to the hijabi who gets treated like sh*t...

[@KendallM0219]

I can’t agree with you more. I’m a revert and wear hijab and I can’t even explain how often I wanted to take it off. Not because I didn’t like it. But because people attack me. People see me and make the evilest faces at me, if looks could kill I would’ve been murdered many times. People act like I’m subhuman just because they can’t see my hair. It’s so weird and strange. Men and women fear me. It’s a very alienating way to feel. People question if I speak english. Dude I’m Mexican-American I speak english. I was born and raised here! Do you speak english? Like are you joking. The islamophobia I experienced at school was strangling. I’ve never had someone hate me just because I’m wearing a headscarf. I got the lowest grade in the class because she simply couldn’t take me serious. She asked everyone to write a poem where you choose another poem as a platform. So you include part of the other poem. She asked around the class to tell her what we were using for the poem. I told her “A Shel Silverstein poem” and she laughed in my face and I just stared at her and completed my statement “it was the last thing my mom read before she died of cancer alone in palliative care.” and she turned gray. The entire class was silent and she continued to disrespect me afterwards. Try telling other muslims you aren’t more muslim than them. I hate how people treat me like I’m some outlier stranger. They stop cussing and won’t broach certain subjects just because I’m standing there. I’m no different from you. I’m just as flawed as you are, the scarf doesn’t make me automatically better than you. If anything I’m probably worse than you.

[@Reynacampbell]

This…..resonated so deeply with me. For me the hardest part is the constant feeling of being underrated, overlooked and ostracized….Thank you so much for sharing. Peace and blessings sis🧡

[@KendallM0219]

@@ReynacampbellPeace and blessings for you too ❤. I don’t want to say I’m happy I’m not alone because no one deserves to be treated like this. Solidarity together ❤

[@wasiladiab9674]

Everything you are saying is exactly where I'm at with hijab. I agree it's the noise from the muslims that upsets me so much more and makes me feel like i dont want to wear it

[@ayeshak6822]

It's not what people think of you. It's what the demons attached to these people think of you. Nothing agitates demons more than practicing Muslims. That's the spiritual power of your faith.

[@YoutubeAnonUser]

That's literally shaitaan whispeing waswass to you. Those people have no control over you. Deep down you just don't want to wear it and you will justify that by blaming the "noise from muslims"...

[@grumpycrumbles7360]

Off topic, but if this is you in your profile pic I wanna say that you have a beautiful family! God bless you 🙏♥️

[@asha3681]

As a hijabi who attended a predominantly white high school in a very white town, I’ve honestly never been in a place where I wasn’t the only one wearing a hijab except when I am around family. Over the last four years of being a hijabi, starting my freshman year I had a huge identity crisis, mostly because I had never faced the kinds of issues like the stears, constantly have my people undermine me as person or act as if though I need to be saved. I felt like I had constantly proved my humanity over and over again. All of this really took a toll on my mental health. In freshman year I had one teacher who was hellbent on portraying the hijab as oppressive and would constantly bring up how, as American women, we’re free compared to women in Saudi Arabia (While starting at me☠️) What really bothers me the most for the longest time, was how uncomfortable and guarded people were around me, just I never would want anyone to feel that way because of me. Over time felt very OUT OF PLACE regardless of having a huge number of friends being well known, and respected in the school it's something I still feel to this day. In my friendships, I remember Sophomore year I had this one friend who starting out would constantly compliment me and if we had a pattern activity she would completely take over and over time not being what she expected me to be, she developed a deep animosity toward me and constantly felt the need to humble me. One particular incident stuck with me was when we (Every student who had this one English teacher) had to write a research paper about oppression happening around the world and had to have a peer read and review it. She wrote about the oppression of hijab and EVEN when I was not her direct english class waited till the class we shared to ask me to read it. But the bad comes the good, honestly I have met beautiful people, and had amazing experience my friends and with teacher as well over the past four years But nevertheless, I learned to understand that the hijab doesn’t define me, that I don’t have to prove anything to anyone, that I am a whole human being not anything less or more. I am in my senior year and ALHAMDULILLAH, I have never experience in my face racism like being called a slur or any getting physical (Something even I am very shocked by but extremely grateful for) considering that the school is very right leaning and know to be very racist in the county. In the past four yeara I have gotten so closer to Allah and I have gained so much confidence and acceptance and joy in life that I had not expected. I have four months till graduation, the hijab I believe is something that adds to me as a person, I developed a very strong sense of self and really don't care much about what others think. Love the video 💗💗

[@khadija_1b]

I had the privilege of growing up where hijabis were a majority so I was comfortable wearing it and confident in who I was. I moved to the west not too long ago and quickly realized that people here will always have a warped perception of us no matter how much we try to be cordial and "represent Islam" as best as we could. I just act oblivious when someone is being passive aggressive or openly rude to me. For my own peace of mind I like to assume that they're having a bad day or can't regulate their emotions rather than them being islamophobic

[@hiramohammed5876]

A few years ago my mom had gone to Pakistan, and when she met up with my Phupi she had said to my mom "Hira looks like she doesn't pray and isn't as good of a Muslim as her younger sister." The only difference between us was hijab. Sure my style was a little more Americanized and I don't wear Desi outfits unless it's a dawat. And she said this to my mom's face who also doesn't wear hijab. My sister would also get a lot more rishtas than me because she wears it and the family wants "a good Muslim bahu." While I don't care it's good riddance, I still felt very dehumanized. On the flip side I did wear it for about 2 years in college. When I had started, a non hijabi friend had commented my photo saying "good job! Don't take it off!" That pissed me the eff off. Also my mom's friend would say to me I wanna suggest you for so and so rishta because you're so beautiful but they want a non hijabi bahu." That also felt very very dehumanizing. Like they see us girls as just products, like car shopping. I realized a lot of Muslims, especially Pakistanis refuse to see us as humans whether it's on the religious side or the complete opposite of that. All that matters is how we're being presented to society. I have other stories from my hijabi and non hijabi life. I definitely saw both sides.

[@smg8048]

What does bahu mean? I'm not from pakistan

[@Silhouette_005]

​@@smg8048 'bahu' means daughter in law .

[@hiramohammed5876]

@ daughter in law

[@mumbilebo5846]

i really hate how relatable these past videos have been,

[@im_rnha]

As someone who converted later in life, I can say that it was mostly the online Muslim community that made me feel really terrible about wearing hijab. Not downplaying how I get treated in public but I expected that. I didn't expect other Muslims to be so critical and add to this feeling that 'I'll never be enough". I had actually been debating on taking it off to "make life easier" but seeing this today really helped remind me that I'm not wearing this for any of the people who try to make me feel a certain way about it. Your jacket is beautiful by the way

[@wasiladiab9674]

@@im_rnha let me just say the comments section is healing me 😭 I appreciate hearing that I'm not the only one feeling this way. If you figure out how to block out the noise let me know lol

[@smg8048]

I'm sorry you went through that. Those ppl online telling you this or that, insulting you about the hijab are doing more harm than good...and tbh i think ppl are way too brave online these days, saying nasty things they would never be able to back up irl. Hope you didn't get hassled by them.

[@baybeebunny1]

The final point was my fav!! I hated when others put me on an instant pedestal just bc I wore hijab. I come from an odd experience. No one in my fam is religious but I wore hijab during 9-12th grade (high school) my own family asked me not to bc I'm sensitive and they worried for me. Ultimately, I decided to take it off right before graduation bc I hated how I wasn't seen, ever. Everything was ohhh bc you're Muslim etc I just wanted to exist. I no longer claim any religion but no hate to anyone who does. Am I happy I wore hijab during those 4 years? Yes I am, I believe it's beautiful and protected me

[@Juuleeq]

needed this ❤ also, we don’t have to always silently take everything in and endure this bullcrap with utmost composure, you gotta stand up for yourself

[@licoricejoe]

Thank u for your content Tazzy Phe 🥳👌❤️. I am a non religious non Muslim person but I love listening to thoughtful people with strong sense of self and strong POV. It helps me feel less lost and confused about my own world. and somehow everything you say is so gd relatable

[@AS-yo2uy]

This is what bothers me the most, hijabi women get hate from everywhere there is no safe space. She has to deal with the patriarchy at home and alot of the times husbands are not putting in their equal share of the house work, only to go to work to be treated like crapy, and then go to the mosque to be judged. I dont wear the hijab but it boils my blood that in 2001 brabra bush is like "oh we are going to afghanistand and iraq to give women equal rights" and then you have muslim women in the west being spit on and attacked because they are a visable minority the absolute hypicocracy to say we are being a white saviour only to do the complete opposite in the west. Then to have eurocentric secular feminists say wearing the hijab is oppressive--so let me get this straight are you going to control what a woman wears now??!! And the audaucity to be very comfortable with EXCLUDING muslim hijabi women from the conversation about their rights and being discriminatory towards muslim women because of the hijab means femenism (white eurocentric secular) has failed and needs to detach from its colonial past -_- sorry for the long rant but thank you for your video xoxo

[@haytoo]

Thanks for the video!! I’m a revert and new hijabi, I was visiting Dubai, UAE and got stared at, but maybe because I’m dark skinned

[@DxMedPhys]

You know a long time ago I wouldn't have even thought about what I would do if I was in a situation where people were drinking, however in academia I've been put in several situations of differing 'severity'. What I realized is that even though it is difficult, not drinking is simply another boundary that people who see you as human should respect. Some people will take this boundary as a personal attack, but that is on them to grow and learn because you are simply not going to gain anything worthwhile for betraying yourself like that. There is a difference between choosing not to be in a drinking environment, whether it is due to religious purposes or other reasons, and harassing people for their choices. And frankly, the second they pressure you for not drinking is when they are being the bigoted and judgemental horrible humans they see you as.

[@cjekdke]

Regardless of context, I find it very strange how comfortable people are with bothering strangers. I didn’t realize how normal it was for people until I started wearing the hijab, very eye opening. The world is a very strange place, and it seems like life is more real when I have my hijab on, looking at life without a filter. You can’t really be deluded by this clown show, people aren’t as liberal/woke/accepting as they claim to be. Every ideology seems to be totalitarian, and if you fit in the lines seem to be blurred, but when we choose to take a step back as women by quitting this rat race and looking at things from outside; you get to realize that most people are hypocrites, and that they suck at pretending not to be in front of a veiled woman.

[@roseyyhues-1494]

11:39 had a muslim friend treat me like crap because of this, she was made uncomfortable by me being practicing. she'd ask things like 'dont you plan to have s*x before marriage??' and provoke me by asking me about certain 'non controversial' subjects like lgbtq etc. in front of others to potentially embarass me. I eventually I ended the friendship over this. They cope with their religious guilt this way: project imagined judgement onto the hijabi. imagined because i's often NOT THERE and it's what THEY FEEL towards THEMSELVES or it stems from family trauma. I hate that we have to deal with this from fellow muslims.

[@saltandpeppers8788]

Yes.

[@lifeastoldbymai]

I really love your video podcast. It’s so refreshing, raw and true. This is definitely something I needed. Even though not every experience applies to me entirely, I have seen Muslim girls do or go through the situations you’ve mentioned. Please continue to make these videos, they are so beneficial. We need the real talk🫶🏿✨

[@malazkarar1171]

Honestly, if people remember Islam when they look at you, or get embarrassed that they are sinning in your presence, I don't see that as dehumanizing at all. If anything, deterring people from haram or evoking remembrance of Allah (even if it comes off in others' discomfort) are free good deeds right in your pocket. Being able to evoke piety in people clearly doesn't have to reflect your own level of eman. With that said, a good deed is a good deed. Also, a believer doesn't sit at a table where wine is. I'm not saying this to be judgy. It's just a forgotten right upon each other as Muslims to enjoin good and forbid evil. May Allah guide us all. On the topic of enjoining good and forbidding evil, wearing a scarf doesn't constitute a hijab. Hijab meets three criterion: - Cover the Awra (depending on school of thought this ranges from everything except hands, face and feet to everything). - The clothes have to be wide enough to conceal the silhouette. - The clothes have to be opaque as not to expose form and complexion beneath.

[@cjekdke]

We wear hijab because Allah said so, not because we want to be activists. It’s tiring having people put you on a pedestal just because you follow one of the many commandments of God.

[@Ll_jfdk]

You’re back?!!!! I watched you years ago! You are literally the OG hippiearab (who I also absolutely love!) xxxx

[@ayeshak6822]

It's not what people think of you. It's what the demons attached to these people think of you. Nothing agitates demons more than practicing Muslims. That's the spiritual power of your faith.

[@mayl6095]

I can 100% relate to what you said about being seen as an idea and not as a humain being once you put the hijab on thank you so much 🙌🏽

[@PurrfectlyPolishedHome]

Also the flicking off your sister 😂that’s so funny. I laughed. As a hijabi, I’ve been there and been spat toward too recently 🙄

[@jannatalkhanizi4693]

I relate so much to this ❤

[@ajam-n3s]

I dont care what anyone else thinks not Muslim or Non-Muslim. I think there's a hadith which states Muslims are known by their dress and behavior so those people who don't want to look "diverse" "religious" or ethnic I don't assume anything about them if they don't say Salaam first I wouldn't know to say Salaam to them 🤷🏾‍♀️

[@huriaiqbal3395]

After you have your child. Enjoy your first. Really! I rushed to be over with motherhood quickly. I hate myself now.

[@huriaiqbal3395]

I love your vids, they help me cope. Please keep making them.

[@meenaakthar]

I loved this video so much. Thank you.

[@huriaiqbal3395]

Ive been a niqaabibsince 11. Im 26 now born and raised in nj. After i got married and went to india to see my in laws, (hyderabad, muslim place for centuries.) they said ehy tou wearing that. Im not going back. No one ever said that to me in Pakistan. I went every summer. Never had that said in the usa, except by my mom and dad. Yeah, you do you. Honestly muslim make muslim lives harder and usually from people who are supposed to support you.

[@frogs4733]

SubhanAllah, I got questioned by my family in Pakistan about why I wore hijab, or whether I was wearing it only in Pakistan hahaha you can't please anyone. Please the Creator and keep it moving 🫶🏽

[@grumpycrumbles7360]

You wore a niqab when you were 11??

[@Rosierose23]

Haven’t finished the video yet but I wanted to say, Tazzy I absolutely love you, I love you for your confidence, your strength, your wisdom, your humour, your faith💕🦋 And to every hijabi, I pray that Allah keeps us steadfast upon our faith, I know it’s not easy, but you’ve got this sweet one!! 💪

[@g_m15]

The old dude is prolly missionary christians apologetic fan.

[@mimo4856]

Just remember Allah (SWT) would not command us women to wear the headscarf and cover our awrah if it wasn't better for us. We may not see or feel 'better' but for sure Allah (SWT) plans and He is the best of planners. So let the arrogant and ignorant continue with their ways...for Allah (SWT) is All-Knowing and He is All-Just.

[@Casualphilosopher-db9gy]

As a Muslim who doesn’t live in the west, the question I have is it really worth living among so much bigotry even if you make a bit more money? Is there no other way to life a normal peaceful life in a Muslim majority country? I get that some Muslims emigrated bc of the war or bc their home countries were poor but second and third generations can come back and live comfortably with their English and western degrees. Maybe not in their country of origin but in some other Muslim majority countries. There are secular Muslim countries where you won’t be enforced by law to practice but a lot of people practice, So there is understanding and no prejudice. I don’t fully understand why you keep living there if it’s so bad or it’s not actually that bad and there are a lot more things to be grateful about in your life in America, I assume. I get that you and immigrants like you are American or British or European culturally bc you were born and raised there but you are also carrying another culture in you. Is it really worth tolerating this? Is there really no path to living in a Muslim majority country? Economy is developing. Quality of life improves. Personally I don’t think I would tolerate such offences so much. Everyone has dignity. The only reason I see for tolerating this is if you are being prosecuted for political reasons and only western countries can ensure your safety. But not everyone is a dissident, activist, Political leader or a journalist. Not everyone needs that type of protection. Most people can live even under economically developed and comfortable authoritarian regime (as horrible as it sounds but most people simply care about their income and comfort of life, as long as they have what they need, they don’t care). Living outside umma does weaken our faith. All I see from second and third generations of Muslims in non-Muslim countries is that they are embarrassed of their faith and their faith has weakened, they don’t understand Islam and do not have interest in learning about it. They become like the non-Muslim majority. It’s inevitable. It’s very hard to keep the faith strong for generations when you are in the minority and are ostracised. It doesn’t work out for most people. Research shows a lot of second and third and forth gen Muslims in non-Muslim countries abandon their faith, marry to non-Muslims or start practicing significantly less. So to expect that they will be soon more Muslims in the west is questionable. Even if the birth rate is higher, children are more a product of another culture and become less connected to Islam. Is it really worth it? I get that to some political freedoms are highly important but most people aren’t like that. Most people are happy as long as they are safe, have work and life economically decent life.

[@adila2442]

It depends on where you live. Now with Trump presidency - school choice being an option...and the courts taking on case on religious schools - Catholic School to be exact. If people had a choice they would prefer to be able to take kids to Catholic or Islamic or Jewish school and get access to same tax dollars as public schools and require to accommodate disability. Muslims realize they must put more investment into educating kids on their faith because society says otherwise.

[@cjekdke]

I know you want to make yourself sound understanding but you cannot understand. What about white muslims? Why would they leave their culture and family behind? By culture I do not mean haram things included. Just because someone is muslim doesn’t mean that they would assimilate easily/practice better in a muslim majority country. Shouldn’t we push for freedom of religion instead of submitting to the west and leaving? Just like your country is your country, my country’s my country, and I’m saying this as a french muslim. Which one would you recommend? Algerians and moroccans are completely different from Indonesians and Malaysians; all different cultures united by religion (and even that just blurry) but still very very very different. So what is the point? You just get looked at as different but in another way, not in regard to your religion now but your race. People have families, this is wishful thinking. I wish life was that easy but it is not.

[@oromochic1993]

I love your content ❤

[@lailakhoshkar126]

I have a privileged experience because I’m from Toronto, but for the most part the advice I’d give to a younger me would be this: so much of whether our experience with hijab is positive/negative comes down to our own perception. I don’t think it’s always reducible to hijab - the same people who have something to say about hijab will often have an equal amount to say to a non-hijabi about something else. (Sometimes I think the issue isn’t even that hijabis aren’t seen as equal human beings, it’s that women more generally aren’t seen as equal human beings.) So focus on your self, your relationship with your Lord, and the relationships you have in which you ARE treated as a human being and valued for who you are. Those relationships probably vastly outweigh the ones in which you are reduced to what you put on your head. I’m not at all diminishing the challenges of wearing hijab - even in Toronto, I’ve dealt with my fair share of discrimination, and it is absolutely real and very hard, but I think it’s worth encouraging young people to put their experiences with people in perspective. It is a choice to focus on the positive or the negative aspects of our experience, and to allow them to define our experience overall. I do want to acknowledge again, though, I live in a place where it is possible for me to have many positive experiences while wearing hijab; I know some others aren’t as fortunate.

[@darquequeen]

I have the trifecta of layers. I wear hijab, I’m black and almost totally blind. Oh, wait, a fourfecta? (Probably not a word) I also walk with a forearm crutch. I worry about physical attacks, and luckily I don’t go out very often. But I’m scared, scared while out and about I’ll get attacked. And I’ll literally never see it coming.

[@cjekdke]

May Allah make things easy for you and May Allah protect you. ❤️

[@PurrfectlyPolishedHome]

I posted a photo on IG publicly once and the backlash I got from “haram police” or even kuffar who are really pretending to be Muslim just leaving hate comments to cause fitnah between Muslims. I just couldn’t take it. 😢I’m sorry you get those comments. Try to avoid reading them. Or maybe have your husband delete negative ones for you before you look at your comments.

[@AdaLovelace-c8n]

imagine being that nasty (the spitters) they clearly hate themselves

[@AdaLovelace-c8n]

this must be an american thing, never seen other muslims judge a hijabi like this in the UK

[@mimo4856]

UK in most parts are a bit more open-minded now

[@mimimoo949]

In uk you get judged for not wearing it well enough, and esp if you take it off for personal reasons

[@delshahid8971]

👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼🫶🏼🫶🏼🫶🏼💯💯💯💯

[@sylvrstone]

[@YoutubeAnonUser]

Hijab is fard. Not wearing it is literally saying "I know better than Allah." Period. And for those that say "I'll wear it when i'm ready" they think Allah (SWT) is their butler and that whenever THEY feel like putting it on is when they will put it on. The correct position should be: we HEAR and we OBEY. Period.

[@cjekdke]

No one argued the opposite. Did you watch the video?

[@YoutubeAnonUser]

@ I’m just leaving that comment there in case someone in the comments DOES argue that point.

[@cjekdke]

@@KZbinAnonUser This black and white approach is not beneficial simply because that is not the way iman works. No one is getting a boost of iman from your comment which is why stating sources directly is more helpful than having a random person share their opinion on the state of your practice of the religion. The entire video is about getting pressure from all sides, including the muslim community. No one is disagreeing with you, we would like you to read the room. You have left multiple comments on this channel trying this blunt approach, not understanding that not everyone is qualified to advise others. Thank you for your comment, but please refrain from harshness, you are not qualified to do this in a gentle way and if you would like to spread the message, please do so without adding your own personal opinion/thoughts. I think it would be more beneficial if you just shared the original sources/verses instead of writing a think piece, as your own personal opinion/delivery could not only take away from the message you would like to spread in good faith but also be off putting, resulting in people not seeing beyond your delivery. Your additional points are not necessary, and you’d agree if your intentions are sincere that stating the truth with sources only would be more pertinent. May Allah bless you for trying to help anyway.

[@YoutubeAnonUser]

@ i’m not reading all that. But it shows you disagree with something in my original comment even though my original comment is 100% true. I am firm in my imaan. So please stop corresponding with me.

[@cjekdke]

@ Arrogance is a major sin, and you, as a person is not above criticism. I recommend you to repent ASAP. You will be questioned about your lack of self reflection. Speaking about religion is not an immunity. Don’t comment publicly if you don’t want people to engage with you at all, there is a notes app you can use to vent to yourself. I stated multiple times that I agree with your comment and it is not the reason why I responded to it. May Allah forgive you or deal with you accordingly on the day of judgement.