The Struggle for Autistic Adults with Employment

Hi! I'm Orion Kelly and I'm Autistic. #ActuallyAutistic #orionkelly #autism #autismsigns #whatautismfeelslike #asd
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ABOUT ORION:
Orion Kelly is an #ActuallyAutistic vlogger (KZbinr), podcaster, radio host, actor, keynote speaker and Autistic advocate based in Australia. Orion is all about helping you increase your understanding, acceptance and appreciation of Autistic people.
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[@scottdrury7404]

Diagnosed ASD two years ago. Struggled and failed at jobs for decades. Frequently unemployed or on disability. Spent a year intensely learning what it is to be autistic, and how my particular flavor manifests. Now, I’m the best nurse in the hospital I work in. And it’s because I now know how to capitalize on my autistic strengths, and make accommodations for my weaknesses due to being autistic. My life is incredible now. Always thought my brain was broken, and I was always going to suffer and be friendless. Diagnosis and education changed everything for me. My life goal now is to help others in our community attain better, more productive, and more fulfilling lives. The biggest goal I’d ever had before was just to make it through that week, or sometimes even that day. We can be AMAZING!

[@alexs5574]

❤❤❤

[@TheRuinofDarkness]

Amazing story. Thank you for sharing.

[@Lia-Miya949]

❤ congratulations It’s wonderful to know you can overcome and thrive.

[@SmackedyDoo]

I loved reading this. Thank you for sharing this very positive message!

[@KlingonPrincess]

Correlation - I don't have the social network, community involvement, etc. to lean on when job seeking.

[@raven4090]

I never did either. I'm now very grateful to God that I'm on disability. I'm still in poverty, but feel like a millionaire compared to how much I brought in only being able to work part time low wage grunt jobs - when I had one.

[@WhoThisMonkey]

I have had over 50 jobs and I'm 32. I can honestly say, I don't feel like I deserved to lose any of them. Many of them I worked so damn hard, to make up for my 'oddball personality.' Well guess what, all their businesses are organised arse backwards, I could have fixed it for them... But no one listens to me.

[@AutisticAthena]

People who buy bakeries and don't know that you don't use cold butter when you're making cookies and then fire the person who told them because they're embarrassed about buying a business they know nothing about.

[@BliffleSplick]

It boggles my mind that people don't just dive into things and learn all they can, even if it's not a passion, but just to understand the systems involved. Also: browned butter in most cookies is lovely

[@WhoThisMonkey]

NTs aren't NPCs right? Everytime I investigate an NT, it's like I'm looking at one of those shops in North Korea, as soon as you get close, you notice all the fruit are made of Styrofoam. Like there's no depth to the person at all, they go to work, they go home, they watch TV... But that can't be all they do?! Surely?! That's insane!

[@alexismcmackin]

Making them think, is the fastest way to anger them but to embarrass them, oh boy! And we’re not trying but holy cow it isn’t difficult to accidentally do.

[@AutisticAthena]

@@alexismcmackin you know what? At this point in my life, I AM going to embarrass people on purpose. That's what has happened to me for just being SMARTER than the person in charge when the person in charge is a bully with a fragile ego.

[@3RR0R210]

I've had about 40 jobs, I've been fired from most. Now that I'm in my 40s, I've finally been told what's wrong

[@keynchris7059]

High masking employed autistic here, I try to remind myself of this when im really struggling with burn out or work stress. Im doing my best with a brain that’s different from the allistic majority and I’m managing to work a job that I like most of the time. Human value absolutely does not come from one’s ability to work. I’m not shaming or looking down on those who do struggle at all. It’s just a reminder for me that I’m accomplishing more than I usually give myself credit for

[@ismailabdelirada9073]

It's the schmooze factor. And as far as I can tell, the worst people are the best schmoozers.

[@viktoriar1762]

One workplace had a meeting with me and wrote me up for not being social enough with the other employees. I was knowledgeable, responsible, and worked OT without complaint. But I wasn't "social enough." Whatever that means. I have been fortunate to be able to carve out successful positions, but it always takes me far longer to be promoted.

[@jeremykryder4880]

I am a living testament of your words 😢

[@janejones5362]

I had a job at an afterschool program, in a right-to-work state. The kids LOVED me. Some employees, did not. They were screwing up, and losing track of kids. So one day, I came to work, and was told, We dont need you anymore. I CRIED. And I told parents afterwards, Find another solution. They are losing track of kids.

[@T-Mary76]

I just got made redundant from the best job I ever had. It took me years to feel comfortable there and am dreading having to work somewhere else.

[@mm89472]

Late diagnosed ASD. I always had a job, but couldn't keep a job. Now, I'm unemployable- Thank you, Orion. ❤

[@SJHollist]

I've been there.

[@Me-hf4ii]

This is the story of my life. Now I am raising my children, and that takes up all of me. Once they are older, I will give employment another go - hopefully empowered with knowledge of my true self, no longer burdened by the feeling that I’m some sort of broken human being.

[@cammokyle]

I think its so layered. So many people I know who struggle with work always have a similar approach, as you said. Can do the job perfectly fine, better and more efficient than most at the majority of tasks, have in depth knowledge and understanding of systems etc, because the work the priority. Yet what gets flagged every single time is the social interactions. "oh you dont go on work nights" "oh you dont talk to people much" "You've been here for 8 months and I barely know you" Cus this is work? I'm not here to make friends, but in the same vein im not here to make enemies either lmao I'm just here to work, then go home and live my actual life. I agree, what on earth does being social have to do with a job where there is no socialness required for the role? Burn out too, I can usually keep my foot on the accelerator when in the zone for a good few months, but at some point it runs dry and I crash for seemingly weeks or months at a time. This doesn't fit with a strict work schedule. So many layers to this imo

[@lorelei58]

I moved from California to Kansas in 1994. Those days one had to read through the "want ads" section of a newspaper. Then send your resume, via snail mail, to the employer's address. I had an impressive resume, as well as 5 excellent "letters of recommendation" from previous employers. I received responses from almost every employer I sent my resume to, often being told I was the first applicant they called. But then came the interviews, which I totally suck at. I never made a good "first impression" because I would be concentrating more on trying to hide how petrified I was. I remember how I'd be asked a question that I knew the answer to, but I'd get stuck thinking how I should answer. There'd be awkward silence as I struggled to get my mind to piece together a cohesive response. Even though the interviewer(s) would ask a couple more questions before politely wrapping up the interview, I knew I wasn't going to hear from them again. Of course later, usually while driving home, I'd finally think of the perfect answer. I'd get so angry for not being able to think of it during the interview, which led to several minutes of mercilessly berating myself. I'm retired now and SO grateful I won't have to put myself through that experience again.

[@fleurmal7648]

My sibling (though undiagnosed) has such a problem with jobs because she can't mask, she usually can't read coworkers facial expressions, and stuggles with emotional dysregulation at work so people complain about her :( shes trying to get diagnosed now and I hope it helps people understand her better. But even though her current job has disability and inclusive efforts theres hurdles to jump to get it recognized and accomodated. I worry if it will actually help or not. As "inclusive" as companies say they are, at the end of the day they only care about results and being able to socialize.

[@TheAussieRepairGuy]

Best and longest job I ever had was fire spotting. Alone in a 100 foot tower all day.

[@alexismcmackin]

I started my last job with my coworkers employing the Japanese window sitter technique. Turns out, major labor law violations, OSHA, DOT, etc. I recorded everything and protected myself when they tried to fire me. Instead they offered a severance package and I’m still looking for an attorney to go up against a multibillion dollar corporation. Fun times as I’m still unemployed almost a year later. I just don’t want to do this world anymore at 48.

[@colletteprops8708]

I work for Kroger right now. They are great about trying to let me push limits with time and my schedule, and understanding that I a a human and not a robot.

[@sophiegolden]

You are perfectly right. I loved my jobs but suffered to be surround by stupid, nasty, lazy etc coworkers. I made an effort to be more social, meaning every morning, say hello to everyone, small talk, coffee... Conclusion, 1 hour after I was not working and ennoyed by a stong coffee... After they asked me to go to lunch with them, I said no, my doctor want me to walk... Enough...all I wanted is doing my job, have social interactions for my job, and go home. And I was not the only one I noticed. But that was not the rules.... I struggled a lot all my career...not for my different jobs, but because of nasty people and people with no education, no manners...I m not diagnosed

[@JohnConstantineRTP]

Never lost a job due o lack of ability!!

[@mariahgarske5454]

I found out I was autistic when I was like 16 . I’m 27 gonna be 28. Up until about a year ago I’ve been in denial about it like no my diagnosis was wrong but now looking back is so get it all my feelings is never fitting in the anxiety of always masking . I wish I hadn’t bucked my diagnosis and gotten helped a long time ago

[@TheKjoy85]

I have been unemployed since late 2009. I applied for jobs in my area that I could get to by bus, since I don't drive, and that didn't require a higher education. I only had 1 interview in over a year of looking for work. I didn't get that job. Then I got sick with a kidney infection. Six years ago, my family and I decided to settle for a self-diagnosis of Autism, since getting a diagnosis as an adult is so difficult in our area. Having that validated 2.5 years ago by my psychiatrist was life changing, but it doesn't make me anymore employable than before. Most of my employment limitations are sensory related or connected to other chronic health problems. I have a lawyer who is currently helping me fight Social Security for my disability benefits. I got them in 2012 and they stripped them from me in 2016 and we have been fighting to get them back ever since.

[@sarahwhittle4868]

I’m in the uk. Got a job at Brentford Nylon back in the 1980s. The manager walked into the break rooms and seeing me yelled’ not you again’ and stomped out! I am severely autistic but didn’t know it at the time. To have personal space I would deliberately miss the bus so I didn’t have to spend time with my partner cos I was full up x

[@suzanacottam924]

Well said! 👏

[@charlottejones9838]

I have never been able to keep a job because of my autism and learning disabilities. So I have bounced around from different jobs. It is a struggle for me.

[@aleisterlilywhite1109]

When I was as undiagnosed and had to work with the public, I would drink on the job to be more social. It worked for a long time until it didn’t.

[@voska7390]

I got passed over a promotion. A year later circumstances put me in the position for just shy of 2 years. I did good job at too but hated it. I was much happier doing old job. So when the manager asked if I was interested in the position I said no. 2 years of I was enough for me.

[@wendyagrey8768]

That is so right.

[@kathyroux7386]

Yes! I have failed at so many jobs! It sucks when my best isn't good enough...I finally got Social Security here in the US.

[@lornaginetteharrison7168]

I met with a new psychiatrist two weeks ago. I’ve been trying to get an autism assessment here in the UK (I’m 51) and the doctor just spent the entire appointment deriding me, saying I couldn’t blame all of my problems on an autism diagnosis, and that I was a horrible person for not being able to get a job. I walked out halfway through the appointment, because I I couldn’t take anymore of his nasty comments and I felt he had completely emotionally destroyed me. I nearly stepped out in front of a double decker bus outside the hospital, but I didn’t think it was going fast enough to do anything permanent, and I didn’t want to traumatise the bus driver. When I go it will be without involving someone else.

[@CircaBEFORE]

I’ve had like 38 jobs and none of them I stayed at more than 2 years.

[@calci2679]

I feel this

[@lizardme88]

No doubt about it! 😢😢😢😢😢

[@scotthrich]

Im in a position where i am comfortable and that suits me professionally. But my lack of wanting to climb the corporate ladder or move into positions where i am in charge of people does not appeal to me or is NOT suited to my way of functioning. This "stagnation" can also be looked down upon by employers.

[@QuiltedMadness]

I'm 46 (diagnosed last month) and have had as many jobs as I've been working about 30 jobs 😂😂. I wish i would've known sooner.

[@chrisrgutierrez]

I follow a few of these channels and although it is helpful to understand what ASD is, there is very little direction on how to succeed with the condition or how to utilize the strengths to get ahead in important areas of life.

[@orionkelly]

Almost every full length video I make has strategies to do just that.

[@Ewetubedean]

That's why I work for myself.

[@sourdface]

"Who cares" Hmm. I understand the frustration that other autistic people have when they get called out for not being social enough. I've been there. but the truth is that work is where a lot of people feel is their main place for getting their social needs met, because a lot of the time, it is. So if other people feel like you're not doing your part socially it makes them feel like they're not being emotionally considered and that they are in a hostile situation. Your feelings matter but their feelings matter too. There are better ways to resolve the conflict than just saying "fuck you"

[@KarenDUlrich]

Could you please talk about this topic a lot more! I cannot tell you how beat down and labeled a loser I have been all my life over employment. I can do the job. What I cannot do is small talk in a lunch room with strangers. I don't care what you did over the weekend and what I did is none of your business. I don't have the same interest in bargains, and new shoes, or the $200 haircut. I am certainly not going to railroad over another person for a promotion but I am going to say something when Betty Boop gets promoted when she manipulated everyone to do her job and she took credit.

[@wiglafthegrnlander4757]

Does anyone else's brain get completely jumbeled beyond recognition during interviews?

[@CircaBEFORE]

I mean this explains the last 20 years of my life. Which is why I’m destitute and homeless right now. I hate it here.

[@AriL716]

I think about quitting every day. I work at McDonald's though so even without ASD, doesn't everyone?

[@eponymoususer8923]

I understand why they care. Workplace satisfaction and morale depends on the social timbre of the office staff interactions. If we’re not participating appropriately in social relationships with coworkers, associates, or customers, productivity goes down. Other good employees quit because they don’t want to deal with us. It doesn’t look good to affiliated businesses or customers, either. It’s an inconvenient truth of autism, but it’s the truth nonetheless.

[@user95395]

Dude i had some of the best metrics in the company in its existence and was doing better marketing for my company than an entire global conglomerate. it's definitely not necessarily what you're talking about. You can also do too good and make people jealous that way.

[@Ayme1285]

If they don't like me not my problem

[@dmcsunshine1]

Yuppp

[@saradejesus8313]

The thing is, social skills do matter. My boss’ boss is autistic but it comes across as rude. Several People have left the company or left our department because of how he spoke with them. Example: a high level project manager had to warn him that she would have to take time off in the near future, for several weeks, even though the project was at a critical stage, bc her mom had terminal Cancer and as in her final weeks. So she was going to stay home with her, to care for her near the end. His response was a genuinely curious: “ok. When will that be?” Like he was asking about a dentist’s appointment. NOT GOOD. He’s very good at his job, but whether people can work with you or for you is just as important as whether you can do the job. This is why I worry constantly for my ASD daughter.

[@natanna437]

What would be the right thing to say back to that?

[@saradejesus8313]

@@natanna437if I were the boss, I would have said something like: “I’m So sorry to hear about your mother. I imagine you’re going through a very hard time. Let me know what I can do to support you, besides the time off. Speaking of your time off, since we can’t predict when It will be, which of your critical responsibilities could we start shifting to your colleagues, so that you can take the time you need, whenever the time comes..?. If we mainly put you on administrative work, that could easily be put on hold for a while, during your absence. Does that work?” (If she has her own solution, she’ll then present it to her boss). The point is to show empathy for her situation, to express it (sorry this is happening…) and to demonstrate support (willingness to offload her responsibilities). When people feel Supported, they do their best work. As the saying goes, “people don’t quit jobs, they quit bosses.”

[@Arachne-qw1vr]

Neurotypicals care how you are socially

[@Ayme1285]

I stopped caring

[@BigbyOShaunessy]

Who care about how one functions socially? Every hiring manager that’s ever conducted an interview. Every supervisor that assumes responsibility for their team. Every co-worker that desires to climb the social hierarchy and/or assert their social dominance. Productivity takes one so far. But anyone on the spectrum must have a way to navigate these obstacles before they can prove their value by demonstrating their productivity. It’s absolutely possible to accomplish, but it requires persistance and vigilance to maintain awareness of the social environment in case one person changes their opinion and exploits a vulnerability.

[@user95395]

nearly every person i've worked with has been foul, undereducated, backstabbing, and generally a displeasure to be around. They lie, cheat, steal, and make childish inappropriate remarks that adults shouldn't say in a business setting. But i'm the bad guy cuz i don't like football. You're acting like NTs are socially adept, they're not. They're better at kissing ass at the right moments, but they make giant, offensive, totally unacceptable mistakes all the time. They are better at "kissing the ring" even if it means the company falling apart, and they are better at being told they suck by their boss and still going "omg i love you boss!!! can't wait you see you at golf!!!"