The Splatoon 3 Player Therapist: Big Run Edition

[@Alphastar716]

What would you like the Splatoon 3 therapist to talk about next? Let me know right here in the comments! 😉

[@FierceBoi325]

Talk about ranked

[@M0D3Y_Y0]

my gangnam style obsession help me pls doc

[@BlossomsofCherries]

i cant play too much, so when i fail miserably i rage… a bit too much. how exactly can i calm down easier without gaslighting myself into thinking i’m calm?

[@CountBLECK1]

Help every time I go into turf war everybody just starts squid partying, how am I supposed to have fun and get catalog levels if everyone is squid flopping in the middle

[@shark_girl]

Talk to Agent 8 about their trauma

[@jaxxenowo9720]

I THOUGHT THESE SESSIONS WERE PRIVATE

[@Agent-8]

Guys they aren’t

[@FrenchOctoAnaltaccount]

They never were, since the start.

[@-Hamza]

Ain't no way he just said cohozuna has cake with full confidence like that... are we SURE he is a licensed therapist with all the qualifications and no criminal background?? I'm not so sure anymore

[@Codename-Thefox]

Yo Hamza

[@allainosman2989]

5:44 Fine, then I call you Choco

[@ankkitha]

“You’re packing cake back there.” -Alphastar716 2024 WHAT WAS THE COHOZUNA SEGMENT?!

[@BlossomsofCherries]

the cohozuna segment was based on soms comment, thats all you need to know

[@ankkitha]

@@BlossomsofCherries i’m sorry but It was so funny like whaaaaaa-🤣🤣💀💀

[@Bria987]

I love how the therapist helped Cohozuna. He just wants love and attention

[@regalpitt]

Agreed.

[@NeoMagicStar]

Thank you for giving our King Cohozuna therapy. As a representative for the Salmonid community as both an activist and a advisor to the Trimvirate, I've seen many of our own, including our great kings, struggling because of the Salmon Runs and the strength of the Grizzco workers. We have been constantly losing our own, mainly our young children who have been stolen before they even had the chance to hatch. No wonder troops and the general public are down in the dumps. Luckily, with your help with King Cohozuna, I predict that we will see a rise in mental wellness among everyone! With one king feeling better, it's due to making everybody feel better. Thank you for your work kind sir. I believe that we shall allow you AT LEAST A MINUTE to start running during the next invasion protest 8 3

[@micheleulrich9479]

I am not a salmonid but I agree with this statement salmon run is a lose lose situation. 😢 And hey it’s at least a minute.🤷‍♀️

[@DanielP-jq4dj]

5:03 No, they made it 3x the amount, not the odds. In instances where you’d normally get zero golden scales, you’d still get zero golden scales. It’s only when you’d normally get one golden scale, where that would multiply to three, which would still be just as unlikely.

[@hello_i_m_wimothy]

mr grizz gave me vacation time during this so i wasnt there during all this thats one good thing to being the bosses favorite

[@DrChaotix21]

We can get vacations?

[@Sploon3-gv8bv]

I got vacation time scheduled for 4:30 the next morning and I just got back at midnight est

[@DanielP-jq4dj]

I honestly do think we should be able to trade in lower scales for higher scales. I don’t care if it’s 10 bronze to 1 silver, or 1,000 silver to 1 gold. Either way, it’ll still provide another way to get more valuable scales.

[@Splatmic]

The final part of this video is hilarious XD with how much Coho was bullied this Big Big Run by Joe he needs all the therapy after this.

[@Alphastar716]

Joe probably made Cohozuna feel even worse about himself 😔

[@kk1tsun3]

I kinda wished the therapist talked to players from the slat2 game, like the girl who was freaking out about the idols

[@GoofyScorpion]

WHEN YOUR TEAMMATES SQUID PARTY IN RANKED AND DIE OVER AND OVER AND OVER TRYING TO P-RANK RAINMAKER 🤬

[@TM-45.]

Who needs a therapist when grizzco roller exists?

[@BlossomsofCherries]

the cohozuna segment is so confusing until you realize it was based on soms comment. makes a lot of sense after that lol

[@som-two]

cohozuna my beloved

[@-Hamza]

and nobody else's beloved

[@BlossomsofCherries]

thats… thats just you.

[@Amethyst0407]

THE LAST ONE IM CRYING????

[@TopazTiger975]

Big big run has definitely been the most exciting big run we've had. Also the most chaotic and nightmare inducing one. Cohozuna needs more love. Amazing video as always Alpha! 🐯

[@Anymin]

Bruh, i didn't know you could make them hurt each other. Was just tryna survive.

[@hahani17]

WITH THE UNDERTALE MUSIC ONE OF US ONE OF US

[@BlossomsofCherries]

thank you for reminding me to play undertale after… a year or so

[@RegularSammykid2]

I called Cohozuna Godzilla 😂

[@jacequintana1340]

Yo same

[@kemizay8793]

I legit got 4 flyfish at the beginning of the match

i have crippling deppresion sense i can never get to x rank

[@FrenchOctoAnaltaccount]

I need help recovering from getting the Octoleet set, all the grinding made me hate gold and silver with a burning passion. Also I still don't understand how the V6 on the Grizzco Roller even work without valves or casing.

[@ibraheamabdulrahman1961]

He’s back

[@rosieproductions5406]

HE RETURNED!!!!!!

[@sayu9320]

OMG THIS IS SO FUNNY THANK YOU THERAPIST 🤣

[@dvg7093]

*Creditcard: Declined!* Me:😅 The therapist:😢 Me:😮 The therapist:*gone* Me:💀 The r@pist:😈

[@Tempest193]

Do a victim of bad kit on main weapon episode

[@chaotic_44]

what was that cohozuna segment alpha

[@-Hamza]

only god knows fr

[@BlossomsofCherries]

it was based on soms comment, thats all you need to know

[@DanielP-jq4dj]

The rng for scales is stupid. 3% chance maximum for getting a gold scale?!! Come on! That’s so unrewarding, after the effort you put in taking down a king salmonid, let alone maxing out your pay grade every couple days!

[@TheYosh-3210]

Bro is that me on the thumbnail?

[@TheYosh-3210]

Not anymore :(

[@Kgamer434]

I kid you not I read the thumbnail as “the rapist”

[@ikeokeke1759]

Hi I LOVE YOUR VIDS!!! ❤

[@AliHere.]

bbl cohozuna 😍

[@allainosman2989]

Hi

[@Bananaiss1ck]

failing side order again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again

[@RonaldMcDonald-nv4de]

What’s salmon run gan ⬇️

[@RonaldMcDonald-nv4de]

*gang