Can You Speedrun Cookie Clicker without Clicking the Cookie?

[@EazySpeezy]

I should've known that santa was the answer

[@johanvink2337]

you should try this method and submit it to the proper leaderboard holiday neverclick

[@bensoncheung2801]

🎅

[@SuperM789]

L

[@o76923]

I'm surprised this comment isn't pinned.

[@bensoncheung2801]

222nd 👍

[@iPxL4RRY]

imagine accidentally clicking on the cookie when hitting the golden cookie

[@bowkenpachi7759]

RIP Bozo

[@thespiffingbrit]

My hands were shaking everytime I clicked the reindeers and the golden cookie! Oh god its stressful

[@Riotouscake22]

sounds great

[@oTurkish13x]

@@thespiffingbrit Mom's spaghetti

[@dirtycasual3094]

No 😂 it's literally me (if I played this specific game) 😭

[@thespiffingbrit]

*Welcome to cookie clicker without the clicker part... oh god what have I done.*

[@Gust3883]

it's simple, you have done history.

[@Wastelandman-xk2pq]

This is beautiful

[@KLAO_]

I accept all cookies.

[@abandoned_channel41515]

You could say it is cookie clickn't

[@Liliththelizard]

You pick up grandmas... *google, remind me to hide my grandma*

[@Jaysthudandblunder]

If you actually break it down we have just watched a man NOT playing a game that is NOT really a game and no doubt enjoyed it. Spiff is a blinking genius guv'nor!

[@Kenionatus]

I would actually say that idle games are the ultimate evolution of games. They strip away most of the set dressing and lay bare the numbers go up objective that forms the core grindy games.

[@Jaysthudandblunder]

@@Kenionatus Fair point, I suppose if all that matters is the core without the window dressing we could argue that the ultimate evolution of books is the synopsis. I suspect that there has to be an element of artistry to the games and, as Total Biscuit would have said a failure state. Though as with all sandbox games you can create your own failure state.

[@if7723]

Hey, you may say its not a game but its easily one of my favorite things to keep running on my work computer to switch over too when a customer begins their 10 minute attempt to convince me that they shouldn't have to pay for things they buy.

[@plasmaoctopus1728]

Nothing to beat up, or shoot, or just win against in general, not real game /s

[@Cyrrex91]

@@Kenionatus reminds me of "Open World Game: the Open World Game". The basics are there, quests, story, leveling. just without any schnick schnack.

[@ShagaPhilalitheia]

Omg, the grandmas. Not gonna lie, I was waiting for the "Oh beans" moment when you missed the first reindeer or accidentally clicked a cookie.

[@thespiffingbrit]

It almost happened!

[@futureemp3084]

@@thespiffingbrit that one golden cookie where you clicked it over the regular cookie... the suspense.

[@Scnottaken]

When that golden cookie spawned on the cookie I nearly had a panic attack

[@everynametaken]

@@thespiffingbrit How are you a new member... of your own channel?

[@thespiffingbrit]

@@everynametaken so I can gift memberships to my own channel :)

[@StormflameMW]

"without clicking" - Is this really Spiff?! Over 90% of Spiffs exploits rely on him clicking faster than the game can handle. This must be an impostor!

[@pixelartkid7965]

The game relies on clicking, you can't overclick, so might as well underclick

[@Clumrat]

Amogus

[@unavailableun]

he's already tried that, cookie clicker has defenses against that

[@bcav712]

Among us Fortnite crossover

[@musicwombat74]

"The truth is not in the click. The truth is in knowing when to click and when not to click." Dalai Lama

[@PhilChilled]

We need those cookies for that perfectly balanced tea!!

[@MrDazzlerdarren]

You have biscuits with tea not cookies!!!

[@anoobis117]

anything can be a biscuit if you're baked enough

[@StrokeMahEgo]

Spiff needs a tea clicker mod for this game

[@kelduarjudgester9083]

@@MrDazzlerdarren biscuits are English cookies, or cookies are American biscuits, either way is fine

[@youtubewanderer3347]

@@kelduarjudgester9083 that's the joke

[@hxmdall646]

*insert narrator voice* And a rivalry has been born between EazySpeezy and The Spiffing Brit

[@thespiffingbrit]

One is incredibly talented and a skilled gamer the other drinks copious amounts of tea and refuses to play games normally

[@nitroglycerin_3455]

@@thespiffingbrit Is there ever such a thing as "too much" tea though?

[@mdg456]

@@nitroglycerin_3455 no

[@livedandletdie]

@@nitroglycerin_3455 there is such a thing as too much tea... too much tea dumped into the sea by those pesky Americans.

[@go-away-5555]

@@thespiffingbrit We need a sitcom where you live together and have a whacky neighbor

[@Cypherthegreatest]

I wasted too much time on this game, if I only knew!!! Thank you for blessing us yet again Spiff

[@EEEEEEEE]

Who haven't? Also what kind of milk do you have?

[@tyruskarmesin5418]

@@EEEEEEEE I know nothing about cookie clicker, and that is a very concerning question.

[@BebbaDubbs]

@@tyruskarmesin5418 join us. A: cosmic

[@bensoncheung2801]

321 👍

[@kf10147]

Can I recommend Alt Shift X's video on it?

[@lucaslennan3356]

7:53 the momentary terror I felt was unmatched.

[@marshmallowman6663]

Now combine that with the "Hardcore" achievement, which requires you to bake a billion cookies without buying any upgrades

[@verttion5104]

Oh deer god..

[@zuccgivethsucc646]

@@verttion5104 the deer god looks at you before going back to grazing in the meadow

[@anthonyxwrld]

@@zuccgivethsucc646 you slowly back away thinking the deer god has spared you however it shoots you a menacing glare as if to warn you not to leave

[@exceptionallyriso]

@@anthonyxwrld you stare back at the glare, filled with fright. Your legs are trembling. You hear twigs breaking in the distance, as if a giant forest mammal was walking on them

[@blando1421]

@@exceptionallyriso from behind a gargantuin tree a great bulk ambles. layers of thick inky fur draped its corpulant body, the behemoth monster stears down the now wimpering deer god.

[@ComicalRealm]

"I remember back in high school, everyone in my class would always have cookie clicker on in the background when at the library computers. Little did we know it was actually a cosmic horror story about the evils of hypercapitalism. " - Cookie Monster

[@heybobhen1621]

Mmm. You should play Universal Paperclips - a minimalist clicker game about a mixture of said hypercapitalism and the dangers of unrestrained AI.

[@truegreen7595]

@@heybobhen1621 apparently the mobile version isn't doing so hot

[@TehButterflyEffect]

I had it running on my laptop at work for a few years. Was close to getting the final building and then they blocked the game on the network.

[@MeisterKleisterHeisstEr]

This is like one of those "Can You Beat Elden Ring Without Attacking?" videos but with Spiffing Brit's charm, soothing voice, and great editing. 👀

[@NWolfsson]

I'm imagining a copypasta of LetMeSoloHer, but with a .jpeg of Spiff's avatar on LMSH's helm and a grandma's sprite on Malenia.

[@leonardsalt]

"It's not quite Dream level of luck, I could have jumped into cheat engine" daaaamn, shots fired my dude

[@argentpuck]

You can literally open the cheat menu in-game, no mods or cheats necessary.

[@LycanFerret]

@@argentpuck It's the debug menu. You can gift yourself as many cookies as possible.

[@georgios9697]

@@LycanFerret I once broke cookie clicker by autoclicking the x1000 CpS debug option. Everything just said "NaN", I was in a quantum state of having no cookies and ALL the cookies, so I couldn't buy anything lol.

[@LycanFerret]

@@georgios9697 NaN cookies. That brought back memories.... Screw the integer limit, WE NEED UNLIMITED COOKIES!

[@official-obama]

@@georgios9697 a quantum state of the computer going insane because it has no idea what to do

[@OlaftheGreat]

I named my first strange rocket launcher in TF2 "Cookie Clicker". It has a gingerbread skin and the description reads "Just like Grandma used to make them." And unintentionally, in the spirit of this Christmas run, I wrapped it in Christmas lights.

[@MichaelJones-wj4mo]

I had a vision: This Santa exploit breaks the playing field so much, that everyone agrees it can only be done on Christmas Day, and each December 25th the KZbin algorithm is overwhelmed by Santa cookie clicker

[@tangeld8359]

"No one really knows how you can grow cookies from plants" That's right, as wonderful as their tea is, the British unfortunately felt the need to balance the scales and created meat cookies for the rest of the world.

[@bensoncheung2801]

Pfp sauce?

[@elifia]

​@@bensoncheung2801 their pfp is "Slime Rancher - Tangle Slime Humanizated" by mariavLuna

[@bensoncheung2801]

@@elifia Thank you.

[@MrJkenney485]

Spif, you know you kill it every time. But I really have to give it to the editor. Who else could make a nearly 13 minute video about not clicking on cookie clicker, that I actually find entertaining?

[@NotTheLastSoL]

Congrats on placing 12th on the holiday true neverclick cookie clicker leaderboards! I always knew you had it in ya Spiff.

[@Raf99]

I'm glad more people realize it xd

[@ThatMahn]

Speedrunners use level exploits in some runs anyway, so this is a legit run imo. Goodjob, Spiff! You maverick speed-demon, you.

[@verdatum]

Heh, except it's the wrong category. The record is actually sub-22minutes set last December ;)

[@whocares2277]

@@verdatum Resetting for a faster reindeer at the start would have been an obvious improvement, doesn't even cost that much more playtime because you just add resets.

[@thatguyintherain3168]

I'm convinced that Spiff could exploit himself into ruling the world. As long as my tea rations dont get cut, I welcome our future British Overlord.

[@gnomeking8036]

im convinced that these balls cant fit in your jaws.

[@jolanpiep]

As a Cookie Clicker fanatic, I can see a few optimizations 5mins in. For one, the Cookie Monster addon will help you optimize which things to buy and when GCs and Reindeers can spawns. You'll also want to time your GCs with Reindeers sometimes, as a CPS buff can increase your benefit from other GCs or Reindeers. Also there is an achievement you can get for free by clicking the icon, and more achievements means a higher multiplier. Ive spent too much time on this...

[@deamon6681]

> and more achievements means a higher multiplier Isn't that only true once you have kittens?

[@duncanp1987]

E

[@lazulenoc6863]

Considering the British were the only ones to keep a captain's cabin on a sloop, the statement about winning in a relaxed manner really is true.

[@spartagames5808]

this is the perfect video to watch on my birthday, thanks for making it great Spiff! cheers!

[@modernmusicofthedarkages296]

I love how he’s commentating the whole speed run as if it were a serious sports match 😂

[@theeffingralyks5722]

my two favorite cookie clicker speedrun categories (yes these are both real on the speedrun website): "just plain lucky" someone was trying to do a completely different speedrun and got the "just plain lucky" achievement in 3 and a half minutes, so he decided to submit it as a new category. it has three submissions now and neither of the other two are even close to his "IRL cookie bakeing" yes, really, you have to make 12/100 cookies (depending on the subcategory) as fast as you can. they cant be burned or undercooked, but actually somewhat competently made, and no electronic mixers or a convection oven is allowed

[@xXGraylyResurectedXx]

I’ve never before considered that you were harvesting the Reindeer but in hindsight it seems pretty obvious. The layers to this realm of cookie madness are fathomless.

[@dracostar6323]

*sips on freshly brewed Yorkshire Gold tea* Ah yes. Another perfectly balanced video done in the perfect British manner. Simply perfect.

[@J-Dog500]

If Spiff catches wiff of someone being better than him. He will exploit his way to the top.

[@gnomeking8036]

how about you get a whiff of this musky ass pair of nuts

[@jjpowerman]

How much u want to bet that the second that ezspeezy see's this he's gona grind it out, just for spiff to somehow cheese it more to beat him again

[@Jig_up]

Good to know corgis are professional exploiters, the short legs must just exploit the physics engine somehow 0:51

[@XlSlothXl]

nobody tell him the 41 minute was the no golden cookie run, the golden cookie run is 14min 05 seconds

[@Maitlandfrog]

Where did you get 41 min from? And it was the golden cookie run.

[@XlSlothXl]

@@Maitlandfrog website of speedruns

[@Maitlandfrog]

@@XlSlothXl your comment implied it was mentioned in the video which it wasn't. There were only two times mentioned and that was eazyspeezy's and spiff's.

[@XlSlothXl]

@@Maitlandfrog you right, i meant 49 minutes* lol

[@millermichael]

Hey spiff, heads up, Some of the cookie clicker game builds allows you to autoclick the golden cookies, therefore breaking the game and sticking the golden cookie to your cursor indefinitely.

[@thomasdekker9976]

Ah yes, the cookie mine, the place where you get lung disease from caster sugar.

[@davis3840]

I am looking forward to an easy speezy spiffing brit collab

[@duncanchin]

We now need a speedrun with just clicking

[@youngdoop09]

Thqt would be very hard

[@rainbowgamer5273]

he spends so much time on us we should all thank him.

[@TheLongDon]

Ew

[@ES-ex3fc]

And the next Cookie Clicker Speedrun will be: The "Just plain lucky" achievement!

[@gnomeking8036]

just plain nuts in your jaws, simple.

[@the_luckiest_charm]

What's that?

[@orange_ssoda]

@@the_luckiest_charm every second you play cookie clicker is a chance to get the “just plain lucky” achievement which is 1 in 500,000 every second

[@BufoToxin-i3p]

The greatest exploit of all time, watching the spiffernator while drinking coffee. There's nothing he can do about it! :D

[@ncc1709]

you can easily do this faster... grab all the achievements while waiting to boost milk early.. like clicking the banner 50 times clicking the tiny cookie finding the ! in the achievement section, near the bottom dunking the cookie... can all be done while waiting for that first reindeer renaming to Orteil to get the achievement, then back to anything and dunk the cookie in the milk!

[@lunarazure9969]

Ironically, rolling back time and playing on a more efficient version of a game is very much a classic speedrunner move. Tons of speedrunners play on v1.0 of games because the speedrun strats or bugs they were using got patched out in later patches.

[@blunderingfool]

Or in this case, set the month to december to enable the christmas season.

[@niklasschortmann7323]

My grandma got very jealous whan i showed her your video. Please do one about exploiting Valheim. Its a very good game for building your one medieval empire.

[@Eranam]

Yessss! I was just getting bored. THANK YOU !

[@dragonboyjgh]

Imagine being this speedrunner guy. The immediate facepalm as Spiff says "well first we go into Christmas mode where you get extra goodies" and he realizes he, nay the entire community, has missed something so obvious, then watches a total casual with a bad start and no plan smash the record by 20 minutes.

[@dragonboyjgh]

>"today youtube I'm going to try breaking the world sprint record. I begin by tying my shoes INDIVIDUALLY rather than to each other. See, as it turns out it's much easier to walk like that." >Usain Bolt, watching from his smart phone, astrally projects out of self-directed rage then begins relacing his shoes.

[@Marc_s181]

Him: talks about odds and probability Also him: puts a picture with chemistry into the video

[@averagefearoftheocean3005]

I love how the stock image watermarks are added for comedic effect

[@PantsOHara]

This is so bizarre. I just started playing this a week ago. Excited to play this Perfectly Balanced™ version of the game.

[@PlayerZeroStart]

For anyone wondering, the normal True Neverclick category bans the use of Holiday mode, but there is a separate category in the Category Extensions for using Holiday Mode. If Spiff were to submit his time to that board, he'd be in 14th place out of 19.

[@davidsarton976]

I was wondering if you'd ever do Cookie Clicker again. So... happy.

[@TheSykoRC]

Let’s hope he never gets bored and exploits the universe…

[@MastaDRD]

Bruh he already has. How do you think we got the Yorkshire Tea plant?

[@Le_funnyname]

Imagine sneezing and clicking the cookie at the end

[@Thongyful]

There have been worse sneezing mishaps...

[@NWolfsson]

Spiff: I don't know how we're making cookies out of plants... The Poet's answer: Life finds a way. The Scholar's answer: Cocoa, wheat and sugar beet.

[@Liliththelizard]

Does cookie dough count as dinner? Asking for a friend...

[@thespiffingbrit]

If you are happy with having worse teeth than the brits then sure go for it!

[@Liliththelizard]

@@thespiffingbrit well... teeth can be replaced🤔 so it's totally worth it

[@pixelartkid7965]

@@Liliththelizard metal teeth.

[@leovbernardo]

You're hilarious! Your script (or not) is so engaging and funny. You're brilliant!!

[@MagicAndWires]

Speedrunning Cookie clicker for the speed baking I-III achievements is apparently too mundane for Spiff !

[@U-Trance]

One of the ways i used to play with an autoclicker is making the browserwindow supersmall and that way youd always hit the golden cookies

[@ezzzzyyy]

Next video: I won drug dealer simulator without dealing drugs

[@oisinoleary4541]

Long live the Irish cookie....and Barry's tea is better than Yorkshire

[@HDTomo]

Incorrect

[@Everything13ish]

Even Sir Patrick Stewart Drinks Yorkshire!

[@ColinTimmins]

Spiff you have earned your tea biscuit with this video, well done! =]

[@epistimonkapetanios]

7:25 Flour, sugar, all the ingredients come from plants. Edit: 8:54 the mine makes no sense though.

[@thatguyintherain3168]

"And today, ladies and gentlemen, I'm going to beat him" -Spiff out of context, 2022

[@kitchentroll5868]

Jump through the game developers' hoops? Spiff says, I ain't got no time for that, I'll speed-run your game MY way. (Cue Sid Vicious' punk cover of "My Way")

[@maxwellfreeland5898]

I love how he casually calls out dream

[@yokyopeli1104]

03:30 "Record braking speed" :D It was so hilarious! And the shaking picture :D

[@Mint_Of_Leaf]

Haven’t even watched it but I already have my tea and “gaming supplements”😁

[@sandronecromancer]

Speedruner and Exploiter competed in a game. Speedruner finished it first. Exploiter still won.

[@kerilithia]

This is such an amazing achievement. As long as you are doing old number progressive games, I wonder if it is possible to speed run candy box 2?

[@LuxGamer16]

Easyspeezy: speedruns cookieclicker SpliffingBrit: i can do it faster SpeedrunStaff:*adds new category*

[@DaysofKnight]

Funny part is, this wasn't even really an exploit. Christmas time not only is a legitimate holiday, but a legitimate feature within the game. You need only simply say he could've waited for Christmas time and done the same thing. He only simply altered time, that's it. And that's not really an exploit when you think about him using the legitimate features within the game. So, to me; Spiff is now the world record holder for the Cookie Clicker-No Click speed run at 30:49.82

[@Raffeldy]

He's not, simply because that's a different category in the category extensions: "Holiday - True Neverclick | Golden Cookies" WR is 21:50. Also, for the run to be valid he would've needed to keep the stats open for most of the run.

[@DaysofKnight]

@@Raffeldy I figured there'd be some "extra" person that would reply. Go away and let me enjoy my feelings, instead of ruining them for people

[@Raffeldy]

@@DaysofKnight Sorry man, didn't mean to hurt your feelings. Just thought put that here as info for other people wondering. Hope you can forgive me.

[@wizzlez9615]

How relevant, I've been grossly overplaying this game for the past two days and just did the neverclick challenge myself! Interested to see how your attempt plays out! Mine involved a lot of waiting around doing nothing lol.

[@severalracoons9315]

Spiff I need you to rant about how magnificent tea is so I can make it my ringtone.. please 😂

[@davidbrennan660]

Victory has never been more empty and it is broken as is all Spiff sends his balanced time with.

[@TheUltimm]

this game is the definition of torture

[@jasonblok7360]

no its not dum its fun game dumm dumm

[@TheUltimm]

@@jasonblok7360 its fun but i also have 200 hours on this game... i'm not a masochist lol

[@jasonblok7360]

Yes you can there are 2 achievements on doing it it only takes like 3 hours to get pretty easy 2 achievements unlike endless cycle

[@Kevbo2040]

"You see, one year and one day ago, *ON MAY 15TH* blah blah blah". *peers at date* Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm......

[@Elnotronic]

the opposite of autoclicker

[@doublea125]

Reset Achievements? They wasted an opportunity to label it "clear cookies"

[@d3thkn1ghtmcgee74]

"Whilst he is a professional speed runner, I'm a professional exploiter" I never thought a Brit would be so open with that title! Before this comment goes on fire I'm just joking🤣

[@Jango1989]

"One of the most quintessential parts of being British is to see what others have done and spitefully find the most relaxed way to beat them"

[@greyfox346]

First. Also, I'm amazed I got this here. Here's to taking a lunch break to make some tea.

[@ApostleOfDarkness]

A perfect start to my birthday

[@SkepticX101]

-In a narrative voice) The gods have given this Tea Lover Luck, So that he may not cheat today on the game.

[@solarbreaker6917]

i thought for spiff it'd be the biscuit clicker

[@gretchen8100]

I freaking love your exploits, and I have a new challenge for you: Grounded. I just discovered this lovely survival crafting rpg, and it's my new favorite thing. It's been out for 2 years but is technically still in early access because Obsidian is still finishing the storyline and adding biomes. It seems VERY ripe for you to exploit. Have at it!

[@Skillionair]

I'm convinced spiff mitten squad many a true nerd and easy speezy are all part of the same squad and they chat in discord all the time

[@USER_CYN-7850]

A tip:change your name to isaysopensesame to get dev tools

[@lowochi]

I remember EazySpeezy streaming his speedrun, that vid was hella fun too - ya both great :D

[@mleise8292]

The dog at "I'm a professional exploiter" cracked me up. Thx!

[@surferdude4487]

I don't know how you figure this stuff out, but it's sure fun watching you do it.

[@therealissuetho2171]

Bro sounds like a sports announcer

[@Rusty9017]

lol I just came back to the game randomly and there was a huge update 9 days ago, and now this? Am a happy camper

[@danser_theplayer01]

You can grow sugar cane or sugar beet, you can grow wheat, and you can grow baking fungi. So that's how cookies can be grown on a farm.

[@Uhthis]

Honestly though, imagine having your job being exploiting games and challenges in the most ridiculous way you can think up... Spiffing Brit, you've GOT it going, man.

[@Т1000-м1и]

Thanks for this glorious guide to accomplishing prosperity in all aspects of life

[@acoolnameemm]

oh no. this made me pick up Cookie Clicker again

[@masterjbt]

The spiffiest man has speedran the clicks of the cookies

[@Hunter_238]

if he opens a bakery is should be called Gregg's list

[@angeldude101]

With his much of a completionist I can be, I forget the last time I've done a Cookie Clicker run that _didn't_ get True Neverclick.

[@techhelpwizardgenie3146]

I'm glad to know that this is what you spend your valuable time doing.

[@Chris_Bacon]

As someone who is currently doing a legacy true neverclick (Never clicking the big cookie your entire gameplay), the fact that someone else is going for a TNC makes me feel warm.

[@ilovetrafficcones]

How do you make any cookies?

[@Chris_Bacon]

@@ilovetrafficcones i might have used the worng words for my comment. i meant that i never clicked the big cookie my entire gameplay. however, this still lets me interact with other buttons such as buildings and upgrades, etc. outside cristmas, there are golden cookies, which spawns in every 15 minutes ( i guess). they have a certain chance to trigger the buff "Lucky" where it gives you a few cookies depending on your current cps (cookies per second). since i have the cps of 0, it gives me 13 which is the lowest value it could get. get these twice and you got yourself your first cursor. and its just smooth sailing from there.