What if Porn Was Actually Satanic? An Honest Conversation With Ray Ortlund

[@debbdebbb]

We don't come to church to polish our righteousness. We come to church to open up about our brokenness.🔥

[@MosesBarr]

Straight fire 🔥

[@Giftedchef]

Yea that hit hard

[@kamilaguerrero7264]

“My sexual intensity is not for me” THAT IS A GAME CHANGER SIR

[@jleor5068]

what an awakening.

[@thepipingbagbakery4399]

Wow wow wow! God delivered me, a woman, from the bondage of pornography addiction some years ago. It was such a profound deliverance that I cannot recall the day it happened, I just remember thinking…I don’t desire that anymore. I wondered when it happened. I thought I would never be delivered because it stemmed from being molested as a very little girl and had propelled me into relationships, sexual and non-sexual, that were toxic and abusive. Thank you pastor Ray for having a heart given over to God, not only for those who engage with pornography second hand, but for those who are trafficked and groomed into it. Jackie and Preston your transparency is beautiful. Thank you, thank you, thank you. Thank You Daddy God!

[@jenesis_8]

The same happened for me this year 🙌🏽… was exposed to pornography when I was 8 and wrestled on and off till the age of 32. Tried everything… but to God be the glory because I KNOW I’m free!!!

[@thepipingbagbakery4399]

@ Amén!

[@al-bakersophie6583]

I really pray that this happens for me too. Your testimony is powerful and gives me hope because our stories are similar. I detest porn so much, and what I know it's doing to me and others and mkst importantly, the Spiritt of God within me. I just don't know how to stop. But I know that my victory is certain in Christ. I just need to know how to walk in it. Thanks for sharing your testimony.

[@thepipingbagbakery4399]

@@al-bakersophie6583 I am grateful to have that testimony and to share it. I pray it encourages you and reminds you that He, Daddy God, desires us to be free of bondage. He takes on the work of setting us free and that is what we trust in. Not ourselves, but His heart towards us. When I tell you I can’t tell you the day He totally and completely delivered me, I mean it. A thought came to me one day, some years ago, that I couldn’t remember the last time I had engaged in that behavior, that’s when I realized that He had set me free from DECADES of addiction. I thought I’d go to my grave bond by it, but thanks be to God who give US the victory! Walk in that assurance. You are in my prayers.

[@SK-fy8dl]

Please also address fictional porn. Many women read erotic literature, and many men and women read or watch pornographic anime/manga.

[@CookWithStephh]

Omg yes mine started from those Zane novels as a teenager

[@newid10]

I’ve just started the episode but it would be good to also cover TV shows that are very explicit

[@tiffanycarson6073]

So true and I didn't realize it until I got older.

[@withniejules2244]

​@newid10 Many shows on Netflix are that explicit. Shows often targeted to teens and young adults do this. Shows like Euphoria, Bridgerton, On My Block, and Dear White People have that issue.

[@shantew3542]

Thiss i say it all the time its something often ignored and easy to hide

[@jamiebrown9780]

the statement Ray made about how God Entrusted him with his wife who suffered brought me to tears because God is so strategic.. this allows us who have suffered to know a better life. a life of love, a life of peace, a life of not always having to pour in other peoples cup but in yet be restored, renewed and have our wounds nursed. at the end of the day we're all looking to be loved.. and its through that love that we understand Christ's love all the more. i think we take Matthew 22:37-39 lightly. we don't know that by being and acting this Word out we are unknowingly healing wounds in people.

[@matildaadefalujo5364]

Amen

[@michaelbarone9836]

Matthew chapter 22, verses 37-39 (in case you don’t have a Bible handy) … “Jesus replied: “ ‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’ And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’” ‭‭Matthew‬ ‭22‬:‭37‬, ‭39‬ ‭NIV‬‬

[@ktismia]

Jesus never fails to speak to me, he is a great father. Never have I experienced love & wisdom through Gods people after time & time again falling short of his glory. I started listening to this getting ready to work because I knew it was the Lord speaking to me. And I wanted to finish it before I had to clock in. As soon as I parked, it ended. Just goes to show how perfect the Lords timing is.

[@paintotheworld8445]

Amen

[@SoliDeoGloria54]

HIS timing is perfect.

[@hiimanhuman]

Damn, the timing of this vid..pray for me guys

[@purplepenpassion9507]

🙏🏿

[@shiyabrookins]

Pray for your sis too... the timing 🤧😮‍💨🙏🏾 Jesus.... When we feel particularly vulnerable, protect our hearts from any threats of the enemy. Help us to release our shame so that you can heal us. In the face of hardship, please hold us firmly so that we are not shaken. In Jesus’ name, amen!

[@Dr.teeloww]

I pray for both of yall. That you both are strengthened in spirit by the grace of God. And that you are able to wear the armor of God (Ephesians 6:10). The battle isn’t of flesh and blood. But of principalities. May they all flee from you today and forever more. May God’s love engulf yall in the dark places. Love you all

[@derrisleemusic1998]

I got you brother!

[@hiimanhuman]

@ thanks🤝🏾

[@nyecore]

Thank you Jackie for being vulnerable. You gave me the language for my experience

[@rondacreative]

I love this conversation and that you touch on the topic of pornography. As a Black woman who has struggled with an addiction to pornography and masturbation and experienced God's freedom, I would love to hear about this topic from a women's perspective as well. I think we rarely equate this type of addiction to women and it's still a very taboo topic.

[@HoneyBunRoad]

22:00 I almost started crying. So vulnerable & honest. A man that can be this self aware AND the work AND leans on God? I’m going through a breakup and I’m beating myself up about the boundaries & things I had and this just reminded me that Godly men do in-fact exist.

[@namsb.5221]

Its phenomenal, more miraculous really, how Jackie has softened up, let her guard down and sat more on her femininity. What the Holy Spirit is doing to and with both your hearts is such a marvel guys. Thank you sir and ma'am for sharing your journey with God with us.

[@kaseykamisaki7433]

When Jackie cries, we all do. ❤ this convo was SO edifying

[@wellwateredwomen_official]

Literally. 🫂💓

[@cathycorona2656]

I was crying at my desk at work. It’s just beautiful to see how God has shown himself for her thru Preston. It may not be perfect all the time but God has shown the both of them how love is more than sex. I pray the same for me one day. I pray God Sends me the type Of love I need. ❤

[@gowithhisflow5853]

I definitely cried too I'm so happy that she has security and pure love

[@uber_stuber]

so much truth!

[@wheremaddygoes]

Immediately 😂

[@mariselaobando7895]

Jackie, I feel your pain deeply. And unfortunately I know it all too well. But I’m encouraged to see that the Lord is still working on it in your life. I’ve been walking with the Lord 12 years and married for 10 and some days I’m discouraged because I think that this is supposed to be done and dealt with and when it’s not I feel deep shame and sorrow. Thank you for your faithfulness. And for opening up.

[@stephengoodson9619]

This guy is talking about how the women in porn have been lied to. I’m also thinking there are plenty of guys who have felt that way as well. Porn lies to you and takes your soul whether you’re the person doing it or watching.

[@astriid_pin_eda]

The “Genesis 1 was written before the fall in Genesis 3” This is so good because it is a healthy way to view ourselves in the eyes of God. It is hard to believe (when we sin) that He loves us because we run to Genesis 3 instead of Genesis 1 😭😭 Wow, that just set me free from that lie of Satan. 🙏🏼🙏🏼 Praise the Lord for eyes and ears to hear and see! ❤️❤️🙏🏼 God bless you Perry’s and Ortlund’s!

[@denissebriceno913]

I was deeply blessed by this as a mother, a wife, a pastor, a teacher and a child of God. You don’t need to be struggling with porn to be blessed by this message. Give it a watch! ❤️

[@Remainunnamed2]

I’m struggling so hard with this. If anyone sees this, pray for me.

[@ABillionYearsAhead]

Wow, feeling super blessed. Thank you so much Jackie and Preston for being so vulnerable.

[@Icon_Winn]

This episode blessed me. The part where he spoke of it being an attack against the woman. Reminded me of Revelations 12 where it says the dragon was angry with the woman who gave birth to Jesus and declared war against all her children the ones who keep Gods commandments and maintains the testimony of Jesus wow. I also absolutely love yall vulnerability about your marriage. Thank you for your obedience ❤

[@drossiliaigouwe6706]

Dear Jackie, dear Preston, I want to say a big thank you for this podcast. I can't stop crying right now, but they are tears of total deliverance. I am Gabonese living in Berlin (Germany) for 9 years and was also born again for almost 9 years in Jesus Christ 💓. I have indeed been connected to your KZbin podcasts for almost 5 years and am blessed. But I must admit that this particular podcast is powerful and full of love that I can feel here in Berlin. In a word, I thank our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ who has raised you up in this season for millions of people around the world who need to hear this message that delivers. I also thank the pastor you invited because I see that Jesus Christ works with him. Truly, thank you for existing in Jesus Christ 💓

[@margaretturner4467]

Ray Ortlund’s description of his sexuality for his wife was eye opening. And it better helps me understand the purpose of sexual intimacy in marriage.

[@mylilpc]

His closing was exactly how I felt watching this. I love y’all for opening yourselves up like this to do this very difficult work for the kingdom. Bless you all ❤

[@ProudArmyWife1529]

I thank you all for your obedience. My husband sent me this video last night. Our story is very similar to the Perry's VERY. I have been praying long and hard for God to renew our marriage and although we have been doing the work and having hard conversations, I couldn't get him to understand how he made me feel sexually but God used you beautiful men and woman of God to drive the point home for him. I broke down crying when Jackie said, "No today was a difficult day but can we watch a movie, or are there other avenues of intimacy that might open me up to a yes". I broke because I've been trying to years to get my husband to understand that but I thank God for opening his eyes ears and heart to receive this message. So again I say thank you all for your obedience. My God continue to shine His light on you and through you all. Much love from the Barkers ❤🙏🏾

[@fearlessdaughterKesha]

Just WOW!!! This dialogue! Last week was phenomenal this week was off the charts! Come with the wisdom my brother!

[@kemmyoluwo4732]

I tried it at 14 and was disturbed and NEVER watched it again..I just couldn’t take it…I FLED.

[@FearofGodmom]

Thank God for His mercy!

[@RudyRudes18]

12:10 I use to know a man who would tell me I could make a lot of money with the body I got, I’m so thankful and blessed that I broke free from that man and didn’t end up on that path.

[@courtney3807]

37:30 This part made me cry. I felt every word that Jackie said. I am praying for y’all always 🤍

[@shadeyskelso]

This was soooo good! Thank you for this vulnerable conversation. I related a lot with what Preston said about friendship and the advice Jackie gave about not having expectations on what they can do for you but how you can serve your friendships. Also, I started to cry with Jackie when she opened up about the need to be loved unconditionally. I felt that in my soul.

[@TheaCammock]

This such a powerful episode. Also the relationship y'all have with the Ortlund's is so refreshing and healing to see.

[@doloresmedina0617]

This was such a great pod. Thank you for being vulnerable Preston and Jackie! ❤The struggle a lot of people face with Sex and porn arent spoken about enough in the Christian faith. This episode really helped me.

[@Iamdmgartrell]

This episode was deep and Ray was on point about what the next great awakening / revival will look like. It's actually happening now.

[@donnamcclary-wells8202]

Thank You Preston and Jackie for Your Transparency and Vulnerability. Thank You Pastor Ray for your Wisdom.

[@janeecelamadieu1136]

I unfortunately struggle with this sin, but this talk has given me great perspective on how to understand this alongside the bible.

[@jeanettawatkins3356]

This episode was amazing. I pray that the porn industry be dismantled. Thank you Preston thank you Jackie for your vulnerability, you set so many free today. Thank you for letting God use you in such a profound way!

[@pktaylorYT]

This is such a healing conversation... my God...

[@iamcharane]

There is so much healing in this specific. That question Ray asked is a big talking point. As someone that struggles with pornography I appreciate this episode a lot. Thank you.

[@FearofGodmom]

May God heal your heart. Be set free, in JESUS Name.💜

[@tinafrazier8386]

Wow Perry’s this is so good. Thank you for being so selfless and thinking of us. This is such good teaching.

[@pholoso8884]

So goodddd

[@vesselsxk5508]

My Lord....I was all set and ready to say some things to my husband. I felt so justified to tell him some things... Now I feel the need to tell him the truth but in love, remembering the wounds that he has suffered and the effects of those wounds which happens to be what we need to confront in this conversation. Thank you Pastors for having this conversation and reminding me that marriage is a ministry of service. God Bless you all .

[@SterlingQDavis]

I just finished listening to this beautiful episode. Thank you Perrys & Pastor Ortlund, this really ministered to me.

[@janettiispaghetiii]

This was a super great and needed conversation!!!! Husband and I listened together and could relate to you guys so much and also what the pastor said was so spot on! I was emotional tooo Jackie 😭😭😭

[@Beelynda]

I love you guys I’m 26 and literally trying to get myself together now and stay away from something and see this helped . honestly I feel like some of my fragments of been broken or hurt I’m not happy but all I could do is go in my waiting stage and try my hardest to stay consistent

[@TippysTieDyes]

My goodness. This conversation blessed me so much. I relate to Jackie in so many ways and this conversation solidified that even more. Thank you, each one of you, for your transparency and inviting us all into this conversation.

[@PatriciaHarrison-m6s]

what a great conversation! Thank you so much!! over here leaking out of my eyes!

[@diamondm5780]

Thank you Jackie!!!! Always finding the words for me, love you sis.

[@Morningstar2216]

Hey Perry's: Don't know how or why your video popped up in my feed but it did AND I am so thankful! I have been a christian woman nearly all my adult life. I have agonized from teen age to now trying to understand why men are disrespectful in their treatment toward women. This goes back to Biblical times. Godly men love King David and King Solomon to me ... a woman ... I find them disgusting. I have asked male friends, family, pastors to explain ... help me to understand why men behave as they do. Man and all living creatures were made of the earth. Woman was formed of man. Why would a man degrade his own self, part of his being. Thank you, thank you thank you for having Ray Ortland on your program and for having the courage to discuss these issues so openly. I really appreciate it, from the bottom of my heart. Finally three men being real men and speaking frankly of very difficult issues. Many of my decades old questions have been answered. I've already "shared" this video with a number of people and will be sharing with more. Will also be tuning into more of your videos. Have a great day!

[@jasmineherisse-packard7330]

Listened to the podcast episode already and I’m definitely down for watching it in full!

[@ChristianEvans-x1u]

😮‍💨 This episode was so good! Ray is full of wisdom. Jackie and Preston being extremely vulnerable. All the things! Thank you! Y’all are helping so many!

[@j.studies2296]

Whew Jackie, that was relatable at the end 😢

[@makayafatimad8129]

40:04 when he said “Every one of us has married someone who has suffered deeply” it really struck me at this time of my life of letting go of someone I had premarital sex with and hoped for a relationship with…it gave me hope in knowing I am still desirable even tho I’ve suffered sexual abuse (in the past). Thank you guys for your vulnerability this was healing for me. Thank you Jesus for redeeming us. ❤

[@gabrielrolon8600]

This is one of the greatest talks on christian sexuality I've ever heard. My God the Lord is good 🎉

[@teamroberts0315]

Porn isn’t about sex it’s about power !

[@fonzo8965]

Wow that’s prosofund. I appreciate that

[@theepreachjesustubes3268]

IT'S ABOUT BOTH SEX AND POWER, AND SEX IS EXTREMELY POWERFUL CUS GOD MADE IT, NOT DEVILS WHO ABUSE IT OUTSIDE OF ITS MAIN PURPOSES...

[@Soul-Alignment]

@@fonzo8965Ray says that in the podcast 💯

[@valeriaramirez2586]

Bars

[@kingdomgirlie]

Definitely feel so close to yall right now🥹🥺 Thank you for letting us in in such a real way. I pray God continues to strengthen your marriage, may He continue to bring you closer and closer to Him individually and collectively! Im honestly looking forward to my kingdom marriage because of your beautiful example. God bless you Preston and Jackie❤️

[@lifeintheclear]

I absolutely loved this conversation… as it is one that I deeply care about! Thank you Preston, Jackie, and Pastor Ray for eloquently and biblically articulating the beauty of our sexuality. The enemy hates our sexuality, hence he strives to distort our senses - so we can become pursuers of our sensuality. Just like purity isn’t a state of being rather it is a stance of living - never a destination, always a journey. The Body of Christ certainly “needs” to hear more of these conversations. Thank y’all for being His willing vessels.🙏🏽

[@pepper8437]

This was such a necessary conversation. The entire body needs to see this

[@shays.2576]

Okay the way Ray talks about Jeanie... is anyone else dying to have Jackie and her do a podcast and share testimonies together?? Cause I think we'd all be a bucket of tears and ministered to like a hug❤

[@Every-skin]

Wow Jackie I wish I could hug you. This was so good to my soul. Preston bless you guys and the pastor it was love through out this whole episode

[@bazzroti]

The number of commercials and adverts in this and the previous video is CRAZY!!

[@Iamkgems]

This is so good ! This is grown , mature Christianity with a mix of therapy ! So many gems! ❤

[@theSommerrose14]

This was incredible. So much goodness here, but I was especially struck by the thought that we all marry someone who has suffered. 🤯 So obvious but profound

[@Fabulous_Four]

Nothing but eye opening information being received. I thank the Perry’s and Ray for being obedient to God and discussing this topic.

[@thierrypierrelouis722]

Thank you so much Pastor Ortlund for your amazing insights! A big shout-out to the Perrys for this awesome podcast/video

[@NaturalWifeyandMamaBear]

Love Ray and y’all! This was so good. And needed. ❤ thank you y’all! 🙏

[@karaboc.modise7778]

This is such a necessary conversation.

[@SheSeeksTruth90]

I must agree with Pastor Ray, my love and respect for you both has truly grown after what you've shared in this episode. Thank you for your vulnerability, strength and courage sharing your heart for the glory of God. That is NOT easy to do! This podcast has been such a blessing to myself and my husband this past year, both individually and together in our marriage. Our hearts are changing and drawing nearer to the LORD, and I am so grateful to God for yall 🙏🏽 But yeah... i just had to drop this comment and let ya know lol. I have been and will continue to pray for you both and your ministry. Its reaching hearts for sure. God bless yall and much love ❤

[@michelemiller7046]

Thank you for your vulnerability Jackie 😭 This podcast was so powerful and life changing.

[@godlikestevie]

My key takeaways: the devil hates sex, the devil hates women, these actors and actresses are in this position involuntarily and continue to be in those positions due to lies, coercion, confusion, and trauma.

[@SAVAGEoLIFE]

I dunno man i dont think they are all there against their will. Plenty of chicks use it as a way to make easy money because our society downplay sex. Too many young women straight running to OF at 18 tryna make quick easy money.

[@SomeonesTswanaDad]

It’s interesting that no one ever talks about the men in porn. The actors in these things. Though they are probably not trafficked into the industry, I reckon there’s an insane amount of brokenness we feed into, in their lives, when we watch porn. From drug addictions, to their own sense of perversion, their degraded bodies, their past traumas. It tells me that we tend to not extend compassion to men.

[@SAVAGEoLIFE]

I dont believe the majority of women in the most current times are being trafficked. Its just becoming the current thing for young girls to make money. Girls are making onlyfans soon as they turn 18. I cant even open up my explore page without half the screen being some women sexualizing herself. But to your point i think men arent brought up because its viewed being a guys "dream"

[@Zandim.m]

It would be so nice to get married to a person who is fully aware that they are marrying someone who has past injuries and their role to be part of the healing process. Nowadays, we marry because we want something from the other and not because we want to be part of the transformative journey from past hurt toward healing. In essence, we marry out of selfishness. Hence, when things don' t turn out the way we want, we quit on marriage.

[@nowwithnicki]

Thank you both for sharing your hearts. Jackie, your comment on wanting to be loved, just because, not because you can offer something to your spouse. I feel that deeply. Thank you.

[@purpose2107]

This pod is beyond beautiful. This is a topic that needs to be talked about so much more openly around the world💕

[@superduperjoi6800]

I listened to this and immediately went to binge the death of pron audiobook. it seems like no one is talking about this!! so real

[@superduperjoi6800]

coming back to this after a week feeling convicted - I havent watched anything but recognize so many ig girls make it on IG! How can I escape. Lord forgive me

[@the_equillizer]

Bruh is spitting fire through the whole video! Y'all gotta bring him back on!!!! 🔥🔥🔥

[@JenJHawes]

Thank you for letting me l know I am not alone with how I struggle in this area Jackie. You blessed me today.

[@AIM_5783]

This podcast put another lens and perspective on porn and BODY ministry. “It’s not the people who are good that do evil, it’s the people who are not thinking that commit evil. BARZ!!

[@raynabonnett0209]

Not yall having me at my desk 😭 this is so good! ❣

[@daisytmzkae]

What a discussion, this was eye opening. I’m grateful for this conversation.

[@tiahcoates108]

my goodness, this video opened the door for healing to start happening! Thank you for your obedience!

[@teneshablackmon]

Much needed, praying churches can offer this type of space for honesty for each other leaders and congregations

[@jocelynd7669]

I needed to see this at this very moment. Thanks yall for this! Really and truly!

[@acardoza14]

What a powerful message ! Thank you for sharing.

[@kellannkyle7955]

Thank you for having this vulnerable real conversation for us to hear and see. I saw myself in it and had some revelations of my own walls I put up.

[@JoyN246]

Thank you so much for the raw honesty and TRUTH shared in this podcast. It's so refreshing!

[@dareonmillar8610]

We have to do better at attacking pornography fr. Its not normal, it is a big deal, it is adultery and it is killing families

[@abram730]

Porn is normal, it's just that what is popular isn't normal. Christians are to practice self-control. So divorces would be better for families?

[@Dnell-tb1yd]

We need to do better combating porn but, we aren’t properly arming ourselves for the battle.

[@CandaceLeAnne]

This conversation was the kingdom of heaven coming to earth on this topic. 99.5% of women, whether sucked into porn, sex trafficking, or some kind of addictive behavior that leads to fornication or sexual abuse has been sold this lie that it is natural and normal for sex to happen outside of a committed, loving, God-protected relationship. They’ve been made to feel like they are the servants of this norm and men are the receivers of sexual benefit and if they also get pleasure out of it then that affirms the recreational nature of nameless, faceless sexual practice. It goes against everything a woman’s heart naturally longs for before she is perverted and defiled by a sin sick world. That leaves her giving sex in hopes of receiving love while men are being lied to and utterly perverted in other ways which make them grow even less connected, productive, and fulfilled as they turn to porn. Yep this is a pillar of satanic rule on earth. Incredible discussion. THANK YOU.

[@SeptemberUnique]

Ray was not lying… made me love ya’ll even more! Thank you for sharing your hearts.

[@janeenchambers3297]

So Powerful.....and stronghold shattering! I will be saving this!

[@Healing_on_a_bluecouch_]

WOW..... What a beautiful beautiful Conversation, thank you God for your grace 😢🥺🙏🏽

[@sandman9820]

What a word 🙏🏾. Thanks for allowing the lord to speak through yall.

[@FreeDom-podcast-withDJ]

This was such a beautiful episode. Thank you for your insight, transparency and vulnerability. May God continue to bless your union and everything you both touch. May His hand forever be on you and your lineage. We are blessed and transformed by your YES to be used by God in this generation. Thank you 🙏🏾💜

[@BurtoniousPrime]

"If we allow porn to suceed we are saying i dont believe the Gospel AT ALL..." If thats not a convicting statement, then i dont know what is!

[@AndreaCumareNunez]

This sounds so much like Theology of the Body. You guys should get a Theology of the Body speaker on here!!! Its so incredibly real and insightful.

[@Elizgameromanti]

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve shared things like this to try to encourage, where I’m like “I wasn’t expecting to cry”. Lol

[@paintotheworld8445]

I love you Jackie and Preston Perry, God bless you guys and your family❤

[@mrschosen]

THIS WAS SOOOOOO GOOD. THANK YALL❤✝️

[@makiebahatton2628]

The pastor nailed it with "porn is the wallpaper of our culture" I wrote a paper in 2007, during one of my collegiate stints 😊, on how pornography feeds and fuels human sex trafficking and all of its affiliates industries!

[@asiadabner5643]

I’m forever grateful for this ministry. Transparent yet Authentically reflecting Christ. Thank you God & thank you Perry’s. Enjoy the Holidays to the fullest 🤍✨

[@Delivereddarri]

I’m cryinnnggg bc Jackie cried omg I’ve never heard her get emotional 😭🥺

[@latricefondren1198]

I love ya'll, I'm crying, and this was very necessary! That is all.

[@user-ys6lw6uy4g]

This man’s wisdom is through the roof. Thank you for this!

[@ashleyholmes4085]

This hit my core. I’m crying and I never cry