The History of the World According to 'Ancient Aliens'

[@AlternateHistoryHub]

Special thanks to Knowing Better for helping out with his vast alien knowledge. kzbin.info/www/bejne/roGxcmyIodWemqs

[@remenir97]

Love that Jazz music.

[@oceanview5691]

Anybody want to tell me what's with Ancient Aliens trending?🤔🤔🧐🧐

[@stevenandersen6989]

Hey Cody, I dare you to do The nations of the world song, but it's all the nations that killed the Byzantines

[@stevenandersen6989]

But Cody, do you got Tiny Goblins?

[@spaceguy9326]

Who taught the aliens.

[@johnkrappweis7367]

I am a believer in the words of Carl Sagan in the “Cosmos” tv series. “It is an insult to the intelligence of our ancestors to think they were too DUMB to figure stuff out.”

[@nicholasgeere5125]

Its no more stupid than the shit they teach you in sunday school

[@rag4824]

@@nicholasgeere5125 r/atheism

[@nicholasgeere5125]

@@rag4824 i guess i had that one comming but my point still stands

[@patrickdavies9790]

@@nicholasgeere5125 *tips fedora*

[@HarshDude126]

@@patrickdavies9790 There is no god.

[@josemaria8177]

Ancient Aliens is one of those shows that get progressively more insane with each episode, while being really repetitive and retreading the same material over and over again

[@theawkwardskeleton6608]

Also the implied racism that all civilizations that weren’t European all their works and inventions weren’t created by them, but by a “superior being”.

[@RomanBelisarius]

@@theawkwardskeleton6608 ??? Even Europeans were very much handheld from what Cody seems to explain here. Anything of classical greece and Rome seemed to come or be "under guidance" of aliens.

[@charlieskywalker7062]

@@RomanBelisarius they mention it, but the focus is INCREDIBLY skewed. There’s a huge focus on non Europeans having no way of doing anything without aliens.

[@pickledblowfish6178]

@@theawkwardskeleton6608 not really. Romans, Greeks, nazis, america, Stonehenge, nasa, all aliens. Not everything is racist homie.

[@theawkwardskeleton6608]

I’m referring to the origins of the these conspiracies; the majority of them were used in the very beginning to discredit many of the people’s creations here in the Americas, the best example being who was first credited to building the Mounds of the Mississippi River.

[@Whimsu]

This is a bold show for bold men

[@SA71104]

Agreed

[@pyeitme508]

Early

[@crusaderiii477]

I watch all episodes

[@Oskar_464]

Bald men*

[@thegoldenpyro]

Time travel

[@iamheavyweaponsguy2831]

Love how season 1 is all fine and dandy, just theories and speculation. Then in season 2 they say that King Arthur pulled an high tech alien weapon from a large stone with the help of an alien in a lake.

[@andreamunoz6088]

My favourite is George Washington being taught war tactics by aliens to win the revolutionary war

[@asparagusoffice]

suddenly I understood why the show had 16 seasons

[@zacharyrose4120]

@@andreamunoz6088 This one is extra wacky since all the important victories in the Revolution were fought conventionally. Steuben teaching euro tactics is the reason the Continentals could actually fight.

[@Circurose]

Typical Asssassin's Creed plotline.

[@Zanemob]

@@CircuroseI still laugh at Assassins Creed… I bet we’ll have Space Trooper Assassins next. Assassins Creed: War Stars

[@wuhzaoski4081]

"I sat down and watched every episode..." Mad respect. The sacrifices youtubers make for content...

[@wizard680]

And still ends up demonitized

[@oldmanlogan9616]

@@wizard680 is it a coincidence demonetized is written the same way as demon??? I dont think so

[@aitormentaBv]

@@oldmanlogan9616 ALIENS!

[@KaiSan3]

this much hours of watching the series althistoryhub did is what proves that, in the end, the ancient aliens still claim human sacrifice until today... and they don't need pyramids to take people's blood away from them

[@ANYA.RIZALI]

meow meow

[@Nodeaa]

"King Arthur, who was a real, human being, not only was able to pull the sword from the stone because of alien biometric technology..." has got to be one of the funniest lines I've heard in a minute.

[@baird5682]

I would watch that movie.

[@julianaguilera998]

That whole statement about Arthur makes him boring.😒

[@sinksalesman1747]

Imagine if he had burnt his hands That'd be a different story lmao

[@queeny5613]

Yep

[@jah7514]

Ok so, why were men, bigger and stronger than Authur, wasn't able to pull the sword from the stone? It doesn't have to be true but it's a decent explanation.. this place was way more advanced than the given authority, leads us to believe.

[@Shaso-xv3tw]

“Who watches this crap?” Me watching ancient aliens and taking notes for my fantasy world building.

[@alishermukhametkali9230]

For the Greater Good, right? Tau'Va

[@ahardworker2154]

@Night Falcon Yes inquisitor this guy here

[@forickgrimaldus8301]

@@alishermukhametkali9230 funny that to the Imperium there were Aliens in their Ancient past..... Though its in 20,000 AD which is very very Old for 40,000 AD

[@FirstOHNameOfficial]

Tau’va!!!

[@slightlyistorical1776]

Your pfp says it all

[@nicovaldez9482]

An excerpt from Ancient Aliens season 54: “It was the aliens that contacted Lin Manuel Miranda to give him the idea of Hamilton”

[@Tommynotit]

Hahaha!

[@Tea_laBlue]

BLESS OUR ALIEN OVERLORDS FOR HAMILTON!!!

[@shalashaska5851]

Truly the worst aliens.

[@Elyseon]

What about Shakespeare?

[@yeetme3940]

@@Elyseonnah, he’s from England so he gets to keep credit for his attributed accomplishments 🙃

[@NamelessGamer29]

Cody managed to watch every AncientAliens episode and remain sane. He must be an alien.

[@PandemoniumMeltDown]

Indeed

[@VetusPupa]

Nah, it's hard to watch even for me, therefore he's a god

[@rare80]

I dunno about that, Tyler is DEFINITELY an alien, though.

[@Becka_Harper]

...bold of you to think that he was ever sane.

[@superpumpkin1065]

Lol

[@N0TYALC]

Imagine that this show just keeps running for hundreds of years. Then thousands of years. Empires rise and fall, languages mutate, merge, split, and die. Episode 17,846 suggests that a mysterious broadcast called “ancient aliens” from the early 21st century American Republic is far too unorthodox and ahead of its time to have been created by mere humans. Cue narrator voice: *Is it possible that this program’s bold claims were inspired by an extraterrestrial insight?*

[@Bootyeatter6969]

the government: stay right fucken there

[@mexalcorta]

“Ancient astronaut theorists say yes”

[@LegendarySparantus]

" Yes it is "

[@Travybear1989]

@Communist Detective Naruto Uzumaki 2186 actually. This message brought to you by The Future™

[@Travybear1989]

@Communist Detective Naruto Uzumaki NO WAY!!!!!!!!!!!!?!??????!!??!?!!111

[@dorianlofton9240]

I’m not going to lie to you, when I was 10 ancient aliens used to have me stomped. I would think to myself “Yo, that’s a really good point.”

[@Snp2024]

Same but at 14

[@wizard680]

Same thing happen to me to. I remember watching the show at my aunts place and how the aliens watched Columbus sail the ocean blue.

[@hobihope2981]

Dude theres one episode where a pyramid has an impossibly perfectly fit grave inside that apparently had no way for humans to put it in and like.... I got a physics degree, yet I still think about it to this day.

[@dorianlofton9240]

@@hobihope2981 It’s things like that they have people stomped, but tbh we have to remember it wasn’t regular people building these structures. It was highly trained engineers of that time period. Ofc the average Egyptian wouldn’t know how to design that, that’s like saying the average American knows the logistics of space travel.

[@Web720]

Same but in High School. I gobbled up a lot of that stuff in my Middle-High school days.

[@digisalamander2726]

What I like to picture ancient humans interactions with aliens be like. Humans: build pyramids Aliens: see pyramids and lands on earth Aliens to humans: “ you guys built those structures “ Humans: “ yes we did. With our barehands “ Aliens: “ that is impressive.” Humans: “ thanks “ Aliens: leave earth The end

[@Thefrogbread]

Real

[@MrChickennugget360]

i prefer the Futurama version where they aliens meet the Egyptians and develop their culture from them. They even built their spaceships to be like pyramids. "we Traveled to earth and learned my things from the Egyptians"

[@aidanbarnes4290]

I view it has ancient humans just saw strange light formations and that inspired their religions

[@concept5631]

​That's actually a pretty cool spin on ancient aliens. @@MrChickennugget360

[@GabrielleTollerson]

love this!

[@Tragedous]

I remember my school showing episodes of this show to teach us to be critical of sources when researching since it showed that people can explain pure nonsense enough to sound convincing to some

[@celiapyburn5858]

That’s a smart teacher. 11 year old me definitely bought into Ancient Aliens

[@iankearns774]

Including your teachers.

[@DonVigaDeFierro]

Wikipedia.

[@ADHDWithAMic]

Aliens!

[@shadowsovereign4948]

That’s a way better teaching method than just saying, don’t trust Wikipedia. Props to your teacher

[@thesaurusakasickakatheomc7688]

Never has there been a better example of "I did it so you don't have to". Truly a Herculean task.

[@johnfraire6931]

A _Herculean_ task... you mean the half *alien* Heracles of Hellenistic stories? COulD that Mean that COdy of ALternate HIStory is ACTUALLY half AlIen?/??//?

[@thesaurusakasickakatheomc7688]

@@johnfraire6931 I don't say this often, but you might be having too much fun...

[@sevencatsinasuit]

If Aliens taught us. Who taught the Aliens? I NEED a history channel series about the double Aliens.

[@GarfieldnSonic]

Ayo let this man cook

[@tk-5268]

Ancienter alients

[@flyboymb]

Future humans taught the aliens.

[@A-V01D]

And also a series about the triple aliens

[@guiltygearalonecompl]

Time traveling future humans. They go back and tech the aliens, but they intentionally teach them stupid shit just to flex on them

[@robertbrown3064]

I met Giorgio Tsoukalos once at a frat party in Raleigh, NC. Dude wandered in the front door, clearly already drunk, and was so charming and entertaining that no one seemed to mind when he proceeded to help himself to our booze, tell a few stories about visiting Egypt, then wandered out the door again like a ship setting sail into the night. Was a surreal 20 minutes, lmao.

[@antenna_prolly]

did he say aliens stole the booze

[@robertbrown3064]

@@antenna_prolly I'm still not convinced they didn't!

[@John_on_the_mountain]

Honestly i bet he would be a lot of fun to hang out with lol

[@marksmith5770]

Omfg I missed read Raleigh as R’Lyeh cool cool cool mystical sunken city just chilling inconspicuously in North Carolina

[@sillylittleowlguy2392]

@@marksmith5770 dude I fucking wish

[@woltersworld]

Every single episode??!?!?!? Oh man... dang... you need some serious de-tox tea or something. Wow...

[@monad_tcp]

Dihidrogen monoxide works great !

[@RIXRADvidz]

Celestial Seasons Tension Tamer

[@AndyMcCavish]

I'm sure the aliens must have a device that could wipe this his memory?

[@oumardiop1]

@@monad_tcp no i dont eat or drink any chemicals 🤬🙄😳🥵

[@xenontesla122]

If I did that, I don't think I'd be able to have coherent thoughts anymore, let alone write a script on what I saw!

[@bryanmanuelbaes7871]

I still vividly remember watching an episode where they speculated that Steve Jobs was given a telepathic message from aliens guiding him to the creation of Apple.

[@ejazshaikh2863]

What Really?😂😂

[@justmazen3168]

This fucking show is on crack lmfaoo

[@InfernosReaper]

Gotta love these theories that demonstrate how absolutely no effort went into researching history for their creation, because all Jobs ever really did was have engineers improve on existing ideas. It's not like he was actually engineering anything himself, not even the original Apple computers. That was his friend, not him.

[@uncannyvalley2350]

Aryan propaganda, posing as education, on primetime TV

[@killian9314]

Same but it was with Einstein

[@maglor8157]

I HATE it when people say that someone from ancient times was dumber than us modern people. They just had a lower level of Tech to work with. And they were very smart using that Tech.

[@jjt171]

modern humans and "ancient" humans are pretty much biologically identical.

[@jagdawgii929]

@@jjt171 we've been anatomically modern for 1 million years

[@thermusaquaticusPCR]

I mean on average they definitely were. Diseases and malnutrition were probably knocking a ton off of the average IQ. Look up the Flynn effect. IQs have increased substantially in just the last 100 years.

[@donpollo3154]

@@thermusaquaticusPCR that's true, but that doesn't mean they were stupid, and they were definitely very intelligent with what they had

[@Comkill117]

“They we’re so dumb with how they invented the original technology that over centuries of improvement lead to what we have today.” Yeah I agree, I never really got that idea either.

[@cjtherandomizer7638]

A dangerous drinking game for this show is taking a shot every time the narrator asks some random question followed up by “according to ancient astronaut theorist, the answer is yes”. You’d be in the hospital by two episodes.

[@NayrAnur]

Or when the narrator says "Is it possible..." or "otherworldly."

[@trolly4233]

Props to these dudes for somehow finding a way to link every aspect of human history to alien visitation. That’s some insane story writing.

[@tanybrachid]

Insane as in it requires skill and dedication? Or insane as in literally insane?

[@the_occasional1764]

@@tanybrachid Yes.

[@sheeshabedin1379]

Shakespeare writings ultra pro+

[@Ihatechoosingnames242]

@@sheeshabedin1379 I mean shakesspear was an Alien or atleast an Alien told hin what to write

[@xra_fan01]

Did the aliens tell you to write this comment? Are you in the know???

[@Kemot300]

"The aliens did everything" apparently except getting rid of the people that are doing 'Ancient Aliens' to shut them up about telling all their secrets.

[@QTheRabbit]

I know this comment was a joke, but this is what really bugs me about a lot of conspiracy theories. "The only people who know the truth are me and those who watch this web series/follow this website that knows exactly what's going on! The people who caused [Insert Conspiracy Theory] just want you to think it actually happened because you're dumb!" If they had the power to cause said thing to happen, wouldn't they also have the power to just take down whatever it is that you found out this information from and thus keep people from finding out the truth? Like, I see so many people showing random-ass websites as "proof" of outlandish claims for things done by world governments or the Illuminati or some shit, and yet they don't stop and think that these governments/groups definitely would have the power to just remove those sites or bury that information or even just have these dudes taken out so random people can't find out "the truth" about what they're doing.

[@ambeegaming76]

The best way to make someone not believe something is to make it a joke. Only people with open minds give any of this a second thought no need to shut them up.

[@juanmanuelpenaloza9264]

Aztecs building pyramids: Go help the Jews, Sr Aliens. We got this.

[@slyseal2091]

@@QTheRabbit The reversed logic also works, "how and why would a government be expected to fake a moon program if it can't even stop some sorry sod from telling everyone that it's faked". Logistics truly is the red revenger of rational thinking.

[@MrlspPrt]

@@QTheRabbit you saw too much X-Files (I'm doing it just now 😂😂😂😂) when this could be as simple as explaining it as some form of "Cassandra of Troy" (daughter of Priam who could see the future, but was cursed so nobody believed her).

[@_MaximumVoltage]

This guy really sat there and watched the entirety of Ancient Aliens for our sake. Give this man a medal and a very good therapist

[@liberalrationalist8905]

Sometimes I watch the show.....only because everything else is even dumber. You know, the evangelical TV programs begging for your money. Pat Robertson always looks like he's been constipated for two weeks and is attempting a bowel movement on camera.

[@slyskitzo]

I love the show it’s actually fascinating and to be fair there not claiming anything officially there just asking questions and proposing answers to those questions

[@miguelmontenegro3520]

@@slyskitzo They just talk about how all of our acomplishments were made by aliens... as a pro-human activist, I can't stand such treachery. *We are gonna make a planetary shield, and the Aliens are going to pay for it*

[@stijnvdv2]

Ancient astronaut theorists say yes: he's an extraterrestrial coming from outta space with superhuman capabilities to watch all episodes of total gibberish.

[@stijnvdv2]

@@liberalrationalist8905 Pretty much why I don't watch cable tv here. News and talkshows are radical left, lying most of the time with political motivations and playing Neo-communist victimhood Paralympics yet claim to be 'objective' XD, entertainment shows seem to be a total rip off from Idols for almost 25 years now, like who the fuck is still watching that stuff? Or cooking with I don't give a shit. Movies are unwatchable due to the sheer amount of ads and commercial breaks, and even the commercials themselves.... if I gotta hear one more politically motivated 'durability/sustainability/climate change' bullshit I'm gonna fucking puke!

[@Lightman0359]

The Bigfoot episode is the best for their mental gymnastics. At various points they say bigfoot is [somehow at the same time]: -An Alien spy, waiting for humans to leave so bigfoot can inherit the earth -an alien fugitive or criminal, like the Earth is some form of prison colony -the creature aliens hybridised with to make humans -a hyprid of human and alien.

[@brockschannel3927]

Yeah,I don't really like that episode.

[@baby.nay.]

@@brockschannel3927haha yea there wrre always certain episodes that I was like , nah I can’t fall asleep to this one 😂

[@jackthaddeus314]

hypot.

[@tristanskywalker1998]

In an alternate universe, everything in this show actually happened, and our world's real-life history is the conspiracies of anti-alien conspiracy theorists, with a show on History Channel called, "Ancient Humans".

[@patrickblanchette4337]

Hmmm...... Sounds like a really great show in our reality on CuriosityStream called ‘Ancient Engineering’ that you should check out 😉.

[@johnjohnson-wg7jv]

In an even more slightly different universe ancient humanity actually did accomplish all they were said to have, but the ancient aliens theory is commonly believed to be what happened.

[@ks6848]

oh. god. daaamn

[@scottcallahan5029]

Ok.... That would be hilarious

[@neo-didact9285]

Silly conspiracy nut, stop trying to add humans into the history of development given to us by our alien overlords. ALL HAIL LORD XENU, GIVER OF THEATANS!!!

[@belgebelgravia100]

The Ancient Aliens explanation for how humanity was created is genuinely word-for-word the plot to the first 3 Assassin's Creed games.

[@0g0mogosepikworld31]

Only question remaining: who copied who?

[@zetanone7211]

@@0g0mogosepikworld31 the first assassins creed game was released in 2007, and the first episode of ancient aliens was aired in 2009. Do with that what you will.

[@neoanimegirl]

@@zetanone7211 don't forget these ideas have been around way longer than AC & AA. Lol so those "scientists" had these encounters when they were much younger

[@nicbahtin4774]

@@zetanone7211 Yea but only in AC 2 we got to the ones that came before

[@belgebelgravia100]

Was Ubisoft actually contacted by higher dimensional extraterrestrials that commanded them to write down their teachings, in the form of a video game, to spread their message? No.

[@illsaveus]

Season 1000: Did ancient aliens first create season 1 of ancient aliens in order to tell us about ancient aliens?

[@jimboscooter432]

Way to spoil season 1000 for me 😒

[@tomassmith1519]

Plot Twist: The people on this show are aliens

[@thedeerguy7579]

Ancient astronaut theorists say yes!

[@Justatransgal23]

“And the answer is a potential yes”

[@lostnorbt]

The world was made by aliens, the greatest hits were done by aliens and so was this show

[@Kurai_69420]

I survived the 2012 alien apocalypse and all I got was a lousy T-shirt

[@thatguy9088]

Me: "Man, who would write a show like Ancient Aliens?" Ancient Aliens: "Aliens." Me: "OF COURSE!"

[@snekkoheckko4466]

the show is so crazy to make us believe it's all fake

[@redblaze8700]

That explains a lot. Either the aliens wants to teach us that they’re real, or they want to keep us dumb by planting the seed on the idea that we couldn’t do anything on our own.

[@ProjektTaku]

@@redblaze8700 or aliens just want to troll humans and say they made them.

[@ibraahemnabeel]

truth hiding in plain sight !

[@dodgsonwevegotdodgsonhere9970]

I think we're just a couple episodes away from "Could it be possible that the advent of the Iraq war was influenced by an extraterrestrial presence? Ancient astronaut theorists say yes"

[@gingeranagram2467]

They have one on the Civil war. -_-

[@Bakecrusto]

Pretty sure one of their episodes talks about Iraq war happening because Americans discovered that there's Nebuchadnezzar's Stargate there, and they learned about it from aliens, because the aliens need humans to recover it. Or something.

[@Dan_Ben_Michael]

“Sarajevo 1914: Archduke Franz Ferdinand heir to the Austro-Hungarian Emperor was assassinated alongside his wife Archduchess Sophie, igniting the powder keg that was the many alliances drawing the entire globe into war. Was the assassin an extraterrestrial agent hellbent on the destruction of mankind? Ancient alien theorists say…. “why the fuck not? It’s as good as any other bullshit theory we promote on this piece of garbage tv show that the History Channel should be embarrassed for broadcasting!”

[@sirshotty7689]

Don’t forget that time the ancient aliens took out a 2 trillion dollar loan from the pentagon.

[@hhgff778]

Yeah, they actually have an episode about the hot spots around the world and apparently aliens use their tech to make people there extremely violent so they would destroy all evidence of them being here or something lmao.

[@-caesarian-6078]

I can’t imagine someone so sad and pessimistic to genuinely believe that every single human accomplishment was just handed to us by bored aliens.

[@Nostripe361]

The weirdest part to me is that this theory is so complicated and crazy that I seriously can’t figure out what’s E.T. and Yoda’s end game here. What do they gain from helping Nazi’s but still letting them lose the war? The only way this theory makes sense is if you go with the idea that our world/universe is a civ game with more mods than a broken Bethesda game.

[@liborkozak8938]

@@Nostripe361 It just works Btw any into about Todd being alien?

[@alw2839]

@@liborkozak8938 Proof he is actually a Godd Howard

[@Forestdude9000]

I can get behind Christianity, but this is insane. It's just Christianity with extra steps. Like, Christianity but for atheists.

[@ahappylictor3214]

Now that I think about it, how do we know all human aren't actually aliens ourselves and we just forgot about it?

[@pvt.gaminggummybear6337]

This show is the epitome of “Citation Needed”

[@fredrickvontater5433]

Plot twist: ancient aliens is really a satire and they have just kept the joke up for all this time

[@swausgebouwen143]

That's what i thought when i saw JUST HOW MANY people they had ti interview on ancient aliens. Shocking

[@Dreagostini]

@Robin The God - Fake ASMR Is Being Stupid At nighttime it's colder than outside.

[@Dreagostini]

@Robin The God - Fake ASMR Is Being Stupid You just proofed the neccessary context. Ty for that.

[@Sorain1]

Started as a joke, but no one caught on early and they were making money... so they just keep going.

[@angrytrees7519]

Don't we all wish this was so.

[@Dancin_Time]

Ancient Aliens: Talks about religions being actually created by Aliens. Also Ancient Aliens: Ignores the implications of rebellion against and death of the Gods in the Titanomachia, Gigantomachia, Ragnarok, Apophis devouring the sun, Gilgamesh and Enkidu, and etc etc.

[@legojay14]

Thats how they make new episodes. Going back to the beginning and covering other parts of the mythologies

[@ohdontmindme4241]

@The Fabulous Eagle this, there were skills a mere 50 years ago that are now lost to our knowledge. Whose to says the sands of time haven’t distorted the history we know and buried some of it. God forbid we aren’t the smartest we’ve ever been

[@joeyjojoshabadoo2508]

What im getting here Is, even if there were ancient aliens we already defeated the bastards

[@Hrvatski_vojnik]

Judgement day

[@someguy3766]

They will probably make an episode in the future about the death of the gods actually being a human rebellion against their alien masters where they killed the aliens on Earth and that's why aliens hide from us now or something. "Did humans KILL their alien rulers in ancient Babylon??" :P

[@antonydandrea]

I love how they taught us how to build stone structures instead of how to harness the power of electricity. It only took, like 100 years to get from steampower to computer circuits, so they could have easily have done it.

[@raycom201]

I’m guessing aliens like slows down long grinds

[@Godzilla00X]

That's like playing the Sims on easy mode. Don't you want a challenge?

[@badreality2]

But why would they? Does your country willingly teach third world countries how to use high technology? If not, why? If so, does your country teach these tribes EVERY science, or just the subjects they think the populace can handle?

[@danielflanard8274]

@@badreality2 Most first world countries are busy enriching their own people, or struggling and failing to. In this fictional reality, the aliens created humans as a subservient species, so what harm would there be in granting them some minor innovations.

[@antonydandrea]

@@badreality2 yes. It's well documented what countries do for eachother and what medicines and technology are now across the world

[@jensphiliphohmann1876]

I sometimes suspect that the ancient aliens idea is related to the ancient "Aryans" idea - I don't refer to the actual Aryans who once invaded Persia and India but to the alleged superhumans who supposedly founded Atlantis and, after Atlantis vanished, spread into rather primitive civilizations and made them great. A favourite "theory" of Heinrich Himmler.

[@mesadrums375]

*2000 years from now* “Iron man, Thor, captain America…. They were all real and brought down from the heavens.”

[@SparkingEX]

"And the most powerful of them all, Squirrel Girl" Her or Deadpool, pick your poison

[@nickwhyman4815]

Did the serum that created America’s Captain come from an advanced extraterrestrial race?

[@merlenclownshuffles]

It came down tonthe grat battle of "Tha nose".

[@kingmac6638]

@@SparkingEX the most powerful of them all, scarlet witch

[@thefunnymofo7857]

@@kingmac6638 Squirrel girl will beat Scarlet Witch.

[@lazarussolomon3541]

I love how in one episode they tried to claim that George Washington actually meet aliens when he meet with the Native American tribes. Because gasp he actually learned useful information form these tribes

[@Christopher_TG]

Which again demonstrates my other comment that racism is a fundamental component of this nonsense.

[@lazarussolomon3541]

@@Christopher_TG kinda. It's not like they do say that the Europeans weren't influenced by aliens when they made their great achievements. I recall the show said Socrates was influenced by aliens or was an alien when he made Philosophy. But I do agree that it does seem to play up how the achievements of none European ones we're influences to a ridiculous degree. But if I had to give a benefit of the doubt it could be because most great achievements that happened in Africa where when humanity was Very young.

[@spetterman2916]

@@Christopher_TG Definitely! Even the guy he kept going back to was like how could these civilisations know astronomy and scientific things like the Europeans. I'm like wait wtf are you just being racist LOL

[@Christopher_TG]

@@spetterman2916 Not just high level knowledge, but also accompishments. The idea that nonwhite civilizations like the Egyptians, Maya, Ghana, Mali, Ethiopia, and the Mesopotamians could have built incredible wonders of ancient engineering is so unfathomable to white Europeans/Americans that it must've been some kind of supernatural intervention. It's just so blatant.

[@nutsbroker5687]

@@Christopher_TG i mean why would they claim et build the stonehenge or helped the nazis ? They would have just said Euros were smarter than Egyptians and the nazis were the best then ?

[@michaelmoser7497]

I’d never thought that a show could be insulting to the human race but here we are. Ancient Aliens is 16 seasons of saying “humans are dumb, aliens did everything.”

[@vladprus4019]

Plot twist: it was made by the actual aliens to breed the ground for alien supremacist on Earth waiting for the day the aliens would reveal themselves.

[@croakaly95]

​@@vladprus4019:o

[@TheRealBillix]

Many religions are pretty similar and some even more illogical

[@chumon1992]

Its pretty akin to the idea that all evil is human born and god just tries to save us from ourselves by vaguely teaching us parental like lessons with the use of capital punishment and reward tactics.

[@LordOfTheFatties]

They literally suggest that ancient humans couldn't possibly have figured out how to make...buildings.

[@viscountrainbows2857]

"Aliens made everything." "Even this show?" ".... HE KNOWS TOO MUCH."

[@Tetris521]

This is actually some dope ass lore. They could have written endless fantasy books and create a series that i would be heavily invested in.

[@sabbathjackal]

someone did. its called stargate

[@xcape4734]

Is that what Stargate is about damn I remember getting mad as a kid when it would come on cuz it wasn't cartoons

[@chironthefloof2920]

the thing is, the dudes that run the show actually believe this shit

[@nicduusify]

It reminds me of the lore in Assassin's Creed

[@Rc-a322]

its called assassins creed

[@yolocervantes3510]

Can we just salute this great soldier for watching all 200 episodes and then summarizing it all so that no one else must endure the same suffering he went through. This man has my utmost respect.

[@TactaGhoul]

And in the end, all there is to say about the show is unironically "aliens did everything," just like the memes. What a waste of time that must have been...

[@DzinkyDzink]

I somehow think he just read the wiki and then watched the relevant extracts on youtube.

[@itz_ex0_279]

Cody went crazy for our sins.

[@navyseal1689]

Ikr, this show is pain in the ass to watch

[@98erics]

I must admit, I'll watch an episode or two just for laughs. Eventually I come down and realize it stinks and change the channel.

[@OfficialLagada]

My favorite line of this show is: "Ancient Astronaut Theorists, say YES."

[@todd7383]

At this point its like a catchphrase

[@uncannyvalley2350]

Confirmation bias er, confirmed?

[@quintusfabiusmaximus8700]

YES!

[@noelobrien4377]

They did change it over time

[@niteowl9491]

"People who fundamentally agree, agree."

[@JayFife]

I literally face palmed at the “Grim Reaper “ alien claim.

[@vtipoman]

This sounds like a sci-fi expanded universe where every entry was written by a different person

[@Russocass]

Isn't the Bible basically that?

[@chfrqn4dl]

@@Russocass lmfao

[@TJDious]

What do you mean "sounds like?"

[@xenontesla122]

You're basically describing the SCP Foundation, except SCP is much more coherent.

[@laurensahanna5826]

@@xenontesla122 which is honestly impressive, considering canon in the SCP universe is basically non existent

[@drkushajagadeesh6347]

"And that's when the ancient astronaut theorists realized, the aliens were inside them the whole time." *roll credits*

[@jesseparra1988]

maybe the aliens are the friends we made along our journey

[@berto2125]

They got amnesia. And it turns out. They were the aliens the whole time

[@sylph8005]

*chestbursters emerge*

[@nelsonr1241]

He did a backflip, snapped the aliens neck and saved the day!

[@Flesh_Wizard]

I've seen some fanart like that🤢

[@lakobause]

"The Black Plague was engineered by an extraterrestrial we know as the Grim Reaper." I laughed so hard to keep my brain from melting out of my ears.

[@Leto965]

Because things like symbolism don't exist

[@Marx9728]

@@Leto965 I hate to be that person but.... *exist.

[@defalttheloner]

Grim Reaper will be my new rpg char in a future setting

[@johnjamescapel3489]

O thought it was engineered by the rat king. Or it's spread by splinter whe he forgot to wear a sheath , with April oniel

[@Leto965]

@@Marx9728 thanks. English is not my native language so sometimes I make mistakes like this

[@TheKitsuneOnihane]

It's been 3 years and id still like to say thank you for your sacrifice

[@mildlydazed9608]

I think he’s due to make a follow-up with the more recent episodes. Not because I believe in them but because this video is hilarious and I want more

[@purplehaze2358]

If they’re after gold, why go to a planet that arguably has very little of it compared to something as simple to harvest it from as the asteroid belts or uninhabited bodies in our solar system? Let alone ANY other solar system, for that matter.

[@EmmaSpAce111]

Guess they know how to travel through space and build pyramids but not how to mine asteroids 🤷‍♀️😆

[@bane2201]

Exactly! It'd be easier - and FAR faster - to haul some asteroids back to their solar system than make a slave species to mine the Earth. Also, why is it gold specifically? I don't know what elements would go in alien tech, but gold is very unreactive. Unless unreactive elements are valuable for aliens, I don't know why they'd care about gold more than, idk, tellurium.

[@wildfire9280]

@@EmmaSpAce111 they were waiting for us to develop that technology for them

[@aliceiscalling]

Because how else would they mess with organisms for funsies?

[@zzerxes]

There’s only a little left because they took it all, duuuuuhhhh!

[@LibertyJefferson]

"I'm not saying it was aliens... But, it was aliens..." - The Internet

[@stijnvdv2]

@@busimagen believe it or not, Giorgio Tsoukalos with hair as if he stuck his fingers in the electrical socket actually has a stunning and beautiful wife.

[@youngnutsack17]

If anyone can explain how rock structures were cut using some sort of 4D technology in the Andes then ill stop believing, my job is to cut shit with really expensive machinery, nothing in the world can cut 4D notches on one single 10ton rock slab. Right now it’s impossible to humans.

[@cteal2018]

@@youngnutsack17 4d...as in time traveling rock saws?

[@distane8376]

Ancient Aliens is the professional wrestling of history.

[@jennarallyspeaking]

cant top this

[@GuilainMusic]

ahahahaah

[@jonplaud]

Great analogy!

[@AlphaMartin]

Aliens taking credit for the Pyramids of Giza = The Montreal Screwjob

[@johnr8007]

Wrestling is real, god dammit! =*(

[@samhescott348]

I’m thoroughly convinced there’s a direct correlation between this show’s viewership and weed legalization

[@gabrielhorn8572]

Not even close, the show is loved by idiots that fully believe conspiracy nonsense without seeing any evidence and other BS that provide easy answers. Lots of old folk and religious sheeple type. Maybe some of the stoners but that's not the majority demographic.

[@sroofikaden2355]

“Because Noah was half alien” how can you just say that like, so casually

[@rogerclarke4760]

Kuz Jesus christ was a dinosaur riding zombie killing reptilian alien platapus

[@Enchie]

It took many takes and much alcohol.

[@sergiowinter5383]

Still he just made a common big boat instead of a spaceship, not very alien.

[@gst013]

That's about the least of the weirdness on that show 😅

[@Bruh-hq1hx]

@@sergiowinter5383 but what if alien spaceships look like big boats?

[@DanBoergeJensen]

I actually met one of these people at the Nasca lines in Peru when I was backpacking through South America in 2009. He was really exited to tell us about all of his publications on ancient aliens. We had fun hearing what he had to say and then laughing when he was out of ear shot. We saw him again in an Inca museum a few days later, where he was filming a "documentary". We had just recieved a guided tour where we learned how the ancient Incas tied planks of wood to infants' heads to give them that particular head shape. It was really quite interesting. Then we saw the ancient aliens guy filming his documentary, talking about how the special head shapes might be evidence that the Incas interbred with aliens, and that they had "better psycic abilities". Whatever the hell that means. So we have two competing explanations: planks of wood or interbreeding with space aliens. I know whch one I find more likely.

[@connorkiraly4934]

Aliens obviously

[@levitschetter5288]

Science defines the limitations for being the same species their inability to breed, so if they could breed their not aliens their the same species lol. This makes about as much sense as flat earthers or nasa faked the moon landing

[@Bossnnot]

Whos to say the planks of wood weren't just the excuse the aliens gave us after they bred and brainwashed us

[@Slaking_]

Obviously the aliens, skulls are too thick we all know the wood would just break. My skull is anyway.

[@romulus2473]

@@levitschetter5288 Actually, that's not entirely true. Biology is actually really hard to define, clear-cut and species are in some ways an arbitrary classification. Reproduction is a big indicator, but it's not a certainty or a perfect method to define a species. It's this variation and arbitrary-ness that causes taxons to be constantly shifted around as more information is obtained.

[@zachmcnamara4376]

"So everyone knows the plan? We're gonna dump giant letter T's into the Boston Harbor just to stick it to the British." "oooooh....not tea?" "No not tea, why would we waste something that expen-oh god, please tell me you guys didn't dump ACTUAL tea in the harbor" ".....would you look at the time? I gotta go, bye!"

[@nate7LP_my_dog_found_the_knife]

You monster$, what have you done.

[@Zman44444]

“Why did you throw tea into the harbor guys.. I mean. The letter T, T for tyranny, we’re fighting tyranny..” “I know I know. But we thought... I mean.. I’m not sure how much impact that would have..” “Well, what are we to drink now? Huh? None of that good stuff!” “I heard there’s this bean juice people drink, dark like mud. Maybe we give that a go?”

[@migsmethinks5801]

"Well okay then..." "Hey guys, look at this field! There's a bunch of stone 't's here! And there's more 't's in this house with a giant wooden 't' on top!" "Damnit Bobby, those are crosses! We can't dump those in the harbor!" "Maybe he meant 'tease'?" "What, as in striptease? Are you saying all us dudes should board that boat and sensually dump our clothes in the river?" "Sounds kinda fun." "Damnit Bobby! You know what? You can go Hell, but I'll be turning the harbor into the world's largest pot of English Breakfast! Gents, grab your straws. It's time to dump and suck!"

[@noahlonaker2668]

Wanna play a fun drinking game? Everytime you hear “ancient astronaut theorists believe..” take a drink

[@dragonmaster613]

You'd destroy your liver before the third episode

[@Dr.LightMarker5613]

Instructions unclear, I am now the ded. Uhh, by I guess? _Disappears_

[@DisapprovalWew]

“Who is still watching this?” My step dad. I think he’s the only viewer now

[@multiversepatriot3148]

My father in law. He genuinely believes this show and every other one like it. We have arguments and when I pull up stuff that disagrees, he says it’s a government coverup.

[@joe94c]

I had a colleague who believed everything off this dumbass show

[@tomasavendanozacarias5205]

also my grandpa and his wife so we got 3 at least

[@paulsuttle]

My dad loves the absurdity of some of the theories. Same reason he watches those ghost shows.

[@gojiratheking1065]

My father. He doesn't even believe anything they say so I don't understand why the fuck he subjects himself to that shitshow.

[@PeteKellyHistory]

Alternate History Hub - watches every single episode of ancient aliens purely to study and to break down the mess that it is. Absolute hero of our times. We salute you sir.

[@kohnny507]

Damn he must be an alien

[@piebag]

Boo

[@rohaninitiative6058]

these alien videos will feel like baby food when people start to looking into "ascension mechanics" !!!

[@postsingluarity6159]

@@rohaninitiative6058 you mean Stellaris ascension mechanics

[@rohaninitiative6058]

@@postsingluarity6159 similar. There is this book called Voyagers secrets of amenti. Talks about the guardian alliance and Ascension mechanics

[@quantumfoam539]

"Lady of the lake. Or... Alien of the lake!??" The entire show in a nutshell.

[@kylejohnson423]

I love how many people forget that the lady of the lake also dies at one point. Sir Balin chops off her head then parades it around Camelot because she ordered king Arthur to kill him. Yeah, Arthurian myth is kinda like game of thrones, except with a better ending.

[@Travybear1989]

@@kylejohnson423 Anything has a better ending than that show, Supernatural knew how to do an ending but then again had 15 years of preparation.

[@kylejohnson423]

@@Travybear1989 even Lost?

[@mbaxter22]

But it has to be - we all know that strange women lying in ponds is no basis for a system of government!

[@niIIer1]

Yesterday I got a pretty good idea while in my shower. Must have been beamed into my head by an Alien.

[@rowdsterrex7845]

Ancient Astronaut Theorists: "What is this documentary? ITS SO ACCURATE!" Everyone else: "This is Men in Black II."

[@annoyedbipolar7424]

I know that "men and black II was a joyless cash grab" Sounds like something else

[@RandomYT05_01]

Well, the MIB theory explanation does explain why the government tries to hide it. So we don't have a mass panic. Makes sense. really.

[@RenegadeShepard69]

@@RandomYT05_01 Honestly I think it'd be more likely than some whistleblower with association to an entity that has the intent to profit would expose the truth just enough to keep people panicking. Take for example what went down with Jeff Epstein, there had been many folktalkes/conspiracy theories about this "globalist p*do satanist spy elite and etc. etc." for many many years, and having watched for long that kind of content online (guilty pleasure of mine, please don't judge lol, I'm a 2000s history channel kid, so it's only natural I'd gravitate towards 2010s InfoWars youtube lol) I notice that this very panicked and paranoid followers of this kind of belief held onto that version of reality even more with the "little glimpse at the true state of the (new) world (order)" that was Epstein. Similar to people who believe in UFOs, who only need one extraordinary story to feel like every single other is proved. If one alien, let's call him Epstein Alien, came out public, and got suddenly silenced by the "deep state, the clintons xD, the Mossad, Israel, China, idfkwho" there you'll go, you'd have a sheep completely immovable from that conspiracy theory religion just waiting for a shephard to come and save them from the people denying and hiding the "real truth". And thus Alex Jones becomes POTUS, with Giorgio Tsoukalos as Vice Pres. Just as Pizzagate helped Donny. Ok i got carried away. But if "the government was trying to hide it" than I think it'd be more likely for there to be an Epstein story, there is always something that escapes in this day and age. Sorry for the ramble.

[@therealdude707]

Lets see. A franchise with only enough ideas for a flick (or one season) that had to recycle ideas for the sequels. Yeah that checks out.

[@primrosevale1995]

“Hello, I’m Cody. I watched Ancient Aliens so you didn’t have to.”

[@goroakechi6126]

Psychic Yuri took him over.

[@nunyobidniz]

A truly staggering sacrifice

[@TechGroupF430i]

I wonder if Nostalgia Critic still uses that line. #IUnderstoodThatReference

[@goroakechi6126]

@@TechGroupF430i He does.

[@henrypaleveda7760]

let's see "Adam ruins ancient astronauts"

[@southanime]

The idea of aliens traveling galaxies only to reproduce with humans is disturbing in more ways that you can imagine

[@deathsyth8888]

"Doesn't matter, had sex." - Ancient Aliens, after crossing time and space for some intergalactic action.

[@pravkdey]

Fr. However thinking of all the stuff humans have gotten nasty with I'd see it as a point we have in common lol

[@Alejandro_BoniIIa]

Aliens: “still beat tho”

[@marcioborgesreis9066]

For a alien to travel galaxies it may equal for you to cross your room from one point to another , is something you do quick and easy with no efford at all.

[@southanime]

@@marcioborgesreis9066 I don't care if for them is like asking for sugar to their neighbor, that does not mean you can give their pet monkey a creampie

[@baby.nay.]

The best part of the show is the relationship between David childress and Giorgio tsulakulos. When they go visit that mysterious lake in Mexico together they’re just so stoked , especially David , he gets all bumbly when excited .

[@darkfluid5004]

I will say, if only this lore was a show instead of ancient aliens.

[@MickeyMouse-lx3nw]

This

[@merrittanimation7721]

This is basically Stargate SG-1 but taking everything way too seriously.

[@outerheaven155]

Have you seen Resident Alien? It doesn't focus on ancient aliens but it likes to use the lore for jokes and their is one episode with some very special guests.

[@darkfluid5004]

@@outerheaven155 Sound interesting.

[@DannyFedora]

technically not a show but the early assassin's creed plots have similarly batshit lore

[@cardonk5795]

The Virgin “Ancient Civilizations were more advanced than we thought” vs the chad “Aliens did it”

[@belgebelgravia100]

The Average Evidence Enjoyer Vs the Average "Hey that painting of the sun kinda looks like a UFO" Connoisseur

[@whw148]

Vs the thad "we helped aliens build earth"

[@riteshyeddu]

@@whw148 hell yeah!

[@cumunist2120]

the extra chad the ancient civilizations are still around and are so advanced we think theyre aliens

[@vladamirputin2986]

the mega chad "hey maybe other peoples were also smart and were smarter before europe; making this whole idea that only aliens couldve done it very racist" legit tho ancient alien ideas were invented to disprove arguments that ancient peoples who werent white were intelligent lol

[@conlangknow8787]

this is like “i’m not relegious but spiritual” to a whole new level

[@Robb1977]

I mean new age or mindfulness is annoying. But the whole idea is kinda just agnostic for hippies. Ancient aliens is just a cult.

[@g.dalfleblanc63]

An idiot dismisses aliens having come to earth in our past, an even bigger idiot believes we have proof they did. On a side note: 'being spiritual not religious' can mean a lot of things, one example that makes scientific sense is ancestral memories encoded into our DNA, epigenetics supports this. If you're capable go read about how someone's experiences can shape what kind of children they will have.

[@conlangknow8787]

@@Robb1977 yeah kinda

[@conlangknow8787]

@@g.dalfleblanc63 1) if theres no proof of aliens how do we know they were there 2) even with no evidence whats the probability of aliens visiting earth(i.e the universe too big for us to travel to earth and have we seen ufos in space) 3)spiritual but not religious means i get to take the good parts of religions and other beliefs and mush them together(i.e god is real, buddha statues, believing that you can change reality with your mind)

[@ashholiday123]

@@conlangknow8787 You can be not religious but spiritual It's called Buddhism. Or Taoism. Or Confucianism. Or basically any eastern philosophy. Spirituality is basically religion without a god. It's very similar to a philosophy but often contains more spiritual focused elements such as a focus on meditation or yoga. Your comment confuses me, are you implying you have to be religious to be spiritual?

[@emaccus]

Every. Single. Episode. and notes? How did your head NOT explode. So much entertainment, so little time. :)

[@ProjectAdditive]

"I watched every single ancient aliens episode." You truly have made a great sacrifice in the name of comedy, I salute you.

[@Avicerox]

I thought this was an April Fool's video, but I was dead wrong. This is the most accurate video and a masterpiece.

[@alphabet_god1175]

CORRECT

[@mikeoxsmal8022]

@@alphabet_god1175 I knew god is Shrek

[@1RJ2]

agree

[@lewatoaofair2522]

Some of the best April Fools' Day videos treat the day like it's April Whatever.

[@Sinstarclair]

I feel like Ancient Aliens was supposed to be a One Time Gig in the History Channel that ended up being WAY too popular. So they kinda kept the ball rolling, and rolling, and rolling.

[@anothga]

That would definitely explain a couple of things.

[@jewsco]

Sure seem that way

[@Dreagostini]

@Robin The God - Fake ASMR Is Being Stupid At nighttime it's colder than outside.

[@edwincasimir28]

It's the same with most of their shows. I'm pretty sure Rick Harrison never intended for Pawn Stars to have 13+ seasons, but hey - he got so rich from broadcasting that he no longer works in his own pawn shop for a while now. He actually has to be brought in to work only when the show is shooting.

[@edwincasimir28]

@Axiom Steel I can imagine it's more of a drag now than anything else. Dude is probably 60 and retired, has to deal with the camera once a week, and then there's the IRS...

[@SomeRandomBugger]

12:14 It's so on point showing Azmuth from Ben 10, because Azmuth literally made a god sword and gave it to an immortal knight named Sir George.

[@yellowmare8413]

I remember the episode in which, along with saying that he was in contact with aliens/influenced by them and that's where all his inventions came from, they said that Nikola Tesla was born in Transylvania. They couldn't even bother to Google to see where he's from. Truly a show deserving to last sixteen seasons.

[@PokemonkaDub]

He did claim himself that he contacted ailens, so despite that oopsie he'd be proud. Sadly he was mentally ill and never got the help he needed... but that's absolutelly beside the point!

[@caiuscosades1791]

These are the same people who thought King Arthur was real and that his sword was an alien weapon with biometrics that he was able to utilise due to being a special alien superman.

[@Hungeryan]

"they said that Nikola Tesla was born in Transylvania" Oh great, now Hungarians and Romanians get to debate about Tesla's nationality. Amazing.

[@caiuscosades1791]

@@Hungeryan He was Serbian?

[@sirshotty7689]

@@caiuscosades1791 he’s ethnic Serbian, doesn’t really have to do with his nationality as far as I’m aware. He was born in the Austrian-Hungarian empire. Transylvania is in Romania hence the previous comment of “Hungarians and Romanians arguing about his nationality.” Which it’s kind of funny since if we were going off of the modern nations (since by the time of his birth Transylvania wasn’t part of Romania) he’d probably be considered as Croatian since the region he was born in is part of modern day Croatia. Just to be clear, I’m talking about his nationality when he was born.

[@sapcavax7806]

I can imagine a remake of this show in 200 years claiming people in 2020 wore masks because they worshipped some kind of aliens with astronaut helmets. And interpreting coronavirus graphic depictions as a spikey spaceship

[@weirdshrimpnumber9755]

Oh my,well it ''could happen "

[@anthonydio7222]

Giorgios fukked up hair is waiting for that.

[@theturquoisedream9244]

The q non people will be pushing that by next week!

[@henriettacantrell6878]

I do agree that ancient aliens is a religion . I also agree that some of their theorys are a bit far fetched . However, I also believe that they get it right in some instances . I think that no matter what Jesus would have been an alien as he is a spiritual being and not of this world. Anything not of this world would be alien. Artificial insemination would be one way of describing immaculate conception . The powers needed to separate the red Sea could have been superior technology and anything that was done that early man didn't understand, including aliens with super powers , or space ships , or whatever , would seem miraculous and certainly they would have been considered God's. I also think that there is evidence in support of those claims. For example, if it wasn't a space ship that was painted in some of our old masterpieces than what was it? And there's the old sculptures that show astronauts in space suits. Why would they even exist unless they were made by people who saw them. I think that their theorys are just as good as any other theory and they make sense to me. They made me more of a believer than a non believer . I don't think that evolution got it right.

[@henriettacantrell6878]

My theory on masks is that there were pandemics even back then and the face coverings were for the spreading of disease and not for religious reasons. Crazy ? Maybe, but the Bible does speak of diseases that wiped out civilizations. Just a thought

[@adelkheir]

This whole show honestly makes the Emperor of Mankind from warhammer 40k sound more realistic than what they've regurgitated over 15 seasons.

[@captaintitusultramarine]

Ave imperator

[@glennt69lol]

Watch the galaxy burn

[@gwynmarigold9141]

@@captaintitusultramarine Gloria in Excelsis Terra

[@nowhereman6019]

Man, Big E must have been slacking to have let aliens manipulate humanity so much during our history.

[@glennt69lol]

@@nowhereman6019 well he did secretly go into the eye of terra before the primarchs were created, he's kinda shady character

[@Rovertuipop]

Humans and dinosaurs did coexist, but the dinosaurs were just birds

[@astrossarave]

Guy: invents literally a slice of bread Ancient Astronaut Theorist: ok lets explain how aliens made bread

[@ArchangelChi]

Well, no ordinary human could possibly have created something as complicated as bread and then thought up slicing it - that takes alien intervention Just like how stupid humans could never independently think of drawing circles, spirals, and piling stones into pyramidical shapes - that must have been knowledge spread around the globe (and millennia) by aliens Notice how the Ancient Alien Theorists think all the various different civilizations existed at the same time - as if the Maya were building pyramids at the same time as Egypt - even though they were separated by thousands of years

[@albogypsy2842]

Slice of bread? I'm not saying it was aliens but it was A L I E N S

[@Man_Aslume]

Hitler rejected by Art school

[@deusexaethera]

My god. This is so eye-opening. I knew aliens were responsible for our advancement as a species, but I didn't know they were responsible for every single noteworthy thing anyone on Earth ever did. I have so much to thank the aliens for. I hope they see this message.

[@flatflatspin9855]

I play Dungeons and Dragons as the DM. I'm shocked to learn that I didn't create any of the scenarios I ran from my players. I'm so dumb!

[@themoofs6925]

@@flatflatspin9855 that means when I play Skyrim or Witcher I’m not actually choosing how I want to play. It’s all a lie! Noooooo!

[@Marc_W_McKinley]

its an April fools video don't take it litteraly (well the video part of it)

[@egg2520]

No need. Aliens are the reason you want to thank them. They are aware

[@gensaikawakami341]

I would hope the aliens see your message, they were the ones that prompted you to write it in the first place!

[@Trashman_Len]

“The alien we know as...” Me: oh, can’t wait for this. “The grim reaper.” Me: what

[@MichaelWaisJr]

What about the alien known as Bugs Bunny?? He was an alien too!!

[@MichaelWaisJr]

And don’t forget that Don Quixote was an alien. So was Ebenezer Scrooge. And Scrooge McDuck. Monty Python were a band of aliens. Also, rocks are aliens! (How did you think the pet rock franchise got started?? It was aliens!) Yo mamma is also an alien!

[@FFSamurai]

“So I was watching Stargate SG1 and got inspired” - The inspiration for Ancient Aliens.

[@Gigathyn]

12:12 What's funny is that in Ben 10 lore, Saint George's Sword actually was an alien weapon made by Azmuth, just like the Omnitrix.

[@k-techpl7222]

I'd like to imagine that in the Ben 10 Universe, ancient aliens is some how a credible show. By the time omniverse ends, there is literally nothing that would stop them from interviewing aliens on the show.

[@richardwainwright507]

Why do you know the lore?

[@k-techpl7222]

@@richardwainwright507 It was an important plot point in the 3rd series of the show.

[@melelconquistador]

@@richardwainwright507 because we watched it.

[@genieglasslamp5028]

@@richardwainwright507 It's a really solid series.

[@yeezyyankie324]

"Ancient aliens isn't real" Is something an alien would say!

[@Marc_W_McKinley]

lol

[@strengthcolossal5538]

Ay LMAO!

[@shindari]

And with that, you have completely unearthed why these crazies still have a job, despite literally every other human being, on Planet Earth, KNOWING the show is full of bullsh!t...

[@Michasenpai]

@@shindari it is bullshit but entertaining bullshit. Kinda like "the Room". So bad that it is funny enough to watch. Though I had no idea it still runs.

[@satanofficial3902]

@@shindari It's *SEXIST!!!* to use the term "bullsh*t" when she cows go poop, too. And, it's also *SPECIESIST!!!* because non-bovine animals also expel digestion remnants through their anal orifice. In the future, instead of saying "bullsh*t", everyone should please say "Non-gender-specific non-species-specific animal excrement". And instead of using "BS", please use "NSNSAE". Thank you for your cooperation.

[@glimpyrimpy6258]

If our minds can't comprehend what they're doing to us than why would we have people that are aware in the first place?

[@Robb1977]

Welcome to cult logic.

[@TheRealUnkn0wn_289]

Yeah wait how would that be possible, you're right

[@matthewpedicelli3846]

perhaps because they too are aliens!

[@stevepreston5742]

aliens

[@tombuilder1475]

because the so called aware always turn out to be charlatans... every single one from Adamsky to Moore is a fraud.

[@horrible8ilence421]

so if aliens had to teach us everything, how did they learn everything? Super Aliens.

[@yashgulave8366]

Dude literally said, "I'm not saying it's aliens, but it's aliens." 😭😂

[@siriusa21]

Really???? I thought it was just meme lmao😭

[@armandoacevedo7388]

Worst he implied ancient aliens is more ridiculous than religion. He must be a devout Mormon.

[@thierrydecker8110]

The big plot twist at the end of the show will be that there were never any humans, all of us were just aliens all along.

[@txn3346]

adam and eve duh!

[@widowmaker4097]

Really?

[@engr.jomargumboc4458]

_The real aliens are the friends we made along the way!_

[@ynrezcoinirac511]

BINGO!!

[@Freeaviator]

"Wait we're all aliens" "always have been 🔫👽"

[@MrPooleish]

This smacks of the "Shakespeare didn't write Shakespeare" theory, which boils down to "I couldn't have written (a Shakespeare) so clearly he couldn't either."

[@JamesRDavenport]

The Shakespeare theory boils down to one word: Snobbery. A working class tanner's son from the Midlands kicked their asses in story craft. They can't deal with it.

[@AlisonBryen]

@@JamesRDavenport As a Midlander I really appreciated this comment.

[@JamesRDavenport]

@@AlisonBryen And as an American descendant of Midlanders I appreciate yours.

[@AlisonBryen]

@@JamesRDavenport Nice to "meet" you...where abouts did your family originate? I have family that emigrated to the US from South Staffordshire in the mid 19th century and now reside in Maryland and Utah.

[@JamesRDavenport]

@@AlisonBryen My old country home is to your east. A village called Kilby in Leicestershire. My forebearer came to America as an indentured servant to a privateer. His payment was a little river island in the middle of Carolina colony. Flash forward a few hundred years, and we're the largest farm family in that NC county, and all over the US. Richard Damporte/Davenport and kin did good!

[@JVanHarlinger]

You summed up a thousand episodes of Ancient Aliens in 23 minutes....lmao! And in layman's terms too! Bravo!

[@grtwhtbnr]

People really dont give Robert Clotworthy, the narator, enough credit for being able to repeat those lines with a straight face

[@N0TYALC]

*Is it possible that Robert Clotworthy’s seemingly inhuman ability to repeat nonsense without laughing was aided by an extraterrestrial benefactor?*

[@grtwhtbnr]

@@N0TYALC well done sir!

[@JamesRDavenport]

@@N0TYALC So.....the Aliens created the star child Jack Daniel so he could give the Narrator Tennessee sipping whiskey? I like it!

[@vinnieg6161]

Mate you can say this about any priest or pastor reading from the bible or Koran or whatever

[@JamesRDavenport]

@@vinnieg6161But we'll start with the craziest shit of all...the insane theories/writings of modern atheism. It takes a special level of dumbass to believe nothing created everything with such complexity.

[@murplesman]

*Ancient Aliens exists* Religious people: WTF Atheists: WTF Practically everyone minus the show's creators: WTF

[@edmundthespiffing2920]

Aliens: WTF

[@temkin9298]

@@edmundthespiffing2920 Can't say they wouldn't think that. Alien: The hell is these guys doing???

[@j.epstein7723]

@@edmundthespiffing2920 this is the funniest reply. This comment almost seems like it was made for your reply. Actually laughed out loud

[@nineix9438]

@@j.epstein7723 good to know, jeff

[@j.epstein7723]

@@nineix9438 Glad to help.

[@dialaskisel5929]

"I watched every single episode..." You are the hero we don't deserve.

[@eleosparakhaous]

But the one that we need

[@PandemoniumMeltDown]

Therefore alien, he is.

[@Dianasaurthemelonlord7777]

True, he does a great job

[@darthmortus5702]

Or need.

[@Ryzard]

I like that they just don't consider, "perhaps these dimension travelling god level aliens had no need for gold? or could just... make their own? or extract it instantly? instead of shitty miners with stone tools?

[@Heliogabalos]

Imagine believing that ancient humans knew how to stack rocks.

[@Man_Aslume]

Imagine what the ancient human felt after discovering stacking rocks

[@iken1308]

Screw that, Imagine how aliens taught them how to stack rocks.

[@larrytinsley4247]

they stacked rocks heavier than the limit of most modern cranes

[@coreytaylor5386]

@@larrytinsley4247 not really, 2-3 tonne rocks are pretty easy to stack even without a crane. hell, get a dozen drunk frat guys together and they could lift a 2 ton car and move it across a parking lot just to screw with a guy

[@tux_duh]

​@@larrytinsley4247i mean it's crazy what can happen when you give a human a problem and a multitude of time to get it done, we've already proved time and time the methods they used it just takes a simple search

[@Door01]

props to this man for willingly spending 16 seasons worth of his life that he will never get back for a 20 minute internet video

[@charlesborden8111]

The upside is Cody can probably use it as a tax write off. LOL

[@joefuller3886]

theres acctualy like 17 or 18 seasions of this lol

[@derpynerdy6294]

@Greg David maybe a clip on yt like a summary ehhee

[@captiancrunch1840]

Yeah but he's making that doe though.

[@juniorboyd6974]

I don’t believe he actually watched every episode. Matter fact I know he didn’t watch every episode or he would have a different perspective about it.

[@kakarroto007]

The first time I saw Ancient Aliens, I died a little inside, because I knew The History Channel was officially dead.

[@PremierCCGuyMMXVI]

Ikr, these educational programs are airing conspiracy theories. I get it’s for entrainment but people take it seriously.

[@Skull35]

I miss Modern Marvels.

[@kakarroto007]

@@Skull35 Me too! A lot of those old episodes are scattered around KZbin, FWIW.

[@AleF202]

The stupidification of the masses. I remember when the History channel was about ACTUAL HISTORY.

[@emperorfaiz]

@@Skull35 Shit, I miss that show so much.

[@jamesdavies7664]

I STRAPPED MYSELF IN AND WATCHED EVERY EPISODE OF ANCIENT ALENS. ...my dude, you've gained my respect for life.

[@Sabarok]

Alternate-Alternate History: The people behind the show are aliens trying to distract us from our own history.

[@Johnny-rx4hs]

They are more like wannabe L Ron Hubbards

[@QTheRabbit]

Alternate-Alternate-Alternate History: Aliens discovered humans in 2009 and thought we had cooler history and mythologies than them so they created this show to try to insert themselves into our history.

[@thememelord2394]

@@QTheRabbit Big Brain

[@audiosurfarchive]

This is really good. I like that.

[@MrlspPrt]

@@QTheRabbit they became themselves into Stephanie Meyer or that woman who wrote Fifthy Shades of Grey...

[@grawlixghost5766]

apparently, the ancient astronauts have a fondness of stones as they build their monuments with stones. after travelling from distant stars in sophisticated spaceships filled with amazing gadgetry and all they could think of building are pyramids made of stones

[@smergthedargon8974]

Massive stone blocks are just legos for aliens.

[@baeuy5019]

The aliens are stoners

[@deathkorpsofkriegguardsmen8488]

@@smergthedargon8974 space legos

[@rainbow_vader]

Alien: you may not like it but this is what peak performance looks like 💪😎 Peak performance: 🪨

[@rainbow_vader]

@@baeuy5019 the aliens and I would get along then

[@zeroenth7743]

"So I strapped myself in, and watched every. Single. Episode." You brave soul.

[@dagfinissocool]

I don't believe him. Come on it's like 100 hours and he wouldn't even need to watch everything to get what they're talking about.

[@zeroenth7743]

@@dagfinissocool I'm picturing he did it Clockwork Orange style and was literally strapped into the chair in front of monitors each playing every episode at once. On loop.