The Day Today Episode 1: Main News Attack

The Day Today is a surreal British parody of television current affairs programmes, broadcast in 1994, and created by the comedians Armando Iannucci and Chris Morris. It is an adaptation of the radio programme On the Hour, which was broadcast on BBC Radio 4 between 1991 and 1992.
"Main News Attack" features reports on Prince Charles volunteering to go to prison, the London Jam Festival, bullying in the Church of England, medieval alternative medicine, and a sheepdog piloting an out of control helicopter. Also features Barbara Wintergreen's report on the Elvis-styled execution of American serial killer Chapman Baxter, and Alan Partridge covering the Tour de France and Boxing. [Wikipedia]
Very close to DVD quality.

[@champ10ns08]

I'll never, ever, forget this show even if my brains are erased by mind rubbers.

[@GiveMeBass93]

Too much yellow cake.

[@jh7589]

​@@GiveMeBass93 you mean, Ponce on the Heath? As the youths call it. Or is it Cool Thwaxen Charlie

[@ethzero]

The weird thing is, he's never actually watched the show.

[@christschinwon]

​@@jh7589I've got a mate who never came out of a Cake hole. What a fucking disgrace

[@danmcdaid]

Can you sum it up in a word?

[@DannyScottyEnty]

"This woman is a witch, and is being talked through the drowning procedure" is one of the funniest lines I've ever heard.

[@Lucifronz]

Never registered for me before, but the whole process is basically "if you float back up, you're a witch and we'll weigh you down to drown you" so there's no way to win. Also, people naturally float quite well, but I don't need to poke more holes in the art of witch-testing.

[@cjsimpson]

Chris Morris is a total genius. No one does comedy quite like him

[@public.public]

except all those who wrote it with him...

[@comanchio1976]

+Public Public Fair point. Others involved tend not to get the credit that Morris does for things like this - but there is something peculiarly brilliant about him, particularly - that especially comes across when he improvises in interviews with 'celebrities' and the ludicrous vox pops stuff he did.

[@mermaidman1985]

The genius is that I watched this a young lad and enjoyed it on the level of it being a silly news programme and you grow up and enjoy it on another level.

[@what-uc]

@@mermaidman1985 I enjoyed it on the mezzanine level

[@TheSagaContinuesWu]

@@public.public same goes for everything

[@GitsumSaus]

"Tara, ya shitter". I've used this so many times myself and I don't plan on stopping

[@simonsimon325]

being from the north west i say tara to people all the time, and add ya shitter in the privacy of my own head. fun times.

[@NickyNustar]

"He died on the toilet full of drugs and cheese burgers... And that's the way I'm going to go." Hahahaha.

[@avastyer]

"You could raise more money by auctioning dogs!" One of the funniest lines ever written.

[@sillygoose635]

Not really.

[@jbizzle4922]

@@sillygoose635 shut up

[@agdgdgwngo]

It's the delivery of such a weird line as if it was the obvious thing.

[@colinstewart1432]

The savage joy he feels at upsetting the woman is comedy gold. Long live Chris Morris.

[@davidmolteno6982]

I hate Sebastian Coe! 😂 so random

[@Vandalle.]

"By sheer brilliance, the shepherd dog team also managed to avoid an old woman up a stick in a nearby field" One of the best things I've ever heard.

[@semisemicoloncolon]

I was so confused I had to rewind several times LMAOO

[@jam99]

And the visual... just brilliant!

[@BLINDTUBEMARES]

Don't laugh. We often get old people up sticks round where I come from

[@colinstewart1432]

​@@BLINDTUBEMARESClearly they failed to invest in a Pocket Shepherd.

[@BLINDTUBEMARES]

Well,@@colinstewart1432 we could all do with a pocket shepherd. That little child has saved a lot of lives

[@kaligasm4229]

When Jeremy Paxman recently left Newsnight there was some debate over who should replace him. Chris Morris was the obvious choice if even for just one edition.

[@comanchio1976]

Bringing that fundraising woman to tears mid-episode was particularly Paxman-esque

[@SKa-tt9nm]

comanchio1976 “has this been traumatic for you?”

[@retrorambles517]

Such a missed opportunity The whole episode could be a one off day today episode

[@Macho_Fantastico]

The jam interview is pure comedy gold.

[@awzthemusicalreviews]

Do you anything else you'd wish to say in your defense? Fucking lost it lol

[@jemimallah2591]

@E Quinn it actually does make me sad though. poor lady and her woefully underfunded jam festival getting paxmanned

[@XBLGR]

@@awzthemusicalreviews the fact she says "no" so meekly kills me, she's not crying because he called her ugly, its because she realised he's right 🤣

[@mrbenoit5018]

@@joltee9317 i didn’t know that

[@BossySwan]

It was such a sorry sight seeing him goading her on in such a fashion

[@klaxoncow]

28:36 I love the fact that it just randomly says "Bootsie Collins" in the credits, for no particular reason.

[@benw3029]

There’s George Clinton at 19:08 too lmao

[@ZuluRomeo]

​@@benw3029"Condublasney Piper" 😅

[@medievalist]

The Jam interview is how I generally feel about celebrities raising money.

[@EpicFishFingers]

I love the ridiculous title sequences

[@Mathew1905]

In the DVD commentary they wanted to represent all aspects of the news. Weather, environmental, science, finance, war...

[@ZuluRomeo]

+Mathew1905 and snooker LOL

[@Mathew1905]

You can't forget snooker!!

[@Trundlecake]

Yeah they are classic, the idents in this and brass eye

[@PhilT81]

It was very expensive at the time - it’s so over-the-top it’s great. I love Armando, Steve, Chris and co... Rebecca has been in a lot of great shows, for example.

[@xandercorsaj5691]

Ah, such genuinely impeccable satire. I've seen this and Brasseye a hundred times and it still doesn't get old. I've always been certain that, were this (or Brasseye) to come on the telly at teatime, mu grandparents would totally think it was the news. God, I'd love to hear their reactions to it: "Did you hear, son? That sheepdog that managed to land a helicopter? Clever,clever breed the collie..." I can hear my Papa sayin it :-D

[@1WEareBUFO1]

"did you hear about the *whore dogs* ? i thought we'd done away with them"

[@neanda]

that's a very cool comment on a post, it's why I read the top comments on KZbin but not on Facebook. I hope your grandies are ok, and you too

[@BLINDTUBEMARES]

So true- and on a similar note- my mum and dad used to watch films on TV and endlessly say, 'is that the same one as that other one? Why do they make all these women look the same?'

[@devidwobinson8747]

😂😂

[@ThommyofThenn]

@@neanda right. Cheers

[@adrianmoore525]

20 years on this still holds up so well.

[@BritishCommentWriter]

Not only does it hold up, it's actually getting better and more relevant as time goes on. Back in 1994, that bit on amateur video footage replacing the news would've seemed an over-the-top reaction to niche shows like "Cops" and "Police, Camera, Action". Now, it's not only sticking it to youtube reporting, but it's sticking it to our tendency to film everything rather than help people, viral news stories and people's increasing gullibility when it comes to viral news stories. (See everything from Kony2012 to "China's Entire Internet Suddenly Rerouted to a Single House in Wyoming" or "Ghost Ship Full of Cannibal Rats Heading to England"). www.cracked.com/quick-fixes/6-more-news-stories-that-were-just-big-dumb-lies/#ixzz3GQoSevEB

[@Robert.Deeeee]

Adrian, I was about to say the exact same thing!

[@lolafinch]

I have suspicision that he won't re-emerge until this show stops increasing in relevance.

[@comanchio1976]

+BL Like some mad Excalibur of British satire, you mean - only being lobbed at Albion by the lady-of-the-lake of UK counter-culture, when the country most needs it? Yeah; you might be onto something, there!

[@SwazerSwazers]

now 25 years on :)

[@FrankNFurter1000]

'An old woman up a stick in a nearby field.' - I fucking hurt.

[@leeeroy57]

200 vicars, all going 'Mmmmmmmmmmmmm'.

[@crybunny]

and he didn't know who was doing it but we were all going Mmmmmmmmmmmmm

[@NatureScot]

@@crybunny I know it's not big or clever, but we used to do this in our art classes, 20 years before this was made (not proud, but it was bloody hilarious at the time).

[@felixcornelius2577]

timeless classic sureal comedy, nothing today can touch it

[@chopun3862]

She's less satire tho and more just funny surreal ridiculousness

[@sillygoose635]

yes it can be touched

[@ENigma-um8zw]

That’s because in 2020. Surreality is the current reality. Tho to be fair the green/blue screen graphical work is still pretty untouched un that respect. See ya in 2026! :)

[@MyUncleToby]

Wrong! GB News (on Sky 515) is even finnier.

[@StonefieldJim4]

It's not 'surreal'. It's often absurdist, in its heightened caricature and satire of news broadcasting, but no, it's not surreal. Mark Gatiss gets similarly pissed off when people call The League of Gentlemen 'surreal'. If you should ever meet Chris Morris, I strongly advise you to give the s word a miss.

[@d-x-v-i]

"Bottomley refreshed after three days on cross" is one of my favourite lines from the whole series and it's literally the first one. Just phenomenal

[@nerdwhitenerd]

"I aint going out on no electric chair, im going out on a electric toilet" Glorious

[@NotSoFinalProductions]

This is almost indistinguishable now from real rolling news.

[@midas4057]

Natsume maybe in America

[@codehorse8843]

(And the UK)

[@adamglasgow9268]

Just as truthful too

[@InvisibleHotdog]

They did everything to make it look authentic, even with the worse quality for American stories because of the formatting differences between video tapes

[@kollusion1]

Definitely the UK

[@TelecastPropellor96]

While the heroes celebrated, the shepherd's unattended flock caused a pileup on the M5 in which 430 people were injured. Mercifully, the ordeal forged such firm bonds between the victims that it led in many cases to marriage.

[@Maffoo]

"A droplet density of about 50,000 per spherical inch"

[@choptop81]

I lost it when they showed "Portillo's wife"

[@whatiswrongwithyou5583]

Subtle details like his satisfied smirk after making that woman cry

[@TB.....]

Literally a visionary. This was the 90's and yet all but 6 items came to pass.

[@silkyfirst3097]

Havent seen the full video but what do you mean

[@silkyfirst3097]

Nevermind lol

[@thunderpussy8956]

Best satire programme ever made in my opinion and Chris Morris well ahead of his time. Absolutely nailed it!

[@mpdalyful1]

Thunder Pussy chris morris and armando iannuchi are two of the british satirists of modern times.

[@BLINDTUBEMARES]

@@mpdalyful1 true- Iannuchi is holding a jam auction next month

[@ryanheppel861]

I love the increasing hostility of the workplace from Chris.

[@JamesBrett2008]

Slept on by the masses, nothing comes anywhere near the day today and brass eye. The amount of quality scripting per episode is ridiculous, so much gold, so much wit, perfect timing and decades ahead of its time. I cant praise it enough.

[@irpwellyn]

Garth Marenghi's Darkplace

[@stevecox7075]

"Has this been very upsetting for you?"

[@SKa-tt9nm]

The most underrated moment of the episode

[@R4ttlehead666]

*and have you anything else to say in your defence*

[@Nightopian1982]

'Some bad, ecclesiastical hurting.' I don't think there's ever been a satire or even any TV show as quotable as this one. My mates and I still drop a line during just about every social occasion. When subjects come up in conversation, or you notice something whilst walking in the street, and someone can't resist quoting The Day Today, you know that it's a timeless classic. Sometimes I just love being British.

[@TheZacDJ]

"Down, Up... bangs his head and in" . Brilliant.

[@xe2594]

The way he goes at Alan each time at the start of his segment hahaha

[@neilbainbridge8719]

I know that so many here comment on the sheer brilliance of the spoken word but the visual comedy is supberb. Chris picking up an Uzi and moving it from one side to another is just one example of his desire to get as many jokes, in any form, in as possible.

[@andyroseby4539]

And the news montage crescendo ending with him doing a downward glissando on an electric organ!!!🎹

[@paddym27]

that market update at 19:41 is just brilliant. i can't stop laughing.

[@Juggler4071]

"And no let up today for British manufacturers; there were large profit slumps for SecuriVag and United Haha, down 6.4 joining Collins Perhaps Units on a lower third rung. There was better news for Edger Wedger Ledge Budge who mustered 2.41 up 88 very slightly. But Oxy McGee flew back a ninth despite a creeping bid from Connected Breath Dump at 4." Total madness delivered with such authentic conviction. Marvellous.

[@A-small-amount-of-peas]

The Jam Festival segment is still one of the best bits of comedy I've ever seen. I remember laughing until the back of my head hurt watching it on my dodgy 90's telly with a shitty aerial that you had to waggle sometimes

[@alfsmith4936]

It was always snowing in those days.

[@nervopus2972]

I hate sebastian coe

[@grav75]

This was and still is the highest quality satire ever 🤣🤣

[@alfsmith4936]

I thought I was watching GB 'news'.

[@mattmacneil3424]

there is another ritual: the ritual..of the bullying ritual.

[@ricklopez2314]

"Bangs his head on the board and in. Lovely!" Pure genius.

[@conorsmith8551]

Textbook

[@matta6593]

The genutainment segment is scarily accurate and holds a light to today's obsession with recording everything on your phone and sharing it to the world

[@InceyWincey]

“After ten minutes, she called for help.” Funny but not quite accurate, nobody actually bothers to call for help.

[@snavs420]

"The steel vulture of Beelzebub was now just seconds away from the children's soft heads. By sheer brilliance, the shepherd dog team also managed to avoid an old woman up a stick in a near by field."

[@TheRepublicOfJohn]

10:28 love the 90s background music of the weather report and the detached and calm voice of the presenter. I wish there was a real weather service radio station I could listen to that sounded like this

[@pablogalbraith]

The business section had me crying for 5 mins

[@cats-uk]

I love how timeless and brilliant this is

[@stingfan4]

Chris Morris needs to bring this show back, now more than ever!

[@Robert-dh1yj]

@@jaybullock6675 yeah

[@squeakyelbows]

@@Robert-dh1yj Or, perhaps now more than ever.

[@Robert-dh1yj]

@@squeakyelbows yeah

[@jonathancooper4914]

It’s still relevant.

[@mnky75]

The relevancy is bigger than big....it's large!

[@davidjatt3251]

"Some speech or other" LOL

[@tubey84]

Absolute timeless brilliance.

[@sinbad8982]

3:14 Coogan's little laugh there never fails to make me howl

[@zigisamblak]

Man I fucking loved this show. I was like 18 when it was on TV, used to get baked before it went on air and then just watched it laughing hysterically from start to finish. So sad it only lasted one season, still spawned Alan Partridge though. =D

[@bensmith1689]

Brass Eye was a worthy successor IMO. I too would have liked more, but I alos like that it didn't stick around long enough to get old.

[@niev1111]

this is me right now

[@mikearchibald744]

And Alan Partridge was about the unfunniest part of it.

[@zigisamblak]

@@mikearchibald744 Really? I love Alan Partridge.

[@mikearchibald744]

@@zigisamblak I think thats a pretty common sentiment since he got a lot of spinoffs, but I really didn't find him funny at all.

[@thenandnow111]

Slamming the wasps from the pure apple of truth Great one liners

[@spartan.falbion2761]

This is one of those programmes you find quite funny as a teenager, then realise how much you missed. This is the most hillarious thing I´ve seen since Darkplace.

[@SunSurfer777]

"What letter is it? The letter of the law?"

[@sillygoose635]

J.

[@therealcaldini]

Red on a blue background.

[@RealityCheck6T9]

"The letter of the law. Any problems?"

[@ramonek9109]

ä

[@jl8217]

J, obviously.

[@jonoil7816]

"I hate Sebastian Coe."

[@comanchio1976]

We all do, Chris. We all do...

[@vinnievegas3765]

“Peter Elliot, no relation to the late Denholm” Greatest line in the history of mankind

[@monro2159]

This was groundbreaking and satire at its finest. Amazingly it's even more relevant today than it was at the time!

[@jonathancooper4914]

The funniest thing is how deadpan and seriously they play it. The more seriously they play it, the funnier it is.

[@Macho_Fantastico]

It's depressing we'll never get anything this good again. Brass Eye was amazing to.

[@sillygoose635]

Yeah no.

[@GeoffreyBronson]

so pessimistic, blood hell

[@alfsmith4936]

GB news is a 24hr version of this show.

[@Broadercasting]

I love Barbara Wintergreen's uppy-downy pun and allit-fest, typical of American affiliate TV stations framed in low-def NTSC lookalike blur. All it needed was some 60Hz hum

[@BossySwan]

That weather forecast cracks me up every time

[@InceyWincey]

A U.S. Marine singing the titles of Elvis songs to the tune of the Star Spangled Banner while a man is force fed cheeseburgers and pumped with drugs until he dies and the whole thing is broadcast on live TV. What perfect imagery.

[@cockshield]

"Fancy Lady Fancy Lady?! Well fancy that!" Fucking lol!

[@jamesbennett3253]

Red Pill Intelligence i

[@JohnLutherable]

the Attitudes Night is just pure gold. I'd put it among the best Python sketches, every segment is perfect. "Wassewantnow ey?"

[@westyorkshirebiker8270]

Ironic how modern rolling news has morphed into this. So so funny. Just brilliant. The graphics and serious music just make it. 'Hello you' lol

[@peteruren2050]

I could listen to him say "I hate Sebastien Coe" for hours on end.

[@cockshield]

Patrick Marber (Peter O'Hanrahahanrahan/Chapman Baxter) looks just like Tom Hardy's Ronnie Kray.

[@cockshield]

***** Tom Hardy in Legend as Ronnie Kray.

[@james5995]

+cockshield I can see the resemblance aswell.

[@james5995]

+Lord Hightar Google image search Peter O'Hanraha-Hanrahan and you'll see an actual picture of Tom Hardy. I think it's his eyes, remind me of Tom's.

[@comanchio1976]

+Cockshield haha oh yeah, I hadn't noticed that before

[@TelecastPropellor96]

I can't see it personally. Tom's face is more narrow and juts out at the tip.

[@99Boiko]

Amazing how the regular cast somehow dressed up and got into character so quickly as to all be convincing, let's face it, if we didn't know it was fiction and only saw ONE clip, we'd all be persuaded!

[@TheDEATHSTARIII]

im surprised Channel 4 let Kiddy stare come back for a second season

[@anonb4632]

Dragon lair And when they axed it, Channel 5 attempted to revive it.

[@plasmatorproducer]

Watch Adam & Joe's Fourmative years and you'll understand

[@readventurekids]

"His Mother's Pleasure" - Genius

[@NGRevenant]

That 999 pisstake lol, grew up being terrifed by that show

[@NxDoyle]

It could have been made yesterday. So good.

[@comanchio1976]

+Nx Doyle It was so brilliant, that it's it's still miles ahead of it's time, today

[@edrooney9580]

yeah couldn't have been made yesterday...nothing made yesterday or anything made after around 2002/3 comes anywhere near as quality as this

[@NxDoyle]

@@edrooney9580 Bollocks. Such a trite, facile view. 'They don't make 'em like they used to.' A mix of blinkered nostalgia and some fatuous notion that people have neither the talent nor the permission to be creative.

[@lolafinch]

No, it couldn't have been made yesterday.

[@alecmiddleton1842]

​@@lolafinch but it could have been made the day before the day before the day today. Fact.

[@douglasmilton2805]

I remember seeing an interview with Paxman where he tried to make out that he'd never seen On The Hour and, indeed, had never heard of it. My respect for the Paxter took quite a plummet from that moment on.

[@nakedmambo]

Ta-ra ye shitter.

[@blertstain]

That 888 in the top right of the screen for the Attitudes Night brings back memories.

[@derekk.2263]

As an american, the second bit about the elvis execution is SPOT ON

[@davepratt9132]

"Steel vulture of Beelzebub"

[@congydave]

I saw Chris Morris today on a bicycle, in high vis, going past The Oval cricket ground

[@congydave]

@@NatureScot I imagine he's a pretty serious guy in day to day life. Even his comedy has an intensity about it (which makes it work). I saw Mark Heap walking through Neal's Yard a few years back too. He's taller in real life. Wanted to say hello, but I didn't know his name off the top of my head at the time so just kind of nodded and smiled

[@theculturedthug6609]

Why did America shows on the TV back in the 90s always look strange just like the Elvis execution sketch😂???

[@arwelp]

It was the NTSC colour standard (National Television Standards Committee, or Never Twice the Same Colour) that didn’t convert well to the UK’s PAL standard, and there had to be conversion between the US’s 30 frames per second, and the UK’s 25 frames per second.

[@TheIncrediblyAverage]

What a brilliant show. Glad I stumbled upon it

[@westyorkshirebiker8270]

I heard an American news reader only last week and I could swear it was Barbara Wintergreen 😃

[@jimmy_junk]

15:47 that is an absolutely breathtaking sky. I could look into forever.

[@vollsticks]

I love how the guy was called Chapman Baxter in every episode he appeared in. Watched this at school; made me a Morris addict for life...some of (if not THE) best comedy the UK has produced (along with Brass Eye and Blue Jam, of course).

[@mpdalyful1]

vollsticks brass eye was exceptional.

[@vollsticks]

It most certainly was. Credit to Armando Ianucci; though!

[@TitanFind]

And the murder count increases each time.

[@Pleistoneax]

Brilliant. The naked disdain Chris shows for his co-editors and guest commentators is hilarious, and you just know that that's the kind of off-camera chemistry between editors at a televised news desk

[@HeskethBang]

This is the show ‘The Mash Report’ wished it could be...

[@ryiin]

Spot on.

[@icecreamforcrowhurst]

“... civil engineers in Alaska have found a gap between the horizon and the earth...” 🤣

[@Oppurtunafish]

I've seen this a dozen times over the years and it doesn't stop being hilarious

[@tomahzo]

I love the intro sequence, so amazingly overdone. It's like it never ends ;D.

[@JimbobFaz]

At 20:27 Chris just happens to be putting a sub machine gun down on his desk as they hand over to him! That is so random and hellious! 🤣

[@magna4100]

Love the way that get the voices so perfect. Just like the controlled news/propaganda outlets.

[@zryxen]

Impressive following here; will have to upload the rest soon. Watch this space!

[@mihkelvilismae7498]

i will! :D

[@DaNeedle]

do it!!!

[@travisbackpacker]

pull yer finger out. we want 4K

[@chriswinter5765]

Yes we want 4K versions of something filmed in SD just so that we can use up more bandwidth to download something of the exact same quality as what we are watching now. :P

[@zryxen]

Aye sorry neglected my account. To be fair I think another uploader had this covered anyway? I'll get on it. Morris is life.

[@markfarron7018]

Absolute genius. Love it.

[@chrisman4568]

That 999 Disater bit...Morris goes in on that one. The way he says 'faulty design'.

[@aljoa2392]

Daily show wouldn’t exist without this amazing show

[@ryiin]

I loved this show so much.

[@YourMother88]

Fantastic quality upload, thank you!

[@Loveeworms]

even the “hello you” i cant cope😭😭😭😭

[@stevenedwards1298]

love the action packed opening titles, then the sports bit is a snooker player lining up a shot!

[@fingerhorn4]

Still the finest satire about the media. Nothing touches it.

[@StephyM.C.]

The 'speak your brains' segments are always my favorite

[@ZoomStranger]

Fantastic - thanks for putting this up

[@TheDEATHSTARIII]

alan partridges career began here

[@ShearsOfAtropos]

it didn't, his career began on hospital radio. this was one of the peaks of his career

[@costlyblood1927]

actually, Alan Partridge's first appearance was in On The Hour in 1991 and he had his own show, Knowing me, Knowing You, within a year.

[@Slippy82]

Coming back in 2020 still totally hilarious!