Verbatim: Follow the Chicken | Op-Docs

In this dramatization of transcripts from a legal deposition, lawyers grapple with a plaintiff’s bizarre testimony about the destruction of his chicken’s pasture.
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This is a dramatization of a deposition given by a chicken farmer in the destruction of his chicken pasture. The chicken farmer goes off on a rant that everyone has to see.
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Verbatim: Follow the Chicken | Op-Docs | The New York Times
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[@unclecreepy7025]

Timber lawyer: Your honor, he signed a contract. Chicken lawyer: Your honor, my client is clearly mentally handicapped and unable to enter into a binding contract.

[@ashamansedai]

That's a valid defense honestly

[@Besat]

Sounds like they could use an expert in birdlaw.

[@1337Einstein]

+Gorash Harvey, get in here!

[@Bodmw01]

+Bill Varnerin Harvey Birdman Attorney at Law may be a suitable choice, as Harvey is a great defense attorney, but if you really want to get at the meat of bird law, you really need to contact the services of Charlie Day out of Philadelphia.

[@julianwhitton5272]

Omg just how; what did i just watch. T guy does have a point about chickens tho

[@ulyssesno490]

CHARLIEEEEEE

[@favrerules04]

That attorney totally besmirched the farmer, he needs to get satisfaction.

[@takoma74]

im scared. He started making sense to me.

[@user-qr7eb1sf3l]

Tak I know

[@jordanstewart2455]

There's nothing to be scared of, you are just beginning to except the way of the chicken is all.

[@eNodeTG]

This process is normal. Once you have fully embraced Chicken Goddess we will employ you to tender to her flesh, for the purpose of influence over the masses. Your consciousness will be added for the collective benefit of the global human / chicken alliance. Congratulations. 🎉

[@darrenmarchant1720]

he is right about chicken being very popular. www.quora.com/How-many-chickens-are-there-in-the-world Richard Combs Richard Combs, former Consultant on Expert Testimony (1976-1990) Answered Mar 2 2017 · Author has 4.7k answers and 7.2m answer views Per Counting chickens The world's average stock of chickens is almost 19 billion, or three per person, according to statistics from the UN's Food and Agriculture Organisation.........

[@andrewmarshall4604]

there ARE a LOT of chickens, and what he is saying does appear to be a strong legal argument.....

[@drharmonica]

The gentleman who played the chicken farmer is a fantastic actor. A big BRAVO to his performance.

[@killersalmon4359]

+Dr. Harmonica I agree. I think it would be really difficult to memorize dialogue that made no sense or had no internal consistency.

[@carlrs15]

he was in deadwood iirc

[@zammmerjammer]

He was the crazy old man in Cabin in the Woods. He seems to have a lock on that type of character.

[@JorgeBana]

So true,

[@seancancook1]

plot twist -he's not an actor. It's the actual chicken farmer

[@themore-you-know]

"Drink the Kool-Aid" -> Join someone else's insanity. "Follow the chicken" -> To go on your own insane path.

[@jamesblackburn8110]

I'm just glad that the sentence "Okay, what does a chicken have to do with God?" was seriously uttered by a lawyer at a deposition.

[@InvictusByz]

His last point is pretty valid though. Every society has a place for somewhat unhinged chicken farmers.

[@ProjectEkerTest33]

Yep, honestly if he showed up talking like that I would welcome that man into my home... and keep him talking while I waited for the police to show up

[@biketickler65]

If I recall correctly, French poultry farmers can partially be credited for the EU as we know it today.

[@tiffles3890]

_"A man who knows Chicken as well as I do, has a home on any culture of this world ..."_ He has a legitimate point there ...

[@Dennisgoyette]

Except vegan culture lol

[@mr.l6332]

I had the same thought when he said that. It's kind of reasonable.

[@johnny1893]

Go vote for Trump...

[@Dennisgoyette]

@@johnny1893 did once and can't wait again next year!

[@johnny1893]

@@Dennisgoyette BTW Dimwit... When the coal is coming back?

[@525Lines]

01:02 He doesn't report his poultry farm income is what he's saying.

[@j.zsyd11]

+525Lines you got it.

[@Michael_Lederman]

+525Lines He's been living with chickens as his only companions for too long is what he's saying.

[@caseybedwell-coll5252]

in response to a yes or no question, this man stated that: • he knows osama bin laden • he nearly died from every animal in the world • god is a chicken

[@kly8105]

Don't be cinical, he clearly has a chicken fetish, of course he is going to say chicken once every 30 words, he is barely 80.

[@Holdontohappiness]

Arise chicken, arise!

[@Nikifuj908]

​@@Holdontohappiness MEGA ULTRA CHICKEN!!!!

[@pancho7647]

Well, yes/no questions asked without context can be misleading. And, as we all know, context is chicken.

[@SierraSierraFoxtrot]

God is a chicken? I think he lifted that from a book by Frank Herbert. "Race for God".

[@MilA-eh3gf]

I thought I struggled and needed subtitles because English is not my first language, then I saw the comments and realised that it's not me it's him... Thanks commenters you saved my self-esteem.

[@dorkmax7073]

That $3,200 was what was known as "please just go away" money

[@Bane_Diesel]

Never ask a question you don't know the answer to..... "what does the chicken have to do with god?"

[@chrisrosevids]

The amount of regret in that man at that moment has never been matched.

[@zoa9720]

Should have asked where Osama is. Clearly the man knew something.

[@Michael_Lederman]

Okay how is this not a weekly tv show? It's more entertaining that most of what gets on TV and educational too.

[@hayaokakizaki4463]

You would love Night Court

[@Michael_Lederman]

@@hayaokakizaki4463 Not really. Watched a few episodes could not get into it.

[@AndroidOO3]

He goes into it completely unprompted. This is air into gold.

[@DamagedSoulonevoicein7billion]

The next time I eat chicken I think I am going to cry . . . . Thank you dear chicken for keeping the world together and making this planet a better place. . . .

[@allanclements5801]

Don't believe a word of what this crank says. Chickens are sinister creatures, allies of the surly cows, the enemy of decent people everywhere, yet delicious when smoked and covered lightly in bbq sauce.

[@grendelum]

...we salute the international bird !!

[@makisjnx007]

You mean a "chickins"

[@bejoysen4468]

This actually makes sense lol. He's like those GOT characters who can warg into ravens, except he can inhabit the bodies of chickens. He's the three-eyed chicken and knows past, future, and present everywhere by simple virtue of the chicken's importance to humanity.

[@ge7862]

I love the confused look on the stenographer's face.

[@troodon1096]

Well, it's their job to record everything that is said, no matter how insane it seems.

[@TheDarkFalcon]

Been waiting for a Verbatim since the photocopier episode :D

[@KastaLimpa]

+TheDarkFalcon Can you explain what you mean when you say photocopier? I just want to make sure I understand you correctly so I can respond to your comment.

[@jmullentech]

LMAO dammit Kasta!! xD

[@alperenbulbul6367]

KastaLimpa it’s gas powered averages 1000 copies per gallon and knows where Epstein is

[@Andrea-he5io]

Jesus Christ. That lawyer was not paid enough for that

[@johnhooyer3101]

Are you sure? I'd pay to be in that lawyer's shoes.

[@suchaluch5615]

Maximum Respect for the actor playing the Mississippi man... His performance is incredible and outstanding. We don't know, how much he got paid for this gig, but it can't be enough! May the chicken be with him...

[@SapientGalaxy]

If this is verbatim and the stenographer got all this, I want to know what was missed.

[@gazeboist4535]

The stenographer didn't get it all; that part where he starts going through lists of places and stuff around 2:30 is in the transcript as “(Talks a thousand words a minute of different towns.)"

[@elizapedersen4702]

I've been around the world 6 times on the back of a chicken!

[@j3ttagrl420]

"the chicken is man's best friend! ...dog... they say dog..." 😆

[@MyNameIsJ3ffrey]

This gives me “arguing politics with my uncle during thanksgiving” vibes.

[@jonathanlovelace521]

There's a strange poetry and power to the chicken man's nonsense.

[@NelsonStJames]

We need more of these! If ever there was a patreon that I would gladly contribute to. . .

[@wordsmithgmxch]

Bravo, Verbatim team!! A lot of love, talent, and plain old hard work has gone into finding these obscure testimonies slumbering forgotten in some dusty file, and bringing them back to life...

[@mattneff]

"Would you be interested to know the chicken you just pointed to is not the defendant?"

[@DanHarkless_Halloween_YTPs_etc]

NYT, please make more episodes of "Verbatim" - this one and "What Is a Photocopier?" were pure fricking gold! 😃 (And "The Ferguson Case" was quite well done as well, though I prefer the funny ones. BTW, you guys forgot to add "The Ferguson Case" to your "Op-Docs" playlist.)

[@Mythmaker12687]

I'm not sure which is more crazy: this man, or the fact that he apparently won.

[@Vanlifecrisis]

The chicken won't lead you astray.

[@cernunnos8917]

That's just the thing- he won by being so crazy, nobody could argue that he was aware enough to knowingly sign off on the deed. Turned it into the logging company manipulating a crazy guy, thus he won the case. Brilliant, even if he is genuinely nuts.

[@radish6691]

These are really well acted. Seriously. This I would pay to see more of.

[@TF489]

I don't know how the courts work or anything but I'm guessing by having himself declared mentally incompetent whatever contract he signed became void and maybe thats why he was able to win that 3200.

[@LeoStaley]

Some Guy the only comment on this thread of any value. The man clearly was not connected to reality.

[@scienceme9794]

Some would argue that chickens are the only thing that's real. What do you think? Do you follow the chicken?

[@RainbowManification]

He only went off the rails after he was questioned about his poultry farm income. I'm guessing he wasn't paying taxes on it and wanted to avoid giving deposition testimony that could be used against him later.

[@efenty6235]

this is poultry farming as an art. he isn't doing labor, he's taking an action that connects hime to God. it makes complete sense and i wish i could meet this man

[@acrophobe]

First there was Newton. Then there was Beethoven. And Nietzsche. And Einstein. And finally, there was......chicken guy.

[@andgalactus1]

This guy is like something from an HP Lovecraft book.

[@ferretyluv]

andgalactus1 doesn’t look enough like a fish.

[@TchaikovskyFDR]

Well at least he aint the cat.

[@madeconomist458]

The witness was in Better Call Saul! I *knew* I recognized him from somewhere!

[@johanejp]

Oh yeah, he's Mr Harkness, thank you!

[@creanero]

The Plaintiff's attorney should have been given the equivalent of the nobel prize for managing to win despite having a client like that.

[@trevadetrev]

Did you get the part about Osama bin Laden

[@jackpavlik563]

trevadetrev follow the chicken...

[@RainbowManification]

If only Cheney had followed the chicken

[@Valkalium]

"I got that part..."

[@bronevaya]

These are absolutely brilliant. Hats off to team!

[@Lucifronz]

Team? You mean the actors? No one wrote the script, it came directly from a court transcript.

[@bronevaya]

That was an unfinished post, let me clarify... Hats off to the team who put this together!

[@jayyyzeee6409]

"Your honor, I'm just a simple hyper-chicken from a backwoods asteroid..."

[@planetofthegapes]

Nailed it

[@ferretyluv]

Please do more of these. They’re fantastic.

[@maxenceberiou1729]

New catchphrase ... i did it all because of the chicken.

[@kurumais]

well i'm convinced

[@thegreenbaron6439]

1:19 Absolutely did not see that coming! And so it begins...

[@andrephx90]

This series is the best lol

[@SomeFreakingCactus]

He’s the real-world equivalent of the cuco farmer from The Legend of Zelda.

[@MA-gk6rf]

If this guy ever becomes a cult leader, I’m so joining his cult of the almighty chicken😂

[@reasonablyskeptical]

i really need more of these, this is amazing

[@operarhodo]

You need to continue this series and do more of these...

[@hoodyxx]

But was he wrong tho?

[@accussednerfherder]

Legal transcripts are usually exceptionally dry reading. Then you find something like this or judges making jokes or teasing parities to a dispute and the hundreds of pages you just read through are worth it.

[@cameronscott6717]

These verbatim are the most amazing thing to come out of a news company

[@tylernilson7021]

"I'm sayin, I went around the world six times on the back of a chicken"

[@scienceme9794]

I now understand why Leeroy Jenkins was satisfied with having chicken, despite the fact that he and his party were dying horrible deaths. In the end, all you need is chicken.

[@allyourcode]

Not a lawyer, but I'm wondering how the plaintiff's attorney allowed the plaintiff/witness to run with all this. I guess he already knew there's no stopping him. He must charge by the hour. Seems unethical, but anywho...

[@JumpingTuna]

Dude was just plain nuts.

[@jll5568]

"it's turtles all the way down- restin' on the back of a chicken"

[@HandsomeLongshanks]

"I know where Osama Bin Laden is today." My brother: "what does that have to do with chickens?!" Me: "no, no. He's got a point." My brother: *stares at me like I'm insane*

[@corvettez06usa]

This guy is the kind of fellow who posts on /pol/

[@quelorepario]

For anyone loving these Verbatim videos, you should check Rick and Morty in the courtroom.

[@nickc3657]

I’ve never felt so inspired

[@evan.hongzhengyang7135]

What's the song at the end? Can anybody tell me, for the sake of the chicken ??!!

[@maxnelson8446]

I have been searching for an hour. It is a Soundcloud song, here is the link (It is by Jordan Kolasinski) soundcloud.com/jordansthings/music-composed-for-the-short-film-verbatim

[@j.d3804]

The golden rule: always follow the chicken

[@KnowFunOfficial]

he's not wrong... chicken does unite everyone.

[@HousePetMarla]

Fumes from chicken feces have been known to make people crazy.

[@oosamaaaa]

Is he tho.

[@rustyshackleford5875]

Dude got the wrong kind of lawyer, he needed someone who studies bird law

[@jaimistefani8271]

Finally a reason to subscribe to the New York times. Lol

[@johnbondza]

The monetary award is all wrong. The Judge should have got $20 000. The court recorder $5 000 and the farmer a BBQ chicken roaster.

[@AmazingJellyfish]

i love these . Please keep doing these.

[@kgldude]

No person alive could ever predict where this video ends up.

[@nicolasrubin811]

This is truly wonderful

[@baileyayyy5085]

I'm convinced that the chicken is superior to the eagle

[@felixsanchez2075]

This man spitting straight facts

[@AndresCoronadoGtz]

Discovery requires experimentation

[@theneuromancer]

Wish captions were available. I guess NYT does want the deaf to enjoy this

[@censusgary]

Preaching the Chicken Gospel.

[@jakobrose8278]

He should've hired Harvey Birdman.

[@__nog642]

Wait if the court reporter didn't get it, how did they know that part? Or was it the video camera?

[@leiffitzsimmonsfrey4923]

From 2:30 to about 2:34 the transcript just says "(talks a thousand words a minute of different towns)".

[@bodenlosedosenhose1590]

I knew it. The chickens are the cure to all of mankind's problems.

[@huntertony56]

the New York Times finally has something worth watching

[@shiddy.]

I want this actor to host one of the presidential debates in character

[@MrSuperJaskirat]

I LOVE THIS SERIES

[@ethanomcbride]

GIVE THIS MAN $300,000 NOW

[@atmyhouse478]

After the Barr hearing, I need more of these.

[@MaskedManMikeMD]

I think it's safe to say he is very proud to make his living in the chicken industry.

[@ginoc.9739]

I am the Mayor of Djibouti, and have never met this man.

[@humanbn1057]

I reckon that's one way to keep from having to testify at trial.

[@Vaelosh466]

I feel like if I were the defense attorney (who I assume was the one asking the questions), I'd be smiling and goading him on to make him seem more insane. It's always good to make the other side seem untrustworthy or disconnected from reality. That's probably why he kept on the line of questioning with what chickens have to do with God (which I'm surprised the plaintiff's attorney didn't stop).

[@oosamaaaa]

Everyone was dumbfounded. That's why

[@MorganEdgy]

Hold on, he has a point

[@GreenLuthor]

This may be my new favorite thing Reed Diamond has ever appeared in. (And I love Reed Diamond, ever since Homicide.)

[@filthyfrank6166]

ngl i actually understand this guy

[@SCMabridged]

He's not wrong....

[@Bogster13]

He's probably a little wrong...

[@miro.georgiev97]

Outrageous. Weird. Hilarious!

[@theresistance6622]

I've never had a firmer grasp on reality before now, oh nah nah.

[@KOZGERFWAD]

Welp…I’ll never get that 5:51 back

[@kalashnakov0477]

The lawyer i remember from Homicide Life On the Streets and the Chicken farmer as Buddha from the 90s movie South Central

[@altrogeruvah]

Call me crazy, but he's definitely onto something here.

[@terrymckelvey2206]

Now I know how to properly advise a client to prepare for an EBT ;-)🤔

[@paulborst4724]

Welp, now you know why the chicken crossed the road ... to get away from that guy.