The Exposure Hierarchy: How to do Exposure Therapy for Anxiety: Anxiety Skills #20

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An exposure hierarchy is just a fancy way of saying "the skill of breaking your fears down into tiny steps and facing them in your growth zone instead of panicking or avoiding."
You can overcome your fears, phobias, anxiety, and OCD using an exposure hierarchy. An exposure hierarchy is a tool developed by psychologists to help you develop the skills needed to beat anxiety through tiny little steps.
When you face fears in the right way, without jumping in too fast or avoiding them, your brain basically rewires itself to believe that you are safe, reducing anxiety and increasing your ability to face your fears without that fight/flight/freeze response.
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Therapy in a Nutshell, LLC, and the information provided by Emma McAdam are solely intended for informational and entertainment purposes and are not a substitute for advice, diagnosis, or treatment regarding medical or mental health conditions. Although Emma McAdam is a licensed marriage and family therapist, the views expressed on this site or any related content should not be taken for medical or psychiatric advice. Always consult your physician before making any decisions related to your physical or mental health.
About Me:
I’m Emma McAdam. I’m a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, and I have worked in various settings of change and growth since 2004. My experience includes juvenile corrections, adventure therapy programs, wilderness therapy programs, an eating disorder treatment center, a residential treatment center, and I currently work in an outpatient therapy clinic.
In therapy I use a combination of Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, Systems Theory, positive psychology, and a bio-psycho-social approach to treating mental illness and other challenges we all face in life. The ideas from my videos are frequently adapted from multiple sources. Many of them come from Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, especially the work of Steven Hayes, Jason Luoma, and Russ Harris. The sections on stress and the mind-body connection derive from the work of Stephen Porges (the Polyvagal theory), Peter Levine (Somatic Experiencing) Francine Shapiro (EMDR), and Bessel Van Der Kolk. I also rely heavily on the work of the Arbinger institute for my overall understanding of our ability to choose our life's direction.
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[@exposuretherapytoolkit1479]

I like your description of exposure therapy! Thank you for helping educate folks about the value of exposure in treating anxiety.

[@TherapyinaNutshell]

awesome, glad you like it!

[@caucasianafrican1435]

Really? That's awesome. "You did a hard thing"!.

[@cforte0423]

How do you do this if your anxiety is about having the anxiety. How it makes you feel, if you will get better etc?

[@phyllisboyle1162]

@@cforte0423 yes exactly!! Just thinking about it makes me freak out

[@cforte0423]

@@phyllisboyle1162 I am on Cipralex and I feel better than ever. It has given me a chance to challenge the anxiety without the terrible affects

[@saratogawinner934]

As my brother always told me, the opposite of anxiety isn't not having anxiety, it's "doing". Eventually by doing (with anxiety), will extinguish the fear. The amygdala learns to unpair the unnecessary response. In fact, you sort of need to have fear in order for it to work. That means you've activated the right part of the brain! It's not comfortable! But neither is upping weights at the gym! Yet this is how you grow stronger and eventually it's not even a challenge. If you lift weights without a bit of strain, muscle soreness etc, chances are you won't grow strong. Brain is no different... Speaking of the gym, I have found exercise, like good heavy exercise a few times a week, tremendously lowers anxiety.

[@ganbatte1260]

Exercises helps anxiety. I feel energous after dking excercises

[@ricoparadiso]

Ohhh i like that, the needing of fear to confirm you have activated the right part of the brain. Iv come to these videos because iv been practicing this by going to small cafes etc. for social anxiety and today even though I did well I felt so defeated that I couldnt just be at peace in there, tired of not being able to act as myself. Sometimes I get discouraged when I dont see the progress.

[@adamjensen5832]

You won't get better until you stop trying

[@davidleo5766]

have been a victim of Anxiety disorder for the past years and all through college, thanks to #DoctorEromon on KZbin… .. I'm getting hold of my self now,

[@Rnue]

I dunno I'm so old. It seems too late.

[@aly6876]

ive been dealing with extreme anxiety for about ten months ago but today I went to the grocery store and felt normal. I'm very proud of myself.

[@kevindillashaw9950]

Amazing...hope you're still progressing/overcoming it ❤🎉😊

[@Bayoubebe]

I’ve watched 100’s of anxiety videos in my life, and idk why, but this video is pretty calming and encouraging to me. You have s nice gift and this was helpful. THANks!!!

[@poojasrivastava5471]

So true

[@blondebomber-qo2uy]

Did you know she sells full courses? I might be the only one who didn't notice it in her description but I found out about it today. I love her too 🤗

[@nonnogirl123456789]

i think it’s bc of her voice

[@Bri-wc4ib]

When anxiety pops up, I've started saying "I want anxiety because I want to live my life!!" And then I start singing "I Want it All" from High School Musical 3 but change the words to I want all the anxiety 😂 It really does help me stop being afraid of my anxiety!!

[@HTNPSullivan]

I did this to get over fear of elevators after avoiding them for 20 years, which created lots of problems in my life. I learned that phobias are at their root an INABILITY TO TOLERATE anxious feelings, or a LOW TOLERANCE for feelings like dread and fear. So, little by little, I let myself feel these things... like I stepped into the elevator, touched the back wall and jumped out before the doors closed, and worked my way up to letting the doors closed but hitting the button to open them immediately, then going up one floor (with no one else on the elevator!), etc. I can now do a maximum of 6 floors with no more than 2 other people. I am still anxious, especially if the doors don't open quickly, but my body doesn't go into "I'm going to die!" mode. I was forced to deal with my phobia when I took a job as a companion/homemaker/PCA and part of my job was to accompany clients to medical appointments. Almost always, my clients needed to use an elevator. Now, like others here, I am trying to figure out how to do this with planes. I have claustrophobia in general, pretty severe, so planes are especially tough. I have also avoided them for more than 25 years. But I want to travel! (once we're past the pandemic). Am learning relaxation techniques, hoping to at least control my physical responses. Thanks for this video and the book reference. Very helpful.

[@arrarrrrarar8121]

That's great!

[@Jo-zx9fz]

Omg same here 😢😢 I freak out in plane, start crying.

[@HTNPSullivan]

@@Jo-zx9fz unfortunately we can't practice walking into and back out of a plane, so I am expecting to have to use a few techniques to unteach my mind and body in terms of how they react to being with so many people in a place that's thousands of feet in the sky and over which I have zero control and there's no way to get out until we land again. Somehow I need to shift focus while relaxing my breathing . Again, the key seems to be not trying to force oneself to NOT be anxious but to keep the anxiety at a manageable level. I think it takes regular practice, a real commitment, and not trying to do it the day you get on the plane. That's my plan, anyway. I'm looking into tapping, which is supposed to break the circuit when one starts to freak out. And breathing exercises. And being very careful about the stories I tell myself about what's happening. Maybe, for example, telling myself I'm feeling excited and can't wait to see my friend (friends for 60 years at this point. Maybe I will look at photos of her and her home in Oregon and think about the places she wants to show me. I like to draw, so I could do that to distract myself. If I'm lucky, the person next to me will enjoy conversation. I have a much younger friend who has pretty intense social anxiety but somehow manages to push herself to do brave things like cycle around Iceland (in the summer), sing Christmas songs live on Facebook, and she's making me understand that when we don't give into fear, it gets weaker and weaker and although it doesn't leave altogether, it stops being what's in control. I figure I have maybe 20 good years left and I am sick of fear robbing me of adventure. So I have to commit to breaking old patterns and learning better skills. I wish the same for you and everyone else trying to live more courageously.

[@Jo-zx9fz]

@@HTNPSullivan all the best dear, do tell me whenever you get on plane, how was your experience

[@Alex-qr4co]

Have you tried some NLP techniques for overcoming phobias?

[@alissabbryce]

Thank you for your videos. I was having anxiety attacks while driving. Then the quarantine started and I didn't have to drive...and I just stopped (a huge mistake). Now I am trying to drive again and will try exposure therapy. I used to enjoy driving and hopefully can once again.

[@HTNPSullivan]

You might get some comfort from knowing so many people are stuck at home because of the pandemic, they also have gotten out of the habit of driving and feel some anxiety about anything beyond short trips. I've driven maybe 10 times since March and when I had to drive on the highway last month to make a hospital visit 35 miles away, I was so nervous the whole way there and back. So, I'm trying to get out more frequently!

[@annak48972]

I still don't have my driver's license because I have such bad anxiety over driving :(

[@jlove0311]

I have driving anxiety..I just got off the highway after trying exposure therapy...and working through it..just a few exits at a time

[@oumaimabenhzazi3115]

Can you give us an update 🙈

[@jlove0311]

@@oumaimabenhzazi3115 I went on vacation and came back...and MUCH IMPROVED.. I can drive on the highway again

[@andreeamanolache6319]

This human is simply a gift to humanity. I hope your life is as amazing and generous as you are.

[@Zainab-hz7sh]

I haven’t left my house in 2 months because I have panic attack when I was out , so I can’t do nothing in my life. I can’t even go to the shop down the road!! I really hope I can face my fear now. Thanks alot

[@garvitasingh29]

How are you doing now? ❤️

[@georgeaskew1]

Such a good breakdown of how it works. Sometimes I need to get out of my head and remember these points.

[@koala254]

I'm curious what is your phobia?

[@anteshchopra5472]

It took me half hour to make notes and watch the video. Gonna use it. Thanks dear. May god bless you. Keep up the good work

[@rachelsmename6]

I love this video and exposure therapy is something I plan to get started with for my performance anxiety when playing piano before othets. Something interesting I thpught about when watching your video is often the things we're afraid of are not really physically dangerous, but your fear of falling can realistically be something that can happen (a fall) if you make a mistake or don't know what you're doing. However, I can see how it's still important to overcome this fear when doing this sport is something that you enjoy doing and enjoy challenging yourself at harder climbs. Thank you for this video!

[@Lonewolf1961-s9z]

I want to say you are an amazing woman. Thank you for being on here and helping so many of us. You have such a calming voice. I could even imagine myself learning to rock climb with you. Heights is another of my phobias but I’ve come aways on this one. Thank you once again.❤

[@arpitkumar4525]

You are so wise. You are the only psychologist I know who really understands how the brain works and the pros and cons of each technique, why they work and why they don't.

[@caramellattenas9657]

the best therapist ever.. thank you so much.. i always put myself down.

[@ajinkyakale4391]

Step 1: Make a list of your fears Step 2: Make a goal Step 3: Make a fear ladder for one particular fear Step 4: Face your fears (repetition is important!) Step 5: Repeat Step 6: Reinforce your courage

[@Benjaminthemighty]

This is good stuff

[@ricoparadiso]

Does anyone know how many repetitions are needed before we see genuine progress? Iv consciously gone out to do this at least 6 times now, half of them were strictly social gatherings, the other were small cafe/restaurant setting. I know its not a lot but Iv really pushed myself and wondering how many more situations I need to create for myself before I get comfortable.

[@bangchan.___.skz1]

​@@ricoparadisoit's different for everyone if you wanna overcome it for the long term you should do it every month and then do it every week and then everyday

[@korereviews8088]

Can I ask a question? It seems like the examples everyone uses when explaining exposure thereapy are things like fear of water, or of flying etc. But these are phobias. To me, anxiety is a more generalized, vague sense of dread and foreboding - a gnawing feeling that follows you throughout the day, but often isn't really about anything in particular. How can exposure therapy be applied in this case - or can it?

[@Staceface_95]

I was thinking this too.

[@iforgot87872]

Try eating tons of salad every day. A healthy one with lots of raw greens. Not joking. It’s the best treatment for my generalized anxiety.

[@afifahabdulrahman177]

Ive read somewhere that this kind of therapy (exposure therapy) works best for ocd than for anxiety

[@Србомбоница86]

@@iforgot87872 i wish ,but raw salad hurts my stomach

[@turdfurguzin]

What do you do for existential dread or fear of death?

[@mrahzzz]

When "you can do hard things! Just keep breathing. :)" sets you off into an intense emotional moment, and sudden teary eyes... Wow... yeah, that's a sign that my anxieties have set me up to have a lot of limiting beliefs about myself that are *much* more serious than I realized, and that it may be a longer road ahead than I've been giving credit for (thanks avoidance). Thank you so much for this video. These are really helpful steps that I'm going to try to implement to work towards a better place. Thanks also for that encouragement. Coming from a pro who doesn't know me, but understands how brains work, that was shockingly encouraging and moving. I need more support than I realized...!

[@lxlamayw]

i really want to be a pediatric nurse, but i’m petrified of needles, i’ll try these tips and hopefully i’ll be able to carry through with it!! thank you!! xxx

[@nicknorizadeh4336]

You're brilliant! Way better than any therapist I've ever been to !

[@MrGavinmccolgan]

Thank you for this video, I was often doing my “exposure therapy” with the idea that I can just leave whenever I want or need to. Working on making the exposure therapy more valuable and forcing myself to sit through high anxiety and panic attacks

[@ThomasDoubting5]

I like facing fear as it is the cause of most anxiety if not all. That and memory and predicting outcomes rather than just being present

[@errediaz2904]

I'm in love with this woman. I have tons of anxiety issues, I try to fight them but sometimes I fail. This video is great, I got more information about how to deal with my shit with this 11 minutes that I got from tons of therapy hours with a bunch of people that never give me this tools. Thank you, I will subscribe, recommend and watch your videos. I'm in a rocky place right now but I'm sure you channel will help me tons. Pretty and smart. This is it guys.

[@katsura6616]

how much did it help ? Any updates ?

[@loahyvalley9797]

Wonderful video❣ Thank you for your great work❣💐

[@infinitegaming1015]

Hate driving on highways. I’m not scared of driving. I’m scared of having a panic attack. This video was very helpful

[@jlove0311]

How has that been for you?

[@infinitegaming1015]

@@jlove0311 better! Life is full of ups and downs.

[@jlove0311]

@@infinitegaming1015 True... I Jumped on the highway for abit.. Not too bad at first But it got a little bad.. Gonna work on it again tomorrow Just a little more at a timeI believe the Holy Spirit dropped in my heart to do exposure therapy..It came out of the blue..never heard of it beforeJust a little more at a time

[@infinitegaming1015]

@@jlove0311 glad to hear that you are trying. I’ll be praying for you. Remember one step at a time. The smallest victories helped me through it. It’s bound to happen again because we go through seasons. The more you go through the more you learn.

[@jlove0311]

@@infinitegaming1015 Thank you...please keep me in your prayers...

[@carolwhelihan1514]

I fear the actual feelings of anxiety, adrenaline rush, feeling scared, feeling hypervigilant, the worried feeling of doom and the future...so since i am afraid of all of these feelings, I keep them alive. Anxiety is so tough... i do challenge myself by doing things, socializing, work, etc, but many times the feeling persists, and I can't wait to be home in my apartment. I know this is a false sense of security as my world gets smaller, but for the "moment", I feel a sense of relief. Vicious cycle.

[@mounikas1]

Hello Emma, thank you so much for sharing these facts about Anxiety! I always wondered why i get anxious with a thought of doing something hard or making a business call, now I understood why my brain was using avoidance! I used to later criticize myself for not performing in a situation! Thank you for relieving me of this situation forever. I have been watching many of your videos and they are super helpful! I am going to tell myself “it’s not dangerous, it’s just hard and i can do hard things” 😊 thank you! Thank you for your willingness to share and please keep making more valuable videos like these👍🏼👍🏼

[@kevinbunn7915]

I have terrible anxiety sometimes when checking important emails or texts, and definitely talking on the phone or in person when I feel like something is on the line. I know why I avoid it, but have you found a way to make that easier? The problem is when the exposure has potential to turn out bad. With most phobias, when people do exposures the result is good and nothing bad happens. If you can let me know that’d be great!

[@KianaRonan]

THANK YOU. I really needed to see this. You have opened my eyes to the truth and spoke to my soul. I just made my list and I really hope I don't let myself down again. As I reflect on myself, I realize I have been using avoidance since 4th grade. As you can imagine my anxiety levels have only progressively gotten absolutely unbearable for me. So much so that I have been smoking weed way too much for 10 years now. It helps with the feeling of anxiety, but my life has been controlled by anxiety for so long now. Today I didn't smoke weed as soon as I woke up (because I do not have any at the moment) and I have realized how bad my anxiety has gotten. So bad that its hard for me just to go outside and be around others. I really hope that I can commit to my goals for once in my life. Thank you for helping me understand myself and providing methods to help with my anxiety disorder. THANK YOU.

[@bittersweetkark]

Thank you so much! I experience social anxiety that was so bad that it developed into agoraphobia that lasted a year. I've overcome a lot to where I can engage with people at work in novel situations and I can take the initiative even if it requires having conversations with people I perceive as intimidating. I still notice avoidance behavior in other areas of my life relating to social situations so this will be a fun way to order activities I want to do and expose my self to my fears.

[@yazeedk.1244]

same story

[@ethanmarroquin6003]

Same as me so bad but still manage to go out and i notice dt i dnt hv it alot.but still hv it

[@katsura6616]

any updates?

[@tammymccarthy1204]

I absolutely feel like you have been a huge inspiration as well as the knowledge you give for free is so rewarding to myself and family . Your voice is so soothing and you break it down perfectly . During this time in my life I have needed every bite of this . I will be taking all the paid classes . I’ve read reviews and I just believe you are not only amazing but a God send for ppl like myself who has been stuck as I have let the fear consume my life. This is where I am grateful for the internet . Thanks so much

[@olenazagovorycheva8485]

this is really one of the best explanation of ERP

[@silverriolu2705]

I'm impressed. I followed these steps to finish a task and it actually worked! Checking in helped the most

[@katiem6773]

Thank you for these videos. This one is so helpful. I think the "baby steps" technique is such a good idea.

[@yazeedk.1244]

thank you so much i wasn't know this therapy before you saving my life

[@runwiththewind3281]

Thank you for helping me understand me

[@hritiksingh1996]

You are helping millions of individuals through your informative videos! Thank you so very much. ❤️🙏

[@Generation-Faith]

but this exposure hierarchy is awesome. I am doing it currently. Sometimes I get disappointed because I feel like I can’t do the higher things right now, but just for the record, today I spoke with somebody for a while, having a decent conversation. I also talked to a new person today. I know I’m not at the place where I want to be, but I am getting there. Thank you again!

[@moen4645]

Thank you for this video Emma. I have been listening to various sources to explain this therapy technique and your video is by far the most comprehensive and clearly explained. Got it~🙌👏 Brilliant~

[@gcas91]

Such great advice and described in a beautiful, achievable way. Thank you 🙏🏼

[@rebeccaannette2139]

So grateful for all your videos! You really have such a wonderful way of breaking things down and make it so applicable to real life and how we can incorporate. Thank you, Emma!

[@oliviagoforth2857]

This was extremely helpful to explain the success that exposure therapy has to a client. Thank you! Definitely subscribing!

[@carldaniel118]

This is a really good video. I used to be able to push myself through the things I feared, but now, it leaves me paralyzed and unable to be productive and fulfill my responsibilities. I’d like to learn from this video, though. Very good information…

[@VBHB83]

I'm doing exposure therapy at the moment for fear of tall buildings. It's tough it's literally one step at a time but I've gone a few blocks and I'm working towards being able to see my partner at her work in the city. Keep fighting guys.

[@bunny_0288]

For a long time I have dealt with anxiety by avoiding things that make me anxious. At first it wasnt a big deal, but over the years my world has progressively gotten smaller and smaller and ai am avoiding more and more things. At first I was only anxious driving in heavy traffic and in areas where I wasnt familiar, so I avoided doing that as much as possible. But the anxiety only grew, and now I'm anxious about driving anywhere. Even 5 minutes away to the grocery store or coffee shop. I used to be anxious about having awkward social interactions. So I avoided situations like that. Now I'm anxious anytime I'm around people I don't know well. And the level of anxiety is much higher than it used to be. So where my anxiety level in social situations used to be maybe a 3-4, now that exact same situation is a 7-8. And this goes on and on. The more I avoided things, the more extreme my anxiety became which means the more and more stuff I had to avoid. So I'm switching gears and taking my life back. Yesterday, I went to a Ladies' Bible study at a new church I've been going to. I didn't know anyone that was there, and I had to drive myself. My heart was racing, and I was sweaty and physically trembling, but I did it! And I calmed down as I was there and actually really enjoyed it. My anxiety started at like an 8 when I got there and was at a 4 by the time I left. I'm so proud of myself! And I met a really nice girl there who asked for my number and invited me to dinner at her house on Tuesday with some of the other girls from the study. And while I'm a little anxious about it, I'm also excited. I've been really lonely, and I hope I can make some friends. And over time I know as I get more familiar with them my anxiety will lower.

[@laneymae]

It would be cool if there was an exposure work book with all the steps laid out ready to be filled with your specific fear.

[@cerealis_5432]

That would be amazing!!

[@funmix1014]

It's true for a constant old fear that you have. But deliberately bumping into bad or sad or negative news on media or social media will shoot ur anxiety level. May be avoidence is a good tool in case of listening to negative news all the times

[@siegfreidx1633]

I Thank you from the bottom of my heart , this video is very valuable to me

[@laynamonk4023]

Great video. It would be helpful if you made a video about how to deal with fearimg the bodily symptoms that comes during the panic attacks to the point where you become constantly hyper aware of your breathing or other symptoms.

[@bwinkle2915]

I’m working on this one. Sometimes I don’t realise how tied up I am and I have to try to tell myself to ignore them as they’ve become habit after over 40 years so I don’t think it’s going to happen overnight. I figured there will be some times where I miss but if I continue on hopefully I will get on top of it most times. There is so much learned behaviour.’ 40 something years and I found Emma on KZbin myself. I have never been pointed in the direction of CBT, breathing, mindfulness, anything like this before. I can only imagine what things could have been like had I known about this from the get go. I like Emma. I think it’s because I feel like she’s talking to us like she understands it and not out of a textbook

[@X13T91]

Hi there i admire what you doing for the mental illness community your content is so descriptive and accurate.alota people make treatments and exercises vague.. as to pay them to get there service you do it for free! Thank you ..god bless

[@milochamp1586]

Great video with awesome tips. The worse extreme fears to have are fear of certain types of people who are harmless, fear of objects, fear of certain numbers, names, fear of blind faith quotes coming true. . All these are created by humans, society, movies and cultures brainwashing a young sensitive kid.There is no actual physical threat in those fears. They are the worst because it's hard to avoid them as they are societal unless you stay in a comfort zone in side the house doing less. Main issue you have is that fear of feeling contaminated by these and believing life will be unpleasant if you face them. In reality that thought/feeling is not true. Best way to overcome such extreme fears it is make sure you have a job even if that job may cause a bit of those fears and hire a good therapist from your salary to work with you every week once or twice a week. If you continue after a year or two, you will overcome those worst fears and you should be crushing life again:)

[@noeestrada6708]

Thank you. I will practice these tips to overcome social anxiety.

[@PandaBazookaWarz]

I accidentally found this and instantly subbed. This channel seems like an awesome resource. :)

[@ayaal-sultan4030]

Thank you for this precious video.

[@ioannislazaridis4887]

Very well presented. Comprehensible and attainable process. Thank you very much.

[@jessicac8225]

What if my fear is my actual anxiety symptoms? I turn into a completely different person when my fight or flight is active and I hate it. Can't sleep, get angry, get so worked up that all the adrenaline is just going crazy, feel like someone is suffercating my brain and I can't think straight. Please help.

[@charliemaneh]

If you find the answer let me know please. because I literally dont have a life because of it. 21 and literally live in my bed. In my brother and sisters room.

[@ashleysutton1993]

Dr Claire weekes and Eckhart tolle will help x

[@BibleBlondie]

This is awesome thank you so much!!

[@Generation-Faith]

so I am working with a therapist, she is giving me EMDR treatment, I am also working on my severe social anxiety. There have actually been times where I’ve tried on my own to jump the gun and do the horrible scary activities that are a threat. This never ended well, every time I have disassociated and the trauma comes back

[@god5535]

This was very helpful. Thank you.

[@kobbyappiah2837]

Bless your heart Ma'am🙏🏾, You are a real life saver

[@chuckprindiville1246]

Emma, this vid speaks to me and I believe is exactly what I need. (much more than the Self Regulation process.) I’m stuck and have done hard things before but just got stuck in safety mode. Thank You!!

[@m3tbii]

I’m gonna beat my avoidant personality disorder. Thank you for this.

[@sandraromero2445]

Can this help with health anxiety? Thank you so much for all your helpful information.

[@theresa510mountain]

Yes, great question!!!!

[@dynamiclumbersolutions]

amazing video! I will do my best to follow all your tips, I have been struggling for many years.

[@leac9134]

Last year in September I suffered my very first Real Panic Attack , it came out of nowhere and it was really frightening, especially because i was driving and I feared for my 3 children who were in the car with me , (felt like i might lose control of the car ) It happened at a traffic light , and ever since then I’m scared to drive , and get really anxious being stuck at a red light . But Because I need to drive my kids to school every day and it’s a 20 min drive back and forth , I had no other choice but to take prescribed medication just to help me relax , however I can’t stay like this forever I feel like I’ll never be myself again and it’s really upsetting to me 😣 I should add I’ve been diagnosed with GAD but it’s never something I couldn’t handle before , i also meditate every day, which helps to some extent, I just want to enjoy driving and being in a car again .

[@Light-cy1gp]

see a psychologist, thats the best advice i could give u, if u dont like a specific psychologist then always feel free to get another psychologist which u like.

[@abi1]

Thank you, i just want to be free and live the life that i know i can have 😭😭💖💖💖💖💖💖

[@psicoexperta]

What a amazing video, thanks a lot

[@dogphobiatherapist]

Really helpful for anxiety sufferers!

[@browsebywire4096]

This is a great video. Puts it into words better than I can. Totally going to use this in my work. :)

[@TherapyinaNutshell]

Awesome, I work hard to make my videos clear and concise, it's making me a better therapist

[@kevinbunn7915]

My problem is the things I’m fearful of are real life external things that might turn out to be difficult to deal with or cause more anxiety. I know avoiding them makes it worse, but I don’t know what my responses usually are, so I don’t know what to prevent. Therefore, I don’t know how to make exposures easier moving forward. Examples of what I’m talking about are checking emails or texts when you’re anticipating something that might not turn out how you’d like. Or trying to ask somebody out on a date, and they might say no. I realize these are just facts of life, but when you have OCD and anxiety like I do it can seem overwhelming

[@carolynsager9922]

What about being scared of going to the doctor and getting my blood pressure taken?

[@andrewking8123]

Break it down, maybe drive to the doctors surgery, stay around the area until your anxiety goes down.. build up to it. Its normal to feel uncomfortable with each step it just means you are doing it right. Wait for the anxiety to good day ask yourself how anxious you are feeling from 0-100% watch your anxiety come down..then move onto the next level... you could even speak to your GP and explain to them what you are doing..so it you can build up to getting your blood preasure...I hope this helps (ps it really does work)

[@blondethai1956]

Do you do therapy online? I need to talk to someone but I live in Thailand.

[@chrisburgess7756]

Thanks

[@Arose444]

My gut feels like it's giving me a red flag even if I don't see a red flag, so I start to wonder if it's an intuitive reaction or just my fears. This is after dynamics with emotional abusive people. I want to understand how to trust my gut again so I can trust people around me when they are trust worthy. I'm going to try these tips here.

[@Headsavvy]

Can you say more about using mindfulness or grounding as avoidance? Thanks.

[@Maiden_Warrior_Crone]

This is SUCH great information. Thank you!

[@TorringtonFernandopulle]

Thank you very much for this video... really appreciated and very grateful to you 🙏

[@andrewbell8458]

I love these , Emma. Helped me so much.

[@syedfaizrasoolgillani7505]

You are way of delivering is excellent.

[@penelopepitstop197]

You make a lot of sense thank you 🇬🇧

[@flerma223]

Thank you so much for thesee wonderful videos, they really help me find hope in what seems like a hopeless situation:)

[@sleeptommorow5582]

Thank you so so much!!you are helping alot of ppl.I hope you are well yourself❤Thank you

[@Generation-Faith]

Thank you so much, I needed to hear this!

[@anthonywebb7486]

I love these videos , thank you there really helpful .

[@richardwilsonavena]

Id like to try this for performing music live as a solo artist. In the past, ive always had to have a bunch of drinks before I went on. I want to learn to perform sober as it is definitely the biggest phobia that is keeping me from truly living as id like to

[@chrismarklowitz1001]

The more specific you can be the better. If you have social anxiety maybe you dont have anxiety just about taking to people but that they will yell at you. And if that's the case exposing yourself just to a social situation wont work. You have to expose yourself to the actual fear which is being yelled at and embarrassed. Otherwise you may get stuck in avoidance of telling yourself "it won't happen" Instead of experiencing it like it's actually happening. And experiencing the pain

[@ylmonkeyU2]

Thank you so much.

[@user-kp6ss8sx8m]

Thank you for this video. It is really helpful!!!

[@jennifercapili5384]

Thank you for sharing this video. You truly helps a lot...God Bless you...🙂❤

[@MineshBaxiYT]

Best video on this topic, thanks

[@PJ-rn4cm]

Awesome videos - simple and effective thanks for sharing 💜

[@bigtimetraderjaquay8321]

Thanks for the advice i definitely going to try it

[@TheBaldyheed]

I seem to always reach a point where no matter what I do the panic just takes over and I have to give in to it ☹️ I have been doing exposure therapy for a fear of heights and open spaces and no matter how many times I go up I always reach a point where I just have to get down. I love hiking with an incredible passion and although I still manage to have a wonderful time and view some wonderful sights I can never get to the top of a peak/mountain, the fact that nothing is around me to break up my vision and i feel so in danger of something happening and falling into the sky (i know that sounds crazy but at the time it is incredibly real) I find I go into a complete panic, I have tried and tried and tried to gradually ease myself up higher and higher but it always ends up in the same scenario. I'm not sure what I'm doing wrong as I seem to do all the things suggested in these vids but I can't get to the top. On Saturday I climbed a mountain and walked along just shy of the ridgeline for 2 hours but then out the blue it kicks in and the fear just completely overrides all rationality and I have to decent as quickly as possible. It's so frustrating as I would love to be a tour/hike guide but I can't pursue my passion because of this fear 😔 can anyone offer any kind of advice/suggestions/exercises etc. I would be so so grateful 🙏🏼 thank you 😊

[@jenajohnson1647]

Reach out to therapist trained in exposure therapy, it's sometimes possible to do this on your own but not always. Professional support can make all the difference. Don't give up!

[@d.w952]

I've been doing this without really knowing it. I have a really bad fear of cockroaches, I am the type of person who loves to be clean and cleanliness in general so they are the one bug I can't stand because they are associated with filth (I'm not bothered by any other insects or whatever). Lately I have gotten better in small steps like you say, first was to not scream when I see one, second was to not immediately look away or get out of the room, third was to calmly acknowledge there is a cockroach and calmly ask my boyfriend to get rid of it for me rather than being panicked. I have already got less fear, it used to be that the sight of one, even online or just looking at the word "cockroach" made me involuntarily shudder and freeze up. Now I can notice them but not freak out even though I still hate them - I don't get that jolt in my chest most of the time anymore. Fourth step was today when I found one but I was home alone, I had put a cup over it because I don't like killing anything but was going to wait for my boyfriend to get home so he could get rid of it. But I decided that I would stop being scared because I know really they are harmless individually and pretty common where I live anyhow. I spent a few minutes watching it in the cup until I felt okay with it then took it outside and released it. My next step is to get comfortable with trapping and releasing them on my own and then after that, to dial down my hygiene response because even though I never once touch them I feel the impulse to wash my hands several times after "just in case". Then I will work on being able to touch them and eventually get to the point where I can pick it up and put it outside like I would with any other bug instead of using a cup and paper.

[@icameinlikeawreckingball2504]

Wow! Lucky you. I have a deep fear of them since I was 5, and I cannot overcome that! I’ve tried so many times, but every time I see one my body shakes and I keep screaming and crying for minutes, I thought about going to therapist but I don’t want that because I know at some point of time I will have to see one and kill it with myself, which is almost impossible to me. I don’t think there’s anything scary on earth like them, even snakes. The moment i see one I wish I could die, it even was hard for me to write that comment.

[@go_better]

Thanks! It's quite inspiring actually!

[@lal8997]

What’s the difference between avoidance and not jumping in too fast? Thank you so much for your informative videos!!

[@kevinbunn7915]

I bet you could figure that out, but your brain is probably posing that question to rationalize avoidance. No offense, I could be very wrong, but that’s what I do

[@HarryPotter-bj6iy]

Thanks Emma

[@airamercs5124]

I just want to tell you, Thank you so much :’)

[@irene81]

Hello! I don't want to overstep but I was wondering if you could possibly explain briefly how this would work with more abstract fears: not having a job in the future, not being loved, not being valued... I can see myself trying with, for example, self-image problems, but I don't know how to apply this to abstract fears.

[@ganbatte1260]

Hi irene, maybe a bit late to your question. Do you experienced those now? How is it going btw? I used to have those perception in past few years and im so helpless. Didnt have any job, friends, not being loved. I have abnormality that will let someone humiliate me, and that brings me fear & heavy social anxiety, and it is still going today. Thats why i kept my life shut alone. But i know i cant be like this anymore, i have to change. the thing that keeps me motivated is that what exactly what i want to do in this world, i take my first action to got employed by a new company. And after 3 months of searching, i got a new job. Its been 3 years since my last work. I still find it hard to cope with my anxiety and my abnormality, i feel fear & depressed everyday but i keep going. Still, i am finding someone i love, im not good at this but i keep finding one. But i believe if we take the first action, no matter how good or bad it is, purpose will follow :) i hope i can help you

[@bria7885]

It's just about trusting yourself. Put yourself out there and get into a relationship even though you're scared your trust will be broken. Apply to multiple jobs to get over your fear of failure. It works. Over time you will become more confident and failure doesn't hurt like it used to. You will succeed. Pray to God.

[@sempraktis1597]

Thank you very much

[@chrismarklowitz1001]

How can I... I might expose myself to being social but my brain is still continuiosaly anxious in my mind I"m htinking that they secretly hate me. like my thoughts explain the situation to fit my anxiety and reinforc it

[@yuliaspesivtseva8521]

I think you can ask a random person what he/she is really thinking about you. Of course, it depends on your mentality but I think that the answer will be honest. As a photographer a often look at people and notice how beautiful eyes they have for example. But if you notice that I’m looking at you with attention you can think that something is wrong. When it’s not :) Hope it’s clear