.

[@antithoughtpolice7497]

It's one thing that puts the movie above the comics, in it's own right. Sarah and Daryl are miles better than their counterparts in the comics, and are beacons of hope in this hopeless city.

[@mish375]

@@biltrex Exactly. Eric makes sure that Sarah isn't left alone and attempts to give her mother a wake up call so she will actually be a parent. Ignoring this entire plotline takes away from the film and its characters.

[@ElvistheAlien]

happy to see you make a return

[@justaguyonyoutube4592]

Lmao didn’t you defend Shadman.

[@spookieboogi6161]

I used to love your channel then you defend a man who drew violent pictures of real girls

[@litneyloxan]

@@spookieboogi6161its more upsetting to me that shadman drew children sexually rather than violence.

[@asackboyplush6508]

Get lost

[@ThaBotmon]

@@spookieboogi6161 Then unsubscribe and move on, stop being a snowflake

[@thefanwithoutaface8105]

This movie was a next level insult to me as I became a Crow fan in College after I stumbled upon it by accident and even met James O'Barr a while back. Everything about the movie sucks Eric and Shelly were normal people who were murdered simply because of wrong place, wrong time or to be made an example. Shelly in the remake is a drug addict who went to the bad guy for more drugs and saw something she shouldn't and dragged Eric into her bullshit, not that that was much better. Eric as the Crow is intimidating, powerful, poetic and also tragic, once he puts the make up on you know he's gonna wreck people's shit. Remake Eric is a massive wuss who spends the whole movie crying, getting high or getting his ass kicked even when he gets the full powers of the Crow. The movie isn't even tragic. Shelly and Eric's deaths in the original were horrifying and brutal, to where you could believe the universe would offer up some form of divine retribution. In the remake, it's just bags over their heads and that's it. It's so bland you honestly are left wondering, why these two deserve revenge over anyone else.

[@JavaBum]

Pretty much like the RoboCop remake. This is why these movies need to be left alone.

[@adammartin5809]

Ernie Hudson was correct. Brandon Lee is The Crow. Props to Ernie Hudson for being real and nice.

[@Mickey-Knox]

He was wrong. Brandon Lee was Eric Draven.

[@starkillersneed]

Goth millenials' very own James Dean

[@ramencat788]

@@Mickey-Knox They know but he is basically the face of The Crow, no other remake or reboot will ever replace his version no matter how many they make. Brandon is what we think of when we think The Crow.

[@JohnWilliams-cr2sz]

What really pisses me off about this movie is that it was so bad it's probably killed any chance of other Crow movies being made. There is so much potential for good stories there that was wasted by their piss poor attempt to retell Eric's story rather than do something original or try to adapt one of the other Crow comics. I would kill for a period piece Crow movie. Something set in like Victorian London or the old west. That could have been amazing.

[@LoveProWrestling]

No.

[@JohnWilliams-cr2sz]

@@LoveProWrestling You are welcome to that opinion.

[@nightmarefanatic1819]

Yeah, there's one set in a Nazi Concentration camp during the Holocaust. This is the perfect franchise for people to be able to add their own characters and stories since O'Barr has established that Eric isn't the only Crow, and this company decided to TRY to remake Eric's story (which is honestly just them creating their own thing but pretending it's the original protagonist and love interest TBH.) And yeah, Imy definitely of the "I'd take a good Crow movie with a different character" mindset, but it all the other attempts have been made by hacks who want name recognition instead of actually liking the franchise.

[@bettyunicorn6132]

Old West Crow sounds amazing

[@JohnWilliams-cr2sz]

@@bettyunicorn6132 I know, right!

[@MrFutago87]

Personally I don't think The Crow is entirely the legacy of Brandon Lee (the movie I mean the comic of course is James O Barr). However I think Eric Draven is the legacy of Brandon Lee. He gave life to that role and when you think Eric Draven the character you think Brandon Lee. See for as bad as the sequels were they at least had the right idea and have different main characters with their own stories, those stories were bad sure but they didn't pretend to be the original all over again at least. And I do think there is potential for other stories to be told in the universe. Just off the top of my head how about someone who gets resurrected to get revenge as per usual but then he fails, something happens in where the subjects of the main characters revenge die before he can kill them. And now he is immortal forever with no point to his existence needing to find a reason to live afterwards and I just wrote a Highlander movie there didn't I?

[@deathsyth8888]

"There can only be ONE! (Long pause) Crow that is.'

[@ibrahimihsan2090]

So animations and what not are good ways to revive the franchise, yes?

[@harlequinems]

The writers saw the FunBoy and Darla relationship and thought "what a beautiful love story, we should make them the main characters"

[@muhammadeisa1459]

Lol best comment!

[@aliasfakename3159]

What's annoying is that the comics establish that the Crow is a mantle that different people can take on. If a loved one was murdered unfairly and you want vengeance, the crow spirit appears and gives you another chance. If they changed the name Bill Skarsgard's character to "Josh" or something, the backlash would've been less negative

[@jessetorres8738]

Cynical Reviews: When I hear the phrase "Quality over Quanity content," your channel is 1 of the 1st I think of.

[@wolfhawk1999]

All they had to do was change the name of the main characters. The Crow is a mantle, not a person. They could have created a unique story with a known property and everyone would be happy. But no, they had to try and piss on the original

[@georgeray1906]

Yeah it so simple, I mean for goodness even the terrible sequels had a different main character to be The Crow.

[@ScrambledAndBenedict]

Honestly, I don't know why they even made The Crow at all. The movie is so different that, as a Crow movie it's insulting, but as its own original creation it actually had a chance. The Crow doesn't have a monopoly on vengeful ghosts, and if they had just done an original story they wouldn't have been shackled to elements of The Crow that they had to add but didn't work. An agent of Satan kills two people, an angel empowers one to stop that nonsense in exchange for a second chance at life, shit happens, the end -- it's a bit cliche, yeah, but then they're free to embrace things that don't work with The Crow like saving her life in the end, the pro-drug message, etc.

[@nightmarefanatic1819]

It still would have been a bad movie, but st least it wouldn't have been an enraging movie.

[@AnvilPictures]

@@ScrambledAndBenedictI have a feeling that the names of the characters weren’t originally Eric or Shelly but studio executives were like it has to be a remake without realizing that the implication is much more likely to lose them money. Any sane person would have said something about doing Eric and Shelly. I work on film sets we are just as human as anyone else and would know that this was a poor move. It was definitely something out of their control

[@ScrambledAndBenedict]

@@AnvilPictures I can definitely believe that. I find it to be a real shame, too. It's like they are so scared of losing money that they sabotage themselves. Ever play Chess against a noob who's so scared to lose pieces he won't take the risks necessary to win? It's like that. I actually think the move going forward to unfuck Hollywood is to devote to doing several riskier, lower-budget movies rather than one high-budget one: at least then, you really only need one of them to be a box-office hit to recoup the loss of the others.

[@MrFutago87]

All that water imagery made me think of a quote of Roger Ebert about Battlefield Earth's Dutch angles "the director, Roger Christian, has learned from better films that directors sometimes tilt their cameras, but he has not learned why". Just replace the tilted cameras with water and Roger Christian with Rupert Sanders.

[@elmoisred616]

I just want to throw out there, it wasn't just senseless and brutal violence from the gangsters in the original movie, they targeted Shelly's apartment because she was standing up for tenants rights for that building, the same building that top dollar was trying to get everyone evicted so he could take over.

[@NaveeSeal]

I feel like if they wanted to incorporate a deity, instead of Kronos, they could've used The Morrigan from Irish mythology. 1: there's the fact she is often represented through crows, obvious connection there 2: she is heavily associated with war, fate, doom, and death. Fitting Eric's quest very well as he is waging his own war against those who have irreparably wronged him by killing both him and his girlfriend. It would essentially be like how Spiderman has Anansi and Batman has Barbatos

[@spiceupyourafterlife]

I was just watching the original film and even having watched it a hundred times since I was a teen, I'm always blown away by its gothic atmosphere, brilliant acting, and amazing soundtrack, not to mention its attention to detail (if you've read the comic book, you know what I mean). It feels like it was a movie made with so much love and respect for its original source material. This movie feels like it was made with just as much love and respect for money.

[@ramencat788]

And that’s why it upset so many of us but we were called dramatic crybabies.

[@BlazePiffington]

When I saw the crow looking like Dante from the DMC remake… I knew all hope was lost

[@Not_An_EV]

Unpopular opinion but the remake Dante wasn't a bad design. It was just for the wrong character. If DMC had been it's own separate game and not a remake it would have received a lot more praise. Plus it's the only DMC game with a decent Virgil campaign 😂

[@598019001]

@@Not_An_EV Yah, I could agree with that. A lot of the problems comes from how much time everyone spent with the older dante look, and then one of the first things we see of this new dante was that stupid wig scene that essentially had new dante spit on the old dante look. Did not feel respectful.

[@greenhowie]

Donte plz

[@monstermashthecat]

Same

[@flaccidpancake2614]

As someone who for some reason became extremely hyperfixated on that game the character of rogue felt very similar to mundus, at least that video game had a clear story that ties up by the end, this movie feels like it was written by ai at points

[@redwolfe7049]

I know the actor who played Tin Tin in the OG Crow movie at my old job. I didn't even know it was him(Laurence Mason but we called him Larry) until someone told me but I never mention The Crow to him because I figured it was a sensitive issue to him.

[@nanopanda]

9:15 Its a lot like black panther and chadwick boseman. It feels wrong to just..."make a new black panther" That being said, only an earnest adaptation would be fair. I don't think roles/characters can be specifically reserved to one person, but to dig up the role for only for money and not because there's a love for the story being told, its always gonna crash.

[@anubusx]

Damn Ernie Hudson looks amazing for his age

[@tiffanywyatt5137]

It's very sad to think a character can't be made with somebody else. Very close minded. Y'all are really at the point where you honor the character more than the person

[@Elora445]

I agree and not. The Black Panther is a name not just for Boseman's character. He is not the only one that has used it, hence it should be okay to be played by anyone else. T'Challa though, that's another case. That would feel just as bad as someone other than Brandon Lee play Eric Draven.

[@EpicJasonX9000]

And yet Lionsgate still isn’t learning it’s lesson because they’re moving forward with their poorly written remake of my most favorite movie ever made: Highlander. I read the premise and it just sounds awful.

[@Asher-oo4bb]

Waste of Henry Cavill and Dave Bautista

[@marocat4749]

Damn, hopefully they cam salvage something there as actors

[@LoveProWrestling]

I am just learning of this, here, now, for the first time. I hate the world more for having this wretched information in my head. Thanks.

[@greenhowie]

Lionsgate shouldn't be let near good movies. There's persistent rumours of Back to the Future and Akira remakes, really hope a better studio ends up with those projects.

[@crimsondynamo615]

Highlander hasn’t suffered enough after the quickening and the source. Why do they keep doing this to Highlander?

[@GiNJAH006]

Congrats on your engagement!! That's a super exciting next step in your life!

[@thecaptain6845]

Why even go with Eric Draven? Almost every original comic run of The Crow has a different protagonist, and the sequel films even made up characters that didn't exist in the source material. And that's not even touching on the rebooted continuities; how cool would it be to have the unnamed Crow who (alongside his wife and daughter) was killed by Nazis and goes on a warpath against entire platoons? Hell, if you're releasing it around the 30th anniversary of the 1994 film, why not an anthology film with different Crows that spans centuries?

[@petriew2018]

The original Crow worked so well because of what they did in between the action scenes. Brandon Lee's Eric Draven is a man driven by pain and revenge, sure, but he still makes the time to talk to people. He'll go out of his way to help Sara because he still cares, he'll share a beer with the cop who tried to help him and Shelly because he appreciates it even if the guy ultimately failed, he'll crack a few dark jokes because he's not the kind of person who wants everyone to feel his pain, only the people who deserve it... you don't need to see an hour of his convoluted back story to root for the guy, you get it on an emotional level. He's a good person and what happened to him is so totally not fair, that's all you need to know. The Crow isn't an especially deep story. It's not about the twists and turns of the narrative or the shocking reveal at the end. It's a story about emotional trauma and how it effects people. The first movie understood this very well. The grungy gothic noire of the production designed is there to enhance all these negative emotions that drive the story. It's not supposed to be realistic, and the film fully commits to the surrealism to keep the audience in the right mood. It draws you in to a dark and violent world populated by messed up people so you can feel good when these people get what they deserve. The actors 100% sell this in pretty much every performance, they're either just bad people or trying to find some peace in a messed up world. They don't really need to be much more because we all get it emotionally. In the end the good guys gets his revenge, the bad guys face justice, and the good people finally find some peace... and the rain literally stops. And it works because you're left feeling good about it, you just sat through an uncomplicated, heartfelt emotional roller coaster that leaves you emotionally satisfied. Cheesy? maybe, but it's a movie, so is that a problem? All that was entirely absent from the remake. They spent too much time trying to force you to like some pretty awful people without ever giving you a reason to like them. Then it dump a metric ton of ultimately uninteresting supernatural crap in your lap. Then it's an hour of a mopey goth kid carving up faceless stuntmen.... it's both needlessly over-complicated while also being completely surface level. There is basically no emotion in this film, which is why it's kind of an insult to the source material. You strip out the emotion and it's just another generic action movie.

[@lagspresso]

21:50 Deadpool did the sequential relationship destruction perfectly.

[@cometark42]

I wouldn't say perfectly but it was miles above this.

[@DETRACT0RD00M]

Deadpool & Wolverine was the worst Deadpool by far.. hey, remember Marvel; Ryan Reynolds quip; hey, remember this superhero; Ryan Reynolds quip and Hugh Jackman actually acting; the (shitty) end

[@lagspresso]

@@DETRACT0RD00M tf are you on about

[@DETRACT0RD00M]

@@lagspresso garbage

[@dwilson9546]

Eric isn't the main character in 1994 The Crow. What do we know about him? He plays guitar, looks damn fine in leather, and is totally devoted to Shelly. What do we know about Shelly? She's artistic, likes to take pictures, adopted Sarah as a little sister, adores her cat, loves Eric, she's not the best cook, and couldn't wait to be a glowing bride on her wedding day. She was a generous, happy person. But she died. She's the main character, and everything that follows her death is Eric being devoted to getting her justice. He retrieves her ring, kills everyone that hurt her, helps Sarah with her home life because Shelly loved Sarah, thanks the cop that stayed with her so she wouldn't die alone and takes his pain from the memories away, then uses the pain of Shelly's death to defeat the crime lord. Shelly's death starts the story and her return ends it.

[@anibal5845]

Beautifully well put. I'm splitting hairs, but I would say Shelly is the most important character, the emotional center of the story. Eric is still the main character, it's his pain we sympathize with immediately and we share his catharsis when he's reunited with Shelly. Still, awesome point.

[@MissCookieThief]

The protagonist isn't necessarily the most fleshed-out character, it's just the character we follow and the one whose actions drive the plot. Shelly is an important character and acts as the motivating force for Eric, but Eric is clearly the protagonist. Eric is the one we follow, Eric is the one who decides to seek justice, etc. It's Eric's actions we centre on and Eric's actions that drive the plot.

[@ShatteredAutomaton]

​@@anibal5845 I would have to agree as we don't follow Shelly, we follow Eric on his borderline scorched earth quest for vengeance. We get to know Eric as intimately as we can as he changes his personality a bit after becoming the Crow for obvious reasons. The character we follow is the main character.

[@alicianelson1252]

And she was killed for no reason as if to say if you are a good person this cruel world will end you thus giving Eric as the crow a reason to exists there was no purpose to her being killed so it's like the the world lost something the remake gives her death a purpose but in doing so removes the tragedy

[@guyonyoutube501]

I think you're a bit confused about what a main character is.

[@tumppuman]

Side note... Does Rob Zombie take his wife everywhere?! 😂

[@gRinchY-op5vr]

Yes, that's how she ends up in his movies 😂

[@brandonmclendon5368]

The only good thing about this movie is that nobody died while making it. Plus they went through extra preventative measures to make sure a repeat of Brandon Lee didn’t happened.

[@leewright1]

Missed out a crucial word there dude.

[@markc1793]

The big thing for me was that in the original you really felt how in love Eric and Shelly were, even though we didn't really see them together. The horror of how they were so brutally murdered because they were good people, trying to help others and stand up to the gangs, just before their wedding. In the remake we got two drug addicts, one of whom murdered someone under the big bads control, so i don't really feel any connection or sympathy for either of them. Apparently they're in love, but it's hard to accept it as being that deep when it seems like they've only known each other a week or two. We also get some comically over the top bad guy with evil mind control super powers, and that's not even mentioning how cringe worthy all the tattoo's were. Not only did the remake fail miserably at making Eric and Shelly seem like good people we should care about, they dragged out trying to do it for so long, the original basically did all of that in ten minutes.

[@henrygambles3652]

Thank you for coming back to tear this garbage apart! Such as shame that a piece of art that started as therapeutic became some commercialized slop!

[@Hepheat75]

Absolutely loved the part where the guy said, "It's crowing time!" before crowing all over the place.

[@Anonymous_Individual]

Return of the King!

[@jesusagelvis4917]

Congratulations for the wedding.

[@ValeriyApocalypse]

CJ IS BACK YAY This is another example of modern day adaptation/reboot culture where screenwriters just write their own fanfiction of an original media, changing and misinterpreting stuff left and right thinking they're more clever than the original author. This is not "this is my personal take on this story" but more a "Look at how clever I am I made it better!" and thus these movies and tv series deserves to be shit upon.

[@KremBotop]

This movie is the ultimate definition of "who asked for this?!" Glad you're back.

[@tapinewoods3937]

Well at least Momoa was going to work with James O'barr which actually showed how he was into the project while he did read the source material and said he loved it when he was young. The CROW test footage that he did is many times better then what we got. Rest in peace Brandon, you were too young to leave us.

[@Hollyberrystreats]

Momoa is much betting casting...

[@luhrsen8105]

00:21:22 That's not fair. Kermit is an amazing writer.

[@alzerbardoz1953]

THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR TEARING THIS GUANO APART!!!!!

[@rons_seb]

I am a black woman

[@FH4Player6397]

@@rons_seb No one cares buddy.

[@MaskedMike]

38:16 for real? This was the best ending out of 20 other options? Oh God, just imagine how horrendous the others must've been for THIS to be considered "the best one"

[@TheAdarkerglow]

When people say that it was really a movie 'of its time', there are few things that'd be more appropriate to call to memory than 'The Crow'. The wonky effects add to the sensation that you're watching something independent, which lends to the goth/industrial/underground aesthetic of the film. Then there's the death of Brandon Lee, which lends to the cult fandom, and his idolization by goth teens. You can't make a big budget reboot of that.

[@easolinas1233]

Glad to see you again! As for the movie, I saw the original film recently, and it holds up beautifully. The remake misses everything that made it so compelling, beautiful and viciously, bloodily haunting, and just lacks any soul or rawness or earnestness. It's a cold, soulless corporate product, through and through.

[@Itcouldbebunnies]

This one goes straight into the "Look how they massacred my boy"-top 10 together with The Mummy (2017), A Nightmare on Elm Street (2010), The Wicker Man (2006), The Karate Kid (2010), Point Break (2014), Robin Hood (2018), Taxi (2004), The Grudge (2020), and all Disney live-action remakes (they only get one spot because). Quite the achievement! Bill Skarsgård was also terrible in John Wick 4 btw, are we sure he's not just an overrated actor? PS Congratulations to you and your lucky...lady? Gentleman? Pet rock? Jk, cheers!🥳🥂

[@freereinvoltaic]

@39:35 Congratulations!!! 🍾🎉🎊 It was the Raycon ad that got her. I told you it was gold!

[@TheWosniakGambit]

And the soundtrack. The soundtrack to the original is amazng. Big Empty, Golgatha Tenement Blues, etc. Good stuff

[@DTylerFultzVA]

I saw someone describe the whole "Shelly situation" in this movie as "the opposite extreme to Fridging". With "Fridging", you have someone whose sole purpose for existence is just to die and motivate the main character, while they get no real personality or defining traits. It's shallow and dehumanizing at its core. BUT... On the other extreme, this character (Shelly) who shouldn't be that important to the story now takes up a good chunk of it, to the point they steal the spotlight from the titular character and needlessly pad out the story.

[@evanhanley6437]

The original is 30 years old and it TRULY is a classic. Brandon Lee gave it his all. Nothing will ever top it. I'm glad its become a cult classic.

[@grfrjiglstan]

“Why does he have all those mannequins in his apartment?” He wears a jacket that says “Goon” on it. Connect the dots.

[@thejon93rd]

The Crow: City of Angels is more worthy of being talked about than this reboot. The amount of footage the Weinsteins cut from it, and the way they forcefully took final cut away from the director (who basically made every music video for The Cure), is tragic. I believe City of Angels would have been terrific if it had been released as the filmmakers intended. Thankfully the film has a lot of hallmarks which made the original a classic, such as a first-rate soundtrack/score and a fantastically moody atmosphere, but it's a shame we haven't seen a proper director's cut for it yet.

[@Sisren86]

I might get murdered for saying this...but even though Brandon absolutely nails it as Eric, Vincent Perez as Ashe is actually my favorite film Crow, and City of Angels in its original form may have become my favorite of the franchise if not for the interference. Original obviously takes top spot overall in the reality we live in, though.

[@allyturner147]

39:40 WHAAAAT CONGRATS!!!!!!

[@basementdwellercosplay]

From what I've heard from former drug users, the main relationship would not have lasted as relationships based in recovery from or using drugs isn't a good foundation for any relationship. Trying to make their relationship something thats is beautiful and true love like in the original film or comic is odd considering most relationships like this wont last. Again I dont have experience in this but this is from people who have

[@ReverieOfThorns]

Yeah, you're right, it wouldn't. Seen it happen to someone who was a recovering alcoholic. Just doesn't work. Also, the original The Crow is amazing, one of my favorite movies of all time. This remake was....hot garbage sitting under the sun for days on end. Just so so bad.

[@arnold20139]

Congratulations on the engagement! Hope you two have a bright future..🎉

[@Shenaldrac]

No one who is not at least two generations removed and very out of touch says "the young people today." Telling me you want to update something to appeal more to "the young people today" tells me you have no idea what young people (also known as "people", btw) like at all.

[@SethDeir-l1r]

Congrats on the engagement

[@jaden3602]

It could’ve been in the same UNIVERSE as the Crow. He’s not THE Crow, but another person with similar powers. But no, they had to be disrespectful for money and make this piece of crap

[@thomasraines1396]

Hell, there’s several other people who take up the mantle in the comics. They could’ve easily used any of them, but they wanted to use Eric and Shelly’s story because people know it.

[@Herne0011]

Thank you from the bottom of my heart for showing the original such respect. As a result of the remake I will never watch anything done by Sanders or starring Bill Skarzshnitzel in it again. They both knew this was a poison chalice but took a big gulp from it. Now it will follow both of them for the rest of their hopefully short careers. The only silver lining is that they didnt involve Nick Cave - because it would have been even worse than it turned out to be. There are few things that should not be redone - but this movie was one of them. PS congrats on the wedding :).

[@Gyaruwitch4011]

Welcome back King!!

[@lewilbur]

2:11 it's always halloween in my heart! 🎃🦇

[@natebush8217]

"Where you're going, everyday is Halloween!!!" (Al Simmons, Spawn) 😆 🎃

[@Lhunweth]

Lol came here to post exactly that 🐈‍⬛🎃🖤

[@mikebirks2336]

The best thing I learnt in this video was about the comic, the history of the original movie and the wedding announcement. Congratulations!!!!!! 🎉

[@Rick586]

I've heard of The Crow and all I knew about it was that it was the movie that Bruce Lee's son died during its filming. I'd assumed it was just a generic, edgy superhero movie and didn't give it much thought. Turns out I was actually predicting this reboot. Congrats on getting married, BTW!

[@alexdoorn234]

Pfft you should give the original a try now that you hopefully know better, it is a very gothic movie which I adore.

[@TwistedChungus]

Definitely recommend giving the original [and, frankly, also the spinoff 'sequel' movies] at least a peek. They definitely have plenty of EDGE to them... but the edge feels... I don't know, ''earned'' might be the best word I can think of. The sort of edge that makes sense for the story, and makes things feel *better*, rather than being there for the sake of being there.

[@Avarn388]

Nice to see you, man. I normally try not to celebrate movies bombing but I am so happy this new one bombed. Souless is what I'd describe it. If this was its own thing, it would be meh but the fact it was trying to do Eric Draven's story yet again is insane. Brandon lee was Eric Draven. The original Crow is a phenomenal film; with an engaging story, compelling characters and one beautiful soundtrack. What's funny is that Alex Proyas, the director, just kept retweeting those reviews of the new one critical of it because he was against this. The thing is that if the studio had wanted to do another crow movie but focus on someone other than Eric, fine. The crow has had other incarnations but nope they couldn't help themselves. Glad this thing failed.

[@cowboyquebecanimations3068]

At the OG director, said hey don't send threats to everyone, just say it sucked

[@Kirby0189]

Congrats on the marriage announcement, man!

[@thatonkgau5221]

This movie is absolute hot garbage that tries to be dark and mature but just comes off as just angsty. In the original Eric and Shelly were like high school sweet hearts that bonded over there love for music and soon fell in love and got engaged. They were tragically brutally killed just for being in the wrong place at the wrong time. In the reboot there drug addicts that meet in rehab and bond over their love for drugs. They were killed because Shelly saw some shady stuff she wasn't supposed to see and got Eric involved in her shit. Instead of them being two innocent people that were victims of a random act of violence. There two messed up junkies that got themselves caught up in a criminal conspiracy and ended up dead. The relationship is less sweet, endering and tragic and more boring, bland and edgy for the sake of it.

[@amilcarmusah4218]

That's why I never liked the original (my favorite part is the City of Angels). This is a gothic for teenage girls, a naive and vanilla fairy tale. The new film just asserts the idea that there are no innocents.

[@HonkeyKongLive]

More than anything else it drives me insane how they tried to add that whole "sacrifice to achieve immortality" thing to the villain. A huge part of the original is that the attack was random, showing the bleakness of the city. The vengeance wasn't going to save humanity, it wasn't against a villain doing the devils work. Just violent thugs in a city full of violent thugs.

[@katietaylor8314]

I actually saw this thing on opening night (I was bored and needed an outing). The part that aggravated me the most was how goddamn SLOW it is. It feels like it takes two thirds of the runtime before he FINALLY starts on the revenge thing. Before that it's either Love Story or him just kind of screwing around. And I agree with the people saying there are other Crow stories they could have adapted - I read one about a female Crow taking revenge on a gang of white supremacists who blew up her daycare centre, so she's avenging the children she wasn't able to protect.

[@Jartran72]

1:45 ad skip button

[@YoullClapWhenImGone]

Thank You :)

[@SariahCupp-lx3xd]

Cynical Reviews is back!!!!!

[@OfficialAshArcher]

To paraphrase Boromir… the crow doesn’t have a remake. The crow needs no remake. Brandon Lee was good enough, as was the film, the first time around.

[@CrypticCharm]

what really bothered me, as a massive fan who was a goth teen in the 1990s, so yet i latched onto the original, so hard. was the "crowing up" scene. in the original, Burn by the Cure. in the remake, the song, the balls to the wall, bring on the carnage...was Enya! who the hell thought "Oh yeah, ultra violence, let's go for Enya"

[@Sisren86]

The weird thing is that it fit, though. Its actually the one scene that felt like it had some sort of coherance to the source material. The song would have been amazing to just keep playing all the way through the opera scene...but no, they completely ruined even that with an opera song (nothing inherently wrong with opera, mind you) that didn't even fit the scene.

[@slamg4618]

Glad you’re back man!

[@jim-bob3093]

In a werid twist i think one thing the bad sequals did right, is that none of them recast Lees role. The lead isnt Eric Draven. Cause the moniker of the Crow can be inherited by others in Ashe Corven and Jimmy Cuervo when the spirit of the Crow revives them. Hell, if they had played their cards right, 2024 could imply Lee is the spirit of the Crow itself when reviving a new lead

[@GrumpyGil]

Great video! Been a while since I've seen you, and it's great to see a return to form. Also, congratulations on the marriage!

[@windraizou]

Welcome back, king, always a treat to see you upload Edit: AAAAA CONGRATS!

[@johnjamesleahy4065]

1:46 after all the air was let out of the balloon, after all my excitement disappeared, and after the topic of the video was erased from my memory...i can finally begin to watch!!! This Barney Revival is going to be unreal! I heard they finally got the rights back for that iconic song, "...I love you, you love me..."

[@sandraroehrig9142]

Awesome review and Congratulations!!! 🎉❤

[@redcyberdragon29]

Thanks!

[@needbettername8583]

"Victims? Aren't we all?" -The people who paid to see this movie

[@solidskullz5736]

Just like this matrix, the first movie was pretty damn good, but the sequels ended up being complete and utter shit. The reboot it just the icing on the cake, just fails the original in every way and makes you remember that the series is just marred with tragedy

[@calebpribyl5152]

@@solidskullz5736 I haven’t seen the other matrix sequels but I do know that they used linkin park’s music in one of their movies!

[@deathsyth8888]

The sequels got bloated and was crushed under the weight of it's own lore, over encumbrance of it's philosophical babble and the action/special effects just being there for it's own sake without being more of an integrated connection to the main characters/story. That highway chase scene was cool and all but was it worth it for the significant screen time it had in the movie?

[@kingofravens215]

Congratulations on the engagement man!

[@ramencat788]

Thank you for mentioning James’ backstory that inspired it. Not many shed light to it. I cried watching the video where he spoke on it.

[@nootnoot5648]

A CYNICAL VIDEO OMGGGG IM SO EXCITED

[@mrdeatheli]

Thank you for this! I will never watch it, but was waiting for an essay like this. I appreciate all your hard work and the sacrifice you made to watch this trap. Cheers!

[@NINJAfries07]

🎊 Congratulations on the wedding! I hope you and your family have a wonderful life 🎉

[@wwe682]

I definitely agree that making the crow like an animated series and or movie would make a little bit more sense. Like a great example would be that Terminator anime that came out this year which in my honest opinion is a really good watch.

[@bartoszdulas1703]

Lionsgate: We decided to make a re-adaptation of the original comic book, hence why we decided to not adapt it. Mike O. Barr: Yeah, my girlfriend's death is the second worst thing that happened to me

[@zellie9]

congrats on you getting engaged! may you and your partner have the best time of your lives! geluk aan die hele familie en mag julle net gelukkig wees met die pad vorentoe ❤

[@jamesbounds]

Good to see you back.

[@Alex-cw3rz]

I find it bizarre that the 1994 movie which had a budget of 23 million dollars or 48 million in todays money. Looks significantly better to look at, with much more interesting shots and colour grading than the 2024 one with a 50 million budget. Surely they should be on par, or with technology a significantly better 2024 one. But as you said it feels a little too clean and unrealistic. A lot of modern movies I've noticed don't look good, just in the simple terms of pleasing to the eye, I believe the huge increase in CGI is the issue. CGI artists are fantastic, but when they don't have enough staff and budget, with so many frames to do, with little to know lighting reference points. It just can't be done well and in you end up with stuff like this. I presume directors and camera operaters are given less time to do interesting shots or even think of them, when the production is now extended into post production so much. That they are hoping something will come up.

[@Jokoko2828]

Why develop an interesting style when you can just order the CGI dudes to magic something up in your sweatshop, and it is a sweatshop, the CGI folks aren't given time to make anything cool with the tech they're working with.

[@TheRaven_200]

The supernatural figure they went with was Kronus? The father of Zeus? Is that supposed to be Kronus from Greek Mythology? Or did they just think ot sounded cool?

[@killergrooves2438]

Ah ha! The Crow: City of Angels actually WAS released in theaters and was the #1 movie at the box office for Labor Day weekend! And apparently broke the record for Labor Day Weekend, which is news to me. But that movie had a bit of hype before it was released. I think I was in 5th or 6th grade. I remember the hype for it even though I don’t think I knew that the first movie existed at that point. But that’s why the video game even existed. It was part of the hype machine. But since the movie was bad, all hype evaporated immediately after release. Back in the mid-90s movies did not die as fast as Crow 2 did. Even if they were bombs, they languished in theaters for a while because the VHS release was still like 8 months out.

[@PlushGarage]

What a coincidence, I just started rewatching some of your old stuff yesterday!

[@DarkMegaPlague]

They just couldnt leave The Crow alone from this moneymilking desperation

[@Thefallenminecraftworld27075]

The Crow seems like Death Note 2017. A style over substance unfaithful adaptation that think its deep.

[@gokuxsephiroth4505]

It genuinely feels insulting that a story originally written by an author to cope with the tragic, sudden and most importantly unprovoked passing of his fiancee, (with an anti-drug message to boot) has a remake where the main characters are strung out and get ended specifically because they f*cked around with a gang. Just kind of feels like not making Eric and Shelley normal people to whom this sudden, tragic and unprovoked thing happens kind of misses the point as to why the comic was written in the first place.