The most personal story I've ever told you

[@teresacavanaugh3808]

I love the age of "I don't care". It's amazing and freeing!

[@chillathomemom]

YES!! My 40s are my "I don't care" era and I'm here for it.

[@jojo-tl5ei]

Wow, that was a powerful dream. Thanks for being so real and honest with your feelings.

[@michellemayes3681]

I had my son and 11 months later I had my twins so I know how hard it is to have them so close in age! Then when my twins were 10 I had my daughter and had the worst postpartum. It got so bad I checked myself into a mental hospital and found a good support group. What saved me is finding Jesus, HE saved my life!

[@marydumois4242]

Amen!

[@susanderk1724]

🙏🙏

[@denisespicks122]

Beautiful story- thank you for sharing. We all Love you ❤

[@josiejojo33]

Ashley, I am LOVING these personal, longer chats from you! Thank you for continuing to share your story with us🫶

[@chillathomemom]

Thank you so much!! I am so touched people are choosing to watch and sort of can't believe it 😂 but I'm very grateful. Thanks for being my friend and hanging out with me!

[@ellasullivan7062]

So glad you are feeling better , take care of yourself . Love both of your channels🙏🏾

[@Vicki-u4k]

Late to the party here, but after my second child, I had the worst post-partum depression. It lasted 2 years. I didn’t realize it until I started giving up sugar and all processed foods and had a spell of what felt like the flu for a couple of days(toxins(?) leaving my body), but after that it was like a huge black cloud lifted from me. I can’t describe the feeling, but it felt so good. I am prone to depression and staying away from foods that affect me helps so much. Hope this helps someone.

[@chillathomemom]

I have totally felt like I should adjust my diet and I know it would help in all areas of my life! Occasional treats are life-giving but not all the time. I could definitely fuel better and this is great advice!

[@tonya6396]

We had 4 and thought we were done, but we knew the Lord would let us know if we needed to have another. More than 7 years after our last was born, we felt impressed to have another. It was scary, and we had our first miscarriage during this time, but we trusted in the Lord. Our 5th is now a crazy, adorable toddler. We adore her. She has brought even more joy and love into our family. We are constantly just in awe that she is part of our family, and we can't imagine life without her. People probably tire of me talking about our story, but it sounds like you can relate. It's hard to understand how these extra special little ones bless your family unless you've experienced it firsthand. 😊

[@rustyrose1960]

Thanks for sharing Ash. I am 44 and just had my first baby. Dr. Told me for years that I could not have a baby. I had 2 miss carriage and was thinking it would never happen for me. On my husband’s birthday last year we had the talk if we would try again. I was a little worried since I had two miss carriages but I knew in my heart I still wanted a child. That February I got pregnant again. I got my baby girl. She is adorable and amazing. Now I am thinking I want 1 more and can’t get it out of my head. I am so blessed to have my daughter and I love her very much. However I feel like you felt that there is one more that wants to join our family. Thank you for sharing. Your kids are so cute.

[@thetimelessrosevintage9963]

You created this channel to have an outlet with no walls & no agenda, so it's ok to ramble & be raw. Most of us connect with that ❤ And God talks to us through our dreams & that's why they say to go to bed with a clear mind, so He can communicate with us. All your boys are so precious & have been created for something great! But I believe, that sweet little dimpled boy is destined for something special. That's why it was so important to have him. You are truly blessed & an inspiration to Mom's out there. Family def doesn't have to be blood! We are here for you! 😊

[@chillathomemom]

Thank you, that means the world to me! I love that I can just talk with my friends (and family!) casually on this channel and just have some fun without the pressure!

[@tessa.robles.84]

Thanks for sharing, Ash. I'm 40, and unfortunately, despite always believing I'd be a mom, I've really been grieving lately that it will never happen for me. I have stage 4 endometriosis and have suffered severe pain from it since 15 yrs old. I did extensive fertility treatment in my 1st marriage and it just isn't in the cards. I'm going through my 2nd divorce and at one of the lowest points in my life, but just hearing stories like yours and watching ur videos brings me peace and joy. Thanks again! ✌️💜

[@marydumois4242]

Adoption….

[@Sandra___P]

I'm so sorry for your pain. Please remember that while we may want to carry a baby, sometimes it just doesn't happen. Know that you don't have to carry a child to be a mom. There are tons of kids that need a good foster home for a short time or to adopt. If your heart speaks to being a mom, even with your hard times now, look into opening your home for a child who needs help. It would help you both heal. Sending hugs. You got this!

[@kimkurey89]

Wow!!! That story is amazing!!! And you light up and glow when you tell it...even though you are sick. Love your authenticity!

[@boring.doerings]

PS….I love these “STORY TIMES” please do a story on your life! You can do them is stages? I’m here for it! ❤❤❤❤ your doing exceptionally well and talking about uncomfortable things will actually help you let go easier! 😊

[@jirehscloset7263]

Thank you for sharing your story. Dreams are a powerful tool that God uses to speak to us. So glad you had Crew ❤

[@allisonminten9891]

Love everything you shared thank you. I had our seventh and last baby when I was 42 and I’m not kidding she is the sweetest child ever! Glad we chose to have her. Enjoy your blessings! Good things in life tend to be hard.❤

[@TeresaMarino-m2u]

Thank you for sharing your such a good mom god bless you ❤😊😊😊

[@comedybyanna]

You just gained a lot of my respect by sharing this video!

[@itpatriot]

You are truly precious, Ashley! Know that! And I was just telling my husband this morning how important it is for people to share their struggles and experiences with others…otherwise, what good are we really? I feel that the Lord wants us to serve others this way- to help others know they aren’t alone, or whatever the situation may be. God bless you girl!🙏

[@kbmamaof3772]

I swear it feels like your telling my story. My husband and I have a 17 yr old girl and a 16 yr old boy. I always felt like one was missing. Now I’m 43 having been told at 35 I couldn’t have any more children. I prayed that if someone was missing in my family for God to send them. He did. My 3 year old daughter Chloe was that missing piece. I cannot imagine not having her. The empty feeling I felt immediately went away when she was born. God knows what he’s doing!!

[@boring.doerings]

There is NO shame if we need a little help getting thru tough times! If, medication is needed as it is in many cases…by all means don’t suffer for NO reason! MENTAL HEALTH IS NO JOKE! If you can’t be good for YOU? You can’t be good for your FAMILY! You are pretty amazing girl, don’t doubt yourself! ❤

[@judywilliams8707]

Beautiful story, thanks for sharing!

[@pennydiebolt5987]

As a retired OB RN I thank you for speaking about Postpartum.. so many women struggle and feel shame instead of sharing w professionals and even family and friends. I feel like it's talked about much more than when I started my career and was having kids myself in the 80s and 90s. But still we see in the media how dire and dangerous pp depression can truly be! I guarantee someone will or has seen this and you literally may have saved them. As someone who looks and seems so "put together' for sure you've made them feel less alone. God Bless.

[@kristiwilliams9626]

Your story is so beautiful! Your faith shows through in this video. Our boys are 18 months apart. We are older parents as well. They are now 31 and 33 and are still very close. The older son and wife had our first grand baby a month ago. Talk about a different kind of love. Our other son and wife are due in April. God is good!

[@MountainTopHigh]

I can totally relate to how difficult it is to have young children close together in age. We fostered (then adopted) a sibling group. One day zero kids. The next day a newborn & a toddler. A year later, another newborn. Then an additional 14 months & another sibling was born. 4 kids, ages 4 and under, in less than 4 years. I don’t believe I slept more than a few hours a night for at least 5 years! They’re all in their 20’s now-they really did grow up so fast! But it was definitely TOUGH for a very long time. Feel better soon! Be kind to yourself. You are worthy. ❤

[@Thirdmom-Addison]

Thank you for sharing! You are an inspiration, and beautiful inside and out! 💕💕😊😊

[@GingerMarvin]

Thanks for keeping me company while I treadmill. I love learning more about Ashley ☺️

[@enidpolanco8627]

Ashley I just love you! I watched your video a few years ago where you talked about your upbringing and what you went through and reminded me of what my siblings and I went through and like you we saw what our parents did and decided to break the cycle two of my siblings have masters one in social work the other in education my brother retired from the Maui police department and I was a manager for luxury retailers like Fendi and Barneys New York. When you talked about your father’s passing I felt all the same things you felt, I always thought I would not feel anything when my father passed but I did. I felt the sadness that he died without his children by his side that he missed out in meeting and knowing his grandchildren and that he was released from jail so he could die peacefully in a hospital I cried because of his sad life. You’re such a beautiful soul and so happy for you that you took a different path and created a beautiful family and home.

[@clau2189]

Thank you for sharing…unknowingly this touch me in a very personal way. Just wanted to say thanks for sharing and for reminding everyone that it is okay to not be okay and to ask for help. I think a lot of us here resonate with this story so once again thank you ❤

[@demadurafamily1219]

I love this story! When I was 17 I had a vivid dream of a little baby girl in her crib looking up at me. I forgot about, and then got married in my twenties. Had a son at 27, and then a daughter at 31. And about the time she turned a year I realized it was the same baby. Sometimes God gives us little glimpses of the gifts He has waiting for us ❤

[@cindicarnes1731]

I had my 2 girls i7 months apart. And my youngest was born sick and spent 6 weeks in the NICU. I eally don't remember much about the first year. So crazy. My world was hectic. But they were always so close, and now they are 49 and 50 and the best of friends.

[@annamorreale9458]

You are so sweet and I truly appreciate you and all your honesty. I hope you realize your sharing helps many woman. This is what we as woman need and rally Apple hate you. God bless you and I hope you feel better soon. ❤🙏

[@dawnd6884]

Love that u share your life!!!

[@MOMtreprenuer]

Loving this second channel you have created and your willingness to share your story. I'm so incredibly happy for you and your beautiful family. Thanks for being real❤

[@chillathomemom]

Thank you for watching! I'm amazed anyone is watching tbh 😂

[@melissahodges4439]

Crew is definitely God sent! Bless you and your family.

[@ncowanful]

40 female (reseller) here, this was very sweet, thank you. We just had our first IUI, so hoping to have our first soon.

[@PaulineHolman-wr6wd]

Love this new channel Ash..you're the best. Listening to while doing my chores..❤😊

[@KellyG4729]

I am an older mom too. I had my first at 33 years, my second at 36 years. They kept me young. They're now in their mid 20's. We have such a strong bond. Always remember you are strong! ❤

[@Awren3]

Thank you for opening up to us. I really appreciate your realness. May the Lord keep blessing your family❤

[@suzantherrien3708]

Thanks for sharing you are a beautiful person ❤❤

[@alyssahynick1004]

I had an unplanned pregnancy when my oldest was a year and a half old. I felt so guilty having another baby so soon after my first and was worried it would make him sad that he wasn’t the only baby anymore. My second son was born when my oldest was a couple months shy of 2.5 years old and they love each other so much. It’s amazing watching my oldest be a big brother, and I couldn’t imagine not having my second baby. I relate to you so much!

[@Teambem]

your amazing! My daughter had 2 13 months apart she planned it and wants to have more. I sent her this because your heart is so amazing

[@lebalori]

Wow your dream was amazing it gave me goose bumps. I’m glad you accepted your 3rd child you were meant to have him. He wanted you ❤️🥰 I’m a dreamer too. My dreams would blow your mind.

[@cathyh1309]

I KNEW from my 1st pregnancy & delivery that I was NEVER going to do the "have a child thing" again. It surprised me how committed I was to that given that I wanted at least 2 kids going into the marriage. But it was hard in SO MANY WAYS (and I didnt have a supportive husband; within 2 yrs he'd had an affair and moved out). Glad something told me I was done after one. It just goes to show that if we listen to our hearts and exercise patience, we will generally figure out what is the best choice to make; about most things. My daughter has always been such a blessing to me and I'd have gone through everything every day forever if it meant I got to have her, but to make the choice to have another was an emphatic no and I have no regrets 29 yrs later. All this to say that I'm so proud of you for listening with your heart until you knew the time was right for you and your family.

[@aseedlingsvintage]

I just appreciate you and everything you share. I am trying to build my own business. My husband is in multiple organ failure and we have no income right now. So I appreciate you more than you know. I feel like I learn so much from you! Thank you❤

[@MissPepperss]

Omg how sad, is he able to get transplants?

[@candy123258]

Continuing prayers and positive thoughts for you, hope you feel better soon! ❤ ( I really appreciate all your tips and tricks! I started reselling about 4 years ago, after getting scammed for $450 item my parents health declined and I had to stop, I’m ready to get started again,I just have to start!!!)(Thank you for sharing such a sweet story!!)🤗

[@RebeccaMorris-v6m]

I had a similar experience. Hugs❤

[@cbj23cyn13]

I had my last at 37 and honestly keeping me young. He’s now almost 11 and is the best.

[@chillathomemom]

Yes! I definitely feel like I have to "stay young" to keep up with my boys haha

[@lebalori]

There’s 9 yrs between my second and 3rd. I had Lyme disease and had to wait. I didn’t want to give it to my baby. We did natural family planning then I got pregnant during our classes. We got a refund on our classes because I failed 😂😂 My 3rd is my biggest blessing ever.

[@FortsandSpoons]

I so agonized on going from 1 to 2! I would cry when talking about it, too. Ours are 6 years apart (infertility battles were there for both) but wouldn’t change a thing. Also an older mom so your story really resonates!

[@sandysouthern7940]

Coke Zero! My go-to medicine as well. Lol Feel better soon.

[@YvonThriftyRich]

7UP feels good too...maybe just nostalgic or something?? maybe the lemon?

[@YvonThriftyRich]

Aww Take care Ashley!!!

[@debbiegonzales8035]

Lol. Lalala!. Funny, and cute.

[@marcellaabel-curtis1150]

Oh sister girl I had my first at 17 and my second at 21 and girl girl girl I was so effing messed up after my little girl was born. I was scared for myself. I still don’t know how I got out of that but I did. I adopted another sweet girl at 22 and then crazy ass me decided to have two more at 38 and 41. The 38 and 41 was better thank goodness. Also about the dream… I had a strong knowing that I was gonna have a baby at 40. I just always knew. I believe the same ways you do about that ❤

[@thriftingtiger]

Crewie is the cutest.

[@chillathomemom]

He's a special little guy 🥰

[@sarahkoltz8017]

I remember watching your channel while you were pregnant with Crew. We were trying to conceive at the time and got pregnant around when he was born. 💕 I can't believe he'll be 3!

[@brush412]

I am one of those that have left the door open to a third child. Most days, I feel like absolutely no way! I will be 35 in April and I have 2 boys right now ages 4 (almost 5) and a 20 month old. I had really bad postpartum with both boys. The second one I got help sooner and went to therapy. It does scare me to have a 3rd because I don't have a huge support system. My husband is a disabled vet and struggles mentally himself. But then I think, I could do it all over a third time right? I don't know. I joke with others that my reselling business is my 3rd baby, but I feel like I'm kidding myself. But, I am and will be okay if I don't have a third baby. I just sometimes can't shake the feeling that our family isn't really complete yet. Maybe I will just bring it to the Lord and see what He says about it. We've struggled with our finances most of our married life and that part scares me too. I guess we will see.

[@chillathomemom]

It's definitely a very very personal decision and only you will know if it's right for you! There is no shame in stopping at two beautiful kids and having a happy life! But if you can't shake the feeling, I'd say keep praying and keep pondering on it and see what happens. Maybe it's just not time yet - I was 37 when I got pregnant with Crew and 38 when I had him so you have a couple years yet! Hang in there and I'm with you on how hard this decision is. Sending you a hug, my friend!

[@bevmerr]

Great video.

[@dawnsullivan7325]

clearly crew is a little gift from god!!!

[@rebeccahartshorn7886]

This is not talked about nearly as often as it should be. Post partum depression and anxiety are real, are experienced by a lot more mums than anyone realizes, and can be treated! I didn't realize with my first that I had PPA only until my second was born did I figure out what was going on. You don't have to be in love with your baby immediately. You don't have to have a maternal instinct. So so normal. PS. Canada here. 1 year of paid maternity leave, actually I think its 2 years now, but was 1 when I had my kids. Can be split between both parents.

[@susanvelez6534]

God bless you….. your story is beautiful. Is this a new channel?

[@NeekoZyDyl]

Love that GlamMa, As an older mom too I just turned 46, my son will be 6 in May. Technically he is my adopted son. Bio Mom lives with me/my family while she was pregnant. One afternoon I had fallen asleep, I dreamt that I was holding this little baby and as I looked up baby grew from a baby to a toddler I asked what his name was baaby now toddler replies, My Name is Dylan. I woke up with a gut wrenching feeling that (oddly enough, my baby momma) was not naming the baby correctly. As I'm leaving my room, she was leaving her room and whit sleep crusties still in my eyes I say... You can't name the baby Maliki, His Name Is Dylan. She responded with... He told you huh I said. Yes in my dream. She said he (the baby), tried to tell her the night before, but she had not made up her mind on the name change. So I guess my son named himself while in the womb. And I a straight female now has a baby momma.. 🤷♥️ I love my son. And there are 16 yrs between my daughter and my son. I guess the point is, everything happens for a reason. Thank you for sharing your story.

[@marcellaabel-curtis1150]

Also 😂😂😂 I’m a glama and my 5/2 year olds are aunt and uncle and that to be is so crazy. It feels so odd but I love that

[@michelleschafer8882]

I had my last at 37, he’s now 17 and I’m 55. So not too old! 😆

[@magaAsh]

I had my first and only at 38. Long story with him but he is the most perfect kid I could ever want. I guess he is not a kid anymore as we just celebrated his 28th bday. 😊

[@carrieowens5700]

Total side note but I swear I remember that eBay stopped charging for scheduling listings but I could be wrong.

[@Erin_Wilson_Studios]

❤

[@robert.brokaw3829]

Stay safe.

[@MonicaArispe-px7ui]

❤️❤️❤️❤️

[@miracletimestwo]

I was 36 with my first and 39 with my 2nd. Older moms are cooler!

[@shelleysue4488]

You’re young! I’m 55 with a 10 yo 😅

[@cbj23cyn13]

Hold up! How is Crew 3 already????

[@bellesbottoms]

Six months! That is amazing! Everyone should have that! Dads and moms

[@chillathomemom]

100% agreed!!

[@bellesbottoms]

My fourth was a surprise at 39!

[@chillathomemom]

Wow! Older moms are the coolest, so I'm glad you and I are in the same club! 😆

[@bellesbottoms]

Six months! That is amazing! Everyone should have that! Dads and moms

[@LJesso-c5o]

❤

[@LJesso-c5o]

❤

[@julieagain]

❤