Timesuck Podcast | Skinny Folks Go To Heaven: The Remnant Fellowship Cult

[@Peaches1393]

1. I love your show/comedy so much. I’m glad I got to see you tour before you stopped! 2. I was an active member and worship leader in the ICOC church for about 12 years (age 18-30) I did this program for years. I happen to have a PCOS that causes a lot of things including weight gain when I don’t have proper nutrients. No joke, I didn’t realize until right now how much this program affects me. I hate being full and I’ll wait until my head hurts and I get dizzy to eat. I physically feel sick and guilty when I eat a normal amounts of food or I didn’t “wait for hunger pains”. I could go on for hours but the point is thank you for doing all of this. I left this church under a year ago and I’m unlearning a lot. You helped me wake up to a new thing and I’m excited to get healthier!!

[@CorvusIII_]

Dan's impression of Gwen sounds like Paula Dean's evil twin. 😂

[@ghiajohnson1547]

🤣🤣🤣

[@Alucard65535]

I need to pause this episode so I can go get an oreo royal blizzard.

[@bergstrom716]

Royal with cheese...

[@dawnw9850]

I think I love you 😊

[@OurCelestialAnatomy]

Paused to go get a bacon cheeseburger

[@Wilbot666]

Paused to collect 2 x meatbox and chips at the front door. (Lamb and chilli/Chicken satay).

[@rneercats4574]

I need to pause this episode to go eat an onion bagel

[@smhivehadenough]

LOVE that you covered this skeletal woman! was hoping there’d be a timesuck for my last hour of work & triple M heard my prayers 😭

[@smhivehadenough]

@DonnellOkafor-pd7ynclearly you have no taste move along

[@ghiajohnson1547]

Skeletal indeed😳😱🤦‍♀️!

[@ghiajohnson1547]

⁠🤣🤣🤣

[@NoToAllOfThat]

Thanks for keeping me company and making me laugh while I’m getting through my work day

[@jonathanulrich4905]

I constantly snacked while listening

[@Shatterspeed]

Reminder to "provoke not your child to wrath" ✨️ That's my immediate follow-up to the toxic people who love to throw around "honor thy mother and father," ESPECIALLY when it's an adult child who is well within their own rights to make decisions for themselves

[@cdorst2286]

Such a crazy story! Can’t wait to hear your spin. Hail Nimrod

[@capedoctor]

Here every Monday. Some would say that's Cult : )

[@reneelefayz4403]

I ate a bbq chicken sammy, fried pickles and nanna puddin' while streaming this. I feel oddly amused and conflicted simultaneously.

[@hi4that2]

Friendly reminder that all bodies are summer bodies 😋💌 glory be to Lucifina 🙌

[@slipperypetesmeat]

{LARD DETECTED}

[@reign5563]

Just don't

[@Clyde-S-Wilcox]

Cult! Cult! Cult!

[@Minty1313]

The irony for someone that was so obsessed with the scales is that I believe the plane they were flying in was overweight!

[@Nonameforyoudangit]

NTSB determined the crash was due to pilot (her hubs - Joe Lara) error.

[@crissaacrookss]

Please, for the love of Lucafina make a douche bag Jesus tshirt. Especially a low cut racerback tank for women 47:05 😅

[@DeconvertedMan]

why the bleep did I decide to play this ep when I have to be on an all liquid diet?! DAMN YOU CUMMINS.

[@folsomjustin]

Grandma on my dad's side tried this on my brother and I when we were little, Grandma on mom's side decided the only way to combat this was extreme opposite. I still don't think I have digested everything yet

[@jashwaalancummings3321]

ANITA PILLOW. DID HE JUST WALK BY THAT. I NEED A PILLOW 😂😂😂😂

[@kennethmullen-qe9hg]

Calm down... Nobody needs a pillow so badly they scream for it... (Except MAYBE those at thirty thousand feet, up in airplanes...Or those nose-diving towards the earth and shallow water, at six hundred miles an hour, Lmfao!)

[@jashwaalancummings3321]

I just heard that name and couldn't let it go. Need a pillow to cry on because he didn't make a joke about it

[@Jryan95]

Member of a church of Christ here. The idea is that the governing doctrines and core beliefs come from the Bible alone. Different locations share the name to signify that each church should practice strict-Biblical teachings.

[@benalexander1754]

And International Church of Christ is quite different. He didn't do much research in this area. Feels like he needed to pad the episode.

[@Packers4Evar12]

I have a feeling this won't be the last episode we here the Tarzan cry

[@MartianPlanetArt]

Petition to change the name from the Church of Christ to the Church of the Chancla 🩴🩴

[@youthgirl0821]

I go to one but I can party with that idea 😂

[@micahphoenix151]

Oh shit, this made me wheeze laugh! Thank you, Dan!

[@bskinner22rianna]

Man, this episode made me hungry

[@HendrikssonYames]

Please do an exposé on the Resnicks and how they devour water and how their practices are detrimental to human life.

[@ghiajohnson1547]

This story cracks me up! My fat sinning ass is going straight to hell🤣🤣🤣!

[@Shatterspeed]

I started this episode one day while eating Chicken Salad Chick (with a cookie, gosh dang) and I'm finishing it another day after eating pizza and chocolate! Kiss my grits, Gwen!

[@stevied5459]

Many podcasts have come and gone in the past few years, I’ll stop watching for some reason or another, but time suck has stayed a constant. I will always watch every single week. Love you Dan, please come to Baltimore.

[@ProdigalSonMatt]

The “holy water” is preworkout and you must do 20 burpees before confession.

[@Clyde-S-Wilcox]

"Take this creatine, it us my body"

[@meemawstanley]

I love the long ones!!😮

[@SpicyHousewifeWitch]

I'm currently making my famous to my family, fat girl mac and cheese

[@ghiajohnson1547]

Oooooh, I’m intrigued 😋😋😋

[@NokiOfAzeroth]

You fuckin rock for saying that there is more than just eat less and lose weight for fat loss!!!! More people need to learn this! I have PCOS and am on anti-depressants and so thus, I'm one fat hell-bound bitch :D Love you Dan! Cult, Cult, Cult!

[@kaseybartholomew1819]

Thanks!

[@aubreygranzen7155]

I need a podcast where Dan speaks in a country lady accent the whole time 😂😂 1:06:39

[@Christineeee__hg7yf]

I thought this sounded familiar... My mom followed this "trend." She had bible verses on the pantry doors. Unsurprisingly, it triggered my sister to have severe anorexia and my mom calls me fat (size 8) a lot STILL, even on my wedding dress appointment.

[@jamescollins9211]

We need a TIMESUCK soundboard. It has to have the Tarzan yell, to hell with the devil, dead giveaway, wipple, and much much more

[@jamesideloach2086]

Hey Sir Sucks-a-lot. It's Percy Priest Lake. Oddly enough the plane crashed a mile from my house in Smyrna TN.

[@donnalizer7211]

but calling it a church and not a weight-loss program, she doesn't have to pay taxes.

[@alanreta9233]

I don't even remember what this episode was about. All I remember is Tarzan scream. It only got funnier after the 10th time

[@joebonnett2925]

I'm disgusted with my truffle shuffle body not allowing me into heaven 😅 I'm a slave to biscuits and gravy!

[@Youallsvck]

1:35:33 I believe in disciplining (not abusing) your kids both verbally and physically but oh my heck a GLUE STICK?!

[@honeybee6154]

😁 I just pigged 🐖 out on pea pods & cream cheese. And fresh shrimp with cocktail sauce. 🍤 And tons of water. 🌊 I gotta lay down to listen, I'm so full. Keto is obviously the 🗝️ to Heaven!

[@FLATearthGARY]

Man! Joe being the pilot was the icing on the cake! ….Karma is a real bitch 🤘🏻🤪🖕🏼

[@alanreta9233]

The first line made me laugh like a maniac

[@ghiajohnson1547]

Same🤣🤣🤣

[@ashleyhowie7611]

My dog did go crazy at the Tarzan yell 😂

[@Voltaire333]

Oh no ! Pre baby me could of went to heaven 😂

[@The_Typical_American]

Higher the hair the closer to god or something

[@engelsflugel]

🤔 I can’t remember, have you done a suck on the Pearls and their “How to train up a child” philosophies. Their other teachings aren’t good either, but the part in this about “raising” children made me think of them.

[@dawoowoo01]

Me looking for a clip of the “Royal Wedding” 😂

[@Nonameforyoudangit]

It's horrifying. You won't be disappointed.

[@shaneranaekelley9543]

Catching up on my Timesuck, Dan gave me hunger pains from Lucifina once he started describing his sinful breakfast. Could eat a mountain of pancakes and pork sausage links right not. I did watch the documentary for this human and their disciples and I love how Dan can always find details that aren't in the other doc's.

[@johnhammond9962]

She's tougher on overweight people than Tony Perkiss.

[@ghiajohnson1547]

🤣🤣🤣

[@pitangawang]

That baby roasting rant got me craving some banana pudding

[@Christopher_Roa]

From what i understand most if not all of these laws were meant to be followed by the 12 tribes of isreal. Judean and old testament laws for isreal of ancient times. The new testament actually speaks on jesus demolishing/fullfilling the laws because in a real sense it was and is impossible to follow these things to the letter.

[@Clyde-S-Wilcox]

Yeah the ignorance of people who don't understand Christianity's belief that Jesus represents the fulfillment of the law and that the Hebrew ceremonial law is no longer in force.

[@joemamma416]

Doesn't Jesus say in Matthew 5 that every bit of the law must be followed to be allowed in the kingdom of heaven.

[@joemamma416]

Matthew 5 17 and 18. He was a practicing jew who abided by all Jewish law and expects you to do so also. No more sausage gravy or you can worship Thor and eat whatever you want.

[@kennethmullen-qe9hg]

​@@joemamma416 Thor did have a magical hammer, though... What did Jesus have? Magical fishing nets. Magical wine casks. Magical hands... Was Jesus the one that Rush song was about? Okay...I guess it was a bit of a toss up! LmMFaO!!! ;) :P :o)

[@Clyde-S-Wilcox]

@@joemamma416 Your ignorance is staggering.

[@michellebates2325]

Crumbl Cookies goes well with this episode! 😂

[@alainasoulliere5230]

I actually was on a trip to Tennessee to see some family and happened to swim in the lake they crashed in while they were still looking for the bodies……. Always was curious about the whole situation and freaked out when I made the connection this was the exact cult.

[@frankyquilavafireblast895]

All right now to put this delicious lasagna into the microwave to reheat. All I grab a can of Pepsi. Oh, didn’t see you there. Freaking Wackadoodle.

[@zackbourgault6073]

Anyone else call the number from the count commercial? Figured something beside a life alert add

[@tephlon-wrap7185]

Gwen looked like the zombie from return of the living dead who explains why zombies eat brains

[@tanjabuchholz5314]

I can't get over how easily awful people like Gwen can become obscenely wealthy meanwhile really kind gentle hardworking people often don't have the basics in life. Its so messed up

[@DM-kl4em]

Yes! People like Gwen Shamblin also get rich at the expense of many kind, gentle, hardworking people. There are a lot of hardworking, well-meaning Christians who diligently "tithe", which means giving 10 percent of their income to the church. Their preacher tells them they are ROBBING GOD if they don't tithe. The most insidious preachers will even insist that you tithe on 10 percent of your GROSS INCOME (before taxes). As a result, many well-meaning Christians in the church live paycheck-to-paycheck. They see it as a sacrifice, thinking their money is going to help the poor. Meanwhile, their preacher drives a luxury car, lives in a multimillion dollar mansion, and often has a private jet too.

[@teresakaczynski8780]

Curious to know God’s opinion on Aqua Net

[@codyworlds6372]

Your accent in this sounds like listening to Ken Burns talk about the civil war on acid.

[@JeremyAbear]

MORE SPANISH BON JOVI

[@abbysteranko474]

Can you please do the disgusting and terrific high school mass shooting case of Ethan Crumbley? And the Mcmarthin preschool cases? Please, I will completely understand if they're too busy this case deserve justin, please, and thank you.

[@MrSpiceman808]

Al Bundy was an American hero. He scored 4 touchdowns in one game for polk high school!

[@LiamLivesOn]

Maybe God gave my grandad terminal cancer so he would become skinny and get into heaven, thank you God and Gwen for showing me the light.

[@jeanoch8125]

I just ate a ice cream sandwich lol

[@DeconvertedMan]

*cult cult cult*

[@youthgirl0821]

I have attended & still do a church of Christ. The accuracy of comparison to a KFC! 😂 The International CoC is considered a cult within the CoC. All of the CoC colleges had a ban for a while on accepting any students who were involved with the ICoC. (It has change within the last 15 yrs). You know the typical: you can’t date outside the member’s in the ICoC, you will be shunned if you miss a certain number of services, not tithe enough or sleep with someone & so on. Us normal CoC don’t do any of that.. we just have the typical asshole old lady who wants to know your “prayer request” because of gossip purposes or tell you that your clothes look awful. I have seen some folks leave if there’s change for the better. My ex & ex best friend convinced each other that I attend a cult. It’s not.. far from or at least my congregation. My ex went to a church that used to “dress up as Arab’s & speak in tongues” every service but that’s normal but not attending a church that doesn’t have a band for worship (which some are slowly adapting to bringing in a band). Maybe it’s me growing up in the South 😅 maybe it’s that my church is trying to change for the better (we have a trans man as a deacon & youth workers..myself included are welcoming & understanding to any student who thinks they are in the lgbtq+ community). Imagine like the middle child who is an introvert with their main character moment but church 😅😂

[@billzusner4873]

Jon Stewart level sarcasm aside...most of the healthiest and longest lived cultures in the world utilize most of these ideas (sin the god stuff). Turning food to fuel is hard on the body and uses a lot of cell regen. Just an aside.

[@BlueEyesWhiteDragon]

1:55:05

[@nabrog2674]

Weeeeeeeeeee!!!

[@yickyhite1725]

Fart

[@kennethmullen-qe9hg]

Blast-phemous! Lol!

[@jonathanswieton5850]

1:19:40

[@reign5563]

I'm sorry, but I love it how you will go twice as hard on religion or God or Christians, etc, than you do on killers or pedos lol.

[@Clyde-S-Wilcox]

1:26:30 Jesus Christ man turn it the fuck down.