Uncover The Truth: Can You Really Be Transparent With Your Partner? (ep. 119)

Uncover The Truth: Can You Really Be Transparent With Your Partner? (EP. 119)
NEW EPISODE of @niceandneatthepodcast available on all streaming platforms‼️
Communication is the #1 issue in any relationship. One example may be, “Talking and trying to convince someone vs. listening and trying to understand someone”. Which falls into the bucket of transparency and that’s what we will be outlining in this episode. How transparent can you be with your partner?
Couples that listen to understand are often more successful.
Fear is a big part of not being transparent with your partner and also judging your partner when they present transparency - This fear comes from, if we dive into what our loved one is saying, we might not like what we learn or find out about our partner. Encouraging growth is tough because it brings change and that requires everyone in the relationship to evolve and evolution isn’t easy.
It’s best to stay curious and not be judgmental of your partner, it’s very tough to achieve but that is a part of the beauty of relationship… doing the tough things TOGETHER.
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Intro song: @xaroc__ - Pledge of Allegiance

[@randyvixamar3072]

. I applaud Omar for being transparent on how he feels. Im a parent of a 9 month old. All I can say It get better with time. Duke and Jalon bought had great points. Another great one. 💯

[@NiceAndNeatThePodcast]

🥃🥃🥃

[@MadisonPettway_]

“Do you ever think we’re doing our partners a disservice by choosing for them?” MAN! Jalon SHINED this episode! He is so emotionally intelligent. Loved Omar’s point about emphasis on friendship too. Spot on

[@4everL0ve]

As a 39 year old married woman who doesn’t have male friends, it’s so refreshing to be a fly on the wall in these conversations. My husband has said many of these things over the years but it’s hard for me to receive it. I become so defensive and personalize a lot of things which makes him shut down. I’m a work in progress & conversations like this helps because I want to be a better wife, daughter, mother and all around better person. Thanks guys 🙏🏾

[@BeautyBrains-bk7ik]

This conversation got tricky , only because there’s no wrong or right ! I’m married and I agree with Jalon and Duke ! I think being able to be transparent with your partner just feels good! You walk around with weightless shoulders.., but then you gotta ask yourself is that a bit selfish! If I tell my partner EVERYTHING, Even men that try to holla at me knowing deep down it can mess with his head just because it feels good to ME to tell him .., but it’s at HIS expense… is that fair ? There is a such thing as oversharing! Like that old folks say” some things are better left unsaid” and you gotta be ok with that ! I myself have been an oversharer simply because I don’t like holding things but the more mature I got I realized.. not everything matters … and that’s ok ! Great convo ! Food for thought

[@EU-iLO]

"We're looking at transparency like its someone prying into your life." WOW man, I am so guilty of that.

[@NiceAndNeatThePodcast]

Learned a lot through that perspective change 🥃🥃🥃

[@apmg924]

Dropping tiny nuggets of information as they occur definitely builds trust.

[@NiceAndNeatThePodcast]

🥃🥃🥃

[@Allieischill]

The topic around 44 minutes was huge. I’ve had several conversations with my partner around transparency and what situations I do want to know about and others that I don’t, but I feel the most important piece that wasn’t touched on much is HOW to actually have that conversation with your partner. You both must seek to understand what they would/wouldn’t want to know and respect their wishes. Otherwise, it definitely feels like that space of transparency is only one sided if my partner is making decisions on what I should or shouldn’t be privy to. It’s up to each of us to be responsible and accountable in the moments our partner does share something we might not “want to hear”, but those conversations ultimately are what have the greatest potential to forge a deeper connection. Really enjoyed this episode y’all!!!

[@NiceAndNeatThePodcast]

🥃🥃🥃

[@tracijones4147]

Omar and Team, thank you for your honesty and vulnerability in general but to share that with your listeners is major. I pray for you, your wife and your daughter and you raise an awesome little human. Everyone has a slightly different experience with parenting, but NONE of it is ever perfect or easy. As long as you keep showing up with love, honesty and respect, you can't go wrong #WINNING

[@NiceAndNeatThePodcast]

🥃🥃🥃

[@BerryOptimystic]

Before I go any further in watching this episode, I want to say that I think it was genius of Jaylon’s friend to do what he did with his wife regarding the topic of a one night stand. Period.

[@JoseRodriguezFrio]

My wife tells me a one nite stand would be dope... she's not a wife

[@BerryOptimystic]

@@JoseRodriguezFrio I do feel you. However, I believe his response was so out of the box and really tuned in with “ok, how can I personally satisfy and turn this into reality without breaking commitment and trust?” … I can bet one thing, their intimacy and communication is on a whole nother level. I believe and assume she spoke from a place of innocence and curiosity and instead of him going down the wrong rabbit hole, he discovered the ultimate solution/role play that took their relationship to new heights. The bar was set with that play.

[@mimimileigh2484]

I hope hope I'd respond this way!

[@JoseRodriguezFrio]

​@BerryOptimystic wrong hole? Assuming she's still not thinking about it... but good luck to that man and her. She'd be single af for the rest of life if everyone thought like me so I'm glad they have each other

[@BerryOptimystic]

@@JoseRodriguezFrio Correct, assuming her desire was met after the surprising and spontaneous gesture. . When Jaylon first brought it up I immediately thought 🥴 that sound like a recipe for disaster. But, the response makes me question and challenge my own thinking process if I get hit with something like that.

[@RavenAdams-iq9se]

I think what Jalon was tryna get at (or at least what I took from it) was do you feel like you can speak freely around your partner (the same way you would with your other friends) or do you have to “remember who you’re talking to” & filter some things or leave some things out & are you ok with that level of transparency or do you want to speak a bit more freely with them? And it felt like that was being misunderstood

[@taniseedwards8551]

‼️‼️ this! I feel like Omar and Duke weren’t grasping the concept lol they couldn’t get pass the feelings and possession part lol

[@ashleythomas6186]

“You missed that wave”🤣😭

[@twonrichpo1126]

Exactly. Lol

[@beu2543]

Duke made several excellent points this episode. I completely agree with there needing to be some level of unknown which directly correlates and causes you to rely on trust. Knowing when to hold em and when to fold em is key in successful relationships. Also, excellent point from O about friendship.

[@RastaMitchVlogs]

Omar is a real rasta mon, bless up yourself king 💪👑

[@noendelaw]

Aye I’m definitely using “decorated past” going forward 😂😂😂

[@NiceAndNeatThePodcast]

It’s yours! Lol 🥃🥃🥃

[@JaNyaJohnson]

This is really good, I never knew men saw transparency how women do and it’s beautiful how you guys unpacked this topic! Thank you Big Bros

[@NiceAndNeatThePodcast]

🥃🥃🥃

[@briankeeferbriankeefer3316]

This is just such a great honest and thought provoking discussion about communication that is done amongst a group of men who are demonstrating how you listen and communicate in a trusted space..appreciate it.

[@NiceAndNeatThePodcast]

🥃🥃🥃

[@1dyce2]

I get Dukes point, not all people or partners want full transparency so it’s about learning your partner, having conversations and understanding what they can handle knowing or prefer not to know. Some people don’t have the capacity for full transparency and thats okay. In general, I do think a great amount of transparency coupled with with unconditional love and respect is a beautiful thing.

[@waynedoe9113]

The analogies used describing levels of transparency was very well articulated 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾

[@taniseedwards8551]

Does anybody else feel like Jalon and Duke were having two different conversations? Lol

[@TiffanyNicholeCatley]

Another great conversation.👌🏾 There are several things you can just observe in others' overtime and address if need be. But intentional withholding shouldn't be a thing in a relationship without valid cause. IE: it's a surprise. Not directly affecting your partner and / or your relationship. Things that affect trust or threaten the relationship.

[@NiceAndNeatThePodcast]

🥃🥃🥃

[@daninikki35]

Integrity is more important than transparency!

[@DestinationDionna]

Omar, I love how you shared this very real emotion and reaction that all parents go through. In so glad you know it’s OK

[@realself3396]

44:06 - I understand exactly what Jalon is saying. I couldn’t talk to my ex about ANYTHING. It would cause tension or an argument. I definitely couldn’t mention if I saw someone at the supermarket. He hated that I watched this podcast. That was a problem for him to.

[@NiceAndNeatThePodcast]

All things to have paid attention to 🥃🥃🥃

[@sherrellcarter6326]

I agree with everything Duke is saying!

[@NiceAndNeatThePodcast]

🥃🥃🥃

[@shirleybollers2434]

From my personal experiences its better to tell me than to hear it from someone else. I will develop more trust to hear it from the source. Hearing it from others cause suspecion and harm to the relationship 😢

[@nonyab916]

Jalon I understand the intention behind what you’re saying in terms of transparency however the need to know every single little thing about your partner can be rooted in control and be abused. I’ve seen guys get upset because their partner didn’t tell them that they saw their mom that day. Then it becomes why didn’t you tell me this thing or that thing because that’s the standard that was set in the relationship. That’s control, not transparency. It’s impossible to share every little detail even in the healthiest of relationships. I agree with Duke, I trust my partner to tell me what’s up and I also trust God. The rest will handle itself.

[@NiceAndNeatThePodcast]

Jalon, was speaking moreso to intentionally withholding information from your partner.

[@siennagrantmitsak8864]

Refreshing to hear all the perspectives in this episode as per usual!

[@twonrichpo1126]

Beautiful convo fellas. Great point by everyone. I resonate more with Duke on this one tho. Very much needed conversation tho.

[@khaleelholmes9489]

I’m only 22min in the vid. I just wanna say. Duke is cooking rn

[@ds98368]

I really hope Omar is in therapy… I have felt the same way and discovered in therapy I was showing early signs of depression. Depression is weird for men. We are feeling things but it doesn’t make sense so we are trying to intellectually solve the emotions but keep finding ourselves failing at it. Depression will just show up full force if you are not intentional with prevention and taking proper action.

[@NiceAndNeatThePodcast]

Thank you for this 🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾🥃🥃🥃

[@jadenwashington8880]

Jalon doesn’t miss 👏🏿👏🏿

[@fredb2517]

🔥🔥🔥 Episode fellas.

[@nenyejudith]

Love this!! So much wisdom shared ❤

[@NiceAndNeatThePodcast]

🥃🥃🥃

[@dennesaaa]

Right on with this one Jalon🥃

[@ditsycp88]

Duke is hilarious 😂😂😂

[@nkisright2588]

I'm loving Duke! The Nigerian is coming out. A Naija boy to his core! JAYLON: Do you believe your bestfriend? DUKE: I believe my partner is my partner. Just like I don't believe my partner is my cousin. 😂 Nigerians we don't play in make believe. My partner is not my bf as must as society tries to have us believe they are.

[@nkisright2588]

It's DUKE deep stare and the I believe my partner is the love of my life...OK ( So Nigerian) His inflections are cracking me up. If you're Nigerian you know!

[@JoseRodriguezFrio]

He speaks like normal men around me do... needs to be normalized

[@RavenAdams-iq9se]

Lol I honestly thought he was kinda being a smart ass right there when he knew damn well what Jalon was saying.

[@grahamukachukwu5069]

O that haircut cold my guy 🥶

[@Paris_at_home]

I think we as humans give too much power to our flesh and to our emotions. We allow our flesh and our emotions to control us instead of the other way around. I do believe it’s very important to be transparent with your partner and you should be able to speak to the person you are married and or in a relationship with about anything in my opinion; however, if my significant other came to me and told me he is having a sexual fantasy about a one night stand and or wanting to act that out, I would definitely want to dig a little deeper into why he is feeling this way. I would not judge him but I would be curious. I think we should all be careful with what our flesh wants. Whoever sows to please their flesh, from the flesh will reap destruction; whoever sows to please the Spirit, from the Spirit will reap eternal life. Galatians 6-8. I appreciate this conversation fellas! 😊

[@DanielBrown101]

that analogy Duke use about bro being sick and asking/telling you not to tell anyone. Question, on the base of Transparency, is it fair to that person or anyone in general to hold a secret/s for you?

[@kaymensah4631]

What if telling her too much can cause harm to the relationship

[@JoseRodriguezFrio]

Ur gonna be hurt when she tells you something

[@NiceAndNeatThePodcast]

That’s the premise of the conversation. Allowing her to have the space to make a decision is important as well. 🥃🥃🥃

[@JrysonTheEditor]

JaLon: great question Omar: great vulnerability Duke: great answer

[@NiceAndNeatThePodcast]

🥃🥃🥃

[@dken1149]

❤️🔥

[@DestinationDionna]

This is the hole you run through 😂😂😂

[@najeegovia]

Is the bsimone episode dropping on KZbin ?

[@jadentalbert8988]

is it on their patreon or something

[@najeegovia]

@@jadentalbert8988 ya it is

[@NiceAndNeatThePodcast]

www.patreon.com/niceandneat?

[@daninikki35]

32 minutes in and Jalon is confusing me! Some information isn’t relevant, doesn’t mean it’s a lack of transparency.

[@consciousluv]

If you have kinky desires and weirdness just stay single, once you are married certain things should not even be a thought period. I agree with the guy in the hat like you figure yourself out before you get married.

[@PurposeLit]

So glad Omar was straight up! Men need more spaces like this ! 🫶🏾

[@NiceAndNeatThePodcast]

🥃🥃🥃

[@smarieburthlong]

@mrskevonstage @kevonstage @iamtabithsbrown had a similar conversation.