The Single Reason a Narcissist Can’t Let Go of Their Anger

[@seameology]

I love the hollow chocolate Easter bunny. The wrapping is really pretty and shiny but take the wrapper off and there's just a dark shell.

[@missycitty9478]

*empty shell.

[@Goldhearted_]

My narc ex used to get violent when he knew i was recording and at the time it was really FOR HIM because he would claim he has bad memory and so I’m like well if i record he can play it back and listen . It turned into “you’re trying to make me look bad” “you’re my enemy” “if you delete it I’ll know you love me “ .. i have so much i secretly saved and I’m so glad i did

[@geraldfriend256]

Saving correspondence= a sign of narcissistic abuse

[@seeleygirl6178]

Finally I didn’t engage. But now my heart is broken because she’s trying to turn my brother, her dad against me. This is evil, why are they so evil?

[@Querencia7779]

Because they have to win.

[@kirkturnage3426]

I can do hard things. Yesterday I told my narcissistic wife I want a divorce. Last Tuesday was the LAST time I will ever experience her rage.

[@THIRDEYEOPEN1214]

@kirkturnage3426 I know that was hard, but you just saved your LIFE! Good job! Left mine years ago, and my life literally changed OVERNIGHT. It's going to be a rough road (divorce can be very ugly; especially with a narcissist) in the beginning, but YOU are worth the battle, and you WILL WIN! May God protect you, guide you, and lead you into your new, PEACEFUL, JOYFUL LIFE! 🙏🏽💪🏾❤️ #StayStrongMyFriend #YouDidTheHardestPartAlready #YourFreedomIsThatMuchCloser #SheUnderestimatedYou #AMistakeSheWillRegret #FOREVER... 👌🏾

[@kirkturnage3426]

@ Thank you for your kind words of encouragement. 😁

[@E.K.2003]

Their anger fuels their behavior.

[@kellyannsullivan5306]

I met a narcissist he manipulated me gaslighted me bread crumbing all of it and it took 4 in a half years to a have a therapist tell me what he was doing no relationship he's now engaged and still looks at me what the hell 😢😢😢😢😢😢

[@georgestreicher252]

My next-door neighbor is an extreme narcissist. When he goes into his drama queen scenarios, I ask him if he forgot to take his medication. This usually ends the drama episode with him cursing and walking away. Lately, I don't even say hello to the sicko and act like he is not even there. This seems to be the best approach.

[@JadenHybrid]

I just made that mistake. So many ways that they get that reaction. Just don't engage in any manner.

[@calgreg2569]

When they pull your strings which turns you to anger, it’s a form of control.. they always dig at your emotions.. especially very personal ones because those emotions hit you so deeply emotionally.. there is no winning with them.. it just goes on and on and on.. best to just not get emotional and stay away..

[@seameology]

Good old handwritten journals were good enough back I the day. I had everything written by date. Took it to court.

[@katethegardener]

Walking on eggshells, editing all messages so I don't trigger the Narcissist. I was so good for a few years no contact and then they guilted me back in.

[@seeleygirl6178]

Wow. I never knew this was an actual thing. Till it happened to me. I can relate.

[@geraldfriend256]

Were you happier no contact??

[@GwenArlene8181]

My 77 year old Narcissist tells me that his anger keeps him young...good one, eh?!

[@curtissharris8914]

@@GwenArlene8181 think vampire

[@kimpage728]

To a Narcissist, nothing is worth anything unless others are watching the mask of smiles. If Noone is watching there evil anger comes back. The real insecure ugly evil self. It's who they really are. Angry, negative, self's. There ego is all fake.

[@thierrynakache]

Keep calm ! 😮

[@kevinhornbuckle]

I am going to write here my answer before listening to the one offered in this video. I want to see if they concur. Narcissists are existentially angry because they were used by a parent or care-giver. Being used interfered with their ability to bond and need to bond. They know at a fundamental level that they are screwed for life - will always be forced to pay for what was done to them.

[@spiritgurl1111]

@@kevinhornbuckle TY for your take here. I’ve never heard it put quite this way before but WoW does this resonate

[@RH-dn8ql]

My husband that's how he manipulated me out of our AZ home to sell it when I didn't want to... He weaponized silent treatment, made threats under his breath" no more kind gestures" and yelled at me to go sign those papers (electronically, he took us out of state) bc he wants to homestead.. he sold home cheap.. now a year later that couple has the house on the market bc they want to move to northern Arizona... And believe me they want to make money on it.. they're not selling it cheap.. but yeah I sold it against my will.

[@RH-dn8ql]

I have cried everyday for over a year, he pushed me past my limit.. I'm miserable, it took this situation to see what I didn't see for 34 years... All the selfishness, child like behavior, but I have No right to be angry or bitter... According to him. I couldn't even pick the new home to live in. It was all about homestead criteria which this house and land do not meet his criteria 100% , I hate this place and he knew it and didn't care... " Bc it's not about living in a pretty home," .. he's a vet with PTSD, won't take meds, bc he's smarter than all the doctors, he's smarter than everyone, everyone else are petulant children. He even went so far as to repaint inside and parts of outside of the house before selling it.. he admired his work.. I asked him to do that when we first moved in.. he told me to do it myself.. but he spent money to have it done bc it was about making money , to sell it , again he kept lowering the price... So what money did we make.. just how nice and accommodating he was to our realtor and the buyers.. so considerate .. and I'm made to feel like I asked too much..

[@DAIHSSMITH]

You will get through this. I felt like you were writing my story in many ways. Cling to God. I prayed everyday and after 22 years, the narc didn't wake up one day. I had no idea this is what I was living through. The funeral was so awful because people treated me so badly. I found out 7 months later. He died this past February, and in August, a single person told me what he was doing all of these years as I had no friends or family left. I'm just blown to smithereens. But I'm also not because God is with me every single day. And because I prayed every single day for help, not knowing what was really going on, the Lord was so good, and the narc is not here anymore, and I'm so thankful to our God. He will help you. Trust. I promise. I will pray for you. ❤

[@jrcole7273]

This is all so true and real.. Once I understood what I was dealing with staying calm and using known phrases with her made her furious. She broke out into heated arguments belittling then after she went into victim mode and blaming. Held on to anger against me , sister in law, brother and niece. If I knew what a narc was I would of realized this all I knew is I felt like ai was dealing with a toddler everytime we had to discuss an issue. Had me believing I was the issue and I was so stuck on trying to fix myself thinking it was all me. Until the day i was told what to look for and then found the phrase instead of arguing that you have the right to your perception. Ended the fight but started the war because I think she knew that I knew her game so I was just immediately discarded afterwards and yes her spear campaign game is real but it was her close family and friends so ofcourse they are going to believe well some of them the others know Truth just to afraid to deal with it. So yes set boundaries and do not engage or get engaged lol was to late from me but I’m definitely speaking out against these tactics.. thanks to classes counselor and some people here on youtube speaking the truth on this matter.. oh yes keep a journal or recordings these helped me a lot and I didn’t even know why I was keeping them but at the end gave clarity..

[@seeleygirl6178]

You pretty much just described my niece and the mess I’m in. Word for word. It’s awful. How when they can’t control you they turn others against you. Sad and pathetic. Control freaks.

[@beautypablotamarini7315]

Wasted life. Why they live at all? Parasiting crazy evil 24h.

[@micaelmcdonald9980]

This gal is awesome! Thank you so much for sharing your knowledge on this subject. Forewarned is forearmed. Thank you ma'am

[@ReynorldsAmoako]

Bravo. Rebecca it seems you. are the only narcissism instructor who teaches how to confront the narcissist and win. All other literature and instructors are about staying away from the narcissist making it looks like we are all. enablers. Cudos for your insightful instructions

[@SoniaPasricha-xw5dk]

Trouble is it is my daughter.Cant even dump her like an ex.She has extreme rage in public and she screams obscenities which is very embarrassing in public.

[@zandig666]

I no this narc she is dark and angry personified

[@DawsonDave-YZF-R6]

I can do hard things !

[@FlorenceLunsford-sk2nj]

I feel like the world is crashing down

[@JKDVIPER]

It isnt. Its hard to get through this, even when stoic, confident, it still shakes you.

[@timothyduffey4528]

It can feel like that when your going through hell from a narcissist....but I'm with you on the world crashing down it's getting wild.

[@FlorenceLunsford-sk2nj]

@timothyduffey4528 l really need Jesus l think it's hard sometimes l don't know what am going to do about my cat

[@timothyduffey4528]

@FlorenceLunsford-sk2nj Jesus is always the answer to everything, is something wrong with your cat?

[@bookzdotmedia]

Its not crashing, its the sine wave

[@jamesbishop9156]

I say; See ya! Wouldn't wanna be ya! 😂🤣👍😁💯💫

[@JuliannFlavin]

@@jamesbishop9156 ugh if it was this easy 🙄

[@jamesbishop9156]

@JuliannFlavin It ain't easy being cheezy! 😂🤣👍😁💯💫🙃♥️

[@ScottKiloby]

There’s a plethora of science that says the grandiose narcissism And it’s identification with anger stems from the Repression Hurt and Sadness during childhood along with other factors

[@Dannytyrellstudios]

You look nice...thanks for these presentations

[@Jim-d3r]

Filed for divorce after 3 months and walked away! Life is great again.

[@F1NALB0SS1]

Because I want all the nice things this world to offer right now! And yet... I get dirt...😢😅

[@bongjamesbong00420]

The narcissist can do things to make you angry

[@MichelleG-y9p]

I can do hard things

[@annmariemazzotta2495]

I need you , how to deal with a daughter-in-law I have two grandkids.

[@benverasso4836]

Thank *U*...

[@6548ww]

My narcissist wife turned both of our sons against me I have spent many years trying to reverse some of the damage it has done very little it is almost as though I never had a family to begin with it has destroyed me from the inside out

[@SoniaPasricha-xw5dk]

Sometimes I think that they are very sad people who have no selfesteem and are riddled wirh doubt &insecuriries.They think the whole world is out to cheat them so they are suspicious.But nothingCAN help unless they are willing to see this in themselves.Frankly I have given up.

[@13Hangfire]

It's my understanding that in some states, you cannot bring up the person's medical issues, such as their diagnosis of BPD/NPD in court. If true, how do you validate the person's behavior as a mental disorder?

[@esperansaloughran693]

You are describing my husband.

[@jamesbishop9156]

Lower back pain is a sign of repressing anger. It's a good tell sign of a narcissist.

[@AngelEyes-xm7el]

@@jamesbishop9156 so is being flipped on your back by a narcissist that knows karate, mad snuck up behind me. Next thing I knrw i was looking at the ceiling gasping for air. My back has never been right since. I passed out from the pain ( edited for typing error)

[@jamesbishop9156]

@AngelEyes-xm7el I'm sorry, Beautiful. Of course, there are exceptions to this general statement. 👍🙃♥️

[@homespace1268]

I have fallen off ladders and other accidents that hurt my back. Everyone has aches and pains...aches and pains is not a narcissistic trait. Stupidest statement I've ever heard.

[@jamesbishop9156]

@homespace1268 I notice when a narcissist is suppressing anger and complaining about their lower back hurting instead of showing their jealousy/anger towards me. It's happened enough to convince me.

[@RuthLaNier]

I already blocked him on FB along with a restraining order. Kind of wish I would have kept FB open for more ammunition in court. I sent my lawyer 9 pages of notes already.

[@PeterGoodman-uv2jh]

Guilt

[@Natalie-lf7hb]

They injected and handcufged me without me being aggressive. They believed the lies of a narcissist and did not check if it was correct. I feel obducted and rraumatised by an event with the police and they are not getting away with it even if i have to find all the people who had to face unnecessary policebrutality and we do the case together oe go public

[@catg5105]

What does it mean when you have trouble letting go of your anger at the narcissist?

[@seeleygirl6178]

That you’re human. God is the only way. No one has hurt me like my narc, I need Jesus to help me forgive.

[@geraldfriend256]

It means you are smart and not going back. Let go of some of it; a bit of it might be necessary to .keep. them .away.

[@thdreefie]

So, you say the worst thing you can do is engage with a narcissist. Then what do you do with all the hate, chaos and turmoil that they generate? Just bottle it up inside of yourself and hope that they cool down someday? Our narcissist never cools down or backs off. We have never found a strategy that works with our narcissistic family member.

[@StStStS]

@thdreefie Take it to a therapist where you can process it and let it go. If you fire back at the narcissist you only feed the flames and remain helpless ❤

[@cacatr4495]

They use your responses, your grief, frustration and anger, as fuel for their abuses. It isn't wisdom to continue in relationship with an abuser like that. You can never change them or alter the outcome; it's continual suffering because their abuse keeps on, so the only wise thing to do is to detach fully, to have no contact with them at all, which is called "going no contact." They refuse accountability, they refuse to change or to own up, they will not change, so the only two courses are to disconnect fully from them or to continue to suffer. The latter is not a viable option for life.

[@thdreefie]

@ …yes, everything you say is true. Our heartbreak is that ours is our son. He has abused us for years but we are trapped by our love. It is a terrible situation.

[@thdreefie]

@ I do talk with a therapist but they offer no hope of any resolution. It seems to be a problem with no solution.

[@StStStS]

@@thdreefie Yes that is the hard part: there is no way to stop the narcissist behaving the way they do, and it is good of your therapist is realistic about this. The work with the therapist is to come to terms with this and learn ways to minimise the dramas and heal from the hurt, which is hard if it is someone you cannot break contact with, eg the other parent of your children.

[@andreaslandgren1681]

When you describe yourself you dobit by ctiticizing others.

[@Natalie-lf7hb]

And when the people know what they have done Nobody will trust th again because i know this since i defended the police so many times by so many peope

[@robertnewberry7799]

Because they are immature petulent children?

[@CatholicChristian51]

Pull out your phone and start recording your Narc

[@jackaroyan2451]

This is all pollution

[@rob-robi]

Another video with a narcissistic level of over editing .