The Life Of A Scrum Master | Prime Reacts

[@kamilkardel2792]

"Our scrum master was fired and no one saw the difference."

[@MoonShadeStuff]

I worked in a team where everything from communication to workflow to mindset was awful but also nobody wanted to listen to the Scrum Master either. In that case him leaving also made no impact.

[@monad_tcp]

I'm loving this tech crunch, finally

[@lmoelleb]

Then he was one of the better scrum masters. Most of them will give a benefit when leaving. :D

[@georgeyoung2684]

'Scrum master' was never supposed to be a dedicated job. It is supposed to just be a role that an existing member of the team fulfils.

[@exapsy]

It's supposed to be a dev that leads the discussion on a daily standup lol yeah. The company I'm working for had an "Agile Coach", think of it like "the boss of SCRUM Master who brings negative instead of zero value", they fired her, they not only saw 0 difference but people left because of her before and how toxic she was lmao.

[@monad_tcp]

@@exapsy " but people left because of her " that's a win.

[@exapsy]

@@monad_tcp a mate that I used to be colleagues with left because of her before I went to the company, with 1-2 months gap. now I could be working alongside a fellow mate who I liked:( he left because she was toxic then somebody made an allegation against her, discovered she was toxic and useless, and they fired her.

[@thewiirocks]

I despise professional scrum masters. With a few key exceptions, they're pretty much always cowards who refuse to make an impact even when given explicit instructions on how to impact the team. But that might offend someone by _suggesting_ that things are off track and need to pulled back on. Can't do that! Much better to let the team and entire project crash and burn instead. The Scrum Masters are so useless that they literally create the perception that Scrum is a non-process where someone just chases you around for status. Even though the core point of the process is to _eliminate_ statusing! 🤦‍♂

[@Thezftw]

@@thewiirocks That's not how it should be. We have "professional scrum masters" and I almost feel like their most important role is to be a fire shield between the customer and the developers while also contesting customers on their requests/requirements and facilitating all the required meetings etc. to keep the projects on track. I don't think the current project I worked on (finally finished by the end of this month!) has been off-track even once. Great people (the two I've worked with recently), wouldn't work any other way in a scrum team.

[@SuperPranx]

When I was supposed to get scrum training as a dev, the only available course was the one for certified scrum master, so after 3 days of training I became one XD I keep renewing the certificate every two years because whenever I’m having a discussion with someone about scrum and they try pushing some inefficient shit on the team “because scrum”, I can pull that thing out and reinforce my arguments with an “ I AM a certified scrum master” XD

[@w_3ird0h]

You are my super hero

[@abdulwahabkhan4316]

i want to donate you my kidneys

[@wesleyrm]

Genius, I will look into these bullshit certifications in the future! Some timewate but at least I can avoid trouble or even improve my bargaining power lol

W

[@d0cx]

The scrum master on my team is actually a really good guy. Never asks for status updates, if management needs a status update, they schedule it with the people on our team who are working on that project. Our scrum master has been really helpful in getting us unblocked and serves as kind of like a communication adapter to the rest of the organization.

[@errrzarrr]

That would make sense before videoconferencing and direct-messages apps were invented. Today we have a ton of them of all kinds: Zoom, Teams, Meet, Slack, WebEx. More so, even poor tools like Jira are good at communicating to a broad audience as it allows to view other's progress/blockers without having to actually arrange more meetings. Not even talking about cloud solutions such as Office 365 and Google workspace where the team can have live shared communication. You don't need to be the Super Soft Skills Guys who arrange meetings in order to "communicate"

[@d0cx]

@@errrzarrr I get that. I still think in a large, disorganized organization with awful documentation it's important to have someone who kind of knows what's going on.

[@skyhappy]

@@d0cx How would someone who's not acquainted with the work know what's going on? The manager should be organizing the team. It's the manager's job.

[@olemew]

@@skyhappy why would you need a manager "organizing" the team if you have a scrum master and a self-organizing team

[@skyhappy]

@@olemew by organized I mean making sure the team is not blocked and people get to help they need. A good manager makes a scrum master useless

[@lankymoose1831]

Prime making dolphin noises was the crossover we never knew we needed

[@mohammaddh8655]

i love that part

[@Endelin]

Pirate Software can't make dolphin noises that good.

[@benitoe.4878]

Ecco the dolphin in trouble.

[@iulianbojinca7309]

Joke aside. After almost 10 years of working in SCRUM teams (as a developer) I can say that Scrum Master is basically the direct reference to a Game Master. They are the referee of the project and they make sure the story goes on. The big difference is that they have no power for the creative part of the story, but they have the ultimate power for keeping the project on track and well defined. To give an example: at some point I've seen a Scrum Master wipe the floor with product owners and devs equally, just because they didn't managed to make some kind of changes to the tickets the team has been working on or they should have started to work on.

[@mascot4950]

I was recently in a project with not one, but two "certified" scrum masters. It was/is the least productive project I have ever encountered. No one seemed to want to actually _do_ anything, every meeting was about designing a workflow, or producing reports to show progress, or adding items to a backlog etc. Before the project was put on hold for a while due to outside circumstances, I had a three hour workshop with the one other person who shared my "should we perhaps actually _do_ something?" persuasion, and we had more progress during those hours than in the previous four months that I had been part of the project. It was absolutely bonkers.

[@timgwallis]

So when you don’t do your job, nothing happens, but when you do your job, something happens? Yeah, that is bonkers.

[@azizsafudin]

@@timgwallishis point is that the scrum master has no impact whatsoever. Basically worthless.

[@Evilanious]

In my experience the scrum master does two kinds of things. One, as mentioned in the video is to nag people doing something useful about how they think we should structure and log our tasks. The other one is a variety of dull administrative tasks that some middle-manager wants done. I see these guys preparing meeting rooms, setting up the workspace for the new guy who arrives later and making progress charts. Usually these 'team coaches' effectively become somebodies secretary.

[@jikaikas]

isnt the admin task the po job?

[@lpls]

@@jikaikasnope

[@amrrahmy123]

I guess depends on the company as well. Some companies have project managers to conduct meetings with clients. Can steer a team onto or out of the right track. Can add bad features to a good product, because that’s how he understood clients new requirements. Or theoretically can be a sort of team lead that can design and steer features in the right direction to ensure project success. I have never seen a manager or scrum master actually contributing positively, but in theory, it can happen if the right person is the manager or team lead and it’s a person that’s an engineer and not a business leech.

[@AlecMaly]

Moved to security, no scrum. It's amazing. Prime's description is accurate: "What are you doing?" **points** "Great, keep up the good work."

[@willianjaques]

Not gonna lie, the dolphin spirit impression caught me of guard

[@MenkoDany]

The ending had me laugh out loud

[@BardBardd-ry6tw]

The dolphin sound he made for long stretch did it for me

[@ThaitopYT]

That was unexpected, I can't stop laughing. lol

[@Sindoku]

Lmao it was perfect

[@vintner_]

Here in Brasil (Brasil mentioned, I know), I worked at a startup where my boss was both the CTO, Tech Lead and Scrum master of the team. It worked pretty nicely, because his role was deciding who would get each task and how they were allocated, but it's funny to me that he knew having a separate scrum master would be useless and took on the role himself.

[@comicsans2516]

yeah after working with both a big team and a small team(for entry level jobs) I realized how good a manager can be while also working on the same things the rest of the team is doing

[@tamirsalem76]

Brasil let's fucking go but yeah, scrum master can't be a role in itself lol

[@monad_tcp]

If you really get the original Agile manifesto you know all of scrum is bullshit. I am the CTO and Tech lead, I'm just agile and don't use any crap. Know what works : just talk to people, its that simple, and keep the team less than 20 people.

[@wesleyrm]

​@@monad_tcp Fitting username, "monad" lol. Individuality for the win

[@Vendavalez]

At the place I’m working now some people upstairs demand a lot of micro-managing of tasks/tickets/whatever they are called. Like they have to be under the right group with the right tags and the right links and have the right comments and the right number of hours logged into it. IE busywork. Our scrum master would ask us in the morning a couple of quick questions and make sure that all the info was filled correctly for the people upstairs. I guess someone decided that they wanted the salary of the scrum master as a bonus so we no longer have one and have to do all the busy-work ourselves. Sure, it’s not difficult, but I hate it. I used to make jokes about the scrum master too and I cannot express how much I regret it now. I don’t believe that a man can miss another man the way I miss that man.

[@togepyton1688]

I am a former developer who will become a full time Scrum Master soon and I somehow want to become that man you’re talking about for my team 😅

[@lewesc]

When I started watching The Primeagen, it made me feel smart. That ending has me reconsidering that and now I think it's more about the shit posting.

[@Illusion-clock]

he definitely taught me you shouldn't take yourself seriously

[@TheCidraque]

Anyway streaming is shitposting with extra steps, so...

[@georgehelyar]

Scrum is training wheels for agile. A good scrum master can have a huge impact on a team that does not understand agile (even if they say they are doing agile), but the better you get at agile, the less you need a scrum master or scrum.

[@MoonShadeStuff]

Yeah but sometimes you really need that good and experienced Scum Master who can make the team aware of all the awful practices that make them trip over themselves and make for a horrible working atmosphere. Without a great scrum master in that situation all you can do is switch the team.

[@Justin73791]

Explain this stance in detail. I have never seen a good Agile team with or without Scrum, and as a software engineer no part of me believes Agile will ever align to quality development.

[@adriankal]

@@Justin73791ci/cd is agile and almost whole industry is based on that. At least the more successful part of it. Nobody besides gaming studios do waterfall now.

[@darylphuah]

​@@Justin73791 agile is like sex. If you're good at it, you don't need to follow guides. If you don't know what you're doing, the guides (e.g. scrum) isn't going to make it any better.

[@Justin73791]

@@darylphuah Yeah this makes me believe in Agile even less.

[@midhunmanu007]

conjoined triangles of success

[@tc2241]

If you’ve ever had a good scrum master, it’s magical, like lighting striked and led your team to gold. Unfortunately 99% of the time you’re stuck with dollar store PM

[@remigoldbach9608]

I agree with you : the SM needs to do his job and then it's really valuable !

[@potato9832]

Every time SCRUM fails, I'm told it's because it wasn't implemented correctly. It seems to me implementing SCRUM correctly is skating on a razor's edge. It succeeds once in a hundred attempts. I think cowboy coding has a greater success rate.

[@remigoldbach9608]

@@potato9832 the problem is that companies, where I'm living, want to implement scrum but without applying the rules. Just to tell the clients that they are agile. When it fails they blame then scrum, that's a shame. The scrum guide is a good start and explains well the different roles and how you work in a team. People don't want to read and they think they already know how it is supposed to work.

[@zwerko]

@@remigoldbach9608 So, you're saying scrum (and the underlying agile) is like communism, it would totally work if implemented properly. Shame nobody who attempted it didn't go all the way with it...

[@remigoldbach9608]

@@zwerko communism will always fail, but I saw some companies that implemented scrum correctly and it worked...

[@CanadaWaxSolvent]

The scrum master is who ever feels like speaking to the group that morning. I feel like most of these aspirational management concepts just make it so we have layers of ifairweather management.

[@escapegulag4317]

scrum is the healing crystals of tech

[@NorthernRealmJackal]

Except healing crystals actually have a placebo effect on middle aged white women. Also, if my manager was into healing crystals instead of SCRUM, at least the rest of us wouldn't suffer. So imo SCRUM is much worse.

[@chazcheadle]

“They organize meetings and report to middle managers.” tells you all you need to know about them. “I report to the middle managers so developers don’t have to!”

[@chaccmi1358]

Just subbed after watching this masterpiece. A scrum master is the one who works hard at making you despise working in software, a professional sticks in your wheels guru. I have been away from programming for 3 years now, for family reason and other, but now working full force on getting back into it. I am eagerly hoping to join teams where no scrum exists, what sector of software development is less likely to run in scrum teams? embedded? A scrum master is not pointless, on the contrary, he is the one who turn a simple 5 minutes task suchas changing a button's color into a set of stories and task and retros and meetings and synergies. Scrum is awful, turned software engineering into software assembly line.

[@adriankal]

Not sector. Just a few projects where all employees are adults. Scrum master is continuation of kindergarten teacher.

[@chaccmi1358]

@@adriankal I was contracting before my time off. every 6 months a different place, all scrum with no exception. I was mainly doing web, backend, devops, cloud, ci/cd. It seems that sector is all scrum, what else than embedded still runs only on a team of adult engineers doing simply engineering? (and yeah scrum is adult engineering daycare)

[@Provokant]

I have seen it actually work at my last employer. To be fair they were agile coaches and we had no bosses at teamlevel. So their main job was to help the teams organize and to ensure meetings were successful. But the most important point was, we didn't do textbook scrum and never sticked to methology that felt useless.

[@JoeStuffzAlt]

Scrum master is often a lieutenant manager. I have quite a few good scrum masters. The ones that were on multiple teams were very useful to ask "do you know the guy that..." and that scrum master often would help me find that guy. However, how good the scrum master is depends on the company + team together, so if the side(s) are slipping in some way, it does affect the appearance of the scrum master

[@hellglazer]

Updates from each member of a Scrum team in a daily stand up is the best way to waste time. Should be used to align the team for the work being done that day. When it's conversational, it's useful. The 3 questions model is shit.

[@bitwisedevs469]

As someone who is in a dysfunctional organization and was invaded by new cults of agile and scrum this has to be the funniest and most relatable meme I've ever watch. Exactly what is happening to us right now.

[@nilsselbach5660]

now imagine the safe framework and we renamed scrum master to team coach. you cannot image the productivity increase

[@PuntiS]

Job of SM is usually to deal with activity hurdles, but instead what I see them doing the most is agile celebrations and creating new processes for everything.

[@bbsara0146]

a scrum master is basically a shaman for daily standups

[@atti1120]

I once tried to watch a course on scrum, and I kid you not when I say 1 HOUR in and they had still not explained what it was, just praising it for 1 hour. Closed that shit, never looked back

[@NorthernRealmJackal]

Oh it's mostly horseshit, don't get me wrong. But that's exactly why you convince your company to let you get those certificates, so you can get your foot in the door, and then do the job however the f you like. No-one can say you're not being "agile", so long as you let the team "self organise" (i.e. don't apply any policies or workflow rules at all). My current biggest dream is to become a scrum master, and get paid to _not_ intervene with the actual work being done.

[@atti1120]

@@NorthernRealmJackal nice 😂

[@lapieuvreee]

I had once a scrum mater that actual improved the team. BUT this was a short terme job, he basically help us setup a good workflow process to improve our response and delivery time. and then it was done and he moved to another team. (also this team was the best I ever had, everyone was proactive and responsible. i'm pretty sure when the time is full of people that don't really care the job may take longer)

[@MiracleRecliner505]

That’s how it’s supposed to be because a good scrum master will make sure they aren’t “needed” hence why some people say it’s not a job but a role.

[@MosiurRahman-dl5ts]

Maybe the real scrum masters were the friends we made along the way.

[@tonydejesus3774]

Our scrum master basically fills out user stories and rides devs asses to actually use the board so we can complain (with numbers) that were understaffed

[@NorthernRealmJackal]

Nice of your scrum master to do the POs job and babysit a bunch of adults.

[@Illusion-clock]

I feel like I'm losing so much braincell since I joined a scrum / safe company...

[@rokker333]

Run Forrest, run.

[@JohnDoe-sq5nv]

SAFe isn't Scrum just because they stole some of its vocab.

[@JellyMyst]

My understanding is the scrum master is supposed to be in charge of things like keeping meeting on schedule and topic, managing backlog, and doing all the other menial Scrum tasks that nobody wants to do. The team I work in has the team manager doubling as scrum master.

[@jl6723]

My problem with Scrum Masters is that I have no idea what the ideal usage of them is supposed to be or look like. Are they supposed to be a team-Secretary, a cross-team communicator (why not just slack other team), an inventory-manager, purchase-maker, team mascot, overseer for management, witness, legal requirement, documentation generator, odd job worker, etc… I have no idea what this person is supposed to do. In such a case, I feel that I can hardly judge them. And when I ask, I get no answers which makes me suspicious.

[@tc2241]

When done correctly they plan GOOD meetings, foster communication between teams, handle comms from PMs, ensure tickets are properly groomed/broken down before they’re ever assigned, prevent staleness, reduce noise so that engs can focus on deliverables, manage priorities/backlog/board, maintain velocity, reduce/groom backlog, manage team schedules/assignments, and ensure bugs/features delivered are aligned with prod needs. When you get a GOOD scrum master, it’s one of the coolest things ever. It’s like having team agent/secretary/hype man/bouncer who understands your codebase and is highly protective of its image, health, and quality. Unfortunately most companies find a rando, toss em into a scrum cert course, and they come out and schedule dailies asking for updates and hour long retros. It’s unlikely you’ll have a real scrum master let alone be truly agile at most companies. Dont get me started on “DevOps”, which is a methodology, not a position

[@CreativeMining413]

​​​@@tc2241I agree with most of what you said except the codebase part. I've had three different Scrum Masters in my career (some were good, others were bad) at various companies and only one of them cared about the health of the codebase because he happened to be the engineering manager (this is not the norm and they are usually separate people) so when they do care, they only care to the extent it impacts deliverables during the sprint. And it makes sense too because they're not developers, they shouldn't care about that.

[@lukasz96]

"(why not just slack other team)" because sometimes, the other team jsut goes "f off" without saying it this directly but still making it a huge pain in the ass to actually get things done. A good agiel coach is a good mediator and when you need one, you are thankful that there is someone out there fighting your wars for you. They have the authority that the team itself lacks (in certain situations, obv)

[@timgwallis]

People talk about meetings a lot when discussing Scrum Masters, but meeting facilitation is actually the least valuable thing that they can do with their time. The ideal usage of a Scrum Master is jumping on top of removing anything that slows the team down. This includes acute things like waiting on access to a system from Site Reliability, or systemic things like a process challenge or lack of strong technical standards around how API’s are setup / used, for example. I find it peculiar when folks bring up situations in which Scrum Master being on the team slowed things down when it’s literally their job to aide in speeding things up. If this is labeled a skill issue, though, then people parrott back the “Scotsman, Communism, and Agile are always perfect but never done right” response. So whatever, people are going to use the skill issues of these shitty people to paint everything with a broad brush. Technologist are spending all day thinking about solving technical problems, Product people are spending all day solving product problems, you meed someone focused on process problems. That’s supposed to be the Scrum Master.

[@lukasz96]

@@timgwallisTBF, a good scrum master will eliminate unneccessary meetings and still faciliate the good ones left.

[@wubabie13]

I am a scrummaster. I am full of energy and everyone loves me, but being that I have no value other than scheduling "mental health check" meetings to talk about plants and dogs, --- im super upset after watching this and need to reevaluate my life. Just kidding guys. Keep on working, you are doing great! Happy Friday, don't forget to reach out in teams if you have any questions!!!

[@shesssosavvy]

This is so unhinged. I think its important to know if a team really needs a scrum master OR project manager. In my organization, I'd tried to not hound people for updates and hover over their daily workings. The irony - they wanted me to do that. They are super busy, and really see the value in having an SM there and involved.

[@Pjiwm]

I'm the scrum master without the s and r in scrum.

[@linaamuliah7513]

😂

[@wpelfeta]

Scrum masters are awesome. They set up and start meetings and they take meeting notes. All stuff I don't like to do.

[@hardcorecode]

Sounds like a glorified secretary to me!

[@seinfan9]

Is that a job worth as much as a staff level software engineer?

[@MegaMage79]

I wish scrum masters could take notes. In my company they are not competent enough to understand the meeting content to make notes

[@jmastaice]

That’s interesting, your scrum master does 2 more things than mine.

[@lukasz96]

@@MegaMage79Yup, that's bad. I am very, very lucky with my current agile team coach/scrum master because dude is knowledgable around the agile framework AND the whole company so actually the teams he supports go to HIM to get more info, needed context, new updates from other parts of the company that could affect your own work. Like I said in another comment, it's sadly a huge hit and miss and there are definitely many scrum masters who can't do shit. Had a few like that myself before, too.

[@ursafrankgaming]

Every conversation I've heard about scrum masters leading their scrums sound like a bad Rick and Morty bit

[@EdwardPike]

I had a good one at Nike. She worked on multiple teams. She was really focused on blockers from other teams or depts and would work with mgt high enough up to knock heads. She helped move the standups along.

[@i-see-right-through-you]

I don't do team stand-ups ... I do individual sit-downs and my team WORKZZZ!!!!

[@BryonLape]

Scrum master is a role, but a position. The "certified" ones perpetuate the problems.

[@thewiirocks]

I remember taking Scrum training back in the day. The company that was offering the CSM was providing a Pass-Pass test since you did the training. That's right, it was not possible to fail the test!

[@zaofactor]

Exactly, the scrum master role is normally supposed to be taken by a PM or a BA. It's not It's own job by itself.

[@muneebahmad5780]

I was asked by team to be a scrum master for the team (as I have not much knowledge) and I did not know what it was so I wanted to know and now I saw this.

[@doctorgears9358]

We have a scrum master who is basically just the PM and does all the communicating with the client rofl. Dude does the Lord’s work attending their meetings and then distilling them to the rest of the team in slack messages.

[@xTriplexS]

I'm gonna say this again. Can't spell scrum without scum.

[@sergeantsausage2609]

I'm a scrum master and set my company I work with the PO and PM to unblock features. Our work spans across multiple fields (iot devices, cloud backend, front end) and I basically have a very big picture understanding of everything something will entail. If the feature is not feasible in the deadline we're given, I work with UX and managers to figure out a compromise. It feels like a big jumbled mess, and I constantly feel guilty for not doing much coding (although I still do fix bugs and the occasional story). I don't think I'm a conventional scrum master, more like a generalist that figures out a good compromise between customer requirements, UX, and devs. The job is exhausting and I hate it.

[@roylink]

You do sound like you actually have an impact on your team and understand what your team is working on. My Scrum Master is a nice person but doesn't really understand what we work on. Any communications outside the team are just handled by the engineers. I feel like my SM is just there to make sure the numbers look good.

[@SkaterBlades]

I remember being taught scrum in college and just thinking "why would i want to waste my time meeting every day, or multiple times a day and working out point values for my tasks over doing actual work" My manager loves scrum and now i have to update like 3 trackers when i go for a shit

[@NorthernRealmJackal]

Some of my colleagues are currently on a project with 3 daily "check-ins" where they have to report what they intend to do until the next check-in (2.5hrs later). Every check-in takes between 5 and 55 minutes, depending on whether the SM and PM and CTO have some details to work out, while everyone else just sorta hang out, and then the check-in ends with an obligatory "let's be efficient, you guys!" You'd think we're trying to scam some client, but these are actually internal projects, with very direct oversight by the CTO. Needless to say, I'm not that envious.

[@andrewbishop869]

Scrum masters are great resources for finding out where the best coffee shops and places for lunch are near by

[@philippgampe8120]

I lost it when he started making dolphin noises 😂

[@MichaelLazarski]

The point of a scrum master is to come into a team that does not do scrum and then set the team up to have all the stuff scrum does and then only consult if the team needs it. I dont know when this changed to be a full position in one team forever.

[@errrzarrr]

Seems like everyone have forgotten the point is to develope software... Well, in fact, is to deliver a product the company can cash in. But no, the point of a Scrum master is to do SCRUM RITUALS, day in, day out, to be a hurdle in the way to delivering a successful product.

[@QCAlpha-212]

I like how Prime will eventually lose his mind on every video. Reminds you how insane every great mind can be at one point.

[@sapkra]

The scrum master is the feel-good manager of the team.

[@havlli7544]

Prime got his old hair back?! Lets go! Future is bright people!

[@salazar1554]

From your description I think the scrum master is supposed to be like the team mascot. Similar to the small fluffy animal that appears in anime sometimes.

[@as_below_so_above]

Prime calling scrum masters the dolphins of the team made me spit my drink 😂😂😂

[@seriousjan5655]

Scrum master is basically your pastor.

[@potato9832]

SCRUM master is the neighbor asking you if "Is it hot enough for you?" on a hot summer day.

[@seriousjan5655]

@@potato9832 Well, no. If you read the Manifesto, Scrum master is something like couch and referee in one person, dealing with applying scrum and keeping scrum running correctly, adressing correct people, resolving methodic issues and obstacles. And adding more redundant paperwork ...

[@Fanaro]

3:35 What a legendary take from chat.

[@breezycodes]

😂😂😂 the dolphin noise killed me

[@SKULDROPR]

The soft loungy jazz in the bg really does it for me

[@SharunKumar]

”Pretty sure this chat is MIT" 😂

[@BatPierrot]

I literaly saw the difference when the scrum left my project. Nobody had no idea who was doing what. A new dev joined the team and nobody knew if he even had a PC and access to the project. That's also the scrum's job.

[@BatPierrot]

Devs: "scrumasters are dumb, lol" Also, devs: 5:32

[@moristar]

As a former uncertified Scrum Master I totally support this message.

[@bitwize]

The last time I worked on a team with a Scrum Master, she was an Indian lady who looked a lot like Priyanka Chopra. My wife (who listened onto our Teams meetings when we went remote) said she had a very pleasant voice. So she was nice to be around... but yeah, didn't exactly turbocharge productivity. Mainly made sure we were being good little scrummers, and cheerled Scrum when it was becoming increasingly clear Scrum was sapping us more than helping us.

[@ultimaq8730]

In my experience the only asset they bring is that i don't have to deal with customers anymore.

[@errrzarrr]

Do you really drank the cool aid they deal with customers? 🤧

[@dinov5347]

I would torment my former scrum master by saying 1 story point is 1 hour. So every time he asks me on how many story points for a task, I would say 5 story points since it will take me 5 hours to complete.

[@MoonShadeStuff]

That makes no sense whatsoever. If you know how many hours you need you don’t need a methodology that handles uncertainty in the process, you just have to draw a Gantt chart.

[@BryonLape]

Scrum + Jira = Software Development Hell. It's what too many businesses believe works.

[@theodorealenas3171]

I know one person who likes Jira a lot. He's the biggest jackass I've seen in my 22 years of life, and got promoted at work almost immediately. Coincidence?

[@luxusAI]

5:40 best part

[@jerrystudent7039]

I worked for a banking group and scrum masters were the highest paid jobs there. Funny enough, they did nothing but setting up meetings, doing power point presentations, organizing team-building games (that annoyed everyone) - and yes they didnt understand the business side of things nor the tech side of things. Usually when you failed as a consultant/business analyst or developer , they asked you if you are interested in becoming a scrum master... yes, you heard me right. If you failed at your job you got promoted to scrum master with a higher salary than before. I never had as many non-sense meetings as in this particular banking group, they were living the textbook scum to the extreme. It was a religion. Around 8hours per week in all kinds of scrum-religion-related meetings.

[@ExpertOfNil]

Big Ace Ventura vibes there at the end

[@jjpp3301]

I once was appointed as a scrum master for a project I did that grew tremendously.... the short story is that the team never had a scrum master

[@ezydidit]

So many organizations work in a Waterfall environment and don't realize how ineffective that is. Waterfall is hiring smart people and telling them what to do vs Agile is being efficient through the incite of working with people. You hire smart people and empower them to tell you how get to a technical solution. Tell people what you want and scrum masters facilitate that process of planning, resolving issues, and delivering value. You'd be surprised of how many people that are technically proficient that don't have the personable qualities to understand what the end user wants and how to work with a team to get there.

[@TheEtherea]

Waterfall actually works and can be very efficient long-term. It depends however on what sort of market the company is in. One of the companies I worked with had a major software project done in Waterfall and it worked perfectly, because their market is so stagnant itself you are never late anywhere, nothing changes over the course of a single year. This way you can have 3 months sprints, proper detailed UML documentation, proper testing without pushing on prod half baked untested code and it leads to long-term a very stable piece of software. What Waterfall does horribly is deal with a dynamic environment, where we i.e. sold internet ads on a large scale and changes would happen every next month. New integrations, new products, new types of analytics bs or whatever else. In that scenario Waterfall does not work and is inefficient. We used Agile and we had tons of bugs here and their, tests on prod (no time all asap), system crashes after releases and so on, but it was fine. "Sorry, we will be back in 2-3 hours back online, don't worry" were the magic words.

[@spudboy007]

LilJehu is so on point with every video he has

[@ahmedw5]

5:44 hahahahahaha the absolute best 'agen ending

[@wertigon]

Being stuck as an actual scrum master, I would like to help on the code base but I get called in to meetings all the time, half of them not announced, so getting actual work done is pretty much a bust. I try to mitigate this by doing as much boring and administrative tasks as possible so my team members do not have to, facilitate discussion between team members and once in a blue moon actually help with technical decisions. You know, as much as possible keep the crap away so the rest of the team can do their job! Oh, and actually try to restructure parts of the code that have grown stale and outdated. But that often requires more unbroken time than unplanned meetings allow for, I am lucky if I get 2 hours unbroken to actually do work on... :D

[@mohammaddh8655]

history teacher : how did you stooped the WWII time traveler : i introduced hitler to agile scrum

[@ruturajingale7913]

When he started making dolphin noises it hit me, I am learning DSA from this guy. Weird times mannn!!!!

[@blipojones2114]

"Tech twitter is the worst ever....." (proceeds to make dolphin noises).

[@SpookaTroopa]

The dolphin noise was weirdly accurate 😆

[@HalfMonty11]

5:31 might be the most Dr Disrespect thing you've ever done

[@LengCPP]

Scrum master? That sounds like my dream job

[@ccaprini39]

Scrum masters should be a senior dev who doesn't want to do it. It's like the chaperone for a boy scout trip, it should never be any of the people raising their hands saying "oooh, ooh, let me do it!!" Should always be a senior dev who doesn't want to do it.

[@Ferdziosz]

The problem with most scrum masters is, they are enforced to introduce a set amount of rules, metrics and workflows because "thats how we scrum in our organisation". Their supervisor comes in and says" your team needs to create three more metrics this months", and then they do a "post-daily" meeting to brainstorm new metric ideas "so we can be more effective". Just for the sake of it. They want to create tasks, so you dont forget to create the actual task, or a story for a feature you by any means necessary HAVE TO complete in one sprint. Or it becomes worthless. I literally had a scrum master say "the work you do over the span of two sprints is worthless. because you didnt do it in one". Scrum master's job is to train the team so they do not need him anymore. Yet somehow everyone has a scrum master all the time

[@errrzarrr]

I've been saying this for a while. Seems like the purpose of a developer's team is to do Scrum rituals according to Scrum values, day-in day-out. No. We are here to deliver software. In fact, to deliver value for the business/clients. Clients don't care if you are abiding by sacrosanct scrum values or how many scrum ceremonies you did this week. Business don't care either

[@gliong666]

TheScrumTime

[@sb_dunk]

The Scrumagen

[@phil7121]

In my experience good scrum masters are valuable in large beurocratic organizations where devs get pulled in many directions by many different engineering managers from various departments who all feel their project is P0 Scrum masters should be good at playing office politics and be willing to stand between devs and people outside the dev team

[@remboldt03]

I don't even know what scrum masters do. It sounds like an insult: "you scrum"

[@u9vata]

I knew a certified scrum master who were doing 3 hour long daily standups every day. Probably would be longer if 9-12 would not hitt lunchtime this way haha. PS.: I also saw scrum really working too once - but no one was certified for it, just looked at their manifesto and things and we did it. Also daily meetings literally was 5 minute because we measured it with stopwatch haha. But it was battle room style project where we did not have time for bullshit, so all bullshittery were not happening from scrum, all good parts like involving client and being very transparent team-wise for blocking things were... then it worked.

[@rokker333]

I do not know what iis worse: Scrum Master or DevOps. Hmm, ok, Scrum Master.

[@elie3423]

As a PM, My career started as a scrum master for 2 years then after graduation I became a full stack developer worked for 3 years and in the meantime i took courses to be a PM. Now here I am. A PM 😊 When i was a scrum master, my job was to 1. make sure everyone is doing there tasks starting from highest priority. 2. schedule meetings with multiple teams and prepare the topics of discussion. 3. QA some features after developers put it in QA. 4. Daily standup with team

[@da-voodoo-shuffle]

Scrum masters sound like underpaid team leaders

[@gergelynemeth8244]

Greatest outro so far 😂

[@88guernica]

My current scrum master is also our teams dedicated QA.

[@cesarlapa]

Mr. Primeagen, I used to think you were wrong about your take on scrum and agile, but today I was told that an SQL select statement would take two months to be delivered, because the cycles are a month long and this month's was already closed... A simple select statement that I could do in 10 minutes...

[@ThePrimeTimeagen]

:) Agile seems great on paper and i believe it can work from time to time. but like all human based projects... it gets really slow and bogged down and eventually a dumb select statement takes 2 months

[@CHURCHISAWESUM]

The funny thing about this is that it’s not even that mean or unreasonable. Net impact being zero already puts you in the top half of any company that has “scrum masters”: most employees there are probably net negatives.

[@FizzlNet]

I'm a scrum master. I think the ceremonies are waste of time. Why can't we be just ...normal? Like, call up a meeting when we need to collaborate and plan ahead. Work on stuff from backlog at your own pace. Close the tickets and inform others. Arrange meetings with other when you need them, instead of waiting for some magical pre-arranged meeting to bring up your concerns. (Oh yeah, I'm actually a productive developer in the team. Not _just_ a scrum master. That would be soul crushing)

[@JohnDoe-sq5nv]

Well, first of all the Scrum meetings aren't ceremonies, never is that word used in the Scrum guide, but supposed to be productive meetings. So if you find that they aren't, why not cancel them? Try it! See if it works better. If you don't need to have them, then don't have them. Regarding waiting for a pre-arranged meeting, I guess you are talking about the sprint planning? The sprint is meant to be a mini project where the outcome is something you can deliver as a package to the customer. So you start with a feature ("We want to give the customer the ability to do X") and set it as sprint goal (i.e. purpose of project), and then either create or bring in already defined backlog items that will fulfill the goal (when I was a PO my sprint plannings never took more than 15 minutes because we had in advance always defined what work would be needed in the future. As a PO I also made it clear that the only estimation I ever cared about was if the team believed the project was doable within the timeframe or not, I gave not a rat's ass about points so the team stopped doing detailed estimations and it worked better). But if what you are working with doesn't make sense to organize in projects this way. For example you are working on too many different things to where the sprint goal just becomes "do stuff" everytime, then Scrum makes no sense. If you deliver software to the customer more often than what the sprint says, then Scrum makes no sense. If you can't deliver software as often to the customer, then Scrum can maybe still make sense if you are smart about it. If it doesn't make sense to review your projects with the customer (or stakeholders) at regular intervals the size of the sprint length, then Scrum doesn't make sense. An organization should only use Scrum if it makes sense. They should modify their WoW to fit the products they are making, not trying to force their products into the Scrum WoW.

[@Bizza12345]

you think of the scrum master as a job. if theres one thing ive learnt its often not just a job, its a lifestyle for these people

[@errrzarrr]

Seems like everyone have forgotten the point of a team is to develope software... well, in fact, is to deliver a software product the company can cash in. But no, the point of a Scrum master is to do SCRUM RITUALS, day in, day out, to be a hurdle in the way to delivering a successful product.

[@fishingtrippy]

The ending is hilarious 😆