They drive on the other side of the road here | Euro Truck Simulator 2

If you're watching this you're waiting for either:
A - a catastrophic accident
B - the driver to yell abuse at other road users
C - the steering wheel to fall off, not that you can see it
D - a bunch of random anecdotes and pseudo-facts
If none of those things are of interest, stop watching now. If you feel the need to offer unsolicited guidance, save your fingers (not that you will, it's BURNING inside you, and even if you resist posting said guidance you will instead post "I have so much unsolicited guidance, yet I have resisted the urge to post it" because the need to flex the number of hours you've sunk in cannot be ignored.)
Every landmark I point out in today's episode isn't correct. Apart from, maybe, fake Sizewell, but again, I doubt it.
This series is gloriously presented without episode numbers, because you can watch them in any order and it doesn't get any better.
*****
If you'd like support the channel, join in with some multiplayer action and/or hang out with some of the friendliest people on the internet, fling less-than-a-coffee's worth of currency at one of the two destinations below and get more gubbins, including the opportunity to join members-only games and the monthly Colonel Failure "vlog", which is a vlog.
Two ways to get with the program-
Option 1 (several different tiers available): Patreon - / colonelfailure
Option 2 (one size-fits all): KZbin - kzbin.info...

[@ThrashNeon]

"Oh fer f-... pity's sake!" 😂 Masterful recovery.

[@colonelfailure]

Yeah. Next episode includes bleeping.

[@alexandermallett1852]

@@colonelfailurebrings back tourist bus simulator memories!

[@RazzUK]

I miss those early 2000s data entry jobs. Everyone thought I was a computer wizard.

[@colonelfailure]

Exactly right (although in my case early 90s). Mind numbingly tedious though.

[@gospatricdeyi2393]

Loved the wheel repair during intro 🔧🔧🔧

[@tbjtbj7930]

"I'll just go and hope for the best" My sister did that once. Drove into the side of a truck.

[@lesley-annemclelland857]

I'm loving the Colonel trying to park up his trucks. Partner came over to see what the Colonel was up to and without hesitation she says "he's going in the wrong way." So speaketh an "expert" in driving Euro Truck and American Truck simulator.😂

[@natgrant1364]

I've never played any of them and I thought it was fairly obvious. I have to remember that "fairly obvious" for most of us doesn't necessarily translate to the Colonels way of thinking.

[@vincewilson1]

@@natgrant1364 We come here for the drama and CF knows this.

[@C4Aries]

Minor factoid about Trains, as you mention train training. Two short burts means you're moving forward, three short burts is for backup. At least that's the case in the US/Canada. Thank you for coming to my TED talk.

[@colonelfailure]

This is vital to my improvement.

[@C4Aries]

@@colonelfailure I knew it would be, you're welcome. 😂 I'll be sure to continue to offer my sage railroader wisdom 🤣

[@antygod]

@@C4Aries did you mean bursts?

[@C4Aries]

@@antygod I'm so bad at proofreading. yes i did.

[@antygod]

@@C4Aries coolio, i wasn't sure if it was some technical term or something

[@vincewilson1]

Next a cop will pulls you over and Inspector Calaham steps out and says "Do you feel lucky punk... Well, do ya?"

[@anthony_horton]

Last time I drove a French built car was a rental Peugot a year and a half ago. Funnily enough it had electrical problems. Its particular trick was spontaneously opening windows. At one point it did this with the driver's side window while parked up for the night during a delightful evening of near horizontal rain, with the wind coming from the driver's side. I got to spend the remaining week of the rental sitting in a cold, soggy driver's seat, despite my best efforts to dry it out using the seat warmer. Of course being electrical (and now wet) the heated seat itself failed after a few days of heavy use.

[@jsprague2453]

I'm thoroughly enjoying Uncle Colonel Failure's Storytime About French Cars!

[@colliefields4637]

You know your enjoying an ETS2 video when you jump onto Steam and buy four map DLCs that are 70% off on sale whilst simultaneously watching the video. It's been ages since I last played ETS2! (stopped shortly after buying the France one). Wish they would hurry up and make a United Kingdom/British Isles DLC for this game though! This is an area that really needs some love put into it.

[@maidenminnesota1]

My ETS/ATS games are broken. Truck refuses to go forward. Only drives in reverse, and even when out of gear still goes. You have to hold the brake. Don't know what's wrong with it. Might have to uninstall/reinstall or something.

[@stevekenilworth]

answer is Promods the map add on changes the uk a lot and looks so much more like the uk

[@Electricfox]

The 'new' Ipswich one way system is a mystery unknown to man.

[@colonelfailure]

There's a new one?

[@natgrant1364]

34:04 I wouldn't feel too bad. I'll explain. A while back I was playing Forza Horizon 4 and a bit of Horizon 3. The fourth one takes place in Britain so drive on the left. The third one is set in Australia so you're still driving on the left. After quite a lot of that, I had a day when I felt like starting up the first one, which is set in the lovely state of Colorado. I pulled out onto a road on the left side. No traffic so I didn't notice. Turned onto another road, being sure to stay left. Suddenly remembered where I was when cars started coming at me head on. Bear with me. Brief life story. I was born in Utah in 1972. In 1975, when I was 3 years old, my Dad got a new job and moved us to the neighboring state of.... Colorado, where I've lived ever since. 😕 So like I said, I wouldn't feel too bad.

[@The1402784]

You can do a new series of driving here and reading something so we enjoy your voice, up until something happens in middle of your calm reading which makes your book reading super exciting. It is impossible for you not to get in trouble in this game. It will be so much fun and I can't wait for the next one that includes some bleeping 😂😂

[@Shakads]

Oh boy, I share the same experience with electrical problems, in fact they are also the reason why I'll never own a French car again, and I'm French ! Still remember when I would turn the left indicators on, randomly they would turn themselves off and the headlights would turn on for a few seconds... I ended up having to drive with the lights always on, so that people wouldn't think I was flashing them... 😅 Loved the 206 Quiksilver though, fun little car it was.

[@BlackburnBigdragon]

I have no problem driving in American Truck Simulator. Eurotruck 2 is like "American Truck Simulator Hard Mode". The roads are so narrow that driving through them is like threading a needle with a soup can. Good luck trying to get one of the "Oversize Loads" to their destination in Eurotruck. Every time I try an Oversized load in Eurotruck, I just end up getting the load wedges in horrible predicamate that end up resembling that famous Austin Powers golf cart scene. And that's just trying to get the oversize load down a ramp onto or off a highway.

[@MrStabby19812]

It's even more fun when you mod in American trucks into ETS it like trying to turn an aircraft carrier down those motorway ramps lol

[@timjerrom7173]

Just when you got to Europe and said "power up" that's when my internet goes down... Thought it was a part of the video, hah.

[@papasmurfette007]

So, the Colonel used to work at the docks. They call it 'doing data entry' these days do they? Do the suspenders and stockings still fit?...

[@colliefields4637]

"Colonel used to work on the docks, union's been on strike He's down on his luck, it's tough, so tough"🎶

[@eurekasteve7747]

It is not a simulator......There are no Potholes

[@ajaxengineco]

Your reminisces on driving in the south are well worth hearing all on their own! Dartford Tunnel, unpleasant enough even if you haven't nuked your head-gasket from orbit...

[@DecPlays_]

"Don't just change your speed arbitrarily" hey look at that, just like real life

[@cyberfutur5000]

They once built a nice plane in Felixstowe, that's what I knew about the city before learning how it ranks in European container port tableau. Edit: My parents and my grandparents both had a Renault and both always had broken electronics (besides the wheel installed on the intended side)

[@troyjernigan5303]

I am very much enjoying this guided tour of England. Having no clue what you're talking about. It's lovely.

[@Dscha]

"Don't be gentle, it's a rental"

[@ChrisJones-hv7mo]

Other vehicles totally ignore blinkers. Any accident is your fault, though you can usually push other vehicles around without penalty as long as the combined speed is less than about 2mph You can play ETS2 as a video game or a simulator by changing equipment and settings. It's that flexible. For a (MUCH) better UK map, add ProMods to the game (on a second profile). This is not an official map, so whenever a new version comes out, you have to wait until ProMods updates as well before you can use it again. It also adds/ improves other countries (from Iceland to the Middle East). SCS may eventually update the UK in a new update like they just did for Switzerland.

[@BlackburnBigdragon]

I got a kick out of how he was driving thinking that he had solved the headlight problem without the headlights on, and just his running lights going.

[@lnrbry]

Ah Woodbridge. I just happened to be stationed at RAF Bentwaters way back in the day.

[@Electricfox]

I do miss the A10s.

[@lnrbry]

@@Electricfox You know its funny. it was built for one thing. and it did/ does it better than anything else they could design. Yet every turn of the calendar, there is news of the military wanting to retire it. Of course.. we are still flying the B-52's so maybe there is hope. But yeah. I have a fondness for the A10.. even though as an ordinance troop, it was a hell of a lot of work. I mean every time they flew, we had to inspect 1150 rounds of 30mm, per plane.. and you may remember how often they flew.. :D

[@sauluxville]

The electric problems with your Nissan sounded exactly like something right out the Pacific Drive game, where your car would develop certain quirks over time, which you then have to diagnose and fix. By the way, that quaint game might be just up your alley, with its anomalies and vast potential for failure. Have you seen it?

[@cabe_bedlam]

Run out of trees? Has someone been at the high-detailing again?

[@JasonTheRockBard]

The windshield wipers... and the return of the windshield wipers had me laughin'.

[@MaebhsUrbanity]

Though it is a delight as it is, I would recommend promods map mod gives you a big boost in localisation and scenery, especially in the UK with just one mod, It does need most of the dlc which I don't know if you've got though. Plus a comedically dramatic (but not actually that long) post Brexit customs at the channel tunnel!

[@shorne403]

with skills like this, swift transport in usa will be wanting you to drive for them lol

[@mrhipbone]

This simultaneously fills me with elation & anguish... Marvellous.

[@centsparta4280]

loving it

[@timhansen6951]

a few fun things to do 1 at a port knock something in the water 2 at a railroad crossing hit a civilian car hard enough to go over the railguards 3 at a bridge that can open park in the middle (the one latvia is pretty good it in the city connected to sweden) 4 the void its there just behind the cosses and arrows and the invisible walls SPOILER 1 suface water is solid so if you push a car into the water it will just be parked on the surface 2 this one weird the train will hit your truck but it just treats civiliancars like ghosts 3 this ones kinda funny the bridge opens through the truck leaving floating in midair and when the sip will just pass through the truck like nothing an comes back down again after like it neverhappend 4 this one is hard to find in some rareplaces across theworld the developping team forgot to create the boundriesto the void no warning no nothing just your truck doing its death roll (its a lot easier to find in American truck simulator)

[@bob_._.]

Great, now I'm going to spend six months or so searching for the flippin' Oil Well Bridge.

[@colonelfailure]

Orwell :)

[@bob_._.]

@@colonelfailure Yah, I did find it on google earth but decided to leave the comment up for the (hopefully) comedic effect.

[@MikelNaUsaCom]

love the simulated euro-road rage. =D

[@theeutecticpoint]

pure gold

[@karnerkreativ]

You have been a member of the Fail Brigade for too long if you already knew what the electrical problems of the Nissan are.

[@colonelfailure]

Or you've just been paying attention :)

[@ashuggtube]

Significantly less clever than he sounds? No no! This is a great untruth.

[@HyperBlueWolf]

Using a Motor Vehicle When Headlamps are not Lit in [Poor Visibility / Darkness] in the UK is illegal. Contrary to regulation 25(1) of the Road Vehicles Lighting Regulations 1989, section 42 of the Road Traffic Act 1988 and Schedule 2 of the Road Traffic Offenders Act 1988. This offence carries a fine of £50 and no penalty points

[@colonelfailure]

While yes, that's true, how do you explain broad daylight? Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm?

[@HyperBlueWolf]

​@@colonelfailure I blame Volvo drivers... They always have their headlights on 24/7, so that's probably where the inspiration came from.

[@MrStabby19812]

​@@colonelfailurebecause you still need your marker lights on lol it's cycles between marker >headlights > off. Your highbeams are on another button. ❤

[@MetaJokeTT]

You will turn on your headlights and you will like it!

[@MrLampbus]

There is a spiral car park in central Newcastle. It goes up rather than down. ALso, there is a spiral car park that goes down in Annecy, France ... right next to the lake. Pack skuba gear?

[@JohnnyDrizzle]

Flippin' Nora!

[@MrBnsftrain]

Well now I know why they don't sell French cars in America. But somehow, we bought French trains that take four years to enter service

[@pipedreamin]

They’re adding an electric Renault soon, I’m sure the electrics will be perfect. You should get a Renault in honor of your great love of French vehicles.

[@clement137]

Instead of buying car made in Birmingham ? 😂 (Don't yell at me , I'm french)

[@MaebhsUrbanity]

Managed to find a neat solution to our problems regarding the car alarm, it's a separate module, just yank it out and hope no thieves notice (;

[@MerlinKernow75]

And I thought my truck driving was bad. 🚚🚚

[@TetraDax]

This series is a problem for me, because it really makes me want to pick up the game again. I do not have time for that void. I barely survived the Farming Simulator series.

[@ChrisComley]

I used to fill my landie at the truck pump. Well it had a 100l tank so it wasn't unreasonable. New guy at the station decided not to allow it however. :(

[@jeffbishop9404]

Peugeot 306dt, one of the best diesel cars ever built Colonel. 2nd only to the 405.. 🙂 PS: I thought they were built in Ryton, here in the U.K 🤷‍♂

[@harmzegt8066]

Holy moly you are really 3D impared. Every turn while parking you overcook. By the way: map the looking left/right on the steer. The gearbox need tuning so it does not full rev all the time. And you need to trim the brakes in the menu.

[@scottsmith1525]

I have a Nissan, my 2nd one now actually. Sometimes I would go get in and the trunk was popped up, I have had the "alarm" thing too. I had determined that it was always when the key fob was in my pocket, and either the "panic button, or truck release on the fob got pushed by being in my pocket. I don't know if that is what's happening with yours. The one I just bought has the auto liftgate, and I suppose it's just a matter of time before I find it wide open one of these days.

[@robtippin9111]

😎

[@Dearestandme]

2:34 flying cars

[@stevekenilworth]

29:53 strictly speaking should be a 40. nope they changed that years ago, England and wales on single carriageways it is 50 but Scotland being Scotland did not follow the rule change and they still at 40 prob huge money maker as tourists also towing i think is effected and a lot trucks from across the channel so they get ust to England 50 and easy to get caught out entering Scotland i guess it caught a lot out. but England Wales and n Ireland its 50 on single and 60 duel and m road but ive sat behind many trucks west of north wales sitting at 60 its a really fast bit roads even 60 feels slow one road a straight road goes for miles and either side great view of Snowdoina mountains then its forest road whats still fast and very pretty but one town ive seen catch out a lot truckers steep down hill after loads fast easy roads straight in to a 30 but now a 20 mid corner and trucks can be at over 40 ive sat behind a truck next sec im in clouds smoke as looking up tires struggling to slow and speed trap van all ready to take your money and points ive been luck as stuck behind a truck the first time so knew for future piggy bank waiting to catch you in that town

[@jontaylor1652]

Lmao, Best Truck Driver in the World Ever!

[@colonelfailure]

Facts.

[@maliciousintent5697]

You can turn off the speed limit in the trucks in the setting in game

[@Pjs-ge7gk]

looking forward to full release of Star trucker?

[@colonelfailure]

Oh yes.

[@textbookdave5337]

True about "Kentish" drivers, although one wonders if there is an incorrect vowel in there somewhere?

[@jamesphillips4637]

Not backseat driving just a passenger side suggesting the speed limiters can be turned off in the options

[@mr.g161]

belligerence 101

[@TheLeonhamm]

LOL ;o)

[@stevekenilworth]

should be using promods the uk looks like the uk then and junctions and port is so much more realistic

[@Pepijntrein]

You can actually remove the speedlimiter in de settings gameplay already when you aren’t yet driving your own truck

[@bjarnenilsson80]

@ColonelFaliure so niw the question becomes leftt or right side cab, Sp are ayou going to pe mainly in mainland euri\ope or th UK?

[@colonelfailure]

Whichever I deem most zesty.

[@pipedreamin]

If you’re going continental then pick right-hand, if UK, left-hand - that will keep things interesting 😂

[@maidenminnesota1]

They drive on the other side of the road in MOST places. Just sayin'.

[@stevekenilworth]

want more reliable car prob import from japan you get some very low miles cars even if a tad old almost rust free as they don't use salt on the roads and uk has importers what do all the paperwork stuff and you get pretty cool cars, im tempted a micro van 4 seats and mad 660cc and top speed of 74mpg at 8500rpm so not fast but fun sounding engine and 23 years old and 40k miles and seen one few years newer 13k miles a new van i cannot see any rust its like new and new miles for £7500 and city driving it be loads fun but even if not after van lots cool cars you get from japan just buy one what uses same engine what other cars in uk uses and parts and maintenance not an issue but coming frm japan it be very reliable and they right hand drive. two option for next car what i plan to keep a very long time another Hyundai i20 mines been very reliable for last 54 months and only cost me £800 in nearly 5 years in maintenance and that inc a clutch at 100k miles, only down side to Hyundai is paint it could be better but mechanics they seen to do very well and if you research common faults what kill them you fix it before it goes like i20 engine i have a chain can stretch or a bracket what holds tension can fail at around 100k mile mark so be easy on it at those miles till you sort it and its not crazy cost just over what the clutch costs but as planning getting another car soon that be for next owner so another i20 and i know how to make it very long lived car or micro kie van what i struggle to get speeding ticket and funny thing is im more tempted by the micro van with 4 seats and rear seat fold flat and no seat belts in the back but long trip have bed in the back and away to make a coffee, ideal speed ive been told 50-60 mph more closer to 50 mph and 60-70 short periods time but i mostly take back roads so van speed not so much an issue . be careful what you buy as a lot car brands now share engines like vauxhall think they use fiat engines, same goes with some ford cars like the ford ka is a fiat 500 and has same faults so doing research before you buy a car is important esp these days and cost cutting on the cards and best way for that is share parts and engines

[@BritishKnight40]

Colonel is it true that Guy Fieri is just a Colonel Failure wannabe? 😂

[@RustyITNerd]

First? Edit: I'm in for all four options as you never disappoint, Colonel.

[@Mudge0001]

your lights fine and the fact you had to pay when that 2nd car hit you in Felex' is exactly why I have those fines turned off. I do recommend having some mods like ProMods which is a map based mod, it doesn't change the English roads, though it does add some towns, but it drastically improves visuals and all those fun things... then I'd say grab the Real companies from Steam workshop and Bob's ya mother's brother... While KZbin would jump all over you the moment you used any music they don't give a wag of a tally about visual representation of real companies.

[@HyperBlueWolf]

His FPS was a slideshow in parts of the base UK map... Do you really think his PC would handle running promods above 20FPS ???? 😂😂😂

[@colonelfailure]

"slide show" I didn't notice. Definitely didn't see any 1-3 digit FPS moments.

[@Mudge0001]

@@colonelfailure neither did I game looked fine to me

[@Stone2200]

100 km/h is 62 mph not 60 mph 😀Trucks are limited at 90 km/h or 56mph.

[@colonelfailure]

Pedant.

[@Stone2200]

@@colonelfailure Defintely 😂

[@LegitimateCo]

Lorry

[@Borgscan]

Renault mostly owns Nissan, that's why you're having problems.

[@rogermusson4110]

Whe I was a lad, a truck was something you hitched onto freight trains. An open wagon suitable for transporting coal or the like. What you are driving is a lorry. All these Americanisms ...

[@colonelfailure]

International channel, for international viewership. Everyone knows what a truck is. Calling it a lorry makes me sound like I'm 6.

[@rogermusson4110]

@@colonelfailure Teehee.