The Heartbreaking Truth: Where Have I Been?

Рет қаралды 178,718

Жыл бұрын

#dressmaking
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I hope this video is not too sad and depressing to watch, but I wanted to explain where I have been for the last few months! My darling husband sadly passed away at the end of March and my world has changed forever! I am trying to come to terms with my grief and be strong for John! Here is my story!
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Пікірлер: 1 800

@stevieray7203 Жыл бұрын

I just stumbled upon this video. I am so sorry for your loss. Sending you prayers 💛🙏🏻

@meme7591 11 ай бұрын

Me to this video just was on my feet I'm very sorry❤

@viviannefraser5974 11 ай бұрын

Same here!!!

@heidi9731 11 ай бұрын

Yes, first time seeing this channel and my heart just breaks for her/you. 💔💞 And her desire to move away to some remote place and just live out her life quietly in the wake of her husband's passing resonates so much with me. That would very likely be me if my husband passed. Bless her and prayers!!

@artist169 11 ай бұрын

So sorry for your loss x

@sallyr4057 11 ай бұрын

Same here! What an eloquent, lovely lady. So sorry for your loss. One foot in front of the other is all you can do right now. It’s very very early days. Sending love x

@edieparastatides9403 11 ай бұрын

I lost my husband when I was 50. Out of the blue. It has now been 26 years. I finally realized it was like I missed the bus and he got on. So I decided I needed to keep myself busy until I catch the bus myself. I love that you are picking up your sewing again. It tells me that you WILL make it! 😘🤗

@dr.christopherjohnson4840 11 ай бұрын

Hello, I hope you're safe over there? I hope this year brings happiness, prosperity, love 💚 , and peace all over the world 🌏. I would love us to be good friends in honesty and in trust so as time goes on it will bring something great for us in the future, hope you don't mind?. I'm Doctor Christopher Johnson from San Francisco, California, where are you from if I may ask?❤

@crafteed 10 ай бұрын

I love the bus analogy. We all have to catch the bus at some point.

@lisa-mariegray5510 6 ай бұрын

Hi Edie, here I am again 8 months after I commented on Jayne's video. I really like your comment. I have decided, like you, to keep busy 'til its my time to catch the bus. Sending you much love xxxooo

@marionmorgan8634 10 ай бұрын

“Grief is love with nowhere to go” take each day as it comes lovely girl❤❤

@AussieHeyJude 11 ай бұрын

One step at a time…. no rush, no apologies, no stress…. Just one foot in front of the other ❤

@suzanneburns2931 11 ай бұрын

Such wise advice .

@sharonmonson1510 11 ай бұрын

My deepest condolences, I lost my hubby recently. One foot in front of the other, when you can, no need to think about anyone else, do whatever feels right at any moment. I learnt to say ‘no’ and put myself first for the time being anyway. I’m heartbroken for you…it’s a tough road losing your special person.

@dr.christopherjohnson4840 11 ай бұрын

@@sharonmonson1510 Hi Sharon, how are you doing?

@leeannekaden2600 Жыл бұрын

I lost my husband at age 57 also. I'm 84 years now. I still remember crying in grocery store. Crying everywhere. Gardening helped me. I remember Thank you for sharing. Glad your parents are near you.

@smileytow1925 11 ай бұрын

Today is 35 years since my dad passed away, my mom was 55 years old, she turned 56 3 weeks after he passed. She was almost 91 when she passed away at the end of May this year. They are finally together…. ❤️🙏

@mungbean345 11 ай бұрын

@@dr.christopherjohnson4840 You sound like a scammer. Leave the grieving lady alone and honor your own mother by finding lawful employment.

@freidafree810 10 ай бұрын

@@mungbean345 ...hit the three dots at the right of his entry and turn him in...i did...

@barbarawarner4645 11 ай бұрын

Don’t let anyone tell you how to grieve. The goal isn’t recovery, it’s adjustment and that takes a lot of time. Your tears are a tribute to the love you two shared. My advice is just to let yourself grieve but do do something every day. Sounds like you are doing that. I am so sorry that you have to endure this loss and the pain. ❤️

@lizzieb6311 11 ай бұрын

Sage words of wisdom

@iamdawt 10 ай бұрын

"The goal isn't recovery, it's adjustment..." really struck a chord with me. Thank you for that.

@XrazorstylistXOXO 11 ай бұрын

My hubby crossed over in June. He was in the last stage of a Young Alzheimer's. We were together for 29 years. He was 55. He was the world to me and my best friend. Am 53. I have no living children. My son crossed over in 2008 he was 19. My life is changing so fast. It's just me. It looks so scary dating again. But it looks scary being alone. Many 🙏's and hugs ❤ TFS

@sheilaathay2034 11 ай бұрын

🫂😢💔🙏💖

@dr.christopherjohnson4840 11 ай бұрын

@Cynthia2v 2 ай бұрын

I’m so sorry for your losses. I was the same age (and my husband was 56) when he passed. Some days, it’s all you can do to breathe. Take each day as it comes. May the Lord give you comfort.

@cindyclark3318 11 ай бұрын

I'm so sorry! My husband died 21 months ago. I count it out month by month. I am doing better. I'm not crying all the time. It's hard, but it does get better. The first year goes by in a fog. Take your time. Grief is personal. Take care, dear. Get plugged into church if you have one. It will help to not be so stuck in your head.

@djparrish2053 11 ай бұрын

My husband passed away five years ago when I was 59. It’s more difficult losing one’s partner than anyone can imagine who hasn’t gone through it. It never gets easy, but it does get easier. Everyone’s grief is on their own timeline. I know about the “hermit” thing. I did that for awhile. Just take everything the way you want to. Don’t let anyone else tell you how to grieve. The thing that helps me is that I will see him again someday.

@chrispeterson3647 11 ай бұрын

...and you WILL

@gingertea5006 11 ай бұрын

I understand completely how you feel my dear. I went through it also and had a toddler and a baby. He wasn't sick at all, he was killed by a drunk driver. I also wanted to isolate and never speak to anyone. I am a quilter and sewing was like therapy for me and helped me through the pain and grief. Everything was hard without him. I am glad that your parents are close by, I'm sure that is a comfort to you.

@janemulvenna9598 18 күн бұрын

Prayers for your dreadful loss too. Keep going. You’ll be reunited eventually. God bless.x

@lolMax1 11 ай бұрын

Hello, I cared for my husband for most of our marriage until he passed. I was 34 and we had two young teenagers when he went, I am 54 now. We shared so many amazing times and I learned to take each day at a time. Please do not think you are going mad, I cried over a dinner plate. Take your time and follow what you feel is right for you. Take care of you, 🙂

@DanaK817 11 ай бұрын

I stumbled across this video on the 2 yr anniversary of my little Sister's passing. She was my person, my best friend. She was 46 and passed suddenly from a brain aneurysm. But she was my brother in law's everything. They were childhood sweethearts since age 12. He has said every single word you just said. My heart breaks for you. I rekindled my love for sewing after her passing to keep myself busy so finding your video was meant to be. Sending you love and prayers.

@libbykilpatrick1578 Жыл бұрын

Jayne, John cherished you, try to honour him and how he lived his life by waking up in the morning and trying your hardest to say each day 'I am doing this for you John'. He was and will be very proud of your achievements. You are a strong woman continue to work on that legacy that John helped you create. Your work on here is a small part of that but you touch the lives of a lot of people with your sewing patterns and your tutorials. Everyone is different you need to take as long as you need.....but you have a lot more to give in every aspect of your life. Take care much love and respect. X

@barbarathefirst 11 ай бұрын

Thanks so much for you candor. My daughter, Claire, died 10 years ago at the age of 23--a blood clot to her lung. I really don't know how we got through it. I can relate to everything you said. I'll never get "over" it but I've learned to live with it. You are not alone and thank you so much for having the courage to make and share this video. It means more than you can know to so many!

@MissMala 11 ай бұрын

😥

@wildrose156 11 ай бұрын

I'm so sorry dear one. I am 71 and know either myself or my husband of 51 years are going to face this. I can't imagine the emptiness and sorrow and being so lost. You are in my prayers.

@dr.christopherjohnson4840 11 ай бұрын

@doreenwalden4918 11 ай бұрын

Bless you. I was widowed at 40, my late husband, John, died on a treadmill. His heart, bless him, gave out. I felt the same, everything you said, the way you felt, feel, even the age gap. 15 years on, I’ve re married to a totally different person and I’m happy. John is with me every single day without fail. Don’t beat yourself up. Grief is as individual as we are. You WILL get there, wherever that is. Your in my prayers. D xxxx

@alanaxstitcher8403 11 ай бұрын

I lost my husband 10 years ago. I couldn’t watch this video but I’m thinking of you. It never goes away but the pain becomes a smaller part of the pie and you eventually start to think of the nice fun wonderful things more often than the sad terrible things.

@galady8632 11 ай бұрын

My most sincere condolences for your loss. Obviously John was an outstanding man. You two were indeed fortunate to have found one another and share 30 wonderful years together. Due to a horseback riding accident I was advised I could not have children so I decided I would never marry. Both my parents were disabled, seven years apart. They were in their forties. Each passed in my arms. For over twenty years I had focused on them. Suddenly I had no one to bathe, dress, medicate, take to medical appointments, shop for, cook for, pay their bills, etc. I was 49 and totally lost. I had zero purpose. My grief counselor told me there's no shame in crying. Tears are cleansing. The depth of our grief is directly related to the depth of our love and loss. Once I processed those pearls of wisdom I slowly started my journey towards living my 'new normal'. I was 42 when I lost Daddy, 49 when I lost Mother. I will be 73 this month. They remain my very best friends in addition to being wonderful parents. Each and every day we had was a treasure. They are always with me. John will always be with you.

@LilyGazou 11 ай бұрын

Your life is full of love. 🌺

@dr.christopherjohnson4840 11 ай бұрын

@Macasmum 11 ай бұрын

You are making John proud. So very brave. Blessings and hugs from Australia.👩‍🌾👩‍🌾👩‍🌾

@kc9178 11 ай бұрын

My cousin in England sent me a link to this video post as I am grieving the devastating loss of my husband (3 months ago now). He was 30 years my senior. I too went from living at home to living with my incredible husband and we too were inseparable (for 41 years) and only ever had each others best interests at heart. The heart break of him "gone" is palpable. I feel exactly as you do and feel Iost even though he had everything so organized and laid out for me to make my life easier knowing he would be leaving me alone one day (I started to cry writing this). I finally joined a grief group that hospice provides free for anyone and it helps somewhat as I see people of all ages that have lost the love of their life too and feel that same agonizing pain. Misery loves company I suppose in the end. We share a grief because of a love so intense. I have a massive crevasse in my heart that feels like it will never close.

@jeanetteh.9240 11 ай бұрын

The crevasse will remain for quite a while my friend, and gradually form a scab of sorts. Healing such a wound takes a long time. Be patient and loving with yourself, even if others are urging you to move on. Just tell them that you are doing the best you can.

@nancyritland9116 11 ай бұрын

yes...................i know how you feel........except, i was left completely unprepared, with no computer skills. I have had so much to learn.........It is very important to have your emotions validated, and to spend time with trusted people who understand.......................and yes it will get better. It has taken me 5 years.....but there is light at the end of the tunnel

@michellewaters1246 Жыл бұрын

I am so sorry for your loss. I can’t imagine how hard this must be for you. I am glad you shared your thoughts with us. 💕

@lindacornelius3451 11 ай бұрын

Thank you for sharing. You are grieving just the way you should. Everyone is different. You are doing great!!

@dr.christopherjohnson4840 11 ай бұрын

@kathybailey1821 11 ай бұрын

I’m 68 and lost my husband to a tragic fall that broke his neck and he lived 4 days. I feel your pain and I understand all of the emotions you are going through. It’s been a year and five months. What we know in our head doesn’t always transfer to the heart. Hugs and prayers.

@monicaboswell2806 11 ай бұрын

My sister lost her husband 3 years ago. She joined a widows group and started going back to church. She goes on senior trips and hangs out with the ladies she's met at the widows group. She misses terribly. Prayers for peace and comfort.

@kathleenmacdonald5511 11 ай бұрын

Your husband was just as blessed to have you as you were to have him. What a gift God gave to you both. Believe me, it is rare in this world. I am 63 and can honestly say I have never had the love you two shared together, and to still have your parents alive? God really loves and cares for you. Please be comforted that you are this blessed.

@dr.christopherjohnson4840 11 ай бұрын

@connieslappey3762 11 ай бұрын

I lost my husband of 33 years at the age of 50. It hasn’t been easy but I took it day by day. I have come a long way but still miss him everyday! Sending prayers!

@dr.christopherjohnson4840 11 ай бұрын

@susanlamb7431 Жыл бұрын

In a world of fakery it is very sobering to see someone being real. You are so brave. It was only by chance I came to your channel and was feeling cynical about the title of the content until I watched ! Apart from looking intriguing from the setting as I’m also a designer, I was deeply moved by your testimony and can only wish you strength and hope to get through such a terrible loss, You are clearly very talented in your own right and as unbearable as it seems right now, you will perhaps allow yourself time to reconfigure this new lifestyle. Prayers for you and wishing you every success in overcoming but not forgetting.

@dawnclarke1298 11 ай бұрын

Hi, I have just watched your video for the first time as I am learning to sew. I felt compelled to comment and send my sincere condolences. I lost my lovely brother two years ago to septis. My lovely brother and in law were together for 44 years. My sister in law was only 62 years old and listening to your lovely words, was like listening to my sister in law, two years ago. She too felt lost without my brother and was also grief stricken. Please don't hide your tears, as people understand and want to support you. My sister in law has began to build a life for herself, that she never thought was possible. Take baby steps and each day at a time . Your lovely husband would be so proud of you. Sending you prayers 🙏

@elisabethm9655 11 ай бұрын

As a widow, my heart hears your heart. Theses are the darkest of days. What you’re experiencing is normal. You’re doing quite well from what you’re sharing, but I can see it hurts so very much - don’t let anyone tell you how to grieve, or what proper timeline should be. May you blessed with the joys in the core of your memories. Find your solace in every healthy way you can and live. Just live. One moment at a time … and the days will fly. One day you’ll feel the smile return. ❤

@SewnontheTyne Жыл бұрын

Sending you the biggest hug. What a brave video to film - John will be so proud of you, as he always was and always will be xxxx

@jeanlinder1310 Жыл бұрын

I know the pride of a stranger can be an odd thing, but I am so very proud of you. You're doing all the right things to take care of yourself-- the gym, the trying new things, the creative work you do-- and you're not rushing anything. Sending you love and support and hugs from Pittsburgh, PA, USA.

@RM-ee9zk 11 ай бұрын

Ah, yes. You remind me that in the beginning of the widow's journey there is a lot of adrenaline. At least that's what I've decided upon. Then, things slowed down at some point for me and I ended up as a recluse for a time. Please don't be concerned if this happens. I'm still there but I know it's just for a season.

@dr.christopherjohnson4840 11 ай бұрын

@seashell4327 11 ай бұрын

Words cannot express my sympathy for your loss. At the same time, you were so immensely blessed to have had such a wonderful husband and marriage.

@dr.christopherjohnson4840 11 ай бұрын

@danabinaz3173 11 ай бұрын

Ah. I’m learning that in our 50s (I’m 57) we are forced to say goodbye to loved ones and it’s never easy. It’s hard and you carry the pain from here on out. ❤

@dr.christopherjohnson4840 11 ай бұрын

@Sewsew60 Жыл бұрын

Oh Jayne,I’m so sorry to hear about the sad loss of John. My deepest condolences to you. And your family!

@dr.christopherjohnson4840 11 ай бұрын

Hello, I hope you're safe over there? I hope this year brings happiness, prosperity, love 💚 , and peace all over the world. I would love us to be good friends in honesty and in trust so as time goes on it will bring something great for us in the future, hope you don't mind?. I'm Doctor Christopher Johnson from San Francisco, California, where are you from if I may ask?

@bettylawrence9724 Жыл бұрын

I’m praying for your strength as you go through this difficult time ❤️🙏🏽

@marydray6171 11 ай бұрын

“You keep track of all my sorrows. You have collected all my tears in your bottle. You have recorded each one in your book.” Ps 56:8

@MsLilywren 11 ай бұрын

Gosh, this has been no time at all for you

@RissyMH 11 ай бұрын

Grief is so painful. It’s unique to each of us. Listening to how hard you are working to keep yourself connected to others and the world….i think your husband ,John, is very proud of you. One foot i front of the other. Hugs

@suzanneburns2931 11 ай бұрын

You can do this , I lost my husband five years ago , you’ll never forget him , but you will go on . Blessings .❤️

@nancy-acronesintuition4614 11 ай бұрын

Your video just popped up in my feed. Remarkably your story sounds so like my own. My precious husband of 42 years passed on March 1st this year of sepsis. My only comfort is that he is no longer in pain and suffering. Sending you love and praying you can find some small measure of peace. 🙏💝

@dr.christopherjohnson4840 11 ай бұрын

@jennifermorrison229 11 ай бұрын

I’m so very sorry you’ve lost your beautiful husband. You are in my prayers. He’s just beyond the veil. You can still talk to him. I’m sure he’ll be watching over you.

@joanneblair2087 Жыл бұрын

I am so sorry for your loss. There are no words that can express. Hugs to you.

@dr.christopherjohnson4840 11 ай бұрын

Hello, I hope you're safe over there? I hope this year brings happiness, prosperity, love, and peace all over the world. I would love us to be good friends in honesty and in trust so as time goes on it will bring something great for us in the future, hope you don't mind?. I'm Doctor Christopher Johnson from San Francisco, California, where are you from if I may ask

@yvonneduffy6812 11 ай бұрын

The same thing happened to me, everything changed in a blink of an eye after 36 years of marriage, I was engaged at 18 and married at 19. I was 55 when he died. The first year is the worst. I was determined not to become bitter and to be grateful for what I had had with him as so many never have that. Hang in there, thinking of you with love ❤

@dr.christopherjohnson4840 11 ай бұрын

@bettherndon7229 11 ай бұрын

My husband died almost 13 years ago when I was 55, he was 57. Like you, I had never lived on my own. I called the first six months "The Deep Fog". I thought I was getting through the days as well as I could, but when I look back, there are gaps of time that I have no memory of. It would have been so easy to curl up and do nothing, but I realized that was not testament to his life and our life together. After 3 months, I pushed myself and started deep cleaning and organizing my house, but my sewing/quilting kept my mind in the present. I have a 8 to 4, Monday - Friday job which kept me busy during the day, but coming home to an empty house was depilating. I set up a sewing table in the TV room and sewed every night (finished a lot of UFO's). Great therapy! My moto now is, "one foot in front of the other and keep moving forward". Even after almost 13 years, there are good days and not so good days. I miss him everyday and that will never change. By the way, I spent 2 weeks in Scotland in April. Spent 2 night at Gleneagles, then 10 nights in Fort Augustus, 2 nights in Edinburgh. When you mentioned Isle of Skye, it brought back wonderful memories. Beautiful and very remote. Take care and let yourself feel everything and begin to heal.

@alexisrodriguez4541 11 ай бұрын

I just wish I could reach into the screen and give you a big hug. I am so proud of you. I cannot express how much I feel for your loss.

@user-hs9qz3dg1l 11 ай бұрын

My first time ever seeing you on KZbin. You are a very brave lady. Please know that grief is extremely hard work!! Not one thing is easy about it! You had the blessing of having a husband that you love wholeheartedly…That is a lot to be thankful for!! It is always better to have loved than to have loved not!!! I am also a dressmaker of 50 years. Started making money with my sewing at the age of 12. I have been on my own now for over 32 years…it’s one day at a time. You will do fine…one day at a time! Be thankful for the wonderful times you and John had together…. Believe it or not, to have had a wonderful husband is a tremendous life experience to be thankful for. Your grief now is a living testament to the lovely marriage you had…. Be gentle with yourself. You will do fine. You are a strong lady!

@dr.christopherjohnson4840 11 ай бұрын

@jacquis-j9606 Жыл бұрын

My heart breaks for you. Your love for John is so evident in every word you said. Be kind to yourself and give yourself the time you need. Sending hugs

@dr.christopherjohnson4840 11 ай бұрын

@gigistrus490 11 ай бұрын

I pretended that they weren't really dead, just "not here" at the moment. Then I decided that I would live for them and I would do and experience everything I could, always thinking of them and hoping I'm doing what they missed out on and hope that I can honor their life in so doing that.

@dr.christopherjohnson4840 11 ай бұрын

@vicki1141 11 ай бұрын

Your video just popped up when I opened my tablet while having coffee in bed with my two new girls (Ivy and Lily, 16 week old kittens). You are brave to be sharing your loss with your followers and the outside world. I relate so well to your feelings and thoughts as you move through your grief. Being in touch with your feelings or lack of them is so important. Its not even one day at a time , its more like one breath at a time. I know all too well how that feels, having come through the suicide of my youngest and dearest brother just 11 short years ago. You my dear are coping in a healthy way by adding new activities to your life. I did nothing but lay on the sofa for the first year trying to shut out the pain. I applaud you for pushing yourself through each day of this journey. Loss is a journey so personal to each of us and even with family and friends to lein on , it all comes down to our own inner strength. I can clearly see your incredible strength and wisdom. Sadly , time does not heal, as most say. We just learn to live our lives around the void . I send you hugs, prayers and light from Nova Scotia. ❤

@karenbutnotthatkaren5528 11 ай бұрын

I couldn't agree more - you took the garbled thoughts that were in my head and wrote a most eloquent message out of them. I can only hope to be nearly as wise as this grieving woman if I ever have another in my life to lose, and you most certainly expressed the thoughtfulness she so deserves. May you and the kittens enjoy a beautiful life together. Karen

@vicki1141 11 ай бұрын

@@karenbutnotthatkaren5528 thank you for your words as well. We never truly know how strong we are until we have to face the worst experience of our time here. I wish you happy and fullfilling days in your future as well. Fur babies always bring joy. Vicki , in Nova Scotia

@jennistevenson796 Жыл бұрын

Jayne this was a beautiful vlog and you are such an inspiration. It is so very early in your grief ( I’m afraid the truth is it takes years to adjust) and yet the wonderful strong sensible woman you are that supported John so loyally and lovingly for all those years, you know how to support yourself now at this terribly hard change in your life ,and creativity can be so soothing. Treat yourself how you treated John. With gentle love, care and humour. Look after yourself. Your love was a beautiful thing and love never dies. Your grief is also beautiful although so hard to live with. John will never be forgotten. I hope I haven’t said anything wrong. You are not alone, take care of yourself Jayne xx

@debrapahl7573 11 ай бұрын

❤😢

@dr.christopherjohnson4840 11 ай бұрын

@mphailey1 Жыл бұрын

Jayne, I am so sorry for your terrible loss - thank you for letting us know…. I am praying for your strength - like you said, it’s day to day xoxo

@dr.christopherjohnson4840 11 ай бұрын

@christinaharrison5823 11 ай бұрын

I’m so sorry about your dear husbands passing. I pray for continued strength for you daily 💜🙏

@joanndelaini5885 11 ай бұрын

June 3 I lost my husband unexpectedly. In 1 month we would have been married 50 years; together for 52. Our sons and I were with him, thank God. You have said it all. I am devastated and completely understand your struggle. We will never be the same again, nothing will be. I am trying to make myself leave the house. Need groceries but don't want to go out and see people. Your comment "The lights are on, but nobody's home" is exactly how I feel. At 72 I don't know where to go, what to do. I will be thinking of you.

@destinysisco3142 11 ай бұрын

What a huge blessing to have those experiences for so long...most will never have that. He's not really gone...energy is different.

@dr.christopherjohnson4840 11 ай бұрын

@elainearchbold259 11 ай бұрын

IM SO SORRY FOR YOUR LOSS. IVE SUBSCRIBED TO YOUR CHANNEL AND HOPE EVERYONE SUPPORTS YOU THROUGH THIS TERRIBLE TIME. TAKE CARE AND GOD BLESS X

@dr.christopherjohnson4840 11 ай бұрын

@JulieNick28 11 ай бұрын

Give yourself GRACE ❤. You’ll figure it out, there is no rush. Sounds like you are taking great steps.

@dr.christopherjohnson4840 11 ай бұрын

@eileenmacdougall8945 10 ай бұрын

I have no words for you that could help, but you and yours will very much be in my prayers.

@dee4174 Жыл бұрын

May I offer you my deepest sympathy. I am so sorry that you have lost the love of your life. This was a brave video to share. You did so well to control the tears. We are in a season of grief too at the moment so please know that you have helped at least one person by sharing your heart. ❤

@dr.christopherjohnson4840 11 ай бұрын

@victoriah.2083 Жыл бұрын

So, so sorry for your loss. And I don't say that lightly. I truly mean that. When my father died at 66 my mother joined a Grieving Spouse group to talk with someone who could understand what it meant to feel such a profound loss. That, along with her Faith, really helped. Well, and me, also. They had been childhood sweethearts at ages 13 and 14. And were together for 3 years until circumstances split them apart. They both married others and were separated when they met again. It was like time had stood still. They finally married at age 29 and 30.(TMI to go into why they had to wait so long. They would have married within 6 mos of finding each other again.) Anyway, my mother never remarried and passed at 92. She said why try with the rest when you've had the best. My maternal grandmother had said the same. With great love comes great loss. It will never be the same without John. It will just be a new normal. That doesn't mean you can't find joy and happiness, it just means the sharing part will be missing. Well, it feels like it's missing. He will always be with you, but in a different way. Love never dies. It changes shape and color and form but it is always there. I am not trying to say anything pat or perfunctory. I just want you to know I understand your loss. I am sending a virtual hug from across the puddle.

@KnappKnits 10 ай бұрын

How brave of you to share this with the world. I'm so sorry to hear of your devastating loss. Sending you love from Cornwall.

@wildfireintexas 10 ай бұрын

I am so sorry. God Bless you and your family and for your husband, eternal rest grant unto him, may perpetual light shine upon him, may he rest in peace.

@2joanier Жыл бұрын

Thanking you for sharing your grief with us, Jayne. It is such a crushing, beautiful and intimate thing. I lost my husband 7 years ago. He, too, was 22 years older than I and we had been married for 30 years. I was 61 years old at the time. He was the love of my life and my best friend. Your grief will last as long as it lasts and that’s how long it needs to last. The only antidote at all is time and even then you will never stop missing him. It will just change with time and the memories will become sweeter and not so devastating and anguishing to remember. Be gentle with yourself and allow the grief to do its work as long as it needs to. What an honor we had to have such wonderful husbands, so wise, and who loved us so much. One.step.at.a.time.

@dr.christopherjohnson4840 11 ай бұрын

@yvonnewebb5037 11 ай бұрын

Your video just popped up on my feed. I am so sorry for your loss. I can't imagine how you must feel after losing your beloved husband, but you are already on the right path. Continue doing all the things you mentioned, I believe John's spirit is right there with you every day. Your fur babies and gardening is good therapy too. God bless you. ❤️🤗

@pamj2395 11 ай бұрын

It is good that you are trying things new. Blessings to you. 🙏🏻💙✝️

@dr.christopherjohnson4840 11 ай бұрын

@phendrahend9530 11 ай бұрын

I also lost my husband, quickly and unexpectedly. That was a long time ago, it took me years to start to feel like I might live again. Everyone heals and grieves differently, so take however long it takes, no matter how long that is. My sympathies for you.

@stephanieborkin7087 11 ай бұрын

I was widowed at 43, unexpectedly and it’s now been 15 years. I don’t know how I got here, as “widow brain”‘comes and goes. Just know that what you are feeling is 100% normal. There is no right or wrong on the grief journey - but, it’s your journey, so just continue to take it day by day. ♥️ P.S. Going to the market was absolutely dreadful for me, as well.

@dr.christopherjohnson4840 11 ай бұрын

@cheryljanicki9359 Жыл бұрын

Oh Jayne, you sweet soul,, he IS so proud of you,, hugs , love and 🙏

@lauraquigley6403 11 ай бұрын

On the Island their are two beautiful people that moved there. They are both very creative! I am a young widow 59 now raised my daughter by myself since she was 7! 🙏🙏🙏Blessing’s

@lulabuzz6756 11 ай бұрын

13 weeks is no time at all. Take care go gently. I’m a widow too, my beloved died in 2021. It’s a tough journey. ❤

@Leemar9 Жыл бұрын

Jane, I have cried through this video. My deepest condolences to you on the loss of your beloved husband. It's very clear how much you loved him and you were very good to him. I too lost my husband 8 months ago. Like you, I left my family home at 20 years to marry him, 44 years ago. He had been quite sick in the last months and I looked after him. I'm struggling too and cry every day. I miss him so much. I understand your huge loss xx Please look after yourself and take each day slowly. Concentrate on your creativity, it will help you on this very difficult road. You have an amazing talent and give so much joy to us sewers. Take care ❤️

@rutha.875 Жыл бұрын

My prayers are with you Jayne. Sorry for the lost of your husband. I too lost my husband 8 years ago to pancreatic cancer he was 49 years old. Just stay busy and always remember that he will always live in your heart . Stay strong and God bless always 🙏

@nikkipage9132 8 ай бұрын

Over two years a widow. And your words are my story still. I was left with very little to my name. God has had my back.❤

@joysbaking 11 ай бұрын

I just found your channel and I’m so sorry for your loss. If you can find a group of women that have things in common it will help with the grief. But mostly it’s just one day at a time ! Our church has a group of widows that support each other. The go out to eat and help take care of each other and support each other when your having a bad day. Praying for you and peace and comfort. Everyone has to find their own path in grief. I wish you peace.

@teresawalker7279 11 ай бұрын

I lost my husband 13 yrs ago. I went to a very dark place which took me a few years to come out of. My children were my healing and I found sewing to be my new life. The pain of losing someone never goes away but it will ease up as time goes by and you find who you are and what direction you are going. I've seen some of your designs and you have a gift, John would want you to keep going. My prayers are with you.

@SewLikeDotty Жыл бұрын

I’m sure that wasn’t easy but I think John would be very proud of you. Geordie will keep you busy too. Sending love and the biggest of hugs x

@fluffydog9356 11 ай бұрын

So very sorry! Prayers and hugs to you and yours! God Bless and protect you and your family! ❤

@TheDressmakersCloset 11 ай бұрын

Thank you so much!

@dr.christopherjohnson4840 11 ай бұрын

@freeandfabulous4310 11 ай бұрын

I'm so sorry. Grief is torture. Praying for your peace and for your children.

@MyDaisy66 Жыл бұрын

Lovely Jayne. This hurt to watch. I wish I could give you a big hug. Your grief is evident, you are broken. We all know how much you loved John. You’d light up whenever you spoke about him. Now you feel dead inside and cannot think of your future without him. There are no easy answers on how to cope with grief, but you are doing all the right things. You will get to wherever life takes you Jayne. It’s a process, a journey unknown. John has given you a lifetime of memories and 3 beautiful children. Take a day at a time and allow your self at least one thing that will make you smile. In time you will feel a little better. Say a prayer each day. Tell God how you feel and ask him to help you cope. The ancient King David said in Psalm 94:18 ‘When my anxieties overwhelmed me, you comforted and soothed me.’ Lots of love to you and your family. You are in my prayers 💗

@katewhyte6274 Жыл бұрын

Jayne, that was so brave to make this video, not naff at all. Wishing you much strength for one day at a time xx

@barbaraplummer5043 11 ай бұрын

You are right ! Everyone grieves differently! Do what you need for yourself! Be gentle with yourself!

@nevisscot7697 11 ай бұрын

Not everyone gets the chance to love and be loved like you have.cant imagine how you feel.😢

@lynneprentice4278 Жыл бұрын

Oh Jayne, grief is a hard and personal journey and only you know how hard it is. You must be feeling so devastated and so empty now. But I know that John would not want you to live your life in limbo, he would want you to live your life. Take one day at a time, no one is expecting you to ‘snap out of it’ or get over it! Take whatever time you need, work at whatever gives you a measure of comfort. I cannot imagine what you are going through but you are in my thoughts ❤️❤️ On a more practical note - check out your local U3A - they have lots of classes and interest groups you may like ❤️

@Lisamakes Жыл бұрын

Sending you lots of love, Jayne. You’re right, everyone grieves differently. It’s such a personal journey with many ups and downs. Lean into your sewing and pattern design. Any activity that bring you moments of peace - even just a few- are worth doing. Everything you’re saying reminds me so much of when my mom died in 2016. The emptiness and apathy are very familiar to me. I’m sending you a warm hug from Spain. Take good care of yourself, and please let others take care of you, too. Xo

@carolg.6838 Жыл бұрын

Very well said. Moments of peace and distraction from grief. It is not selfish. It is the way to cope. And if others want to help, let them help in a way that is not overwhelming. A nice lunch, or a walk, or bring a meal. I found it hard to eat after my dad passed away many ago. Back at work my boss took me to lunch and that was just what I needed. Pray, stay busy, don't stay isolated. So glad you are sewing and recognize that it is helping and good for you. A couple of years ago I started sewing small projects and it gave me a break from anxiety and depression. My eating was more regular too, I wasn't hungry every 2 hours. God bless you.

@shaistaali9802 11 ай бұрын

Ur beautiful cats need u, plz keep strong. Heart breaking watching. Brave lady ❤❤❤❤

@tufornumberone 11 ай бұрын

I am sorry for your loss. It sounds like a true love story of a marriage. I do know exactly what you’re going through. I lost my husband of 32 yrs totally unexpectedly on March 1st. We also have 3 kids. My husband had many friends and so do I but unlike him, I didn’t keep up with mine very well. The outreach when he died was a lot. I am sure you went through that, too. For about 6 weeks all I did was answer texts, emails, messengers, dms, thanked people for the food, the flowers, the cards, and talked to many people on the phone. We did a memorial service about 6 weeks after he died which gave me a chance to reconnect with even more people. I am really enjoying seeing my friends again. I also was the money maker so my days are full with working. I have been sewing a lot more and like you, more half assed gardening than I usually do. People shouldn’t die at 64 when you have gone through so much together. I don’t mind living alone now that I am getting used to it. One of my kids is always here, it seems, so not a lot of time to dwell on things. I joined a Handy Women FB group to learn how to do stuff around the house. More than anything, I despise the term “widow.” Nobody calls me that but I know that is now my status. Not the way it was supposed to be. Hope your pain lessens with time. Reach out if you ever want to commiserate. I am 63 and live outside NYC in Connecticut.

@deechrisman2219 Жыл бұрын

I am so sorry for your loss Jayne. I am 20 months in from my husband passing. In time, the pain becomes different, it is always there, but it is different. My husband and I were together 45 years and like you I had never been on my own. It definitely is hard to go from a we to a me but we can. I push myself to do things too, we have to, we can't just sit here. Giving you a hug and strength to carry on...

@AdamSews Жыл бұрын

Sending you hugs Jayne, nobody could overlook the amount of love you and John had for each other, grief never gets smaller we just learn to fit it into our daily life over time and make space for it xx

@rebeccamurdock7616 11 ай бұрын

So very sorry for your loss. Prayers to you and your family. GOD bless.

@5thdimension625 11 ай бұрын

I’m am so very sorry for your loss of your believe hubby. Please accept my deepest condolences. Sending prayers from the US to my Scottish friend.

@susanbates112 Жыл бұрын

So sorry for your loss. I'm glad your sewing is helping you through this awful time. You sewing and crochet patterns are lovely. I hope you figure out which way you want to go in your life. Making this video must have been so hard. Wising you all the best for the future.

@gailh3048 Жыл бұрын

I’m sorry to hear of the loss of your beloved husband, your love for him shines through. Just take a day or even hour at a time to get through these darkest days. I hope you find comfort in your family, sewing and garden as you try to adjust to life without him ❤

@juliawigger9796 11 ай бұрын

Life is you and your family, not the Internet. You grieve your way. My heart goes out to you. ❤❤❤

@Joan-mc8gm Ай бұрын

I understand what you are going through. I lost my Mom on December 31 of 2023.

@colettelee3391 Жыл бұрын

I am so sorry to hear of the loss of John. It's very hard to fill the time in the day, please be kind to yourself give yourself permmision to to grieve. Get through each day in your own way sending hugs and prayers ❤️

@cherylhoulton3719 Жыл бұрын

Oh Jayne, your words about your beloved John are so beautiful. Just take one day at a time don't think about next 30 years. Your doing very positive things. Sending healing thoughts to you.

@GrammaPatriot 11 ай бұрын

I’m so sorry for the loss of your dear husband! What a beautiful marriage the two of you had. God bless and comfort you and your family. 🙏🏻❤️🙏🏻

@ticketyboo1215 11 ай бұрын

Bless your heart Sweetie. He will always be with you … always. Sending a big hug and lots of love 🥰

@Joolzie76 11 ай бұрын

I'm so sorry for your loss. I think he would be very proud of you being brave enough to share this will your followers x

@dr.christopherjohnson4840 11 ай бұрын

@pamelafreeman4548 Жыл бұрын

I was like you. Married and never lived alone. My husband passed 10 years ago. I was 52 and he was 55. You will be in my prayers. Staying busy helps.❤

@saraborisch5343 11 ай бұрын

You are very brave to go before a camera and lay yourself out as you did.Grief is a very personal and an individual thing.You are correct in that you just have to get up and get yourself through each day. It hits at odd times.You are in my prayers! OX sara