The Rise of Heartstopper | Video Essay

let's talk about alice oseman's heartstopper netflix show, queer romance, teen friendship - and how it fits into lgbtq+ media and representation!
Download Notion for free: ntn.so/rowanellis
Support me on Patreon: / rowanellis
Pre-order Here & Queer: smarturl.it/HereAndQueer
Email your pre-order book receipt (& postal address) to [e-mail] to receive a signed bookplate! 🌈💙
Twitter: / heyrowanellis
Instagram: / heyrowanellis
__HIRE ME__
www.rowanellis.com/book-me/
I deliver engaging and inspiring workshops and talks at events, businesses, and universities across the world (see below for more details).
If you would like to speak about the possibility of me running a workshop or speaking at an event please get in touch via email: [e-mail].
__WORKSHOPS__
I facilitate tailor made workshops, designed to give participants a variety of discussion opportunities, interactive elements, and a final longer task individually or as part of a group.
The goal of my workshops is that participants come out of the them with actionable points to be put into practice afterwards, rather than feeling as if they had simply talked through the same old topics on that subject.
__TALKS & PANELS__
Talks, presentations, panels and Q&As allow for an in depth look at a topic or issue. I can deliver solo talks on a specific topic and/or moderate or sit on group panels. I have previously spoken on topics including:
- Building Inclusive Communities
- Using KZbin for social good and charitable efforts
- LGBTQ+ Representation on TV/Film
- LGBTQ+ History
- Pop culture and Feminism
- Writing Strong Female Characters
- Women on KZbin
- How to use KZbin/social media as a tool in your career.
- & many more.

[@HeyRowanEllis]

Download Notion for free: ntn.so/rowanellis 💙 Pre-order Here & Queer: smarturl.it/HereAndQueer 🌈

[@sharoncaseyledwidge]

Delighted to see Notion sponsoring this video - perfect match for you ❤️ hope this is a long standing relationship.

[@mattybrunolucaszeneresalas9072]

Sadly this show didn’t teach anyone made Kit lie and in th end it was toxic

[@kasia8306]

"when Nick confesses that he feels like his real personality has been buried inside of him, we can see coming out as more than just discovering your sexuality, but also figuring out all the ways that you've been pretending & performing for others - it's an internal process as much as an external verbalisation" - this makes so much sense!!! excellent essay as always, so well formulated

[@Acinnn]

I wonder if Imogen reaction hints some more of growth of her character...or if she actually migh be in second season.

[@SpaztasticSheep]

💖💖💖

[@mattybrunolucaszeneresalas9072]

Not really since he didn’t feel this way _before_

[@emilybissinger]

RIGHT !! god Nick is such a revolutionary character in mainstream media

[@satya4234]

I love that Heartstopper is like: "Hey, queer teens exist and they have deep and complex lives, and can support each other/ find love at a young age" and Our Flag Means Death is in the other side of the room saying "Hey, queer adults exist and they have deep and complex lives, and can support each other/ find love at an older age" and we're just nodding enthusiasticly, happily agreeing.

[@yasminechoerryscherry3701]

I physically need to watch Our flag means death!! I think I'm gonna watch it this summer

[@goblinnnn]

@@yasminechoerryscherry3701its pretty good

[@bowwilliams9011]

It's that muscle handshake meme

[@zellalaing5439]

I love both shows. I love that in OFMD they kinda totally normalised queer relationships at sea, at that is was far more about Stede being different to blackbward that everyone was like "youve changed blackbeard" had nothing to do with their genders.

[@colonelweird]

A bisexual boy as a main character - not a villain, not sex-addicted, just a normal kid - is absolutely revolutionary. It's the first time I've seen such a thing - if this had existed when I was that age, my life would have been very different. I would have known immediately that that's what I was, instead of taking years to figure it out, wondering why I couldn't get rid of those fantasies involving other guys. This show is great, but I'm especially happy to see that, at long last.

[@HBDiniz10]

Isn't charlie the main character though? He's gay

[@colonelweird]

@@HBDiniz10 Yes but I don't mean protagonist - Nick is one of several main characters.

[@HBDiniz10]

@@colonelweird oh yeah that's true, sorry

[@rene9736]

as a bi girl, i feel like i’ve rarely seen bi boys portrayed so mainstream in the media - i love how alice created nick nelson. bisexuality is so dismissed in the media and even in the lgbtq community. when i watched nick’s coming out scene, i think i cried straight after. it was heartwarming, and i just love heartstopper so much. i can relate to all the characters, especially charlie and definitely nick. i also love young royals! just throwing that out there

[@miche8868]

+

[@phillipasoocinnamonroll4812]

The most realistic thing about heartstopper is that Charlie isn’t the token gay friend, but instead has a queer friend group, with Tao being the token cishet of the group.

[@dw7896]

And at no point is Tao fussed about any of it

[@jemappellemerci]

This 😂 queer people have a way of finding each other even before coming out

[@Queer_boiled_ears]

Ok but so realistic though like I’ve NEVER seen an all cis het friend group with a token gay cuz usually when one friend comes out slowly everyone does except one cis het friend who fits right in because they were all friends before anyone came out

[@Queer_boiled_ears]

@@jemappellemercino fr tho it’s the gaydar instinct

[@applepieexplosion4030]

It's more realistic 😂😂 every queer friend group I've been a part of had a token cishet

[@princerank3347]

Watching Nick's bisexual confusion scene was the most seen I've ever felt. I wasn't able to figure out my bisexuality until my twenties because it's SO EASY to just ignore everything when you do have legitimate crushes on the opposite sex and bisexuality is so dismissed, even within the lgbtqia+ community itself. If I had a show like this as a kid, instead of Santana getting angry at Brittany for still being interested in guys, I would have been able to tell myself the truth a long time ago. And yeah I screamed when his mom turned on Pirates of the Caribbean. that's bi culture right there.

[@deren9535]

exactly!! though i’ve only recently become an adult, i feel like i owe queer media a lot since feel like i was able to accept my bisexuality relatively easily thanks to it. yeah, i did try to gaslight myself into thinking i was straight or a lesbian, but i was able to get over it quickly thanks to having healthier representation than say any “gay best friend” that appeared for a second to give the lead fashion advice.

[@laurieannegagnon]

exactly! i was so happy when it turned out he was bi. where were my bi models when i was young 😂

[@angelaholmes8888]

Same for me it wasn't until I was in my 20,s did I realize that I was bisexual 🤔🌈

[@ezequielmondada6427]

Same for me, except I thought I was gay because of more attraction and no information into bisexuality.

[@alejandroojeda1572]

Wait, do you think she did in on purpose. Like at that point she pretty much knows there's something between Nick and Charlie. Perhaps pirates of the Caribbean was intentional

[@anska7475]

What I especially liked about this show was, how free of unnecessary drama it was. So much romance fiction uses drama rooted in seriously bad problem-solving to create suspense, that it was refreshing to see characters who genuinely care about each other and try to avoid hurting their friends.

[@janisc3683]

I so agree, everytime it veered near a potentially annoying trope, it subverted my expectations and it was such a pleasant thing to watch.

[@greeneyesgirl467]

These teens have better communication skills then most adults in dramas lol

[@helenm1085]

Honestly there's kind of more drama in the tv show than the comic - not by much, but just a few extra things so that each episode can have a story arc

[@topaz_no_life9440]

literally almost every love story - queer or otherwise - that i have watched is rooted in completely unnecessary drama. where the characters completely shut down or lose it after there is a simple miscommunication. the thing about nick and charlie (and tara and darcy, elle and tao, to a lesser extent) is that they know how to communicate their feelings! they are much more emotionally mature and literate than most of the adults that i know in my life. even more than i can be and i’m 21. it’s really good for kids to see that type of relationship in media, especially queer media!!

[@juleskessler5243]

The only thing that fed into that was the Imogen asking Nick out in such a public way thing (which wasn’t in the comic btw). I mean he decided to be honest with her and then her dog died? Really? But they resolved it in a really mature way that didn’t invalidate either character’s feelings (or Nick’s sexuality), and Imogen ended up as an ally to Nick.

[@Zapporah85]

As an Ace too, I really appreciate how non-sexual this show is. It's just nice and wholesome. I don't mind having characters with active sex lives, but it's nice to not have it be a thing. And it's one of those shows where, when/if it gets to that point, I feel like I can trust how they'll handle it. It's something I'm going to want to sit and watch with my kids on a rainy day.

[@apocalypseready6256]

Right though? It’s so refreshing (and realistic). Even most people who aren’t aro/ace aren’t nearly as obsessed with sex during their teen years as high school dramas make them out to be. At least, in my experience. Most of the people I know in college haven’t lost their virginity or even had their first kiss, and they’re perfectly fine with that (myself included). Most teen dramas hyperbolize underage sex to a point that it feels borderline exploitative, like the writers are just looking for an excuse to put their characters in provocative situations-when in fact, it’s a non-issue for many people.

[@raf4320]

chapter 7 in the graphic novel rn is about charlie and nick wanting to go a step further in their relationship so be aware of that, but like you said i trust them to handle it with as much love and care as they have the rest of the series

[@florencee3324]

Yes so many teen shows are oddly hyper sexual and it makes me sooo uncomfortable. Like can we not have cute handholding, cooking together etc moments instead?😩

[@cursedwyvern3044]

I’m ace too, and I loved it! Apparently the author is aro-ace, so they definitely get it! ❤️❤️❤️❤️

[@anska7475]

I pondered about this too since watching the show, because I had to pinpoint why I label sex scenes in some movies/series as „useless“. And I think it‘s because very often sex is a very lazy way to substitute romance. It‘s not something people might at one point in their relationship decide to do (or not), but a short-hand for saying that the characters are in love without having to actually explore and establish their relationship. And it‘s so annoying and I am so happy about every show that takes the time for their characters‘ relationships.

[@akym82810]

Side note: I can never get over the irony of having a show called Sex Education being restricted to 18+.

[@whatcanidooo]

it honestly shouldn’t be, I think most teens would be fine watching it, literally the main character starts out being 15

[@akym82810]

@@whatcanidooo Yeah but this comes to the crux of the silliness of the age restriction system. I think it's not about the content but the language that actually pushes SE into that kind of rating. I mean, yes it does feature nudity sometimes but actually less than you think - its the f-bombs and all that (which is, let's face it, how a teenager talks). In Heartstopper, I was able to fully suspend my disbelief on the idea that a gay teenage crush on a rugby jock gets requited, but I find it hard to believe that any teenager talks that "clean" with their friends.

[@whatcanidooo]

@@akym82810 oh lol yeah I didn’t even think about that

[@avamander.]

The rating systems are so prudish. There's gore and abuse that's rated more suitable. I hope that if someone is actually hindered by those ratings then at least their parents would assess the suitability more realistically.

[@emilyholewka8784]

@@akym82810 Your username! Squirrel Girl!!

[@Me-ss2gq]

With Heartstopper and the Crush movie coming out within weeks of each other, wholesome queer romcoms truly are becoming the norm and I’m sO excited to see it

[@kay-jay1581]

I haven’t heard of “crush” before I’ll have to look it up right now lol

[@boop_beep_sheep4876]

Where can one watch crush when comes out

[@clover6499]

^

[@angeladavidson2350]

I haven't heard of crush, where do we watch it?

[@karenalonso3773]

@@angeladavidson2350 it is from Hulu, so it depends where are you from✨

[@daneroberts1996]

When Charlie looks at the notification from a message from Nick and his lock screen says "gay panic" i thought that was the subtitles 😂

[@lockheart619]

SAME LMAO

[@samjensen392]

I absolutely love the scene where Nick sees Tara and Darcy kiss at the party, because we had just watched him fall down the rabbit hole of homophobia, but then there’s those two girls who are so clearly ecstatic about kissing each other in public. It’s a reminder to him that gay people actually can be happy. (I just really love the relationship between Nick and Tara in general; her saying that she doesn’t necessarily plan to “come out” with a big announcement but rather just to stop hiding, and how that changes the way Nick approaches figuring himself out. It kind of relieves some of the pressure he feels. Before that conversation, I think he probably felt like he had to know what his sexuality was before he could actually do anything about his developing crush, but that conversation helped him realize that it’s okay if all he knows is that he likes Charlie, and that the rest will fall into place in its own time.)

[@trixxartarchive7705]

The only thing is apparent Darcy's coming out story isn't as happy and I know if they do that story I am going to cry because I relate to Darcy soo much

[@zanechi]

You meant Tara. Darcy is a happy lesbian girl. Nothing could break her.

[@annaphallactic]

@@zanechi I think Trixxart is referring to a plot point in the webcomic. No spoilers, but it's not a happy story.

[@kay-jay1581]

Well Darcy came out to her family when she was like 11 or 12. She has a terrible family, huge jerks. But nothing explicit has been shown. Just that she doesn’t like them. Taran we haven’t seen her family but she seems to be doing fine.

[@ezequielmondada6427]

@@zanechi Darcy is the one with homophobic family in the comic

[@zanco6324]

in the comic tara has already told her family and they are very accepting of her Darcy is the one with the homophobic parents

[@Thislackspurpose]

Comparing Heartstopper with Euphoria (just because they’re both currently trending), there’s this really sharp contrast between the overall healthy and generally “normal” teenage experience we see in Heartstopper, and the more extreme, “dark” themes of Euphoria. In Heartstopper they’re having movie nights, they’re going bowling, we see loving parents, supportive teachers, etc… and yes - bullies as well. But it’s still a teenage experience that I can personally relate to (as a grown woman looking back, that is). Euphoria goes to such lengths, and while I do understand the appeal and why young adults find it compelling… it’s also kind of an anxiety inducing and stressful watch. I think that we could use more shows like Heartstopper not just for queer kids (though they are perhaps in most dire need of it), but for ‘all’ teenagers just wanting something positive and healthy to watch. I feel like so many tv series aimed at young adults these days are overtly “dark” and adult in their themes and I… I don’t know. Again, I get the appeal, I just think we could use a bit of balance. I’d like to see more wholesome shows all around. Escapism doesn’t have to be so dramatic, sometimes we just want a bit of joy. 🥺

[@xylypotatohead3947]

As someone who is straight and cis, I still related to it a lot and I think it is very beneficial for non queer children and teens and is a show that everyone needs imo. I honestly think it is a show for all teenage audiences, yes it focuses on queer stories but everyone can find something to relate to I think. Of course queer teens needed this show the most it was damn time, but I think esssentially it is still a show for everyone

[@Thislackspurpose]

@@xylypotatohead3947 I definitely agree with that. 🌸

[@kill4karma]

I feel like both shows are unrealistic in opposite directions but if I'm trying to escape my problems I much prefer no problems rather than just internalizing other people's problems. I prefer pure fluff, little conflict, type media and I'm so glad that this show has been such a success because I need more stuff like it.

[@sarahlelys9268]

It's something I'm seeing a lot in adult fiction as well, be it series or movies or books. In the past decade or so, it seems that "gritty" and "realistic" (a wrong word to use, since people usually mean "pessimistic") have become the standard, and the criteria by which a story's worth is measured. The grittiest the story, the better/more valuable. This is stupid, and absolutely despairing. I'm not sure there truly is beauty in a work of art that systematically presents life as hopeless, meaningless, deprived of fairness and beauty and sincerity. Sure, in theory it should enable people to deal with their trauma and tackle the ugly sides of life, but I find that it's actually just the new drama-making ploy for writers, and I wonder what sort of a society it's creating if the stories we consume to relax, unload, and escape ultimately just tell us that life will destroy us. I think Heartstopper is for everyone because it just gives so many happy vibes and this is what we need, all of us! (As a bi woman, I'm happy for the positive representation it finally gives of us to cishet people: it's good that for once our stories aren't tragic or "gritty." Please let us be happy to. Please let everyone in this world be happy.)

[@Thislackspurpose]

@@kill4karma I definitely hear you, but in all honesty, my teenage experience looked a lot more like Nick’s than anything I’ve seen in Euphoria, so to me it doesn’t come across as particularly unrealistic. I’m privileged to have grown up in a safe neighbourhood, I rather enjoyed going to school, and I had plenty of supportive adults to turn to, while still dealing with things that are difficult for teenagers. But I would understand if a person who had to face more challenges growing up than I had to felt that Heartstopper is a bit unrealistic. We all got different experiences and will be able to relate to different characters. ❤️ I’m sure euphoria has been an important series to a lot of young adults out there, too. But I definitely think a lot of people feel the way you feel, in terms of escapism. If you’re already feeling down, you might not be in the mood for a series where all the characters feel like sh•t. 😂

[@emmarubacava]

Just hoping that production companies will see just how popular adaptations of Alice’s books are will make them want to adapt Loveless for the screen then we will have ACE REPRESENTATION PEOPLE!

[@themagicpotato2943]

The fact that Aled isn’t in this show implies there might be a Radio Silence adaptation 👀 if that happens I’m sure loveless will be up for consideration too! As an ace person I’d very much love to see that happen

[@kay-jay1581]

Yeah all novels would be cool. Charlie and Nick, This winter, Solitaire, Radio Silence, Loveless.

[@glum006]

@@kay-jay1581 I hope they don’t adapt this winter or solitaire unless they change stuff. I feel like adapting them will just ruin heartstopper by showing everything wrong with Charlie.

[@rei02862]

@@glum006 how so?

[@glum006]

@@rei02862 Ik they are setting up the food problem, but I hope they don’t go too deep into it, and just skim over it like the comics. I feel like it is going to ruin the feel good and warm vibe of heartstopper. Probably just me, but just how I see it.

[@emailinabox2628]

As a bisexual woman I literally said that one of the most relatable moments is Nick getting 62% on the am I gay quiz. DAMN if that wasn't just the 19 y/o me

I strongly disagree that coming out stories can become outdated somehow. To confess our sexuality to people we love is always a risk, it always will be. To be out and proud will always attract some kind of vitriol. There will never be a time when coming out is not dangerous in one way or another and generations ahead will always need to see this kind of struggle portrayed in art.

[@Lisa_Flowers]

Right? I know a lot more people are able to just date who they want to date without labels or announcements but there are still a LOT of people who really cannot do that, or who feel like there is a value to communicating their feelings and thoughts to loved ones, facilitated in part by a label or 'coming out'. I can agree that maybe the focus on coming out stories should lessen as we explore other queer stories, but I don't think that means coming out stories are irrelevant or shouldn't be told anymore. I'd also love to see more stories from people who can't come out, still living their queer life in it's positive and negative complexities. I can't come out because of where I live, doesn't mean I stop being queer.

[@javencummins1426]

There are so many countries that still have same sex couples outlawed. It will be 100s of years before coming out is outdated.

[@editor4201]

I mean just because we're not there yet doesn't mean we'll never get there. Just look how far we've come in less than a generation. I absolutely think there will be a time when coming out is not that big a deal/isn't even really necessary - heck, it already isn't for some, and there's no reason to expect that trend not to continue as all signs point towards successive generations being more open towards/embracing of various orientations and forms of gender expression. I'm not saying we should stop telling coming out stories, just that it seems oddly reactionary to expect that the predominant view towards queerness will never evolve beyond where it is today.

[@juleskessler5243]

I think that asking for fewer coming out stories is aspirational, but not realistic. Yes, in an ideal world, coming out would never be a conflict. But we don’t live in that word, and so asking to minimize an experience that is still so central to queer identity is making it harder for queer people to see parts of themselves represented. I think heartstopper does a good job of representing both queer characters who are out and who are not, so that coming out is not everyone’s focus. And even the characters with coming out storylines have very different experiences. And that balance comes from just… having multiple queer characters instead of one. In the same way that (I would argue) it doesn’t count as bury your gays if there are many queer characters of different identities only some of whom die (and some queer relationships survive), it’s not just a coming out story if only some of the characters have to come out.

[@madisongraves4637]

As a closeted lgbtq teen in Texas, yeah, it's definitely still a risk, if I came out or even got too supportive of the lgbtq community I'd get kicked out of school.

[@mothturtle7897]

Elle was such a refreshing take on a trans character that as a cisgender person by the second or third episode I actually wondered if I'd somehow misunderstood that she was trans and had to do a quick Google search because I'm so used to it being the absolute focus of that character's plotline.

[@daphnea6238]

Omg yes so true i did the same

[@kanalkucker14]

This is actually something amazing about Alice Oseman's writing, she underplays huge things like that and doesn't make a fuss about them

[@maypickles2396]

I see it joked a lot on social media about young people's melancholy - effortlessly trying to put a fun spin on the pain of not being able to experience such 'fairy tale' queer love. the reality check of many people noting how there are far more used to the Ben's and Harry's of their school life even now. heartstopper is so bittersweet in that sense and you put it perfectly for that view across all agge groups. the amount of people rewatching the show for the queer joy it gives also reflect how many people need this sort of media in their life and how seeing it being out so publically is needed more and more in this political climate. also as a person on the ace spectrum, having read loveless too, i honestly don't know what i'd do with myself if we got such clear and joyous celebration of someone that is aroace as Alice would be bound to write and again the thought is filled with melancholy of even the possibility of representation being shown.

[@veravye]

I'm so excited to see what Alice will do with Isaac if with get a season 2!!! Having her said that her intention was for him to be aroace, i'm just so happy!! A lot of people are using Nick's scene to come out, and I would love to have something more specific to my situation of being aroace. Just the thought of having a positive representation of a character like me on a popular show really warms my heart. I can't begin imagine what good it would do

[@Tustin2121]

xxxxxx - Oh, she confirmed Issac was aroace? I got those vibes from him during season 1 (him with a book in every scene, just chilling as all this romance drama unfolds around him is a mood) and I was so worried they might not follow through with that going forward. So happy to hear otherwise!

[@bearwho216]

Hi Rowan, I wanted to contribute to what you said about the fact that even younger viewers of the show have been feeling melancholic towards the experiences portrayed. I’m 20 this year and it’s my first year at university where I’ve been able to distance myself from my very catholic family and acquaintances. In this time I’m increasingly coming to terms with my queer identity and I’m mostly feeling pretty good about it. I found a couple of friends with who I can openly discuss it and one of them is openly queer too. So like, I’m not exactly in crisis mode over it. Having said so, a part of the show that kind of shockingly left me in tears was Nick’s relationship with his mum. I realized, especially through his coming out scene, that I was never gonna be able to say to my mum “hey, I’m queer” and for her to embrace me and tell me that it was gonna be ok and she loved me all the same and nothing was gonna change. In that moment I felt like I was grieving something that I honestly hadn’t even realized I wanted in the first place. It doesn’t help that Sara Nelson is played by Olivia Colman who is an actual treasure of a human being and I love so much and looks like she would be the best mum and give the best hugs. P.S.: the soundtrack is so gooooooooood. I’ve been listening to the Spotify playlist basically non-stop for the last few days and it’s actually top notch whoever was in charge of it should get a pay raise!!

[@purpledaydreamer9682]

I feel that. My parents thankfully are mainly just uneducated and coming round little by little- I hope you can tell your parents one day and that things turn out OK, even if it takes it's time. But for what it's worth - you are seen, you are valid, you are loved. Sending you a big hug. You can do this

[@miche8868]

+

[@wmloxley]

I broke down watching that scene for the same reason, and had the exact same thoughts

[@menace4607]

Yeah, when I read the web comic that part was a gut punch to me too

[@liliflwrs]

Yeah for me reading the comic on webtoon and also the show felt the same thing about it as well

[@charlej2446]

"having gender envy over kit connor" ahh that hit hard haha

[@myfirstgirlfriendturnedint2524]

Honestly 😔

[@Rayxster]

I'm a 30 y/o who got curious about the show when it showed up, I know I'm not the target audience but it brought endless amount of closure to me, and rememering my days back when I was a smol baby queer in school, not knowing what in the world was going on. Charlie's "Gay Panic" homescreen is still a vibe even at the age of 30.

[@luciskies]

As a 30 year old bisexual I could def relate to Nick’s story! It was so nice seeing some bi representation and my teen self def felt validated. The Pirates of Caribbean scene was way too relatable hahaha. Anyoo, I’m so glad younger generations have relatable/optimistic queer media like Heartstopper💗💜💙 And you’re def not the only millennial who’s been reminiscing about their questioning/baby gay days thanks to this show. The closure is still healing decades later.

[@ynat2198]

in my mid 30s, bi, and can i tell you wow this show really brought back memories. some bad but mostly great ones. i remembered asking a girl out and being laughed at because i didn't “look bi”. but i remember my entire friend group was queer, supportive, weird, radical, everything i do not have as a queer adult anymore. I love this show and i don't think at all is limited to younger people and that's the beauty of it :) also the soundtrack is killer

[@samanthaw3845]

Lol same! 28yo bi girl here, and I have never felt so incredibly seen as I felt watching Nick’s journey in Heartstopper. ….my phone screen now also says gay panic lolol

[@luciskies]

@@ynat2198 aww I’m so sorry you had to go through that. You can’t tell someone’s sexuality based on how they look. And yes the music is amazing and on repeat this week ^.^

[@Sl1mch1ckens]

Im 24 my boyfriend is 28 and we both really loved it, we also watched euphoria but as we both said after watching this its just wholesome and sometimes we just want nice happy viewing.

[@lonelyjesse85]

I refuse to get my hopes up about a season 2 until it gets anounced. Netflix has cancelled shows with great numbers before while renewing struggling shows. Their decisions aren't always logical. At the very least we'll always have season 1

[@Tustin2121]

The thing I hate most about Netflix having this show is that it’s highly unlikely to get a DVD release, because I will often buy BlueRays of shows that I love just so that it’s not possible for me to lose them due to the whims of some lawyers or executives.

[@Octobris]

To be honest, a cancellation announced just for the sake of publicity (and later, a "change of heart" because of the outcry) wouldn't surprise me at all.

[@thaliaprincess3683]

they're so homophobic fr like the fact that they dont immediately announce S2 of heartstopper yet willingly funding like 4 movies of 365 days is just left me speechless

[@anonymousname5860]

@@thaliaprincess3683 I f*****g hate that series. Why? Just why? There are so many other series that are worthy of film adaptation.

[@thaliaprincess3683]

@@anonymousname5860 me too, i mean its fun seeing people reacting & making fun of the first movie cause sometimes you just wanna watch something dumb & shallow but i cant believe netflix decided it was a good idea to produce more of that like i've never seen a company so eager to make absolutely trash contents

[@emmarubacava]

I cannot stop watching it. I cannot stop listening to the soundtrack. I cannot stop rereading the graphic novels. I cannot stop looking up behind the scenes stuff on Instagram. Is this addiction? Am I okay?

[@jdd0815]

You’re not the only one. I’ve watched it 9 times, read the graphic novels 4 times and have had the Spotify playlist on repeat. Several of my other gay friends have also watched it as much as I have. It’s not an addiction, it’s therapeutic.

[@LainesPEIWilds]

I don’t know, but you’re not alone!!

[@spooniefullofsugar172]

I feel so empty when I'm not watching 🤣😭

[@titikshachakraborty9094]

You're not alone in the madness 😉

[@glum006]

I stopped counting how many times I’ve read/watched it. I started reading her novellas and novels that include heartstopper characters. They are all good so far

[@n4musica]

I LOVE the fact that Nick knows from basically the start that he’s in love with Charlie, even if he wasn’t sure of his sexuality. It’s so important for young people to know that you don’t have to have it all figured out to follow your heart

[@susanmallet766]

"You don't have to understand your feelings completely to know you like something. You don't have to always have figured everything out. You can just feel." -Nick Nelson, Season 2, Episode 5

[@redactedredacted6656]

I watched a lot of gay media in my early teens where the love interest showing interest in the 'opposite' gender was treated as a red flag and short hand to suggest they're unreliable, impulsive and untrustworthy. This impacted the way I saw myself as a bi person. I thought that if potential partners knew about my sexuality it would cause me to be rejected. Seeing a character be entirely accepting of their love interest's bisexuality felt so refreshing and heartwarming. I wish I saw that when I was younger. We're light years away from Glee.

[@Sl1mch1ckens]

Bi trans man here, and im glad for better trans and bi rep, atleast now when trans kids google movies/tv shows with trans characters boys dont cry might not be the first movie they watch because that is nightmare fuel for a fresh trans kid.

[@fendrikdrake3320]

"Many older viewers feel a sense of longing or even jealousy for a teen experience they could have had." Oh so it's not just me then...neat

[@SketchLove]

Nope in fact there's a subreddit called r/heartstoppersyndrome entirely about people being both happy and jealous of Charlie and Nick getting what they wanted when they were their age.

[@fendrikdrake3320]

@@SketchLove holy hell, I didn't expect that many people😅 Thx for the tip

[@michaelwright1295]

@@SketchLove i mean ffs I AM their age and I'm jealous🤚

[@lpchambers3681]

I just turned 18 and this show, while awesome, made me feel that I had messed up because I didn’t and now couldn’t have that as a teenager.

[@ilikecheesecake5682]

my mum is a lesbian in her 60s and she adores heartstopper. it made her feel so validated and hopeful

[@juicybutterriblydrab]

Even though I definitely felt that mourning experience at first (well actually only after my second go round lol), I think what's helped me get over it somewhat is to remember that a relationship like Nick and Charlie's at that age is unlikely no matter your sexuality. Yes it's shit that we don't get to have those formative years of experimentation in dating when everyone else does but, even if we did have access to that freedom to try things out without fear, the likelihood that we'd stumble into the perfect relationship at 15 may as well be zero because after all, as I think you mentioned Yasmin Finney said, the show is a fantasy. The best thing is that where straight people have had this fantasy on screen for decades we're finally being given the same. Anyway, how much longer should I leave it before I start my third watch through?

[@4immerda]

Wow, thank you, well put. That actually kinda helped with the melancholy problem 😅

[@Tustin2121]

My subsequent watch throughs are happening mainly via react channels. There’s a lot of queer reactors watching and crying and giving other perspectives of what they find most poignant in the series. (It helps make up for the fact that I don’t have any friends to actually share this with and watch them react in the same way.)

[@KatelynJoe]

Part of me wants to say that yes it is fantasy, because for the majority it is! …but my parents have been together since they were 14 & 16 and still daily make the same giddy heart eyes at each other just like nick and Charlie do, so a part of me does feel this melancholy on such a personal level with them being the ideal growing up. Not to say they are perfect but idk it just is a bit sad for me now at 27 wishing I could have had that too. 💚✨ I understand it is fantasy but for some it was their reality…

[@juicybutterriblydrab]

@@KatelynJoe yeah but you must realise your parents are such a tiny minority, especially for current generations most people of any sexuality don't stay with their high school sweetheart forever, or even have such a healthy relationship full of good communication, understanding and grace during high school at all.

[@KatelynJoe]

@@juicybutterriblydrab oh yes, I definitely agree it’s a very small minority and very rare! 🙌 I suppose I just wanted to point out it isn’t impossible either? And even if it does happen for that small amount it isn’t something that is the perfectly ideal or what is best for the majority. So I see both sides is all and as much as it would have been cool to have found that like in heartstopper or my parents, love isn’t defined by the age in which it is found so here is to us all finding love in its many forms in this life. 🥰🌈💚✨

[@belh9587]

in heartstopper i felt so seen as a 15 year old gay British teen in year 10 so i hope more shows like this come out

[@IsraelLlerena]

Im so glad youve gotten to feel that way ! Just finished the show today and it’s genuinely one of the best things I’ve seen

[@Lola-wq9hn]

I really envy those who are crystal clear about their sexuality and who can easily determine whether they have romantic feelings for others. I’ve been so confused about my feelings and sexuality for years… it’s not a good experience to have😭

[@iainwhite8617]

Who says you have to be. Sexuality is complicated and not everyone fits in to a neatly designed box. That's what the + in LGBTQ+ is for, sexuality and gender Identity is fluid, ever-shifting and constantly being redefined, as it should because everyone's unique and there's no one size fits all category. There's no deadline, no test you have take, no time limit, and no one to answer but you. Take your time, figure things out at your own pace, stop overthinking and just go with the flow. If you don't fit in any categories, stop trying, just be your own beautiful person.

[@moeshrooms385]

I’ve been out as bisexual for years and still manage to question my sexuality at least a couple times a year. I’m not even all that fond of using the label for myself to begin with, I just do for simplicity. And don’t even get me started on trying to tell the difference between platonic and romantic attraction☠️☠️

[@phadenswandemil4345]

Damn the mourning of not having a happy queer childhood is definitely why, even though I think heartstopper is the most wholesome thing ever, i sometimes find it hard to watch. I just started uni. It's kinda weird that i feel like I'm just only starting to "come of age" when my cishet friends seem midway in their journey.

[@Blirre]

Life is about self discovery. That's what I think. You're very early compared to those people who realize what makes them happy at 40 or even way later.

[@phadenswandemil4345]

@@Blirre Yes it's not that bad. Just a little lonely, is all. Kinda feel left out by my other friends.

[@astoldbynickgerr]

@@phadenswandemil4345 I sooo feel you

[@elsagranquist9755]

i know exactly what you mean. In my first year of uni now and it feels so weird/odd/embarrassing that i’ve only really started living at 19 years old, when most of my friends were doing these things at like 14

[@andshescallingacab4346]

THISSSS. i love the show, but as somebody who finishes uni in a couple of months and only THEN i think i will start living fully as my beautiful trans bisexual self, i can’t help but feel jealous. that they live in a pretty queer friendly country and are allowed to have their crushes at 14 while i’ll be falling in love in secret due to homophobia well into my 20s for the first time. it’s sucks, but i can’t stop watching and imagining and hoping that other kids will have it easier

[@sydneywolpert]

this is the first show that once i finished I immediately started again, truly couldnt get enough of it. I resonated with the characters so deeply. An experience doesnt need to be super graphic to convey the sparks of a budding romance!

[@daeken]

I feel like Heartstopper was exactly what I needed to help my inner child heal. I'm in my 30s and only came out as trans a few years ago, after years of self-denial. Seeing queer stories *not* centered on trauma would've made such a difference for me. I've watched it three full times now, and every time I cry so many happy tears; I love that kids these days get this 🥺

[@alexbattaglia8297]

im so proud of you for coming out! i wish i was brave enough to be public

[@superdrwholock]

I so could've done with a show like this when I was a kid, I'm only 20 but I've noticed such a change from how we talk about these kind of things. Yes there are still homophobes and transphobes (being trans I very much am aware of that lol) but there is hope for the future and I really hope that kids in the future won't have all the struggles I had and still have to deal with the trauma of now, not being allowed to be yourself and express yourself and being forced to be someone you're not can really mess a person up and I hope soon that LGBT+ people won't have to deal with so much crap

[@beauregarden]

On the coming out discourse, I've never come out directly to my parents (I'm 29 and began questioning around 18) because I've always told myself I don't need to as I'm privileged enough to know 100% that they'll support me no matter what. The thing is, I've found myself becoming sobbingly emotional recently whenever I encounter a positive parental coming out scene/story (the last of which I sobbed hysterically at was Nick coming out to his mum). So I realised that it's probably something I need to do. I'm pretty sure they know already, but it's not for them, it's for me. That'll be my pride month project haha Honestly, I think coming out stories are kind of important because they allow the audience to test-run how the scenario might play out. Or on the otherhand, to vicariously come out if they are not ready to or unable. This show was so sweet and lovely, I wish we had shows like this to watch when we were teenagers. Even though I'm far from being a teenager now, shows like this and She-ra have really helped me come to terms with myself in ways that no shows ever did back then. LGBT+ rep in those days was always gritty, dark and 18+...and always had depressing endings :p

[@Blirre]

Your comment made me wonder if I should talk to my mom again too. When I initially told her she was going through some personal stuff and it was too much and she took it hard. I know she supports me but we've never really gone back to that conversation, only just breached it peripherally a bit. I always cry when I see these shows and movies about acceptance, so maybe some closure is what I need too. Edit. I forgot to say. I'm in my 30s and I'm not sure I'm completely comfortable with my same-sex feelings because I've only ever seen tragedy or drama in queer media. I'm trying to learn that it's possible to be happy in a queer relationship too, and this show certainly helps a bit.

[@ampersandcastle1091]

@@Blirre I relate to your comment so much. My parents are supportive of gay rights but I got outed as bisexual to them when I was 14 by my best friend’s mum. My mum confronted me about it on a long car ride. I can’t even remember what was said, I just remember it being the scariest and worst moment of my life. She wasn’t exactly accepting, she definitely thought I was too young. We haven’t spoken about it since. Im 18, and the scene where Nick comes out to his mum hit me so hard because i think (or hope) it’s exactly how it would go down if I got to come out to her now, on my own terms. Maybe I will in the future.

[@Blirre]

@@ampersandcastle1091 Even though it might feel a bit silly at this point I think you should do it properly. It's different for parents when it's their own kid because they worry about your life being harder. I think you need to hear what your mother thinks to get some closure on the issue.

[@daneroberts1996]

Before I came out to my parents I watched coming-out scenes so i could have an array of 'possible responses' i could get, and figure out how to prepare for each one. Still, in the end I've only been able to come out to them by writing it down, and they were loving and supportive but we've never spoken about it face to face :(

[@beauregarden]

Update: So if anyone is interested, I did it. They were very supportive and told me they'd known for years and were waiting for me to say something first. Thanks to this video and Heartstopper for giving me the nudge I needed

[@PokhrajRoy.]

Rowan, you are the ‘Heartstopper’ of KZbin (among other channels) and I would love to thank you for your Queer Affirming Channel. I’ve never felt more proud to be Queer after watching the show and more so after I saw the reactions on Twitter and seeing the subsequent solidarity.

[@10mimu]

Does that make Contrapoints the 'Euphoria' of KZbin lol (even the colour palette of the videos kinda align...)

[@marsie9950]

4e

[@Amm2187_]

I’m in the US, and after the Roe v. Wade leak last night and the discussion of risks to Obergefell v. Hodges as a result, I really needed this wholesome, beautiful video essay today ❤️❤️

[@jessieclass9680]

The wholesome content we need to get through difficult times

[@embop1266]

yes!!! as a floridian high school student, i was in deep need of both heartstopper and this video

[@adaminflux]

I believe Mr. Ajayi’s story will speak to adults who lament trying to find love later in life.

[@dw7896]

Especially in the second and third seasons, wink wink Paris trip

[@authordistopia4379]

A a queer teen growing up in the us south I really sympathize with this wistful longing for an ability to experience (not just a romance) but a friendship like those shown in the show. I feel so much like I want to be myself but I know if I “come out” I could jeopardize my relationship with many of my friends, teachers, and extended family. I feel like many people who are tiered of the “coming out” trop either have come out already or are in a place where coming out is not as hard of a thing. To an extent I feel envy for those people. Sometimes I will just be talking to someone and feel like I am really connecting with them when I remember that if I expose too much of myself I will become just a “gay” body to be debated or ignored. Funnily, I know there will be some small support where I live, but I know I will also become “The Gay.” My friendships would become token clicks, and other friend groups would have to tiptoe around these facts as to not hurt anyone. (Sorry this is so long 😕) But I to an extent feel torn from my own sense of history because of this. There is a community where I live and a history to that community, yet I cannot be apart of it (at least not as I am.) I love so many of the people here. They can be so loving and understanding but only so far. I feel as if I could only steal them away from the rest of our broken country for just a moment that they could grow and let everyone in, but I know truthfully that our broken world is so fundamental to their selves that I all I can do is wait for time to fix things. Sorry again for rambling 🤷 But I hope everyone has a lovely day being gay 😊😄🏳️‍🌈!!!

[@astoldbynickgerr]

As someone who is still in the closet, I hear you! Your comment resonated deeply with me-it brought tears to my eyes. Thank you 💙

[@lpchambers3681]

As a mostly closeted Bi teen from the South, SAME to everything you said. Glad I’m not alone it feeling that.

[@syllc.209]

The call to stop producing coming out stories is like stopping coming of age stories.

[@daneroberts1996]

I feel like the only people who want to stop coming out stories either a) only read/watch the bad ones, or b) have forgotten what it was like to be closeted and how valuable coming out stories are in those times

[@chriskagamine358]

I was so excited when I heard Girl in Red and Orla Gartland. Episode 2 had a fantastic soundtrack

[@ellie9635]

I nearly cried so many times during Nick's storyline. I came out as bisexual at at the same time Charlie was outed and am now the age of the actors in the series (help a-levels), so everything felt so real. Even though it was only a relatively small amount of time ago in the grand scheme of things the melancholy still hit hard. Also as a questioning (ftm) person, it also hit really hard realising I'm never going to get the experience of being a boy at school. But god I love this show so much

[@fantasticfrances]

I got outed as a lesbian in year 10 and am now doing A-levels too.

[@ampersandcastle1091]

@@fantasticfrances I got outed as bi in year 10 and I’m doing A Levels too lmao. We’re all livening the same life in different fonts. Good luck with your exams!

[@fantasticfrances]

@@ampersandcastle1091 thank you I’m deffo gonna need it, good luck to you too x

[@By_Ash_Away]

I hope to write more about this sometime, but what I really appreciated about this show is its unwillingness to be overly cruel to the audience. There are so many moments where a lesser show would have done a painful, predictable move - like, for example, when Charlie runs off at Harry's party and runs into Ben, a worse show would have had them kiss while Charlie is so emotionally vulnerable over Nick's perceived crush on Tara. But no - instead, Charlie firmly tells Ben to leave him alone, not to touch him. I felt so much relief in that moment, and it was a sign I could relax with this show overall. It's not going to be orchestrating artificial, uncomfortable drama for shock value or ~*angst*~.

[@daneroberts1996]

a different show would have ended the episode right at the angstiest moment, but this one reassures the viewer that this story is different before the episode is through

[@alexmooney7474]

That feeling happened so many times for me, and I think that's why I love this show so much. The Imogen date situation could have been played so differently, as an example. When Nick straight up told Charlie what had happened while they were standing in front of the claw machine, my jaw dropped. Actual COMMUNICATION? And REASONABLE RESPONSES? A lack of "drama for drama's sake"?! It feels so beautiful and rare.

[@By_Ash_Away]

@@alexmooney7474 YES! I totally forgot about the date situation, but that was such a good example of something that could have caused so much angst but was solved by …talking it through ?? Love it

[@lilyavabrooks]

Yes, I also felt a huge wave of relief at that point!

[@avivastudios2311]

I've seen people mention this before. It's weird how little conflict this show has I'd rather watch H2O.

[@Lisa_Flowers]

I'm not a teen but this was really healing for me as someone who has been intensely depressed by everything that's been happening around the world, and in my own country (which is eons behind queer rights, they aren't even any rights to take away). I'm not directly represented (Black, nonbinary, gay) but seeing queer people being happy even when facing challenges was something I really needed. I also appreciate both Tara Jones and Elle, it's rare to see Black queer women specifically represented much at all, let alone as clearly likeable, let alone in teen shows. Edit: I also really appreciate what you said at the end about young queer people. As stated i'm not a teenager, i'm in my early twenties, but i'm still not in a place where I get to experience any freedom with my queerness. I'm not out and maybe never will be because of the country I live in. I've never asked a girl out and don't know when or if I ever will. I can't ask people to use my pronouns or dress the way I want to. I live with people people are transphobic and homophobic for the foreseeable future. So I really resonate with what you said about queer teens knowing they won't experience a happy queer youth, but also having no assurance if they ever will because they currently don't. It's valid to grieve not having experienced that when you were younger, but there's also the experience of grieving that you may never have that at all. That it really is just a fantasy that feels all too out of reach.

[@crakandra9672]

I know it's not much but im also nonbinary and kinda still on that gender journey too. (This comment might be the first time im actually saying it outside of my head) I also don't have the courage to even ask people to stop using she/her pronouns even the ones closest to me who'd do their best. I just wanted to not only thank you writing this comment but also say you're not alone 🤗

[@katiehanna90]

Heartstopper is legitimately changing me as a person. I never realized how much I'd internalized the message that being queer means I *have* to have a sad life, until I saw this show.

[@ashleyhamman]

That part about missing out on what we didn't get hits hard. I just want to live my life, but not MY life, the one that I could have had if A: I had been educated on trans-ness early on and told "Hey, this is an ok thing." and transitioned in my early teens, or B: the on in which I was born with the correct body. It is pretty incredible how even just the difference of ten years has seen the LGBT+ scene entirely change. Where around 2006-2014, we were told "These are these bits that determine you, and here's how they work." and LGBT+ stuff being some "other" weird group of people, I'm amazed by the absolute explosion of communities across the internet that have tons of teens going "I think I'm this, oh hey, you have Discord roles for pronouns? Thank you so much!"

[@mxar2074]

Heartstopper was realeased right as I turend 20, exciting teenage-hood. I watched an Episode and realized "damn I'm too old for this, this was made for younger teens". However as I continued watching the show I realized something, I was always expetcting something "bad" to happen. It made me really sad, because I realized that I was so used to the "bury your gays " trope, queerbaiting and melodramatic lesbian period dramas that I was honestly not expecting a happy end. Hopefully younger kids will have more shows like this to look up to in the future.

[@maddummel]

The part about feeling joy for queer teens now while also mourning our own teenage experience made me cry so much. It hurts but also makes my heart warm that there's so many people in the world who relate to it the same way

[@asthargf]

I feel that too. What awakened inside me is the possibility of healing thanks to this show and the webcomic, and this type of stories in general, while it sets a positive and healthy precedent for present and future generations.

[@darkishphoenix]

I'm a 42-year-old gay man and what you talked about at the end really resonated with me. A lot of what they experienced like that electric touch of fingers happened later at uni and it certainly made me wish I had a high school experience where I could have gone through that, so as much as I loved it, it was also bittersweet. But it also made me happy that things are better for queer kids today and they have shows like this to affirm their experiences when I did not.

[@Sentientmatter8]

The representation of queer solidarity in this is PHENOMENAL.

[@kanalkucker14]

yesss!!!

[@helena4903]

it really hit me when you said that the kind of subtle bullying charlie experiences is things that, if you went to an adult or someone else and told them about it, it would seem innocent. it took me YEARS to articulate properly why the things my friends said to me in high school hurt so much and i still doubt whether i was just being too sensitive or making it all up. you articulated that feeling perfectly

[@Ch4dL4nd]

Heartstopper melted my heart. I'm so grateful to Alice for creating it and can genuinely feel the care that went into its creation. The whole show is the warm hug that I've been craving for years; and to get it all at once, while watching the show, was so overwhelming that I cried. I felt the melancholy a lot of other viewers had as well, but pulled myself out of it by reminding myself that it's always possible to find supportive friends, people who will respect you, and love that is unabashedly pure no matter where you are in your life. This show is more than a show for so many of us. It is a smile. It is hope. It is love that constantly says to the viewer "you are amazing." and I believe it.

[@MrJerryoseattle]

Rowan, you have provided the most comprehensive and thoughtful analysis of Heart Stopper that I have seen. Your interview of Alice and the writer regarding the “Pride” anthology was also a treat to watch. As a 70 year old gay man who did not even have a vocabulary available to describe my attraction to guys when in high school, and whose university years onwards were consumed by both the tragedy of the Aids epidemic and the amplified homophobia that accompanied it, I have felt some grief at missing out on the experience portrayed in this series. But even more than my grief, I feel a strength and obligation to push back against our current cultural failures in not providing safe and inclusive life opportunities for everyone. Skin color, orientation and gender should not make any person feel unsafe nor unimportant. Charlie’s dialogue with Tori about feeling the world would be better off without him should never have to be thought by anyone. I challenge those of us who are grown up enough to not be so easily dismissed to take the lead in electing compassionate leaders and in bravely and publicly speaking up against folks seeking to dismiss or diminish the value of anyone.

[@BrownsBacker]

I'm 65 and gay....once married to a woman because it's what you did in the 1970's....and I am the biggest fan of this series....I cry everytime I watch it and the numerous reaction videos I have had no control over watching. The simplicity and honesty cuts through the BS and the denials of a lifetime. Yes, this is meant for a young adult and teen audience, but it also touches those of us far past our prime with a cathartic, nearly therapeutic, vision of what we could have been in a more enlightened time ...happysad. But, it also gives hope for better things to come, new pages yet to be read....at my age I've seen a thousand gay rom-coms and dramas...I never cried during Broke back Mountain or Moonlight, but this show reduces me to tears nearly every episode, everytime. It shocked me. It has been become a cathartic and visceral reaction that I not only expect, but need in my life. In the 1970's in high school or college, gay sex was available (especially with straight farm boys who just wanted to get off...a community of Bens). But love and romance were for straight people....when your formative years makes you feel that the only human contact you can have is meant to be physically satisfying, but emotionally damaging....it does affect your life and your subsequent relationships. Those you love become less attractive sexually because love and sex aren't meant to exist together....for our kind. 💔 This show would've changed my life when I was at the age of the characters and cast. I am so happy that it exists not just for the young, but for those of us much older to realize that we still have more work to do to allow us to find our own happy ending....life is a process, and it's not over until you give up on it ...and this show gives me hope. ❤️❤️❤️

[@lucillelacroix2735]

Okay, I think I understand why I cried so much watching this show now

[@janevim11]

as someone who also had that oh. /oh./ while watching pirates of the carribean (granted I did have a hunch I was bi, just all the women I liked so far were asian idols, so I wasn't really 100% sure how much it counted), I felt the absolute euphoria of representation when watching that scene. 10/10

[@angelspit]

Between this and our flag I feel like we’ve had a great few months of queer media and representation

[@pedrocsheen]

the teachers relationship on the comics is my favorite thing i need a full comic about them

[@krisstianhastie5119]

I love that the one character to stand out as traditionally queer or flamboyant in my eyes was Tao, its nice to see they didn't include common tropes to the characters. They're just people who like the same or opposite gender no stereotyping just inclusive of one another!!

[@jraqn]

Ik, I always get queer vibes from Tao, I think mostly from the fact that he just is the way he is and he strays so far away from typical cishet stereotypes that it feels like he shouldn’t be cishet himself. I love this shows easy willingness to break stereotypes and stay away from cliches, without feeling performative or like it’s trying too hard to be “woke”. Like the representation is absolutely wonderful and incredibly diverse without feeling like it’s checking boxes, and the characters that don’t need to check them get just the same amount of personality and treatment.

[@tabithaaf]

it’s interesting you bring up the idea of coming out stories being something that queer ppl aren’t loving anymore because i have had that thought, but i LOVE heartstopper and never felt for a second any of the animosity i have towards other coming out shows/movies. i think the difference in this circumstance is that it feels like nick’s coming out focuses on him as a person and his process of self discovery and the choice to come out vs how other queer “coming out” stories are about how the straight ppl around them will react to this thing they already know about themself. it feels different to watch a coming out story BY queer ppl FOR queer ppl.

[@ramdi5070]

I resonate with the statement at the end: that not only the older queer folks feel envious of that sweet teenage love story but younger queer people too. I live in a quite queerphobic country, I'm an ace agender lesbian and I just wish I could have what Nick and Charlie or Tara and Darcy have. I can't stop envying those who have experienced that.

[@sincerecinnamon]

I absolutely love heartstopper, and I'm a queer 8th grader, but as my friend would say, I'm so closeted that I'm in narnia. But the closet I went into narnia is transparent to a degree because many in my school have figured it out while I don't feel like I'm completely okay to come out, and although I'm not directly being bullied for it, there is a sort of sour feeling in my school towards gay people, constant gay jokes and stuff like that. In addition, I do have a crush on someone who I feel a mutual connection with, but they're across the country. I can't have a dreamy heartstopper romance because I can't be out and my potential Charlie is hours away and only available through a screen. Either way, I love the story, but with all that is shown in the show and comics, I wish it was that easy.

[@peaches65835]

Its just so nice to see emotionally healthy relationships in a romantic show - queer or otherwise. I wish there had been more representation of this aspect of relationships when I was younger.

[@obliviousred]

I'm kind of glad Heartstopper has been brought queer grief into broader conversation, because I've honestly had a hard time finding people who openly talk about mourning the queer experiences they didn't have when they were younger. Like, you can find people talking about grief if they had to leave a spouse when they came out or something, but not the regret of closeting, suppression, and not coming out sooner. My grieving process started well before Heartstopper, but most of my queer friends don't relate because they were out relatively young. I'm glad to feel like I'm not alone in that experience now.

[@pokemario112]

As someone who much like Charlie was outed, bullied so much and broken down by the people who were called my peers, I found myself relating to both Nick and Charlie. Nick who went home opened up the internet and asked what it meant to be queer. I was 12, nothing like the 16 year old Nick who looked into the negative side of being queer because I couldn't look beyond the fact that I wasn't...normal. I cried like he did when that silly quiz told me I was very gay. I wondered if I could live pretending to be straight. I listened to Lady Gaga and cried at all the movies that were considered "feminine". Sure those aren't things that make you gay but to a 12 year old what else do you have. Through my journey of self discovery I learned a lot about myself but then like Charlie I was outed which destroyed me. I smiled through it and gave up on any dreams of happiness. Queer happiness is important because if I saw Heartstopper at 12 I wouldn't have thought that I wasn't normal, I wouldn't have been as broken by my outing. Stories like this change and save lives. Videos like this one do too. At 12 I didn't think I could find happiness. I didn't in High School. But around 2 years ago at the age of 18 on the tail end of Sixth Form I met the most amazing man. And yes, it doesn't get better fast. But it gets better. And even if we can't all find our Nick and Charlie or Tara and Darcy or Elle and Tao romances in high school that doesn't mean that they don't exist. It gets better. We will find happiness and we will live in that happiness. Queer happiness matters. Always. Thank you for the wonderful video Rowan.

[@lauramathews3151]

30 yo cishet new mom. Binge watched this yesterday. So full of wholesome heartwarming honesty. No corn or cheese. Absolutely lovely. I can't wait til my toddler is older and we can watch things like this together. Netflix definitely needs to source more stories and produce content like this. I want my kid(s) to be raised with diverse and inclusive love stories. But shows that lack too much grit to be shown to young audiences are scarce as you have said. Whether my kid(s) grow up to be members of the rainbow coalition or just appreciate the rainbows as observers, I want them to be the kind of people who wouldnt be silent or complicit, but true allies. Hard to do anecdotally and hypothetically without media portrayals and real life experience/ acquaintances/relationships.

[@erinh9267]

people saying things like this directly to netflix can change programming, especially when they're vulnerable and going through great change with the market; go copy-paste your comment to them, please

[@lauramathews3151]

@@erinh9267 where does one comment to Netflix?

[@vivekmenon795]

Beautiful review. Queer representation aside, I am grateful for Heartstopper in an age of dating apps and hookup culture, for reminding me how beautiful innocent teenage love can be. Never before has a show simply depicted healthy and supportive ways of being a partner in a relationship. I am so excited to celebrate love again, after years of hardening and suppression. Most of us in the gay community were once a wide-eyed Charlie, who never had the self-respect to stand up to a Ben and manifest a Nick Nelson, but instead encouraged and repeated the toxic behaviour we saw in the people who first broke our hearts for repressed reasons.

[@Davidbowie-rk3hq]

You know watching Heartstopper has been both melancholic and hopeful at the same time for me. I live in a small country in Central America with a 89% of our population having strong religious beliefs, which as might guess means queerness is usually frowned upon. So as I was watching the series I was happy, a smile usually appeared in my face as I binged watched the series one night, but a small feeling of sadness appeared as well. I realize that my high school experience would not be like this and had not been like this since the beginning . I feel like so many emotions have been prohibited and even stolen by the fact that I am gay, it made me even sadder to think that I can not trust my friends as it is difficult to know their reaction if I come out. But at the same time a overpowering feeling of hope has appeared after watching heartstopper, I only have one year left before I finish school and I am doing everything I can to leave the country and this series gives me hope that if I do get out of here I will have the adolecence that I feel has been stolen, that I will have friends that will accept me and that I will be free, free to walk hearing my favorite music, free to go to a beach whenever I can, free to love. It might be a big dream but what matters is the hope that has come with this series. I thank everybody involved in this project because it has brought me hope that I will be able to be myself. Now if you will excuse me I will go and rewatch the series again.

[@erinh9267]

most high school relationships don't last (queer or not); the friendships in Heartstopper show us a lot about building healthy, strong relationships with people; the lines about getting friends at Higgs by not hiding 'or I'd be alone (...)' and about 'never let anyone make you disappear, Charlie' are for you; connect with safe, kind people whom you like and who like you; build; you've got this; romance can actually be more likely and more robust when you have many healthy friendship

[@dafriii]

I cried so much while watching the show even tho its suposed to be very happy. I'm 16 and started cuestioning my sexuality when I was 10 (got comfortable with it at 15). My journey even tho it was way longer was very similar to Nick's and it made me really sad cause I wish I had that representation when I was younger. No one around me was queer and until I was 12 I didn't even know there existed more sexualities that just straight, gay and lesbian, that confused me a lot at the time even tho I now know I am a lesbian. Also what you said at 42:39 is exactly how I have been feeling. The knowing I'm never gonna have that is really depressing. I have been a fan of the comics for a while but seeing actual people having these experiences was really owerwhelming. Sorry for this long coment just don't have any friends I can talk to about this lol

[@dolfuny]

Bruh I cry from things that are supposed to be happy all the time, I just get so emotional lol

[@kay-jay1581]

Oh so do I specially with animated series. I have a deep connection to art so I fell in love with HeartStopper comic almost 2 years ago. And seen it come to life has been overwhelming joy. And the added scenes for Tara And Darcy have been so great. I love this series.

[@OliverHeikkinen]

I wish I got to have the experiences portrayed in Heartstopper. Kissing in the rain, secretly holding hands in a movie theater, being saved by a bully. Instead the more relatable queer teen experience is Jules riding her bike to a motel to have sex with a middle-aged man who's using her.

[@Sarcasmhime]

It was so refreshing to NOT see any contrived misunderstanding drama. Everybody actually communicated and that shouldn't be so rare in film/TV, but it is.

[@mcfrog5473]

Something else I really appreciated was how there weren’t any female characters trying to sabotage the relationship between Nick and Charlie, because that feels like such an overused trope. Surely there’s the storyline with Imogen, and she starts out a bit misguided, but she actually respects Nick’s feelings and even looks happy when she sees him going off with Charlie in the last episode. It allows for the queer story to not still revolve around a straight relationship.

[@moeshrooms385]

I was so worried Imogen was going to become some kind of cliché antagonist and I’m really so incredibly glad she didn’t.

[@sandrasara1321]

i'm 24 and i do feel melancholy and jelousy about this teen romance that i will never have. i love this show and adore sweetness of the story, but it really makes me sad at the same time. i am going to rewatch it a lot of times just so i can feel those emotions myself, becouse it never had happened to me and never will. i have never feel like this after any show. this is so strange.

[@megsnets]

As an aroace 16 year old it makes me extremely happy that there could be an aroace storyline in heartstopper. The show already made me so happy and felt like a breath of fresh air from shows that only show queer pain. It also felt like a show that actually acknowledged my existence (maybe because it was written by an aroace author) because it was about a lot of the different identities in the queer community. Even though my identity wasn’t mentioned at all it just felt like a show about the queer community that doesn’t ignore people who aren’t gay.

[@mikaylaeager7942]

Am I the only one that watched Love, Victor when it came out? It seems like the only time anyone brings it up is to go after Disney (rightfully so) for refusing to put it on Disney+. That aside though, I feel like it was a really sweet age-appropriate queer teen drama that no one ever talks about.

[@daneroberts1996]

Heartstopper felt like Love Victor but even sweeter, British, and with better less cringey dialogue 😅. I'm sad that Love Victor is ending in a couple months, and i think i read that it's finally coming back to D+

[@ameliapc3943]

notion and heartstopper. - my two favourites things - also water because tori says hydration

[@pauieeepau]

I've been seeing tweets about "this was my Heartstopper" and it's edgy adult stuff not that accessible to teens or kids. I don't know the intents of such tweets, but I think we should have both. Some aimed at queer kids, some aimed at queer adults. I want to see even more lgbtq teen content going forward. (I have Heartstopper next to Check Please!, Legend of Korra, Monstress, Kill Six Billion Demons, and Old Guard in my shelf, so I obviously like both kinds of contents lol.)

[@babydollface]

When Nick says to Charlie that he wishes he had met met when he was younger and known then what he does know, that hit me hard. I really love this show, it's the sweetest thing ever!

[@justtippinmytophat2u647]

40:21 laughing so much at "gender envy over Kit Connor", so true 😆

[@armandoraulmatosvergara1379]

Sorry for my ignorance but what did she mean with that comment about kit Connor ?

[@grammerincorrect]

@@armandoraulmatosvergara1379 I think it’s that he has a certain look, which someone might envy in a way that is about his gender presentation

[@dw7896]

I mean tbh who *doesn't* have gender envy over Kit Connor?

[@Denuhm]

As someone who is near Alice's age (no where near David Opie yet though), I really found the comics (and Solitaire) extremely relatable and compelling. These kids lived the life I WANTED, the things I NEEDED to see and hear at their age. They are showing people like me, living now in 2022 that there are people experiencing the things that I went through. When I heard that this was going to be a Netflix adaptation, I was terrified, I was so worried we'd have yet another trope filled series. What I got was something that made me sob for hours. Seeing what I couldn't have was like being punched in the gut repeatedly. Seeing how happy and in love they are made me hold my partner and cry. It gave me hope. Something that in the recent climate has been extremely scarce. And the worst part was that I knew the story going in. I wasn't new to the world that Oseman created, I had read Solitaire, I own the original nick and charlie comics, I have the novellas. I knew this story and it still had such a profound effect on me to SEE it on screen.

[@Chikorita2Chante]

I'm 7 minutes in and struggling to hold in tears. The way this show touched me was, and still is, palpable. It is so refreshing to see a wholesome teen show that isn't aged and edged up.

[@nyssazo-el185]

I started crying when they played girl in red because I never thought I would hear her music in a TV show. The soundtrack was so amazing and also reflective of what queer teens maybe listen to

[@spaceyBISH]

Before watching Heartstopper I didn’t realize what I was missing in terms of wholesome rom com representation. When I was in high school finding out my sexuality I remember the only show I watched that had positive gay representation was Modern Family. It was amazing to see Mitch and Cam just living their lives knowing I could also have a nice suburban life was reassuring, but it is hard to relate to two grown men in a relationship with a child as a gay high schooler. Not to mention shows like Grey’s Anatomy who in hindsight didn’t have the best representation of gay people. Just being able to see two guys love each other who are much closer to your age range is nice to see for a change. Heartstopper was also unique because I related with so many different characters, in so many different but specific ways. It was nice to similar experiences in a show like this.

[@emmap6866]

I usually just lurk most of the time, but with this video I really gotta let you know that it made me feel a lot better. I watched heartstopper for the first time like two days ago, and while I was watching it I was so absorbed in it and loved all the characters and felt so many ✨emotions✨, but once I finished binging it I just completely crashed. I loved the show for all the reasons you've mentioned in the video, but I was just also so crushed after I finished watching it, and it took me a while to figure out why. (I haven't really slept since then cause it's just been churning in my mind.) But previously today, I finally came to the realization of what got me so down, it's basically what you were talking about at the end of the video; I'm just sad and envious that I didn't get a childhood/teenage years where I could just be myself. Not even just in a queer type of way, just in general. In that way, thinking about the show is almost painful, as weird as that is to say about such a wholesome, sweet, gorgeously heartwarming show. Cause it's like, you can never get that time back. Even if tomorrow everyone could magically be themselves, we couldn't go back in time and we'd still have the negative experiences/trauma we've already made. And I guess after I watched the show it just really hit me how nice the world could be and how supportive we could be for one another and just I guess how good life could be, and idk I think I just hadn't imagined it in such detail before. I also think, aside from how inclusive the show is, I really love the emphasis on consent, connection, and communication (also, personally, that it wasn't weirdly sexual was great)...it just sets a really great example. And I think remembering that the reason I felt a bit sad at first is something that can change has been really meaningful to me, because now I feel like this show can almost be used as a blue print to do better, and for me to become a better person and make the world kinder and more welcoming and all that jazz... Anyways, now that I've figured out a bit better why I had such a reaction, and know that I wasn't alone in that, I feel a lot better, it's really validating to know. And all this being said, I'm just so happy heartstopper exists, and I'm excited to rewatch it eventually and see what the next seasons are about...Also, I totally wanna get the books once they're back in stock. But sorry for rambling on, I just felt like getting that off my chest cause your video really resonated with me and touched on so many things I've been thinking about these last few days!! So thank you!! :) 🌈💕

[@ThatsMyUsborneBook]

I love how you've come out of watching the show and this video thinking that you have the hope that you can make things better for yourself. I think idealistic shows and books like this are exactly that: inspiration to humans that they can shape their own reality in some way and not feel like their life has an inevitable path. Our perspectives changing is the first step.

[@WatchMeDoStuff]

"You have to dive in and embrace it like a kid who's too young to have been sucked into the shame driven idea of cringe" EXACTLY

[@PopcornEmma]

ngl this is the best a KZbin ad has ever worked on me. I fully paused the video to click on the link. I had no idea notion had so many cool features and I desperately need it in my life. Thank you Rowan!

[@juali222]

I'm so happy about being able to witness an actual bi awakening in this series. I'm in my 20s and even tho my bi awakening wasn't long ago this feels super validating as I too never thought of being with the same sex because I had an attraction to the opposite one so there was no need to question anything. Love it, can't wait for season 2

[@Sophie_Cleverly]

This video explains Heartstopper's greatness so well. I'm 32 and I definitely cried wishing this show had been a thing when I was younger. I used to sneak down to watch Sugar Rush and Skins but they always had this air of chaos or tragedy, as well as feeling quite binary. Heartstopper is so wholesome and shows much more of a spectrum of identities. I feel like it definitely would have helped me understand myself as a teenager and honestly it helped me a bit now. It has given me a bit more courage to have pride in who I am.

[@Ashtree28]

This show made me bawl my eyes out. If I had something like this as a teenager, I think it might have changed my life. It was just so beautiful and joyful and lovely, I couldn’t believe it.

[@andy3701]

I really connected the the subtle scene of the aftermath of Nick and Harry's fight in Nick and Charlies' form where after Charlie confirms to Nick again that he is used to bullying and the typical hate that he would get from people like Harry, you can see in Nick's eyes being teary and saying "No, you shouldn't have to be. People shouldn't be saying stuff about you in the first place. You shouldn't have to put up with anything like that." and he then goes on to say Charlie shouldn't apologize or say the s word because of these experiences. I really connected with this because, I too was bullied and was always told to push the words down that were said from bullies and I couldn't help but tear up from this scene!

[@rei02862]

"We can see that coming out as more than just discovering your sexuality, but also figuring out all the ways that you've been pretending and performing for others" that makes way too much sense- Great analysis, Rowan! I really love both the webcomic and the show so much

[@IsraelLlerena]

Thats such a mindblowing quote. When I first came out, I didn’t completely have that “weight lifted off my shoulders”. I still felt weird. I was still so used to repressing feelings and hiding myself that coming out was just a surface level starting point of showing people who you truly are.

[@grmgt]

As a bi girl, just wanted to say that i already knew the show was going to be good when i saw the world bisexual being explicitly used, it's so good to be visible!!! Anyways, another great vid 💜

[@ouinoelle]

Same!!!

[@ouinoelle]

Yeah it feels amazing!!!!

[@owomoxcx]

42:07 I'm actually so happy you brought this up. Ever since finishing Heartstopper I've been feeling extremely empty, feeling as though I've wasted my teen years, and I wasn't exactly sure why. I'm really glad I'm not the only one feeling this way. I'm only 19 so I know I still have a lot of opportunities ahead, but there'll always be a unique fantasy aspect towards the years you spend in secondary school that never come back once you finish it, and it's heartbreaking feeling like you made nothing of it.

[@erinh9267]

.Mr Ajayi .....has a romance

[@kenadialbrecht474]

Have I watched it 20+ times because it feels like I’m living in a dream world with this kind of representation and I never want to wake up?? Yes. Am I gonna go watch it again?? Yes

[@michelcomenta]

I'm in my twenties and I've never seen an lgbtq show as good, bright and positive as Heartstopper before. Maybe Glee was the closest thing I had in my teens, but there's nothing like it.

[@inkspell21]

I'm so glad this came out on something as accessible as Netflix, especially after how sick I felt when I went to watch the new Fantastic Beasts movie, where they censored the 2 incidents of Dumbledore saying he was in love with Grindelwald and quoted in the subtitles "I really appreciated our friendship". I've never been so disgusted going to the cinema in my country in my entire life.

[@lovingiseasy-4342]

When I watched the first episode and girl in red started playing, I had to pause it cause it literally made me feel euphoric. Like starting a show, and instantly being SO familiar with culture - I’d never had that before. I really wish I saw this show when I was 13, I’m so glad queer teens have it now 😭❤️

[@bluflavouredpudding]

I love this show so much, but I have in fact felt that mourning over my own life It's interesting to see how many things I can relate to, but how many others I cannot After all, the setting is still in a first world stable country with a generally progressive attitude I'm from a very politically unstable country and if nobody's life is good, queer people have it even worse I've never actually been able to really see myself on screen and I'm afraid I'll never be, maybe I'll have to do it myself Only the future knows what it holds

[@Lisa_Flowers]

I'm in a very similar situation myself. I can only hope a positive future for both of us, if not one that has some joy, whatever that looks like.

[@lolisapiensa3134]

As an ace lesbian, I really enjoyed heartstopper, it was so cute and I feel it showed teen exploration in a very age appropriate way.