The Life of Death: How a Funeral Director Sends Off a Loved One | Hidden Hustles

What would you say to your loved ones at the end of their lives? “I love you”? “I’ll miss you”?
Not everyone gets a chance to say goodbye, but Jeffrey, a fourth-generation funeral director, helps them to grieve properly. Wendy works with him to understand the ups and downs of funeral planning.
Host:
Wendy (@ohheyitswendy)
Crew:
Pei Fang (@pfdolala)
Ben (@benjamin_neo)
Hakim (@_mikahahah)
Merilyn (@meowzhidong)
Tan Tong (@t.antong)
Jialing (@jialinng)
Syabil (@sy.riz)
Christine (@christinemakingthings)
Terese (@tereselim)
Editor:
Ian (@eyeteesavvy)
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[@OGS.Official]

Interested in seeing some behind-the-scenes content? Watch us chat with the producers and hosts of Hidden Hustles here: kzbin.info/www/bejne/bmW4XqOfaMeIsJI

[@emoworlds]

I just lost my mum to cancer a few days ago and we had a Buddhist ritual for her. This video brings some closure to my heart. Thank you OGS for documenting this.

[@user-oh6wb5rj2q]

May she rest in peace. My condolence

[@emilylouiseparker9362]

so sorry for your loss x

[@user-jy2cj9tp5y]

I lost my mum four weeks ago due to natural causes which was pleasing as she passed in her sleep and she wants a direct cremation as three of my sisters did nothing for her and if it wasn't for my brother living with her and me going over especially when I took my youngest daughter to see her she'd have no one but ironically she passed on one of my sisters birthday and is being cremated on another one.god bless you mum now you're with dad.😢❤xxx

[@yurienna]

My grandmother passed away in her sleep over a month ago, and we held a Taoist funeral for her. She was only 65 and we didn't expect her to leave us so suddenly. For the past 26 years she had been working really hard and making sacrifices to raise my father and his three other siblings, while my grandfather left due to gambling issues. Her last words to me were about congratulating me for being promoted to Sec 4. My family and I were able to give her a proper send-off at Mandai Crematorium. This video has definitely given me a brief insight into the job scopes of a funeral director. Utmost respect to all the funeral directors out there!

[@dominique-valois]

I grew with a narcissist mother who was so abusive and neglectful of her children. When my mother died two years ago, I did not give a shit as to what would be done with my mother's body. If it were entirely up to me, I would have just thrown the body into a dumpster. But I had to play it cool, and did what society expected. So most of what I did for the funeral was not for the deceased, but to put on a show for the living.

[@OGS.Official]

I'm sorry to hear that. I can't imagine what it must have been like for you growing up in such a stressful environment. While Jeffrey didn't mention it in the video - because he felt that it's not his place to share these personal accounts on behalf of the family members whom he served - he shared with us that different families have different dynamics and as a funeral director, he needs be acutely aware of it and read the room fast, especially in his line of work where emotions are bound to run high. I have to admit, I grew up in an average family where it would be hard for me to relate to your experiences and I do recognise that as a privilege. Filial piety is something that is expected so much from us that it must not have been an easy journey for you through these years. But I hope that at the very least, you will be able to make peace with yourself one day. - Pei Fang, producer

[@sarahhajarbalqis]

@@OGS.Official Pei Fang. This channel passes through my timeline by chance. Truly appreciate the compassion, empathy and non-judgment in your response to a difficult emotion shared by the viewer.

[@donnamccann3203]

yes I will be exactly like yourself ,, if i have to give a speak I will be saying my grandmother said if I did not have any thing good to say , say nothing at all , walk off

[@eileenstehr7680]

Mine was a “ Perfectionist Mom”!! Everything had to be So Perfect, cause she was not going to “ make herself look “ bad” to others! I cried a little bit, but after the Cemetery, went back to the church, and, basically, “ forgot” abt the day, and had a total diff feeling, as if no Funeral day! If someone who knows me, and reads this, will be a bit shocked at what I’m writing! My husband said later,” I finally, have my Wife back”!

[@lzh4950]

Reminds me of when the EU refused the request of N Korea's ambassador to have a minute of silence back in UN's General Assembly back in 2011 when Kim Jong Il passed on

[@lawrenceng1743]

Thank you OGS. This short video and the last one on being an embalmer really touched me. Thank you for treading on the road less traveled with your stories in humble Singapore. I would love to hear stories of grandparents who had suffered in the past, to give them a voice before they passed on

[@OGS.Official]

Thank you for the kind words! We are glad that these stories that touched our hearts touch yours as well ❤ - Pei Fang, producer

[@shawnhow4163]

Life and death are part and parcel of life, the passage of time, when u grow old, u will look back in your life and everything you have experienced. This is a meaningful video, I have gained insight on this industry and learnt to appreciate and respect their profession.

[@meowsyy]

Beautifully edited piece and such 'quiet' and emotional storytelling.

[@yutacgino]

Thanks for letting us know more about this. My dad left us so suddenly that all of us were shocked and didn't take time to realise how his last journey was. This helped us to know he was well taken care of and respected for the lifelong journey he put efforts to go through, his love for us and life around him 🙏

[@808kaneohepride8]

Thank you for treating them with respect and not just another customer. I've experienced a funeral home that just treated my loved one as just another customer. I was sooooo hurt but there wasn't anything I could do.

[@heidimarie1198]

Just a big thumbs up. I have no words. Apart from respect.

[@abc-pz6xp]

Kudos to OGS to be able to capture this emotionally-involving job so succinctly. Truly an insightful video! Keep it Up OGS!

[@OGS.Official]

Credit also goes to the profile who is so open to sharing his journey on a less treaded path! - Pei Fang, producer

[@shensterng]

So beautiful and meaningful.... thank you for doing this ❤

[@mainesobari]

my grandfather loved coffee his entire life, everytime we go over to pay respect i’ll remember to make coffee and offer it, even though i’m christian i would go and bow in respect and clean everything up after, even bring joss stick

[@OGS.Official]

Actually, Jeffrey did share with us off-camera on how families with different religions might have differing opinions on how to conduct the funeral of their loved ones and sometimes, it's just very hard to reach a consensus. So it's nice to know that you and your family have such an open and tolerating view to hold the funeral to properly send off your grandfather :) - Pei Fang, producer

[@itzSoonz]

nice video! well documented

[@LadySymphora]

This is so touching to see 😢

[@rutaiwanwongsirasawad4040]

Such a beautiful soul you are.

[@KathleenMoore-fr5fm]

Loved this. We're all people ❤

[@fireplace92]

It's not an easy job. My salute for this young man.

[@fiesta142]

i have no family left and have opted for a no frills cremation. Gosh i hope I’m treated with the respect that is shown here even if no one is in attendance i still deserve a respectful exit

[@user-mf5ll4kf6p]

I'm in the same boat as you and hope that I will also be treated with respect.

[@beverlylumley4150]

Beautiful video thank you Canada

[@SazaKiba]

Thank you.😢

[@jejepchannel6590]

What a great content ! thank you OGS team, (from Indonesia) ❤️

[@OGS.Official]

Thank you! It's nice to know that there are people supporting us from another part of the world 🥺 - Pei Fang, producer

[@kangchanyeol]

Should have more of such episode like the previous one shown on Channel 5 few years ago

[@zahidharrishah]

just wanna say here..He so dashing 😻

[@janicetan4626]

"The greatest project we have is life"

[@jellybeanwithwings]

Damn this video got me.

[@michellecollins-betz736]

When we had the funeral for my late nan it was done with so much effort they made the whole day go so well, it's the dignity that the staff showed. At the height of emotions the staff were extremely helpful, kind, they even stayed for a while with us. That was three years ago.

[@piercelang4571]

@ 1:8. Dudes like, “yeah fuck we’ll do it for free.” Followed by blank expressionless smile.

[@babymonster007]

Me thinking and planning to join this kind of jobs too as a freelance But unfortunately in SG doesn't have much girl doing this job actually I also have some friends/colleagues working this job too I actually play a part of funeral job as a chinese traditional peformace which i performance chinese traditional instrument music for them This guys such kind hearted person 🙏🏼i hope i can join his company too can i know his company as at which part of Singapore?

[@hunter-kv2zw]

Director Jeffrey handsome man

[@josephsingapore8742]

Good bye my parents..

[@wendyshoowaiching4161]

You can't be personally be emotional when you are dealing with dead perfessionally. Less noise is better. Open prayers music. Cause the dead still hears even the body is still. Usually after 3 days, after the cremation, the spirit has gathered and comes out from the body will moves on next journey. Dealing with no no money or budget. To save money, normally keep the body 2 days and 3rd day claim from cold storage hospital cold storage, buy eco cardboard coffin (put body in) and send direct to crematorium to be cremated, Ash in bags and rent a boat to be spread in the sea.

[@jessicaregina1956]

I say "so long and thanks for all the fish"

[@sar983]

❤

[@zaidanaldzakir2008]

Aqiss And Family 👼

[@deadghost1964]

Located?

[@CambodianPeaches]

🙏🙏🙏

[@angelaangela1509]

Viata vine la pachet cu moartea spunea cineva iar cultul mortilor si funeraliile acestora eu cred ca trebuie respectate chiar daca citeodata nu am fost in bune relatii cu cel decedat nu conteaza religia tara sau statutul social exista compasiune si suferinta🙏🙏🙏🙏

[@CC-pz4el]

🙏 🤲

[@happylees]

Honestly, what does 'OGS' stand for?

[@sarahthepotato6727]

"Our grandfather story" I think

[@OGS.Official]

What is the last thing you wished you could have said to your loved ones?

[@drnthe]

A big hug, no words

[@mainesobari]

i wished i cldve sent my aunt off in her final journey, but i had class… sometimes i wished i went for the final journey and not just go for class, education is important but i love family more

[@theunraveler]

Hail Hydra

[@OGS.Official]

@@mainesobari Condolences to you and your family. I empathised with you on the regret of not being able to send your loved ones away on their last journey as I have been in a similar position. But I'm sure your aunt will understand 🥺 - Pei Fang, producer

[@robinzaruraijin]

My dad, I'm sorry to him

[@isabellacicchetti6058]

It's crazy how Christian religion is only one of many options in this business, in a confusing funerary ritual.

[@sirianndugvudys6850]

In China loved ones got sent off by a girl called Hu Tao

[@LuciferMorningstar-ix3lb]

What if the devil work as funeral director 🤔

[@simplyeason]

ngl, jeffery is kinda...

[@badboi888]

Please declare your income tax honestly.

[@yogitraderz7917]

Not your problem .. Well When your turn to cremate properly they might declare ..”💯😊

[@eileenstehr7680]

Hopefully, they have Accepted JESUS into their HEARTS!!

[@deathofthedammed6571]

Let people freely choose

[@joelkumar2853]

What a numnut

[@terencelim9889]

Self righteous Christian..zzzz

[@joegoldberg8533]

@@terencelim9889nothing “self righteous” about accepting Jesus. In fact it is the exact opposite in that we acknowledge we need a perfect savior to atone for our sins. If we thought we “earned” it, that would be self righteous. The fact that someone Hope’s they accepted Christ is a hope that they accepted the gist of salvation. A Christian that is a true Christian that does not speak up would not care about others going to hell. When a Christian speaks up it is out of love for the soul that they want saved. I know we may not agree but please understand that many times this is out of good heart. Not always, but oftentimes.

[@terencelim9889]

@@joegoldberg8533can't agree with Christians who say that only through their way leads to heaven and the rest will be condemned to hell........that's self righteous belief...

[@yogitraderz7917]

Respect…❤️

[@zaidanaldzakir2008]

@rekaputri .official 🕊

[@trinhluong4401]

🙏🙏🙏