Dark Comedy ARGs & Unfictional People

[@SaganHawkes]

Title sequence song is 'Dingle Dangle Morning' by Michael Hawkes! Stream it! open.spotify.com/track/360t82DHaHwvf1dc1WAWjX?si=bqSdDU5XRsy-oDCJaXQ49A Check out Kevin Y's channel! youtube.com/@whykevinwhyyy?si=54gVY9YT4uR_g0b-

[@rareblues78daddy]

Your intro's shit, bro.

[@justsomeannoyingredpanda]

After watching the video, I can confirm it was a good video. And I got a lot out of it 👍

[@GhostofJamesMadison]

Kanye pepper😂

[@Jade-dr3qe]

what's the different songs u use in the bg throughout? they're chill as hell 3:37 and 12:10

[@i8dacookies890]

"can an arg get a girlfriend?" make me absolutely HISTERICAL

[@celceusiguess]

Bro had his priorities down

[@Strawberry_Cubes]

BRO NEEDED THAT WOMAN

[@sadpotatohours4846]

all of stock roach absolutly murdered me, that moment and then the strong anime girl underwear search history, absolutely based man

[@harryplatipus4303]

I genuinely think that the stockroach Andrew Garfield bit was one of the funniest things i have even seen in a video

[@lilylohmann614]

I had to pause the video because I was crying from laughing so hard

[@nicholaspeters9919]

Or his assumption that Olive Garden is a really fancy restaurant. That’s what got me.

[@Hikarixhikarixhikari]

I did not expect to laugh so hard at that, it was insane

[@cozibeetle5644]

The initials being circled is what SENT me

[@SSS-ft9nl]

When he circled the letters i literally screamed like unironically WOOOOAAAAAAHHHH out of shcok crazy lel

[@friday13thirteen]

I interpreted the blue chair in Alan Tutorial a little differently - to me it felt like the original blue chair tutorial was filmed in the aftermath of Alan's own suicide attempt, not a family member's. He's crying and attempting to upright the chair so he can try again, but he just can't make himself do it. The chair "follows" him from location to location throughout his videos in reference to the way suicidal ideation can lurk in the back of your mind, oftentimes feeling both frightening and comforting. (Maybe this is why he paints the table in his cell blue - he's comforting himself with the thought that he still has a "way out".) This would also help explain the video where he's visibly hanging in his cell, speaking nonsense because he's half-conscious and oxygen-deprived, but obviously he once again survives the attempt. And in the end, he does find a way out without having to use the blue chair.

[@uptown-p]

the way this makes more sense and makes me way more sad

[@gatsbysgarage8389]

Christ that’s sad

[@singleplaya0]

I would also point out the phrase "you get down to the level of chair and you touch it" It reminds me of common parenting advice that if you want to interact with a child you need to squat so that your eyes are at about the same level as the childs eyes. It helps children interact with you, and not feel inferior. So it seems to me that he is well aware of the level o neglect he's subject to. Maybe he read a parenting book, and realised that his reality is much worse then he even thought. This is dark. Deeply sad.

[@penutbutterpickles]

This is such an amazing analysis of the chair, and mol this is such a sad interpretation

[@wowanimejoshua5149]

It's really sad but also makes the actual escape more hopeful because like you said, he didn't need the chair. The Final act of defiance is to break out and keep living despite the odds and everything done to him

[@guyblast10]

I had a friend in highschool who was absolutely convinced that Alantutorial was a real person. By the time the Hand Tutorial video came out, he was legitimately considering contacting authorities to get them looking for him. I hope he still thinks that way today, to be honest.

[@Twohomst]

They sound like a really loving and caring person ❤

[@invalid_420]

​@@Twohomstor a really gullible one

[@DylweedWasTaken11]

​@invalid_420 Those are not mutually exclusive things

[@Hox5241]

@@invalid_420 I would say that being gullible is common in the more caring types.

[@GangstaSparkleFairy]

I never thought anyone could be so credulous until I saw some of the stuff people believe after seeing it from a single source on the internet. It's seriously disconcerting.

[@logandarnell8946]

the garfield and petscop arg segment in stockroach was genuinely hilarious. down to him trying to edit wikipedia because he forgot where the actual page on ARGs was

[@vinegar3617]

The way that Stockroach describes Garfield as an ARG kills me. Even him bringing up Garfield yelling "ARGHH" as a reference point is icing on the cake

[@gimpscam9976]

Your profile picture is mine on my PlayStation. Never thought I’d see another genius use it as a profile pic!!! Have a great day and good luck in life!

[@Grayves_X]

It was absolutely incredible

[@onion4042]

The whole "Alan tutorial is on the spectrum, being tormented by people online" was almost immediately apparent to me just by the way he talks. Everywhere you look, youtube, tiktok, whatever, there are always lol cows. As someone who is also on the spectrum, who has trouble knowing someone's intentions, I cannot fathom how people can just get away with mentally torturing autistic people "just for entertainment". The whole thing is heartbreaking, and the way that segan approached the subject with sensitivity and understanding, especially about they-who-will-not-be-named, was great

[@ChristopherSadlowski]

Sagan's gentle approach to what many might consider "touchy subject matter" is one of my favorite things about his channel. We all deserve a little grace, a little benefit of the doubt, to be a little cringe without it turning into a zone of toxicity. Even if the "cringe" is actually sincerity there's no reason to mercilessly attack someone. As a person who has worked with a lot of kids through the years even I'm not immune to giggling at their sincerity when it goes hard. But I always apologize. Like Sagan says in this very video, sometimes the laughter is a reaction you can't control. You can control what you do after the fact, and meanness or hostility is never appropriate when someone has big emotions toward, or for, something.

[@tarotsushima3332]

Yeah, the fact that a lot of prominent lolcow infamy can be traced back to trolls and bullies constantly harassing them, using slurs, making fun of their weight, appearance or neurodivergency and some even going as far as doxxing or tracking them down. Since a lot of these lolcows end up being wrapped in controversy or do awful things, criticism for these trolls always falls into the wayside or they get brushed off as joking around/"It was just how the internet was back then." I don't think it's sympathy for the devil/ignoring harm done for saying that having encyclopaedic level knowledge on one person just because a bunch of assholes decided to bully an autistic person who had a sonic x pikachu crossover self insert comic is such a weird thing which a lot of people don't seem to acknowledge bc said autistic person has done awful things as well.

[@misseselise3864]

2011 was a very very very different time

[@onion4042]

@@misseselise3864 it's a very poor excuse to abuse the disabled for laughs

[@polocatfan]

​@@tarotsushima3332sorry but it's pretty hard to defend someone who raped their mom. (and I'm autistic too.)

[@sanityscraps]

Alan Tutorial is the saddest story about a clearly disabled character I have ever seen. The themes of intellectual disability and ableism are so blatant. The character of Alan clearly has some sort of IDD and needs specific supports. When disabled people who can't work or understand the world can no longer rely on their family or support system, tragedy follows. People like Alan irl who fall through the cracks often end up being abused, homeless, or even trafficked, so I don't fully see the last act as a metaphor. I could do a whole video myself about the disability lens one could take to Alan Tutorial.

[@captaincrazycreative]

I'd be really interested in seeing that!

[@vulfhead]

make that shit bro put urself out there homie

[@FiSH-iSH]

tell us if you do

[@mygoodfriendcosmo]

legit subbing to ur channel just in case u do make a video on alantutorial bc i’ve seen so many different interpretations of this series and all of them have been fascinating

[@Fiefietrueomnipotence]

Its been 4 months, you aren't making that video, are you?

[@amorapologist]

with his whole persona of incompetence i was genuinely not expecting stockroach to have such a beautiful voice

[@autismrizzard]

I think the AlanTutorial one hits home for me. I myself am autistic and his demeanour and condition are hard to ignore. A lot of autistic and nuerodivergent people seek validation, never quite feeling like they fit or connect to anyone, so KZbin is a big thing for gaining people who are genuinely interested in your interests

[@SquishyMain]

But even on youtube it still feels like i am still alone.

[@demetriam2408]

Love your username, very relevant

[@beanpole_brando]

Idk why but the rotating meat when it was in frame scared the shit out of me

[@Dlúith]

That image evokes some primal fear that I cannot begin to explain

[@Twohomst]

The brain just goes “NONONONONO” the moment you see it

[@ghhn4505]

Okay so it wasn't just me, I can't even clearly see it but damn it gives me the chills every time I see it

[@rainbowpils3404]

I guess y'all should never visit a kebab place then

[@minecraftveteranyoda4476]

I can’t help but fall to my knees and cry when I see a rotisserie chicken

[@eddie4988]

the thing i find so interesting with stockroach is that he is so deeply creative and since this is pre the ai art boom he makes his own lovely animations and game set ups, which feels so antithetical to the stock market, gig economy, shills he’s playing as, but still he seems like the type that would fall into the ai art trap thinking it makes him “better” which only makes this age better and makes it even more bitter sweet. if his hard times fell now who knows how his outlet of creative energy would have gone. a true gem thanks for sharing! you videos have only gotten better!

[@ErikHolten]

I think the book of Sonnets by T.S. Roach may still be available for ordering!

[@GunSho72]

I have never heard of stockroach and that “Martin Luther King New Year” took me out 😂😂

[@GunSho72]

I love stockroach 🥲

[@MAD-cn5zq]

“Some people will call this sleep walking” “I call it… an opportunity” Just gold man just gold.

[@Armored_Ariete]

opprotunity walking is what they call it in my brookrage crypto e trading real estate investing channel we also only hire schizophrenics

[@Bofrab]

One of my first and one of my favorite instances of seeing a “fake person” is Grandpa from Jerma985. It started off in Jerma’s 3rd video of Jerma’s Grandpa playing insane aquarium. Later it escalated to the MLG Grandpa videos where he gave tips to get good at shooters, but the tips were utter nonsense, Grandpa invading Jerma’s Minecraft world and builds a castle for himself in creative mode, Grandpa making a Draw my Life, where he talked about him having super hero blood, and how he died but traded his lunchables to God so he could get a couple more years alive, only to realize he’s been alive longer than the deal and starts freaking out. There was even a point where Jerma made a video that was gonna reveal that grandpa wasn’t a real person, but during the video Grandpa barges through Jerma’s closet, and tells Jerma he only told him to make that video just so he could scare him. Jerma has eventually stated that he made Grandpa because he wanted an excuse to swear in his videos, but now Grandpa has evolved into one of the many characters in the Jerma universe, still showing up occasionally, and I’m pretty sure he’s in every one of the Jerma Rumbles. (For anyone who doesn’t know it’s basically wrestling Royal Rumbles, but with 20 characters Jerma made in a wrestling video game.)

[@Hikarixhikarixhikari]

You know, I don't know why I hadn't considered those personas of Jermas to be in the same catergory of "guy I made up", but they really do fit. you are so right

[@Bofrab]

While I consider Grandpa to be the biggest one he’s made, there are other characters that could fit this category as well. The other big one being B. F. Bugelberry, someone Jerma “hired” to make more crazy characters for the Jerma universe, but at first was just told spooky stories.

[@ladybugd0ts]

jermas mind is so beautiful….

[@BlurryNova]

I was half expecting you to say your favorite fake person was Jerma lmao

[@Bofrab]

@@BlurryNova that would have been funny. Damn.

[@fionabunny9835]

long time subscriber here. you've hit a nerve i didn't know i had, sagan. i didn't realize how sick i am of the irony that entrenches the internet until you made your final points and it all clicked and hit me like a wave. as an autistic person who tends to be very effusive about my interests, i didn't really realize how hard i've had to bury my genuineness until watching these series along with this video. connecting with these characters in this order and hearing your breakdown of the common themes through them just made it all fall together so neatly. i hope one day i can create something that adds to this dialogue, i didn't know how much it meant to me until now. you said towards the end that you were concerned about the merit of this video. i'm just some internet stranger but i wanted to let you know that at least to one person somewhere this essay has spurred a genuine dialogue with myself about these themes both creatively and also as an actual autistic person who struggles with compulsory masking of my symptoms. so like, genuinely thank you for putting out the thoughtful and well written essays you do.

[@surgecentral05]

very well said; this video helped me understand different viewpoints I could have about internet stories that critique the internet. "Because the Internet" if you will.

[@sabresister]

I always knew I was a sucker for emotional piano music but I really wasn’t expecting a story called fucking “the stockroach” to make me cry lmao

[@niccy_the_niccy]

i really enjoyed the entirety of this 2 hour video that released 11 minutes ago

[@nunya___]

Those are dollar minutes.

[@TheEasyRedRider]

the rotating meat thing actually put the fear of god into me, what the hell was that

[@daalimbe]

right?? I knee-jerk flipped my screen away from my face with just visceral disgust

[@Autistic_Menace00]

rotating meat

[@Autistic_Menace00]

I hope this helps! ^ ^

[@P4INKiller]

We call it döner

[@ihearttylerthecreator4413]

same it was like a jumpscare to me😭😭

[@aeschafer1]

Ah yes, Kanye pepper. What an ingredient. Every bottle will make three good dishes, then gradually lose its potency while screaming about Jewish conspiracies in your cabinet.

[@wlf-hly]

Dammit why was this so good lmfao atleast 5 good dishes tho 😭

[@andyghkfilm2287]

I’MMA LET YOU FINISH BUT THIS IS THE SPICIEST TOAST OF ALL TIME

[@Heathenshalt]

The conspiracies are when it gets its most FIYAH 🔥

[@slightlyaboveaveragebutaverage]

based

[@Heathenshalt]

@@slightlyaboveaveragebutaverage Sagan Hawkes is secretly based white supremacy

[@i8dacookies890]

Going from Alan to Stockroach, it's pretty jarring to see so many current references, you can tell that Alan was very deliberately timeless.

[@boodesultan12]

Alan tutorial has bit funny but always felt throughout the series it gets more and more serious and unhinged But stockroach is probably the funniest and most genius way of taking advantage of "fake people genre" with actual interaction and people/fans of stockroaches causes the story to diverge and affect where the channel goes, from ARG bit to tweete and donating I can bet its all improv and without that the project and the comedy wouldn't have worked

[@YourWaywardDestiny]

2:05:00 I have been trying to tell people that cringe is not the enemy, but our inability to process it for years, I have been telling people that it is an empathy response for just as long. People tend to either not acknowledge what I'm saying, or misattribute why I'm saying it... The cringe you get at the unhealthy symptoms of becoming so attached to a body pillow, a person neglects to care for themself is the same cringe you get at a kid doing a stupid dance for attention from their older sibling. Shoving the reaction into the "I'm not allowed to feel this" zone is emotionally harmful. Making a mockery of the subject that brought up that feeling is emotionally harmful. You can't redirect the feeling and hope it fixes itself, you can't ignore the feeling and hope it never comes back. You aren't upset at the person who is socially miss-stepping, you are upset because you can see yourself making the same mistakes. You have to follow through with the cringe, or you are harming yourself and probably others, too. *Don't kill the part of you that's cringe, or the part of you that cringes, kill the part of you who is so afraid of what it is to cringe in the first place.*

[@PhoebeTheFairy56]

A lot of people don't know the actual definition of empathy so that probably was part of why it was hard to explain

[@gray7035]

Oh god, the fucking Stockroach Store announcement had me wailing. Once is awkward, twice is funny, three times is fucking hilarious

[@gentlemangamerec7025]

Alantutorial was my first dive into Unfiction. It will forever hold a place in my heart, so thank you for reviewing it.

[@charsiuwu8084]

Was there a game element to AlanTutorial?

[@andeggbreaks]

Alantutorial isn't an ARG

[@Cythereans]

As an autistic person, I take the alantutorial chair as a sign of a special interest that doesnt leave. Even as he stops making tutorials, it feels like masking your autism. A lot of autistic people, including myself will often try to insert their special interest into whatever is happening, I think this is represented by the blue. Alantutorial to me is a story all about being autistic online.

[@terribleTerrestrial]

i dont know how many people will see this but i really just needed to comment about how you talked about disabled people during the alan segment. it is so insanely nice to see someone finally acknowledge the problem of harassment and bullying and even just ironic, rude ways of watching disabled and marginalized people online. there are so many cringe accounts that majorly post fat and/or clearly autistic/disabled people. its really fucking depressing and dehumanizing. and no one defends them, it feels like alan's family just leaving him to rot. no one cares for them. i see so many people just stop doing what they love because of how horrible people are to them. so thank you for talking about it, especially with your big platform. i started tearing up finally hearing someone talk about it. you nailed the nuance and everything was perfect. thank sagan, it seriously means a LOT.

[@Shift_Salt]

Henry's Kitchen is if I watched James Sunderland try cooking to cope with his sick dying wife.

[@ladybugd0ts]

LOL

[@rhysbando]

REAL

[@jaz121]

this is so specific i love it

[@ChewieLeFawgz]

And he uses Pyramid Head's Great Blade to cut the food. Lmao

[@greenhowie]

Back when annotations were still around there were really creative effects on some of the Alantutorial videos. Guess those effects and jokes could be considered lost media now.

[@LunaWitcherArt]

We would have never thought that the annotations in KZbin videos would become something cherished and not annoying af... The fact that "Annotations" are still in the config menu of KZbin without doing absolutely nothing is a spit in the face, really

[@ImTheGuy]

@@LunaWitcherArt It still technically dose something. It removes corner pop ups and the channel logo thing at the bottom left corner of the video.

[@LunaWitcherArt]

@@ImTheGuy never noticed it with how incredibly useless it is The 'i' in the corner already disappears on its own, and the channel logo doesn't really take up that much space, unlike _the freaking video recommendations at the last 20 seconds of every video that I can't turn off to see what might still be happening behind them_ THOSE are the things that I wish I could turn off with that button, even if just for the video that I'm watching. That has been annoying me for years.

[@ImTheGuy]

@@LunaWitcherArt Yeah it's not really useful unless you want to take a fully clean screen shot of a video.

[@FiSH-iSH]

iirc there are browser extensions out there that can restore annotations

[@Harry_808]

Omg Stockroach is the funniest and most meloncholic series I've seen in a while. Thanks for sharing it with us, Sagan, and good job on the video!

[@fluorescentalien5204]

dude the composition at the end of stockroach genuinely brought me to tears. SO excited for kevins new short film!

[@zombieplush]

i remember finding stockroach in the night mind index years ago and ive always hoped someone would cover it. you have no idea how excited i am to watch this.

[@Grayves_X]

I just found him and it's genius. I'm so upset that I only just heard about it

[@soraskingdom2388]

Ok, your street cred went up EXPONENTIALLY here Sagan. Ill admit im probably on the higher end of the age range of your viewers (early 30s) But the wave of nostalgia that hit me when you brought up You Suck At Photoshop and Edaltin blindsided me. Cant wait to sink my teeth into the rest of this 2 hour vid. Great work (I can only assume) per usual. Edit: And after finishing the vid, EVEN more cred. I havent thought of alantutorial in a decade. Thank you for this vid, gonna send this to my bud who showed me alantutorial all those years ago

[@sebtyson9232]

Stockroach is quite literally the bisexual icon we need rn

[@leo-gv4td]

yea man…

[@melasnexperience]

I never really thought of it, but the parallel between Alantutorial's story & the stories of various lolcow figures (in particular the tragicomihorror of Chris-Chan) is pretty spot on. Right down to the audience getting bored & moving onto new, more active targets.

[@VultureSkins]

It’s not a “tragicomihorror” it’s just a tragedy.

[@evelelro]

I thought stockroach was just going to be a bit of a silly story with plenty of comedic elements that would have some deeper mystery to it that’d make it kinda spooky or something, and, in a way, it was. But ultimately, like you said in your video, the story was one that was just so deeply human. I laughed and cried along the way because it’s a story that’s actually really relatable for me, and watching the piano performance at the end had me sobbing. Excellent story telling, and it makes me happy to see people sharing stories in creative and unique ways. Props to the creator, and to you for your extremely good coverage.

[@Grayves_X]

It was so incredible. I don't think this series will ever leave my mind

[@Katie-gr6qq]

Henry's Kitchen didn't do much for me until the cat. For some reason his deadpan delivery and the cat ACTUALLY SITTING sent me into hysterics.

[@A_Wild_Dyzzy]

The reaction when SR checked the value of his Bitcoin was so well done it felt real. Hats off to him!

[@Grayves_X]

I didn't think he was going to check so I paused and checked myself and laughed then when I carried on watching it was amazing

[@Kain128]

The build up and reveal of "Andrew Russell Garfield" was incredible. Also, Eugene sounds like Homestar Runner with congestion.

[@Armored_Ariete]

I was dying of laughinh

[@quantumevent]

In alan tutorial- rotating meat sticks are pieces of himself he's carved off as an artist, akin to scene in The Curse where white lady patron just eats the sliced pieces of meat without asking or understanding the transgression

[@ThePhantom4516]

that shit scarred me when i was younger

[@ThePhantom4516]

that shit scarred me when i was younger

[@ienjoy7819]

that shit scarred me when i was younger

[@unduloid]

that shit rejuvenated me when i was scarred

[@AnnissXD]

that shit made me younger when i was scarred

[@verb9602]

in case you're still worried i want to reassure you this is a really good video, you articulated something a common in a lot of ARG's, something i maybe had an inkling of but hadn't fully noticed. I appreciate your empathy for the mentally handicapped people that have become "Lolcows", even if they're not saints, people on the internet have tormented them like kids poking a bug with a stick, like play things, and try to justify their bullying as justice for any bad thing the person has done in their life. It's also not surprising that the places this bullying comes from is sites like 4chan, kiwifarms, full of people who are also likely not doing well in life, and need to punch down on someone else to feel better about themselves.

[@theorosef]

the quality of the editing EXPLODES in between each video, and it's always so cool and delightful!

[@Poopoopants420]

andrew russell garfield really made me lose it lmao

[@bigmanxeo]

“Kanye pepper” 😂

[@marsverb]

I really appreciated your analysis of alantutorial and think you were very sensitive in your discussion. Alan's vulnerability and apparent neurodivergence have always been what jumped out at me about that series and it bothers me that so much analysis ignores this completely and just goes "It's about art and KZbin!" It's really refreshing seeing the series discussed through this lens.

[@Falkuzrules]

It's funny cuz I never thought of it as any kind of "metaphor", I just saw it as a really crazy interesting story... I think it's actually less fun to say "Alan represents teh artists!" and stuff.

[@Arewitheyes]

the circling of Andrew (russel) Garfield's anme with that music made me pause the video and just sit back in my chair. what a reveal!

[@undoxxbruh9804]

In stock roach, Something about Jeremy being supportive and still finding a friend in Ashley after her confession of being a lesbian is so sweet and makes me love the character of Jeremy, because that's how you see that he actually likes-loves her, He isn't angry and disgusted by the "rejection", he instead sees her now as a friend, and those Girls kissing and boys kissing videos were not only hilarious but also a way to show that he is supportive, and loves his friend but doesn't immediately know how to deal with the idea of his romantic feelings not bring corresponded, and 3ven in the moon and fisherman story he makes sure to not blame the "Moon"

[@mahasura9667]

i just want to reiterate what Sagan said about Hypnospace Outlaw, that game is fucking amazing

[@tritonis54]

Yeah, it’s the only time I cried because of a piece of fiction, it really struck something nothing ever talked to in me.

[@UglyFleabag]

i still cant get over the fact roach was so worried champ could get corona its such a sweet part of his character!

[@Wonkt]

We eatin good tonite

[@dudeguy5762]

burger king frys taste good

[@Baileylad5]

Your pfp is very good

[@Wonkt]

@@Baileylad5 thank you kindly.

[@johnny_baldosa]

We may never eat good

[@RolandEdrickSantos-jz7yp]

Let henry cook🗣🔥🔥🔥

[@moopleaf]

I saw the mention of alantutorial and screamed, then saw Henry's kitchen and screamed EVEN LOUDER. I can't thank you enough for covering some of my favorite internet projects basically ever.

[@BlurryNova]

I forgot how good Alan Tutorial is. I was a teen when it came out and I remember only viewing it as a horror project, but watching this back I can't believe I missed some of the comedy in it. Like the thing with the dollar man? That shit was hilarious.

[@BlurryNova]

Alan Resnick does an amazing job mixing genres that seem to be so contradictory to each other. Horror Comedy seems like one of the hardest genres to make good content for. Finding humor in a scary situation without removing the fear sounds like a hard skill to obtain. But Alan Tutorial did it so well. I could get a good chuckle out of Alan having a one sided conversation with a pile of dollar bills shaped like a man as well as him sitting on top of whatever tf he was sitting on in his room, talking nonsense staring down at a ritualistic setting of dollar man encircled by piss bottles while also being horrified at the conditions Alan was living through. The humorous things Alan said and the way he talked didn't pull me out of the horror. It went so well with the story.

[@eveghost]

I'm overjoyed to finally see someone cover the Stockroach. It's such a hidden gem and Kevin is so amazing in all he creates. It's about time more people took notice of what he's doing. 😊

[@M3m3T1m3]

Possibly a great series that can go under the “these people aren’t real” is the onion’s horror comedy series, Porkin Across America. The series is about Jim Hagerty going to pork restaurants across America but we see his life far apart as his wife leaves him and his niece dies from someone killing her. Though during the series, we see Jim turn into a pig as his upper lip is a swine lip, his arms and back are pig skin, and his organs had to be surgically removed and put in pig organs because his organs gave up on him. My theory is that since he was drinking pig blood, it did something that made his organs give up on him. At the end of the series, we see Jim just physically and biologically become a pig. It’s a great series and I fully recommend it, I’ll just warn that it does have small body horror and distressing things throughout the series.

[@BasketKase]

Stockroach made me cry, which is something I never thought I’d do to something like this. The intersectionality of medical sickness and queerness, and trying to find and accept yourself in more ways than one just really spoke to me. It was genuinely beautiful.

[@DiamondWorldYoutube]

When was it about queerness? I'm confused

[@BasketKase]

@@DiamondWorldKZbin Stockroach has folders/searches of both hot anime girls and boys, his crush turns out to be lesbian, etc.

[@sophiel7690]

i just wanted to say how much i appreciate your approach to the stuff you cover-i find videos that cover niche internet horror/unfiction/etc tend to just give a recap of whatever they’re discussing and go no further, but you actually go beyond that and discuss the themes and what these pieces are saying (either intentionally or unintentionally). unfiction/ARGs/internet horror is a genre that can and should be analyzed through a critical lens, and i really appreciate the thought you put into your analysis! also the ‘i asked my mom if i’m the reason her and dad divorced’ made me chortle

[@sophiel7690]

i also really appreciate the sensitivity you approach the stuff you cover with, often creators will sensationalize or even completely skip over the serious/uncomfortable parts of a narrative, but i’m glad that you discuss these things with the appropriate weight

[@filthycasual6118]

I had to take a break after the second alantutorial analysis. It was deeply respectful, so it's not that. It just hit really close to home. Love the video.

[@user_abuser_o7]

Alantutorial is such a masterpiece commentary. More parts than I'd like to admit resonate with me more than most things I've ever watched. Wait... I might be mixing that up with another one that I can't remember the title of. Edit: no this is it. The self soothing rituals and how odd they may appear is probably the story of my life. It's even more perplexing when what you're doing to make yourself feel better doesn't make sense to you, nor does the reason why you feel like you need to do it or anything in your life at all really.

[@user_abuser_o7]

I've always taken it to be a big drawn out example of somebody desperately trying to cope with life when they feel all alone by doing the only thing they know will make them feel valuable: teaching somebody something that they didn't know and finding fragments of your identity along the way in these little videos except you don't even really know why you're doing it or how you know anything about what you're trying to teach

[@gemwilliams6486]

I’ve never seen your videos before but the care you put into speaking about how neurodivergent people are treated online made me subscribe to you immediately. I have adhd and am on the spectrum and the ableism that exists online with the whole “lolcow” phenomenon is extremely disturbing to me. I have trust issues when it comes to the internet because of how common it is for people like me to have our humanity denied in favor of treating us like we exist for the sole purpose of being bullied as entertainment for others. So it’s really nice to come across a channel I’ve never seen before and immediately see compassion towards us in the first video I decide to watch. Thank you for your kindness and empathy. It really means a lot.

[@lucasoftazmily256]

Despite Alan's dire circumstances, him saying "Read 'em and weep" over two dollars is hilarious.

[@TheMadsC]

I really like the fact that in the Stockroach story, Ashley didn't just "not like him" but (from what I could gather) is actually a young lesbian teen, who's in love with another "moon" (girl). It would've been easy to just have her not be romantically interested in Jeremy, but instead she was given character and seems to very much care about him, just not the same way he felt about her. It's also cool to see gay representation in an ARG, even if not the main character. I don't feel like I've seen much (if any) of that before. So just thought I'd comment on that. Great video btw. I've been binging your most recent content this week. The Basilisk and Kitty Horrorshow videos in particular was amazing! I'd love to see more like that in the future, but I think I'm gonna enjoy whatever you come up with, regardless.

[@mentallyunstable1926]

the point about representation is so true im wracking my brain and i really cant think of any other unfiction stories i've heard about with queer characters. i also feel like jeremy is also implied to be queer since he's made animation of same sex anime couples kissing, and it's not just two women in a fetishistic way it's also two men. plus he has powerpoints of both the hottest anime men and women so i like to think that he and ashley bond over queerness

[@TheMadsC]

@@mentallyunstable1926 really good point! I haven't watched this video since I made my original comment, but I remember the points you bring up. And yeah, I'm inclined to believe that Jeremy could very well be queer, likely bisexual or maybe pan? 🤷‍♂️ And I'm glad it wasn't just me blanking on other unfiction/ARG's with queer representation, lol. Oh actually nevermind, I was about to write "I'm sure there is someone out there", but then I just now remembered, I'm pretty sure Daisy from Daisy Brown is canonically lesbian too. But yeah otherwise, I don't remember anyone. I feel like EverymanHybrid had a queer character, but I can't remember. Anyway, this comment is getting too long...

[@Blasteronefr]

Stockroach having a Eureka moment after realising that Andrew Russell Garfield is related to ARG had me rolling.

[@howchildish]

You can honestly do a 2 hour video just on Alan and his stuff. It's funny and yet so jarring and uncomfortable, but you can't stop watching.

[@Kazooples]

I’m sure I’ll have more to comment on as the video continues, but Alan knocking always made me think maybe they’ve had CPS called in them in the past for leaving him home alone when he was young, so he’s making it look like he isn’t alone. Being someone who grew up with threats from CPS(for no good reason) I understand the fear of being taken from your family.

[@eveleene3613]

That's fucked up oh my god. That makes a lot of sense

[@doctorworm420]

Stockroach mode can easily be achieved by five easy steps: 1. having ADHD (I think he's also dyslexic or dysgraphic its very common together) 2. not taking your meds because you forgot/don't wanna/ there's a worldwide shortage that has yet to fix itself for four years. 3. stimulant withdrawal psychosis 4. get non-consensually grippy socked 5. get pumped full of quetiapine. The angel sounds like medicated hypnagogic hallucinations. If you want a speedier version just eat a really strong edible wait forty minutes, unfortunately, the devil is more likely to show up there and also you won't be near anywhere as funny in your notes app. Source: we've all been there man

[@VultureSkins]

Did not expect the grippy socks to appear in this comment

[@BruceForte]

Stimulant withdrawal psychosis? I can have a psychosis if I don't keep taking them?

[@lotusdumplings7066]

​@@BruceForteYeah. Withdrawal symptoms for any drugs vary from person to person but stimulant withdrawal can cause psychosis, among other things. But it really depends on the person and dosage and such.

[@Xynlnn]

i literally just love sleeping and binging these retrospectives time to time and even rewatching some because the editing makes it worth while and it always has an interesting story

[@quincey5917]

This might be your best video yet. I don’t usually comment and I don’t have anything insightful or deep to add that people haven’t already said in the comments - but I really loved this video. Henry’s Kitchen and AlanTutorial are two series that hit very close to home for me as someone who’s neurodivergent / autistic and has struggled in the past with being a subject of mockery by others. Thanks for your sensitivity and nuance in covering the subject matter. And thank you for shedding light on less popular and underappreciated works & creators. I’m so glad I was introduced to Stockroach and Kevin’s other work.

[@SwaggyG_2102]

As someone who wants to take a dive in creating videos but has low self-esteem, I commend these people for being able to post themselves online for the whole world to see.

[@RedshirtAfficionado]

That is literally the opposite of the what the video is talking about

[@DJG_Studios]

@@RedshirtAfficionadothat’s why it’s the best comment

[@amandacartagena4721]

Make a guy up type comment, you say?

[@beastewart7]

it’s been quite a while since i rewatched alantutorial so i might be forgetting some small lines clarifying otherwise, but i always got the impression that alan accidentally locked himself out of the attic. which imo is sad in a slightly different way: the neglect of his family escalated to its logical conclusion (alan being harmed/missing) and they presumably didn’t even notice or bother to look for him :(

[@VultureSkins]

In this video, the part where it shows he’s been locked out (whether accidentally or on purpose) is followed by a clip showing that bars were installed in the window after. I’m not sure if it makes me sadder to assume they kicked him out explicitly, or that they saw the chance to get rid of him and took it :(

[@skellydoodles]

I’m so glad I took your advice to watch Stockroach pre-spoilers. It was an amazing experience, the ending genuinely brought me to tears

[@JK-gm6kk]

The music was so pretty

[@unduloid]

5:07 "Lots of dead space" I think the phrase you're looking for is dead _air._ Unless you mean we can expect necromorphs.

[@raeoverhere923]

I think dead space can apply here too; the shots of Henry are pretty weirdly framed, and there's a lot of random, empty background visible.

[@renegade-ginger]

In the furry fandom, we often have a saying that we're 'cringe but free'. I think that's a good sentiment to take away from these series and this video. Life's too short to wring your hands over what other people will think of stuff you wholeheartedly put your passion into.

[@mjjjermaine]

+1

[@ZiddersRooFurry]

Exactly.

[@nellyfrommovies]

Stockroach hit me like nothing else I’ve seen from unfiction. When he was telling the story of the fisherman, I genuinely started tearing up because even though I knew none of it was real, it was portrayed so accurately that I felt like I was seeing someone I knew and what they were going through. Rock on Stockroach. Rock on!!

[@whykevinwhyyy]

great video. lots of stockroach details that i never noticed before.

[@rollapoid]

hey wait a minute-

[@thatsguy1111]

"Babe, wake up, Sagan Hawkes uploaded a new 2-hour-long video."

[@kururu666]

6:30 LACTOSE INTOLERANT

[@sweet-nessu]

No matter if this video was a group effort or not, it’s quality is deserving of far more than 300,000 subscribers. You are such an inspiration Mr. Sagan Hawkes.

[@JB-bc2ry]

>Alantutorial mentioned Already gonna be a good one :)

[@obvioustroll8181]

You did a great job covering Alan and the interpretation of his videos IMO. Side note my ex showed me some of those videos before I knew about ARGs and it freaked me tf out. I'd forgotton about that until now.

[@melon1674]

Yay another upload!! You're genuinely my favorite channel ever :]

[@Galaxy-ji8ws]

Sagan is one of those creators who deserves so much more attendance then what he gets. I love these videos, they literally get me through work most nights. Keep it up dude!

[@yoyohan9]

I never heard about Stockroach before this video but Jeremy is so endearing??? Like his voice and personality are charming. I was so invested in him and his story. The ending where he remembers and plays the piano piece he wrote for his dad genuinely touched my heart.

[@nahtes3629]

Just popping in to say that I have been slowly watching through these videos for days now. 10/10 Enjoying the care and effort put into all of them.

[@library.collective]

as someone who also gets extreme secondhand embarrassment, i've started interpreting "kill the part that cringes" not as about "stop feeling uncomfortable about other people's behavior/interest" and more... like, stop shaming *yourself* for enjoying or having enjoyed things the internet at large deems "cringe". whether it's homestuck or furries or 2000s emo, if it's not hurting anyone, love it unapologetically. just food for thought

[@ZiddersRooFurry]

Ravens are very smart :)

[@library.collective]

@@ZiddersRooFurry bless, that's very sweet of you ^^

[@foncess]

The Alan tutorial dr. pepper can crushing video is and most likely always will be the funniest thing I've ever seen. It's so good, and it came from a horror project

[@verkku4301]

A Alan Tutorial analysis in 2024? Sagan knows how to keep it OG.

[@orangeflavoredtoothpaste7420]

I absolutely love this video. I found the ending talking aboit cringe to be really resonating. I have been into cringe stuff for years. From My Immortal to Mike and Melissa. I find myself sincerely enjoying stuff like that. There is a strange but humbling level of sincerity that comes with projects and videos people assume are made by with with no social skills or self awareness. The end results are honest to god disasters that deserve to be critiqued but that will never stop me from finding a level of actual artistry behind them. So finding out about that game and all these projects made me very happy to see satire and cringe comedy being used im more than basic and over done punching down approach. Absolutely amazing video. Been in love with your content for months. Keep up the amazing work!

[@madgarbo]

i totally forgot about edatlin - that clip you played unlocked a core memory for me lol thanks sagan keep it up :0)

[@Parzivle]

For fuckin real though that voice made me remember something I had no idea I forgot

[@Draikinator]

Also, god, this is an excellent video. I can't believe you didn't split it into multiple episodes. Extremely powerful of you

[@Ieatdirt___]

L no likes

[@justfellicitya]

Thank you so much for suggesting Stockroach. What a hilarious, strangely beautiful, and underappreciated piece of postmodern unfiction.

[@Jm-ki4su]

alan tutorial is a glimpse into madness, and it's strangely intoxicating

[@lemongrasseyelids]

stockroach is so well crafted. the attention to details is impeccable, i was constantly pausing to catch stuff.

[@Strawberry_Cubes]

My favorite revelation of the stockroach has been “Huh HES bisexual now”

[@danielwilson6446]

This might be my favorite video of yours yet. I love your typical horror-centric content, but this one really blew me away. The entire ending segment about cringe and sincerity really hit me hard, and I definitely think it needed to be said. Amazing work.

[@May-scribbles]

I’m sorry to hear about your struggles at the end of this video! I LOVE the thesis and through line of your analysis and how you genuinely handle these topics with care and love, because you love these projects! It makes the video so touching to watch, chock full of comedic and melancholy moments from you and the featured media. ❤

[@Fenris1349]

Poignant and quality video. Thanks for these recommendations, Sagan!

[@sterlinsilver]

Woah. You know, I might not even be real. There'd honestly be no way of knowing...

[@kodyrowe-manns6360]

Do you think you are real?

[@sterlinsilver]

@@kodyrowe-manns6360 do I even think?

[@ChristopherSadlowski]

Oh no...we have an existential crisis! This is not a drill! I repeat, this is not a drill! We have a Code Blue Existential Crisis! I need all hands, stat!

[@dominicharris5851]

Don't worry you're real enough to me pookie bear.

[@stardustjessie]

I was having bad expectations due to the long videos on youtube right now, and thought it'd be 2 hours of just one series, like Baselisk (I love that video). But I'm slapped with 5 series and serious analysis of real life internet culture. It amazes me just how far your content has come. I remember your first few uploads and thinking it used too many words to say not much. But now it uses so many words to talk about so much and I am here for it. I really love your content, and I regret not watching on release because of this platform giving me bad expectations on long videos.

[@AdrianWoodUK]

So glad to see Henry's Kitchen getting discussed! I've been watching that series from the start, and to this day I find that little shuffle he makes in the intro to each video strangely reassuring.

[@coldbrewcat]

one of your best videos honestly, and i'm glad to see a bunch of folks in the comments agreeing! really well made, really emotionally resonant