I was told I wasn't cut out to be a psychologist

[@Alazsel]

Being told you're not enough. And having one supervisor believing you otherwise is very self-motivating 😢😊

[@Al.531]

I wish psychology programs would embrace self-doubt as a positive trait. My program highlights the importance of 'confidence' in a way that I don't enjoy. Self-doubt should be embraced as a positive thing, as it means you are aware that you are a 'person' and a 'person' is never perfect, they have blind spots and always have areas to learn. We are forever changing. Confidence shouldn't be consistent 24/7 in everything you do, lets not be blind. Needed this video! Thank you. Psychology teaches us not to be perfect, be human.... Then the psychology studying pathway teaches us to be perfect.

[@thepsychdiaries]

I completely agree! Something about the training really reinforces perfectionism and it's difficult to let go of even after graduating.

[@Al.531]

Thank you for sharing this!@@thepsychdiaries

[@colbyboucher6391]

Reminds me of how supposedly when trying to get papers published for PhDs, people run into the issue that negative results are treated as worthless, so they're pushed into pruning data to get the results that they "want". Despite the ability to say "I don't know" being crucial to science being functional. Kinda bone-chilling from places that should be temples of I Don't Know, Actually.

[@fatimaal_hajali2615]

as year 1 masters student, thank you so much. you can easily doubt yourself in this stage especially when training with other professional psychologists. your video was a great reminder that we need more self-compassion and to figure out our own path.

[@sumbl1ss]

as a client myself, as i am only researching schooling right now, i've stopped seeing one therapist due to vague and rash words like "so, you're toxic together" ah, not quite. he actually had narcissistic traits, and as i was 30 years younger than the therapist, i already knew he had this, this input seemed useless and judgey, and i didnt feel heard, and it felt like she didnt care enough to consider an actual answer, or provide support. it was just 'break up' . i could have done that if i wanted, but i didnt, i wanted answers and advice. generational thing? maybe. ive had very supportive counsellors, they were great.

[@amyhuang7458]

I am now studying at the same university doing masters in psychology … feeling stressed and full of self doubts… thanks for sharing! You almost drive me to tears… thanks !

[@bathth3ory]

I'm contemplating entering the industry and plan to call my chosen university to discuss the degree, and these videos help. From just one viewer, thank you.

[@lovelillysingh1230]

I’m often told that I’m too emotional and sensitive to be a psychologist. As a third year UG student, I feel strongly for this career pathway, but this comment always makes me wonder if I’d become a good psychologist and whether this pathway will be sustainable for me. You said some things in this video that helped me answer some of my own self doubts! Thank you ❤

[@sanguivora7593]

I mean it'd be kind of hard to empathise and relate to your clients if you weren't emotional and sensitive right? Do they think a robot would do a good job haha? You're fine, people want someone who they feel understands and listens, it's actually when they feel that coldness and dismissive attitude from psychologists that puts them off I find. Keep going, the industry needs more people like you, and your future clients are waiting for your help :)

[@joelwilliams3115]

My self doubt, among other things, stopped me from taking the step to start studying psychology until this year at age 29. It sucks your first supervisor quashed your bravery like that, it seems like it would have been a better learning experience for you to confront that client directly. Your warm style definitely comes across in your videos, it’s a great thing about you. And who is leaving you hate comments!? I need names 😠😬

[@marjorie4381]

wow this is the comment i was waiting for, i feel stuck since 2020. i finished my engineer career but i've always wanted to study psychology, now at age 27 i keep wonder if i should start:((

[@Mn_-mu9vz]

@@marjorie4381 go for ittt its never too late to pursue what you want , follow your heart and you wont go wrong ♥️

[@aps-pictures9335]

Age and life experience is definitely necessary for this role, so you’re better placed now than then to do the role.

[@joelwilliams3115]

@@marjorie4381 you should start for sure if you want to do it. As the comment below me says, life experience is only a bonus in this job. Also, the average age of psychologists in Australia is 44, so you could study for 10 years and still be considered a young psychologist.

[@joelwilliams3115]

@@aps-pictures9335 yes, I feel I’m in the right place at the right time tbh

[@francenikkomasbad3314]

While we were doing our undergrad internship, my supervisor told me that I was a "liar", "gossiper", and just downright shitty haha! There's a long story behind that. To cut it short, I was working on my journal and I was honestly expressing my experiences and what I thought about them. But, when she read my journal, she was not ready of some of the comments that I had written down. So, she went into full angry mode, demanded that I revise my journal, and only highlight the positive experiences. I had no choice but to do it and I really doubted myself after that. Eventually, I bounced back because I know I don't have to take it too personally, especially when it comes from an individual whom I don't want to be in the future.

[@analuca2643]

Thanks for this video Ro. I’m in my honours year, on path to become a psychologist. I’ve been my biggest enemy so far. But I’m slowly changing that. Nothing will stop me. Youre videos have been such a comfort to me. Keep doing what u do, you’re strong. ❤️❤️

[@theooone]

Thanks! I was just "fired" by my client yesterday with PD traits, but thankfully my current supervisor backed me up. Wayy different in my first placement. Now I look back and I'm like, hmm, she was not for me. But the self-doubt was real for a solid couple of months. My supervisor after that healed the wound considerably. I have learnt to protect myself better then, which helped me out a great deal with my client yesterday - it was our last session and we referred her on.

[@jul9558]

I am writing this comment with the help of a translator. I am grateful to you for your sincerity and determination to share your experience with us. Your videos inspire me to keep going. I am currently studying to become a psychologist and sometimes I worry about whether I will eventually become a good specialist who can help people well. This video has a certain calming effect for me. I will continue to study hard 🙂

[@cr0ngg]

Thank you Ro, as a 1st year Masters student from an ABC background, your perspectives and insecurities have really resonated with my own. I appreciate your encouragement!

[@chloewasabi1921]

exactly what I need. thank you Ro for your wonderful encouragement💟 feels like a friend sitting with me and talking precious advice to me

[@mehrijabrailin]

Hi ro, you are one of two female therapists that I absolutely admire, you have great personality and I can tell you are a very intelligent person I think being soft and nice and considerate is essential for your profession cuz that's what hurt people need the most, I love your videos and I also look up to you as a senior, I'm a psyche student from Iran Please make more of these video's about your challenges as a psychologist Love you ❤

[@irisberdine]

Thank you so much for sharing this story! Currently, I'm in my post-master study for Clinical (neuro)psychology in the Netherlands (the system here is different then yours, I've done a Bsc and Msc and now a post-master education) and I'm dependent on my supervisors for my assessments and reviews. Every day when I go to work I think I should be the psychologist they want me to be, but that's not who I am which makes me very uncomfortable and undermine my growth, on personal and professional level. Your story makes me realise that every psychologist has his own way of doing things and why we do things. Sometimes I feel like an 'imposter', even though we studies for years. Anyway, thank you so much! This allows me to put everything into perspective a little better

[@thepsychdiaries]

Thank you for sharing yours! I'm so happy it resonated. Hang in there things do get easier and your unique skillset is so valuable!!

[@jaybaci]

please continue your videos. your a blessing for psych's

[@eyebutterfly]

I really needed to hear this….I’m doing my 5+1 internship and my supervisor (who’s onsite) is very perfectionistic so I feel like there’s so much pressure to do things exactly like her and never trip up. I’ve learnt so much from her she’s given me so much but because I’m already so self-critical and doubt I’m good enough as a psychologist it can be really painful to deal with her. Sometimes I think there is something missing in me that I’m not intelligent enough because it’s hard to keep up with what she expects. To give context I work in community mental health so we see some of the most severe cases- the very pointy end of diagnoses. So sometimes I feel a bit lost on what to say to patients as they’re not always self-motivated. I only just started to see real life clients (my masters placement was purely simulated practising with other students) and it’s been great but there are times when I feel I could have done something better. So when you said that your supervisor would make reflections about how he could have done something better it really made me feel reassured. I’m hoping things will get easier and I can build more confidence with time. Thanks Ro!❤

[@thepsychdiaries]

All part of the process of learning and it's great to be so self reflective and no matter how experienced we get I think it's amazing to still keep reflecting!

[@eyebutterfly]

@@thepsychdiaries yes self-reflection is so important, thank you dear ❤️❤️❤️

[@elliebellie561]

Really important video, thank you Ro for everything you do! I’m Studying psychology and am very early on, but you’re definitely an amazing role model. Keep doing what you do

[@Laylow_2024]

I feel you in this video 😭I’m 18 and I’ve been told being a psychologist is pathetic and useless and that I could never become one by my own biology teacher every week it’s so demeaning but I’ve learnt to ignore what others say and to pursue what my heart wants and people like you inspire me to keep pushing to be an amazing psychologist one day lots of love roe continue being inspirational 💛

[@mattayoubi9829]

I couldn’t think of anything more meaningful, productive or useful. Your biology teacher is foolish. Best of luck.

[@thepsychdiaries]

Argh I'm so frustrated at that teacher but so happy to hear you're discounting it and pursuing psychology. You've got this! ♥️

[@FoursWithin]

I can't think of anything more pathetic than someone assuming themselves the authority on another person's path .

[@Alazsel]

Thanks! That self reflection is really good.

[@nami6382]

this video made me tear up because as a ug psychology student, i have self-doubt at times and i'm scared of making a wrong decision since i'll invest lots of time and money for this career. but what's important is that i'm really interested in this job and wanting to be a good psychologist who can support improving lives of her clients. it'll take time but i believe that i'll be there someday:) i can feel this way thanks to you Ro🤍 you really light up the important place of my heart, thank you so much😌

[@thepsychdiaries]

Oh this makes my heart feel so full ♥️

[@liv9463]

Needed this today, not in a Masters program yet but currently doing Honours and experiencing thoughts of inadequacy and self-doubt, so your words could not have come at a better time !

[@Sheik2791]

I really enjoy your content. I'm training to be a Psychologist currently and find your insight really interesting and helpful, thank you! ❤

[@wv2050]

Thank you for sharing your experience, your thoughts, and being so encouraging. I really appreciate it and have learned a lot from your content. Please keep it up. ❤

[@kirraham2742]

Beautiful words! Thank you for this!

[@eynjel2]

Thankyou! I really need to hear this!🥺

[@Jenny2.0]

You're such an inspiration Ro! ❤ Sending lots of love! Thank you for this video ☺️

[@Hiiiiiiii1234]

Thanks for the video. It’s really comforting. I dun usually leave comments but this video really touched me🥺

[@LorePetter]

Thanks. I needed to hear this.

[@deadendrite]

Thanks for this video. It's awesome that you are so inspiring to others. You seem like a wonderful psychologist and you will make a great supervisor as well.

[@liammoloney7097]

This is elite - thanks for sharing!

[@amaryllisartstudio]

Hi, I really value your honestly in this concept thank you!!!!!

[@sanguivora7593]

I know in psychology we talk about unconditional positive regard and all that lol, but uh....let's be real man some people, for whatever reason - their upbringing, being hurt in the past, their own insecurity, not having coffee that morning - are jerks, or really act like one. I think empathic, sensitive people should really allow themselves to dismiss people's completely unwarranted or cruel judgments. A good saying is something like "if you wouldn't take their advice, why take their criticism?" Another thing my own psychologist said to me once is "it's not what other people think of you, it's what YOU think of you that matters" -- I think it's kinda sucky that your supervisor said that in that way, I think it broke trust that she gave you a choice and in the end it actually wasn't a choice, but anywho - you are a great therapist, a lovely person, very capable and intelligent and diligent. I don't think you had anything to worry about, you were a student for goodness sake! And as you said, people want different things from therapists - some people want someone who will call them on their sh*t, others want someone warm and comforting. People have different needs at different points in their journey. It's actually essential for there to be many kinds of therapists from many walks of life and personality types to cater to such diverse clientele. If people want to do it, want to do a good job, and want to help people, there is a place for that person in psychology imo. Much love Ro

[@thepsychdiaries]

Ah what your psych said needs to be my new life motto ☺️ thank you so much for your support!

[@miracudrag]

Great video!

[@noaomime]

Thank you ❤️

[@SunShine-qk4rb]

Great video

[@cairosilver2932]

They had you work with a narcissistic person in your early training? That's like learning to box and being put in the ring with Mike Tyson. And your supervisor doesn't get the problem with a narcissist is that they don't have the emotional maturity to face being wrong, not even a small bit? But they say you have to confront the person who is a narcissist, as if that will work any better than trying to confront a person who is blind enough that they start seeing? And invalidated your choice...ok, this is just my opinion but that's some supervision red flags. That'd really hit in a place of vulnerability (or I think that a student can be emotionally vulnerable to a supervisor in that they take their words to heart). That would have been a really hard impact to deal with and get through. The later supervisor who modeled being mortal and not perfect at everything, it's good you got that support.

[@thepsychdiaries]

Honestly this was so validating! I never thought about how it was quite a tough case for a trainee though to be fair no one was really aware at intake. I have recently heard this supervisor has complaints from other supervisees and they're no longer supervising in the uni (which I'm very glad about)!

[@cairosilver2932]

@@thepsychdiariesI think intake would have a hard time because a narcissistic person has really fashioned their own world and it can be really convincing before evidence is examined. But I'd expect an experienced supervisor to know that already and be on the lookout. I'm glad things have changed with that supervisor, we need more talent like yourself out there and IMO they were getting in the way of that.

[@减肥舞]

❤❤❤

[@aps-pictures9335]

I mean… I don’t disagree with your supervisor. Have you read a lot on cognitive dissonance? Practice not to attach your self-worth to ideas you hold or that strangers hold of you, comments disagreeing with you shouldn’t be taken as personal attacks, for example. Criticism is just feedback with a different name, and without feedback we never grow.

[@kinshastudies6961]

She didn’t say she disagreed with her supervisor. She highlighted the different styles of psychology and how approaches can be different. Cognitive dissonance is when your actions don’t meet your beliefs, how is that relevant here? And she explained that she did initially take it more personally but she grew from the experience… ❤

[@aps-pictures9335]

@@kinshastudies6961 I didn’t say she disagreed with her supervisor, I said I didn’t. This is why it really DOES matter that you can read/listen to the exact words and way someone says something. It can entirely change your understanding. Dialectical therapy is a good resource to add to the toolkit. That also isn’t the definition of cognitive dissonance, I think you’re thinking of the word hypocrisy? Which isn’t at all the same. Cognitive dissonance is when two thoughts, usually one held emotionally, clash and cause mental distress - like reading comments and not viewing them analytically. Analytically is the skill one needs to examine words and evidence closely, so we’ve come full circle. Ideally, you want a therapist who does both. A life coach can be there for the support and hand hold, although this works with a minority of clients, most need a ‘clash’ even if it is gentle. I say most, because clearly she has found a subset niche where she can work in a supportive way with minimal use of confrontation. For teenage to adult populations, therapy should feel challenging or it often isn’t working (speaking in majority terms). Which is what potentially her therapist was getting at - being liked isn’t really the point of the job. Lastly, she did say she grew from the experience, but she also said she struggled to receive constructive feedback without feelings of withdrawal/hurt. This isn’t said to be mean, it’s just parsing what is said for the meaning underneath and presenting it bluntly. Offence only comes from choosing to take it personally.

[@cairosilver2932]

Some people who give criticism can't stand receiving any themselves. Consider the source. And yes, they never grow - criticism from them wont really lead to growth.