What Mindset Are Guys In After They Pull Away? What is He Thinking About?

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[@ElliotScottDating]

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[@georginasilvadiaz8847]

Elliot Scott Dating you look tired darling 😘 thanks for sharing

[@lovejustbeingme]

Nice site. :)

[@biancapierce639]

Yes, you are fantastic. Much more honest and down to earth than any of the other dating coaches on You Tube.

[@ncrayp5255]

There are several ideas for how to get any man you want be patient Use fewer words and choose them carefully Communicate via behaviour as well as words (I read about these and more on Maras magic words site )

[@melissawellman2112]

Elliot Scott Attraction Coach yes it has I’m probably the worst person at love games to honest to caring too etc.. can’t wait to try this

[@beckytull8505]

It's OUR fault a guy doesn't like us????? Wow. If a guy doesn't see my value, that's his problem!!

[@redfather5342]

Becky Tull what value what are talking about

[@letinaday3933]

Becky Tull PERIOD!!!!!! And I haven’t even got thru his intro😂😂😂😂

[@thatlizzu8315]

Periodttt

[@annemann8048]

You know...life is short...if he pulls away let him go...he will find out that the same game he plays on women will eventually be played on him. he will not like it. Tired of all the games.

[@alessandrac1940]

Well said!

[@sadafmotlekar5303]

True

[@ladennayoung2939]

Yep

[@christinainthecity]

I think if a guy truly likes you and wants to be with you, he won't be playing all of these games.. why risk losing you? I'm so done with these games, it's tiring. I don't want someone that doesn't want me

[@melissaberry8810]

No you're right, if he pulls away he doesn't care about you, he's self-centered.

[@vickicsurbs444]

Mel Berry AMEN! That's exactly what I was thinking. I wouldn't ever take an orbiter back after pulling away.

[@winniecantonese]

Exactly!! He is just Me-Mindset, Self-center.....just is not worthy for the love!!!

[@melissaberry8810]

Scared of toasters I assure you I don’t play games. I’m totally open with my feelings. I guess that scares off certain guys

[@redfather5342]

Just like you

[@rebecamunoz6721]

Everything's all good except the part where you said its not his fault for not liking you, its yours, I disagree, its nobody's fault, when the chemistry isn't there it just isnt, you can do all you like but if it's not there it's never gonna be. Don't say its our fault.

[@angeliqueesprit9155]

Rebeca Muñoz I just started watching his videos just to get different perspectives. He doesn't strike me as a guy who get "The girls" but anyway. No its not the anyone's fault if the chemistry isn't there.

[@freeKick185]

Rebeca Muñoz victim complex

[@nikkig1030]

I agree.. he lost me there.

[@fantasiazplatkami]

exactly, it s not woman's fault, you can do all right but he may still be unavailable for serious stuff

[@kittenheels1958]

His mind is not on you ... his mind is on envisioning about the next lady he’s about to tap

[@freeKick185]

Catalina MaGoo or perhaps his next house or car or business?

[@dredre8035]

Yeah... Most likely chasing after women who don't want them! LOL... Okay. That's why they come back! Nope, stay gone!

[@tosheacollier2039]

So True.

[@shannonpickens7695]

@@dredre8035 they try so hard.. don’t they? 🤣😂. Stupid bastards

[@angeliqueesprit9155]

Some men are just confused and what they think they want is never enough. My ex definitely disengaged! I gave him an altimatum if you leave there's no coming back. He then pack his things n walked out saying its not what he wanted but if i want him to go then he will. I cut off all contact with him even through social media.. He thought I would be so hurt and upset not at all. Its been 2 months I have moved on. Now he text just about every day saying he loves me so much , and even send love songs. The love I felt at the time has deteriorated! Sincerely, Sorry, not sorry!

[@ladyt18998]

Good for you, what an azz!!!

[@freeKick185]

Angelique Esprit he is a weak beta male . That’s it , real dudes like me won’t give a shit if u don’t respond or fall back , it’s way too much pussy out here sweetie. Remember it’s more women than men population wise

[@md5329]

Good job!

[@FM-zg5hz]

@@freeKick185 Actually there are more men than women in the world. Look it up yourself. Stop spreading false information lol

[@freeKick185]

@@FM-zg5hz that’s wrong I’m not looking shit up .: post a link to that insinuation and I will post mine

[@christinacollins9251]

6:10-6:12 “No nice try” Great analogy, thank you for the hand gestures as well 😂

[@user-oy2gr9ol5c]

Right on Elliot! Thank you for your wisdom. I totally agree. Not reaching out.. ❤️🙏🏼😊Emily

[@IamKarryanne]

Your coming out blazing with all the videos!

[@Tube69Baby]

Thank you Elliot, I love all dating advice. I feel more confident and guided when I see these videos :) Thank you again.

[@Tamica612]

I've only watched 4 of your videos and they have helped me a lot... Thank you

[@mayame1079]

you are really the best Elliot Scott! so sharp, clear, right to the point and very informative and eye opener. you are saving my love life..im learning so much about the malel mind and behaving according to your advice and its much much better and helthier. thank you and keep up the great work. greetings and love from the other side of the world!

[@Figgygirl88]

Yes ! I live for your videos, Elliot ! ♥️

[@tinag3757]

I got one conclusion, guys are not like us, most of them pull away, they are afraid of commitment, or they want their freedom, or it's another girl, or they want to make sure is it the girl right one ( they are never sure, he wants to see will he miss you, they think that they can love only one woman all life, they are so hard on giving chance to a new girl), they pull away right after was so great with the girl and right after you show him you are into him, also they pull away in a long serious relationship. And most of them are sure that we will be here waiting so they are not afraid of losing us, if they were I am sure they will not pull away so easy

[@dr.m6152]

You summed it up right!

[@strawberryjpeg6000]

I don’t feel as bad now but he really insulted me cos he made me chase him 🙄 he made me chase him and get curious about him and then pulled away more so now I’m giving him so much space

[@rebeccameyer8144]

This is so spot on!

[@gerr2035]

Elliott tells it like it is!!

[@lindam7821]

You're on a roll!

[@justpeachy4380]

Absolutely love your channel Elliot, you really know your shit & You ARE MY FAVORITE dating coach!!

[@nailed_sa]

Elliot your the best I swear you read my mind sometimes! Whenever I'm confused about something specific your video covers it all! Thank you so much💛💛

[@ninaharper7138]

He's still in love with his ex.

[@Jen_nifer99]

even if she cheated on him and it's been about 3-4 years since they broke up?

[@1Skorpia]

Doubt it. Or she wouldn't be his ex. Chances are he wants options.

[@mwoods2375]

I think this is the case with a couple guys I met. I really feel that I was just a distraction for the last one. Yes I looked at his Facebook page last night.... he had all these songs posted about being done wrong by a woman. I think I was right

[@klddere3734]

@@1Skorpia unless she dumped him

[@iknowwhatsup2880]

Early on, each party owes the other nothing. Only until the man makes a decision for a relationship does he have accountability. You accept, then you do too. We expect too much too soon. Rejection is protection. Sucks when you think you really like someone, but chances are your in "love" with your fantasy because you don't know each other.

[@skyfall1481]

The mindset should be, focusing on what you want. Not- when he’s ready, I’ll be ready or I’ll wait for him. No!!! If it doesn’t serve you, pull away or walk away for good. Stop giving the guy all this power and control. It up to you as well, you get to make a choice!!!

[@strawberryjpeg6000]

It makes sense now, I was just being his friend but he was flirting w me whilst teasing me and being confusing now he’s ghost and I’m giving him space

[@agathangenzirabona8339]

Guys need to men up and tell whoever they’re dating if they’re not interested

[@winniecantonese]

Great video as always!!

[@SakunaSwonaChannel]

Yes thank you it makes sense!

[@redcricket5751]

Maaaaaane you are soooo spot Onnnnn!

[@pruett4u]

Hi Elliot, I’m glad you’re doing great on your channel! :) I am so done with these dating games. I think I am done for now.

[@LoriBarkerDanceFitness]

Dude! you have helped me so much in understanding what is going on in his head. is there a video of when he retreats then comes back?

[@json9368]

I did this with a guy and now he has a girlfriend

[@katherinebrown2841]

so im 18 and the past year, ive had a lot of family issues that really affected my academics as well as the other aspects in my life. it stressed me out so much and so it made me loose motivation in school and sports and everything else that used to give me value. I had this wonderful boyfriend that would support me but because i was so stressed out, I stressed him out. I would take things out on him and i started depending on him as my main source of happiness. he broke up with me because he said whenever he saw my name pop up on his phone, he would feel anxious. 2 days later, he reached out saying he couldnt do this anymore and he missed me too much to let his pride stop him from getting back together with me. Now, its the same issue and he broke up with me 2-3 weeks ago. on top of that, hes stressed out because of college applications, working to pay for his car insurance and phone bill, and working out. He told me he feels too overwhelmed and doesnt think he is ready for a relationship. I admit, I was very toxic and clingy because of my circumstance at home but I want to change because not only do I care about him a lot but i had put so much more stress on myself. I think this period apart is good because last time, it wasnt enough to really motivate me to change but i feel like im changing alot. I started a new job, started to share my care to other people instead of focusing on just for him, and am changing my thinking and taking a second to breathe before I say something out of emotion which i will definietly regret later on, and hanging out with other people, and forcing down my pride so I can try new things and meet new people (at first I thought i just wasnt a people's person but now i really enjoy it). These are all things that made me toxic. Do you think he will come back or have I already wasted my 2nd chance already?

[@leahgannon8838]

Hi Elliot ( : showing some love ❤️, I'm lovin' your videos, very helpful. I have a question, what are your opinions on the 30 day no contact rule some other people swear by?

[@jujuanne4590]

i love your honesty

[@yepeypo]

Thank you!

[@meganwolf3220]

Please make your videos longer that would be awesome 😫

[@avgwhitegurl6646]

He means from your guy's perspective. You scared him by being too unemotional or showing feelings too soon, etc., so you know what the guy is feeling. Don't get it twisted.

[@chucalissa9231]

Good stuff👍

[@BP-fh8np]

it could also be the opposite where the guy is initiating some contact and the lady Is playing hard to get and they guy is completely turned off by it and leaves after so many attempts.

[@MrCijuciju]

lovely presented!!

[@CookiePie00]

dont drink too much coffee it causes bad under eye circles

[@katsanta4763]

i love uuu Scotttt

[@queen-mg4jt]

Can you please explain why men shut down when they get mad and don't talk to you

[@Aariyan096]

Goldie Espinoza Exactly. He needs to.

[@letinaday3933]

Goldie Espinoza I do that myself lol...prob his feminine energy kickn in😂

[@ladennayoung2939]

@@Aariyan096 Because they are weirdos.

[@cosmic-dreams-]

Bcs when a women he cares about yelles at him he is afraid like when his mommy yells at him and needs to go cry somewhere bcs he is a disapointmen

[@marshwiggleme]

So Elliot, how about timing for reconnecting when a guy is pulling away. How long do you think is an average amount of time/space to give them as not to be perceived as aggressive ?

[@andreamcdonagh]

Just listening to your videos ...I mean it just breaks down into what type of person you are as in your either a relationship person or your... I mean as you said in one of your videos about guys always talking to other women as in tindr etc. How can relationships work cos they just have another woman lined up ... You either wanna work at a relationship or you dont.

[@faa1412]

Ughhhhhh I wish I came across your channel like 2 months ago!

[@miagilaani5853]

Can you please make a video about ghosting and breadcrumbing. I really want to get your perspective. A guy I've been seeing for 1.5 years has started ghosting on me for more than a month.

[@ladyt18998]

He's probably chasing after someone else right now, someone who cares will not ghost you, breadcrumb, or play games with you. It might be time to turn the tables my dear, show him what it looks and feels like. If he cares he won't like it and correct that behavior, if not, now you know, so just make that move and roll out on him! My dad use to always tell us that boys are like a bus when one leaves there will be another coming along shortly so just sit tight work on yourself, go out have fun, flirt, do you. There's something out there better for you, just thank your lucky stars and God that he showed you this one's true colors and if you choose to walk away do that, if not it's up to you.

[@letranger89]

What if they stalk after they pulled away and you never communicate and they don’t either but they stalk?

[@monmontt9747]

What if he’s already my boyfriend and he pulls away then he says that he’ve got some problems as an excuse?

[@ashleymuse7748]

What if I contact him the first time and we talk but then later that day he leaves me on read and then the next day for the second time we talk and then he leaves me on read then what do I do? It's been already 2 days since we talked and I know he got it because he still post stuff on Snapchat and I watch it...we don't date so I don't wanna come off strong

[@user-oy2gr9ol5c]

I’m pretty sure this was after my session with Elliot! So, after the guy pulled away, we ended up dating for several months, but I later found out he just had many other girlfriends. He evidently pulled away at different times because he had a lot to juggle.

[@ElliotScottDating]

It wasn't based on you haha ♥️

[@user-oy2gr9ol5c]

Ok weird, I had called you about the exact same situation 3 years ago. Same details 😊 no worries

[@valeriewalker5831]

thank you darling~~~

[@Bella-Mae0422]

A guy did this to me years ago. We met up on fb we messaged back and forth he was always hitting me up and was really sweet, but he also had a female best friend too which everybody thought there was more going on bc she apparently really liked him but he swore he didn’t see her that way but rumors were that they were sleeping together, just not dating. My dumb self didn’t see the red flags, we hung out only 3 Times, I really liked him, the 3rd date he was so distant and didn’t wanna hang out with me for long. After it was over I wasn’t hearing from him anymore, he wasn’t hitting me up or responding to me and he would just read and ignore my messages.. he finally came around and told me “I can see us together for a while but not forever” then told me I needed better. He played this on and off game with me, he would ignore my messages, then he’d hit me up out of no where leading me on again, then after I would respond he’d ignore me again for another few weeks.. he stood me up 3 Times. It would be from days to weeks to months before I’d hear from him again he’d have no problem hanging out with other girls but couldn’t hang out with me. Plus he apparently was going around telling people that we were still talking and also sleeping together when we never even had sex, he also lied to his cousin and told him he needed the car to go see me and we haven’t even talked in over a month I didn’t get where his mindset was like if he didn’t like me why tell people those lies? 5 months later, I reached out to make amends with him and he led me on again and I asked him if he wanted to hang out and he ignored me again so I finally told myself “Fuck it, he doesn’t want me? Well somebody else will”.. I didn’t reach out to him anymore, I finally was over it and started dating again and 2 months later I fell in love with somebody else, and 1 month after being in a relationship the jerk hits me up again after ignoring my message 3 Months earlier saying he did want to hang out and see me.. ahah nice try! I immediately shut that down and told him I wasn’t interested anymore. He tried again 10 months later to apologize and he was nice and willing to actually talk to me this time but I was still over it. I finally stopped responding to him and he left me alone since. I never understood his deal with me. He didn’t want me or want to see me but would tell people that we were messing around. Plus he was a heroin addict him and his female best friend. That’s why they hung out so much bc they would get high together and I’m sure they were sleeping together lol

[@daintyflygirl4va]

I went through the same shit..

[@starshipfire3438]

Does the women having children affects the way a guy deals with dating?

[@lovejustbeingme]

My "friend" pulls away after we are sexual. He doesnt text, doesnt call, but he watches all my snapchats. In a few weeks he will randomly text me and then the "chase" is on again. Its been like this for 4 months. I made it clear I dont want a boyfriend, but he still pulls away. So weird.

[@pam164]

lovejustbeingme Hi i would say he just wants you when he wants you! And then he cools right off when he has had you, if you let him he will just keep doing it to you. Just my take in it.

[@malooskitty9124]

lovejustbeingme same situation here

[@lovejustbeingme]

Agree. I recently ended a long term relationship, I am so out of this "dating game". These guy's trip me out! If it weren't for Elliot, I would be complete lost!

[@pam164]

lovejustbeingme Yes i know what you mean its a mine field out there it makes you feel like giving up. All i no now if i see any this flaky behaviour off a guy i end it coz i no its a pattern they keep doing over and over . Yea he good dating coach and tells you warts and all.

[@kaarikeaton6712]

k meg mine field out there😰😂😂😂😂...we keep getting blown to bits when we step out and try again...totally agree😒❤💥🌋

[@robynw3312]

How looooonng does it take for him to miss the woman... days? Weeks? Months?

[@thescarecrow2710]

He is thirty years old and we live in two different countries. We spent an amazing, sweet, cute, hot and spontaneous weekend together in Ireland before I came back to Italy yesterday. He said he was going to come back and visit me in Venice and he is going to check the flights... yet it s been a day he doesn t text me... should I trust me and not put him under any pressure? I think I can trust him but I don t know... should I text him in a few days time? should I bring up the topic again?

[@rrqqt.y9193]

How long is a little bit or how long to wait

[@paganmin8557]

this guy is only half right, i'm a guy and i pulled away because she expected me to chase her

[@swativirdi3020]

So u dumped her??? What did u expect?? Did u go back??

[@1385sandy]

Hi Elliot, I am almost sure of what your gonna say because I have been watching a lot of your videos but I would still like your opinion on it. I have been talking to this guy online and he asked me out on a date for Thursday night. We have been talking quite a bit and things were going well. Anyways last night as per usual I just sent him a quick message with no answer . Since this happens a lot I feel that would be relevant for me and the girls watching. I am thinking from watching you that he probably met someone else online and that he is probably ghosting me. So before I would of probably send him a message like are we still on for tonight? But to be honest I feel like if he really wants to see me , it's up to him to make plans. What is the best way to deal with situations like that? Let it go and not give a shit haha?

[@user-zi6yx7vk1s]

Sandrine Lanot if he cares he will confirm the date... it's better to know know where he's standing than later when you have invested... make other plans if he text back say he moves in a grandpa spend texting ;) and that your busy already ... again if he cares he'll make another date

[@1Skorpia]

Guys online are the worst players. They will literally say anything for nudes or sex. Guys online also are notorious for checking out alot of chics. Therefore he's probably met more than 1. I'd check who he follows. Especially ig.

[@gxniie1825]

Owh.. Shit! I thought he was thinking about me too after he did that shit.😂 but it's ok, i wish the time he come back to me,i'm not into him anymore. Because my feeling's fade by times moving..usually. idk other people but i'm that type of person.thanks anyway for explain the truth about this man! Good job 😊👍

[@debmccafferty1007]

Ex pulled away when I questioned a catfished photo

[@80sgirl21]

What if a guy does this back and forth for over 2 years and never asks me out? Is he just using me for ego boost? What should I do to stop it?

[@MelissaMaiga]

80s girl block him

[@paulaslife3781]

Grow your hair long again. I love your hair in a man bun and down its beautiful. You've lovely hair.

[@karenm0830]

I feel depressed after listening to this

[@melissajohnson7252]

Lmao me too 😂😂

[@Mrsqueen876]

Can you do a video on men lying and trust? How to go about dealing with a man who tells "white" lies? E.x. my bf told me that he will no longer watch porn, fast forward to months later I asked him if he watched porn recently and at first he said no then i asked again then he admitted to it. To me it feels like if you lie about something so little, what else are you lying about or doing behind my back? Am I over thinking it? What's the best way to handle a situation when a woman catches a man in a lie?

[@1Skorpia]

beautedereine guys will never stop watching porn. They say what you want to make you stay. Doubt he will stop lying. Look at his actions only. I would dump him.

[@sueumc2524]

You should watch porn too

[@strongerasone2403]

@@sueumc2524 hell no

[@-1lovethesea]

Hello Mr. Elliot, I have a problem, I am attracted to someone at work, I am so quiet and shy( mental illness and I can't help it) around him. He doesn't talk to me and he ignores me completely. Sometimes I talk to him just a little and I smile to him, he reciprocates just the amount of interaction I gave him, nothing more: if I talk to him, he talks to me, if I don't, he doesn't. He is not shy, he is a joker and very friendly with others. What is wrong with him? I want to cry because I have been building up feelings for him. I like him.

[@1Skorpia]

Girl 33 since he's outgoing he's showing you he's not shy.therefore it's clear he's not into you. Hes being polite. Dont assume every guy that talks to you wants a romantic relationship.keep it moving sis.

[@aishahhumairah8630]

Girl 33 there is nothing wrong with him.. He is just not into you girl...move on.. There is someone out there for you..

[@MaRuz1921]

I have a question, I was dating with a guy for almost a year, suddenly he started pulling away and I told him that if he wants time to makes his things I will give it to him obviously he reacted bad and got mad at me, like a week latter I saw a picture of him with other girl and I told him that I saw that picture and then I block him from fb and what's app but know he contact me and he tell me that if I want to talk We try to talk but it was more like a argue and he want know why I blocked him and delete form fb but I told him that's I was really Mad because he lied me and he must tell me the true about this girl but my point is should I block him or just ignore his messages

[@1Skorpia]

carmen ruiz get rid of him. He's playing you like a harp. Chances are there are more chics than just you two.

[@nancybentsen9381]

screw this pulling away crap

[@redfather5342]

You are overreacting

[@mwadjumamukamfizi2216]

Hahah bring a bottle of wine!!!thats crazy guys say that all the times

[@Magpie-wr8gg]

Coach Corey Wayne coaches this line all the time.

[@vlj9013]

Ladies create the attraction and crave and make guys win you

[@ohsuzeyq_]

OUR fault if he doesn't like us??? Wrong. It's just how it is. Nobody's fault.

[@christinacollins9251]

Oh well.

[@itsaenn]

He said im selfish and possesive 😶

[@lihong9389]

Beautiful blue eyes

[@shawanakhan9107]

Elliott.. Im dating a guy and in long distance relationship.. He is workaholic i knw that but some days bck he completely cut off.. No point of contact. No message no call.. Nothing.. We were on good notes that time.. But he ghosted.. After 2 weeks he jus texted that he is in some issues with his business will try to talk next week...... Nw im confused wat to do. He hasn't called yet. Please some suggestions.

[@gxniie1825]

shawana khan same situation..😅😅

[@stefincanada]

I guess when men stop having this mindset they finally find someone haha

[@MARYJOEBETHELBALDUR]

The Garbage man from out if town lol hahaha

[@natashamichelle8330]

Obviously

[@tyislovedbyjesus2914]

I don't enjoy ad about kissing...his voice...: (

[@angeliqueesprit9155]

This guy is talking out his ass!!😂✌

[@KellBell-oz3cu]

Does this apply to Christian guys?

[@KellBell-oz3cu]

So when he doesn't text for the whole week and then texts you, and then waits again and texts you what does that mean? He just recently started doing this because college has started again.

[@EstellaRJF]

GODLY GIRL23 just pray and focus on God and building your life, if he's the one for you, then it will work out. :)

[@KellBell-oz3cu]

Stella'sJournal thank you for replying I just need to know what does it sound like? I know all the details aren't here but idk 😐 I know it's Gods timing not mine

[@SlideRulePirate]

What the Guy's mindset is:- Jesus Christ another woman who has to turn everything into a zero sum competition. There's no spontaneity anymore because everything is a negotiation. Sex and affection have been weaponised in order to leverage power in the relationship. What he is thinking:- I'm sick of this shit, I'm out of here. Let her ruin someone else's weekends.

[@hoosiergirl6344]

Are you serious? I have a question, wtf is it always about the POS guy?? Why tf should I care about everything a guy wants, needs, requires? FT!

[@se.i.4393]

Ugh so many dramatic comments here 😂😭

[@christinacollins9251]

Better off without that bullshit. Goodbye.

[@redfather5342]

If she aint blowing get going