Well Scares Your Problem | Episode 44: Ghost Ships

should be "undead utility vessel", realized this after the fact
"dinghy of the damned" is also good
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00:00 THIS IS A PODCAST
00:00:09 INTRO / PRONOUNS
00:02:30 TOPIC TEASE
00:04:14 GOD DAMN NEWS #1
00:11:38 GOD DAMN NEWS #2
00:13:36 MAIN TOPIC: GHOST SHIPS
00:13:42 The Carol A. Dearing
00:17:23 Carol A. Dearing - Final Voyage
00:26:38 Carol A. Dearing - Theories
00:32:46 Carol A. Dearing - Discussion of Theories
00:34:45 The Mary Celeste
00:40:36 Mary Celeste - Final Voyage
00:49:40 Mary Celeste - Theories
00:59:06 INTERMISSION
01:02:44 MV Joyita
01:04:13 MV Joyita - Final Voyage
01:10:05 MV Joyita - Theories
01:15:42 OUTRO
01:15:59 SAFETY THIRD
01:27:48 NEXT EPISODE / COMMERCIALS

[@fingerless6568]

"Malice" Caldwell-Kelly was RIGHT THERE

[@gelatinocyte6270]

Malice Caldwell-Scary

[@weatheranddarkness]

@@gelatinocyte6270 Malice Coldwell-Skellington

[@birkobird]

Congrats on getting this in the next podcast mate

[@PFMediaServices]

Well these are all going into the captions if I can manage to make them fit.

[@nowhereman6019]

"October" Caldwell-Kelly

[@pineapplepizza27]

My pronouns are ruh/roh

[@DistractedGlobeGuy]

I feel more like a Zoinks/Fuck these days.

[@GoredonTheDestroyer]

Oh/No

[@Frisco1355]

Well/Shit

[@lansonp]

Ra/gy

[@OpreRoma]

My pronouns are *screaming* This works when it isn't Halloween too

[@nerowulfee9210]

My pronouns are [gachi screams]

[@StonerWaifu]

My pronouns are "Wilmhelm" and "Howie"

[@syystomu]

Mood, Contrabanned

[@dr.velious5411]

I personally identify as N'lrgbvn Fhngnafan.

[@GoredonTheDestroyer]

My pronouns, in physicality, are He/Him. Spiritually, they are *_Blood Curdling Scream A/Blood Curdling Scream B._*

[@AlexanderWulff]

I think “Alice Caldwell-Skelly” was a missed opportunity there. Happy Halloween 🎃

[@katie1921]

Malice Caldwell-Skelly

[@drakinkoren]

oooOOOOOooold Man Anderson? 😅

[@gelatinocyte6270]

Is ”scary” better?

[@justinokraski3796]

dead man anderson?

[@OkSharkey]

@@katie1921 malice ghoul-hell skelly

[@Anonarchist]

Oh my god you guys... You're: *Justscream Maniac* *Aaahlice Coldgrave-Killy* *Killem Allerson* You're welcome.

[@pineapplepizza27]

You clearly have watched all of the treehouse of horror credit sequences

[@Anonarchist]

Well, they just keep making them!

[@Jinrokh]

The last one also works for a Metallica-themed episode

[@brentdalebroux2821]

Liam obviously takes inspiration from Tomino.

[@russianbot8576]

omfg these are goooood

[@ukaszgolon5617]

The haunted house of Theseus is one of the topics of study at the Institute of Advanced Hauntology.

[@DarkExcalibur42]

I need to sign up for some classes there!

[@AbsolXGuardian]

Due to a labeling mixup, the Institute of Advanced Hauntology is studying both how ideas linger and how that manifests in a society, and ghosts.

[@MyChannel773]

@@AbsolXGuardian with some additional courses teaching said ghosts how to properly haunt

[@MrJstorm4]

​@@MyChannel773 on a philosophical level the two fields are actually intimittily connected. Both fields seek to answer the question of how the past shapes the present. Hauntology looks at the past through dreams, and that infrastructure built to pasilitate them. Spectroloy does so by examining folks who cannot interact with the outside world, and therefore, can't be tainted by modernity.

[@TheEnoEtile]

There may now be nothing in this world I want more than to see a sovereign citizen in an actual admiralty court.

[@danielkorladis7869]

I would buy that on pay per view

[@weatheranddarkness]

I for one want to see the movie of the Joyita, the one where every passenger has a dark secret but they are all different dark secrets, oh and the bread fungus hallucinations.

[@plateoshrimp9685]

Photography nerd here. Actually jpeg compression wasn’t in common use till the 40’s, so that photo would likely have been a bmp file. The run length encoding (RLE) used in the bmp format limited photo-telegram resolution to 640x480, but was easier to compute by hand. Little known fact, William Reginald Jpeg invented the format in 1938 as part of an IBM contract with the NAZIs.

[@ClaudiaNW]

Of course BMP files were invented in 1903 by the German engineer and balloonist Wilhelm von Bittmapp. But in the Anglophone world the spelling was changed to "bitmap" in 1917 for patriotic reasons.

[@DJ-Sellout]

Don't forget when the brothers Pogo and Nevile Goodtrein invented the .png file, after which they successfully sued all other formats out of business. This is why it is sometimes referred to as 'lossless compression.'

[@ClaudiaNW]

@@DJ-Sellout Ah yes. Pogo was a true polymath with business interests in many fields. In addition to his achievements in graphics, he served as Chairman of the London and North Eastern Railway before its nationalisation, and was briefly Chairman of the British Railways Board under the Macmillan government. The term "goods train" is named for him (as Alice said, they were previously known as "motorised rollingums"), as is the traditional proverb "train good, car bad".

[@colonelgraff9198]

The original compression algorithm, GIF, was invented by the Romans, specifically General Ignatius Flavius (after whom GIF is named). He used this to send pictures of war plans to the Senate when Hannibal invaded Rome. After the war, GIFs were used as a basis for the tile frescoes used on the brothels throughout Rome, becoming the first compressed file format for porn.

[@scarylion1roar]

@@colonelgraff9198 His first name was Generalis?

[@dylanchouinard6141]

It’s only a Communist Revolution if it comes from the Revol region of France, otherwise it’s just sparkling mutiny. Edit also: “What happened to that yacht?” “Operation Gladio?” “Operation Gladio? At this point in time? In this part of the world? Localized entirely within your boat?” “Yes!” “May I see it?” “No!”

[@uilsoum875]

i thought the episode about ghost ships wouldn't have any communism and i am extremely pleased to find out i was wrong

[@CommieGIR]

Admiral: "Hey, you guys are back early" Sailors: "Bermuda's Communist" Admiral: "What?" Sailors: *lifts AK* "Revolution in the Bermuda"

[@johncogswell2890]

Also Sailors: Look at me, I'm the Admiral now.

[@stupititykills]

RE: Distributing Ghosts via disassembling the haunted house: During WW2 there was a B-24 named Lady Be Good which crashed in North Africa after the crew made a navigational error. While the wreck itself was mostly-intact, the crew all died on account of being 200 miles from the nearest settlement. After the crash was re-discovered in the fifties, and the investigation concluded, many of the still-working components were reused in other aircraft, which had spooky and dangerous happenings occur, culminating with an Otter which received an armrest crashing into the Gulf of Sindra and leaving no trace of any of the passengers, save for the armrest from Lady Be Good.

[@francistheodorecatte]

side note, there's a good song featuring Lady Be Good, that being Permanent by Seeming off their album The Birdwatcher's Guide To Atrocity. recommend giving it a listen...

[@SImrobert2001]

"You really think we should use these parts we got from a creepy ghost bomber filled with the energy of the angry dead? It seems like we should order new." "Look, lets just do it and spend the money we saved on whores and cocaine." "We saved like $40." "$40 is $40. And its $40 more of whores and cocaine than we have now." "That is fair."

[@cristizagan8232]

"I can't belive all these aircraft made out the remains of wrecks that spent a decade in the desert keep crashing. One of them must be haunted."

[@tompain9735]

9/11 steel being reused in navy vessels and buildings another potential datum for Distributed Ghost Theory.

[@RappinPicard]

That kinda reminds me of some documentary I remember as a kid about these people who found an old WW2 bomber on ice somewhere and they tried to repair it and get it flying again, only it just immediately caught fire and sank into the ice.

[@rebeccatrishel]

I like that Justin can say "Yes" in a way that sounds like "Shut up."

[@nerdywolverine8640]

"i have already implied all this and am going to continue now."

[@Kandosii]

A friend of the family once commandeered a ghost ship when she was a child, and screwed over some rich people in the process. Decades ago, there was a massive storm surge one night that pushed into the river mouth where some fancy yachts were being stored for the off-season, ripping them loose. Her dad sensed an opportunity, of the kind mentioned in this episode with the Mary Celeste: If you steal a boat while someone's on it, it's piracy. If you steal a boat that's abandoned, that's salvage. You just have to keep someone on board to say "yep i found it this is mine right now". So he rowed her out to one of the boats and dropped her off there while he went to corral as many yachts as he could. She stayed out there for half a day, acting as a human paperweight. They basically ransomed the yachts back to the rich people, and were entirely within legal rights to do so.

[@DeathbyButterflies1]

that's awesome. i love it omg

[@Kandosii]

@@DeathbyButterflies1 and I love your screen name. Same hat!

[@DeathbyButterflies1]

@@Kandosii omg thank you!

[@synthgal1090]

Great story, great name, great gender

[@GoredonTheDestroyer]

That is fucking _genius._

[@mmtunligit]

now I want WTYP plays return of the obra dinn. "oh it looks like he's been exploded" "I don't think that's OSHA-complaint"

[@kazmark_gl8652]

I would up my Patreon contribution to 50 a month for an entire year if they produced that exact video

[@willmiles7978]

I never knew I could want something so much.

[@melpomeneb-smith3955]

fuck actually yes i would kill for this

[@truegopnik6591]

A specter is haunting my house, it’s the specter of the friendly ghost.

[@redbasher636]

Unnerving Utility Vessel

[@IslandHermit]

Kudos to Alice for "the haunted house of Theseus".

[@OpreRoma]

Hell, Scares Your Goblin, featuring Ghostbustin' Wozniak, Alice Skulldwell Kelly, and Liam Wicker Mandersen

[@DeadWhiteButterflies]

You should've made it Mandleson 😂

[@genuinecorncob5861]

"jpeg compression by hand" is a great bit

[@EmissaryofWind]

"What's a scary word that starts with 'U'?" "Uterus?" sounds about right

[@prjndigo]

... terrifying triemes, yikes yatchs, tremulous tankers...

[@deeznoots6241]

Frightening Frigates/Ferries, Chilling Clippers, Terrible Tugboats, Bloody Barges, Wailing Whalers

[@phillipsiebold8351]

@@deeznoots6241 Crying Carrack, Looming Longboat, oracle coracle

[@jiriz0r]

Eerie East Indiaman, Malicious Man-o’-war, Cadaverous Corvette, Dreadful Dreadnought

[@alexroselle]

Beastly Barques, Scary Skiffs, Wailing Whalers, Caravels of Carnage, Brigs o'Doom

[@horacioestabridis1628]

Devish Dhows, Freaky Fluyts, Brutal Baghlahs

[@doctorworm420]

The way Rozc says Mary-Celeste is the same way my boyfriend says Reese's Pieces and something about that makes me go absolutely feral.

[@Yora21]

Reesee Peesees?

[@drakinkoren]

Joyita: If the captain is incapacitated and unable to tell people that the ship isn't going to sink, the passengers would maybe resort to throwing the cargo overboard to lighten the boat. If water levels continued to rise... They abandon ship in the lifeboat.

[@robin8404]

I was thinking this. Like, especially if the first mate wasn't around as well, cos him and the captain, I dunno, shot each other or beat the shit out of each other or something, I dunno how many other people would've known she was basically unsinkable and that chucking cargo overboard wasn't necessary (or helpful, ground-up coconut can't be that dense)

[@sirrliv]

Same thought here too. Only alternative is that they run into a storm and part of the cargo is washed overboard. Might've also been what busted the pipe and blew out the one remaining engine.

[@unicorn4031]

The Joyita could also have been hit by a rogue wave with similar results. The captain and at least some of the crew may have been washed overboard. It would explain some of the damage on the boat.

[@Liliarthan]

That's what came to mind for me. The people that knew it was unsinkable were dead. I would dump the cargo too. Then it listed so much that they freaked out and left on a life boat, then got swallowed by the resident Kraken in the communist Bermuda triangle.

[@GaldirEonai]

My first thought was "those four missing tons of cargo weren't actually copra, they were smuggling something."

[@allisonstilley9536]

Pixel mining has improved greatly over the last 100 years.

[@cmarano]

We're past pixel mining these days. In order to reduce our carbon footprint we're using pixel recycling. Now you know why you see the same Memes over and over.

[@allisonstilley9536]

@cmarano Is this the reason for the deep fried memes? Are we also reusing pixels cannablized from old and unused memes on the new ones? If so, that's also progress.

[@pineapplepizza27]

I was driving Uber IN MOUNTVILLE, PA today dressed as a banana... I had no idea there was a hostage situation earlier. No wonder people weren't cheery about my halloween costume

[@slaughterround643]

why do bananas invoke hostage situations?

[@gobarn1877]

@@slaughterround643 have you never seen a banana gun?!

[@TrashHeapCustodian]

I knew in my heart of hearts that Alice would have something to say about sounding rods as soon as Justin said it Ah, never change

[@AlanCanon2222]

Wanted to give a shout-out to Liam, who says the things I wish I were brave enough to say, morally, but Liam says it better, in the two-pronged fashion of making fun of terrible regulations and structures, but also his advocacy for LGBTQ. I'm one of those allies like Liam, but Liam always says it better and more incisively. Love Roz and Alice too. You all keep it "real" because there's nothing more fake than trust in a bad design or a bad idea. Also, thanks to Liam and Roz by proxy for being Philadelphians. We've been watching what you did to defeat Trump. Go Eagles. And love to the "Well There's Your Problem Podcast", all around. May your designs never fail.

[@welltheresyourproblempodca1465]

Thank you.

[@AlanCanon2222]

@@welltheresyourproblempodca1465 It's my honor. Love from Louisville, home of the first Fink Truss bridge crossing of the Ohio River, I want to say 1879, and perhaps the first large scale Fink Truss bridge. It never collapsed so you can't do it on your show: parts of it still carry CSX trains. And also home to a damned sight bunch of LGBTQ folks and their natural straight allies.

[@welltheresyourproblempodca1465]

Louisville rules. Got the state of Kentucky tattooed on my calf there.

[@AlanCanon2222]

@@welltheresyourproblempodca1465 Edwin Hubble did live and teach here in 1913. His dad died just after Hubble graduated in England. Hubble hadn't grown up here, but his parents moved from Chicago (Evanston) to Louisville so that Hubble's younger sisters could grow up in a small town. They were living on Brook Street in Old Louisville when Old Man Hubble died, but when Edwin and his brother moved to Louisville to take care of the family, they moved to the Highlands, and I bicycle past the place all the time: the alleys are still cobblestone. Hubble commuted each day (rails good, cars bad) over the K&I Bridge to New Albany, Indiana (just across the river). In his one year of teaching at New Albany, Edwin taught science but also basketball. He coached the New Albany High School Basketball team through a 12-0 season, and they finished third in the state championships in Indianapolis. The 1913 New Albany High School yearbook is dedicated to him. I know a few things about who he was interested in romantically that year but it might be too soon. We just got the John Castleman statue vandalized enough to get it removed from display from the area (a Confederate figure): In the realm of engineering and art, there are those of us who would have the Castleman Statue melted down and turned into a figure of Edwin Hubble, not the future founder of modern cosmology, but a poor schoolteacher walking to catch the electric streetcar down Bardstown Road to the station where he would catch the Louisville to Indiana light rail. Train good, car bad.

[@midgetwthahacksaw]

​@@AlanCanon2222A big 'How ta doin'? ' from another Louisvillian! Glad to see some Kentucky representation in the comments! Can atest to the big LGBTQ+ population and proud to be a member of it! Good ta see ya!

[@Jungleshoes]

A cool ghost ship is the SS Baychimo. It got stuck in ice and abandoned in 1931, and for nearly 40 years it would get spotted stuck in ice or floating in different locations as it would thaw, drift around and get stuck again. Last sighting was 1969.

[@kjj26k]

By far and away the most literal ghost ship I have ever heard of. Fuuuuuuuu-that!

[@Fullchristainname]

It keeps showing up when people need shelter, so if it’s a ghost ship it’s a friendly ghost ship.

[@LB1973]

Problem with the Baychimo is that there is no real mystery the crew all survived iirc

[@Dong_Harvey]

@@LB1973 what about the penguin crew?

[@melpomeneb-smith3955]

A recreation was done for channel 5, which concluded that the alcohol and crew had all been stolen away by mischievous Gypsies, and called for the government to bring in new anti-trespassing measures to preserve boat prices in the Bermuda Triangle

[@alexanderhalladay3662]

It turns out what you do with a drunken sailor ea-rly in the mornin' is unionizing them, who knew

[@trubass23]

I was about to correct you for misspelling deionising, but unionising has a completely different meaning and etymology, despite being nearly identical words. English is a silly language

[@albertovillaescusarico9456]

The words "Our operational risk assessment allows for some worker casualties" will haunt me for a long time.

[@Derrick_Campana]

Trains good Cars bad Ghost Ships an eldrich morality the human mind is incapable of understanding and any attempt to do so leads to irreversible insanity. Goats chaotic neutral

[@Kuhmuhnistische_Partei]

And Ghoasts? You know, like ghosty goats?

[@joshuahadams]

I mean, _The Call of Cthulhu_ has that as it’s main section, after the racist bit about a Louisianan Old One cult and mild rambling about a similar Greenlandic one.

[@PugandOwn]

I appreciate alice also thinking of the wrong type of sounding rod. I feel less like a lonely pervert now.

[@CorbinSimpson]

Obligatory JPEG comment: At the time the photo was taken, folks had been using the FFT, a relative of JPEG's DCT, to do astronomical calculations. They could have simulated DCT with transparent films which are darkened with wavelets; layering several dozen of those films would have produced a B&W image. The missing pieces were all mathematical; DCT in JPEG is often joked to be alien technology from the future which we were lucky to discover.

[@loafersglory]

My theory on the Joyita: They hit bad weather, causing the ship to pitch and rattle about. Hearing the 4 tonnes of coconut shells clip clopping about, and believing themselves to be on the receiving end of a heavy cavalry charge, all hands abandoned ship.

[@ebnertra0004]

An astronomical number of coconut bonks were heard by the crew, sparking panic

[@trashrabbit69]

"Ethereal Junk" is my favorite ghost ship, also probably someone's high school nickname, but I ain't guessing who.

[@spacedonut8157]

I tried telling my girlfriend my "Etherial Junk" was going to haunt her tonight, but then I remembered I don't have a girlfriend, and was told "I need you to leave or I will have to call the police."

[@Kaanfight]

Space Donut personally I just like the idea of you Jedi mind tricking someone into saying “I need to leave or I will call the police”

[@satelliteexile2089]

Pretty sure it was my buddy's nickname. Dude got circumcised due to a zipper-related incident and kept texting everyone about not bein able to feel his dick once the locals kicked in.

[@Sondoire]

Scre-am Anderson

[@samchem1577]

Liam Damned-erson

[@bynrdskynrd]

@@samchem1577 more clever than mine

[@ClaudiaNW]

They really are a scre-am The podcast family.

[@chancekahle2214]

Every single Denny's is haunted, Alice.

[@alicecaldwell-kelly9530]

yeah but just haunted by failure instead of the paranormal

[@dylanchouinard6141]

I mean, Denny is a shorter form of Dionysus

[@therugburnz]

Haunted by bad waitresses

[@icyjiub2228]

Just imagining a ton of people doing the Discrete Cosine Transforms in Jpeg compression by hand.

[@AlanCanon2222]

39:44 Alice mentions "nominative determinism", which is a favorite theme in my other favorite podcast, "No Such Thing as a Fish". My own personal favorite example of ND is Oliver Smoot, who had a unit of measurement named for him (after the MIT fraternity he pledged forced the young members to measure the Harvard Bridge using him as a human yardstick). So his name acquired the status of a named standard of measurement, which it didn't have when he acquired the name, and THEN he became director of ANSI and ISO.

[@HarryS77]

I know a luthier named Waylin Carpenter.

[@diegorivera6531]

They keep repainting the smoot lines on Mass ave bridge, but there's no plaque to explain it. Gotta get ANSI on that... Or the WTYP direct action committee... That Smoot became a standards guy is a wild tidbit never heard about, thanks!

[@dahavid]

Justin's minesweeper joke is a winner.

[@Alex-cw3rz]

1:00:40 I'm upset Alice didn't mention the fact that Princess Anne did a backward somersault into the road, to escape the kidnapper

[@alicecaldwell-kelly9530]

they don't like admitting that they teach the royals gunkata

[@Sylvie_without_surname]

If the Bermuda Triangle sinks you after you already passed through, that's what we call spooky action at a distance.

[@cmarano]

I would definitely watch "Well There's Your Problem Test Kitchen". (First 30 minutes would be Alice, Justin, and Liam arguing about aprons)

[@Anarchy_Shark]

Liam is correct I am in fact paying you for boat puns

[@zimmerwald1915]

5:28 Alice, what you have to remember is that America is neither a democratic nor a civilized country.

[@HarryS77]

But it is a country...!

[@eddlake5694]

@@HarryS77 for now

[@xalrath]

@@HarryS77 but is it a society

[@HarryS77]

@@xalrath There is no society; only individuals! Oh wait, that's England.

[@ClaudiaNW]

Neither is Britain. Trust me. I live here. We are ruled by Boris, our national dish is beans on toast, and everything looks like shit. Also TERFs.

[@mechtechpotato4249]

The captain of that container ship: PHIL SWIFT I cut this minesweeper in half

[@Azivegu]

From the wikipedia page of Frederickk Solly-Flood: Flood was described by a historian of the Mary Celeste affair as a man "whose arrogance and pomposity were inversely proportional to his IQ" and as "... the sort of man who, once he had made up his mind about something, couldn't be shifted."

[@Theoddert]

The delayed-reaction-bermuda-triangle for some reason conjures the image of that clip from Hitman where he throws a suitcase and it fly's horizontally, chases a dude on a jet ski for 5 minutes, killing him when he eventually stops

[@memelord1337]

10:52 " *Absolutely don't call the cops* -if someone is in a mental health crisis- "

[@bluntcabbage6042]

Even during those big bad mass shootings everyone's harping on about?

[@slaughterround643]

just never call the cops

[@kjj26k]

@@bluntcabbage6042 The Good Guy with a Gun™ will take care of it.

[@bluntcabbage6042]

@@kjj26k It's funny you say that, because 95% of the people I see crying "Defund the police!" are the same ones wanting near or total disarmament of the people.

[@MrxstGrssmnstMttckstPhlNelThot]

@@bluntcabbage6042 well those ain't leftists. This is a socialist podcast, comrade. You won't hear advocacy for complete disarmament of folks here. We need that shit for the revolution.

[@wn9500]

Liam’s drunk captain impression around 40:05 is quite possibly the funniest thing I’ve ever heard a human do

[@justinokraski3796]

"Umbral" could potentially work for the Unterseeboat

[@davidhoran7116]

Wight-Warship was slept on but got a whole belly laugh out of me well done Alice

[@chrisweston6908]

If the crew all escape in lifeboats, but then die/drown in rough seas, do the ghosts haunt the lifeboats or revert back to the original vessel?

[@BoraHorzaGobuchul]

Must be range-dependent

[@tysonwilkins2537]

hear me out: ghost-bustin' roczniak (i know it's bad sorry)

[@henrycurtis3652]

now that its November ghosts aren't all he's bustin

[@ruddygreat4914]

Alice Caldwell-SCAREy

[@Benu54321]

Alice CaldHELL-SCAREy

[@splooie02]

Alice-ster Caldwell-Crowley

[@christinabalser3344]

@@splooie02 Malice Caldhell-Skelly?

[@pmcgee003]

When I was about 12, and of course had books about the Bermuda Triangle, and the Mary Celeste, it was sold as "found drifting, with a meal on the table, as if interrupted part way through. Nothing disturbed. But no people."

[@ciceronincheese7195]

30:54 Sorry, but in the hobgoblin translation of the Communist Manifesto, it says "stalks throughout Europe." Haunting was not introduced as the verb until they changed the subject to 'specter.' I'll shut up sorry to bother.

[@shindenfighter3303]

Lance do Boju? Lol

[@theoneandonlymichaelmccormick]

When the Mary Celeste came up I audibly shouted “YEAH!!” purely out of love for Limbo of the Lost.

[@opiuy8]

same

[@theoneandonlymichaelmccormick]

@@opiuy8 There are dozens of us.

[@RatchetSly]

Between this, Philosophy Tube's new video about the Supreme Court, B-Mask's Scooby-Doo video, the first proper Helluva Boss episode, the new Mystery Skulls Animated, and Sarah Z's new video, tonight's been a supremely good night for stuff I need to watch. Just started listening to the podcast - hope you guys had a good Halloween!

[@Copyright_Infringement]

Wait, there's a Helluva Boss episode now? Is there a Hazbin yet?

[@RatchetSly]

@@Copyright_Infringement Hazbin Hotel is gonna be released as a full season on TV, from what I recall, since A24 is their producer for that series - Helluva Boss, however, is being released into KZbin as the team finishes episodes, since it's remaining an independent project! The first episode of season 1 was posted on Vivzie's channel on Halloween.

[@ellewilliams5162]

The talk about engineers in the safety third segment reminds me of this one incident when I used to work in a feed mill. So we had this grain elevator which was a vertical bucket system which was used to transfer grain from an intake and deposit it into silos. So occasionally the intake would overspill because as we know everything leaks, and it was my job to move the grain from an area adjacent to the intake which was referred to as ‘the pit.’ The quickest and easiest way to do this was to remove a hatch on the grain elevator and shovel the grain directly into it. This isn’t normally an issue, however on this one occasion a site engineer had removed the the ladders which was used to access this area, so I was essentially trapped in the pit with the only way out being to put my foot onto a very thin ledge which was only a few centimetres wide just above the the opening to these very fast rotating spinning buckets of death. The engineer had also removed the panel, and it was outside of the pit leaving me no over option but to put myself in this situation when I was a slip away from ending up being dragged up a grain elevator/being turned into chunks.

[@DetectiveMekova]

There was a car accident on friday on this bridge I cross omw home from work every night. Police cars parked behind the line of civilians. I thought "Oh, they're just directing traffic." Nope. This police woman starts going car to car, checking peoples registrations and inspection stickers. I swear to god. I was right next to a Subaru who was forced to BLOCK TRAFFIC ON A REALLY HIGH BRIDGE just so that some class traitor can write them a citation so that she can meet her quota. Some dude behind me also was pulled over as well. You can't make this shit up. 1312

[@BoraHorzaGobuchul]

Tangentially related: back in the nineties, I was once waiting for my train at one of Moscow's railroad stations. It was late night, and I had a few hours to kill, so I went to the appropriately naming Waiting Hall where you could take a seat and, well, wait. There were a few policemen patrolling the hall for some reason. Also for some reason, they used their shock batons to electrically wake up any individual that decided that sleeping was a good way to spend the time until their train arrived. One might argue it was a process intended to discourage hobos from sleeping there, however, I can assure you no hobos used to wear a three-piece suit with a silk tie, which did not protect me against a shocking awakening. Very refreshing, much more efficient than a cup of Joe.

[@DigitalPhotoEssay]

Really enjoying this window into pre-civil war America

[@WaterMan416]

I do that by looking out my window.

[@tedschilling3223]

@@WaterMan416 from a

[@herpmcderp7666]

Ghastly Galleon, Boogie Barque, Demonic Dhow, Wendigo Windjammer, Deadly Destroyer, Spooky Submarine EDIT: Also, sailing ships most certainly had electric generators and lighting by the 1900's and later. The U.S.S. Jeanette was fitted with electric generators and lighting in the 1870's, for a polar expedition that ended in complete disaster

[@tompain9735]

Only thing scarier is ghost trains. There’s a video on this site of ghost hunters looking for the wreck of 1856 haunting the train tracks in Ambler, PA and thinking that the northbound SEPTA Doylestown Line is a fucking ghost train.

[@splooie02]

There's a few good ghost train SCPs

[@tompain9735]

@@splooie02 legit used to be afraid of the pic of Lincoln’s funeral train as a kid

[@sc149]

I mean it IS a ghost train but its a different ghost train and still in service so it dont count

[@slaughterround643]

shout out to boring british ghost trains, which are trains that run from one station to another and back once a week at 5am to fulfil a technicality in a contract

[@stanislavkostarnov2157]

oil lamps can last for days (if this is the case, probably what was used was an oil wick lantern, they are dim, but can be seen far away on a dark night)…. the other possibility is a tared light rope (they had 30, 60, & 100 hour ropes on most British Merchant vessels)

[@flyingskier1913]

Haven’t watched it yet but it seems cool.

[@GoredonTheDestroyer]

Other synonym for ghost ship, that I'm surprised neither Justin, Alice, nor Liam came up with: _Creepy Corvette._ Edit: God damn it, I just thought of _Dire Dreadnought,_ _Alarming Aircraft Carrier,_ _Fearsome Five-Mast,_ and _Terrifying Trireme._

[@prjndigo]

Joyita: Wrap the engine with matresses to start a fire since it won't sink. I would bet it was 3.5 tons of something highly illegal and a half ton of coconut shells. Captain killed makes sense. Engine wouldn't start because the batteries were screwed and releasing chlorine gas as well. Anyone with 5 minutes of training on a radio would have noticed a break in the antenna wire.

[@Amadeus_Phoenix]

Minor correction that there's no helipad on the Hunt class, the stern area is used for handling various pieces of mine countermeasure equipment. But it's good to see some traction for that story outside of warship nerd circles, definitely going to be interesting to see the results of the inevitable investigation. Glad there weren't any more serious injuries.

[@alicecaldwell-kelly9530]

anything's a helipad if your pilot is dumb enough

[@Amadeus_Phoenix]

@@alicecaldwell-kelly9530 yes but generally only once

[@Dong_Harvey]

I can't understand the at something which is loaded with detection equipment couldn't be a little more careful about its surrounding.. But then again, only so much of the cargo ship is underwater

[@FuriousApples]

"Frightening Frigates" would have been a good one

[@FuriousApples]

Also "daunting dreadnoughts"

[@vicedrn]

If you guys ever make t-shirts, make some "Pennsylvania Secret Service" ones. That detail has stuck with me since that episode.

[@storeswallah]

Living in a seaport, I trip over old brass nautical oil lamps all the damn time. It's a hugely ironic hazard.

[@jacebeleren9290]

"Mary Celeste was found alone, the fate of her crew is still unknown. Murder, fraud, or acts bizarre, no-one can say but chances are they're down, downed and drowned, downed and drowned and never found." -The Longest Johns, Downed and Drowned, from Smoke and Oakum (2022), also the same Longest Johns who performed Hoist Up the Thing, which I assume Alice was referencing at one point

[@Jennralize]

FYI the dilution solution doesn't work on homeopathic ghost ships.

[@RedHotMessResell]

The SpongeBob references always get me. “You’re good. You’re good. Eh… we can buff out those scratches.” 😂😂

[@thomasgray4188]

Disappearing Dreadnoghts I'm pretty sure a Brazilian Dreadnoght actually disappeared too. Also my Mary Celeste theory is the Succ Cloud (all tornadoes and waterspouts will be named as such henceforth) came and Sucked the crew of the ship

[@joshuahadams]

Googled it. In 1951 _São Paulo_ was being towed from Rio de Janiero to the UK for ship breaking and was lost in a gale near the Azores when the tow cables snapped. She and her sister ship, _Minas Geraes,_ were built by Vickers in the UK in 1909. They were the centre of a revolt in 1910, Brazilian sailors were sick of being lashed and mutinied. Many of the crew were either former slaves or the sons of slaves who were press-ganged into naval service. Eventually their demands were met, the mutineers pardoned, and the ships returned to normal service.

[@Gnome075]

This podcast is a gift from the great pumpkin

[@effluviah7544]

Oh fuck yeah. My pronouns are were/wolf, my credentials are being the subject of a Warren Zevon song. Let's gooooo 🎃

[@Havlock]

1:10:25 "But that doesn't account for the missing cargo. Why are they missing four tons of cargo?": In my mind, the best explanation for this is they threw the cargo overboard after they discovered they were taking on substantial water (and couldn't stop it) to lessen the weight of the ship so it'd float better. That seems like a reasonable explanation to me.

[@jgmm26]

finally, the tacoma scarrows bridge

[@Randomstuffs261]

Dammit, I was expecting the Tacoma Narrows Bridge episode

[@Randomstuffs261]

@ThisIsMyRealName I could have sworn they've said it'd be the next episode for several episodes in a row now

[@pokeguy742]

@@Randomstuffs261 tomorrow for sure

[@devinfaux6987]

That'll be April Fool's Day.

[@tompain9735]

$15k tier patrons have it already.

[@HarryS77]

@@pokeguy742 Definitely right after the WTC7 episode.

[@plateoshrimp9685]

One thing I have to dispute here. Most engineers are just nerds who sit at computers all day, and will probably die in a normal way, like a Tesla fire.

[@stanislavkostarnov2157]

for the case of the Jotita, it is possible that the coconuts shells were used to somehow build a coffin for the captain....

[@Dong_Harvey]

The Gilligan special for you Skipper!

[@helpme5785]

That coconut yacht one: maybe they dumped the coconut cause they were worried about sinking or something? But when it kept listing or didn't stop or whatever they decided to leave

[@feelingveryattackedrn5750]

Proving that the left is funnier than the right once again, even regarding pronouns jokes. Mine woulda been oof/ouch/mybones

[@BakingAndGhibli]

There was a children’s book I read once where a lady would gather haunted pieces of houses together so that the ghosts could hang out with other ghosts. Can’t for the life of me remember the name.

[@jakejackson3795]

There's actually a computer game called 'Limbo of the Lost' which has Benjamin Briggs of the Mary Celeste wander around Limbo in a point-and-click adventure. You probably cant find copies of it because the game just straight-up ripped assets from literally every other game in existence.

[@Datdus92]

Alice is hilarious. lmao. I lost it at the horn.

[@Shannon_Lynch]

Most episodes Alice's jokes are a mix of stuff that really makes me laugh and stuff that I find to be super lame. This episode she consistently made me laugh out loud.

[@alicecaldwell-kelly9530]

batting .500 babyyyyyyyyyy

[@chippedchap4124]

Eerie Ekranoplan Anomalous Autonomous-Spaceport-Drone-Ship Deathly DUKW Scary Small-Waterplane-Area-Twin-Hulled-Ship

[@7411y]

I'm not surprised the back fell off that minesweeper, it's from the other side of the world to Australia after all

[@nl7486]

I think the reason the Dearing went North from Newport News is that South America is really a lot further east than we generally think. They would probably follow the Gulf Stream towards Europe, sail past that Azores, and then to Brazil instead of fighting the current all the way to South America (in the Northern Hemisphere currents generally flow clockwise). (Disclaimer: I am guessing, and am not a maritime professional)

[@firefox3187]

When you said they dynamited the five master, I flash-backed to the video of the town that blue up that rotting whale in the 60/70’s 😂

[@redbasher636]

Yall made me think of Limbo of the Lost. Captain Schooner Briggs!

[@sirrliv]

Lurid Liners? Satanic Steamers? Terror Trampers? Demonic Dreadnoughts? Frightful Ferries? I can go on :P Great episode, guys. Though I must admit, I'm a bit surprised you didn't go after the disappearance of the USS Cyclops. Not least because, at least according to KZbin naval historian and daytime engineer Drachinifel, that one might actually have an engineering related explanation; Jupiter Class colliers weren't built too good, hauled around highly acidic coal, transferred to hauling ore with basically no modification or repair, length lines up perfectly with wave frequency in the Bermuda Triangle. So basically, this clapped out old freighter that's already half rotted from the coal, carrying a load of volatile manganese ore that's either overloaded if loaded by volume or underloaded and free to shift if loaded by weight, and by some accounts being handled by an inexperienced and undisciplined crew, runs into a storm off Bermuda where her bow and stern are riding the wave tops, and the whole darn thing snaps in half and sinks with all hands.

[@Dong_Harvey]

Damn communist waves

[@pokeguy742]

There needs to be a second Halloween special, but it's just everyone trying to improv a scene where Alice is being forced to walk across a suspension bridge.

[@SillyVixen420]

"Creepy canoe" nearly floored me.

[@joyg2526]

Y'all have the knack for making creepy & mysterious stories into completely absurd and ridiculous nonsense. This podcast could be used to kill any and all sinister/scary vibes from any situation.

[@jamespocelinko104]

If you like that perhaps I could recommend Bad Creepypasta on the Michaelleroi channel.

[@jaysea5939]

37:38 "hoist up the thing" Wait wait does Alice listen to The Longest Johns?

[@alicecaldwell-kelly9530]

yes

[@jaysea5939]

Nice!