Wedding Night Sex Q&A - Part 1

[@hadassaheritage]

Finally a healthy, appropriate, and comfortable conversation about sex. Thank you for abiding by God, as so many couple compromise when it comes to sex. This was very comforting to watch

[@TiffanyDawn]

Oh I’m so glad!! So encouraging to hear it was comforting and comfortable. 🙌🙌

[@angelacaulfield2855]

James is so wise! And I love how you guys aren't afraid of talking about this, this channel has been helpful for me in many ways.

[@TiffanyDawn]

He really is so wise!! It means so much to hear how this channel has encouraged you! ❤️❤️

[@uuuhmanda]

I remember whispering about sex in my husbands ear during our first dance haha!! We were so excited for that night. We are so glad we waited. We weren’t 100% pure, so it wasn’t ALL new, but it was still so special and awesome. I appreciate y’all talking about this so much. The church doesn’t talk much about it!

[@TiffanyDawn]

That is so cute!! I’m sure he loved that whisper 😂😂 It’s so special how excited you guys were!! I love that!

[@jazminestryder]

I've always wondered if people do that lol!

[@louizam9203]

Its good to have such information being shared under the umbrella of christianity. Thanx a lot

[@TiffanyDawn]

🤗🤗🤗

[@prabhashjain5735]

@@TiffanyDawn by

[@linuxsurfer2002]

We left the "sex on the wedding night" decision open, as in maybe we will, maybe we will wait until the next day. This helped my wife tremendously, she assumed I would insist on it being that night, but I told her let's wait and see. She has told me multiple times that she appreciated that. Turns out she was good and ready that night!

[@TiffanyDawn]

That’s such a good way to go! It means so much when the pressure is off. Thank you for sharing this!!

[@geoboy700]

Seriously?

[@linuxsurfer2002]

@@geoboy700 Seriously!

[@aliosama3149]

You are really a man and you are role model in married life

[@dopkasa.1171]

Currently single, abstinent, and happy Christian here. Sooo grateful and thankful for this video. Lots to think about.

[@TiffanyDawn]

🤗🤗🤗

[@MelanieAnneAhern]

Thank you SO much for this video. I’m currently two months out from my wedding day and all the little details can sometimes be overwhelming! I feel like my fiancé and I have pretty good communication about expectations and all that for the wedding night, but it’s really nice to see a godly, married couple talk through everything. Appreciate y’all so much :)

[@solstudios941]

Eeeeh! I’m so excited for you! Congratulations!!

[@TiffanyDawn]

Congratulations!! That’s so exciting you’re getting married in just two months!! 😍😍🙌🙌 I’m so glad you enjoyed this video. That’s awesome that you and your fiancé have great communication too - that’s huge!! Communication is everything! 🤗🙌❤️

[@InternetJules]

I LOVE the fact that you promoted the idea that your husband should see parts of you before marriage in order to be excited with the idea of him seeing all of you. That is why modesty culture can be so toxic, it only feeds fears of sexuality and body insecurity. Your man will LOVE your body, and it's healthy to give yourself a chance to realize that before he sees every square inch of it. Thank you Tiffany!

[@TiffanyDawn]

Yes!!! It helps alleviate SO MUCH anxiety too!🙌🙌

[@foolishdrunk2181]

I think you missed the point. He will most likely be disappointed with what he sees

[@tingowealeans5712]

​@@foolishdrunk2181 Exactly, 'it only feeds fears of sexuality and body insecurity' only because we've got hyper sexual pornified advertising and music videos and lyircs that are so pervasive and infected us with wholly distorted expectations. If we didn't have this, and still had actual societal modesty where everything that is currently hypersxualised and pornified was desexualised and depornified, those unrealistic and unhealthy expecations and comparisons wouldn't be made in the first place, and the erotic thrill of your spouse (who you love deeply and have just made the ultimate commitment to) naked would be more than enough to keep the fire burning for a young couple. Anecdotally I used to be more of a 'romantic' as a kid and never had friends (who are the main influencers in your teenage years if you don't have particularly strict parents) who were 'laddish' if that word means anything to you (lad culture etc.). As a consequence it was not until I was 19 and went to university and started hanging out with 'the lads' that I started to learn to see (and 'appreciate') women's behinds as sexual. Before this, and before hanging out with 'the lads' it was just something that never occured to me. Don't get me wrong as a teen ofc I used to jack off and find women/porn/music vids sexually arousing and hot etc. but 'the lads' would notice a woman's behind in public or on TV in completely unsexualised instances and have to point it out and go 'oooow check that out lads' whereas before I started hanging out with them I never would have noticed or cared. All this to say it that it's often pushed that it's in men's nature to notice and like certain things, and while it is in some instances to some extent, to another degree in other instances, such as the objectification, sexualisation and fetishisation of isolated body parts or the body as a whole as described above, it is often a huge factor of learned behaviour rather than nature. I believe that while there is obviously supposed to be a strong physical attraction element in a spousal/sexual relationship, and that can include finding a body of broadly 'normal' and healthy proportions attractive (i.e. not morbidly obese or skeletally anorexic) the key aspect of attraction should obviously be towards the PERSON (and in conjunction, the face, given this provides the clearest expression of the personhood behind the exterior) rather than any isolated, objectified, fetishised or anxiety-inducing single element of the body (navel was mentioned in this case). There is nothing wrong with (in fact it's great that the couple in the vid were) enjoying each other's body's to get in lingerie etc. (I would draw a line at toys personally though). Same for getting turned on by your naked spouse in flattering lighting, nothing wrong with utilising physical material elements of reality to enhance an experience, after all, creation was made good, but all I'm saying is that it needs to be in the right context i.e. personal, intimate sexuality in marriage and not cheap pornified objectified sexuality. Oh, while if you're out of shape or there's something physical you want to work on (within reason, not obsessively) there's nothing wrong with that (so long as you're doing it for the right reasons) but know this: I think that again, providing you're healthy, genuinely any guy who's loves you and will have just made a life long commitment to you will genuinley LOVE the things you see as 'imperfections' (like the wife's navel mentioned in this vid) PRECISELY because of the reason they're uniquely YOU. There's no escaping this, and a good woman only deserves a man who (among other things) will affirm as such given what they've got to deal with in terms of pressure on looks/beauty/being skinny/instagram hot/etc. etc. Anyway this turned into an epic rant/ramble so ty for coming to my ted talk.

[@tingowealeans5712]

Also to clarify, by depornifying and desexualising society and going back to proper societal modesty, I am not ncessarily implying women should not be able to wear bikinis ever. I think modesty and dress and revealing clothing for both men and women are important things to consider (would a one piece be better than a bikini or should a buff man go shirtless for e.g.), but the modesty begins in the hearts and minds of the people rather than what's exterior, so can appreciate the sentiment re: 'modesty culture can be so toxic, it only feeds fears of sexuality and body insecurity' given the context of the pornified and sexualised culture that dominates.

[@tingowealeans5712]

Also I've just noticed how ironic it is how much my profile pic looks like the face a guy makes when appreicating a passing woman's behind smh

[@enbyentitty6486]

My husband and I talked about the wedding night for a few weeks leading up to our big day and decided that what was best for me (getting rid of the anxiety I had around that night being perfect) and what would be best for him (wanting to have intimacy with me but also wanting to make sure I felt safe) was to simply get rid of the expectation for having sex right then. We didn’t say we would, we didn’t say we wouldn’t. Having that conversation actually built a lot of trust between the two of us!

[@TiffanyDawn]

That is such a good example! It really does build so much trust and intimacy to have conversations like that - and to be so understood by your husband! That is beautiful!

[@HelenaQuintanilla]

I'm really glad you guys talk about all these topics without telling people sex is dirty, I've heard so many Christian telling others to feel bad for sex and forbid birth control!! I really want to be virgin till marriage but also I want to know about what to expect on my wedding night and how talk about it with my future fiancé!! God bless you guys!!

[@TiffanyDawn]

Yes!! It's not dirty at all - it's so beautiful!!

[@erb90us]

@@TiffanyDawn That is if your allowed to enjoy it without interference and threats and hate and ignorance. Which in my case is highly unlikely. So i am glad you having a good time i guess. I won't be.

[@MK-ze1jg]

How old are you.u have BF or want one like me very nice, attractive , handsome and very very devoted and sincere guy.

[@erb90us]

@@MK-ze1jg What!!!!!!!!!!!! I am a guy!!!!!!!!! And i am definitely not interested in you!!!!!!!!! What made you assume i was a woman?!!!!!!!! I don't know whether to laugh or be pissed off!!!!!!!!!!

[@MK-ze1jg]

@@erb90us Do laugh or piss as you feel better.If you mind what I said, I am really sorry I my self do not know why I said to you like that where as I was talking one girl on an other link. Sorry once again if you mind that.Please just ignore that.Take Care.bye.

[@EmilyClaireDaly]

Yes someone’s talking about it 👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼 You two are so great!

[@TiffanyDawn]

Awww thank you!! 🤗❤️

[@lnambz]

This one, confident talk about sex within it's proper place is so needed. Thank you guys for stepping up & adding to the Christ centred voice on hot topics that needs to be championed in our society!

[@Barbara-jq2se]

What a clean channel on this topic. Thanks you 2. It’s really nice to see your husband being so supportive, kind, caring, thoughtful, trustworthy etc. 😊🙏💝

[@marvinbenjamin3015]

I've been in church for 27 years and that topic is like a needle in a haystack. Thanks for the video.

[@ciannacoleman5125]

I’m nowhere near this point in my life but love that you are talking on this subject, such good info for future use. Also liked your advice about toys, makes perfect sense

[@stephenamberleighwedding4812]

I was 100% a virgin when I married, and when he tried to get right too it, i asked if we could wait as it was a little tight! We had a buch more for play, then suddenly i was good with it and there was no pain. And even though I had put on weight just before the wedding, all i could see was admiration in his eyes (i had been VERY modest) so I felt super comfortable. My period was due on my wedding day, and I chowed down on certain herbs that can induced my period a week early.

[@TiffanyDawn]

Thank you so much for sharing your experiences! This was beautiful!

[@pandora9814]

umm what herbs?? i'd love to know

[@vikumugisha1635]

@@pandora9814 me too

[@MK-ze1jg]

If periods blood start what should then couple do as it is very embarrassing.??? Continue to complete untill he ejaculate or stop immidiately and ejaculate by masterubating.as may be she feel uneasy.

[@shippingluvar13]

Glad you guys addressed pornography here. It’s such a poor representation of sex so I seriously wouldn’t recommend anyone glean any information about how it’s supposed to work from there.

[@TiffanyDawn]

That’s such a good point!!

[@tingowealeans5712]

@We McLaughlins It is an absolutely enormous problem, and personally think it's so large and so deep that every Christian dating advice aimed at guys NEEDS to be qualified with a message of 'guys, if you're not long-term clear from this, don't even think about start thinking about pursuing a Godly woman' and wonder how many enter into relationships with this bubbling under the surface, even if for them it's not particularly bad. On another note I would challenge re: addiction diagnosis. Yes it changes the brain like drug addiction, yes you build up tolerance and need more/more extreme to get the same high like drug addiction. But it is not the same in that you're phsyscially and chemically dependent on it and if you do not engage in that behaviour there will be physiological consequences. It is also unhelpful in that it provides a veiw to the person with the behavioural problem that they're a victim and that they cannot help it 'because it's an addiction.' Men (and increasingly women) definitely need help, and definitely need to learn re: plasticity of the brain. I think a lot of men will be aware of the idea already, having already looked up information concerned about their porn consumption, but will definitely look out for and look forward to your video.

[@cathyb2967]

We McLaughlins My bf makes me watch porn with him so we can copy what they do .

[@threestars2164]

How so?

[@Quntah888]

@@tingowealeans5712 I would love to see a video on this.. 🤔

[@clares-b98]

So so recommend her wedding night talks! They were sooo helpful to listen to just before our wedding.

[@TiffanyDawn]

Oh yay!! I’m so glad!! This comment made me so happy!! And congratulations on your wedding and marriage!!😍😍😍

[@clares-b98]

@@TiffanyDawn my husband and I listened to them together and had some really good discussions and then on our wedding day had an amazing wedding night ❤️

[@destineyhopkins7097]

I would be so embarrassed to ask these questions but I'm so glad that you answered them praise God for you and your influence

[@jocypare6019]

the honesty. 💖

[@TiffanyDawn]

🤗🤗🤗

[@bekahmoten2308]

I so appreciate your openness and vulnerability in this video while staying wholesome and appropriate. Such a great resource. Thank you both so much for sharing!!!!!

[@TiffanyDawn]

Oh yay!! This was so encouraging to me - thank you!! 🙌🙌❤️❤️

[@bekahmoten2308]

@@TiffanyDawn 😊😊😊

[@joshuamoore2341]

Most awesome vid on this topic. I've seen others and it's not a competition or anything. But you guys hands down are the best with this. So open, thanks.

[@TiffanyDawn]

That's so encouraging!! Thank you!!

[@daniellekirkpatrick9965]

Thanks for making this! Im so glad I found this channel awhile ago, nice place for a non dirty talk about sex

[@TiffanyDawn]

I'm so glad!! That makes me so happy!

[@TiffanyDawn]

"a non dirty sex talk" - I feel like I should have named the video that! 😂💯

[@wesleer4780]

These are the type of Christians we always wanted and needed

[@11cucumbers]

When a good, quality, godly man loves you, he loves who you are - your character, your personality, your quirks. Because he loves who you are, he will indeed in turn love your body because it’s YOURS and he loves YOU!

[@sophieghaffari9006]

You guys are so cute wholesome! I’m a young Christian and you’re so inspiring! ❤️🥰😘

[@AngelaWang724]

Thank you for being so open and honest about this topic!💕

[@TiffanyDawn]

I’m so glad you enjoyed it!! We had so much fun making this video 🤗

[@carrien.wagner8877]

Getting married on Saturday... It's Wednesday. So glad you produced this video when you did. I watched the wedding night talks, but this added a lot to what you already said. Thanks so much!

[@TiffanyDawn]

I’m so glad!! ❤️❤️❤️ I’m so excited for Saturday too!! 😍😍

[@MK-ze1jg]

God bless you all happiness of marriage and paun free first wedding night.take care do lot foreplay and use some lubricant to make easy pain free penetration.relax your muscles and you hand over you self to him happily willingly and each moment cooperate each other.Then I think you will get only plesaure and no pain at all.

[@anakarengr]

How much time before the wedding should a couple talk about sex (not only general terms, but in more specific terms)

[@TiffanyDawn]

Great question!! I think it depends on the couple - and knowing yourself - like how much feels like it's too much for each of you. Typically I'd say start talking 3-6 months before the wedding, since some conversations (i.e. birth control, wedding night expectations) can take awhile to talk about and then implement (some birth controls need to be started 3 months before beginning sex). For us, I started reading "Intended for Pleasure" about 3 months before the wedding, and around that time we talked about preparations for pain - specifically if he wanted me to work on stretching before the wedding or wait for him to work on it with me after the wedding (we talk about that a little more in tomorrow's video and a lot more in The Wedding Night Talks). I think James read the parts of "Intended for Pleasure" that I underlined about 1 month before the wedding, and we talked more specifically then about what to expect. For us, it was a lot of ongoing conversations that got more specific as it got closer to the wedding. I hope that helps!

[@kategreg2422]

Thank you Tiffany and James for talking about a lot of these things honestly and from a Godly point of view! I'm getting married on July 11, during all of this craziness in the world, and my fiance and I have listened to your wedding night talks TWICE already as we approach the day! I also love watching all of your other content. It is so helpful and wise!

[@immcguyver07]

My humble opinion: i think it is ok to discuss some things about it fairly early on. Your expectations are an important aspect of compatibility and a lot of this is biologically predisposed. If your expectations in that area of marriage are not reconcilable with his, that may create an unstable marriage. If for example, you desire 10 encounters with your husband a week and he desires 1 encounter a month with you, then that just may be a dificult compromise for you to meet in the middle on. If you are going to be at an impasse on that, or one or both are going to burn yourselves out by passively bending over backwards to halfway meet the other's expectations (no pun intended), then it is probably better to discover that before you are headed toward getting engaged than after. Yes this is not the most important aspect of compatibility, but it is still important. It should be discussed anongside the other 'checklist' items. Where do you want to go to church? How often do you typically attend. Where do you want to live? What do you like to do in your free time? What are your views about abortion and what would you do if a doctor advised you to get one and said it was for your safety? Besides your faith, what are your values? ... And last but not least, the akward questions. What types of sex acts do you desire from me the most? How often? Do you think it is a sin for a married couple to [fill in the blanks with something that should obviously fall under "Marriage is honorable in all things and thr bed undefiled"] .... If there is any obvious reason a marriage is likely to be unstable regardless of the reason, it may be for the best to find out early and move on to find a compatible spouse. It is certainly better than getting a divorce or being in an adulterous marriage.

[@govindrai4232]

OOoo really

[@geoboy700]

@@govindrai4232 mhmmm

[@gracefulhumble7248]

You guys are to cute. Tiffany your hair is gorgeous it has always reminded me of Jenifer aniston when she was in friends. I found you a few years ago before I became a believer you were the only christian channel I found at the time where I did not feel judged or pressured into faith. Now I love the lord, always appreciate your honesty.

[@TiffanyDawn]

Oh my goodness this whole comment made me SO HAPPY. Thank you!!! And I’m so glad you never felt judged or pressured here!!❤️❤️

[@linabambina2628]

Hallelujah!

[@naydrasnowfield8404]

I was the 2.1k like!! Great video☺️ I’m fairly young but this video helped a lot. I’m a Christian who plans on saving my virginity until I’m married. At first I felt uneasy about it and there were so many things I over thought, but you guys have reassured me!

[@spencergrau4608]

Wow, kudos to you guys for talking about these super important things so frankly and simultaneously politely. Good job :)

[@TiffanyDawn]

Awww thank you!!

[@adrienneguzman1394]

Finally I have been waiting for a video like this.. Praying for this ministry! You both are a BLESSING.

[@TiffanyDawn]

Oh yay!!! This makes me so happy!!

[@lgurley]

I’ve never needed a follow up video so much in my life. Can’t wait for tomorrow!

[@TiffanyDawn]

Hahahaha YES!!!

[@esi_dankwa]

Amazing . I love this so much and I can’t wait for the part 2🙏🏼

[@TiffanyDawn]

Yay!! I’m so glad you enjoyed it - we had so much fun making it! 😍

[@tashainjena]

My husband said he didn't care what I wore, it was gonna wind up on the floor anyway. Lol.

[@TiffanyDawn]

LOL so true!!

[@kennethfok]

The clothing is just meant to arouse him so that foreplay will begin. Men need to be stimulated. Best is to put it on and let him see it, and try to arouse him to remove them for you.

[@rachelknapp7271]

Oh how I wish I’d watched this before getting married!! I soooo wish we had agreed to wait and not have sex on that night because it caused semi long term sex problems for years. It was sooo painful-and we couldn’t even manage it successfully until we got home! The thing is, my husband could tell I was super nervous/anxious and suggested waiting (that night, we didn’t discuss it before), but I’m the one who pushed it because I thought it was the “right” thing to do. I wish we’d taken our time and gotten more familiar with our bodies and sexuality first!

[@Marie_Garwood]

Thank you sooo much for this! I absolutely loved it! So helpful and so authentic without being graphic. I can not WAIT to purchase the wedding night talks when I’m engaged one day! I am a virgin and I’m pretty nervous about it being painful. I know you address that in your series and I’m so anticipating that!

[@AllieLittleMonster]

If it makes you feel any better, I felt zero pain! The first time I remember asking my boyfriend if it was really happening because there was no blood or pain like everyone thinks there is. My best advice is just relax. You have to not tense your muscles. When you do that, is when you feel pain because you’re tightening yourself which cause cause a bit of tearing. As long as you’re relaxed and lubricated you will be fine!

[@TiffanyDawn]

Yes that was a huge worry for me! I was so thankful that it ended up being such a good experience instead of a painful one due to the techniques we share in The Wedding Night Talks! 😍🙌

[@TiffanyDawn]

Yes relaxation and lubrication is HUGE! Great advice!

[@123smileon]

I love how honest these conversations are!!

[@AllieLittleMonster]

I’m glad you two are sex toy positive!! I was cursed out and berated by a Christian in the comment section of an old video for suggesting sex toys. I see no issue with them and they have brought my husband and I lots of joy. Granted, I’m not a Christian nor did I wait for marriage but I don’t see anywhere in the Bible that says it’s wrong to use sex toys.

[@TiffanyDawn]

Oh goodness!! I’m so sorry to hear about that experience! Yes sex toys are fantastic tools- we use them ourselves sometimes too!

[@Melly_Elly]

Um actually the Bible does talk about it in Ezekiel 16:17.

[@agentorange153]

@@Melly_Elly That's not what it talks about -- rather, it talks about idolatry (and in particular about putting money ahead of God)!

[@somethinggood9267]

@@TiffanyDawn like what kind? Like dildos?

[@gracemorganspeaks]

Love it all glory to God. Whoever is reading this God hasn't brought you this far to abandon you trust Him for He is not a man that He should lie.

[@TiffanyDawn]

🙌🤗

[@abbyr.]

Amen!

[@roseedgar8571]

you guys are so legit! you have real advice not sugar coated in what you should or shouldn't do. I look up to you and hope more Christians have your mindset about life. I feel we are so alike!

[@boundinloveproductions8561]

I honestly don't know if it's weird or not that as a single virgin, I think I may know than most married people do about sex. I think that may be expected though, since I've had to work past a lot of negative messages that I've had put my head from battling half my life with porn/lust related issues. I've made every effort to do research and put it in a positive perspective. And now I want it to be something to look forward to someday and know how to bless a future spouse. Oh, one other book that I've read that I've seen recommended is The Gift of Sex. It's honestly the sex ed reference book that I wish I had got in highschool to understand how "things worked". It's scientific, and not coloured by any theological type of bias or dated as far as I can tell. It also talks about how to handle body issues for both persons while being together for the first time.

[@TiffanyDawn]

That is so awesome that you’ve done that work to move past negative images of sex! And thank you for sharing that resource - The Gift of Sex sounds amazing!!

[@floriane5903]

Love you guys! It's so awesome to hear your guys open and honest opinion. 💕

[@TiffanyDawn]

I'm so glad!! ❤️❤️

[@chadbridges4775]

Glad you two added God the way it was intended

[@MalloryNewcomb]

It is quite different to have both the husband and wife discuss this together: I feel like a lot of advice for females involves just the wife’s perspective and usually she is speaking from her personal experience. Also y’all did a very good job at giving specifics where it can be educational while keeping an appropriate level discretion.

[@sanyuagnes1162]

So very informative, got married last Saturday on the 16th May 2020 and most of these we had talked through before the big day..

[@TiffanyDawn]

Ahhhh congratulations!!! That’s so exciting you just got married!! Praying God’s blessings on your marriage! ❤️❤️

[@MK-ze1jg]

After how many days you performed first real night and was it painful or not.how much long penis hurt and she bleed.I heared that small penis don't hurt as hymen is flexable and small penis can not rupture it thats why no pain no bleeding.but sexual pleasure is there as most erotic part of vegaina and G sopt is in 2.5 inches area at entrance of vagina.

[@aramintawilliams5205]

Thank you for these videos! Very informative and personal questions people are afraid to ask thanks so much.

[@TiffanyDawn]

You're welcome! I'm so glad you're enjoying them - that makes me so happy! 😍

[@HarvardChickie]

This is my first time seeing you two and I think you’re so adorable and I love the honesty!

[@friedmangos]

Not a Christian. 26 year old sexually healthy woman for quite a few years, and with different partners. And I somehow find myself on this video. Your perspective is refreshing. Makes me happy knowing there are accepting, tolerant, wise and insightful Christians who are not promoting this narrative of “shame” about sex. Though you waited until marriage, and that’s a hard thing for me to “understand”, you guys speak about the topic in such way that isn’t hurtful and misinformed. Bravo to you two, beautiful couple. Much love.

[@Tarlyne]

Believe, is not really hard to do so (wait until marriage) because is something that we grew up knowing or decided to do. However, I completely understand what you mean, I sometimes get tired of this "Christian" people who only mention what they want from the Bible 🤦🏻‍♀️. This is the 21st Century is not like I can choose to not talk about sex or hear about or have questions about it.

[@MrBoLT__]

Jesus loves you and wants you're heart

[@andisiwemnyazi328]

I’m single and hopeful even during this quarantine 🙈 I’ve been single for 11year now I just never saw the need to date because my missionary lifestyle is way too busy for that and I’m traveling most of the times or I’m just serving as a missionary at my home in South Africa 🇿🇦 I’ve watched your talks and I find them honoring and just beautiful I will definitely save this and listen to it again when I’m engaged Thank you again for this video

[@lemasteraustin12]

Have to say, much better in comparison to other videos (christians) on this topic. So optimistic, accommodating and celebrating of sex without being explicit. Great job!

[@nicolegordon129]

My friend gave me peppermint oil shave oil the morning of my wedding. She had been married for almost a year. She also told me some other things that had worked for her. It works great even with a reg razor. Fortunately there was no pain on wedding night, honeymoon, or ever. Yay! We were both virgins. I was nervous about our first night but I wasn’t concerned about it all day long. I can understand the concern. You will figure out what works best for you and when. It is quite fun to explore. I was quite shy in the beginning but have become a bit more open to try new things as time has gone by. It’s been almost 20 years. Reading books can be helpful before and after marriage. The Song of Solomon really inspired us when we were married. Also, it’s helpful to know how you and your spouse view sex, positions, etc. even prior to marriage. During premarital counseling our pastor shared about how the marriage bed is holy and undefiled. All in all, books, premarital counseling, and tips/answered questions/advice from married friends can be really helpful.

[@MrBoLT__]

Hey Nicole, the only sex position that is allowed is the missionary position, all other positions are forbidden and not permissable they are sexual immoral for example doggy style position and cow girl where the women is on top these are a abomination to the Lord also keep away from sodomy (Anal, oral) sex

[@cfrost87]

I think that the anticipation question really goes hand in hand with the expectation question. Gotta talk about what you both are expecting and want to do that night, and even talking about being ok with not having sex the first night.

[@sincerebolden6710]

Thank you for this information, even though I'm not getting engaged❤

[@TiffanyDawn]

You're welcome! I definitely would have wanted to know a lot of this before engagement too!

[@lolshey707]

I really hope and wish to marry someone someday that’s like ur husband I don’t mean it in a disrespectful way by no means I just come from a very toxic family and communication without a fight is almost non existent i can see how toxic my parents relationship is and it’s the reason why I haven’t had anything or even been in a relationship bcs I’m scared of getting into something like that and u know what they say since it’s something normal in our family it becomes something we also end up wanting in our relationships so in the end I can also be a toxic person and hurt my future partner so God has been helping me to process and understand how a relationships actually suppose to be and what to be And do if I ever do end up in one. thanks to people like you and ur husband I look forward to it, thank you for ur vids and advice ❤

[@danicamacho3551]

these two are so beautiful!

[@TiffanyDawn]

Your comment just made my day! ❤️

[@calliepartridge6702]

thank you so much for this. my boyfriend and i are still a while away from getting married (though we have talked about it and that is 100% our plan) but these conversations make me feel simultaneously excited for our wedding night and excited about the goodness of waiting until then!! the openness is so so appreciated. you're doing such a great thing here, thank you for honoring God and your husband so well!

[@MrBoLT__]

How is your relationship now? Hope all is well

[@deborahekweozoh3137]

This was very interesting to watch. I am really looking forward to the time I’d have such a story to tell. Amen!!

[@TiffanyDawn]

Yes!! It will be so awesome to hear what your story is one day!❤️

[@deborahekweozoh3137]

Tiffany Dawn ❤️❤️❤️❤️ thank you Tiffany !!!

[@Teyxo07]

So nice seeing a happy and purposeful couple as you two. 💟 Though im no way close to getting married/engaged you guys have inspired me. May God bless you both💕from India

[@TiffanyDawn]

I’m so glad this could inspire and encourage you! ❤️

[@potatohead264]

5:50 A little confused at this whole thing. If you are going by biblical standards, (waiting for sex until marriage) why would you disregard the old testament verses about not laying with a woman on her period? Marriage shouldn't forgo that

[@SugaBabieT]

Because we're living in the new testament now🥰❤

[@angelicacalderon8243]

You guys are awesome! You answered questions that I didn't even know I had. Fantastic video! I'm not engaged or anything, but some of the questions were definitely something I have asked to myself. I feel like... Peace. Thank you. God bless you.

[@TiffanyDawn]

Ohhh that makes me SO HAPPY!! 🙌😍

[@mrskelseydw]

Do you follow Leviticus 20:18? “If a man lies with a woman during her monthly period and has sexual relations with her, he has exposed the source of her flow, and she has also uncovered it. Both of them must be cut off from their people.”

[@ariannaroldan5424]

Do you follow Romans 6:14? "For sin shall no longer be your master, because you are not under the law, but under grace."

[@MrBoLT__]

Willful sin is still sin

[@shiraflax5876]

I’m Jewish and think you guys are the cutest things ever!!!

[@TiffanyDawn]

Awwww thank you!! That makes me so happy! ❤️❤️

[@shiraflax5876]

Tiffany Dawn 🙏🙏😍

[@erikamartinez4788]

😍 God bless you

[@shiraflax5876]

Tiffany Dawn 🙏

[@katie12rose]

You guys are adorable together 💕. Thank you for being so honest & open about your experiences. I’m not married yet, but my friend who is married recommended feminine wipes, as well, for the honeymoon & for sex in general ☺️

[@TiffanyDawn]

OH that's an awesome thing to add to the honeymoon go bag!! Thank you for adding that!!

[@MK-ze1jg]

Yes wipe must be there as required immidiately after ejaculation for clean up.

[@ashleydowney1222]

This video is helpful even though I am probably years from being engaged or married and I am in my late 20s, but I think that is good to hear so I will know what to do if the time does eventually come for me to use what I learned from this video.

[@TiffanyDawn]

Yes!! I'm so glad it can be helpful for the future! 😍

[@pebblesduckmurray]

1st of all, I’m loving this transparency. 2nd Christians need to have these open conversations. So glad I stumbled on this channel.

[@TiffanyDawn]

Oh yay!! We're so glad to have you here!! 🤗

[@TiffanyDawn]

Hey you guys! Thank you all for these AMAZING questions!! 😍🙌 Is there any other advice you’d add on these topics? And we’ll see you tomorrow for Part Two!🔥

[@Hannahmcdaniel18]

I frekin love you all ready!! #FirstTimeWatchingYall❤️❤️❤️y'all are so amazing both of you!🤗

[@ep94-v7j]

Love this channel and your video!! Btw what’s your and his mbti? I love the chemistry between you guys lol

[@billhull6842]

Waxing. That is the way to go!!! I am a guy and I even get waxed and I love it!!!

[@userdoesnotexist5160]

Wow very interesting😂😂 Thanks for sharing.... It's helpful.. Good one 😊

[@mischellyann]

I like how positive and comfortable you are discussing this. We need to have real, frank conversations and advice.

[@hades12686]

Actually, period sex is disallowed in Leviticus 18:19.

[@Wolfheart-ew5df]

I wanted to know if you are able to download the videos from the wedding night talks after the purchase. I wanted to give the course as a gift to a friend who got engaged recently, since I think itcould be very helpful for her.

[@alexa-li4es]

Omyy, i just found your channel & I was able to watch few of your vids, and I've really learned a lot 🥺 I'm so inspired by you and I can't wait to be as blessed as you are with the beautiful family you have right now. Me and my boyfriend are both virgins and Christians and if in God's will that we are destined to be together in the future, for now, we will patiently wait our time and avoid all these temptations (w/c your videos helped a lot.) You surely will be included in my prayers. So much love, Ms. Tiffany! 🤗❤️

[@TiffanyDawn]

I'm so glad these videos have encouraged you!! Thank you so much for sharing that - it means so much to me!!

[@MrBoLT__]

How are you and your husband doing now?

[@elysedefoe1287]

Thank you guys! A great resource that my fiancé and I have read through is "Sheet Music" by Dr. Kevin Leman who is a Christian psychologist. I'm on my second read through and my fiancé is pausing the reading until we get much closer to the wedding. I would HIGHLY recommend it to any engaged or married couple to go through. He covers just about everything, included past abuse and how to seek healing. It's like the complete encyclopedia on the subject of sex and intimacy.

[@TiffanyDawn]

Ohhhh so good to know!! Thank you!! I will have to check that out! 😍😍

[@kategreg2422]

We have been reading that too! That is such a great and honest book. I love that it does not beat around the bush at all. Our premarital counselor (pastor) is having us read it as part of our counseling and both of my brothers and their wives read it close to their wedding date as well!

[@megahustlers387]

Tiffany and James are the best

[@megahustlers387]

This type of love is the best, I have been taking all her tips, they're the best

[@dcg509]

What’s your advice for two men on their wedding night?

[@MK-ze1jg]

Is it possible two men??? How they do sex then and where insert there penis.It's not apealing to my mind.

[@sambailie4773]

I got my period the day before my wedding and killer cramps!!!!!

[@TiffanyDawn]

Oh noooo!!! How awful!! 🙈🙈🙈

[@somethinggood9267]

That sucks! Howd you survive?

[@genevievedobson6351]

You guys are great :) Thanks so much for your insights :) xx God Bless

[@TiffanyDawn]

🤗🤗🤗

[@chasingthesun90]

You can also use birth control to delay your period for a couple of weeks so it doesn't coincidence with your wedding day/ honeymoon

[@vikindia]

I love how you talks about this things that I wanted so much to know before I got marry

[@TiffanyDawn]

🤗🤗🤗

[@lujanlagoria1204]

Hey! I really love your videos but I am confused about having sex during the period. Can you talk about that? What do you think about?... "You must not approach a woman for sexual contact during her menstrual uncleanness." Leviticus 18:19 CEB Greetings from Argentina!!! Keep going girl💪

[@abbyr.]

This is in the Old Testament as part of the purity laws for the Israelites. The purity (clean/unclean) laws do not apply to us in the New Covenant. The moral laws still do apply (i.e. the Ten Commandments, etc.), but not the purity laws. They also had a law in the OT that a woman was unclean while on her period and had to go through a 7-day process to become clean again (Lev. 15:28). We no longer require sacrifices and rituals to be clean in God's eyes because of Jesus' once-and-for-all sacrifice on the cross for us, which makes us clean in God's eyes (if we are believers, of course). I hope this is clear and helps you out! 😊

[@carolking4002]

I hear smd and agree in part with the view shared by Abby. I personally for hygienic reasons n else dnt think it would be wise for a man more especially if youre a virgin or both are, to experience it with the grossness that comes with a period. Im saying this in view of obvious anxieties experienced on the night as is... Now to add a bloody affair eeeww... Id much rather enjoy the company reflect on the day cuddle laugh makeout etc. And save it for after❤️😍🙏

[@abbyr.]

@@carolking4002 I totally agree. I'm not married, but I can only imagine how messy that would get!

[@TiffanyDawn]

That's such a great question!! I think Abby and Carol gave really awesome answers and thoughts on this question. Abby's answer is great as far as the moral aspect, and Carol gives another perspective that you might not want your first time to be on your period, which is a good point! It's totally personal preference! :)

[@in0love0w0it]

Do you have any recommendation for some one who has had sex before but have decided to stop again and wait for marriage? books, blogs/vlogs, any resources would be helpful.

[@hollon1697]

Look I understand some body positivity stuff, but let’s face it. Men want women to be in shape. Men want women to be shaved and grooved. I fully expect men to reciprocate this for women. Let’s not try and explain this away with “Do something that makes you feel beautiful.”

[@s.h.u.l.a.ministriesoverco6231]

Hi James and Tiffany, Leviticus 18:19, no sex on menstrual. Thought I would share this. ❤

[@cbentler4528]

As a Catholic, I believe that marriage should be Free, Faithful, Total, and Fruitful. Freely entering the relationship by your own free will... Being Faithful to your spouse emotionally and physically...Totally giving of yourself to your spouse-mutually. So that includes physically giving of yourself, not holding anything back, even your fertility...Fruitful, so basically life giving. I know some couples have troubles conceiving and such, so this one sometimes becomes difficult to do on their own. But it basically means being open to God’s will and how he will bless you in your marriage. I’m not an expert, but I fully support what the church teaches. Have you heard of NFP, Natural Family Planning?

[@TiffanyDawn]

Thank you for sharing this! What a beautiful phrase: Free, Faithful, Total and Fruitful. Yes I have heard of NFP! We talk about it as one of the options in our video about birth control! ❤️❤️

[@cbentler4528]

Tiffany Dawn thanks for responding. I can’t take credit for the phrase though. I think it was Pope John Paul 2.

[@pbennett13]

I’ll say this... you two are bold taking these subjects on... I applaud you for that... my only call out is on this assumption on public hair and that it’s mostly associated with porn watching. I think it’s sloppy.. cultures all over the world have practiced pubic shaving way before porn became popular. With Muslims, it’s a practice for men and women - and many of them find porn as abominable as Christians do. There’s no prohibition in the Bible against it and many women are for it even before sex and marriage for practical reasons - e.g. cleaner, especially during menstration cycle, panty/bikini lines, odor, etc. And some women are shaved when giving birth. Not saying it may not have some impact, but only because it’s actually seen. They say ignorance is bliss but that’s not always true.. ignorance is just ignorance. As to the comments here, it just goes to show some are judaizers looking to impose their ceremonial laws on others.. but the Council in Jerusalem (Acts 15) was supposed to address that. But keep doing your thing... you can’t please everyone 😊

[@rhemasingh5579]

Wow.......... james gave all the answers being so comfortable and calm.

[@TiffanyDawn]

Right?? He's so great 😍

[@tj9801]

Porn is not just toxic, but watching it is in disobedience to God. If a man I’m in love w has an active porn usage, we will not enter marriage with him engaging in that sin and believing it’s ok. Nope!

[@threestars2164]

Access to such products is a human right!

[@kennethfok]

Porn turns a man into a sex monster and he might actually hurt the woman more than give her pleasure.

[@kaylag9579]

I don't recommend women going on birth control. I just have seen that the side effects arent really talked about and our bodies already beautifully work why wreck that? Also the hormone imbalance, the chance of stroke which I have had friends have. Its just more common than we think. My husband and I didnt want to get pregnant right away so we used condoms. They work and my friends who want to wait 4 years they use condoms and they work. Yes there is a chance that it may not work but if God really wants you to have a child he will make it happen regardless of the protection you use. I have a girl friend who was on the pill and using condoms and she got pregnant because they both failed. So take precaution but know the side effects of the hormonal birth controls. There is also the non hormonal birth control as well... female condom, sponge, cervical cap, diaphragm, I tend to recommend these over the hormonal ones. There is also natural family planning that works for some people as well.

[@TiffanyDawn]

Thank you for sharing this! Yes, I found that the hormones of the pill were just not what I wanted and really messed with my body, so I went off of that too and started just using condoms. It's so good to know all the options and consider all these different factors, and how they'll affect our bodies!

[@Kaibigan39]

I'm reading Dr. Briden's The Period Repair Manual. It explains what unaltered fertility looks like, talks about hormones, all forms of birth control-both barrier and hormonal- and the damage that hormonal bc does to your body (and how to fix it). Highly recommended for every bride. Get to know yourself and get educated on your options.

[@agentorange153]

Some couples cannot use condoms, however, because they're in the way too much (as is the case for me), and the same applies for other barrier methods -- but if it works for you, then feel free to use it!

[@kaylag9579]

agentorange153 could be a sizing issue...

[@agentorange153]

@@kaylag9579 That is a possibility -- a major problem I had with my ex (with whom I am still friends) was that she was just too loose down there, and it didn't feel like much at all even without a condom (although that one time when she deliberately squeezed, I felt it all right)! All the same, though, I'm pretty sure that the lack of direct friction contributed as well! (As a matter of fact, she didn't want to use any cervical barriers for a different, but similar, reason -- she liked to be poked in the cervix, and any kind of barriers up there would be in the way!)

[@nicolevx7267]

If you shave with a razor but on aloe vera gel right afterwards and you won’t get razor bumps

[@TiffanyDawn]

Oh wow!! I never knew that! Thank you!!

[@nanostar7660]

1:06-Intended for Pleasure Book

[@hannaj9534]

Such a great video!🧡

[@TiffanyDawn]

Oh yay!! Thank you!!

[@amandabrown7280]

I love you Tiffany Dawn❤️

[@TiffanyDawn]

Awwww thank you!!! Much love back to you! ❤️❤️❤️

[@susanwright6168]

I want to thank you and James for being willing to be as honest and transparent as you are about such a personal topic (while also keeping it sacred and classy). It means a lot that you would share that with us so we could feel a little less fearful/unsure/insecure. It really is such a beautiful ministry that you provide. You both have been pouring into my spiritual growth for years now. Thank you!

[@TiffanyDawn]

Awwww!!! Susan, your comment made my day!! Thank you!! 🤗🤗

[@alyzak.8997]

I am so grateful for your videos. They are SO informative and helpful. Thank you!!

[@TiffanyDawn]

I’m so glad!! That makes me so happy! 🙌

[@Hey_Ruthie]

Before I watch the video, I love how you love talking about sex. LOL. It is God’s gift meant to be enjoyed at the right season. I look forward to building intimacy with my future husband, wherever he is. Haha.

[@TiffanyDawn]

Yes!! Exactly!! 🙌🙌

[@misswinnie4.8]

You are both helping me. Thank you,