Things I didn't Expect HRT to Change - MtF transgender

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[@altairtheeagle]

You are a total trophy wife ❤

[@SteIIar]

You’re a man and always will be. Cope ✌️😂

[@ragnorockcookie2868]

There are bunch of reasons why makeup is expensive but also shouldn't be too expensive. Some of the stuff is actually over prize to the point where it's like yeah it's a scam. But at the same time it isn't because dyes are expensive to make produce and get the right to use them

[@FirstRebel89]

Thank you,I subscribed in year plan.❤

[@LiviuHomalăulSectar]

Your not American, you have a accent

[@jasminegailey7510]

I didn’t start to transition until I was 41. I’ve been through a lot of changes as well since I’ve been on hrt since March of last year. I’m much happier now. I love your videos

[@Kira-zm7vy]

41 as well. And I'm afraid I've waited too long. Are you getting good physical changes from hormones? Like body hair reduction. I'm rather hairy and am afraid ill have to get all if it removed with laser or electrolysis

[@jasminegailey7510]

@@Kira-zm7vy I’m 43 now and after a 1.5 years on hrt. The changes I see I’m very happy with. Only thing is my facial hair. The hormones have slowed as it slowed the hair growth on the rest of my body. Don’t be afraid. It’s never to late. When I first started out I was also following Jackie Rabbit on KZbin. She’s in her 50’s when she started transitioning. Age don’t me anything when it comes to life changes.

[@JoeMama-rv9wl]

@@Kira-zm7vy dont be a retard

[@Kira-zm7vy]

@@JoeMama-rv9wl I wonder what compells someone to say that? I don't think I said anything to warrant it. But whatever 🤷🏻‍♀️, you keep on being the best asshole you can be.

[@redberryterf]

You are a sick man.

[@jastisfiagstist]

Mathilda , my father yelling at me for 1 hours because of i am watching your videos I am really so sick of his transphobia , he is like you are gonna be dead if u don't stop wanting to look like that thing to me, I am really so sorry to send this comment but there is no one that I can talk to . Maybe someone lives similiar things can find me thanks to that comment .

[@yurmabeechaudits3522]

Take solace in these two facts: 1. most people aren't going to kill anyone and so long as you're breathing no one can really determine how you live except you. 2. If you want people to accept you for who ypu feel you are, you must also accept them for who they feel they are. Hating someone for hating you never resolves anything. You simply serve to give them power when you allow them to get you upset. Just look at him and say "okay dad. Have a good day. I love you". Haters are gonna hate, don't waste energy on them.

[@BeccaBecca71]

08:18 the ppl around you I would respectfully try to get on blockers,, pursue inner development, and save up for transition when you are legal

[@BeccaBecca71]

Your awareness at a young age its good to continue all of your inner growth and research, soak it up! Androgynous femme' is a warm little niche I rest for peace, hush the media tensions and hear God and my inner voice (feminine) (Kidney stones? Is that really my greatest health risk? - * ACV and clean food) Every (day) 3-5 yr cycles I struggle purging, religious fastings, seeking, fighting etc (2016 start, 2022 HRT 6 mos) Religious ppl don't live in my head, they know their head, not mine You have plenty of time (Cis)Testosterone also made slow changes in me, I should have pursued this (mtf) at a much younger age, example- my mustache was invisible till I was 30, i was alot smaller, my chest matched my age in 30s becoming bigger masculine

[@sophiajones1-]

Wow. I went through the same thing. I lived with two different adoptive sets of parents and I got kicked out of both just because I am transgender.

[@guillaumekeulen219]

Search for the nearest LHBTI+ support group/ organisation and get some real life peer support Its help when getting kicked out or in need to run! Transgender+ homeles is a disaster

[@Catarinasunnergren]

14 months on HRT. I expected the emotion stuff.. I expected the loss of strength and the weird food cravings, the change in taste buyds, I expected the scent changes.. both the sense of smell and what I smell like.. and the sweating less.. what I did NOT expect was how much boobs sweat! It seems they picked upp ALL the slack when the rest of the body reduced the sweating. I mean god DAMN these things can sweat! Haven't had bottom surgery yet but yea my libido has shifted from low to gone. Oh well.

[@wsuxtrap6640]

Izzy Moonbow 😊

[@Catarinasunnergren]

@@JR-mr1tw Transfobic AND acephobic? Are we playing bigotry bingo here?

[@Catarinasunnergren]

@J R I didn't assign anything to myself, my identity is my identity. I can't not be me, I have tried. For decades. What is meaningless is bigoted fools imagining their unfounded opinions on thing they are willfully ignorant of having any sort of relevance to anyone or anything.

[@Catarinasunnergren]

@@JR-mr1tw Your views are still completely irrelevant as them stem from complete and utter ignorance and the only thing you bring to the table is self richeaus bigotry. Enough time has been wasted on you, toodles.

[@Chasity829]

I've been on girl hormone hrt for almost 6 months now so what will I expect on the 7th month someone please tell me so I know thx

[@DarDarBinks1986]

I'm two years into HRT now and it's been quite a ride. Clothing: I don't always buy new. I bought much of my wardrobe at thrift stores. Some items were hand-me-downs from my mom. I only buy new if I absolutely need to. Makeup: Why is it so expensive? There's no reason for makeup to be expensive. Thankfully, I work in a major chain drugstore and get 20% off for working there, so I don't pay as much for my makeup. Beats going to Ulta, which is overpriced. Mood and emotions: I have far more access to more emotions than I did when I ran on testosterone. I cry more often than I did before. Highs are higher and lows are lower. The time has gone by very quick since I started transitioning two years ago. Estrogen and spironolactone have saved my life. They've done far more for me than anything else ever did.

[@Ta-da32]

What does makeup have to do with being a woman?

[@erinangela1972]

In my life I feel as though the lows are frequent and the highs are nearly non-existent.

[@adamjohannesson3434]

@@DarDarBinks1986 my heartfelt congrats.

[@adamjohannesson3434]

@@Ta-da32 seems women like make up

[@AnEarthPerson]

@@Ta-da32probably because women like to use makeup to feel pretty. (Really not that deep 😭)

[@caitlinbrierley1699]

I put off transitioning for a long time because of the fallout from other people, namely family. In the end my reasoning was better a trans daughter than a dead son. Sorry for the grim. Anyways I've been on HRT since 26/5/2021 and have had some wonderful changes xx

[@Luaqunix]

that's wonderful! Hopefully I could get on HRT soon too

[@MusicSetAdrift]

You too, can do to yourself what they did to Alan Turing XD.

[@tommychappell6359]

Why a dead son? No I mean what do you mean? (I don't understand).

[@beeeeeesbury]

@@tommychappell6359 not transitioning breaks you, it mentally scars you so much that suicide is the only option.

[@tommychappell6359]

@@beeeeeesbury ohh noooooooooooo. In this case I definitely agree. I would Loveeeee to have a beautiful daughter in my home :))) 💖💕 🥰🤗 I mean son or daughter doesn't matterrr. I'm ok with it, if they're comfortable in themselves obviously. That's main thing :)

[@Riel_Rami]

I'm watching to see what my girlfriend will go through once she begins her transition and how I can support. Very useful video. 👌

[@morbidmanuscript9324]

I wish more people were supportive like you

[@verastrike1415]

"You're not going to look like a Victoria's Secret model," she says, while looking like a model. XD

[@nisagomez4366]

My first time shopping for makeup, I went to Ulta. It was busy. I took my stuff and got in Iine. I got to the register and the girl rang me up. I looked at the total and said “who knew being a girl was so expensive!”. All the women in line laughed. 😂

[@clapbangrun2200]

That’s really sexiest though

[@4zir856]

its not being a girl what is expensitve, but buying make up is. Its not like men get it cheaper or something.

[@yummytummy9912]

That’s hella misogynistic tho lol

[@jnharton]

@@4zir856It's far less common for men to buy makeup, though, and even then it might be for their girlfriend or wife rather than for personal use.

[@TheRealJellyBomb]

I'm a prostitute. I'm currently transitioning to female. I'm also fat (322 pounds, 5 ft. 1). I don't know if there's something wrong with me, but I enjoy my customers finishing on my face. Maybe it's my self hatred. Maybe it's just the woman in me, that I'm hoping to get out. Hopefully the transition will make me hate myself less. I don't know where I belong. I need some kind of base... One thing I know, I'm not a man, I'm a woman, no matter what anyone says. Science is just some right wing misogynistic patriarchal tool to keep me and my fellow prostitutes down.

[@jessicadawn2612]

Becoming the true u isn't cheap. Being female cost a lot of money. But I knew about everything u said.

[@silkebroxdude7625]

Trans "women" are not female

[@wendybutler1681]

Girls play with makeup starting about 10. By the time they actually start wearing makeup they have some skills and a bit of product knowledge. Transitioning to female at a later age and BOOM there you are with no experience standing in the beauty department without a clue. Scary enough for a cis woman to have to find a new foundation formula or shade. And it's so costly if a product just doesn't work for you. Discouraging, too.

[@silkebroxdude7625]

@@wendybutler1681 Mathilda is not a girl or female

[@uriurw8630]

@@silkebroxdude7625 she is most definitely not a female, no transgirl is a female but she's a transgirl, not a cisgirl.

[@silkebroxdude7625]

@@uriurw8630 he makes videos with acronyms with mtf

[@Name.she-her-hers]

15 months on hrt. Something else to note is the speed can be very different. I have a trans friend that changed drastically within her first few months, but then started to change slowly. On the other hand, I started off slow but continued to make progress as time went on. Never look at timelines and expect to be a certain place at a certain time. Instead, understand it may take a while and just be happy if you change faster than expected

[@TheRealJellyBomb]

I'm a prostitute. I'm currently transitioning to female. I'm also fat (322 pounds, 5 ft. 1). I don't know if there's something wrong with me, but I enjoy my customers finishing on my face. Maybe it's my self hatred. Maybe it's just the woman in me, that I'm hoping to get out. Hopefully the transition will make me hate myself less. I don't know where I belong. I need some kind of base... One thing I know, I'm not a man, I'm a woman, no matter what anyone says. Science is just some right wing misogynistic patriarchal tool to keep me and my fellow prostitutes down.

[@ColdBaltBlue]

I’m going the opposite direction as you (FTM), and while I expected just about all of the changes I’ve gone through in 3 years of HRT, I didn’t think I’d change to such a degree. My muscle and fat structure totally changed, I have nearly the voice I’ve always wanted to have, my facial structure is more defined, and I went from a C cup to an A cup. It’s incredible! Still gotta work on the beard growth patterns though, it doesn’t want to crawl past my neck yet.

[@garethbaus5471]

As a cisgender man the facial hair thing doesn't work out for everyone. I can't grow a proper beard, and based on family history probably never will.

[@ominouscap5813]

Why the change if you don't mind me asking? Put some thought into mtf but probably won't due to relatives and money. What is it like being a girl?

[@ColdBaltBlue]

@@ominouscap5813 Well, I can only tell you what it’s like from 18 years of experience being *treated* like a girl. I cannot tell you what it *feels* like. You’d be better off asking that question to a cis woman. As for the reason, it’s the same reason why any other trans person transitions: to have a body that matches our gender and perception of ourselves.

[@CuteWeirdoGamer]

0:00 Intro 0:27 Sponsor 2:00 Cost 3:17 Emotional Range 4:23 Sent Change 5:15 Libido 6:28 You Won’t Be A Completely New Person 8:11 It’ll Be Hard On You & Others Around You

[@thejester1039]

I'm late but thank you

[@teresaravenshaw5477]

@CuteWeirdoGamer "Scent" not "sent" for smell.

[@coreyhansen4241]

Hi, Mathilda. I'm Corey, and I just subscribed to your Chanel. I'm writing this message as I'm watching your video. I want to let you know that you have my total support. I want to let you know that I'm the kind of person who accepts other people for who they are deep inside, because I know what it's like to be different, because I have a disability physically. And my disability does make me different. But, I got through the rough times I had growing up. I was picked on a lot when I was growing up, because of me having a disability. Plus, i was born with a Cleft palette and lip, but I had good Drs who did every they could to help me. I wish you all the best with your KZbin Chanel, good luck with it. Corey. Corey Hansen from Canada.

[@ostingerhardt2975]

wholesome internet user :) im also transfem but i havent transitioned yet haha (im broke aa) hope you have a wonderful day and can continue thriving - abigail

[@EmpoDaddy99]

@@ostingerhardt2975 ayyy can't transition because we're broke gang! - Melissa

[@BiggusDickus-gc7fp]

​@@EmpoDaddy99repping gangs can get you maced and other things

[@coreybunting1147]

Another Corey here. And I approve.

[@Jocelyn2189]

I just started coming out about it these last couple weeks, still don’t dress in public as society terrifies me still (I hope I get over that - I break down sometimes not being able to wear a dress to work) I haven’t been on HRT but I’m diabetic and 35 so I’m a little worried that might pose a problem, which would crush me. I finally made up my mind this year, if there was a button I could push that would change me into a women I would push that button 100:10 times. Been having these thoughts about being in the wrong body and with the wrong people since I was in third grade. Keep posting. Love your stuff and is helping give this newly trans woman some hope and reality checks at the same time 💕💋

[@emilia_tezuka801]

from my experience im so glad it wasnt hard for the people around me to accept the changes that I did, I still hangout with friends that I met more than 10 years ago, Im so grateful for that Also, there are a couple more changes u didnt mention that are worth mentioning, without realizing u will change the way u walk, like a woman which is such a subtle but noticeable change when u are walking down the streets, another weird change is the way u smell other men, like maybe its just me but depending on the situation I get turned on by smelling a guy either bc hes sweaty (without being too dirty) or he just smells good.

[@aurograce2983]

As a male did you ever gain attraction to women by smell similar to how you now experience the smell of men??

[@ms.aelanwyr.ilaicos]

I am very attracted to feminine scents, I'm very curious to see if and how this changes once I start hrt.

[@TheRealJellyBomb]

I'm a prostitute. I'm currently transitioning to female. I'm also fat (322 pounds, 5 ft. 1). I don't know if there's something wrong with me, but I enjoy my customers finishing on my face. Maybe it's my self hatred. Maybe it's just the woman in me, that I'm hoping to get out. Hopefully the transition will make me hate myself less. I don't know where I belong. I need some kind of base... One thing I know, I'm not a man, I'm a woman, no matter what anyone says. Science is just some right wing misogynistic patriarchal tool to keep me and my fellow prostitutes down.

[@renakonar3733]

How would the walk change? A trans-woman still has a man's pelvis bone structure, and therefore, a different center of gravity. Unless, the trans-woman is making a conscious effort to walk differently. There's a trans-woman who works at a small grocery store I go to, and they still walk like a linebacker.

[@fodonogue3]

My sense of smell and my personal scent changed SO much. And my libido is through the damn roof. Those were the biggest changes for me I wasn’t expecting!

[@Moonlightingt484]

I'm interested, in what way would you describe how it changed?

[@fodonogue3]

@@Moonlightingt484 libido or scent/smell? I’ll elaborate more on smell just for the sake of KZbin and people’s usual reäctions. If you’re curious about libido, I’ll have to find a different route to elaborate which will take more time. My personal scent is a lot less… noticeable, in pretty much every way. People used to notice that I’d have a smell after a few short hours at work, even in air-conditioned conditions. Now, I can go days without even BO building up enough for anyone to notice, much less myself when I used to be able to smell myself before others could. I don’t often reäpply deodorant anymore unless it’s really warm somewhere or I’m working closely with people for an assignment, and never have anything brought up. I’ve had friends tell me I no longer even have a scent they can detect. In terms of my sense of smell, it’s definitely become more sensitive. I’m a lot more aware of other people’s BO (especially cis guys), baking is more enjoyable and I can identify more of the subtle scents I wasn’t able to before (such as vanilla or mint which I’ve previously struggled with). Strong scents like patchouli or skunks and such are incredibly nauseating, as is anything ‘waste’ related from bodies (cleaning a cat’s litter box is a task now when I used to be able to do it no problem). BUT! Rain, flowers, nice and subtle perfumes or colognes, cooking/baking, all of it has been so much more enjoyable!

[@mons5267]

​@@fodonogue3 hey, could you talk about libido, mine has gone down considerably and I'm kinda just waiting till bottom surgery to get it back up

[@fodonogue3]

@@mons5267 sure! I had a drop when I was on T blockers but when I started E, it shot through the roof. At first it was tough, but after a few months, it was pervasive but something I could easily tune out. I had an orchie back in December and it’s only gone up from there.

[@TheRealJellyBomb]

I'm a prostitute. I'm currently transitioning to female. I'm also fat (322 pounds, 5 ft. 1). I don't know if there's something wrong with me, but I enjoy my customers finishing on my face. Maybe it's my self hatred. Maybe it's just the woman in me, that I'm hoping to get out. Hopefully the transition will make me hate myself less. I don't know where I belong. I need some kind of base... One thing I know, I'm not a man, I'm a woman, no matter what anyone says. Science is just some right wing misogynistic patriarchal tool to keep me and my fellow prostitutes down.

[@MegaSnow44]

Thanks a lot for your sharing all this, these past few months I've been watching your videos and you helped me a lot to undestand and accept a lot of things in my life, I finally accepted myself and I want to begin this important change in my life, even if my path is a bit different by your, your videos helped and encouraged me a lot, and I can really say in few month my life already improved a lot since I beginned to be and accept myself. You are a really nice person and are you helping a lot of us unsure on how a transition path works and everything, I hope your life will be happy and that your channel continues to help as many people as it is doing for me!

[@TheRealJellyBomb]

I'm a prostitute. I'm currently transitioning to female. I'm also fat (322 pounds, 5 ft. 1). I don't know if there's something wrong with me, but I enjoy my customers finishing on my face. Maybe it's my self hatred. Maybe it's just the woman in me, that I'm hoping to get out. Hopefully the transition will make me hate myself less. I don't know where I belong. I need some kind of base... One thing I know, I'm not a man, I'm a woman, no matter what anyone says. Science is just some right wing misogynistic patriarchal tool to keep me and my fellow prostitutes down.

[@sunnyquinn3888]

Your comment about how you have to remember that you're not suddenly going to change into a Victoria's Secret model or something is very good advice. I'm a transmasc person and when I went through puberty the first time (with my AFAB girl hormones), I had this idea that I was going to end up looking like a supermodel. Was disappointed to find out that post-puberty me looked just like pre-puberty me, except like 2 inches taller, with a big butt and cellulite and free trip to the 5th circle of hell for a week every month. 😕 Now that I'm just starting puberty for the 2nd time (today 11/02/2022 it's been 11 days since my first testosterone shot!), I'm a little older and can manage my expectations a little better and realize I'm probably not gonna emerge from boy puberty looking like a bodybuilder either!

[@TheRealJellyBomb]

I'm a prostitute. I'm currently transitioning to female. I'm also fat (322 pounds, 5 ft. 1). I don't know if there's something wrong with me, but I enjoy my customers finishing on my face. Maybe it's my self hatred. Maybe it's just the woman in me, that I'm hoping to get out. Hopefully the transition will make me hate myself less. I don't know where I belong. I need some kind of base... One thing I know, I'm not a man, I'm a woman, no matter what anyone says. Science is just some right wing misogynistic patriarchal tool to keep me and my fellow prostitutes down.

[@TheRealJellyBomb]

I'm a prostitute. I'm currently transitioning to female. I'm also fat (322 pounds, 5 ft. 1). I don't know if there's something wrong with me, but I enjoy my customers finishing on my face. Maybe it's my self hatred. Maybe it's just the woman in me, that I'm hoping to get out. Hopefully the transition will make me hate myself less. I don't know where I belong. I need some kind of base... One thing I know, I'm not a man, I'm a woman, no matter what anyone says. Science is just some right wing misogynistic patriarchal tool to keep me and my fellow prostitutes down.

[@teresaravenshaw5477]

@sunnyquinn3888 If you put the gym time in then you stand something of a chance, but not if you don't.

[@spacebunsarah]

There were a lot of things I expected from HRT, but expecting them and living them are 2 entirely different things! So far, everything has been a surprise. I think the most shocking change was in my libido not because of how much less it is but because I experience those feelings differently and who I’m attracted to changed significantly. I didn’t realize how much of my attraction from before was gender envy.

[@TheRealJellyBomb]

I'm a prostitute. I'm currently transitioning to female. I'm also fat (322 pounds, 5 ft. 1). I don't know if there's something wrong with me, but I enjoy my customers finishing on my face. Maybe it's my self hatred. Maybe it's just the woman in me, that I'm hoping to get out. Hopefully the transition will make me hate myself less. I don't know where I belong. I need some kind of base... One thing I know, I'm not a man, I'm a woman, no matter what anyone says. Science is just some right wing misogynistic patriarchal tool to keep me and my fellow prostitutes down.

[@jakubzahorski191]

Makeup can be cheap, you dont have to buy 20$ lipstick. I commonly use 2$ or 5$ lipsticks and they work well

[@aliengamer6668]

Where are you getting 2$ lipsticks! Please share your secrets

[@philiphanan1493]

Same. I bought 3 lipsticks on clearance for $2 each at Meier. Red, Pink, and Lavender. Katy Perry’s Lavender lipstick is awesome.

[@davgyyou1554]

Thank you for telling us more facts Mathilda! It helps me alot cause im also in htr, thanks a lot for everything you are amazing✨

[@TheRealJellyBomb]

I'm a prostitute. I'm currently transitioning to female. I'm also fat (322 pounds, 5 ft. 1). I don't know if there's something wrong with me, but I enjoy my customers finishing on my face. Maybe it's my self hatred. Maybe it's just the woman in me, that I'm hoping to get out. Hopefully the transition will make me hate myself less. I don't know where I belong. I need some kind of base... One thing I know, I'm not a man, I'm a woman, no matter what anyone says. Science is just some right wing misogynistic patriarchal tool to keep me and my fellow prostitutes down.

[@ExceptionalOneStandAlone]

I'm a transmasculine agender person and 15, it's always amazing to hear other trans people's stories, although I'm not transitioned. Also, you are so pretty, I must say

[@MusicSetAdrift]

Are you a bot. Thats the dumbest 1st world label I've ever heard of XD. Whats transmasculine in world where you're not supposed to think a mans a girl just for wearing a dress. XD You neo-bigots are something else.

[@ExceptionalOneStandAlone]

@@MusicSetAdrift What? Nothing you said made sense, if you are trying to argue, at least make sense.

[@MusicSetAdrift]

@@ExceptionalOneStandAlone But Transmasculine does?

[@ExceptionalOneStandAlone]

@@MusicSetAdrift Yes, because others use the label, your grammar does not make sense. My label does not effect your life, does it? Then why are trying to make me not use it? Just respect my label, I'm not asking for much.

[@MusicSetAdrift]

​@@ExceptionalOneStandAlone I don't respect labels. I despise them. People who label themselves xyz make me sick. Be a person, not a caricature. Women don't have to be feminine. Men dont have to be masculine. There is no Transmasculine. Transmasculine only exists within bigots. I don't have to tolerate your bigoted views and can respond to any post I see. Of which there are many.

[@mavcotm8006]

When i said to my mother that i feel more like a woman and want to take medical steps she was super sweet and totally ok and supportive with it.. But when i said that i may want to move out to get on my own feet and move in with some friends she almost cried and was really hurt. So yeah change is scary for everyone and we should always support each other (like it always was for my mother and me, and we both are only alive because we have supported each other) i feel super bad...for mentioning the wish of moving out one day(I'm 20 at the start of the next year, i need to get out one day.)

[@jemimahkendall6579]

Legit question but how do you know that you feel like a woman? As an actual woman I can say there is no particular feeling that comes along with being one , you just are one, it's not something we think about constantly

[@mavcotm8006]

@@jemimahkendall6579 It's a bit difficult to decribe a feeling but i try my best(also now i would not use the word feeling anymore but that i know it), this can be different for others since its not an universal experience. For me it was something like that: I as a born boy did many typical boyish things and obviously presented as such, but for some odd reason it made me angry to do them all the time, i had big aggression problems and mood swings for "no reason". I also didn't want to live since i was pretty young but couldn't really put my finger on why it's like that. there were many little signs (too many to list) and I didn't just "decided" i was not a boy, there was a lot of self discovering and accepting myself, many sleepless nights and hard days...it was hard. As an example: When i went shopping with a friend of mine i hated the clothes in the mens section but wanted to try the womens clothes. I always hated my body even though i was trained, like i was going to the gym every day and multiple people told me i look good..the more progress i made the louder my su1cidal thoughts got(i didnt want a male body..but it took a lot of time and tears to figure out and accept that). I also never wanted a relationship because i just "didnt feel ready". After i came out i found a Girlfriend and I couldn't be happier about that fact. I started to change little things about me, starting with nails, growing my hair out, buying more androgynous clothes and using a nickname of my middle name that is a female name and i got earrings etc. All of the changes made me happier. Someone might ask me "Why cant you just live as a feminine man?" And if i just can't imagine myself as a man in the future, i would much rather be dead than to continue living without change. For the first time in my live i know what made me hate myself all the time and i can do something against it, i know that transitioning won't change all my mental problems but it already helps A LOT. I'm on my break rn so maybe i forgot some things, if you have some specific questions you can ask me and i might answer them(but dont be afraid to ask questions, if i feel like im not able to answer a questions I won't do it)

[@TheRealJellyBomb]

I'm a prostitute. I'm currently transitioning to female. I'm also fat (322 pounds, 5 ft. 1). I don't know if there's something wrong with me, but I enjoy my customers finishing on my face. Maybe it's my self hatred. Maybe it's just the woman in me, that I'm hoping to get out. Hopefully the transition will make me hate myself less. I don't know where I belong. I need some kind of base... One thing I know, I'm not a man, I'm a woman, no matter what anyone says. Science is just some right wing misogynistic patriarchal tool to keep me and my fellow prostitutes down.

[@infiniteinfinity9802]

I hear you. I was born female in a female body and always felt like a female just like you said. Be your best true self!!!! Be well!!! So happy your mom is supportive.

[@WingedEspeon]

​@@jemimahkendall6579I think I can answer that. I don't really have a physical feeling of being a woman either. My sister started questioning her gender when I was in college and the first thing I thought to look for was some kind of physical feeling. There was none. I don't have the bottom dysphoria that some trans women talk of, although I get the sense that having the other set of parts wouldn't bother me in the slightest. Some of the things that finally helped me figure it out: Realizing I hated it not being socially acceptable for me to wear dresses. I had tried "crossdressing" and liked how I looked in a dress, but was afraid of people being judgemental, and also creepy dudes hitting on me. Lurking on women's forums and being completely baffled at male behavior whenever a woman would ask why men do something illogical. Reading that men/boys will identify with the main character in a story only if they are male. If the main character is female they will identify with one of the male side characters. Meanwhile girl/women will be able to identify with the main character no matter what. My though was "Bullshit, I always identify with the main character even when they are female." Turns out it is now especially instead of even😂 When I was first going though puberty I felt my chest start getting bigger and it felt wrong somehow. Also I really hated having facial hair. I was to the point where I was consciously avoiding mirrors to avoid having to see myself with facial hair. Gaining weight after COVID and having some of it go to my chest. I thought it was kinda like having boobs, and it made me want to have actual boobs. This one really should have tipped me off sooner, but I can be really dense sometimes. Also one NSFW thing that really should have tipped me off sooner, and probably would have it I had known what being trans was at the time: When I was 13 and horny, I was reading some manga that I really was not supposed to be reading for another 5 years, I can across a depiction of some trans adjacent women and I had the casual thought of wanting to be like that.

[@afss5558]

your videos are helping me so much with giving me information that I need and gain the courage to begin the transition and tell everybody what I truly am. Sometimes I dont accept myself and you are being so much important to me

[@TheRealJellyBomb]

I'm a prostitute. I'm currently transitioning to female. I'm also fat (322 pounds, 5 ft. 1). I don't know if there's something wrong with me, but I enjoy my customers finishing on my face. Maybe it's my self hatred. Maybe it's just the woman in me, that I'm hoping to get out. Hopefully the transition will make me hate myself less. I don't know where I belong. I need some kind of base... One thing I know, I'm not a man, I'm a woman, no matter what anyone says. Science is just some right wing misogynistic patriarchal tool to keep me and my fellow prostitutes down.

[@snoopdog6793]

You look amazing. I came out to my wife the other day as trans woman. She is going to stay with me and support me.

[@spacebunsarah]

omg I’m so happy for you! it’s such an amazing journey and I’m glad you’re taking it and being supported along the way.

[@matildastanford7019]

I'm happy for you, I had a similar experience coming out to my (now ex-) wife who actually encouraged and helped me to start transitioning. In my case we also had 3 children which added a whole lot more complications to the situation. I don't know if that is a factor with your relationship. I really think that you need to be aware that, over time, as you change so will your wife and there is a real possibility of separation. My wife and myself never dreamed for a second that it would end like it did, we communicated well and still, on a personal level care for each other. But now I am completely estranged from my kids who have developed difficulty, personally, socially and mentally, to accept and come to terms with that their "Dad" is no longer their Dad. They were accepting, even excited and happier for the first few years of my transition, but now they don't want me around them. I'll always love them, they do know that, sometimes it doesn't go the way you think. I truly hope your experience is different. xx

[@morbidmanuscript9324]

Congratulations !

[@Sanity98]

I've recently began thinking about my dysphoria, this video helps me a ton ☺️

[@Crowdraws_]

Hey ya’ll - practical advice for libido adjustment. If you want certain parts to stay functional, be sure to exercise them fairly often so that your primary sex hormone becomes estrogen instead of testosterone. Your libido may change but the functionality should remain pretty similar.

[@Maelle-Liraz]

Thank you for touching on the subject of the difficulty that our loved ones go through when we transition … there is a mourning phase that our friends and family experience. They see the loss and not the gain unfortunately…

[@joshhoehne8281]

You are my muse for my transition. Thank you for being you!

[@morbidmanuscript9324]

Wishing you the best of luck

[@TheRealJellyBomb]

I'm a prostitute. I'm currently transitioning to female. I'm also fat (322 pounds, 5 ft. 1). I don't know if there's something wrong with me, but I enjoy my customers finishing on my face. Maybe it's my self hatred. Maybe it's just the woman in me, that I'm hoping to get out. Hopefully the transition will make me hate myself less. I don't know where I belong. I need some kind of base... One thing I know, I'm not a man, I'm a woman, no matter what anyone says. Science is just some right wing misogynistic patriarchal tool to keep me and my fellow prostitutes down.

[@GlorianaCherubini]

Thank You, I'm almost 5 months on hormones and I feel Great

[@TheRealJellyBomb]

I'm a prostitute. I'm currently transitioning to female. I'm also fat (322 pounds, 5 ft. 1). I don't know if there's something wrong with me, but I enjoy my customers finishing on my face. Maybe it's my self hatred. Maybe it's just the woman in me, that I'm hoping to get out. Hopefully the transition will make me hate myself less. I don't know where I belong. I need some kind of base... One thing I know, I'm not a man, I'm a woman, no matter what anyone says. Science is just some right wing misogynistic patriarchal tool to keep me and my fellow prostitutes down.

[@garlic56]

5 months on HRT LITTERALY MY LIBIDO IS ON THE TOP OF THE WORLD HELP-

[@hunter123711]

It's super expensive but it's worth it. I felt cramps on hrt almost like on a monthly basis almost like a period and my boobs and shoulders hurt so badly. 😩 but I love my transition. U Said all true stuff girl. My emotions were non existent b4 hrt but now I cry over everything.

[@saikorave738]

Hehehe no one, never will look on u like on women. Only med corpo Has client to the end.

[@beanj580]

I'm not being unkind, but you're cramping must have been a GI issue. I'm sure you don't need a lesson on what causes bio women cramping during their cycle.

[@hunter123711]

I'm just stating I had cramping 😩

[@tommychappell6359]

I'm sure your gorgeous woman 😊😊

[@raz8676]

@@hunter123711 🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@Nelsea7190]

a good thing about the old wardrobe is that you can keep it for 10yrs or more and still be ok to wear it... i bought a modest set of alternate clothing and that cost did surprise me. im exploring my self these past 10months and its hard on my mom to hear of my choices.

[@BeccaBecca71]

I have no reason to keep my boy clothes Not for 10 yrs not for 1 yr My local Thrift stores have great selections. I've been dressing androgynous from 2015 from ladies section

[@aquestforthetruth1653]

I don’t know who’s been spreading this misinformation to you but yeah you are a supermodel! Not joking.

[@TheRealJellyBomb]

I'm a prostitute. I'm currently transitioning to female. I'm also fat (322 pounds, 5 ft. 1). I don't know if there's something wrong with me, but I enjoy my customers finishing on my face. Maybe it's my self hatred. Maybe it's just the woman in me, that I'm hoping to get out. Hopefully the transition will make me hate myself less. I don't know where I belong. I need some kind of base... One thing I know, I'm not a man, I'm a woman, no matter what anyone says. Science is just some right wing misogynistic patriarchal tool to keep me and my fellow prostitutes down.

[@FateBoost]

Oh the makeup part got me. I didn’t know a 30ml bottle of foundation for £15 of a cheap ish brand is full size! I genuinely thought it was a sample and got sticker shock

[@DeAnnaParisRN]

Makeup is not what makes one female.

[@gamingwithhui4707]

im swedish too and ive been struggling to find swedish trans female youtubers so im very glad i found you. i didnt understand i was trans until a few months ago but ive always felt uncomfortable in my male body so once i came to terms with my gender identity it all starting making sense to me. are all the waiting times for getting help and hrt and all that really as long in sweden as ive heard?

[@calypsotorn]

how can you say you don’t look like a victoria secret model?!?! GURL you look BETTER- HOWWWW-

[@StephenSzolosi]

Hi Mat (from Sweden???!!!) Thanks for being so raw and honest and yourself! You have nooo idea how helpful this particular video has been for me! :)

[@hadhad129]

Yeah all the Cost of women's clothing is so expensive everything makeup, accessories, bags, and long hair products too

[@Diablo_Himself]

Thank you for putting this information out into the ether... People NEED to know this stuff!

[@Diablo_Himself]

Some VPNs were hacked recently. Be careful people!

[@obnoxious_atheist]

I ended up looking like my Mom with HRT, lol. Which isn't such a bad thing.

[@gone_mad-tryagainlater]

I look kinda like my mom and im not even out yet

[@TheRealJellyBomb]

I'm a prostitute. I'm currently transitioning to female. I'm also fat (322 pounds, 5 ft. 1). I don't know if there's something wrong with me, but I enjoy my customers finishing on my face. Maybe it's my self hatred. Maybe it's just the woman in me, that I'm hoping to get out. Hopefully the transition will make me hate myself less. I don't know where I belong. I need some kind of base... One thing I know, I'm not a man, I'm a woman, no matter what anyone says. Science is just some right wing misogynistic patriarchal tool to keep me and my fellow prostitutes down.

[@deannab3448]

i had the same issue with friends and still do. I decided to forgo the friends deal and gave the lot a choice. accept me , or be on your way. i have 1 friend left. Does it sadden me? meh, not really. Be ause others who judge me for their well being are just not people i want in my life. Love the vids ms. matilda you look healthy and well hope you keep the good health.

[@JIMBEAMM]

Wow! A sneak attack! Wasn’t expecting to see another great video nearly so soon. Love your jumper. A bit of colour suits you Mathilda. Have a lovely day 😊

[@TheRealJellyBomb]

I'm a prostitute. I'm currently transitioning to female. I'm also fat (322 pounds, 5 ft. 1). I don't know if there's something wrong with me, but I enjoy my customers finishing on my face. Maybe it's my self hatred. Maybe it's just the woman in me, that I'm hoping to get out. Hopefully the transition will make me hate myself less. I don't know where I belong. I need some kind of base... One thing I know, I'm not a man, I'm a woman, no matter what anyone says. Science is just some right wing misogynistic patriarchal tool to keep me and my fellow prostitutes down. So true

[@royalcreations3970]

Love and Light to you for helping so many here with your videos. Shine on!

[@jerometsowinghuen]

Very unexpected to hear some facts or changes about HRT.

Haha I know right ❤️

[@damien5748]

@ youre stunning beautiful sweetie.❤❤❤❤

[@ChloeGrace-q3i]

I love your channel. I just recently accepted my gender identity as a trans woman. I have always felt something was off, but never could put a finger on it so to speak. I didn’t have the issues of hating my male body or it being a problem in many ways. But just knew deep down something was not right. Something was missing. Last week, 3/15/2024, I chose to accept my gender identity and started coming out as a trans woman. I have a very small group of people that know right now do to the fallout that I know will take place as some friends and family find out. But I refuse to be a female trapped in a males body any longer. Watching your videos as I prepare to start this journey is a game changer. I have my first appointment in 2 weeks or so to discuss going on HRT and I can’t wait. Thanks you for being so open and honest about your experiences and feelings.

[@ch1pnd413]

The pink tax is crazy. Thrift stores are your best friend.

[@sproutingresilience4787]

It is interesting to see the differences everyone experiences on HRT, like myself my emotional range and stability didn’t really change at all, and in terms of smell and sweat i actually sweat more now literally the exact opposite. Also my hair is a bit greasier and a bit thicker. Also my feet have shrunk just a little.

[@sharkbaitshaun9581]

I’m just beginning my MtF transition. I’ve been in a denial about it a very, very long time, but with a lot of support my friends, I finally feel like I’m allowed to try and be myself. A lot of the stuff you said here I related to, and from the dysphoria to my expectations. I’m going to do my best to keep those in line. It’s scary! It’s going to be especially scary when I tell my mother too. She’s not inherently transphobic, but she struggled a lot with the LGBT nature of my siblings, and I fear for the worst. I think this video was a good reminder though, that as focused I am on myself and my own actualization, this is going to affect her to. She’s losing her only son, in a sense, and I’ll be the last one to change my name. I know she’ll always love me, but I also know it’ll be difficult for her too. I really appreciate this video for putting a few things into perspective for me

[@Mel-wn9gb]

Your mother is not losing her son and she knows it. Don't worry.

[@hdrunx4840]

@@Mel-wn9gbshut the fuck up dude, you can tell that these people are being genuine, these are REAL PEOPLE, going through ACTUAL THINGS and you’re just invalidating all this just because you’re transphobic

[@TheRealJellyBomb]

I'm a prostitute. I'm currently transitioning to female. I'm also fat (322 pounds, 5 ft. 1). I don't know if there's something wrong with me, but I enjoy my customers finishing on my face. Maybe it's my self hatred. Maybe it's just the woman in me, that I'm hoping to get out. Hopefully the transition will make me hate myself less. I don't know where I belong. I need some kind of base... One thing I know, I'm not a man, I'm a woman, no matter what anyone says. Science is just some right wing misogynistic patriarchal tool to keep me and my fellow prostitutes down. So true!

[@sophiaw5562]

Thank you Mathilda, so grateful for this video 😊

[@Sirinxbella]

"The people around you are hurting" And they deserve it ngl. My mom still has it in her head that I will return to being her "perfect son"🤮

[@SaraFranklin-z5z]

Hey Matilda. I'm a transgender woman too. On her life's journey

[@MayOrWhatever]

I don’t usually comment things on my second channel, but I decided I will comment something since I watch these type of videos on here. I’m in my younger teenage years, and it absolutely sucks. I’m just waiting and waiting until I’m able to gain access to HRT. Considering I’m relatively apathetic right now, I definitely really want those emotions gained from estrogen. But I’ll have to wait till I’m 18 just to have to wait a while more.

[@TheRealJellyBomb]

I'm a prostitute. I'm currently transitioning to female. I'm also fat (322 pounds, 5 ft. 1). I don't know if there's something wrong with me, but I enjoy my customers finishing on my face. Maybe it's my self hatred. Maybe it's just the woman in me, that I'm hoping to get out. Hopefully the transition will make me hate myself less. I don't know where I belong. I need some kind of base... One thing I know, I'm not a man, I'm a woman, no matter what anyone says. Science is just some right wing misogynistic patriarchal tool to keep me and my fellow prostitutes down.

[@jerryg4688]

Oh my, she is talking about everything I've gone thru or going thru. The first thing I said to the doctor at my first check-up was, "I had no idea how expensive it is to be a woman from scratch "

[@jwenting]

Makeup prices are high because the development cost is high, especially getting everything human rated around the world is a long and very expensive process. And as sales for each of the hundreds of varieties are relatively low, and customers expect a new line every few months, with each product needing individual certification yeah, it gets expensive. Same reason many medications are so expensive. Cost of my new wardrobe: about 4000 Euro spread over several months. Big money, but needed to replace everything anyway as I was losing a LOT of weight due to new medication and change in diet (which was a good thing, not a bad thing, I was morbidly obese for years) and decided to start out new with all feminine clothes rather than the "male uniform" of jeans and t-shirts I'd been wearing 24/7 for 25 years. And yes, I bought a lot more clothes than I really needed, in part because I didn't know what would look good on me so was experimenting a lot. Salvation army's been very happy with my regular garbage bags full of rarely worn clothes for the last 6 months or so :) Girl, you may not be a VS model, but you look great. Don't let anyone denigrate your looks.

[@yurmabeechaudits3522]

Makeup prices are high because women are gullible enough to pay for it believing they are getting something "new" or "better". Medications usually don't have the "hundreds of varieties" and those sales aren't "relatively low". Insulin is the largest needed med in the world and most diabetics I knew in the 90s had vials and vials of it bc it was properly priced. Now it's price gouged. Makeup is not a survival need or a necessary means to such and therefor is price gouged. A commercial lawn mower and a Harley Davidson cost about the same and are about half the cost of a cheap car. There are as many varieties and colors of those items as make-up. Oddly enough most people will spend avg to above avg on cars and motorcycles but will choose to cheap out on the actual chore item in a lawn mower. The real truth is greed. The greed knows no patriarchal or matriarchal boundaries.

[@01thomasss]

"Horses sweat, Men perspire and Ladies glow..."

[@sofiamn_05]

I love how that thumbnail has become so common in the trans community when talking about these things lol

[@MusicLover-rn9mq]

By the way makeup is only expensive because of the ingredients and the packing , shipping and the brand's name and has nothing to do with the group of people it's targeted at

[@meridethaprilwilliams1872]

I legally got my name name legally changed on September 11,2009. I went to Trenton, New Jersey with IRIS HOUSE LTSR. On it says "F" ask Kim Way, MHT she will tell you the truth. My adopted mother has my Birth Certificate. When I gave it to her she bent for her disgust that she has it. Alison Roy, social worker, can tell you the truth. She was in the room when I handed it to her. Please, do your research first.

[@WestAustralianadventures]

i stated my MTF transition back in Oct 2021 and HRT back in Jan last year and just wanted to say I really love your videos and channel

[@TheRealJellyBomb]

I'm a prostitute. I'm currently transitioning to female. I'm also fat (322 pounds, 5 ft. 1). I don't know if there's something wrong with me, but I enjoy my customers finishing on my face. Maybe it's my self hatred. Maybe it's just the woman in me, that I'm hoping to get out. Hopefully the transition will make me hate myself less. I don't know where I belong. I need some kind of base... One thing I know, I'm not a man, I'm a woman, no matter what anyone says. Science is just some right wing misogynistic patriarchal tool to keep me and my fellow prostitutes down. For real.

[@ericborgen7311]

It's always going to be expensive to have to buy a whole new wardrobe and replace everything you wear the underwear is more expensive I am glad you are happier now that you are a beautiful woman now

[@alexdawson9379]

So the new essential features after taking hormons is: redistribution of body fat, reduction of muscles, breast growth? How about less body hair, shrinking of the genitals? How long did it take to fully transition?

[@finalsignal1290]

scents def happened to me too. I even started smelling guys more...easier? I guess I can say like guys just smelled more different. im a transwoman and I noticed tht. and im probably one of the transgenders tht actually switched sexuality I leaned towards females all my life being bi forever. then now im like hmm...I kinda like guys A LOT lol

[@_Martine_]

I know I was flirting with a guy, I just liked being around him hahaha and he is not.cute at all.

[@teresaravenshaw5477]

@finalsignal1290 The term isn't "transgenders", that's actually considered rather offensive, "transgender person" or "trans person" would be fine. You can also insert "woman" or "man" in place of "person" if you know the gender of the individual trans person in question.

[@fauxPainting]

Sweet Mathilda you are awesome...Stay safe and warm... I wish you the best 👌

[@fae_queen6788]

Yesss how did u finally cope with the bigger mood swings I'm dealing with it now I have been on hrt since july

[@underthebluetakemein.]

"This is my channel and I am DRAMATIC" OMG, I love that !!!💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💖

[@josephbelisle5792]

Thank you for another great video. I had a friend who was trans. This was decades ago. Before I knew I was. I knew he was holding a secret. When he came out as trans he was so worried about what people would think. I just gave him a big hug a told him i supported him being who he is. Which is a woman. What does it cost anyone to love ohers for who they are? What does it cost to not love them because of societal or religious beliefs? There really is no choice.

[@alicetruelovecrossdresser9670]

You look stunning today! Thank you for sharing your life ❤😊🌹

[@TheRealJellyBomb]

I'm a prostitute. I'm currently transitioning to female. I'm also fat (322 pounds, 5 ft. 1). I don't know if there's something wrong with me, but I enjoy my customers finishing on my face. Maybe it's my self hatred. Maybe it's just the woman in me, that I'm hoping to get out. Hopefully the transition will make me hate myself less. I don't know where I belong. I need some kind of base... One thing I know, I'm not a man, I'm a woman, no matter what anyone says. Science is just some right wing misogynistic patriarchal tool to keep me and my fellow prostitutes down. But I digress....

[@SmilingGlacier-qp1xf]

When I started on hrt I was already very feminine my mom help me a lot I I learned how to cook clean do laundry and be a house wife I dated my husband for 1 year before I had sex with him it was the best thing I did

[@Victoria-sx4mp]

Gosh! it´s insane how much make up costs in sweden; I´m a Mexican trans girl ands in my country i can cost my make up and changing my wardrobe with 19 years old. I stared at 17 years old and from the start i buy my own stuff. In Mexico we have freeair markets we call Tianguis "t-an-geese" *laughs* and well, yeah you can purchase lipstics for half of a dollar and also the clothes are cheap, like there are some salers who resale the clothes the buy to the stores like H&M when tey change their inventory and they resale it at the 50% of the price on the tag, cause yeah it is all new clothings. Anyways... living in Mexico s not how they show on the movies

[@alicetruelovecrossdresser9670]

So as China, the cost of crossdressing is very cheap

[@Victoria-sx4mp]

@@alicetruelovecrossdresser9670 weeeell we´re tlaking about CHINA they make everything! i think that 95% or more than i have is made in china. That´s crazy; it should be really cheap to buy clothes and make up

[@KeritechElectronics]

Wardrobe, makeup - well, do small steps and take it from there. For me it was rather easy as I had some clothes and shoes from my pre-24/7 times and then bought a thing here and there, no dramatic 180 degree turns. As for makeup, I wear it to concerts, parties or as a means of creative expression - otherwise I'm too exhausted to do it everyday. Emotional states - it's absolutely true and it's partly because you allow yourself to express more, but also because of the changes estradiol does to brain functioning. Sweat and libido - also noticed. Nice change, I like it, even though I had no libido back then. Being a completely new person - I don't know where this myth comes from, but it's definitely a misconception. Estradiol doesn't erase your mind - the memories will be there, the experience and knowledge too, and old habits will stick as long as they're not worked through. To think that HRT or (even more so) bottom surgery will completely change you is misunderstanding of how things work. Transitioning is a big change to someone's life in different aspects, both personal, family, professional, religious, social, etc. It's often done in hostile contexts, with lots of resistance to overcome and uninformed people to educate. Not an easy thing, but way better than living your life as someone you've never really been. At some point it gets to you and you make the decision.

[@gwendolinegoetz9224]

When going full-time, I already have a full wardrobe (some said that it is based on Tardis technology). I agree that it took me decades to have a such wardrobe. Regarding mood swings and emotions, it is really related to the HRT. I don't experience this with my HRT for menopaused woman that I am. As you mention, HRT is also a libido killer for me, but this is not always the case. After my prostate removal, some libido came back as well as some other psychological changes (boring). The most important is taking care of the others. I didn't transition, but I let my family, my colleagues, and others do their transition. I always consider what my wife prefers as outfit in order to make her comfortable.

[@TheRealJellyBomb]

I'm a prostitute. I'm currently transitioning to female. I'm also fat (322 pounds, 5 ft. 1). I don't know if there's something wrong with me, but I enjoy my customers finishing on my face. Maybe it's my self hatred. Maybe it's just the woman in me, that I'm hoping to get out. Hopefully the transition will make me hate myself less. I don't know where I belong. I need some kind of base... One thing I know, I'm not a man, I'm a woman, no matter what anyone says. Science is just some right wing misogynistic patriarchal tool to keep me and my fellow prostitutes down. Wel...

[@mariomicallef7142]

Mathilda, you speak very good English.

[@messyvignette4764]

I love your top! Came out just 1 week ago and my partner has totally embraced me wearing all the clothes & makeup I’ve been buying in the last month. 😅 💸

[@liamodonovan6610]

Cute top matilda you are such an amazing powerful woman you are sweetheart how could anyone not love you as the woman you are you are such a lovable person you have no reason to be guilty i would love to be friends with you would be a valuable friend to have

[@TheRealJellyBomb]

I'm a prostitute. I'm currently transitioning to female. I'm also fat (322 pounds, 5 ft. 1). I don't know if there's something wrong with me, but I enjoy my customers finishing on my face. Maybe it's my self hatred. Maybe it's just the woman in me, that I'm hoping to get out. Hopefully the transition will make me hate myself less. I don't know where I belong. I need some kind of base... One thing I know, I'm not a man, I'm a woman, no matter what anyone says. Science is just some right wing misogynistic patriarchal tool to keep me and my fellow prostitutes down. We'll....

[@margaretcoons7997]

Omg the wardrobe cost!! It was so much more expensive than I thought it would be

[@DeAnnaParisRN]

Clothes isn’t what makes me female.

[@kenziestoneman7141]

I finally saw the comment box and I wanted to tell you I love you sweater and I also have noticed that my Labido has done the same plus my sweat has changed and as far as Victoria Secret you are a beautiful woman and I would consider you a Victoria Secret model!!!! Love Ya SiS 😘 💗

[@TheRealJellyBomb]

I'm a prostitute. I'm currently transitioning to female. I'm also fat (322 pounds, 5 ft. 1). I don't know if there's something wrong with me, but I enjoy my customers finishing on my face. Maybe it's my self hatred. Maybe it's just the woman in me, that I'm hoping to get out. Hopefully the transition will make me hate myself less. I don't know where I belong. I need some kind of base... One thing I know, I'm not a man, I'm a woman, no matter what anyone says. Science is just some right wing misogynistic patriarchal tool to keep me and my fellow prostitutes down. I don't know

[@halfmoonjoker1907]

The amount it hurts other people is the main reason I don't transition. But I really do care about them more than myself so that's that.

[@teresaravenshaw5477]

@halfmoonjoker1907 The only way that approach goes is with the trans person transitioning and regretting not doing it sooner or with them self-terminating. If you are trans, those are ultimately your only "options".

[@grimm516]

Honestly your still got the looks 👌 don't believe otherwise

[@angw3l]

one month of hrt, literally nothing changed except for my breasts and my emotions were dramatically phased, i cry multiple times a day and all i can do is hope that itll get better

[@katiebunny3396]

I love your shirt!

Thank you 💖💖💖

It’s from NA-KD

[@katiebunny3396]

@ thanks I'll check them out! 😊

[@ebonyatropus7367]

The last part is so true...... my wife tries to be outwardly supportive, but she's still very much grieving and for her it's like losing the person she married. My parents are going through a bit of a grieving as well. i just really try to be empathic and know what both our feelings are valid, and show gratitude for her staying with me...... And yeah, I did and to some extent still do have the Victoria Secret fantasy, but let's face it, i came out and transitioned at 40 and won't be getting that with HRT. I'm very lucky that I HAVE experienced a lot of physical changes so far, and there's so much that can also be done with hair, clothes, voice, and makeup, but for changing bone structure, surgeries are also necessary, and the most dramatic changes happen with multiple procedures, which can get really expensive. I'm still looking for ways to fund my FFS though..... I did find affordable clothes and makeup in Canada and Japan, but yeah, in so many places it gets ridiculous. I have no idea what the cost of cosmetics is like in Sweden.

[@juligrlee556]

Gotta love this sparkling young woman

[@dahnyahollier-day4217]

Well I'm definitely a very different person, in terms of who I am, not what. I went from being a depressed asshole, to a vegan woman who gets upset if they even make someone less happy. And recently, stopped seeing old me as often in mirrors, reflections, and yeah, its frecking weird but great! :D

[@simongronau1]

Very nice video. One comment from me: I hope that no woman with brain would like to look like a Victoria's secrets angel. I hope they would like to look as the beautiful woman they are. 😊

[@riverw4721]

I'm fortunate in that it was through making trans friends that I was able to explore myself enough to figure out my gender, so my whole circle was either trans or an ally. Many people were not surprised by my coming out.

[@Qwaylix]

I’m 19 currently identify as non-binary but AMAB. I am contemplating seeing a doctor and starting hormone therapy to present more fem. I was wondering if it is even worth it at this point to go through the process because I’ve gone through male puberty already. Idk if I’m strong enough to go through the hard work it takes.

[@keyboarddancers7751]

If you have access to the requisite finances, it could be worth talking to a doctor. Otherwise most publicly funded trans gender related health services are very heavily over-subscribed and you'll end up waiting a very, very long time indeed before you actually see anybody. Ain't no trans without the dollar.

[@claygardiner7543]

19 is a perfectly viable age, if you are worried about its worth in terms of possible physical/emotional change alone. Hell, I'm near 50 and practically just started HRT. Wanna talk about blooming late, there are some of us that can weite the book.

[@BellaLickens]

Thank you for posting this video it helped me complete an academic paper I was writing. There are very few sources out there that talk about how transgender people feel while doing HRT.

[@TheRealJellyBomb]

I'm a prostitute. I'm currently transitioning to female. I'm also fat (322 pounds, 5 ft. 1). I don't know if there's something wrong with me, but I enjoy my customers finishing on my face. Maybe it's my self hatred. Maybe it's just the woman in me, that I'm hoping to get out. Hopefully the transition will make me hate myself less. I don't know where I belong. I need some kind of base... One thing I know, I'm not a man, I'm a woman, no matter what anyone says. Science is just some right wing misogynistic patriarchal tool to keep me and my fellow prostitutes down. Me roo

[@justmehere6094]

Makeup is 'expensive' not because of patriarchy, but simple economics. Let' ignore that Cosmetics companies are mostly ran by Women. First, unlike toothpaste which has a potential market of everyone, of every age, Cosmetics have only a segment of the population as potential customers, roughly half, and then only over a certain age. Smaller market, means higher costs. The opposite of "Economy of scale". Next, for a particular product, lipstick, shadows, even foundations, a company has to produce many variations (shades or colors to name some). This costs more, in different supply lines of ingredients, production line complexities and costs, etc. Next, each particular item, lasts for some time with each consumer, thus a particular consumer isn't buying a new passion plum lipstick that often, EVEN IF, that was the only shade that person used (which generally is not the case, and thus increases this time even more for any particular consumer between purchases of product A. Last, any particular consumer, not only most likely buys more than one particular function item (i.e. more than one lipstick) for some products, but, they will buy a plethora of different products. Each individual product may, or really may not be that expensive (see above), but when the consumer needs foundation, plus lip liner, plus lip stick, etc. etc. not only does it add up in reality, but the PERCEPTION is even worse. The exception to the above is Skin care products (though historically, the portion of the population being restricted has been true, though i changing). Their cost comes down to Supply and Demand. If demand is high, as it is for skin care, products, then they will charge more for the product.

[@philiphanan1493]

My wardrobe will never change seeing as I mainly wear Feminine looking Men’s clothes, masculine looking Womenswear, unisex shoes, two pairs of Women’s shoes, and wear corrective makeup. I also have been experiencing emotional changes lately due to being an Intersex Male with Hyperestrogenism. For me, it’s like taking 1/3 of a dose of HRT every day.

[@ericherrera39]

Mathilda you r absolutely gorgeous

[@ExceptionalOneStandAlone]

She really is, she's beautiful

[@JIMBEAMM]

Agreed,she’s a good looking bird.

[@CrowsCrimeSceneCleanUp74427]

Thank you for the video. Very insightful.😊

[@jastisfiagstist]

Mathilda , you are so pretty 🥰🥰🥰🥰💗💗💗💗💗💗💗

[@donaldmcpadden6651]

I love you, Mathilda! Thank you so much for your confidence, you're amazing!

[@TheRealJellyBomb]

I'm a prostitute. I'm currently transitioning to female. I'm also fat (322 pounds, 5 ft. 1). I don't know if there's something wrong with me, but I enjoy my customers finishing on my face. Maybe it's my self hatred. Maybe it's just the woman in me, that I'm hoping to get out. Hopefully the transition will make me hate myself less. I don't know where I belong. I need some kind of base... One thing I know, I'm not a man, I'm a woman, no matter what anyone says. Science is just some right wing misogynistic patriarchal tool to keep me and my fellow prostitutes down.

[@micah6465]

Idk you look like a Victoria’s Secret model to me 😊

[@bellaroccisano4156]

😂😂😂😂

[@toddjenest3212]

An absolutely amazing, insightful, straightforward, revealing, and educational video. I am a straight male with absolutely no issues with my gender. I came across one of your older videos, and I just suddenly became intrigued because you were so straightforward and honest about your transition. You are an absolutely beautiful person inside and out and I hope that you continue to educate and inspire those around you. Keep doing what you do, girl!!! 🥰

[@Ms.Salima]

Hi ,,You look so beautiful God bless you.. I'm 30 years I have been suffering from Gender desporia since I was 9 years. ..I've been taking hormone since 2015. I would like to do Sex Reassignment from male to female but unfortunately I'm afraid from my family especially from my brothers..I'm arab and Muslim my society doesn't accept that surgery 😔...I live in Arab country 💔 in middle east ... I don't know what can I do with that...I can't even change my legal gender because the law of my country 😒 😪...

[@morbidmanuscript9324]

G-d bless you

[@thelc5492]

After starting HRT I noticed my BO smelled sweeter and more kinda like garlic to me. I’m 2.5 years on and I’ve had people tell me my sweat smells good and it’s weird cuz I feel like my sweat is like an aphrodisiac for sexual partners now. I don’t like it😂

[@flyjosie777]

I am a transgender woman. Girl, didn't you do your homework? Welcome to womanhood!! Did you spect to continue feeling and living like a boy? Being a trans woman is not about a glamorous easy lifestyle. Many of us trans women, go through a lot to live as women. It is hard dealing with all the changes and also getting all the surgeries necessary. I spent 28 days in a hospital in Thailand to have 3 major vaginal surgeries. Social media gives the wrong impression of what a real trans woman goes through. Best of luck to you. Josie