Valve Song: COUNT TO THREE ■ feat. Ellen McLain (official GLaDOS), The Stupendium & Gabe Newell

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This is a song about a game studio that brought us a variety of classics, but never released any game with number 3 in its name - VALVE. The company behind Half-Life, Portal, Counter-Strike, Team Fortress, Left 4 Dead, DOTA 2 and much more.
Featuring: ELLEN MCLAIN, the official GLaDOS from “Portal” and "Portal 2" as GLaDOS!
THE STUPENDIUM, the amazing nerdcore artist, as Gabe Newell!
And finally, Valve’s CEO, GABE NEWELL himself, who sang a couple of lines for the beginning and the end of the song!
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■■■
“Count to Three” by @TheChalkeaters:
Executive producer / songwriter: Alios / aliospony
Music producer / engineer: Tim Maslov [ soundbetter.com/profiles/2693... ]
Arranger / guitars / choir: @ErgyErgy
Lead artist / art director: Pondis [ linktr.ee/pondis ]
Lead animator / video composer: Lenich @LenichKirya
Character animator: @Kiryumia
Gabe Newell vocals: @TheStupendium
GLaDOS vocals: Ellen McLain (original voice of GLaDOS)
Alyx vocals: Holly Turton
Supporting arranger / piano: Dmitry Kovzel
Drums: Matias Menarguez
Trumpet: Bruno Brito
Saxophones: Weber Marely
Trombone: Felipe Coelho
Choir: Hineko, Vasya, Martie, Chaos Angel, tooi_cat, Venix, Walter, Dmitry Litvinov, Tsumikashi, Lenich, Ergy, Dmitry Kovzel, Nikdoge, Felya, Jerico, Choki, Finch under cover, BertyDahlia, Victor Bird
Supporting artists: Hunternif, Koldan Grey, Freskovich, QuietVictories
Mastered by Stuart Hawkes at Metropolis Studios
Special thanks to:
Gabe Newell and Michael ‘Lewi’ Lewington for recording Gabe’s awesome cameo!
Erik Wolpaw for allowing us to use Valve’s characters for the video!
Jamie Lopez, Wendi Wills, Tom McGurk for helping us to get Ellen on board
Bill Van Buren for helping us with the GLaDOS voice
zhenya_hacker, Kizuru and Martie for being our favourite test subjects
Vasya, Nikita Dobrinskiy, Chaos Angel for great ideas and overall support
And thanks to J. Antonio and Genoves Micheli for Spanish subs, Ivo Pavlov for Bulgarian, Martie for Polish, colon_d for German, ジンsay for Japanese, Tangerine for Korean, Bacon jack for Chineese, Igor Lucas for brazillian portuguese subs
#TheChalkeaters #Valve #HalfLife3
■■■
We are The Chalkeaters, the overproduced shtpost band making funny songs and animated videos about video games, game industry and related memes. In a higher production quality than they have any right to be in.
For business enquiries: [e-mail]

[@TheChalkeaters]

Our project survives without ads thanks to your donations. Please support us on Patreon! ▶ patreon.com/thechalkeaters LISTEN NOW ON: 🎵 Spotify: thechalkeate.rs/counttothree_spotify 🎵 Apple Music: thechalkeate.rs/counttothree_apple 🎵 KZbin Music: thechalkeate.rs/counttothree_ytmusic 🎵 Deezer: thechalkeate.rs/counttothree_deezer 🎵 Amazon: thechalkeate.rs/counttothree_amazon And don't forget to add it to your library!

[@Tell.me_Why]

First

[@texasred6814]

When’d GLADOS become your guys friend?

[@chaysonator0783]

DEFINITELY PORTAL 3 PORTAL IS THE BEST GAME EVER!!!

[@NoctisAeterna]

You're merely hallucinating as there's no third reply, it does not exist

[@texasred6814]

@@NoctisAeterna What if I delete my comment.. I have power for you to not exist.

[@CoreyLaddo]

Okay now valve is just fucking with us

[@Sade4848]

definitely feels like it, lol

[@fatalis7147]

Oh definitely. Valve are showing us that they're VERY self aware.

[@mastercollin22]

Letting the days go by~ Once in a life time~

[@saltycat8306]

Wellll they are self aware but Alyx gave us a reason to look forward into the future. SPOILER FOR HALF LIFE ALYX DO NOT CLICK READ MORE. The end after the credits showed us Gordon grabbing the crowbar.... WE CAN HAVE HOPE!

[@Uniformtree000]

You should offer your Gman animation services to them if they need it.

[@amfool]

Valve isn't a triple A company, they are a double A episode 1 company.

[@timetraveler7]

Underrated comment

[@TheDragonfriday]

Valve is SSS gaming company that actually cares about gaming while taking it's sweet time making games.

[@AnimationJ]

Wonder if they can count to 4

[@alexhong1117]

@@AnimationJ 1, 2, and 4

[@wta1518]

A episode 2.

[@utes5532]

>makes fun of his company >makes fun of him personally >Gabe still features in the video personally what an absolute lad

[@SandyStella]

Well, that's pretty mild

[@NottJoeyOfficial]

Dude even helped them get Ellen to come back as Glados and made sure that it was all fine legally.

[@nacl4988]

I mean, It was making fun of their practices, But it was a hopeful positive song, Celebrating that they did good and people want more.

[@iq-ksa5725]

glory to arstotzka!

[@theharvinator7935]

Gabe Newell does not take himself too seriously which, from a CEO, is such a breath of fresh air

[@melodymanic1007]

hearing GLaDOS sing for the first time in years was an absolute suckerpunch to my nerdy heart

[@RealSpaceCore]

69 likes. nice

[@devach9626]

89 likes. nice

[@schauzerbros]

114 likes. nice

[@lives1058]

219 likes, nice

[@alotofbadideas8]

238 likes, nice

[@prysmane3053]

The song length doesn't reach three minutes, only being a second behind. Holy shit that's such a nice touch

[@prysmane3053]

ah, I see. Still though, having it be three seconds is a dope detail!

[@froggyfez]

@@deathpallie I'm pretty sure you're thinking about it in reverse

[@GuyWhoWatchesStuff]

He trolled us AND gave us what we wanted at the same time, madman.... madman

[@milkcreamcheesecheese3671]

Waht

[@Shikaschima]

Not only that, the chorus is used twice if I am not mistaken. The word three is also only said as a full "three" two times as well.

[@DasMxD]

G A B E N!

[@Hayter200]

yes ( ͡ʘ ͜ʖ ͡ʘ)

[@-sirbananacat-2184]

After nine years in development, hopefully it was worth the wait.

[@LazT11]

Gaben looks like a Wizard

[@MrMozzie]

Eyo Love Ur SFM's

[@yohdem17]

yAZ

[@afunnyrandomguy]

Fun fact: Pyro never appears in this video because they're literally the 3rd class you can select in the character selection screen of TF2.

[@murilosindeaux8675]

holy shit that's genius

[@Mick_Facherito]

What about 0:49?

[@afunnyrandomguy]

​@@Mick_Facheritothat's just their mask n' stuff, never truly saw them moving around

[@OCJDaze]

@@afunnyrandomguy also, when their mask is thrown the number 3 shows up

[@pyroonbusinesschannel118]

lmfao now i feel bad abt pyro

[@vickyebborn8682]

"Life gave you lemons" They literally made masterpeices that made millions, they have eveything they need, they just need to make the lemonade

[@almessasorrow4950]

(The Lemon Line was a reference to Cave Johnson's Rant about Lemons in Portal)

[@Napstablook_ghost589]

@@almessasorrow4950 When life gives you lemons don’t make lemonade! Make life take them back!

[@SoulRainYT]

@@Napstablook_ghost589 you sound like your about to invent combustable lemons to burn my house down

[@almessasorrow4950]

@@SoulRainYT burning people, he says what we're all thinking!

[@phroggu]

Just imagine gabe appearing on stage one day with a crowbar

[@arthurmello7907]

And he announces the remake of half life 1

[@ghost2130Main]

@@arthurmello7907 black mesa:am i joke to you

[@d4rkpr1nc39]

@@ghost2130Main Apparently yes. XD

[@Zinc_Nitrogen]

@@ghost2130Main portal 1 doesn't use character models (except for yourself with portal glitch) and besides half life 1 was older

[@hellothere694]

What would be If would say "Do you know I'm a BONK"

[@gaqueglowl]

Valve: What comes after 2? Man: Valve: You are hired.

[@justsomeplantcells-]

It’s 4

[@moriiii4522]

wait i thought it was alyx

[@konstantinkh]

@@moriiii4522 No, no, no. You can't just go directly to Alyx. It's 1, 2, 2.1, 2.2, then Alyx. Learn to count!

[@idioticed4379]

its "and"

[@Michealsoft]

2 episode 1

[@WilliamAftonOfficial_]

the fact that they actually got a real GLaDos, and Gabe Newell as well is just amazing- Edit: Yay! arguments in the replies! :D

[@volga472]

it's the real glados but it's not the real gaben

[@ana_s]

@@volga472it’s actually gaben at the start

[@volga472]

@@ana_s yes but gaben didn't record this for the chalkeaters, i think it's part of an interview

[@egwuregwu]

​​@@volga472he actually did! chalkeaters tell about the song in this video kzbin.info/www/bejne/m3WlkICOopiWe6M

[@Arkede]

​​​@@volga472this is simply false. Check the description. One look proved you wrong. Why else would gabe sing the lines he did?

[@mrshoebill7859]

the beggining in which the iconic valve guitar riff plays and molds into the song is so incredibly satiisfying

[@jalapenojaco3849]

I didn't even notice that until now!

[@Kultas]

Literal GODS

[@sharemation5339]

Ловите Посейдона! sry

[@TheFatMob]

GOTY 2021!

[@googleadministrator3994]

You could say G LAD O S...

[@lakakoi2965]

Культас, как поживаешь?

[@welldzhik]

Я не понимаю, это либо иллюзия частотности, либо тут слишком много людей которых я знаю.

[@huerfanoproducciones]

HL3 is buying cigarretes at the same place as your dad

[@Sir_Litx]

true facts

[@matthewlong7547]

Maybe he'll come back in secret and work with me as a mercenary :)

[@SandiaOfficial]

Pero como lo delatas asi jsjsjsjd

[@Gonger02]

i hope hl3 features the coke loving alien from papelucho

[@jesalt8230]

Aaaah, de ahí viene tu nombre

[@Medic_TeamFortress2]

I love how the song is exactly 3 minutes long, contains the word "three" three times, is sung by 3 different voices and was uploaded on March.

[@Cuharik-exe]

Generally 2:59 minutes

[@Kajemorphic.]

don't forget that it was on the day 29, literally a day before the 30

[@MatheoZ14]

Stupendium, Alyx's voice, Gabe Newell, Ellen Mclain and the 20 voices in the public beg to differ on that last statement.

[@Medic_TeamFortress2]

@@MatheoZ14 I wouldn't really count the 20 different voices.

[@MatheoZ14]

@@Medic_TeamFortress2 Then count gabe, stupendium, alyx, ellen and the public. that's still not three

[@Murkus_xd]

Fun fact : this was “3” years ago and also the vid is “3” minutes and every comment is “3” years ago except the recent ones

[@johnallen6254]

I love how Gabe is so in on the joke he literally makes an appearance just to prove to us all that he indeed cannot count

[@mehcro3622]

his dota announcer pack

[@MineJulRBX]

They probably told him to count to 3 & they got this instead XD

[@TheMiraOfAll]

@@MineJulRBX or they ask him to say one two three and four but be just skipped over three

[@Random_Channel_RB]

@@TheMiraOfAll I’m pretty sure that’s just a face tracker thing where you can put other peoples faces on other people

[@ka_galaxy]

I love the joke about "VALVe is corrupted by money" and "spin the VALVe" it's reference to VALVe logo

[@marcellofilms0]

Half Life: S U F F E R Portal: S U F F E R Tf2: hahaha want some hats?

[@francescodegregorio2824]

TF2: S U F F E R but in a stylish fashion

[@themodestai9603]

screaming eagles!!!!!!

[@Swissy87]

The half life three disappeared when he took of pyro vision

[@ExploderIlu]

ha bots go brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

[@Freelancer837]

Left 4 Dead: S U F F E R

[@Pjjacks]

I love the touch on how when the elevator is going down, it goes from 1-2.2 as in Half-Life, Half-Life 2, Half-Life 2 Episode 1, and Half-Life Episode 2.

[@the_skit_gamer9233]

At the start if you pay attention until the first beat drop the original Vavle game intro can be heard very slightly! Didn’t notice that did you?

[@TheChalkeaters]

We didn’t use it though, we re-recorded it from scratch for this bit :D

[@the_skit_gamer9233]

@@TheChalkeaterswell, it made that cut even though you didn’t add the real sound and did it from scratch, pretty cool you used your version of the intro in the song also the beats amazing! You guys did amazing!

[@sheersternfeld1914]

I still can't hear it

[@muffer62816]

so visible for me

[@plaugeninja1229]

They've actually got the man himself, G.A.B.E.N. to record a cameo, I am really freakin' impressed.

[@birb125]

God, Absolute Being of Energy and Nitrogen

[@MultiInferno13]

@@birb125 NOT MAKING A F***IN' HALF LIFE 3

[@hialsohi772]

@@MultiInferno13 you mean alyx

[@LucasAndSuch]

@@MultiInferno13 what is a three i only count in 1 2 2.1 2.2 and alyx

[@TekuSPZ]

Wait he is. WAAAAAAAAAIT

[@TheIronArmenianakaGIHaigs]

Jokes on us Valve announces Half-Life: Alyx 2 baybeeeeee

[@pumpkinspicecat650]

Alyx: Episode 1

[@corentinp8115]

I'll just call that CBT at this point

[@KRUSH-R]

Half Life: Alyx: Deathmatch

[@ghost2130Main]

Wait what. I was expecting for 3 cause im poor for vr glasses

[@iwiffitthitotonacc4673]

@@KRUSH-R as if valve would use their energy on an arena shooter lol

[@PartOfTheGame]

To this day...I hope the sleeping giant awakens and truly does learn to count to 3...Half Life, Team Fortress, and Portal...Could you imagine?

[@StarFroggo]

3 is sung 3 times, is just short of 3 minutes, and there was 3 people they got to collaborate with. Beautiful.

[@user-td5km4kt5v]

2:59 no 3 minutes.

[@oliveboy9766]

I like how they actually got Chell and Gordon's VAs for this

[@coldbob2]

listen carefully and you can hear claude from gta 3

[@ghastryder3945]

Wait, when?

[@notaguy0599]

@@ghastryder3945 just like in his game, he's on 3:00

[@ghastryder3945]

@@notaguy0599 wait, what do you mean?

[@Nl-pb9bk]

@@ghastryder3945 *sighs* who's gonna tell 'em?

[@ErrorRaffyline0]

Fun fact: A Valve can be corroded by Steam.

[@ruefysh9576]

Deep.

[@Datoneguy_9343]

Dam

[@backinyourcommentsectionag3191]

Damn dude... that's fucking deep...

[@nullified77]

Damn. Deep.

[@DasSlenderMan]

If anything this would be coincidental, not ironic. But it's an intentional lyric either way.

[@Swagman2023]

1:38 I believe when GlaDOS says "The light's been turning green", is a reference to the Steam Greenlight program, that allowed people to vote onto games that looked great, onto getting on steam, and so... it was discontinued.

[@jaden2210]

They say "the lights been turning green", the video has captions

[@Swagman2023]

@@jaden2210 Yikes, well i'm not actually editing that.

[@muffer62816]

@@Swagman2023you did

[@trevrdrudd5638]

I just wanna remind everyone this song was released between 2 and 4 years ago.

[@caecilliusinhorto2773]

I love the fact that this song is exactly 2:59 long instead of being 3 minutes

[@Pagina_en_blanco]

I didn't notice... LoL

[@yasho437]

For me its 2:59 on the video, but on their channel its 3:00 .

[@caecilliusinhorto2773]

@@yasho437 same

[@NoRegs30]

@Kinguim Half-life 2: episode 2.5

[@marcuscampagna1327]

@@yasho437 For some reason youtube always bumps up the runtime by one second in the recommended page

[@Mona-by8qq]

Not only did you get Gaben and Ellen, you’ve also managed to get the voice actors for Gordon and Chell.

[@feetMaster69]

You can hear them during the entire song

[@AL-ey9fx]

What do you me- ahhhhhhh, jeje (it’s funny because they never speak). Fun fact: Did you know the voice actors for Chell and Freeman are the most expensive in history?

[@spacebug5686]

my favourite quote by Gordon is " " such an amazing and memorable line

[@cateyedboy4168]

Yeah, it's amazing they were able to do that.

[@hoogis]

@@feetMaster69 yeah they're the backing vocals

[@ODEF.]

I love how the elevators floors go 1, 2, 2.1, 2.2, then 3

[@echo4428]

it's been 3 years

[@victorfrombs7646]

Petition to have GLaDOS as the voice of the first fully sentient artificial intelligence.

[@sirsmiles1915]

Signed

[@victorfrombs7646]

@@sirsmiles1915 Getting closer.

[@helliox2487]

There is one from couple years ago. A sentient feminine android goes by the name Sophia. She officially received citizenship in Saudi Arabia. There's also a new male one named Han.

[@siphobrisloks8133]

@@helliox2487 she isn't sentient

[@victorfrombs7646]

@@siphobrisloks8133 Yet ;)

[@alexwaddington9808]

This song needs a part 2 with a huge cliffhanger that never gets resolved

[@thekingofcookies4877]

I think that's the joke....

[@serioustable9836]

or he uploads a part 3 but he titles it part 4. :)

[@angelogargamel7067]

You became the very thing you swore to destroy

[@notsocrapmex3286]

Reeee

[@akisa7865]

*Cough cough* Team fortress 2 comics *Cough*

[@AlternateBrian]

It's really cool to see that you actually got some of the people working in valve.

[@AverageYoutubeBrowser]

I can't believe how I only just realised that the video is 2:59 minutes long... ONE SECOND FROM THREE

[@Tarasoul101]

Oh my God you're! I never noticed

[@playeronyoutube]

*Gabe just casually whistling this song on his way to his office*

[@killa8092]

Hi again. I'm Gabe N.

[@vreikezen8268]

A fan of shooters, wizard of computers and a handsome man.

[@notkimz]

Your grandfather used to blather, 'bout him a thousand years ago

[@jonnymcguire4123]

wasn't easy keeping busy, every season brings another reason not to make a game

[@ai_hi5115]

I had it all but tried new things, true. It didn’t get us very far..

[@keelitgames6074]

I just find it funny that valve could literally just advertise the number 3 and immediately hype the entire game community

[@lucasriddle3431]

And everyone would wonder which games it was. Half-life? (I mean probably that one) Portal? L4D? Team Fortress? Dota? THEY HAVE SO MANY FRANCHISES ON 2

[@igunn8632]

They could just advertise the number 3 and I would buy it before it was even revealed which game

[@Colon-D...]

@@igunn8632 Artifact 3

[@chumbucket3475]

I’m imagining an E3 where Gabe Newell shows up and says “3” or plays a voice clip of GLaDOS counting to 3 and everybody feckin’ EXPLODES

[@reteeed3874]

tf3 xD

[@natax1737]

3 years ago now, 3 minutes, 3 mentions of three, 3 invited voice actors, beautiful.

[@Amedyii]

It's been 3 years since this song came out and it is 3 mins long which is perfect.

[@goldenweed1993]

2:06 Gabe said "triple" We're finally moving somewhere

[@sachiconza9406]

Getting there...

[@Tacopaper]

sucks that that was stupedium not actually gabe

[@ceu160193]

@@Tacopaper Damn it, Gabe! When will you learn to count to 3?

[@overfailed3639]

Small steps. Slow and steady wins the game.

[@bramgroot2419]

i mean . .. . .. I GUESS

[@RhiannonSmudge]

Seeing Ellen still taking on the role of GlaDOS puts a big ass smile to my face

[@AnimationJ]

Yes, really nice

[@Martin-vi5so]

I was literally wikipedia surfing earlier and I looked at her page and thought "She still does GLaDOS cameos? Wonder what she'll do next" and little did I know this had just been dropped

[@gladosglados4848]

Love her

[@bluespidergaming7719]

But thiss.....does put a smile on my face

[@testhekid]

she is literally reminding us every day that portal is such a good game

[@versilver]

I like how in the end GLaDOS counts to "1, 2" before getting interrupted by Gabe saying "thank you and have fun"

[@serenityz_pls]

love that this applies to the most popular Steam games, like TF2, Portal, and mainly Half Life

[@Tracenji]

i just realized something gabe newell could probably generate so much excitement by just going on a stage at some game convention and say "3" and just walk off stage

[@divio784]

well that could mean tf3 half life 3 or portal 3 so that wouldn't be a good idea

[@davidamiago]

@@divio784 All of those are still highly requested games so that's a win in every case

[@divio784]

@@davidamiago yeah but if he just walked out and said 3 no one would know which 3 they meant it could even mean dota 3 which would be hilarious

[@davidamiago]

@@divio784 That's a good point lol

[@se.224]

@@divio784 it could also mean all 3 of them

[@SomeElsenNerd420-J]

"...The Valve's been stuck, corroded by the money,..." *Minor Laceration, Detected.*

[@DinoKelFilms]

Morphine, Administered

[@bea71mc35]

They are struggling A LOT

[@therealevilmudbug]

*heartbeat moniter flatlines*

[@ADP23507]

The day Valve creates a game that contains the number three, it may be the first signs of the apocalypse.

[@Darkline-nh1bq]

"Three" -is all this man needs to say to plunge the world into chaos.

[@cameronfarley5910]

“-one, two, ... and four!-“ “-wizard of computers,-“ Oh! No wonder he can’t count to three: Binary

[@regularname1825]

11

[@daythenite5683]

001

[@martinp1054]

@@regularname1825 my god, if the next halflife is called halflife 11...... i will eat my hat

[@regularname1825]

@@daythenite5683 bruh

[@RaffikTheOnly]

0000 0 0001 1 0010 2 0011 3 0100 4

[@GMMReviews]

Imagine if Valve finally release a new Half-Life game, and just call it *"Half-Life 4"* just to fuck with us?

[@DropkickedBarracuda]

i hope they do, it can be a proper continuation and everything, they just never put three into the titles of their games

[@zenogias01]

. . .and then they relief Half Life: Freeman, the prequel to Half Life 4.

[@timetraveler7]

Half life 2.9

[@chloerogers8841]

Half life 2 1/2

[@eddualmeida5790]

Half Life 2.0!!!

[@OzAndAps]

I’m surprised they were able to get Gabe Newell AND the official VA of GLaDOS is insane

[@cusowski6432]

Ellen does lots of stuff for her voices like the sandvich saga and other fan made stuff

[@bentibbly437]

It's crazy to even hear Ellen's voice in over about a decade. And i love how down to earth both gabe and Ellen are during the recording of the song. It just makes them even more lovable.

[@andrewkalten9796]

I just noticed; the song is only 2 minutes and 59 seconds long. It never reaches 3 minutes.

[@Zalgerz]

In my screen it's 3:00

[@syndere6755]

@@Zalgerz I believe it's frames under three minutes, so it'd round

[@insertnamehere1398]

PFFFFFT

[@Aimobilko]

lol

[@aidencarte6178]

YOU MAD MAN

[@JeyM1]

Video is 2:59 in length GLADOS is performed by a real GLADOS They even got GOD-GABEN to read a couple of lines of the song.. "Three" is actually sung three times This is just incredible.

[@MouseGoat]

yeah, this is the ultimate shitpost, we reaching level 6 level of shitpots :O

[@SanityHarvey]

@@skipmanghondarg They got the actual Ellen to voice the Glados part

[@skipmanghondarg]

@@SanityHarvey Yeah-yeah, description whooshed right behind me, im sorry

[@Smartoom]

I am waiting for Half-Life ̶3̶ next game

[@LSFRNG6266]

what i think makes it even better is the fact that except for the choir everyone else is hesitant to say three

[@astraeus_BACKROOMS]

Seeing all the Portal/Portal 2 references warmed my heart as a *HUGE* Portal fan.

[@Mr.DadJunior]

After many years, CS 2 came out, and it's the third game in the CS series, wich means valve finally counted to three!

[@Mr.DadJunior]

Alyx is a spinoff and doesn't count

[@Fahimlol]

It has to have a 3 in the name

[@2Meows]

Imagine if Valve just released all of their third sequels one day with no build up, advertising, or teasers.

[@pk-jn2pf]

Like that'll ever happen

[@squarehead6452]

Orange box 2: Half Life 3 Portal 3 Left 4 dead 3 (cause team fortress 2 is already perfect)

[@2Meows]

Yeah they don’t really need a new tf2 cause the art style holds up to this day, but to be fair the engine is still very old

[@thebagelbird4331]

@@Omnipotent8383 tf2 is far from perfect, I love tf2 but there's a limit It's a masterpiece but like any masterpiece it's flawed

[@_underscore_9271]

They would be able to buy all of China with the money from that

[@Stormimi]

“One...Two.... Alyx.... Four” “Wait wait what was that one?” “Four?” “No before that” “Two?”

[@AnimationJ]

Wait they can count to 4, never thought they could even make it to 4

[@somerandomgamer8504]

"Alyx?"

[@Literikdoor]

eleven twelve Alyxteen fourteen...

[@bigd8924]

Nononono, after two but before four...

[@Tankirb]

@@bigd8924 2 episode 1?

[@hypnosistimes6802]

Is this what you've been waiting for? Say, "One, two and four" Guess what comes after Hi again, I'm Gabe N A fan of shooters, wizard of computers and a handsome man (Your grandfather used to blather 'bout him a thousand years ago) Wasn't easy keeping busy Every season brings another reason not to make a game (Oh, why bother, just another wasted day in the studio) I had it all but tried new things, true It didn't get us very far Between controllers and machines you Still picked a rusty old crowbar Nobody sees beyond my sharming self A soul that's never truly free So, just for once, forget the summer sale And give it up for Half-Life, Alyx The valve's been stuck, corroded by the money Has not been oiled for years We didn't even hope to see it running But now you're bound to learn how to But now you're bound to learn how to This time you're bound to count to three Well, here we are again Except we're long forgotten My circuits niggling up and down my spine He said it's worth the wait His weight keeps pressing harder But Alyx gave us hope we'll rise and shine For soulless card games and hardware releases The light's been turning green Life gave you lemons, take them out the freezer This time you're bound to learn how to This time you're bound to learn how to This time you're bound to count The numbers are intimidating It's hard to give a fresh new start When everyone's anticipating Another masterpiece of art If this machine keeps playing dead We may end up on the other side So hold on to all your hats Let's show 'em a triple-A done right The valve's been stuck, corroded by the money But after many years We can't believe the engine started running This time he's bound to count to three Full steam ahead, we'll end this idle running Let's give the valve a spin! We've got some work to do, so take this, honey This time you're bound to learn how to This time you're bound to learn how to This time you're bound to count to three Thank you and have fun

[@melon5031]

i had only played TF2 and portal 2 before this, after this i played: portal, half-life, half-life 2, half-life 2: episode 1, half-life 2: episode 2, entropy: zero, and entropy: zero 2. very cool

[@moistbmw750]

Now its time for L4D1 and 2, Half Life Blue Shift and Opposing force , and Black Mesa

[@if-i-was-rude-i-am-sorry]

“This time you’re bound to count to three!” Everyone: Portal 3? Half-Life 3? Team Fortress 3? Left4Dead 3? Valve: Steam OS 3.

[@onion2787]

OH MY GOD I DID NOT REALIZE THAT THIS WAS LIKE.....thank you....

[@martinfyhn1976]

Left4Dead3 = Back4Blood

[@kirbyisnotapokemon4750]

back 4 blood doesn't look very good

[@mkatrfamily4404]

"there evolving, just backwards"

[@reddragontr4542]

@@kirbyisnotapokemon4750 ikr

[@TheStupendium]

So awesome to see this project come together! Thank you so much for inviting me to take part, it was an honour!

[@TheChalkeaters]

Thank YOU for being a part of it!

[@MagyarGaben]

@@TheChalkeaters No YOU hang up!

[@ghost2130Main]

You both are legend

[@hotbebra872]

u did great work!

[@starstrikefuck]

*you did amazing on this*

[@Hamoody12345]

For some reason this actually gives me hope for any and I mean any valve news

[@Gatorboy5678]

0:02 He should have said “Is this what you want to see? Say one two… And four!” 😂

[@tttdssdff2267]

The fact that this song is 2:59 and not 3:00 makes this a perfection

[@ArturFlintchannel]

Actually, 2:58, since KZbin still add one second to all videos. Though, it's no [3] either.

[@PouLS]

@@ArturFlintchannel KZbin doesn't add any seconds to any videos. This video is 179.06 seconds long, which is more than 2 minutes and 59 seconds (but less than 3 minutes), and if you go frame-by-frame you can go to 178.92 seconds (but can't go any farther as YT is a bit glitched and you can't see the last fractions of second), which is ~2 minutes and 59 seconds anyway.

[@monsieurnugai]

this took me a second

[@lais6303]

@@tim9680 good for you

[@MrMozzie]

@@tim9680 I care, it’s a neat fact

[@DrunkenMisu]

I love how TF2’s level just says “Competitive searching”

[@lollolol3983]

R.I.P competiteve mode......

[@MrSloth-tl5yv]

Rip any casual server fucking bots

[@c9k984]

@@MrSloth-tl5yv That too

[@AgainWhy]

@@MrSloth-tl5yv What if Hard TF2 Bots vs Bots Bots

[@dafuqmatt]

@@AgainWhy Making anti-bot bots does nothing bruh

[@xmplayYT]

All right, I've been thinking, when life gives you lemons, don't make lemonade! Make life take the lemons back! Get mad! I don't want your damn lemons! What am I supposed to do with these? Demand to see life's manager! Make life rue the day it thought it could give Cave Johnson lemons! Do you know who I am? I'm the man whose gonna burn your house down - with the lemons!🎉🎉🎉🍋🍋🍋

[@caml8312]

I love how its only 2:59 seconds long never going over i love it.

[@nothingrhymeswithorange5294]

Hearing GLaDOS say "well here we are again" made me feel good.

[@annoying_HK_guy]

To me it's the Turret choirs and that Sentry,as well the Merc

[@filindoyt6594]

I know, i felt pressured to subto them.

[@wheatleypurse]

It gave me that 🥰 feel

[@suntzu8168]

But it’s always such a pleasure

[@pcman--5326]

+

[@confused9413]

The fact that gabe newell actually did some lines is incredible

[@mothermia]

Just to show he's aware.

[@confused9413]

@@mothermia he's aware of the memes we're making or to show how stupid it is that they can't count to 3?

[@faxmachine1162]

@@confused9413 precisely, perhaps they are going to count to 3?

[@BeckyNosferatu]

And he... REALLY hasn't aged well. Poor guy, I suspect he'll have to die before we get _any_ 3rd installments of games.

[@thrashmetalkid6669]

@@BeckyNosferatu Are you kidding? Gabe looks fucking great

[@DisplacedSquidify]

I didn't know how much I wanted glados in a dapper hat until this

[@LilBuddyArmy]

A list of what I think may be less known references 0:01 The sound played in the backround is a different version of the sound that plays when you boot up a valve game or pick up the HEV suit in Half Life 2 0:14 DR COOMER!!!!!!! (Not actually known as that, but it was popularized to call him Dr Coomer due to one of the names on the lockers being Coomer) - Half Life 1 0:16 The TF2 poster has the engineer doing one of his taunts, plus a demoman wearing a popular meme outfit in TF2 history - TF2 (I dont know anything about CS or dota) 0:21 There's a lot here; 2 Garden gnomes (There's a Half life 2: Episode 2 achievement where you bring a gnome from the start of the game to the end), Pyro statue - TF2, Cube - Portal 1, Pyros unicorn balloon - TF2, A MANN CO supply crate (It's a weapon lootbox) - TF2, Barnicle - Half life 2, and a poster of the engineer nope meme. 0:23 Another reference to the Half life 2: Episode 2 achievement where this time its in a Portal tube (This tube seems to be a mix of both games) - Portal 0:27 The portal gun fires in reverse (They have the color of the last portal you shot) - Portal (Either game) 0:49 The 'Valve Index' is pyros mask with VR headset eyes - TF2 0:50 You get transported to pyrovision, what pyro sees in TF2 1:09 The door seems to be a reference to the Portal 2 underground aesthetics - Portal 2 1:12 This core thing appears in Half Life: Alyx, though I'm not sure if it appears in other Half Life games 1:18 We have ATLAS(Portal 2) on the piano, Dog(Half Life 2) on the drums, the 4 defective cores(Space, Fact, Adventure, and Wheately in order - Portal 2) playing an instrument, P-body(Portal 2) playing an instrument, and then we have Judith Mossman, Dr kleiner, Combine Soldier, Barney Calhoun, a Headcrab Zombie, Wallace Breen, and Eli Vance. Theres also the lyrics of the video playing in the video backround very similar to portal 1s ending where the song 'still alive' plays.

[@TheBROTOTYPE]

“Say one, two and four” - Half-Life 4 CONFIRMED

[@omundodevictorcalixtodelim9752]

AaAaAaAaAaAaAaAaAaA

[@racinracerxp8645]

spy: no

[@casualmma]

Exactly!

[@franciscofernandezmedrano9613]

I kinda think the part of counting to three is the wait for portal 3

[@jarvis6253]

@@racinracerxp8645 *kills everyone producing half life 4*

[@nodisapointmentvideos3164]

We now have the Disney Hero song to counter Todd Howard’s villain song. I fucking love this.

[@firenzarfrenzy4985]

@Jacob Smith veteran getting back innit

[@authorhazel1554]

the anti hero

[@firenzarfrenzy4985]

@@authorhazel1554 That's what I was looking for!

[@HisKaisernessTheRat]

I guess it just works

[@kaiji4419]

@Jacob Smith Nah, is just the second half of hero's journey

[@BBL0K]

Count To Three... years?

[@Demon_NightshadeNEXUS]

My favourite part was that Monster that was playing the Guitar and GLaDOS singing, even the ending and also the audience singing. Classic, man.

[@youssefabdelfatah6909]

This song shows more hope for Valve than Bethesda's song

[@goldenage6439]

you should read the chalkeater's fun fact on this song if you haven't already

[@ratcrusher3251]

@@goldenage6439 what funfact?

[@goldenage6439]

@@ratcrusher3251 the one that they just posted 6 days ago

[@chiaraj1003]

@@ratcrusher3251 That because Gabe was such a nice guy to work with, they scrapped the "It just works" vibe

[@ghanig9948]

@@chiaraj1003 in other words Gabe wasn't a prick

[@EgorKlenov]

I'm proud to witness such a masterpiece

[@Forvennm]

Epic Edit:i agree the guy below me is spitting straight weird curved facts

[@NuAreD]

Ого и ты тут

[@user-de9ow9vg8n]

О, юр спик инглишь?

[@EgorKlenov]

@@user-de9ow9vg8n аск

[@vinminkaplay6257]

Идеальное колличество лайков, когда я писал было 333

[@memesandgames9661]

"The problem is not knowing the number 3, the problem is knowing what comes after 2 " -a wise man

[@Sofatiner]

Спустя 2 года, мне снова попался этот шедевр! Спасибо вам Chalkeaters! ❤❤❤

[@smilemore7431]

This one is a lot friendlier then “It Just Works” you can tell they actually like Valve’s games despite poking fun at the lack of a certain number.

[@yazidefirenze]

Say one, two... and four!

[@nurakermmeho7908]

To be fair, Valve isn't selling HL on all of the goddamn platforms without a hope of a sequel. We just have no hope for a sequel(not really, Alyx gave us hope now). Gaben may be bathing in money, but he hasn't been uploading bugged as hell games constantly and asking for more money in a paid game(artifact isn't a game anymore, so yeah)

[@ErwanFrosterFox]

@@nurakermmeho7908 Technically Artifact is now a sort of abandonware ? It's free at least. And pretty fun ! But I'd never have payed money for it. But it's a fun concept and game ! Just monetized horribly.

[@MarmoMossBoll]

tf2

[@TheDJBrojo]

The jazz is real here

[@twodogsandadingo3331]

"Your grandfather used to blather about him a thousand years ago" This is hauntingly accurate to how talking about Valve feels

[@yazidefirenze]

"Hey, you know Valve made this cool game called Te-" "-eam Fortress 2, I know. "Oh. Well what about Le-" "-ft for Dead, yes, I know both games." "Well what about C-" "-S:GO, yes, I KNOW!" "And Ha-" "-lf Life 1, 2, alyx, 2 episode 1 and 2, and even Portal and Dota."

[@huemanporson9954]

@@yazidefirenze what’s funny is that back 4 blood doesn’t even have three in it

[@yazidefirenze]

@@huemanporson9954 it's also not made by valve.

[@huemanporson9954]

@@yazidefirenze “it's the product of Turtle Rock Studios, which was originally established in 2002 and acquired by Valve in 2008. For a brief period, during which it released the first Left 4 Dead, Turtle Rock was renamed Valve South. However, a rift in coordination led to a split between Valve and the studio, with Valve South separating and renaming itself Turtle Rock as a new independent company in 2010. Even after the split, Turtle Rock still retained many original L4D developers on the staff.” Your right, but this was made by the the people that were owned by valve at first and the fact that it’s still not left for dead three and still clearly left for dead, kind of adds to valve not being able to count to three.

[@twodogsandadingo3331]

@@yazidefirenze I was talking to a family member and told him about a TF2 game and he said "looks old" and was gonna tell him it only came out like 4 or 5 years ago... Pain

[@JackRace11]

I literally forgot how hard this song smacks, need to come back and listen to it more

[@RonaldTrumpOfficial]

The Chalkeaters are the only people not getting neurotoxin flooding their work commune

[@pesty4592]

in a Gabe themed dota voice pack he said "More than 2, and less than 4 kills" for the triple kill. Gabe is great.

[@wildfire9280]

👌

[@underfire8411]

👌

[@prev8374]

😐

[@berkkurun9109]

👌

[@rickrolld1367]

1 2 Alyx 4

[@theredknight3736]

For some reason, looking at Gordon and Chell dancing makes me happy

[@dipstick06]

fr it gives me so much serotonin

[@theredknight3736]

@@dipstick06 Yes

[@AnimationJ]

It gives me hope

[@waffle_bars]

It really is a clever way to include an iconic pair of silent protagonists

[@spamtongspamton3422]

Two of the best franchises together. Hoping to be cared for.

[@Hydrant749]

i love how people are saying that three has been said a total of three times on the course of the video, but ignore the part where all of the crowd say it at the same time

[@thewelshballanimations6931]

Valve is the DreamWorks of gaming the only difference is that instead of the third one being terrible they just never release it

[@King-xx3jf]

The Steam Deck runs SteamOS 3.0 THEY’RE LEARNING!

[@50blessings52]

I swear I keep seeing more and more people of TOH pfps... I don't hate it lol

[@menteko6004]

So when is portal 3

[@johnxmanny]

And Disney is just Valve but with cartoons (Sometimes they don't count to three)

[@bejdiodwjxjxkx9834]

@@menteko6004 one day maybe

[@bejdiodwjxjxkx9834]

@@johnxmanny Disney has a bad habit of milking its franchises

[@gamertames349]

I absolutely love how in the elevator scene, the floors go "1, 2, 2.1, 2.2". The level of detail is so good

[@owenkelsey6279]

I've watched this like 30 times now and i haven't noticed that yet haha

[@dorte_1232]

A half life reference :’(

[@generalfloppa5798]

And the video is 2:59 minutes long

[@joshuaweppelman4270]

@@generalfloppa5798 my god take my upvote and get out.

[@box2143]

@@joshuaweppelman4270 redditor

[@Neuwey331]

I love the fact dead games like Alien Swarm and Day of Defeat isn't even a part of this.

[@KnigtOfSwan]

Oh those sneaky sweet electro things in swing, goosebumps are real.

[@ianmarvin124]

Imagine if this is the official teaser trailer for HL3.

[@laugh4624]

Imagine it's a song for one of the games

[@AngelWingsYT]

@@laugh4624 or all

[@SamuelRodriguez-dp6uy]

This is a trailer for starting to make a 3rd game of all of the games Beside left4dead they sold that

[@lemo8986]

lowkey i think this is Valve's way of teasing a sequel to a game. Dota 3? Nah, Dota 2 is still making bucks Half-Life? Just got Alyx, nah Team Fortress 3? Maybe, TF2 hasnt had an update for 4 years so they could be working on it Left-4-Dead? Sold and a new franchise in the same universe just came out Counter-Strike: 3? Maybe, but CS:GO is still rolling in cash Portal 3? Probably, Portal hasnt had a game for 7 years and P2 was the most highly rated game in gaming history Or maybe.... Steam 2: This time with more sales

[@Sparrow_Bloodhunter]

honestly after all these years this is pretty much the only way to announce it properly, no normal game trailer can do these games justice at this point.

[@theparrishshow9803]

Watching GLaDOS wear a fedora singing a jazzy theme while Chell and Gordon Freeman dance together is something I never knew I needed

[@potatoboooi5168]

The thing we didn’t know we wanted

[@moistisverydead9191]

@@potatoboooi5168 exactly

[@moistisverydead9191]

I couldn’t tell if it was intended to be chell and freeman I knew one was chell but I didn’t know about freeman

[@theheavymetalbrony2257]

Indeed, I personally found GLaDOS with a hat to be really cute.

[@theparrishshow9803]

@@theheavymetalbrony2257 I did too, for a powerful force hellbent on killing you, she can be pretty cute at times

[@Windowkey02]

>prays to source >(bugs) >??? >wins game

[@esfrnshesegysegt]

"Full steam ahead, we'll end this idle running. Let's give the valve a spin." omg steam? made by valve? omg omg

[@theninjascientist689]

"Life have you lemons, take them out the freezer" Lyrical genius.

[@bluespidergaming7719]

No You make life TAKE THISE LEMONS BACK I DONT WANT YOUR DAMN LEMONS IM GONNA BURN LIFES HOUSE DOWN.....WITH THE LEMONS YEAH IM GONNA HAVE MY SCIENTISTS CREATE A COMBUSTABLE LEMON

[@gianpeterborejon379]

"when everyone's anticipating another masterpiece of art" That's...actually a lot of pressure

[@oliverfougere6296]

Ye

[@Delta-es1lg]

Why do you think we haven't had Half Life 3 yet? With all the suspense and hype that'd surround it, it's basically guaranteed to fall short of expectations.

[@oliverfougere6296]

@@Delta-es1lg Yup, it's a CyberPunk situation

[@Certifiable]

@@oliverfougere6296 Worse. Half-Life has been a massive hit for 24 years! As have the sequels and spin off related games like Portal!

[@schpungus]

I mean at this point i feel like they should say "calm your crowbars" and say shut the fuck up for once.

[@en_rn7383]

I hope KZbin doesn't update the date until a nother year later