The Power Of Not Reacting | Respond vs. React With A Narcissist

When you feel like you've been invited to a fight, it's almost like an obligation for you to attend. Except, you're not really obligated. You can decide when and how to engage with a narcissist -- even in the most difficult of times. In this video, I talk about how not reacting is so much more powerful than fighting or retreating into defense mode. If you're looking for motivation to use respond over react, this is it.
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#narcissist #narcissism
*In this video, I share the tips, techniques and insights that have worked for me in my own journey of healing after narcissistic abuse along with expert tips and tools I've learned through years of coaching narcissistic abuse survivors. I am not a therapist and this video is not meant to provide therapy of any form. #narcissist #covertnarcissist

[@sanjanabhatia5156]

Go SOBER - Stop, Observe and don’t absorb, Breathe, Emotionally detach, Remain calm. Being calm when you are being disrespected is a superpower. ❤️

[@petermacallan4645]

Emotional sobriety 💪🔥🙏

[@mybubblez]

I love this ❤️

[@perlgirl534]

Perfectly said!

[@parker.100]

this is awesome! it's hard to remember all of the tools in the heat of the moment. thank you for this!

[@sanjanabhatia5156]

@@parker.100 You’re welcome. It’s easier said than done. I blew it yesterday. 😖Will keep practicing. ☺️

[@nonenone6884]

The answer to every problem is to walk away

[@gracesanity6314]

Remember bullies hate being bullied back. Dont be passive. Be stragetic.

[@garycordle5295]

Take them like a grain of salt 🧂 and don't take nothing to heart ❤️ whatever they might say, observe don't absorb 🙏👍 Christina and survivors and thrivers 🦋

[@CommonEgo]

Observe don't absorb, I like that ❤️🙏

[@kingstropharia8011]

Hello Gary, from northern minnesota. Hey I liked your comment too. Observe but don't obsorbe. That's a good one.

[@petermacallan4645]

Ross Rosenberg 🙏🔥

[@OG_Bearcat]

Going through this with a bad neighbor. I’m not reacting. So hard, but so rewarding!

[@CommonEgo]

It is definitely rewarding, and something to be proud of whenever you're able to control those urges... if it were easy, it wouldn't matter so much. The more you feel triggered, the higher the stakes 🙏❤️

[@bdawnedon]

know what thats like.

[@danamansutti9441]

I feel your pain.

[@shamukek4805]

I just tell my bad neighbor..if she tries to engage.. " I have said.. don't talk to me" and keep moving..

[@Shane-gw5yt]

Same. Romanian neighbors in flat above me stamping shouting slamming things on the floor all day every day.

[@markthomas4083]

It is such a challenge to be non reactive. For myself to be silent is almost impossible. Time to end the relationship, it won’t improve.

[@janetstonerook4552]

That's the nice thing about being older and retired. I don't get triggered often emotionally.( Since I don't owe anybody anything financially and have no bosses.) I avoid negativity whenever possible. I have systemically winnowed the narcissists out of my life in the last several years. Sure wish I'd known all this earlier in my life. But, it's darn good now.

[@happyday3368]

Yes, me too! Retired early but still the persnickity narcs are there in groups that we belong to. I just enforce my boundaries - I dont' need anything from them except friendshipl, But if they're showing me gossip, negativity -bye! I just don't engage because I know what it can do to me.

[@rde4017]

When they start raging and insulting you, always remember they are talking about themselves. They can give you reams of information about themselves without even realising it.

[@Chess4everyones]

You have power over your mind not outside events, you realize this, you find your strength

[@tedtalkshockey1966]

They try to transfer their negativity onto you so that they can feel better by making you feel worse. I hurt one of these people very badly once, they were gossiping to me about someone else and all I said was “why are you telling me this?” They still talk about that comment. They couldn’t give me an honest answer without looking bad so I handcuffed them verbally.

[@soulsistah5738]

Narcs don’t like shame

[@ffmtnlaurel3983]

"You can't take the high road on a high horse" ~ Matt Kahn.

[@athaisdubaie852]

When dealing with my narcissist sister, I set boundaries for a reason. No name calling, no putting me down or putting my successes down, etc. This way, I no longer had to respond. The rule was that if she violated a boundary, I would walk away/hang up/not respond to the email or letter, etc. So, if she did violate a boundary, I would just do the pre-determined action and leave her figure it out. Unfortunately, her abuse continued to get worse over time, but I stuck to doing the pre-determined reaction. Eventually, I got tired dealing with the abuse and am no contact with her now.

[@janicebaker1966]

I have the same problem with my daughter. I can't comprehend the way she thinks. I'm always caught off guard when she suddenly attacks me in what is a normal conversation. She accuses me of manipulation or says some hurtful thing for no reason. I don't understand it and it only makes me hate her.

[@handebarlas6248]

@@janicebaker1966 Hate your daıghter??? Isn’t that too strong?? I’ve never heard someone hating their own child, and I’m 65. That’s tragic. You really need a therapist either together with her, or on your own. Is she a teenager? Then it’s normal behaviour on her part. Do either of you have a mental issue? I mean it is such an important matter that it cannot be taken lightly... You cannot go around saying you “ hate” your daughter. Get help.

[@hishealer]

I imagine circus music while I'm breathing. Then I watch the clown dance. Show them who you are, I'll wait. (Try not to laugh, it won't help the situation.)

[@jamiewilliams8107]

I've learnt not to react to a narcissist as they get a kick out of attention.

[@keithharding701]

This is so true. Our last home purchase would be the beginning of 7 years of harassment from the narcissist next door. We have had City Code enforcement called on us multiple times, only to have each case thrown out by the city council, many letters from our HOA for "created vilations" that were never followed up on after we challenged them, verbal abuse and attempts to recruit flying monkeys to co-retaliate against us with false accusations. Although extremely difficult, we never sought vengeance. They finally moved about a year ago. Our neighborhood is so peaceful now with them gone.

[@gail6844]

I wish mine would move out. 13 years of it.

[@glenncowan6669]

There's so many brilliant people dropping knowledge. KZbin is way better than television!!

[@sbg4ever120]

One comment below says to observe and not absorb! Words to live by! I need to meditate on that and repeat to myself until it becomes a new healthy habit. ❤️🙏

[@SuperBlakes2]

I am mainly able to not react outwardly. But I still have the emotional explosion inside myself, and really struggle to not ruminate on what was just said or done. Great video. So right, not so easy to do

[@carrie402]

I know exactly what you mean. I spent most of last night re-living all the injustices instead of sleeping. I just could not get my mind to stop - so frustrating.

[@amorepsyche808]

@@carrie402 people take it out , it is so releasing! You have to say your truth without being reactive..say what you have to say it will make u seek if u take it inside

[@sherikwasnik5290]

I always find the strong desire to put people in their place. It always ends up in them attacking me and sometimes, it gets personal. I need to stop and walk away. So hard to do.

[@SJP43]

I had a moment at work that sent me over the top and I felt horrible that I allowed myself to let them take me there. I took some long hard deep breaths, read a Bible scripture and promised myself that I could never allow these people to get me to react like that again.

[@josephharderman747]

Good for you great response I too have fallen victim to the same thing the beautiful part is we recognized what we done held ourselves accountable learned from it and kept it moving peace ✌️ and blessings upon you beloved respectfully keep up the great work

[@dianepotteryoga]

Thank you, I really needed this. I teach 7th-11th graders, so you can imagine the need I have to not react.

[@stardustsparkles22]

If they're insulting you and trying to trigger you around others ,just look at them and calmly say ,"Wow,that's really hurtful" and leave it at that. Leave it in the lap . Why? Because you'll put the ball on the door, and they're the ones who end up looking bad. Works for me.

[@evabonnet2369]

Yea, but it’s still a reaction. It’s always best to not respond. You look at them, and walk off. Words unspoken.

[@cjm537]

Excellent 😊 Thank you for sharing 💗

[@sherikwasnik5290]

“Wow. That is a really interesting thing to say out loud”. Usually people feel really embarrassed, and stop talking.

[@rakastellar8955]

it wouldn't work for me, he'd just say i am too sensitive and people would laugh

[@nryane]

Thank you, Christina. For the past 10 months I have been dealing with my upstairs condo neighbor, who has mental health issues. He screams and yells at his girlfriend and that is triggering for me. Over the months I’ve reported him to our strata council and have been advised to note all the incidents and report them via email to the management company for our condo building. After several emails, this man was fined by the council and he simply escalated his anger. Recently, I’ve found an empathetic employee of the management company, who suggested that I record the events. I did so and submitted the recordings a few days ago. Strata council are apparently appalled and will be doing something to correct this situation. It truly has been a learning experience! My parents yelled and argued with one another when my siblings and I were little. Hence the “triggering” of this man’s voice for me. I am re-entering EMDR therapy in June of this year, to help me recover my sense of self since the pandemic. I’m looking forward to finding additional ways to “respond” vs. reacting. Blessings!

[@zifangkb2061]

“You can keep your pain. I do not have it.” Good

[@aylasalci1883]

....And you can drive them crazy by not reacting!😄😄😄👍🏻

[@jonathancasavant7541]

This is what and where I want to be and never give my power

[@jillh2186]

I was with a narcissist for many years and fortunately my parents built in me a very strong healthy confidence within myself. And I would say this is why I’m no longer with that narcissist because he never broke my Confidence and never could put out my light

[@dianepinkyharman1346]

I reacted to the narcissist. I was very strong and made a mistake. I think for me, I will do an affirmations. For me, I now have signs around my apartment DON'T REACT..... I am arming with notes, all over my apartment. I think it will help. MY opinion is also not to react. She is right. Narcissists love you to react. Give yourself a kiss and go on with your life. Know you're triggers. Narcissists want to hurt you. She is so right. It is negative energy. It is not easy to let it go when you are an empath. Be positive as I always say.

[@gogo-bi9qh]

I reacted too - when she posted photos of new supply. I regret it, but I gotta let it go. Probably doesn't matter anyway. She'll see it as a win, but that feeling of "I got him" won't last forever. I'm gonna post notes too!

[@nicolegolding1165]

Since my narcissist husband is the only one who gets a negative reaction I try to interact as little as possible. I am currently working on that in therapy right now.

[@alcudiababe1]

I understand that this is about responding rather than reacting and I have to say when you act you come from a place of calmness and assertiveness just because you are less triggered. The thing is though that Narcissist will be attacking your self esteem your character your image and you feel like a pig going in for the slaughter. What started off as having a plan for everything I knew they'd say, so I went in more prepared, they then started to attack my boyfriend just so they could trigger me and I'm getting to the point where I feel I don't have a nice kind caring family they'd really try and find ways that he wasn't up to scratch or try to say something about him that he did not deserve which was a dehumanising thing to have to sit through. The personal attacks on me came later and your ego gets hurt - one way or another they trigger you. They hurt your heart, your feelings and your ego and when you accept them that they are something you've trodden on your shoe, you know they are scum, you know that's what they are and if you have to deal with them you just accept your talking to a horrible human being and then suddenly when they are nice, they try their hand at being nice it throws you. So I'd say imagine your mum your partner or whoever is this tiger, and you're a fox passing by. You know they can take you out but at the moment they're choosing not to, but as you wouldn't stick your hand into a tigers cage it means you shouldn't tempt fate. They'll turn on you again and it's equally more devastating so just expect the worst - not reacting is so hard and takes a lot of inner strength but if you see it as you are the master of you, controlling your emotions and they're throwing a fit they're no longer in control. You have to try and think you can't control them you control how you react then you come from a place of strength

[@hishealer]

On the other hand, if they could do worse, wouldn't they be doinv it already? I started challenging my mom. Looking her in the eye. Not reacting. Saying no and not letting her trick me into her fake emergencies. Calling her an uber instead of dropping everything and running. She screamed louder. That's it. She did get meaner, and some people finally saw it. But I'm grown now. She doesn't provide my food or housing, so she can't take it away. If I don't go to her house, she can't touch me. If she comes to mine, I don't have to open the door. Please don't live in false fear. You've got this. #OutOfTheFOG

[@alcudiababe1]

@@hishealer this one time my Mom came over to mine. I'd just moved into a new house that year and I was going on holiday and Mom came over trying to organise me and the house. She wanted to put a wash on and everything and I was taking care of everything in my own house so this was when I'd fully mastered the act don't react technique and I remained calm she attacked me, my ego, myself started attacking Gary, my husband, trying to say we weren't living up to scratch, tried muzzling on everything and I remembered a few comments like your sisters right about you she says this, she says that, and you're so selfish. I didn't respond pretty soon she was saying how I was working her up. Calmy I said you're working yourself up and she'd worked herself up that much, got herself that angry, she was practically spitting blood about me and my life and my husband she started shaking, she visably started shaking and I think looking back maybe I should have booted her out the house but I've never seen my mom like this before so I gave her a notepad and pen so she could write down a list of things to do around the house before we left for our holidays, she was shaking that much the pen was juddering but right then I just decided I wasn't going to respond to her I needed her to calm down. In fact I think I acted like the parent after the lifesized toddler screamed and shouted and got to the point of the shakes I behaved in a way that was firm but loving enough (she probably didn't deserve it) but I'm not going to hurt my Mom when she's like that that's the difference between me and my Mother sometimes. Eventually she calms down and says how our Uncle Jack passing has affected her - deep down I know it's no excuse but I just empathised because he's my uncle too and let her clean the bathroom I think. She was like this when Granddad died and when someone dies you have literally no control but I think she tries to think what can I control and oh my god she starts reorganizing me or my house and it can be too much but a situation has happened where she's powerless and she tries controlling me and because she does then we run into problems. See, if I didn't love her in my own heart I'd kick her to the kerb and leave her there because of how she's treated me I wouldn't put up with it from anybody else, triggering me, hurting my heart but I can't do that when she's down. I don't want to hurt my Mom. That's how I regain inner strength by reminding myself of the kind of strength I hold myself. She might, because she's careless with her words, trying to fight me but I'm not her and if I had have kicked her out which she probably deserved - which I have done once or twice whilst she's spitting blood in temper but when I see a softer side I'm not going to do anything to her

[@nicholashudson1283]

Just Imagine you are dealing with a toddler or child that will never let you win over them or else they break down in a tantrum. Because they are an emotional child and they have an emotional intelligence of a child too. Apparently their emotional intelligence is usually only between an age of 8 to 12 years old. Something happens during childhood called Arrested Development and their emotional intelligence stops maturing past that age, usually due to some form of extreme parenting. Either childhood trauma and neglect can cause it which I think tends to form a Covert Narc. Or them always being treated as a golden child and being put on a pedestal as a child can turn them into a Overt Narc or Covert Narc. So as you wouldn't react or try to win a fight with a toddler or child, as it's a waste of time getting through to them and they most likely throw a tantrum, rage or deeply resent you. Don't react and fight with a man or woman who has a emotional intelligence and emotional regulation of a child. Understand they may be an adult, but emotionally you are dealing with someone who's emotionally underdeveloped. Emotionally they are probably not even as emotionally mature as a teenager.

[@AmyChrysis]

Thank you! This is the first time I've seen anyone else remark that a narc could be born from being the Golden Child and put on a pedestal! This is my narc father (who is also BTW named Nicholas) through and through. "Little Nicky can do no wrong" and 'Nicky can take care of it. He's perfect." He's 93 and the youngest of 6. He abused my mother (she died 8 years ago) and me horribly. Every interaction is a trial for my sanity. I so appreciate the toddler tantrum/arrested development take on narcs. I will try this tactic since I cannot go no contact.

[@thewaywardtrio]

Your my favorite content provider on this subject! Thank you so much for what you do.

[@iamgoddessoflove]

There should be no excuses for staying in a relationship with someone that puts you through more stress and pain over love and joy. 💙KZbinr That Helps People Overcome Toxic Relationships

[@JadenHybrid]

Thank you for this video. You speak a lot of truth to this subject.

[@andrewb2326]

This is incredible. You are giving me tools to change my life. I was feeling poorly when I started watching. By the end I was feeling less burdened. Thank you. Your points about them projecting their pain onto the victim, and the ego leading you where youve been before. Both priceless pieces of advice for me. You are wonderful.

[@dougronald561]

Her videos are really helping me.

[@davidpitchford6510]

Leave the narcissist now immediately forever; let HER get therapy -- the victims of narcissists do not need instruction, they need distance and non communication

[@lucyelander298]

Thanks for this video, it really helped me with what I'm experiencing at the moment, with regard to negative beliefs being triggered by abusive people.. .. I'm learning not to engage people who are abusive, and to not allow their negativity to have a negative effect on me - by not reacting to them I'm learning not to let them have a negative effect on me, by not engaging and not reacting to them.. I rely on these videos for encouragement, so thankyou.

[@stardustsparkles22]

This was SO HELPFUL. Thank you!!! Thank you so much. I was looking for a way to take my power back, and you show me how! THANK YOU 💛💯

[@ciara8998]

I find it easily to not respond. I was a stepmom, 50-50 custody of a 5 and 10-year-old… They are now in their 30s… Their mother was bipolar, an alcoholic… She was something. She would yell and scream in front of the children at us (mostly me)/at the children in front of me and her ex… she would just ramble and scream to the point people would open their windows and doors and watch while we stood on the driveway and she stood on the porch and screamed. I always felt so badly for the children. It always made me feel better to not say a thing… many, many, many years of wanting to scream or punch her… But, I never did. And I always spoke highly of her and encourage the children to call her when they were with us. But, then again… I had a great childhood. No one believes me that I've never seen my parents argue. I'm just telling you, I've never seen my parents argue! And other situations (unless someone was about to get physically hurt), I like to think first. I wonder what that means? Maybe I shouldn't have commented at 2:44 😬🙃

[@CommonEgo]

Sounds like you did the difficult thing and took the high road, and I guess that you and the kids are much better off for it ❤️🙏

[@tropicalladyj8033]

Thank you for another great video! Real world relevance- love it!

[@sapphire7424]

All this past week I've been reacting badly when I just know I should have kept my mouth shut. Then this is suggested and I am SO GRATEFUL to have finally found you 💛 have subbed and started a binge of your channel. Christina I am home 😍 great hair btw

[@elhadjdiallo633]

That's the reason why knowledge and education is the keys to transform anyone's life ....I feel sorry for the illitrate people I know for sure billions peoples are suffering due to lack of knowledge a d education...I'm indeed elated, thrilled and delighted that I'm highly educated , intelligent, good-looking, handsome etc..I know for sure how to deal with toxic delusional, vindictive snd awful people I know my worth and value for sure !!!

[@GingerNinja1]

You always provide such valuable information.

[@jenniferpicard7550]

Thank You soooo... Much For Helping Confirm That in Which I Already Figured,YOU ARE A GOD SEND ! BLESS YOU AND YOURS ,AND YOUR GUARDIAN ANGELS GUIDE YOU PROTECT YOU & YOURS ,AND MAY YOU HAVE MANY HEALTHY ,& HARMONIOUS DAYS FILLED WITH A AWESOMENESS !!😇 FROM ANGEL IN MESA ,ARIZONA 🤗

[@solideogloria007]

Wow.. thank you. This is so on point and very helpful. Thank you!

[@izawaniek2568]

Thank you for a very helpful video. Spot on.

[@Rose-gy1cc]

I’m trying hard not to react. It’s hard though living with two of them.

[@MsVivian99]

Great guidance and insight Thankyou

[@yvettewaritay2654]

Thank you for this message❤

[@christinas.6336]

From one Christina to another 😆 thank you for this video. I have been soo reactive lately..I needed this today! 🙌

[@CommonEgo]

So glad to hear it was helpful. Thank you for sharing ❤️🙏

[@trobertw]

Thank you for making these videos

[@paulotoole4634]

Excellent, excellent.

[@VixenTurnedPedestrian20]

This was really good. Thank u

[@martinamilosevic8101]

wonderful! best advises ever!

[@WielkieOdpowiedzi]

Thanks for well explained wisdom!

[@editszebeledi1113]

I can see from the answers that it is a difficult topic. Please do more videos about it. Thanks

[@caramelfrappuccino234]

Good content & soothing voice. Thanks. 💛

[@Simple-tj9ov]

Beautiful. Thank you.

[@cymbolichuman433]

This is good advice explained really well. I've been Grey Rocking, and this helps.

[@TImothyBailey-pp2og]

After that cold plunge I don't think I could react to anything if I wanted to!

[@raekm]

I prefer to answer calmly, very slowly, even if the other person is yelling, pulling his hair out and accusing you of many things. Or just laugh it off, if the situation is totally ridiculous: sometimes people can't possibly be reasoned with

[@monikakudelska203]

This is great video thank you ❤❤❤

[@Kassiex5]

Thank you !

[@Angell_Lee]

Thank you so much, I love you so much! xo

[@davidwegman168]

Hi I am new to your channel and loving it , it's great to find a different perspective nice work

[@CommonEgo]

Thanks, David! And welcome 🙏 ❤️

[@keionsmomaccessories2851]

Finally somebody got me. This is so me

[@titikamaragoula4150]

Excellent

[@JohnSmith-wo7ns]

The key to it all.

[@Shane-gw5yt]

Thank you 🙏

[@MiaMaria20]

Thank you for this! It's a big weak point I have. I am so sensitive and some word's can trigger me so fast (but really hurtfull and actually useless phrases towards me).

[@DTFdiesel]

I don't even listen when she calls me anymore... It's all just bait, gaslighting and blame shifting. She calls and i just put the phone down until she's done. Sometimes an hour long phone call and I have no idea what she said haha

[@danaanad5168]

I’ve been doing these tactics for awhile now suddenly I’m still loving and kind and I don’t react , now he wants to see a therapist after 6 years of hell and gaslighting, … it’s like a curve ball and I don’t know , all the sudden he’s going the work with a side of hurt …

[@MikinessAnalog]

When he discovered I no longer can be manipulated, guilt tripped or have my feelings hurt, he now has a dachshund he refuses to train out of trying to bite. So it has become a physical threat of harm. When or if I end up defending myself, he will call law enforcement & go to jail for lying on report, possibly lying to my family say it was me that pressed charges.

[@subhashnisarta3347]

I am very happy to hear from you and your opinion about how I respond to the people So it's an important thing because it is directly connected to the people's emotions if anyone is hurt by emotional it can be a great problem So thank you so much for a long time ❤️❤️😊🗣️💟 with the people and make it positive approach guidence for me #opinion for positive approach.

[@elenagirelli170]

Please pray for protection..

[@dirkslifeadvice5339]

The first sentence I hit a like on your video. Nice.

[@user-kj1nf2ki6p]

Being present in the moment ask yourself why am I allowing myself to be triggered and do I want to be triggered? By the time you’ve asked and answered these 2 questions the moment has passed, so you can leave their remarks/behaviours with them and move on safe in the knowledge they didn’t get a reaction out of you. If you can’t do that yet, hum or whistle till the moment’s passed. Good luck❤

[@susmithanadar4034]

wow you are a genius

[@damienwelch9067]

Calculating respond 😮

[@donusher2951]

very good video

[@angelabrainky7786]

Thank you

[@desertrose2085]

This is exactly my problem.

[@1withsprinkles]

I really connect with the idea "commit to changing your story" and that the ego is only going to drive you to where you've been before. I have an email I haven't responded to. It for sure came from a cloudy negative place. It attempts to list various personal obstacles from my past from long before I knew him. They are things I shared with him that I overcame or grew from - a health issue, a goal I thought my life depended on that I've since achieved (and learned my life didn't depend on it)....Well, here I'm telling you my defense, ha! Anyway, there is one thing in the list that I think is what you are saying, is triggering. It bothers me. I keep imaging different ways to react. It is taking energy to not email anything back. I'm thinking now, after watching your video, about what it is about that one thing on the list. I wish I could explain better but in that list, it is that one thing and I think I need to commit to changing my story. Thank you.

[@cosmoflyerstarshine8333]

I'm going through this right now, I've become involved with a , I really can't say, where other people can read, but I've left his foot back in the door. Triggers galore, now I'm t

[@cynthiafortier2540]

7 times for us to learn. Get out quietly

[@Alex-drift]

Hmm 🤔 this is interesting. I didn’t realize that by reacting instead responding actually encourages ruminating after the situation. But also shows what parts are active. the ego or the self.. lol 😂.

[@patrickbrannen2887]

Be stoic but then again women do not like this because you really dont "share" if you are stoic. Being stoic is like a having a super power.

[@nathanalexander8468]

After experience, a reaction of patience and understanding is just as bad as a reaction of assertion and defense. No react and no internalization seems to be the only way if possible. Thoughts?

[@CommonEgo]

Definitely true if you're extending that reaction to someone who will take advantage of your patience and understanding 🙏❤️

[@michiganmymichigan]

I can relate. Positive and negative action and comments around me can over stimulate. I practice being separate, while reminding myself I am still a caring person. My reactions, or even actions and comments are not required. Namaste. ❤

[@emiliadavis8247]

If you're staying in the relationship with the person, by your reaction -- being patient and understanding, or a reaction of assertion and defense -- I see this as being manipulated! You're putting up with it, either way. So you're allowing them to continue that behavior, while you suffer! Not good!

[@terriwhalen3618]

Very good, I am learning when things trigger me, that means I need to look within, probably something not healed. An old wound. If someone can't trigger me that is a good sign I have dealt with whatever. Aldo, how we deal with an encounter I'd so important. For example say, it is constructive criticism, well, I want to be mature enough to thank the person because I can work on it. And if it is not true, I can laugh it off or say, you are entitled to your own opinions. Something like that.

[@terriwhalen3618]

So true! I am learning these techniques as we speak. Emotional intelligence, regulation feels so much better after an encounter.

[@sajisnair9354]

Reality of spiritual 🕵🏼️😂

[@BigPete44]

Hey there Christina 🙏♥️

[@CommonEgo]

Hi Pete 🙏❤️

[@cliffflanders9667]

Interesting and helpful. One question, though: What does "leveling up" mean? I don't know that expression. Thanks.

[@caseylovett7901]

I have to try this but if I am offended so I am hurt inside am I meant to just bottle it up? Because to me not being able to say what’s bothered me I will walk away and not react and yes I haven’t been nasty back but I sit there thinking and thinking over and over again of the abuse, so how am I meant to just let it go? Knowing they are likely to do it again ?

[@iosgaming2824]

The only way to get over hurt someone has caused you especially from someone who doesn’t have remorse is by getting over the hurt although that’s easier to say then it is to do

[@garycordle5295]

Casey you must learn to let go of these toxic thoughts that don't serve you nothing at all, and let go of toxic people that don't serve you nothing at all, observe don't absorb 🙏

[@crystalcole888]

You don't have to let it go. You just have to understand that the reason they're doing what they do is to get a reaction out of you. They want you to react, and to explode, and to fight back. When you understand that by not reacting that you're not giving them what they want, then it starts to feel good not to react. That's when you start to win. When no matter what they do they can see that they have no effect on you. That they are not important at all. That's when they're the ones that walk away hurt inside. And other people can see how they treat you and it makes them look terrible. You can respond to them. But do it in a monotone like you don't care at all. Keep it very short. It will show that you are unaffected, even if you are. This will take lots of practice so don't feel bad if it takes you awhile. Best of luck to you.

[@damienwelch9067]

Write ✍ your own stage

[@travisbartholomay]

Hi. How are you Christina. I want to learn about emotions. I know my own feeling pretty well. But it's through my own way of looking at common sense. I don't know the right question. Do you know the path to a few other people that are also skilled like you are. that have mastered emotions. Thank you your awesome

[@caroltousignant1542]

You ought to have videos on people with bipolar and schizo affective disorder I think it is similar to narcissist people but there is a distinction between the two.

[@DaleSellers]

What the heck?!? Opps, ya got me haha 😂

[@editszebeledi1113]

When dealing with a narcissist, how the narcissist decides whether you are silent because you are weak and an easy taget or you are strong, non-reactive and he/she'd better leave you alone? I struggle with this question a lot. Because they are comming back testing, trying to tease you.

[@user-cs3bi2cj7b]

Yesssss

[@DR-nh6oo]

If you want to stop reacting, first you need to decode the gaslighting.