"The (Easy-to-Miss) Signs of Inattentive ADHD" Live Q&A Session for Women with ADHD

ADHD expert Saline explains the easy-to-miss signs of inattentive ADHD, which is commonly misdiagnosed in girls and women, especially. Learn more about ADDitude: www.additudemag.com
Learn more about Dr. Sharon Saline:
drsharonsaline.com/
This was originally broadcast on 1/7/22.

[@stephaniegiltinan2000]

I think I just had the sudden realization that I need to get tested. I was listening to this whole thing while cleaning my bathroom and room. If I try to do any chores without music or a podcast I get bored or easily frustrated.

[@xannaz9226]

I've had meltdowns when my headphones aren't charged. I have them on, usually with organizing or adhd audio to start my day, do the dishes, make coffee, all the boring chores, and it wasn't until I began researching ADHD that I realized this was stim for inattentive adhd.

[@ettjuridisktombudfordenens357]

Same here

[@bobdenson5285]

Doctors will still help you without taking a test. Idk, testing for autism is booked out a year for some providers. I imagine ADD ADHD folks are looking at wait times maybe less, maybe it's only 6 months. Personally I wouldn't take that test if it's booked out far. Talk to your Dr first you know? That's a good policy anyway.

[@jjohnston5406]

The part about needing something to do with my hands in order to listen is so true for me. Without it, my mind refuses to stay tuned in. Also the part about needing to put everything in the same place every time. I KNOW that if my work bag is not packed in advance with everything in the right place, I will NOT arrive at work with the things I need. If I carelessly throw something in the wrong place thinking this time I will remember, I will not only waste endless time looking for it, but I will wonder around trying to remember what I was even going to do in the first place.

[@valerielander2310]

I find that I can focus intently for hours on tasks I enjoy such as drawing or crocheting. I lose track of time because I'm so focused on what I'm doing. However, I can't get through "boring" tasks such as paperwork or housework. I get distracted and overwhelmed with these tasks. I get so frustrated with myself. I'm trying to form better habits and organizational skills but it feels like an uphill battle.

[@nicolabradley9130]

I had to double check that it wasn’t me that wrote this comment because it seems that we’re very similar. I can crochet for days with intense focus, but housework and paperwork become overwhelming VERY quickly.

[@valerielander2310]

@@nicolabradley9130 🙂 It's nice to talk with people who understand!

[@jbanana1776]

My ADHD becomes increasingly debilitating as I age. My sensory issues also become more intense. .

[@neromillie]

I'm 47 and in the process of getting assessed. I was wondering if anyone else felt this way. As I get older, it becomes increasingly exhausting to manage life, and I'm constantly in sensory overload.

[@borleyboo5613]

Me as well. I’m 67 and I have yet to be diagnosed. I know without a doubt I have ADHD but here in England, the waiting list to be diagnosed is up to four years. And to go private, it costs up to £1000 +.

[@kinseyschuman9655]

For women, As estrogen decreases, symptoms will increase

[@anneross5362]

Another thing I’m curious about is adult onset ADHD. I’ve heard mental health professionals say that ADHD always manifests in childhood to varying degrees. But in my own experience this isn’t true. i was diagnosed with inattentive ADHD at age 62. I do not remember or recognize any ADHD symptoms in myself as a child. There are no teachers comments that indicate any consistent issues like hyperactivity, etc. I did well in school except for math. So I would like to hear more about this topic.

[@ezb6798]

I don’t have ADD but several people in my life do, so I like to be informed about it. I have a comment about the “use a buddy” idea. I have had many people, including mere acquaintances, try to use me in this way without talking about it first. I’ll be in a meeting, listening carefully to a speaker, and the person next to me suddenly whispers “What did he say?” I find this very difficult to handle. It pulls my attention away from what’s happening in the meeting, and while I’m trying to respond to the question, I miss the next thing that happens. I can’t listen to one speaker and talk to someone else at the same time the way some people seem to be able to do. I also find it unpleasantly startling to have my attention suddenly diverted. So my comment is, if you want to have a buddy system, you should talk to your proposed buddy about it ahead of time and agree on how you are going to handle it. If I were asked, I would agree to share my notes and my memory about what happened in the meeting, but only after the meeting is over. Asking me during the meeting isn’t going to help either one of us.

[@91splamy]

I never really thought about that. I’m one of those people that will ask and it didn’t occur to me how much I could be bothering the other person.

[@LukeSumIpsePatremTe]

Thank you for your comment. And please, if something bothers you, let us know

[@krism6260]

Thats awesome that you're willing to do that! Do you takes notes during lectures? Thinking from an ADD point of view, we drift in and out focus. After the meeting, we have no idea which parts we missed... would it also be doable for you to shift your notes toward us during the meeting? It gives us a hook to pull our focus up on...

[@Reeeeeee3333]

@@91splamy when I was I. Primary school a lot of people would aggressively turn to me and say "well you should have been listening" I understand it can be annoying but some people are just mean Maybe it’s because I know what’s it like but if anyone didn’t know what was going on I’d try to help them

[@hypno9628]

I got the diagnosis last year, and I feel like the Inattentive type isn't talked about very much compared to the hyperactive and impulsive type. It annoys me a bit, as I see them as two seperate things kinda, even though they are both ADHD, there's a lot of distinct differences both in the persons brain and of course how it shows "visually". I do daydream a lot, and it is something I always have but not something I have thought about a lot until recently, and it is kind of an issue for me as my daydreams are not always pleasant and they "feel real" even though I know they arent. It is nice to see it pointed out in this video :) My point was how much research is there on the inattentive type as I feel like there is a lot less compared to the hyperactive/impulsive type.

[@xannaz9226]

Yeah, I have a hard time seeing the hyperactive and inattentive being part of the same actual thing as well. I dismissed ADHD for myself because of the standard hyperactive boy model. I'm not that at all, but inattentive af.

[@picturethefeeling8526]

I have seen amazing change…. . Am 47. what helped? Running, subliminal videos for intrusive thoughts, drawing. I considered that all thoughts that are interrupting my initial goal are intrusive and therefore I will not consider them as valid. It’s a skill to do that and it can be learned.

[@cardisea]

What do you draw ?

[@maryblue75]

@@cardisea I just took a look you can see it in the channel video uploads kzbin.info/www/bejne/hGG1gHeYf8Sfb9E kzbin.info/www/bejne/mIe9qJerqJV7gLs

[@amberskyboutique]

Thank you this was helpful 😌

[@fascistscansuckit]

What about a kid who refuses to do something at school because they think it is stupid? One of my report cards said that I "stubbornly refused" to complete these basic readers. That's because 1. I already knew how to read far advanced stuff than that. and 2. The stories weren't even engaging. So it took me a minute to realize that it was better not to draw attention to myself, and to always keep a book of my choice on my lap, to defeat the boredom. And also to help regulate sensory overwhelm. Especially auditory visual stuff. But that meant that I often did not know what was going on, and sometimes would get called out by the teacher, see everyone leaving the classroom and have to hurry to keep up and always asking other kids what was going on. I'm 56 and I remember it if I am prompted.

[@C.I366]

This is very reassuring video

[@ds8290]

Thank you so much for this video. It has helped me understand what my daughter goes through everyday. I am glad we went through therapy to figure this out because it started effecting her schoolwork and comprehension and she was in a place where she felt, no matter what she did, it wasn't good enough. I am so happy we are able to work through this together.

[@bethb5915]

This was super helpful, thank you Dr Saline! 🙏🏼 😊

[@wendyhannan2454]

She’s amazing, it’s great advice. I found this very helpful.

[@alondramceldowney8640]

Highly recommend The Minimal Mom on KZbin and one of her playlists on the basics or getting started with minimalism. She introduces tons of principles and concepts both of item reduction and organization. I could easily listen to all of her ideas and cherry pick the ones that suits me. Her friend KZbinr ClutterBug also explains organization appeal based on personality. You may believe you hate organizing because you’re organizing with someone else’s brain’s style. 😂 I get overwhelmed at the drop of the hat, and I’ve never been diagnosed but all my friends and family believe my Google diagnosis. Lol! Minimalism has been a LIFE SAVER for me pursuing life as a working mom. I think I sincerely may have suffered a mental breakdown if I had not exercised that skill of getting rid of items. God bless, everybody!!!

[@imetal16ddin1]

I phone has a calendar app that is really easy to use. Now I just have to remember to check it.

[@wendyhannan2454]

Me too, it can be so frustrating, but we can’t beat our self up over it. 🤷‍♀️

[@cityseabird]

I found this difficult to watch due to the speaker tripping over her words a lot. I'm already feeling irritable and agitated from my husband clearing his throat constantly and clanging his fork on his plate in the next room, and every time she did it I screamed on my head "get on with it!!" Totally unreasonable. This is one of the reasons that I know that I have ADHD.

[@paytontimmons2009]

Ok can someone help me? For my whole life, I’ve gotten straight A’s in school. But in class, I can never focus on anything at all. Even at home every single day, no matter the task, I get distracted and/or totally forget what I’m doing. It’s literally getting out of control. The thing is, my parents don’t think I have adhd because my moms a therapist and she said it’s unlikely because “I get such good grades”, but I’m struggling so much with the basic thing in life and don’t know what to do anymore. Im also terrified of ppl think I’m self diagnosing which I’m really trying not to do. Please help.

[@jjohnston5406]

It is likely that you are highly intelligent and are able to pass the classes without paying attention. I didn't get diagnosed until I was 34.

[@jennyboyce]

If you are struggling, you should see a doctor. Even if your Mom may disagree, it’s still important to get help if you’re feeling this way. Be honest and tell her you’re having a hard time and that you’d like to rule it out or have a second opinion.

[@laurettajohnnie2211]

You have to listen to yourself and trust your instincts and feelings - you don't need permission to look into this - I have lived my whole life knowing something was wrong and I could have done something much sooner. Your exam results are 'masking' your condition or enabling others to mask it so look beyond your results (well done by the way) and do what is right for you.

[@swissshepherdess2062]

Thumb up if you needed to increase the speed of this video in order to focus and listen till the end ? :) i took some notes: 1. one of the symptoms is difficulties completing tasks (divide your task to smaller pieces) 2. adhd goes together with working memory issues (not to be mistaken with short term memory issues) 3. slow processing speed, because the mind is scattered (medication can help, focus on 1 thing at a time, slow down) 4. behavioral intervention help, cognitive therapy can help, not only medication 5. day dreaming is one of the symptoms 6. give yourself extra time to complete work 7. have a backup plan so you do not miss information at school or at work 8. use tools: phone, alarms, calendars, notifications, post-it notes, instruction lists and check lists, to do lists 9. quite your mind down before bedtime, write your worries on paper, do some reading, relax you body 10. rejection sensitivity dysphoria is one of the symptoms 11. trouble listening or following directions is another sign 12. find something that energizes you to get started with a task, to motivate you (like listening to music ..?) 13. disorganization is another sign (make home for important things like keys, phone..; create organization systems that work best for you) 14. reward yourself for completing the tasks

[@amattes1960]

What I find strange is how there are many videos on this channel that have very interesting titles and I would like to watch them, but most of them are over an hour long! Can you see the irony here?

[@borleyboo5613]

Watch for five minutes, then have a break then back to video. That’s what I do. I can’t sustain concentration for hour long videos either.

[@sarahdeverell7302]

Thank you for the knitting idea - I have always wanted to take my knitting to church to help me focus !

[@neromillie]

Oh my gosh, I struggle so much in church too!

[@borleyboo5613]

Breaking down tasks is even harder for ADHD sufferers. It just makes it seem harder and longer with all these so-called ‘doable’ fragments. It becomes even more overwhelming. Better to set a timer for, say, twenty minutes, then have a break and so on until the dreaded task is done.

[@kuehnel16]

Does adhd make it very difficult to make and keep friends. I'm 60 and have never had a true friend. I never seemed to like myself unless someone else liked me. It always seemed like as soon as i let my guard down people stabbed me in the back

[@laurajones8477]

My sister lost several jobs because innatentive AdHD?

[@ThePathOfLeastResistanc]

Same with me now I’m on disability

[@laurajones8477]

@@ThePathOfLeastResistancgood for you, my sister made a lot mistakes at her jobs, she is not detail oriented, lots of paperwork jobs.

[@erap1057]

@@laurajones8477 I personally struggled so much with paperwork in jobs. I have a diagnosis for ADHD. But only recently and now know better than to do those jobs again.

[@midlife_crossroads]

@@ThePathOfLeastResistanc Was it difficult to get disability for it? Did it take a long time?

[@krystleroy3068]

I have left so many jobs

[@vcanadian1971]

Doom box- Didn’t organize only moved

[@anneross5362]

I’ve been diagnosed with this type of ADHD. What I find interesting about this is that I have no difficulty focusing on and finishing tasks that I love and am passionate about.I’ve also learned that I don’t always identify boredom correctly. I think of it in terms of being interested vs not being interested rather than being bored.

[@johannabernardy8945]

What type of medications help with intention Add

[@RavenVapor873]

The same meds for hyperactivity ADHD.

[@brogramy]

What kind of Medication? Ritalin, Amphetamine, Strattera

[@lfsilva]

This is too long I need this in smaller increments

[@mybabyloveshummus]

This is so hard to watch because after every long sentence a click tongue noise occurred.