The Hydraulic Telegraph and Latin Grease: Citation Needed 5x01

We're back! Good luck to everyone who's subscribed since the last season, heaven knows what you'll think of it. This time, we're talking about ancient technology, Morse code, and taking a brief diversion into Latin!
At the end of last season, we talked about doing a live show, and I'm happy to say that IT'S ON... but almost all the tickets are already gone! There may be occasional returns and newly available tickets here: www.techdif.co.uk/live/ -- and if not, you can join the wait list for when they become available!
BONUS MATERIAL: • Carl Sagan's Carlisle:...
FULL PLAYLIST: • Citation Needed, from ...
WEB SITE and MORE AUDIO EPISODES: techdif.co.uk
Thanks again to our anonymous subtitler!
TOM is at tomscott.com or @tomscott on Twitter
MATT is at mattg.co.uk or @unnamedculprit
GARY is @garybrannan on Twitter
and CHRIS doesn't do this social media nonsense.

[@brandonmartin-moore5302]

Someone has done Latin subtitles. Of course they have.

[@simoncanttakevideos6727]

tintinnabulum

[@tobiasg_91]

And they even used the "correct" notation for years - not only using Roman numerals, but also counting years since the founding of Rome (ab urbe condita). A for outstanding effort!

[@rekagaal]

Yes, and when Tom say "a point and a ding" in the intro, it's translated as "punctum tintinnabulumque", and that's just great.

[@kitstorm7637]

@@rekagaal what does even mean I do not Latin speak

[@really-quite-exhausted]

@@kitstorm7637 It literally means "a point and a ding". "Punctum" means "point". "Tintinnabulum" means "bell" and you put "-que" on the end of the second word to mean "and".

[@Anopano3000]

The rewatchability of citation needed is fantastic. And when I miss it subconsciously, my brain helpfully provides me with "Burt Bacharach's Back Crack and Sack" on loop.

[@ThePixel1983]

Re-watch it in Latin, it's great!

[@shavranotheferanox7809]

I always thought it whas sack and crack

[@actua99]

For a certain definition of _helpful,_ I'm sure it's _helpful_ :P

[@beth12svist]

Mine does that with "It was never not a cow!"

[@imoutodaisuki]

​​@@beth12svist "Yes, it's 'cow'."

[@TimEd.o7o7]

5 years past, and I just want to thank the people who made the Latin captions for this. Biscocti Mysterii

[@nicodam2066]

tom: *says something to vaguely get the show back on track* Everyone else: NO

[@helloiamenergyman]

That's the best part of it :)

[@katedoes...9783]

Frigora habeo. Illa multiplicant

[@katedoes...9783]

Currently writing a master's dissertation on Latin poetry with this on in the background.

[@josephrissler9847]

Thumbs up for not just using Google translate like everyone else in these comments

[@MattGrayYES]

We were bloody close then considering we were doing it on the spot!

[@CrucialNoise]

Wouldn't it be: frigora habeo, multiplicantes?

[@GordonHugenay]

I'd rather say: frigora multiplicantia habeo or: frigora qua multiplicant habeo

[@StephenDahlke]

In the episode where we get a handle on nouns, we use "biscuit" as a verb. Glad to see the new series has started! :D

[@bufftailedbumbledragon450]

And the old favourite, 'kaploded' is also back!

[@smeggerknee2448]

biscuit.....means? Twice-baked. or Twice-cooked

[@SylviaRustyFae]

@@smeggerknee2448 Biscuit as a verb means to bestow mystery biscuits upon someone, usually for some insight or hilarity that theyve stated.

[@blunderbus2695]

Verbing weirds language.

[@addisonchan3053]

4 years later, Tom forgets about Matt's GCSE.

[@kasperjrgensen3761]

In what video?

[@addisonchan3053]

@@kasperjrgensen3761 One of the TOTPAL vids.

[@elifarmer3815]

Something something glandular leaves

[@cloudysky5701]

@@elifarmer3815 triangular glandular

[@chaiznt]

@@cloudysky5701 (pause) *leaves*

[@rubysky5359]

"Are you done?" -Tom Scott, 2016

[@LauraSchmaura]

The level of exasperation in Tom's voice makes me think that "There are shoes! And there are boxes!" etc went on an awful lot longer before the edit...

[@Brannersatlarge]

I'd like to say it didn't, but I've a funny feeling it did.

[@tripleb5197]

Do you happen to know what they're referencing with that? Like, the "there are shoes, and there are boxes, and there are houses and there are doors" and "today we're learning about things, today we're learning about flags..." I honestly have no idea.

[@Brannersatlarge]

+TripleB519 I dint in all honesty think we were referencing anything, or if we were then I wasn't and I was just going with it. I think.

[@tripleb5197]

Wow! KZbin's Gary Brannan replied to my comment! Thanks KZbin's Gary Brannan!

[@gwenynorisu6883]

You mean "shooooooze" :) (one of those inherently funny words, at least when drawn out) It all sounds like a general parody of all cod-educational toddler-distracting TV shows ever, really, with a heavy emphasis on mashing up Sesame Street, Playschool and Balamory.

[@Exurb1a]

Is Matt naturally that happy, or are recreational pharmaceuticals involved? I don't think there's been a single video where he's been less than ludicrously jolly.

[@suncu91]

I love your channel.

[@kristina80ification]

I thought doing youtube videos pretty much is his job though, or was that before he started doing it full time?

[@gupdoo3]

+Kandi Gloss Tom's the one who KZbins full time, Matt works as a broadcast engineer.

[@JoshWright396]

Matt works in TV production.

[@aimelle3]

Radio, not TV.

[@RowanB6]

Tom is an exasperated dad with three overly-excitable kids on a long car ride trying desperately not to resort to "I'll turn this car around"

[@Lizz85257]

BACK TO WINNIPEG

[@mlatpren]

The reason for trying not to resort to "I'll turn this car around" being that if he says that, they'll aim for getting him to *actually* turn the car around, and annoy him the entire way back too

[@thequeenofspades]

I would happily watch Gary's documentary on Hydraulic London.

[@gwenynorisu6883]

I think he'd make a fine addition to the unexpected documentarist pantheon, alongside Chris Barrie, James May and Michael Portillo. And of course as an archivist he's in just the right place to unearth all _kinds_ of fascinating tidbits...

[@Reletr]

Jay Foreman's Unfinished London but Brannan digging through archives to discuss London's shipping and engineering history whilst referencing Radio 4's shipping forecast

[@ezekielmartin4323]

​@@Reletr I was just gonna say, I immediately have the Unfinished London theme tune stuck in my head except it's autotuned splash sound effects

[@tomwilliams2705]

English - I've got chills, they're multiplying. Latin - Ego autem frigora et multiplicata es. Literal - I have shivers, and they are multiplying.

[@caenieve]

I however shivers, and you are multiplied

[@Near_Void]

@@caenieve Habeo gelat, ipsi erant 'multiplicari?

[@caenieve]

@@Near_Void I have it freezes, those guys were multiplication

[@caenieve]

In case my point is not patently obvious, Google Translate from English to Latin is completely non-functional and outputs completely meaningless and agrammatical Latin sentences

[@Near_Void]

@@caenieve ego sum quibus alitur sopor erant 'multiplicari?

[@Muskoxing]

That Archimedes' Screw joke is low-key the best in the whole series.

[@metropod]

Ladies and gentlemen, "Biscuit" has become a verb....

[@catfish552]

Everything is a verb if you're brave enough.

[@Fematika]

You just turned verb into a verb.

[@columbus8myhw]

Anything's a verb if you verb it.

[@Becky_Cooling]

well I frequently use headphone as a verb. 'I'm going to my room to headphone for an hour' (i know it should be headphones but one side is broken, so it is singular)

[@TomScottGo]

If you've subscribed to this channel recently: good luck! It's been a while since the last season... Pull down the description for the whole playlist, and a link for tickets to our live show. They've almost sold out -- there's a waitlist you can join, or check back occasionally for any returns!

[@jamesheritage1209]

The audio only episodes or Citation Needed are not on techdif website yet. Will they be soon, I have a upcoming flight that would be massive improved by so CT.

[@nerdwiththehat]

Are there plans to put the live show up or livestream it? Very excited to hear about it, but I live in the US (wahn wahhhh).

[@rahonavisostromi9443]

I love when all the guys just take off with: "There are flags.. orangutans... shoes, doors.. " - "Today we have a handle on nouns"...... :) Great stuff guys - was really looking forward to this season. Hi from Ireland!

[@jamesheritage1209]

+Liam Hefferman I feel you man, back at uni elsewhere in August it is being recorded for later upload I think, but check the site

[@ascotchegg]

Yes i love this whoop

[@TelevisionVault]

There's the quote of the episode: "For God's sake, will someone biscuit that man!"

[@Zelmel]

I miss the community subtitle feature so much. That Latin caption set.

[@spider5600]

The speed of this show. It feels like I've just been clubbed round the head with a QI boxset

[@itak1996]

spider5600 That is terrifyingly accurate

[@gwenynorisu6883]

"hit me with 17 pounds of QI"

[@QuantumLeclerc]

@@gwenynorisu6883 It's not the Royal Ordnance QF 17pdr, it's the Royal Ordnance QI 17pdr.

[@chrisoddy8744]

@@QuantumLeclerc 76.2 millimetre solid shot facts... Nice.

[@icyachilles5078]

i watch all these episodes on 1.5x speed and this episode killed me

[@m3lod1an]

There's a shop near me called "Nouns: A Person's Place for Things" that is just full of absolutely incomprehensible objects

[@Onlythebesttracks]

That moment with the flags and water reminded me so much of the cast winding up Steven Fry on QI when he was trying to get out the line "They say of the Acropolis, where the Parthenon is"

[@RivaltorGaming]

♩ ♪ they say of the acropolis where the parthenon is ♫ ♬

[@Slye_Fox]

What do they say? What do they say?

[@AceSkates]

any of these chaps would make fantastic QI panellists!

[@Tjousk]

after this, it better be good.

[@vaclav_fejt]

When I ran out of Citation Needed, I tried QI and I said to myself "Holy moly, this feels just like Citation Needed, only more mainstream" (Don't stone me yet, I'm not saying TechDif stole the idea, it is clearly a different show. Also, there is a buttload of comedy panel shows in the UK. Also, this is a youtube show.)

[@Fronken89]

"It's all piss and witchcraft" has to be the best description of Science i've heard in a very long time :D

[@Joelsfilmer]

*pissing witchcraft Still works, though.

[@TheExalaber]

When they mentioned Halifax, I thought to my self, for just a moment , "why did they all go to Nova Scotia as kids," then I felt stupid.

[@taliaroses]

And when they said "Eureka" I thought to myself "Wait, isn't that a town in California?"

[@ZeldaTheSwordsman]

Brits are thrifty. They recycle names the same way they recycle actors.

[@arachnenet2244]

Matt's pronunciation of "Antelope" had me in tears

[@ezekielmartin4323]

And oRAHNGuTANGs

[@caenieve]

I love how it's a professional podcast and presented with aftereffects and is so high quality, but it's also just four guys in the corner of the kitchen

[@Asmejg0204]

RIP Burt Bacharach

[@mickthomas8983]

Re: Archimedes' Screw. They made an irreverent documentary about it: This, His Spiral Tap

[@philaeew4866]

I cannot believe I got this reference.

[@gwenynorisu6883]

Ah, MSN messenger. You know the least well known handy feature about it, especially in an age before emojis? You could _make your own emoticons_ and send them to your mates, as well as just use the microsoft e-ink feature to scribble things. Somewhere I've got screenshots of particularly fertile interchanges with mates back in the noughties (it was the only way to really preserve them, once the news came in that they were retiring the service) that devolved into just sending offensive doodles back and forth. As well as the fairly comprehensive set of DIY icons I'd built up (and you had to be fairly creative, as they were limited to something like 16x16 pixels, and possibly even the windows default colour palette...) What I'd give for that these days. I can never find the emoji I actually want. Any time you think of a particular thing you might want to send as a pictogram for either speed, compactness/bandwidth saving, or more likely just plain comedy purposes... there's at least a 50% chance that you won't find anything even _remotely_ similar to it, let alone the exact thing. But I could scribble up a good-enough looking facsimile within a 32x32 pixel grid and a 256 colour palette fairly quickly... OK, sure, that 1kb would still be quite a bit bigger than a text message, but it's still a lot smaller than a photo and would definitely fit inside an MMS.

[@CrippleX89]

Aahh yes, the home-made emojis! I remember making a Bin Laden one right after 911 as an 11-year-old. Hardly recognizable at 16x16 of course, but still

[@benjoabate2091]

Chris at 6:50 "Those are my cubits baby" is maybe the best line ever

[@OtakuBookworm]

Of all the KZbin videos to have Latin subtitles I'm so so glad this is the one

[@isabellamorris7902]

Would the "chills" in Latin be "frigora" or "horrida" (meaning "shudders" or "trembles")? "Frigora" is more literal but "horrida" might also convey the meaning, and also begins with a soft h sound, so you could probably use some elision if you wanted to make it scan...

[@ProtoGhostal1701]

This is the first time I've heard of Citation Needed. I am very confused. Entertained, but confused.

[@ThePixel1983]

Oh, you got a lot to catch up! But make it last until they come back after the pandemic!

[@JF-us4sn]

Rewatching 5+ years later and laughing just as hard. Well done :)

[@skyeturner5003]

the Latin subtitles, when I am able to read them "hyperloop", "super-ring" the translations are amazing and so creative

[@otakuribo]

"For the love of God, somebody biscuits that man!"

[@ElixirOfRivalry]

Oh my god Tom’s “are ya done?” is camp and I love it!

[@iriscandy6377]

Nice

[@brc2396]

Come for the Things You May Not Know, Stay for the Citation Needed. Love The Paul Revere Joke BTW.

[@wolframstahl1263]

Nothing on youtube makes me laugh out loud like this. I am officially in tears!

[@twojuiceman]

When Gary's talking about atmospheric trains, the seals weren't made of rubber, they were leather, treated with tallow to keep it supple, and the TALLOW is what attracted rats

[@stormbob]

NEW CITATION NEEDED!!!!! It's been a hell of a week here in the States and this is exactly what I needed today. Thank you Tom, Chris, Gary, and Matt!

[@7thtester460]

Been hell of a day today in England

[@williamwoods477]

+7thTester What happened

[@MikhaelEternal]

A member of parliament, who was generally thought of as doing good, was murdered.

[@Lleldorellin]

To anyone who is making subtitles for the Citations needed : thank you so much!

[@KingTaltia]

Finally! I've been waiting SO much for this season! I love you guys!

[@MHellstrand]

I'm an early teenager. I used MSN Messenger when I was 2 years old. I would message my dad while he was at work, and my dad thought it was my mom typing pretending it was me. Then he got home and found me playing Age of Empires II sitting on my mom's lap. I've been a computer kid for a long time, and I REMEMBER MSN MESSENGER!

[@black_platypus]

2 years old? I can't even remember being 2 O.o

[@gwenynorisu6883]

Jesus, that's like if my younger brother still remembered playing on the Spectrum my parents borrowed one summer (and I learned to both type and code BASIC on... at the age of about 4 or 5). Must have made a heck of an impression on you.

[@boltstrikes429]

ye well where i live "internet" wasn't really a thing till 2006, and even then it was a really prestigious thing. By the time internet became widely accessible, facebook had already taken off, so ye no one here remembers MSN, no matter how old...

[@js0988]

I have used the internet since 1982 when I was 6 and the web since 1993. I have never used MSN Messenger.

[@gonkdroid4prez539]

"tremorēs habeō, multiplicant." (I used tremor, tremoris because shiver was the closest I could find to "chills")

[@ZachHixsonTutorials]

10:05 this needs to be a GIF!

[@black_platypus]

That would be a lovely bit, connecting every TD/CN fan :)

[@TheBailingling]

Why did I think watching this within hours of getting work done in my mouth would be a good idea? .... yeah, the pain is so worth it.

[@ShrubRustle]

Ah, back when the 'hyperloop' was just a concept, and was going to be a vacuum tube, and was going to go super duper uber fast you guys

[@cadari2]

Couldn't have been better timing, Tom. I was about ready to start watching reruns of Citation Needed to fulfill my need for more, and we all know we wouldn't want that! Seriously, though, this is always great. That's for the great material and edits. I always look forward to more Citation Needed.

[@joelshort2907]

Can Gary (or anyone else) recommend a decent book about that Hydraulic power system under London? It sounds fascinating!

[@carolineowe7055]

I began the relationship with my now fiancé over MSN. I feel really old when I tell that story even though I'm only 25.

[@TheLenmae]

Thanks a lot for producing this show. The audio's balanced very well.

[@FrozenLavaDragonProd]

Yay!!! Citation Needed is back! These upcoming weeks will be cool!

[@_Egitor]

First time viewer of the show from the Netherlands here, loved every second of it. I'll be watching all previous seasons now, bye :D

[@amandamchugh1665]

This is the best thing to happen all week! I've been looking forward to this so much :)

[@RiverAveryFox]

It's good to have you all back! Strong start, I look forward to the next episodes.

[@Jonago.]

I absolutely love that someone made Latin subtitles

[@mistaecco]

I've been watching since season 3 started, I absolutely love CN, tom! Keep it up :D

[@mattp.158]

Love these, especially the funny accents. Preemptive congrats on 500k subs!

[@thorbengrell941]

The plugs in the background around 10:53 slightly unsettle me, looking at how they'd perfectly fit the pattern on the wall if they were 2 centimetres lower

[@PSpurgeonCubFan]

I know the main purpose of these episodes is primarily humor and camaraderie. I love those aspects, but I often really enjoy the history lesson within as well. Thank Guys!

[@beth12svist]

It's not always history, but there IS a lot of history. As a history lover, I enjoy that aspect a lot, too.

[@gobber121]

Saw Chris in my hometown on my way to work, made my day and yes he is that jolly even really fecking early!

[@eamonahern7495]

I love how he randomly brought orangutans into the conversation. 😄

[@toaofender]

It it 2021, and this is still my favorite episode.

[@MLeoDaalder]

Upon rewatching, another problem with the two connected tubes would be weather. If the tubes are far enough away the local air pressure might defer and you just created a barometer.

[@Meb8Rappa]

Your laughter is highly contagious. I love it!

[@vkillion]

And I pedanted Gary's Morse code in yet a different way. I was thinking it was saying "Ooooooooooooooo"!

[@imnonene]

Whoever CC this video in Latin I salute you you magnificent bastard

[@cxmer7n]

NEW SERIES THANKKK YOUUUU

[@thegoalogre]

I honestly cannot explain how happy I am that this is a thing. Easily the most genuinely hilarious thing I've seen in quite some time

[@tcocaine]

I fucking love this channel. You bring all these funny, yet clever guys that are just perfect for the show. Thanks for doing what you're doing, Tom. EDIT: On a side note, congrats on 500k!

[@1_GigaWaffle]

As brilliant as ever. Thank you so much guys))

[@infrabread]

Been here since Series 1 and loved every second of it!

[@johnvcarroll]

Welcome back. English (I got chills. They're multiplying.) to Latin (Ego autem frigora. Et multiplicata es.) and back to English (I was cold and increased.)

[@eligibbons2155]

That means (I think) "I However cold. Any you are multiplying". It should be "frigoras (colds) Habeo (I have) et (and) frigorae (colds) multiplicatant (they are multiplying)". You have to mention colds twice because it changes from object to subject.

[@p1rgit]

habeo frigora multiplicantes; frigora mea multiplicantes sunt; heu, frigora mea - nomen illis legion multiplicanturque!!! :D

[@verycarla67]

Romanes eunt domus!

[@matthehat]

Yay! You're back!

[@LandinngGear]

So happy this is back!!

[@emilyjanet455]

I'm a music teacher, I have a student working on a Bacharach song. And damn if I don't think to myself "Burt Bacharach back sack and crack" every single freaking time.

[@KirbyofDarkness]

That was...fast paced, wild, and I'm honestly not sure what just happened. Can't wait for more.

[@commandohazelnuts]

This is easily my favorite podcast to date!!

[@onionbot2]

‘it was like facebook messenger, only s***ter’ Me who’s never used facebook: hm yes

[@Slikx666]

So happy to have this back!

[@DanielMumby]

I've already watched this three times and it's still hysterically funny. Thank you gents for cheering me up in a nasty day :)

[@Controlalt3l1t3]

saw season 4 caused me to watch the entire back catalog now for season 5

[@TheTrekkie12]

My favorite thing on youtube is back!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[@CaseyCook25]

YAAAAAAAAAAAASSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!! The episode hasn't even started yet, and I'm already excited!

[@BrodytheCuber]

YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!! I needed this so badly!!!!!

[@MySisterIsASlytherin]

So happy to have CN back!

[@SamanthaCharlotteLozano]

Gelua habeo: multiplicant. I'm still in latin and I think this would be the translation. So excited for the new season! You guys are great!

[@tasmith1122]

Yay!n so happy to see you back.

[@amandamchugh1665]

Also if you really want corrections for the Latin, it's somewhere along the lines of 'habeo sucussi, multiplicant' (there isn't a word for 'chills' but this is shiver as a plural noun). Never thought I'd ever use any of the five years of Latin I learned, especially not for writing corrections of Grease lyrics in the comments section of a KZbin video. Anyone who feels like correcting what I've written, please do....

[@Brannersatlarge]

Well, I technically do Medieval Latin, so hark at you with your correct declensions and tenses and such.

[@katedoes...9783]

I used frigor, frigores (3n) used by epic writers of cold winds and by prose writers of physical chills.

[@amandamchugh1665]

I forgot that word (it is a lot more sensible to use that as opposed to succusi (I spelt it wrong in the original comment oops))

[@katedoes...9783]

+Amanda McHugh I do Ovid and he uses it all the time!

[@jasonhowell7763]

Series 5! I'm so excited! This is my favorite TV show that isn't on TV!

[@umgubularslashkilter9272]

i like it when Tom's existential crisis about him getting older rears up it's head

[@felixstone7306]

Tom, I love this so much. Would there be any way of us seeing the full length show without having to see the live show as I live in Australia but love the show? PS. can't wait for more.

[@TomScottGo]

+Felix “Felix S Films” stone Most of the show will make it online at some point - it will be filmed!

[@felixstone7306]

Thanking you greatly.

[@felixstone7306]

***** PS we still haven't forgiven you for Season 1 episode 1, that's a national treasure that is

[@adamtaylor911]

Love Eureka in Halifax, great place.

[@EriqireM]

WOO NEW SEASON HYPE!!

[@RivaltorGaming]

that was a surprisingly fast edit can't wait for the live show

[@eihples]

Oh yes, I've been waiting for this!

[@dancingtiger577]

Citation Needed makes me so happy.

[@DanteneNyx]

This is without a doubt one of the funniest shows I've ever seen!

[@SolarPolarMan]

This is up way sooner than I thought :D

[@atorodudjjdiiak9421]

This episode was way ahead of its time